And here we go, chapter five. I hope it's to your liking. And thank you all for the wonderful reviews, even the 'anonymous' ones XD. Please, keep them coming.
WARNING: Inuyasha and Kagome might seem a little OOC at some point, but believe me, it was necessary this time around.
Breakers:
XxX: change of scene
~ξ~: time-skip
実: Beginning/End of Flashback
[T] and [/T]: beginning/End of soundtrack
Reminder: 'Inuyasha' written normally refers to Inuyasha, while written in cursive (cursive and bold in thoughts) refers to Kagome, the "Gentle Dog Demon".
Chapter 5 – Inuyasha's Decision
Inuyasha sighed as he leaned his head on his arms. He was sitting at his desk and attempting to do the homework he had been given for the weekend and hadn't done the day before, but he just couldn't concentrate. His thoughts kept going back to the talk with his mother that morning.
She had taken his story surprisingly well considering how unbelievable it was. And when he pointed it out, she had just smiled at him and said that after living at this shrine with his grandfather for her whole life before she met Inuyasha's father there wasn't a story that would sound overly farfetched to her. After all, her father had been feeding her all sorts of legends just like he did with Inuyasha. The only difference was that she actually listened and partially believed them. Especially the ones involving demons.
Izayoi had even given him a theory as to where it was that he had been. Before he had woken up, she had rummaged through the old scrolls at the shrine and found the old legend of the Shikon no Tama, which was said to have existed in the Feudal Era. According to her, as impossible as it seemed, the well might have taken him back in time, five hundred years into the past, when not only the Shikon but also yōkai were a commonly known existence, at least as far as legends went. Had it not been for the fact that it actually made sense, as much as Inuyasha hated to admit it, he probably wouldn't have believed her. But then again, he had been there and seen it all with his own eyes. And after seeing the magic-like things Kagome could do and fighting (or attempting to fight) a few demons himself, he found it not that stupid of an idea. It was the only thing that truly made sense anyway.
Inuyasha groaned as he shook his head trying to rid himself of those thoughts and concentrate on the chemistry problem he was trying to solve. He didn't have any luck though, as his thoughts immediately strayed again, this time to last night. Violet eyes narrowed in thought as the black haired boy glanced over his shoulder at the back of the chair he was sitting in. Kagome's jacket still hung from it as he had left it the night before. Inuyasha sighed.
She had given him the jacket during the fight and he remembered what she said about it. It was supposed to be like an armor or even stronger than that. And through experience, Inuyasha knew this to be true, for he had already tried to make even the tiniest hole in it with everything, from scissors to matches. But nothing worked. The fire didn't affect it at all and any sharp object just slid off the surface without leaving the tiniest scratch. When he tried to force in a nail, the thing actually broke before making so much as a small dent in the fabric that would prove he even tried to pierce it with anything. No matter what he tried, the thing refused to take any damage at all. That had to mean Kagome wasn't joking when she said it was better than any armor. Inuyasha narrowed his eyes as a thought struck him.
Since Kagome obviously was dead serious about that jacket, it had to mean it had been her armor when she fought anyone. Yet she left it with him and Inuyasha couldn't for the life of him figure out why she'd do that. After all, wouldn't she need it more than he would?
'And she was hurt too,' he couldn't help but remember as a small pang of guilt hit him. It had been his fault after all. She had given him her jacket and she had protected him. If it hadn't been for him being so weak, she wouldn't have gotten hurt in the first place.
Frowning at himself, Inuyasha shook his head again. 'It's not like I care or anything. I didn't ask her to protect me, damn it,' he thought furiously as he turned again and tried once more to concentrate on his homework. The thought that if she hadn't helped him then probably neither he nor his mother would be alive right now didn't fade from his thoughts though. He sighed.
'And I didn't ask her to even come in the first place. But she did,' he thought dejectedly. In all honesty, he felt it safe to assume that she came explicitly in order to save his and his mother's lives. And that in turn would mean that the only reason she was hurt was him. Had he been stronger, she wouldn't have had to come and help him. She would never have been hurt.
Frowning, Inuyasha shook his head again, a fierce scowl on his face. 'She has only her fucking self to blame. She should have just been more goddamned careful. And she didn't have to give me her jacket either, I never asked her too,' he thought furiously, trying to make himself believe that he didn't care and conveniently forgetting that if Kagome hadn't given him her jacket, he would probably be dead now, despite her protection.
A sudden knock on his door interrupted his following, fruitless attempt to concentrate again and he turned in his chair telling his mother to come on in. It couldn't be anyone else after all and it wasn't like he was getting anything done anyway. Not with his concentration straying constantly.
Izayoi entered her son's room with a little smile on her face. One look at him told her that he was far from thinking about his homework as she thought he had probably planned at first and she almost laughed at the thought. Of course, she knew why he was being so distracted. The hard part would be to make him see it as well and harder still would be to make him act upon it. But Izayoi knew very well how to steer her son to make him see reason. She was his mother after all and that made it all too easy for her to manipulate him somewhat. It was for his own good anyway, so she didn't feel too badly about it.
"I was thinking about the girl from last night," Izayoi said rather casually as she sat down at her son's bed. "The white haired one. You didn't actually say a lot about her this morning," she continued, remembering how the topic of the girl that had helped them out, if not even saved their lives, had been carefully avoided by her son. Of course, she wanted her son to see reason and act upon it, but that didn't mean she didn't want to satisfy her own curiosity, as well. Inuyasha grunted.
"That's because there's not much to tell," he said gruffly. "All I know is that she ain't human and that the villagers trust her. She's a hanyō, whatever that is. They call her the Inuyasha."
Izayoi blinked at the name, though not because it sounded like that of her son's, before her gaze turned sad. She sighed and Inuyasha turned his head towards her, not missing how her posture suddenly seemed a little slumped. He was about to ask her what was wrong when she spoke up.
