Hello, everyone!
I'm back with the second part of the chapter (some 8000 words with author's notes)! For once there's little break between chapters. I guess it could be consider a birthday gift if any of my readers happens to have birthday around now. :)
Not much else to say, so let's get onto it!
(* * *)
Previously on The World Kanon Only Knows:
We get to see Keima streaming, entertaining Tsukiyo, Nanaka and Haqua and contemplating change just as he gets the news of Kanon geting back from her all-over-Japan concert tour early due to winter weather. Kanon decides to spend the entire day at Katsuragi's residence. She follows Mari's advice to be a little bolder, which turns to be a double-edge sword where Keima takes a liking to her neck, earning the idol several hickeys. Things seem to be going well for Kanon, but the final high-school exams soon will be upon them.
Let's see how will our favorite idol deal with that!
Enjoy!
(* * *)
In the end, Eri didn't notice anything, but that couldn't be said for Mari, who gave Kanon thumbs up. In result, Kanon decided to hide the hickeys with make-up. That didn't turn out so well, but a rescue came in the form of Apollo and her healing spells, which Kanon gladly accepted. After the red spots vanished Kanon made a rule to not let Keima near her neck, at least not when she was supposed to perform in several days following that.
And perform she had. Her all-over-Japan concert tour might be over and she spent more time at home and studying, but that didn't mean her idol duties were abandoned. She still had to sing, dance, do gravures and meet with her fans. However, it was also true she could attend school more often now, which she gladly did. Being an idol was great and satisfying (although immensely tiring), but now that she had friends and a boyfriend, Kanon sometimes missed being just a normal girl. Walk to school everyday. Attend the same boring classes everyday. Hang out with everyone everyday. It didn't have to be long. A few weeks: just enough time to get used to it before she had to go back to being an idol. Kanon knew she'd be allowed a total break from her idol duties soon due to the exams, but she doubted it would feel like normal schoolgirl days, if Eri's complaints about studying were any indication.
Still, she couldn't complain. Not only she now could attend school (sometimes), but also she could meet with Keima (sometimes). Oh, how she yearned for the exams to be over already! Then she'll be able to spend the rest of her break with Keima-kun. Her chest become warm and her cheeks colored at the thought of that.
Things with Keima-kun were going great. Kanon tried to remain objective. She knew it'd probably look different if they were around each other for longer periods of time. She also knew that her happiness were influenced by that she never had something like that before. Being with Keima-kun was nice before, but now it was much better. And as much as Kanon wanted to say it it was all on a platonic level, she would be lying. Of course, her feelings for the boy were on a platonic level. She could feel her heart beating faster around him. She enjoyed his presence. She loved talking to him. She loved the little things and going on dates (as rare as it was).
However, while being with Keima on a platonic level was amazing... on a physical level it was simply exhilarating.
Once again, Kanon wasn't objective about this. She never had a boy kiss her like that. She was pretty certain they weren't doing anything beyond what normal teens their age were allowed or expected to do, yet still Keima managed to find spots on her body that she never paid attention too. If him patting her head felt nice, then him weaving his hands through her hair felt great. She sometimes wondered if she was sensitive by nature. Or maybe it was because of what she felt for him? Or maybe she wasn't anything special and it was all him. Anyway, the bottom line was that, while Kanon made sure to spend a lot of their time talking and doing other stuff, she never shied away from a make-out session.
She just remembered to lock the damn door this time.
Like that February started and the time for studying would soon be upon them. Still, Kanon had something special planned for her last high-school idol event. On the 13th of February she had took the afternoon off and secretly worked, with Mari's supervision, on the home-made chocolate, trying to made the sweet taste as mild as she could. The next day, on the 14th, she had given Keima that chocolate. She kinda planned to do it privately, but thanks to one of Eri's clueless comments she was forced to do it by the lockers. A lot of curious eyes watched as she asked Keima to accept her gift.
As embarrassing as the event was, it turned out to be full success... until Yui appeared with her chocolate and forced it on Keima. Of course, it wasn't just Yui. Kanon heard or directly witnessed Keima received chocolates from Chihiro, Ayumi, Tsukiyo, Shiori and Minami. Unexpectedly, Kanon noticed one of their classmates, the one with a side ponytail, fiddle with her bag when Keima received another chocolate. She didn't see the girl do anything, but Keima told her later he had found anonymous chocolate in his locker. Kanon didn't mind any of that: all of the chocolates were obligatory (and Chihiro mentioned hoping to get twice the worth in meatbuns in return on the White Day)... except for Yui's. The urge to gave the drummer a taste of her stun guns had never been stronger.
However, Kanon wasn't done with the Valentines yet. First, she had asked Keima out on a date in the afternoon. Second, she left school in the middle of the day to get to her last concert before her study-for-the-finals break. During the concert she made sure to dedicate her "Vale Vale Valentine" song to Keima and pour all her soul into singing it. Needless to say, the afterwards date had been successful as well.
