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Chapter 15: Turn For The Worst
As coming days played out, Rachel found herself reaccustomed with how natural she seemed to open up around Eddie. This was something she had never experienced with another, something she thought she would never search for and successfully find.
Undoubtedly, Eddie himself noted the night of Rachel's return from hospital as a significant one. A turning point amongst the aftermath of the fire, much later that particular evening, had found the pair wrapped up in one another; Rachel pouring her heart out to Eddie as she revealed the exact thought process behind her prior outburst.
It brought Eddie a breath of delight to see that currently, Rachel appeared far more carefree - the full extent of her breathtakingly beautiful smile on show as they laughed along with a game show on the TV.
Except, it was true to say Eddie's eyes weren't on the screen, rather, enraptured by Rachel and everything that encompassed her.
She could almost feel Eddie's eyes upon her features, Rachel was fairly certain that his gaze hadn't left her vicinity for the past ten minutes or more.
The realisation stole Rachel's breath away, which led to her being unable to suppress a broad grin - knowing she'd put it down to the programme should Eddie query it.
For now though, he realised, Rachel's own eyes seemed to be magnesting towards his - possibly sensing his stare, Eddie would imagine.
He was glad of their close proximity whilst their gazes locked, making it all too easy for Eddie to raise a hand, tucking a loose strand of hair behind Rachel's was much like he'd done countless times before.
"What are you looking at, Lawson?"
"I could ask you the same question, Mason."
Eddie loved the way she flushed a deep crimson, head ducking in an attempt to hide the change. He'd missed that, Eddie pondered.
His usual gesture following on from that, Eddie hooked a finger under Rachel's chin; suddenly realising how close they'd gotten - faces mere inches away as the pair had no complaints with sharing breath.
Eddie's thoughts trailed off, his brain incapable of focusing on anything other than the way he and Rachel simultaneously leant towards one another, lips meeting to begin something which commenced as relatively tender transferring into a heated exchange.
Rachel bit down on Eddie's bottom lip slightly, enjoying his groan which went hand-in-hand with that.
She was so lost in Eddie, so utterly wrapped up in the way he was making her feel that she didn't quite register his hands upon the buttons of her blouse. Rachel froze, halting Eddie's movements instantly as he pulled back, concern etched within his features.
"Rach? What is it?"
She had to be entirely honest with him, she knew. Wanted to be entirely honest.
"I think it's probably the only thing we haven't spoken about. But I," Rachel gestured towards the right side of her chest almost subconsciously, the pause giving her the opportunity to swallow down the rapidly enlarging lump in her throat, "my scar. You… you haven't seen it yet."
Nothing but understanding and pure love was present in Eddie's eyes, and Rachel found they were drawing her in once more.
Eddie was cursing himself for rushing their encounter, knowing now that slowing their movements down should have been a priority. He knew about the scar, he should've considered it first and foremost before Rachel's lips and body against his had begun to control his senses.
He was aware now that reassuring Rachel was more important than ever. He had to show her that the scar didn't matter to him; it was a mark of bravery, of pure selflessness.
"It doesn't change anything Rachel. You're special, nothing could change that."
Rachel felt as though she was gasping for air, inhaling sharply as at Eddie's words filled her mind. They were everything she had needed to hear in that moment, Rachel just had to comprehend her emotions which paralleled with that.
"Are you sure about that?"
Eddie had never been more sure of anything, "yes. Absolutely."
There was an uncertainty in the depths of Rachel's eyes, and it was then that Eddie realised maybe it was a case of showing her as well as telling her.
Eddie levelled his eyes with her, feeling as open and nervous as Rachel looked.
"It doesn't change anything. Trust me."
"Of course I trust you."
The words meant more to Eddie than he could ever express with words, choosing instead to mould their lips together, showing Rachel how sincere he was through the best way possible.
Rachel gasped as his lips left hers, not necessarily welcoming the loss of contact until it was perfectly substituted. Eddie trailed kisses across her jaw, once more shifting his hands to the front of Rachel's blouse.
"You're beautiful Rachel," he lifted his head, eyes locking with hers, "I wish you could see yourself the way I do."
This time, she didn't flinch or freeze, breath hitching as she put every ounce of trust her body held into the man she loved.
….
"You heard the doctor Rachel, you aren't ready to go back."
"And as I said to him, with all due respect, it's not my physical or emotional health that matters right now."
Eddie knew he was at a loss, knew that this day had been looming for a while. A week before the school year commenced, and Rachel was eager to be back along with the students. Even as that was her priority, that wasn't Eddie's. Rachel was above all else for him.
"Put yourself first for once, Rachel," he purposefully softened his tone, kneeling down in front of her where she sat on the sofa, taking a hold of her hands.
A flicker of something flashed across her expression, yet even as she clasped Eddie's hands in return, Rachel wasn't about to let her students down.