"The Inuyasha, huh? So that was her… the poor girl," Izayoi said quietly to herself, but not quietly enough and Inuyasha heard her. Needless to say his interest was piqued.
"You know something about her?" he asked and turned fully towards his mother, this time leaning on the back of his chair and Kagome's jacket. Izayoi smiled sadly.
"There are a few tales about her," she answered vaguely but didn't say more. Inuyasha raised his eyebrows.
"What tales?" he asked despite himself. He would not admit it, but Kagome intrigued him and though he'd never tell so anyone, especially not her, he wanted to know more about her.
"Legends mostly," his mother replied. "She was mentioned in the legend of the Shikon no Tama, among others." Mentioned was of course an understatement, but Inuyasha didn't need to know that. Knowing his dislike of legends of any kind courtesy of her father, he'd probably leave it at that. And it was better the half-demon in question told him everything herself rather than a pile of old scrolls of questionable accuracy anyway.
"What did they say?" Inuyasha asked before he could bite his tongue. His mother eyed him quizzically, as if she had not been expecting that question, before smiling at him.
"Nothing you couldn't ask her about," she finally said, at which Inuyasha turned away and keh-ed. Izayoi's smile widened as her suspicions were confirmed, or at least part of them. So her son was intrigued with the strange girl after all… well then all she had to do was make sure he never got his hands on the scrolls that mentioned her in any legend, not that this would be hard, and give him the right push in another direction. That would prove to be harder though. "Why did she leave so quickly yesterday anyway?" she finally asked, not really directing the question at her son. The violet eyed boy replied nevertheless though, much to Izayoi's surprise.
"She didn't want to stay," he said curtly. Izayoi frowned.
"Why didn't you stop her anyway? She was hurt wasn't she?" the black haired woman didn't mean to sound gruff or accusing, but the questions unfortunately came out that way. Inuyasha flinched slightly at the (rather needless) reminder of Kagome's wounds as another wave of guild washed over him.
"It's not like I didn't try," he said sulkily as he stared out the window. He had tried to make her stay. It was her that refused!
"She'll be okay though, won't she?" Izayoi couldn't help but worry. She hadn't seen well for it was dark and they were on the other side of the shrine grounds, but even she could tell that Kagome's wounds were anything but minor.
"She said she would," Inuyasha replied quietly, still not meeting his mother's gaze. Izayoi watched his for a while before smiling slightly. It was plainly obvious Inuyasha was worried about her. He just refused to admit it. Unfortunately, he even refused to admit it to himself.
"She said so. But you don't know for sure, do you," It wasn't a question, it was a statement of the obvious. Inuyasha sighed almost inaudibly and slumped against the chair some more. He still refused to meet his mother's eyes for a while before his gaze hardened resolutely and he made a move to turn back towards his desk and the homework resting upon it.
"I don't," he replied in a gruff tone. "But I don't care either. It was her decision to leave without letting herself be treated, she can take responsibility for her own actions."
"You know Inuyasha, it's alright to be worried," Izayoi said with a small smile, seeing straight through her son's little act. The black haired teen glared at his chemistry paper before letting his glare soften a little and directing it at his mother by turning towards her again.
"I'm not worried," he growled out but his mother only smiled that keep-telling-yourself-that smile of hers. "Keh," he said as a response to said smile and turned his head towards the window again.
"Of course you aren't," she finally said as she stood up and left the room, leaving the still slightly angry Inuyasha behind. The black haired boy stared after his mother before snorting to himself.
"I'm not worried," he replied to himself as he straightened up, his gaze falling on Kagome's jacket again. He frowned. "I'm not," he replied as if trying to convince himself it was the case. It soon proved to be a losing battle though.
As he turned around on his chair and leaned his arms on his desk and his head on his arms like before, he heard something thump lightly against the wood. Looking down, he noticed the Jewel of Four Souls still hanging around his neck and took it in his palm to bring it at eye-level for closer inspection.
According to Kagome, that yōkai came here because it wanted the Jewel. And she came here because of that yōkai. So it wasn't his fault she was hurt. It was that yōkai who hurt her anyway.
But then again, if he hadn't brought the Shikon back home the yōkai wouldn't have come either. And Kagome got hurt mostly because she gave him her protection-armor-jacket. Besides, didn't she push him out of the way and take that poisoned spear wound in his place?
Violet eyes widened suddenly and Inuyasha shot up straight in his chair. That's right… he'd forgotten completely about the poison!
But then again, he wanted Kagome to stay and she was the one who refused. So he shouldn't worry. And it was her who forgot to take the jacket back, he didn't take it from her on purpose.
But she left to make sure no other yōkai came through the well, didn't she?
Inuyasha groaned as he fell back on his desk in defeat, still trying to win a losing internal battle. Sure, most of what happened was because of the Jewel so he could blame it… but then again, it was just a pearl, wasn't it? A powerful magical pearl that yōkai wanted for said power. But it couldn't actually decide what happened to it now could it? So if anyone was truly to blame, it would be Inuyasha.
After all, he had been the one to bring the Jewel back to the Sengoku Era and remind the demons there that the Jewel existed. He had brought it home with him. And he had been the one who was so helpless in battle that Kagome had to protect him and get hurt in the process. And even after the fight, she didn't even take care of her own injuries. Instead, she went back through the well to make sure no other threat came through to Inuyasha and his mother. But she was hurt and poisoned on top of that… anything could happen. She could even by dying right now for all he knew.
"Damn," Inuyasha cursed under his breath as guilt kept slamming into him mercilessly. He couldn't deny it no matter how much he wanted to. What happened to Kagome had been his fault and if she died because of her injuries it would be his fault as well. After all, she wouldn't have to protect him like she did if he could just stand his own ground against demons.