She was overall very happy with how her and Keima's relationship progressed and they had as much privacy and public's understanding as their circumstances allowed. They understood each other better too and were more comfortable in each other's presence. Of course, it wasn't perfect. As much as Kanon didn't want to be a bother, the fact that Yui might still be a problem, made the idol too pushy at times. Keima didn't suddenly stop being a bit insensitive game nerd neither. Thus, they irritated each other slightly from time to time, but Kanon brushed it off as normal.
Honestly, the source of the biggest problems in their relationships were outside of it in the form of the other girls. The enemy number one was of course Yui. Most of the time Kanon told herself it was stupid and there was nothing to worry about. Other times she couldn't help but feel jealous. She didn't mind the others meeting Keima when she was around, but she'd rather not leave him with a gaggle of girl if she could help it. That made Kanon wonder, more than once in fact, if Keima was jealous of her fans. True, a lot of them were girls admiring her, people older than her and small children... but there were also countless teenage boys. Boys who wanted to be close to her as her fans or more. She decided to ask Keima about that someday.
Besides, it was not the time to think about that as February neared its end and the final high-school exams loomed close. Like it or not, Kanon had to put her idol job on hold and get to study. She was meeting Keima more often now, but unfortunately, it was almost exclusively education-focused, especially since Eri was often with them as well.
And it wasn't just Eri. As expected, study groups formed and it would've gone out of control quickly if it weren't for Kusunoki Kasuga. Kanon didn't know how had the martial artist learned or why did she care, but the fact of the matter was that she had intervened and made sure Keima's time was not monopolized.
All in all, Kanon was glad, because even with the girls under control, the preparations for the exams were hectic. No-one took the exams lightly, but there were also girls not very concerned with their final results (like Sumire or Nanaka). However, others were usually either very serious or forced into studying by their parents. This was also one of the very rare times when the circle of girls surrounding Keima caused more harm then good. In some weird ways, the more panicky girls (like Urara) started to affect the others, who in turn affected the first girls back, feeding each other and creating a snowball effect. In the following week Kanon had consumed unhealthy amount of coffee. Keima had told her that Haqua complained Eri asked her to take the exam disguised as her. Shiori barely left the library and they heard story of Mio throwing up from stress, too many energy drinks and too little food. Even Nanaka stopped being chill and could be seen focusing over her textbooks with furrowed brow and biting her pencil, her eyes indicating she didn't get a wink of sleep last night.
For Kanon it was even worse. Maybe it was the importance of the final exams. Maybe it was fact that she had been stabbed during the exams a year and a half ago. Or maybe it was all the girls asking for another hour of Keima's tutoring, but Kanon was becoming stressed in a way that her idol career did not prepare her for.
(* * *)
Finally, the day of the first exam came. Kanon was walking with Keima and Eri towards the school in the morning. The idol was rather nervous, her hand laced with her boyfriend's. Keima himself was not nervous, but he was tired: having to help others intensely had this kinda effect even on him. It also didn't help that Keima wasn't best at tutoring people. Eri looked the worst, however, walking with her head downcast as if she was approaching a scaffold.
"Hey," they heard a voice and turned to see Ayumi walking up to them, followed by Chihiro.
"I'm sorry, I'm late," the runner breathed out after the greetings, "I had to make sure that Chi wouldn't sleep in."
"I didn't as you can see," the band leader complained as if offended, before smiling in her usual way. She was the only one in a positive mood, but Kanon wasn't sure if it was a mask. Or maybe Chihiro just chilled out to stop herself from going mad. Well, Kanon thought, at least one of us will be sane after the week is done. Kanon shook her head. She shouldn't think like that. Graduating from high school was one of her long-term desires. She had studied hard for it. All of them had. There was no point in worrying now. They just had to go there and do it.
"Everyone, let's do our best!" Kanon smiled and raised her hand up, trying to cheer them up. After all, that was her job as an idol: cheering up people all over the country. Her heart warmed up as she saw the girls all perk up and answer. Even Keima gave her a small smile.
(* * *)
Kanon wasn't sure why, but for some reason she didn't expect a crowd of students in front of the school with a giant "Good luck on your tests, Kanon-cha~n!" banner in front of them. It was a welcome distraction though, because as soon as the idol was seated in front of her exam papers her nervousness was back with full force.
I'm not prepared for this, she thought. She wasn't stupid. She wasn't lazy. She had a ton of stage experience and has seen enough paranormal stuff to fill the plot of several movies. She had grown in many ways, but none of that could prepare her for a battle with the piece of paper in front of her.
I should've studied more, she thought as she looked around. Unusually, no-one was looking her way: everyone was focused on the exams in front of them. Everyone was determined. And then she saw Keima glance at her. And he smiled. It wasn't the first time Kanon saw him smile, of course, but they didn't meet often and Keima wasn't smiling often either, so it was still refreshing each time she saw him do it.
Kanon sent back a smile that was meant only for him and turned to her paper again.
I have no time for this, she thought. I'm not a genius who can finish a test in half an hour. I need all the time, so I can't waste it on worrying. Her family was counting on her. Her many friends and countless fans were counting on her. And, most importantly, her boyfriend was counting on her. This wasn't the time to worry, she reaffirmed as she took her pen and pursed her lips in determination.
It was time to kick that final exam's butt!
(* * *)
"Man, for a moment I thought the prez would be talking forever," Chihiro complained as the group exited the auditorium in the middle of the crowd of other students and headed for the school gate. It was March and the annoying weeks of studying were already a memory. Now everyone's mind was not on exams or university, but in the now: on the graduation ceremony they just finished.
"They should make Shiori-san the student council president," Eri said. Now that exams were over she was back to her usual optimistic and bubbly self, glad that she'll never ever ever have to study for exams again.
"Poor girl wouldn't be able to utter a word in front of the entire school," Chihiro noticed.
"And if she would, she would prepare so much text that we'd be sitting there for a week," Ayumi added, "besides I know far better candidates," she turned to her side where Keima and Kanon were walking. The gamer looked at her as if she had a screw loose.
"Kanon barely can attend the school, what makes you think anyone sane would consider her a candidate for school council president?"
Kanon giggled. "I think Ayumi didn't mean me," she told Keima.
"You mean me?" Keima said. "That's even more ridiculous."
Kanon shook her head. "A year ago, sure, but now? I wouldn't be so sure," she said.
"Nii-sama would be a really great president!" Eri agreed as if it was obvious.
"Actually, I have to agree with otamega here," Chihiro chipped in, "if he was a president, he wouldn't let any girl enroll unless she was a cardboard cut-out, an alien, a sorceress or at the very least dyed her hair blue."
"Oi!" Keima looked at the guitarist angrily as everyone laughed. Kanon laughed as well. She was in a really good mood. The exams and the stress associated with them were over. She was still in the middle of her break from idol duties, so no stress on that front either. And most importantly, she had still a few days off with her favorite stress reliever in the form of her boyfriend next to her. She smiled as she realized that another of her dreams came true.
She was able to become an idol.
She was able to get together with Keima.
She was able to graduate from high school.
The school gate was occupied by a chaotic mass of students and their parents. The spot by the school sign was the most crowded, as everyone wanted to take a picture with it. One person in the crowd started to wave at them when she saw them approach.
"Keima! Eri!" Mari called them together.
Of course what followed was a rather long series of pictures as Mari was adamant to immortalize the moment. She started with small pictures with just Keima and Eri, then including Kanon and then more and more people.
"Get closer together!" Mari said, trying to fit everyone into the frame, "you can embrace Kanon, Keima, she's your girlfriend!" she looked into her camera, "Ayumi, move to the left! And someone bring Shiori to the front!"
(* * *)
Unfortunately, not everything about the day worked as they had originally wanted. Everyone was hyped for a big get-together, but luck wasn't on their side. Hinoki wasn't able to find time to travel to Japan and Minami was on vacation with her family. Then they tried to make an arrangement for week or two later, but this collided with more people's plans as Kanon had to go back to work and Nanaka already had booked airplane tickets to France to visit her family. "This sucks!" Chihiro commented once they realized it wouldn't work and Kanon had to agree. Oh well, it's not the end of the world, she thought. They'd get another chance. That being said, while the original plan was a no-go, they still could do something in a smaller group.
"Karaoke time!" Chihiro announced to the group once the pictures were over.
And that's how the gang found themselves in a booked private karaoke room. It has been planned for quite some time, but Shiori was kept in the dark until the exams were done. She had the time to mentally prepare herself, though judging by her expression, it was clear she'd bolt to the furthest and quietest side of the room as soon as possible. However, Shiori wasn't the only one kept in the dark. The graduation happened on the 1st of March, two days before Kanon's 18th birthday and everyone secretly prepared the karaoke party to double as a birthday party, with balloons hanging from the ceiling a cake prepared beforehand.
The group consisted of Kanon, Keima, Eri, Ayumi, Chihiro, Tenri, Shiori, Kusunoki, Nanaka, Sumire, Mio, Tsukiyo, Yui, Urara and as surprising as it was, Haqua and Jun. However Chihiro's ambition to bring Rimyuel and Nikaidō failed, but the brown-haired girl vowed to bring them around someday yet!
The karaoke party started by girls trying their voices with various cover songs like Chihiro singing "Dang Dang, I'm curious about it" from Oishinbo or Eri and Kanon performing "Assemble Insert" together. Haqua did surprisingly well when performing "dis". The interesting point came when Shiori somehow mustered her courage and sang "Raison d'être". It was then that Eri remarked that Shiori's voice reminded her of one of anime voice actress. Quick goggle search proved that the actress in question was Kana Hanazawa. Then the party turned into comparing their voices with professional voice actors. Some speculated that Chihiro's must have been secretly leading a double life as Kana Asumi. Some thought Haqua was talented enough to pass as Saori Hayami. And everyone decided Eri could not only sound as Kanon, but her voice sounded remarkably like Kanae Itō's.