But Kagome said she's be fine. Certainly she wouldn't say that if it weren't the truth, right?
Right?
Damn it all, why was he even thinking about it? He wasn't worried about her, not at all. He wasn't!
Besides, even if he did go through the well to check on her, what could he possibly do? Most likely nothing. After all, what did he know about poisons and tending to wounds? And anyway, he repeated to himself over and over, Kagome said she'd be fine, so she most likely would.
Having somewhat convinced himself of that, Inuyasha took a deep breath to clear his mind and focused only on his chemistry homework, shutting any other thought, especially those about the Feudal Era and a certain, white haired hanyō, out of his conscious before it was even fully formed.
Izayoi meanwhile had seated herself at the kitchen table with a set of first aid articles and a small, white kit. It was the first aid kit she had found in the bathroom and she was just checking to see if there was anything missing in it. She knew Inuyasha so she could predict how his internal battle would end. He might deny it now, but she was more than certain he would end up going to check on that poor girl anyway. So she'd have to make a kit ready for the moment he was ready to leave.
As she started to replace the objects back in the kit, Izayoi stopped suddenly mid-movement as a thought struck her. She was actually planning on letting her son, or more like coax him into going back to the Feudal Era. A time where yōkai were common and where one had to fight every day just to survive. An era where staying alive was hard enough, especially with all the demons lurking around. And with the Sacred Jewel in his possession, Inuyasha would be a certain target for those yōkai. Normally, his chances of survival, especially after what Izayoi had seen the night before, would be close to none. And yet, she wasn't worried about him at all.
Normal mothers would do anything to make sure their children would stay home where it was safe, or at least make sure they didn't go somewhere as dangerous as five hundred years into the past through some old, magical well. And yet she was doing exactly the opposite. She was actually trying to make her son go there. If that didn't brand her as crazy, Izayoi didn't know what to think of herself.
Then again, yōkai weren't the only thing in the Warring States. There were also a lot of humans, naturally, and quite the number of monks, miko and a few kannushi even. Besides, Izayoi had seen more than just danger in the fight of the previous night. Inuyasha might deny it all he wanted, but Izayoi was sure she saw the beginnings of friendship in that fight. The way Inuyasha looked sometimes when the white haired girl was playing the bait. The way she had protected him that one time with her own body. The way they fought together, even though her son obviously needed training if he wanted to survive. All that had shown Izayoi more than she needed. She was certain nothing bad would befall Inuyasha as long as he stayed within that white haired girl's reach. She would protect him with her life and Izayoi trusted her with the life of her son. The hanyō just had an air about her that made you trust her.
Besides which, Izayoi also knew that even if he didn't go back through the well, Inuyasha would still get into fights here. He always did, despite everything Izayoi told him. The only real difference would be that over there, he wouldn't fight alone. He would have a friend, or maybe even friends to fight alongside him. And that was more than Izayoi could ask for. She had always wanted for her son to find friends, something he seemed incapable of at home. But maybe the Sengoku Era would be different. And that aside, Izayoi noticed something else too.
Inuyasha might not notice it yet, but his mother had seen it. The way he sometimes gazed at the well ever since he'd returned - before and after the fight. As if he really wanted to go back. Izayoi didn't doubt he did. Inuyasha was a free spirit and always had been. A free spirit that would most likely feel at least a little caged in the kind of life the 21st century imposed. He might not know it yet, but Izayoi saw it more than once in his eyes; he longed for freedom. And during his short stay in the Feudal Era, he had gotten a taste of it.
The black haired woman sighed as she closed the first aid kit. She was sure it wouldn't be too long before her son finally made his mind up. And somehow, she couldn't help but smile. She knew it would be good for him. And as any mother should, she wanted what would be best for her child. Even if it meant letting him go (or more like coaxing him into going) five hundred years into the dangerous past.
~ξ~
It was late afternoon when Inuyasha finally descended down the stairs from his room and into the kitchen after his mother called him at least three times for dinner. He had finally managed to finish all of his homework, but with nothing to distract him now, his thoughts kept wandering off to the Bone Eaters Well and the hanyō-girl from the past.
Dinner was a silent affair as the black haired boy was lost in his thoughts. Izayoi kept quiet as well as she observed her son. It was as if he wasn't even aware she was there. It was rare to see him as lost in thought as he was now. His violet eyes kept darting between his food and the window, through which one could see the well house. Izayoi bit back a sigh of frustration as she observed him.
The worry he felt was almost palpable, a concerned aura rolling off of him in waves(1). But of course, Inuyasha would never admit to it. He was too stubborn and too proud for that. Quite frankly, Izayoi often found herself thinking that he was worse than his father in that aspect, and that was saying a lot since her husband was stubborn as a mule, if not even worse. Finally, the black haired woman couldn't take it anymore and decided to just be straight forward. Gods knew Inuyasha wouldn't get it otherwise.
"The door to the well house is still open you know," she said calmly as Inuyasha finished his meal and stared off again, his eyes wandering to the window and the well house on the other side of the glass. When his mother spoke however, he quickly whipped his head around to face her.
"What?" he asked curtly. He had a feeling he knew what his mother was implying, but he'd be damned he showed that he wanted to go. What kind of son would he be if he did that? He had already worried his mother enough. Besides, Kagome said she'd be fine, so she would be. There was no need for him to go. And he didn't even want to go.
Or at least that's what he kept telling himself. Izayoi sighed.
"If you wish to go then just do what your heart tells you to do," his mother replied softly. "That's what you always did and I never stopped you. I'm certainly not about to start now," she said with a small laugh. Inuyasha blinked.