Keima also tried his hand at the karaoke. He wasn't a singer, as many of them here, but Kanon thought he did fairly well, even if exaggerated his voice a bit. Eri applauded his performance, while Chihiro claimed he sounded like "a crow in pain".
The next point of the show was Kanon performing a mini-concert, especially her "Sakura-colored Graduation" song fitting the occasion perfectly.
It was a very enjoyable afternoon, especially for Kanon who got to enjoy singing, being with her friends and being with Keima at the same time. Maybe the last part wasn't perfect as many girls tried to get Keima's attention, but Kanon couldn't blame them: some of them will be going to universities, so it was the last time they'll be able to hang out with Keima for a while. True, Keima might not enjoy crowds and karaokes, but he was still here, taking a part in group activities. Now, without his console it was difficult to tell he was a shunned nerd, the only thing visibly distinguishing him from a normal teenager was the number of females around him. He had certainly grown and this made Kanon proud.
Even the sight of Yui trying to get closer to Keima didn't make Kanon worry. In anything it made her feel bad for the cross-dresser. Keima, Kanon, Eri, Chihiro, even Mari. Neither of them was able to resolve things when it came to Yui. The unexpected half-resolution came in the form of Yui's mother and the drummer was already enrolled in one of Japan's more prestigious universities. It certainly wouldn't be easy for the girl, but it should help her make her own way in life.
All of them needed to do that.
(* * *)
And this was how they high school days ended. For those who entered university the studying days continued albeit differently. For some, like Keima or Sumire, it meant more time they could invest in their work and hobbies. Keima in particular continued his streaming career, but he also started to research the gaming industry more. His goals were not yet clear, but it was obvious he was figuring out what he wanted to do in life eventually.
It wasn't that much different for Kanon. Once the graduation was done, she was back to her idol career, but she also understood she couldn't be an idol forever. She wondered how much time she had left. She was 18 now. Could she still be an idol when she was 40? Most idols were expected to retire at 25 or 30 tops. But Kanon knew her situation was different. She had started as a traditional idol, instead of the modern one, she had risked a lot and she had succeeded. Still, it would end someday and one of the few things Kanon was certain about is that she'd need education, though she wasn't sure what she'd want to study. She'd have to look into that sometime in the near future.
For now, she had more immediate concerns. Her fans have followed her throughout her high school exam period and while it was an important point for many of her fans, it wasn't true for everyone. The income of new fans has also considerably lessened, more so than anticipated by her staff.
Her resting period was done. It was time to get back to work.
(* * *)
There was a soft ding-dong sound as the elevator door opened and Keima walked into the corridor, heading for the familiar apartment, eyes glued to his console. He knocked on the door and waited, but there was no response. Kanon probably had fallen asleep again. He couldn't blame her. She was working too much lately. This was also one of the reason why the majority of their rendezvous happened here. In Café Grandpa Eri would never let Kanon rest. His hyperactive sister was at first happy her school work was over, but soon started to regret it. Learning to take over the café went alright, but now that Eri didn't attend classes she was also not able to meet with Chihiro and Ayumi nearly as often as she did before and she didn't take that very well. Thus, most of her attention turned to Keima, Haqua (who was now a regular at Café Grandpa) and, when possible, Kanon.
Thus, Keima and Kanon mostly met at her apartment. Keima also didn't have school anymore and his streaming job didn't require him to be up early, so more than once he ended up staying till morning. Mari didn't mind but warned Keima to stay safe. When he reminded her he had Kanon guarded, Mari just groaned before putting a small package in his hand. When Keima realized what it was he glared at his mother, still, she forced him to take it. It was then when Keima decided to never as much as kiss Kanon in front of Mari. God knows what his mother would insinuate next.
Keima unlocked the door and entered the apartment.
"I'm here," he announced but received no answer. He looked around, but Kanon was not there. That's weird, he thought as he took his phone and emailed his idol girlfriend. The answer came in Kanon-patented record time.
Sorry. Had unplanned staff meeting. Should be done soon. Love, Kanon.
That calmed Keima down. Kanon was safe, though Keima doubted the additional hours spent at the studio would help with the idol's sleeping time. He put away his backpack, lied on the bed and started playing his PFP. He waited for around 20 minutes when he got another email.
Meeting's done. Going home.
Keima furrowed his brow. Similar to the "mind-reading" he did with Shiori, he had somewhat learned to decipher Kanon's mood from her emails. He couldn't quite place it, but something seemed off and it wasn't just the lack of the usual closing words Kanon liked to use.
Okay, I'm waiting.
After another 10 minutes, he heard the sound of the main door opening and Kanon walked in.
"Hey," Keima said as he put his console away and stood up from the bed.
"Hey," Kanon replied, her eyes obscured by her hair. As he expected something was off. Usually, at that point Kanon would be either happy to see him or tired, but nothing more. This time, however, there was a definite slump to her posture and Keima could practically feel a heavy aura.
"What's wrong?" he asked directly, not going to let any issues fester. Was Kanon doubting herself again? "Do you have to go for another tour or something?"
"I should..." Kanon said slowly, "but I'm not sure it'd help."
"What do you mean?" Keim was more than concerned at this point. He cupped her chin to raise it, so he could see her face. He half-expected for Kanon to resist or slap his hand away, but she didn't. When her face was up she looked at him. To confuse him further, the look on her face wasn't that of sadness. It wasn't anger or disappointment either. At least not directly. It was as if she was torn between feeling conflicting emotions.
Before he could react to that Kanon moved forward and hugged him, burying her head in his chest. Keima didn't mind her using him as a shoulder to cry on, but Kanon didn't start to sob or sniff. There were no tears. Kanon's gaze didn't seem sad or depressed just now. It seemed... empty... powerless...
Lost...
Keima embraced her and ran his hand up and down her back, trying to console her, though he wasn't sure if it was helping. They stayed like that for some time, Kanon still in her outside clothes and Keima in his shirt, his mind running in all directions. He rocked them softly, suddenly not feeling very useful. Without knowing what was wrong he couldn't do much. Though he could sense Kanon relaxed a bit in his embrace. He was her bedrock, her lighthouse in the darkness... but that was because of what Kanon thought of him, working without him having to do anything. It was helpful, but he also wanted to help her with his own skills.
Finally, Kanon pulled back a bit, but still looked unsure. She opened her mouth to speak, but Keima put his finger on her lips.
"How about you take a shower first and change into something more comfortable before we talk?"
Kanon was motionless for a moment before she nodded. Five minutes later Keima could hear the sound of the shower coming from the bathroom. He waited patiently. He had half the mind to email Okada, but he decided against it. It was quite a while before the splash of the water turned into a gentle pitter-patter and died down. After that Kanon had to dry herself and change, so she didn't emerge out of the bathroom immediately. Still, it was taking more than he had anticipated.
At last, the door opened and Kanon walked into the bedroom. She was wearing some unremarkable white T-shirt and some equally unremarkable pants. They were the blandest, plainest and the most boring clothes Keima had ever seen her wearing, but somehow it looked quite well on her. Maybe it was because it was something new, a side of Kanon Keima rarely got to see. Or maybe it was because it allowed Kanon's natural beauty to shine, not fancy clothes, no makeup. He could see it. Her fair face. Her short hair with those ridiculous cute antennas. Her swan-like neck. Her big eyes. Her figure, both curvy and slender. She was a pretty girl and he could see it even through her eyes were still blank, even if a bit less so.
She sat down on the bed next to him.
"Are you feeling better?" he asked. Kanon nodded her head, though she wasn't looking at him. He placed his hand on hers.
"If you don't want to, we don't-"
"My popularity has dropped," Kanon started.
Keima wasn't exactly surprised. The stabbing proved what under-performance could cause and a break due to the final exams wasn't something to underestimate either. Moreover, as Kanon's popularity rose, there has to be a peak somewhere, a peak that once reached, couldn't be supported and the popularity would drop. Thus, he understood it wasn't a small or one-time drop, otherwise, it wouldn't affect Kanon that much. But there was something wrong with "beyond the peak" hypothesis: Kanon was too young and too loved for it to happen now. And recently she had finally managed to release the galge game her and Keima had been working so hard on and, while critics obviously didn't fully understand the genius behind the game, it was welcomed warmly by the market. Okada was already talking about a sequel.
And most important of all, the idol's reaction was unusual for such an event. For such a problematic issue she was looking weirdly bitter-sweet. There had to be more to it.
"Go on."
Kanon was quiet for a while. "Do you remember my dream?" Kanon asked. "The reason I sing? I mean aside from wanting to get noticed?"
"You want to make people happy," Keima said without hesitation, "brighten their day. Be their shining light. You want your music to reverberate in people's hearts."
Kanon nodded.
"I..." she started weakly before she cleared her throat, "I kinda wanted to reach out to everyone."
"To everyone," Keima repeated, "you mean... like you wanted to go international?"
That wasn't something Keima considered a good thing. As good as Kanon was, the world was a vast place and the non-Japanese audience wouldn't be able to fully understand the idea of Japanese idol, especially a traditional one. Not to mention that Kanon would have to spend a lot of time outside of Japan.
That last point affected him more than he expected it to.
To his relief, Kanon shook her head.
"Some of my fans are leaving," she said, "and new ones are not arriving nearly as fast as before."