"Haha-ue…" he said quietly as he stared at her. She was really willing to let him go? Just like that? But… he couldn't just leave like that, could he? He couldn't leave her alone. "Keh," he said as he tried to hide his real feelings behind the well practiced mask of annoyance that always worked on everyone. "I never said I wanted to go back there. What makes you think I do?" he asked a little more gruffly than he intended. He was rewarded with a glare from his mother.
"Inuyasha, who do you think I am?" she finally asked, her voice an octave lower, showing that she was slowly losing her patience. Inuyasha glanced at her a little nervously, but covered it up quickly again. This only served to aggravate his mother even more though. "If you think that I am going to fall for this sad excuse for a tough-guy-mask, then you're sadly mistaken young man. I am your mother for God's sake, one would think you would know I know you too well to fall for it," she said as she sighed and stood up from the table, heading over to the kitchen. She wasn't really angry with her son, but if she didn't show him the little bit of the temper she possessed that had actually served to make his father even look at her (something she heard her husband thank the heavens for many many times even after their marriage), she knew her son wouldn't listen.
As for Inuyasha, he was rooted to the chair in surprise. Sure, his mother wasn't downright angry, nor was she shouting. But still, this was the first time Inuyasha had seen Izayoi with anything but a kind smile on her face and it came as a surprise. Up until now, he never suspected she even had the smallest back bone. Not that it was a bad thing, it only meant he had to be a better protector. But it would seem there were sides to his mother he had yet to see. And what surprised him even more was that she saw through his mask so easily.
Then again, she was his mother, so the black haired teen should have probably expected that.
He was shaken out of his reverie when a middle-sized, brown backpack landed in front of him on the table. He glanced first at the pack and then at his mother, who was the one to place it before him. She was smiling again.
"I already packed it," she said simply. "There's a change of clothes, a little food, and of course a first aid kit, among other things. All I ask for is that you come home from time to time to let me know you're alright," Izayoi continued, smile still in place. And Inuyasha couldn't help but notice that it was genuine.
"Haha-ue…" he said in amazement, but before he could protest to her insinuation that he actually wanted to go, she thrust the pack into his hands and all but shoved him towards the door.
"Now, off you go. Do what you feel you should do." She was still smiling and Inuyasha finally dropped his act of not wanting to go, smiling softly back.
"Arigato, haha-ue," he said quietly as he grabbed the pack from her, put his shoes on and darted out of the house towards the well. Izayoi watched him go with a smile still in place. Of course, she was aware that he probably wasn't going to be gone for just a week this time. Somehow she knew this time he was leaving for longer. But she didn't mind. As long as her son was happy, she was happy as well. And she wasn't worried either, knowing she didn't have a reason to be.
'I know she will protect him,' Izayoi thought as she watched her son enter the well house and disappear inside. 'And I know I can trust the Inuyasha with my son's life. She will not fail him. She will protect him better than anyone else. I just know it.'
XxX
Inuyasha sighed as he stood at the lip of the well, suddenly uncertain. Why the Hell he was even thinking of going back was beyond him. But still, the feeling was there. He didn't really know what caused it, but something drew him to the other side. Though of course, he was not going because he was worried about Kagome. No, he was going because… well, he had a reason and it was not because he was worried about her!
But then, what was his reason? He didn't really know. He just knew he felt the urge to go and now that his mother told him he could, he found nothing holding him back anymore, nothing to use as an excuse to tell himself he shouldn't go, and before he knew what he was even doing, he was on the lip of the well and jumping in. It wasn't long before the now somewhat familiar light surrounded him and he floated through the portal and back in time. All too soon, the light vanished and he landed lightly on the bottom of the well.
Looking up, he was greeted by the sight of a blue sky. Sighing and once again asking himself what had compelled him to go back, Inuyasha slung his back pack more comfortably on his shoulder and gripped the vines that grew inside the well and started to climb out. When he reached the top however, he was met with a sight he definitely didn't expect. Flying straight at him was a black crow.
This would have been more or less normal, if said crow not didn't have bloody red eyes, sharp looking teeth and claws that were more than ready to embed themselves in Inuyasha's flesh. Inuyasha froze in surprise and the bird would have gotten him, had it not been cut to shreds by a few red blade-like projectiles a good two feet away from him. Kagome landed lightly on the ground right next to the well and frowned at him. He was quick to notice that she was still in the same bloodied and torn shirt she had on last night. Why she didn't even change, thus raising the risk of infecting her wounds and making them even worse than they already were was beyond him. Did she really want to die that badly?
Before he could even glare in response, she just sighed in exasperation, grabbed him by his back pack and pulled him effortlessly out of the well and set him on the ground beside her.
"Why did you come back?" she asked, cutting straight to the point. Inuyasha stayed silent. There was no bloody way he would tell her he had been worried about her (because he wasn't!), but he hadn't exactly been expecting her to be right by the well when he got here, so he didn't have an excuse ready just yet, except for one. Grunting, he held out his one hand in which Kagome only now noticed he was holding her fire rat fur jacket. Inuyasha hadn't even noticed he had grabbed it when he came to dinner or when he dashed out of the house a little while ago, but was suddenly glad that he had.
"You forgot that yesterday," he grunted as he held it out to her, waiting for her to take it back. She sighed again as she took it and slowly put it on.
"I left it on purpose," she replied looking around. "Just in case."
Inuyasha decided not to probe the subject. Somehow he knew that he didn't want to know what she meant. So instead, he asked: "Why were you here? So near the well I mean?"
"I said I would make sure no other demon came through, didn't I?" she replied almost casually as she sat next to the well, her golden eyes still scanning her surroundings warily. "I can hardly do that if I'm not close by."
"You mean… you've been fighting off yōkai this whole time?" Inuyasha asked as another pang of guilt hit him. Even when he wasn't here, she was protecting him, protecting the portal that led to his world. Just because he wasn't strong enough to protect himself.
"What of it?"
"Why would you do that?"
"Would you rather I allowed you and your mother to get killed?"
"That doesn't answer my question."
"Too bad. That's the only answer I have."
Inuyasha stared at her as her words finally sank in. She wasn't doing it for herself, not even close. She just wanted to make sure he and his mother were safe. Inuyasha's gaze lowered to the ground as he sat beside her, laying his back pack on the ground. Silence enveloped the pair, but it didn't last long.
"How… how are your wounds?" Inuyasha finally asked quietly and Kagome smiled sweetly.
"Oh, you came just because you were worried about me? That's so sweet," she teased as Inuyasha frowned.
"Keh, I wasn't worried. I was just asking, stupid," he replied gruffly, turning his head away. The smile died on Kagome's lips, giving place to surprise that Inuyasha did not notice. Golden eyes widened as Kagome stared at the human beside her. 'He really was worried,' she thought in amazement and a small smile graced her lips. Sure, for her Kikyo wasn't a fifty year old memory, but aside from her and her sister… it had just been so long since anyone worried about her. It somehow made her feel warm.
"They're healed," she answered quietly as she turned her gaze back to the forest, hiding her calm and content expression from Inuyasha's eyes as the young human turned his head to face her. He raised his eyebrows at her.
"What do you mean, healed? There's no way in Hell they're fucking healed. You've just got them yesterday and they weren't just scratches that could heal overnight," the black haired human growled at her and Kagome sighed and shrugged.
"I told you, I'm not like you. To me, those were just small scratches. And they're healed already," she said, her voice betraying she was tired of trying to get her point across to the human next to her. But Inuyasha still didn't believe her.
"And I'm telling you there's no goddamned way…"
"You still didn't tell me why you came back. It wasn't just because of my jacket, was it?" Kagome interrupted him, being in no mood to strip just to show him she was indeed healed. Upon hearing her question, Inuyasha quickly shut up as he tried to find a legitimate reason. There was no way he was telling Kagome he had been worried about her. Simply because that wasn't the case, end of story.
His violet eyes suddenly landed on the pink Jewel still hanging around his neck and something the half-demon girl said last night came back to his mind, making him narrow his eyes.
"Oi, hanyō-wench(2)," Inuyasha started, not noticing the wrong way he accentuated the word 'hanyō'. But Kagome did notice and stiffened, her gaze hardening immediately.
"What?" she asked harshly, her tone changing immediately to a much colder and menacing one. A low growl emitted from her throat in warning and Inuyasha's eyes widened a little as he leaned away from her as she glared at him. He caught himself quickly though, brushing off his first reaction as simple surprise, and scowling right back.
"Chill out, geez. I just wanted to ask you a question," he growled back, as he usually did when someone acted towards him with hostility. But deep down he couldn't help but wonder what happened to bring about the sudden change. Not even a second ago, she was all smiles and such. Where did this sudden hostility come from?
He wouldn't admit it, but it actually scared him a little. Especially since he knew Kagome had claws that could very easily bring a swift end to him, should the white haired girl 'lose control' of them.
"Out with it then," Kagome all but barked back, flexing her claws and sniffing around. Just when she would like a yōkai to come along, of course there weren't any around. How typical.
If there was one thing she hated and didn't allow anyone to do, it was to call her a half-breed. There wasn't a single soul in her memory that dared to call her a hanyō and lived to tell the tale, except maybe when she was just a small pup who couldn't fight yet. But from the moment she was on her own and learned what that word meant, she didn't forgive anyone who dared to call her that. She wouldn't allow anyone to degrade her without paying the price.
It might be cruel, yes, but in her eyes, it was necessity. If she didn't crush them, they would sooner or later crush her. If not physically, then mentally. And that was just as bad, if not worse.
Inuyasha wasn't aware of how lucky he was to actually still be alive. The only few reasons Kagome didn't follow her usual rule were that, for one, he was human and she despised killing humans, two: he was the only one who could guard the Jewel and three: whether she liked it or not, she still owed him for freeing her from Kikyo's spell. It didn't matter that she saved his ass at least three times already, she still owed him. And she couldn't very well kill someone whom she owed this much. It was against her nature and against everything her mother taught her. And to go against her mother's teachings was one thing Kagome vowed to never ever do, no matter the circumstances.
Still, to hear him utter that particular word as a way to refer to her hurt. A lot. It always did, no matter who said it. And when Kagome hurt, all her opponent knew was that she was pissed beyond belief, for she refused to show any kind of pain to anyone, especially those who wanted to see it. Inuyasha would be no exception to that rule.
"You said that… that yōkai yesterday… it came after the Jewel?" Inuyasha asked, fingering the gem and not looking up, violet eyes examining the pearl thoroughly. Kagome took a few deep breaths to calm her anger before she even attempted to answer. Maybe Inuyasha didn't mean it. Maybe it just slipped out of his mouth by accident.
'Keep telling yourself that, darling,' Kagome thought sarcastically to herself as she breathed deeply in and out one more time as her anger calmed. But she knew it was bubbling just beneath the surface and it wouldn't take much for it to surface again. She wouldn't be able to be completely calm until either Inuyasha apologized, which she doubted would happen, or until she found something to let out her frustration, hurt and anger on, most likely killing it in the process. A yōkai preferably.
"Yeah," she said as calmly as she could, trying to control her temper. Inuyasha shot her a surprised look when she didn't leash out at him again. 'Talk about mood swings,' he thought angrily, still scowling at the girl before him. What had her so riled up anyway?
"The Jewel can grant wishes and increase a yōkai's power incredibly. That's why yōkai are after it, and consequently after you. As long as you have it, you will be their target," the Inuyasha continued without faltering and Inuyasha's eyes widened. That would mean that as long as he had the blasted Jewel, both he and his mother would be in danger.