"There will always be people who won't admire you, some people will be like that even if they're attending the concerts," Keima tried to reason, "people sometimes like only a couple of your songs and-"
"It's not about my songs being not enough," Kanon interrupted him, "it's not about my idol work being not enough..." she paused for a moment as if the truth was too bizarre for her to voice, "it's about my songs... my idol work... they're too good."
"Excuse me?" Keima asked after a second of processing this. This didn't make any sense. Her songs were too good? Was Kanon's agency demanding her work more because of that? But why the popularity drop then?
"I have been walking through a park once on my day off," Kanon said, looking into space, "and I saw a little girl, maybe 5 years old, singing quietly, pretending she was an idol. She was holding an imaginary microphone and had a yellow ribbon in her hair. She was singing my song. Pretending she was me... That girl might want to be an idol one day," Kanon.
"That girl cannot be older than 8 now," Keima said, still not understanding the problem.
"Yes," Kanon agreed, "but others are older."
Keima was quiet for a few seconds and then Kanon looked at him with a sad smile.
"Remember that time when you're gaming site revived the dating sim industry?" she asked and Keima nodded. He had an idea where this was going.
"I didn't like some of my idol senpais," Kanon said quietly, "but I never thought it'd be my idol kōhais who'd actually cause me problems," her smile got even more bitter-sweet, "I think I understand my senpais better now..."
"You mean you have competition?" Keima asked.
Kanon nodded. "The popularity drop was small at first, but it persisted, so my staff didn't underestimate it and started to search for the cause... and they traced it to two rising idols."
"I see," Keima said. It explained some of it, but not everything, "forgive me, but is your staff really sure that can seriously threaten you in the long run?"
"Well, those two rising idols were several months ago," Kanon finally looked at him fully, "now there's five of them... and those two are already being more popular than me in their prefectures."
Keima didn't know what to say, but it wasn't necessary as Kanon continued. "People always said my career grew out in a flash... I guess I'm not unique in that regard... and the others are not alone. They have their own agencies and managers... Okada-san believes they've prepared for my exam period and released songs when I couldn't perform in order to easily steal some of my popularity... I wanted people to admire me. I wanted to give them hope and dreams. I wanted them to believe they could be like me," Kanon said, still the same smile on her lips, "it seems I have succeeded..."
"I'm sorry," Keima said sincerely, "I'm sure it won't be so bad though." he added trying to cheer her up, "Okada might be too strict, but she certainly has the experience, knows people and this entire business. The same goes for your staff too. The others don't have such a team... and most importantly," his tone made her look at him, "you're you. I believe in you. You're your own person who forged her own light. Sure, those other idols might steal some of your fans and some of your popularity, but they will never be able to catch up to you. They might be good. They can be stars dotting the sky. But they can never shine as bright as you. Because you're the biggest star in the sky. You're light is so strong that night turns to day when you rise. You're the sun."
"Yeah," Kanon answered, "I know..."
This surprised Keima. He didn't expect those words to make Kanon instantly happy, but such a weak reaction was not anticipated. Is was as if his words weren't relevant. It was as if...
"It's not your popularity or income you're worried about," he stated, not asked.
Kanon was quiet for a few seconds.
"I guess I am a bit worried..." Kanon said slowly. "I know popularity is important... and fickle... but I'm not worried that they'll catch up to me anytime soon... In a way, I'm happy for them, happy that I helped them reach for their dreams..."
Keima waited for a bit in silence, before he spoke. "But..."
"But I wanted to be the one to help everyone!" Kanon suddenly shouted, her face exposed and Keima could see the seeds of tears in her eyes. Keima leaned back and Kanon realized her outburst, so she downcast her eyes again.
Keima finally understood.
"You want to make everyone into your fans," he said, "but you're worried that you won't be able to do it. Even if other idols will be traditional like you, even if they'll be as helpful to society as you... you still want to be the only one to do that."
On the one hand, it didn't seem like something serious. Some might even think it was trivial, like the dozens of things Kanon used to contact him about so long ago... but on the other hand, Keima knew better. It might not be important to others, but it was important to Kanon.
The idol was quiet, face hidden from the light, one of her hands on her lap and the other one embracing her own waist.
"Yeah," she admitted, "does it make me a bad person?"
"Why would it?" Keima asked. "You wouldn't be doing it for fame. You'd be doing it for others."
"It's egoistic," Kanon said.
"Egoism is just another form of love," Keima told her, "everyone needs to love themselves. To a certain extent. Sure, you might've been a bit too egoistic a long time ago, but you've gone past that..."
"Thanks to you," she said before pausing for a moment, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear, "what should I do?"
"You don't need to ask me," Keima told her, "your fans, Okada, me... we're not here to decide that for you. You're your own person, with your own light. You should do what you want to do."
"But... but I want to be the best idol the world ever had!"
"You already are," Keima smiled, "but if you want more... then go for it."
"But the others-"
"Don't worry about the others," he told her, hands on her shoulders, making her look at him again, "everyone deserves their chance and you're not done with your chance yet. Because this is who you are. If you do what you love, what you believe in, you'll succeed and enjoy that path... If you give up or become half-assed now you'll never be able to forgive yourself for abandoning your fans."