He couldn't allow that. He couldn't risk his mother's life just for a stupid Jewel like this. No way in Hell.
So with one quick motion, he grabbed the Jewel in his fist and ripped it off his neck, handing it over to Kagome.
"Then take the blasted thing," he said, holding the Jewel out to her. "You can protect it, can't you? Since you're not weak like me being hanyō and all." 'Whatever that means,' he added in his thoughts sarcastically, the last of his little 'speech' being spat out with venom, showing he wasn't quite accepting what he assumed she thought of him. Kagome frowned. 'So now it's half-demon, not half-breed, huh?' she thought as she grabbed the human's wrist and turned his hand around so that his fist was facing upwards. She then snatched the pink gem up and placed it back in his hand, then proceeded with closing his fingers around it before releasing his hand quickly.
"I told you already, you're the only one who can protect the Jewel," she said gently, her anger having evaporated at the worry she smelt coming off of him. Worry the Inuyasha suspected to be more for the black haired boy's mother than for himself.
With his request, Inuyasha had actually reminded her that he was from far away. A place where neither yōkai nor hanyō seemed to exist. So Inuyasha probably didn't know just how he had insulted her when he called her a hanyō. 'He probably doesn't even hear the difference between a hanyō and a hanyō. It must sound the same to him. Either that or he thinks there's no difference between those two words,' the silver haired girl thought somewhat sadly. Such thoughts may have calmed her anger, but the hurt was still there. The young half-demon hid it well from the kannushi before her though. Biting back a sigh, the hanyō spoke again when Inuyasha didn't respond.
"And I never said you were weak…"
"You did," Inuyasha interrupted her angrily, but Kagome continued, unfazed.
"… or at least not in the sense you seem to think I meant it."
"Then what did you mean?" The black haired teen from the future asked sourly. The Inuyasha sighed.
"I meant you are weak now. Weak compared to me or to how you could be," Kagome said calmly and stood up, walking a few feet ahead of him. Inuyasha stared at her and knowing she had his attention, the golden eyed girl continued. "True, you're weak now. But you're not half bad for a human, especially considering you're not from here. And with the right training you could be really strong. You have a lot of potential, you know. I believe you could even exceed Kikyo by a long shot. And believe me, that's saying a lot."
Inuyasha just stared at her with wide eyes. Sure, she was saying he was weak, but she was also telling him he could be strong. Heck, she even said he was strong for a human, which Inuyasha figured was quite a compliment coming from the hanyō-girl.
So basically, she was saying that while he wasn't super-strong and unbeatable and what-not, he wasn't a complete failure in her eyes either. She was even saying he could be much better and it was almost as if she were encouraging him to better himself or if she were offering it to him. And that was the first time that had happened. Hell, it was the first time when she talked about something like this and wasn't actually talking down to him. No, scratch that. It was the first time in a very long while that anyone talked to him about something like this without talking down to him, even if the people that did usually got beaten into the ground afterwards when he decided to show them just how wrong they were for talking down to him.
"I can't be the only one able to protect this damned stone," Inuyasha finally said, swiftly changing the subject. "I mean, why me of all people? Why can't someone else take it? Someone from here?" He had already asked Kaede that the last time he was here. But he still couldn't understand it. The way the old priestess had answered him only led to more questions rather than answering the original one.
Kagome sighed as she turned around to face him again. She didn't answer for a long time, contemplating how to phrase her explanation. Inuyasha slowly started to think she wasn't going to answer at all, so he was a little surprised when she finally spoke.
"I don't know all about the Shikon," she said slowly. "But I know that if it's not in the possession of a miko like Kikyo or a kannushi like yourself - and it has to be a powerful one – it gets defiled easily. And when it's defiled, it lends even more power to demons who have it, becoming evil itself. And when a defiled, evil Shikon no Tama is in the possession of a yōkai, then you can say sayonara to the world as we know it and to any human living in it, because nothing will be left. And if there is, it'll have to live through Hell on earth, quite literally. Which is why the Jewel must be kept pure, which is a task only a strong miko or kannushi can accomplish."
"But… you just said I was weak…" he was being pathetic, he knew. The black haired teen was grasping at straws now. Sure, he hated being considered weak by anyone, but he couldn't endanger his mother like that. Plus, the way Kagome made it sound, having the Jewel meant basically protecting the world. And as arrogant as Inuyasha was, he wasn't stupid and didn't think himself to be that strong. Kagome sighed in exasperation.
"And I also said you have a lot of potential," she repeated tiredly and glared at him. "You may or may not believe me, but your spiritual powers are very strong, uncontrolled as they may be, which is why you need to train. Still, you are powerful. And you had the Jewel, it was within your body for crying out loud. If that's not proof enough for you that you're the only one who can keep it safe then I don't know what else to tell you."
"I can't be the only one," Inuyasha protested weakly, fear slowly creeping up his spine. He had expected her to say a lot of things, but definitely not that. Protecting the world was not something on his agenda and he definitely wasn't feeling ready for that. "There has to be someone else."
Kagome's glare softened when she gazed at his slouched form. She didn't quite understand the big deal at first, but now more than ever Inuyasha reminded her that he wasn't like her, nor was he a full demon. He was human. Given his short temper and overall behavior, she sometimes forgot that. This was one of those times.
Inuyasha was human. This in turn meant that even though he looked her age, he was in reality much much younger. He was but a pup compared to her. Add to that the fact that, as far as she had seen in the little time she'd spent in his world, he came from a place overall much safer than her own with no danger lurking around every corner and no need to fear for your life almost every second. If she considered all of that, she could understand why he suddenly seemed to have cold feet. She probably shouldn't have given him the whole, general picture of why the Jewel needed his protection. She should have squelched it down to something he could have handled.