Kanon digested his words for a moment.
"What if I can't reach out to everyone?"
Keima shrugged. "Even I can't play all the games and save all the heroines, even if I'd like to. Still, that never stopped me from trying."
"And what if I fail?" Kanon asked. "What if my number of fans plummets to zero? What then?"
"You can be a singer. A voice actress. A movie actress even. You have a talent for that," he told her, "besides your number of fans will never reach zero."
"How can you be sure about that?"
"Because even if everyone else will stop, at least one of your fans will remain," Keima told her
Kanon laughed. "Eri... of course."
"Not Eri," Keima told her, "me."
Kanon paused for a second, looking at him.
"Really?" she tilted her head. "But Eri knows the lyrics of all my songs."
"I do too."
"Then what line does 'Snow from my eyes' begin with?" she asked.
"Rains falls on the monochrome town lined with umbrellas," Keima quoted immediately, his eyes challenging.
"Okay... that was an easy one," Kanon thought for a moment, wanting to prove him wrong, "what is my last line of 'Pink Décor Motion'?"
This one was tricky, it was song in a duo with someone else and the final line wasn't just Kanon's
"Pleaseee... the last words are 'With requests sprinkled with heart marks'... and the last words on your solo part are 'our dreams are in full bloom'," he said,
Kanon looked at him with wide eyes. Then she started to hum.
"Uraha Love," Keima recognized the melody immediately.
Kanon patted her fingers on her night stand.
"Youth paradise... I can do this all day," he added.
At this point Kanon's jaw was unhinged.
"H-how?" no that wasn't the important question. "Why?"
"You'd be surprised how many of your fans memorize your songs."
"B-but you're different."
"How am I different?"
"Others depend on me. I help people see the light, fight their worries," she tried to explain, before finding a good analogy, "it's similar to your runaway spirit hunting. In a way I was filling the gaps in people's hearts," she said. She never thought about it in that way before though.
"Then what about the gap in my heart?" Keima asked.
It took several seconds for Kanon to try processing that. Try being the operative word.
"W-what do you mean?"
Keima didn't blame her at all. It was not easy to realize, especially for him, especially with how rarely they met. But, as weird as it was, this rarity of meetings helped. Each time it kept Keima and Kanon away from each other long enough for any seeds of arguments or fight to cool down and disappear. It let them meet bit by bit and get used to each other. It gave their relationship time to mature, so gradually that Keima didn't realize it until when it was already done. But he could see it now. The way he missed Kanon when she was away. The way he appreciated when they could meet. The way she bit her lower lip cutely. The way she got as close as possible to him when Yui was nearby. The was he was annoyed when Eri interrupted them.
Their relationship was always defined by distance. The physical distance that often kept them away. But just like during Yui's conquest, the same distance made their minds think of each other. It drew their feelings together. Their souls were attracted to each other. The further away they were from each other the stronger the connection became.
"I mean there was a gap in my heart," Keima said his hand rising to cup her cheek, "a gap I didn't even know I had... a gap that you have filled, Kanon... Please, don't change who you are. Persevere and believe in yourself, just as I believe in you. And this time, if you can't do it for everyone else, do it for me... I love you, Kanon."
Kanon opened her mouth, but words died at her tongue. It didn't matter though, because as soon as Keima said it, his lips descended onto hers in a deep loving kiss.
Kanon didn't know how long it lasted. All that she knew was that she was feeling light-headed. Her lips were tingling. Here heart was singing. And Keima loved her.
She flung her arms over his neck and pushed him back, kissing him with all her might, not caring if they'll fall out of the bed.
Keima loved her!
Finally, they separated, both out of breath, both of their cheeks flushed.
"I love you too, Keima-kun!" she gasped out. The warmth inside of her heart expanded, filling her up and growing further as if it was about to get out of her body. As if-
"Freaking finally!" a voice interrupted as the half-happy half-annoyed face appeared on a nearby mirror.
"A-Apollo?" Kanon asked half-surprised and half-annoyed. Interruptions from Eri could be avoided, but Kanon couldn't prevent the pink-haired goddess appearing at weird times.
"I've been waiting for that for weeks now!" Apollo exclaimed loudly before she glared at Keima. "You, how dare you make Kanon wait for so long!"
"Wait," the idol said, "what do you mean you waited?"
"Katsuragi confessed to you when you were asleep the other day! I heard it, but I kept quiet about it," Apollo announced proudly, arms over her chest, apparently happy that she managed to keep a secret."
"Really?" Kanon asked before she turned by to Keima. "It's bad manners to keep a lady waiting like that."
"The lady was working really hard lately," Keima defended, "the boy didn't want to disturb her."
"Is that so?" Kanon clearly didn't believe him. "Well, the lady will be working even harder from now on," she paused before adding, "the lady wonders what else did the boy do when she was asleep?"