And there was also his mother. It was evident Inuyasha was not only worried about himself, but about his mother as well, even more so for her than for his own skin. Most likely because he knew that so long as he had the Jewel, he would endanger his mother each time he went back to his world.
Kagome's eyes softened even more as she continued to observe him. She might not truly understand what he was going through right now, but she could more or less imagine it. After all, she knew how it felt to endanger those close to you just by being there and she knew what kind of life the guardian of the Shikon led. She'd known Kikyo long enough to know.
She really shouldn't have presented the whole picture. She should have expected Inuyasha wouldn't be able to handle it well. Besides, it wasn't as if her or Kikyo ever really thought of the whole picture while protecting the Jewel either. All that mattered was keeping the pearl safe. No one ever mentioned what would happen if they failed. Everyone knew but everyone pretended not to know also. There wasn't a single soul ever thinking about protecting the Jewel in order to protect the world, simply because there was no soul in the world that would willingly take on such a burden.
And yet she had just thrown it at Inuyasha without even trying to make it less grave than it was. She was in idiot. The young half-demon-girl sighed.
"There might be a miko or a kannushi somewhere out there who could take it," she said finally and didn't miss how Inuyasha's head snapped up. The golden eyed hanyō cringed inwardly at having to crush his hopes so swiftly. "There may,' she stressed. "There doesn't have to be. And even if there is, you'd have to find him or her first, and he or she might be anywhere."
Inuyasha hung his head again. It would seem he was stuck with the Shikon Jewel and the danger and responsibility that came with it. It wasn't actually the danger that bothered him though, at least not because of his own safety; more like because of his mother's safety. But what bothered him most was the responsibility that came with the Jewel. Responsibility to basically protect the world. And no matter from which side he looked at it, the thought terrified him. He wasn't ready for it. He doubted anyone would be. He cursed under his breath, trying fruitlessly to turn his fear into anger, but it didn't work.
"But you know, if there is someone out there who could take the Shikon no Tama, I'm sure we'll find him or her," Kagome said lightly, trying to lift the black haired human's spirits again, at least a little bit.
"We?" Inuyasha asked bewildered as he looked up at the half-demon. The silver haired girl smiled.
"You didn't think I'd leave you all on your own to look for a suitable guardian of the Shikon, did you? Someone needs to make sure you don't give it to the wrong person or that you don't get killed on the way," she answered. There was something in the way she said it, almost as if she were joking, that made Inuyasha want to grin at her, but he suppressed the urge. Kagome turned around again and started walking towards Kaede's village. She didn't go further than five steps however before she stopped and glanced at Inuyasha over her shoulder, smile still in place. "Well, come on you slowpoke," she said as she started walking again. Inuyasha scoffed and stood up, following swiftly after her.
XxX
Kaede sat calmly by the fire in her hut with a contemplating look on her face as Kagome briefly explained to her why she and Inuyasha were there and what they had planned. The elder priestess sighed.
"So ye are planning to find someone who could take on my sister's burden in Inuyasha's stead?" she finally asked and Kagome nodded slowly. Inuyasha stayed quiet and had a scowl on his face, though what exactly he was thinking about was a mystery to both the elder miko and the hanyō. "Ye are aware such a journey might, in the end, be for nothing, are ye not?"
Kagome nodded again and Kaede stopped her questioning as she regarded her half-demon 'sister'. She knew her well enough by know to read her better than most people and she saw the way the silver haired girl kept glancing at Inuyasha. The elder miko had figured Kagome out almost instantly, as the half-demon had probably expected her to.
Kagome agreed to, or more likely offered, this journey to Inuyasha more to humor him than anything else. Just like Kaede, the hanyō didn't believe they'd actually find someone. Mikos or kannushi who could rival Kikyo's, and consequently Inuyasha's, spiritual power were extremely rare and were even considered legendary. The probability of Inuyasha and Kagome finding someone to take on the Jewel was so small that succeeding in such a feat would actually be a miracle. And Kagome knew that. Yet still, she offered the black haired boy the hope.
Kaede understood her reasoning though, for Kagome had also, though extremely briefly so that Inuyasha didn't catch it, summed up her conversation with Inuyasha prior to her decision. The elder miko could understand Inuyasha's feelings regarding the responsibility thrust so suddenly upon him, and thus understood what Kagome had planned.
In order to protect the Shikon, Inuyasha needed to get stronger. He had two ways of doing that. Either to find a master who would train him, in which case it would undoubtedly be Kaede, or learn by himself by lack of choice as he traveled throughout Japan. But at any rate, if he was unwilling to learn, neither way would work. And fear of responsibility definitely counted as a serious block.
The journey itself then was, by default, something to reassure him. By traveling, he would have the hope of finding someone who would take the Jewel instead of him. Thanks to that, he wouldn't be thinking about the responsibility he carried all the time and there would be nothing blocking his growth, so he would be steadily growing stronger and learning to control his powers as they continued to travel, for he wouldn't have any other choice.
In other words, by offering to look for someone to 'replace' Inuyasha, Kagome was killing two birds with one stone, as she'd help Inuyasha get stronger like he apparently wished to and assured the protection of the Jewel of Four Souls at the same time.
Kaede had to admit, if she looked at it that way, Kagome's plan was nothing short of brilliant, even if the black haired teen in question would probably be livid when he found out what they had tricked him into doing. The elder miko sighed.
"I suppose that means ye will be needing a weapon," she said. Kagome raised an eyebrow.
"He needs one," she said, pointing at Inuyasha with her head and raising her claws at the height of her face to show the priestess. "These are weapon enough for me. And I still have my bow for that day," she added, referring to that one day of the month when she'd turn human. Kaede smiled.