"The boy will not tell," Keima answered, "his lips are sealed."
"Then the lady has no choice, but to unseal them... and has perfect means for it," this time she was the one to descend her lips on top of him and let Keima fill her senses, the rest of the world, including a certain goddess, forgotten for a while.
(* * *)
Well, we have a breakthrough, guys and girls!
Keima finally said it! :)
Though it isn't perfect as Kanon clearly has some competition in the business now, despite that she'd like to be the Japan's only idol. I guess we'll have to see how this will turn out for our hero and heroine.
For another thing, Kanon finally managed to graduate high-school despite all the stress... and Mari got a chance to fangirl over her son having so many graduation pictures! :D
Also, we got to see the karaoke party where even Shiori and Keima got to sing! I thing the choice of the mentioned songs and voice actors was very interesting as well. Any opinions on that?
And we can't forget about Valentines event as well. :)
Oh, sorry for the chapter being unrealistic... with Apollo managing to keep a secret and all. :P
As side notes: the spelling of "goggle" is intentional. The small 5-year-old girl Kanon mentions is a reference to the girl who appears in anime when Kanon walks through a park.
Also the reference in this chapter is brought to you by Pokemon. :P
As always, I want to thank you very much for all your support, including the reviews, which are simply amazing. Here are the replies to the most recent ones:
Sir Sleeps-a-lot: it's alright, you still made it in time and I'm always very happy to read your reviews :). I'm very glad that you think so highly of my writing style, portrayal of characters and their interactions. That means I made a good job and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Yup, Chihiro's a troll... at least she is whenever she can get on Keima's nerves a bit ;). I'm not a slice-of-life specialist (you're better at it), but I'm happy that "shougi player moon lover and valedictorian devil walk into a cafe" scene worked :). I guess the biggest compliment overall might be the one about Kanon-Keima lovey-dovey time. I rarely (like... never before?) get to write something so steamy and graphic, so I'm relieved it was well-received :). Yes, Keima needs to man up and buy a better glasses, so he can see it, so he and Kanon can get down to putting hickeys in other plac-*gets tased by Kanon* Gaaah! Damn, I can't seem to control my own characters T.T. Thank you very much for your review! It means a lot for me. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well! :)
jargax: Thank you very much for your review. Glad you liked the chapters. And Ayumi vs. Eri race needs to happen :).
DarkDrawerJ: I'm very glad you enjoyed the chapter. Too bad I rarely get to write that kinda fluff with Keima being Keima.
Big Bad Beowulf: hello my dear reviewer :). Yes, the chapter was sweet and I think it's a sweetness Keima likes too. Yup, Eri is an anti-steam agent, unfortunately... Yup, Nanaka doesn't know where to stop :P. I hope you enjoyed that chapter as well.
Red Glasses: thank you very much, glad my ideas are diverse and innovative enough :). To be honest I'm not sure why I didn't do that streaming thing before. Yay, for the hickeys! Who knows... we only know that no-one from the group besides Keima, Tenri and Kaori has ever talked to Kaori for all we know. It's alright, it was nice ted talk :). I don't think I know who Sora is though.
William F Somebody: thank you very much for this detailed review. I don't even know how to start responding to it. Well, Apollo might or might not have anything to do with that blizzard :P. It's interesting that so many people are okay with Apollo helping Kanon with spells. Great comment on Nanaka, Tsukiyo and Haqua :). And Haqua definitely needs to win more. Yup, everyone's changing. Well, as you read in this chapter, the get-together didn't happen as it was supposed to... but we still got something. And maybe we'll get another chance :). Yeah, Ayumi's and Mio's fics were intimate and graphic, but not as much. There might be something in Kanon that makes her more naughty at times, but I wouldn't put it past Ayumi and Mio to get pretty naughty themselves ;). I guess we'll see that in the future :). I'm very happy that you think so highly of this entire series. Thank you very much :). As for the girls you asked about, we'll get to see. I hope I'll be able to write as many as possible. I think I responded to rest of your comments in PM. Thank you very much. I hope you liked this chapter as well.
ZelgadisGW: damn, that's good chapter title... why didn't I think of that :/. Now that I think about that stuff... you're totally right. I'm impressed at your appraisal of this chapter :). Something tells me you and Asami would find a common tongue :). Thank you very much.
Ghost Man: yeah, desk jobs and being a writer can suck a lot out of a person without the person even doing much. Heh, maybe that Eri suggestion isn't bad :P. Why would Haqua not get a turn on the orb? :P Lol, using Apollo's magic to help the hickeys? I didn't think of that. Thank you for giving me that idea. It was a great review. Thank you very much.
El Sasori69: hello again. I think you spelled "good idea" wrong there :P. Thank you for reviewing. I hope you liked the chapter. :)
Stay tuned for the next chapter! We're getting closer and closer to the ending of Kanon's story!
See you next time!