"If ye both have weapons, then what do ye need this old miko for?" she asked calmly. Kagome narrowed her eyes when she caught her meaning while Inuyasha blinked.
"He ain't using my bow. He used it once, but that was an emergency. I won't be giving it to him any time soon," Kagome growled dangerously, although Kaede wasn't fazed by it in the least. She knew the young hanyō wouldn't attack her.
"I don't need a bow. My fists are enough," Inuyasha added confidently, forgetting that he wasn't talking about beating up other unarmed humans but fighting against demons. Kagome laughed.
"Yeah, because the centipede and the other two yōkai were so very scared of your punches," the hanyō replied sarcastically, reminding him none too gently that he would indeed need a weapon. Inuyasha scoffed, refusing to admit that she was right, but Kagome still smirked, knowing she had won.
"I still ain't using a bow. I'll take a sword if anything(3). I'm not a wuss who needs to stay away from an enemy in battle. I fight close range," he said, his voice becoming deeper and deeper as he spoke as he gradually became angrier since Kagome had yet to stop snickering. His words silenced her though.
"A sword, huh? Do you know how to handle one?" she asked, seriously this time, neither of them noticing that Kaede left the hut, probably in order to get said weapon, though Kagome wasn't sure if the old priestess could possibly have priest-swords in stock. Inuyasha was about to send her a 'well duh!' look, but stopped himself and didn't answer. After all, Kendo probably wasn't anything like the kind of swordsmanship Kagome was asking about. The Inuyasha sighed. "I thought as much," she said just as Kaede returned. The elder priestess wordlessly marched over to Inuyasha and handed him a sheathed sword.
Inuyasha gazed at the weapon in wonder. It had a simple straight hilt with a guard and the sheath was deep blue with some weird symbols visible in a lighter shade of the same color, which Kaede explained to be sacred symbols designed to protect both the blade and its wielder, as well as allow the sword to channel priest-powers without getting damaged like most normal swords would. Besides those, the old miko explained, the blade itself was also strengthened by other spells.
His eyes becoming wider by the second, Inuyasha slowly grasped the hilt and slowly unsheathed the sword, revealing a simple straight katana with a light-blue blade, the color being due to the spells and, as Kaede explained, to the 'color' of Inuyasha's aura.
"What's its name?" Kagome asked finally when it became evident Inuyasha wasn't going to say anything. Inuyasha might not be aware of it yet, but knowing his sword's name was something that was in a way essential to a swordsman. One could not wield a sword properly if he did not know its name, much like he could not get to know a person without knowing what they were called. The young hanyō bit back a sigh.
"Seiryuu," Kaede replied and Inuyasha looked at her with furrowed brows.
"Seiryuu?" he asked, testing the name on his tongue. Kaede nodded and Inuyasha frowned. "I might not know a lot about swords in this era, but aren't their names supposed to be significant for them? How can 'clear stream' be significant in any way?"
"Just because it seems to be insignificant doesn't mean it actually is," Kaede replied wisely. "Priest swords tend to have names that describe them in a way. I am sure ye will understand the name as you learn to use the sword."
Inuyasha didn't say anything in response and neither did Kagome as she mulled over some things. Finally making up her mind, the hanyō sighed, stood and moved towards the exit of the hut. She wouldn't be staying for the night. She rarely did. She preferred sleeping out in the open.
"Get some rest. We're setting off tomorrow morning," Inuyasha heard Kagome say as she exited the hut. But then she stopped, as if remembering something and glanced at him over her shoulder with a frown on her face.
"I can't help you learn to control your priest powers, you'll have to figure that out on your own as we travel, because I won't be saving your sorry ass every time yōkai come around," she said. Inuyasha nodded his understanding and turned around, believing the conversation to be over, and turned his attention to his back pack, hoping his mother had packed something like a sleeping bag or something of the sort. He froze however, when he heard what Kagome said next.
"And as for your swordsmanship, I'll train you myself."
(1) This is not to be confused with auras Inuyasha will be able to sense later on or those other mikos monks and the like are able to sense. Izayoi is just reading her son as any mother should be able to do here. She's NOT a priestess or anything, nor does she have any powers.
(2) I read somewhere that in Japanese 'hanyō' can mean, depending on how you accentuate it, both 'half-demon' and 'half-breed'. In this case, Inuyasha meant to call Kagome 'half-demon-wench' as a mild insult. However, the way he pronounced it changed the meaning to 'half-breed-wench', thus Kagome's anger (I decided to go with 'wench' instead of 'girl', 'cause 'wench' suits Inuyasha more when it comes to calling Kagome names). To always distinguish between the two, because it may come up later in the story again, 'hanyō' written normally means 'half-demon', whereas in cursive (bold and cursive in thoughts) it's the different pronunciation and will mean 'half-breed'. Also, since there are no hanyō or yōkai in Inuyasha's time, I'm going to 'assume' those two terms are used in 'Feudal Japanese', meaning Inuyasha doesn't quite understand them and doesn't really hear the difference in accentuation, hence the confusion and his lack of knowing why Kagome got pissed. The idea comes from the fact that in canon, Kagome gave off the feeling of not understanding the word 'hanyō' when she first heard it (since she didn't figure out what it meant for Inuyasha and asked herself what he was).
(3) I don't know if in Shinto religion there are priests who use swords instead of bows and Hamaya. Frankly, I doubt it. But for the sake of the story, let's pretend there are because I don't know about you, but I have a really hard time picturing Inuyasha with something other than a sword, much less a bow. Not for permanent use in battle anyway.
There we go, all done.
This chapter was actually tougher to write than I thought it would. I kept rereading and rewriting it. I was never satisfied. Well, I am now, after a few hours of working on it. I hope it is to your liking also. Why don't you leave a review telling me what you thought? You know I appreciate those :D