"How can I Eddie? I broke far too many promises last year. I intend to change that."
"That's not true. You've turned that school around. And in fairness, you did have a few distractions."
"Ones that I'm hoping won't make an appearance this year."
"We haven't heard anything from Stuart, or Melissa. It'll be fine."
Rachel sighed, unable to stop herself from smiling at Eddie's constant assuring presence, "what matters to me right now, is the school. I can't put my heart and soul into it whilst sitting at home."
"It's only a week or two Rachel. Just while you heal that bit more. And I'll be there, holding the fort."
She nodded, and without explanation Eddie knew that was more for her own benefit than his, "I know you will, I know that. It's just… not the same is it?"
"But before long it will be. Rachel, don't worry," he grinned lopsidedly, lightening the tone, "I'll make sure I'll bring you some paperwork back on a lunch time."
Eddie's comment had the desired effect, a giggle escaping Rachel's mouth as she began to look relaxed for the first time since they had delved into the conversation.
"Oh I bet you will."
There was a pause as Rachel linked her hands together around the back of Eddie's neck, absently thinking of all the days they'd spent together over the summer break. Most of the nights Eddie had slept round Rachel's, only returning home for a fresh lot of clothes or to check up on the post. Maybe, Rachel pondered, it was a topic she could visit. Finally bite the bullet and ask Eddie to move in with her properly.
"I'm going to miss you just as much as the school."
It was almost a whisper, Eddie noted, having to strain to hear the words but knowing he most certainly had.
"And I'll miss you. The place won't be the same without you."
Rachel felt herself gravitating towards him, the prospect of his lips on hers all of a sudden too tempting to push away.
Eddie melted into the kiss, before long pulling back as a flicker of a thought crossed his mind.
Foreheads resting together, he decided there was no time like the present, "so, does this mean we are officially going out now? With you missing me."
Rachel didn't think she'd ever felt so content, all worries of school and broken promises suddenly the last thing on her mind. Because Eddie was by her side - supporting her no matter what - and that meant everything would turn out just fine in the end.
Tilting her head, she couldn't help but humour him, the light in her eyes present before the fire returning.
"I suppose it does. I don't think I'd mind officially going out with you, Mr Lawson."
Eddie's grin was strikingly similar to Rachel's, he felt as though it would never falter, not whilst she was this close to him, happiness radiating from her features.
"Nor would I, Rach."
….
Distracted by Rachel's presence, whether that be consistent touches to his arm or just the way she would look at him from across the room, Eddie was pressed for time as he slipped on his shoes - knowing he couldn't be late for the first day back, especially as the acting head. Not that he would dispute this particular diversion in any way shape or form.
"I'm not sure I want you to go," Rachel popped her head around the living room.
He adored how open she had gotten to be with him, and that had only seemed to further once they both came to their senses and eventually moved Eddie into Rachel's, officially.
"I'll come and see you on lunch times, as promised with paperwork."
He couldn't resist crossing the room, encasing her upper arms in his.
"You will have duties at school Eddie," Rachel glanced towards his collar, playing with it affectionately before realigning her eyes with Eddie's.
"Okay, if the place isn't falling apart, then I will."
She shook her head with an edge of mock disapproval, "silly man."
Rachel laughed as she spoke, the most beautiful sound as Eddie liked to call it. He would never tire of hearing or seeing her infectious happiness.
"Now we both know you wouldn't change me for the world."
"Not at all. I really appreciate everything you're doing Eddie, thank you."
"Anything for you. Someone who I'm officially going out with."
Rachel's heart warmed, grin on the verge of splitting her face in half as Eddie referred to something which had become their inside joke.
She rose on her tiptoes to plant a quick kiss to Eddie's lips, both adults reluctant as they parted, bidding one another goodbye until lunchtime rolled around.
….
Counting down the hours until midday seemed to be Rachel's chosen activity, swapping her time between reading a book and watching the TV. Or more appropriately, daydreaming whilst watching the TV. It didn't seem as though her mind was planning on diverting from Eddie anytime soon.
As much as it pained Rachel not to be present on the first day of term - interacting with students, diving straight in to tackle any problems that came her way, even the paperwork; she missed - deep down, she knew that Eddie was right. Hordley showing his face, forcing Rachel to reveal her past to the entire student body continued to haunt her six weeks on, not to mention the fire: the way she recalled the flames licking all around her, heat engulfing her vicinity. She wasn't emotionally ready, or physically ready to go back to work, just as the doctor had pointed out. Yet those facts didn't hold back the longing Rachel had to get her life back on track, act as though that fateful day and Stuart Hordley really was a distant memory, rather than the here and now.
Rachel's brow furrowed automatically upon hearing the unmistakable sound of her door bell. Her initial thought was Eddie, yet what would possess him to knock? And one look at the clock told Rachel it was well before she was expecting him.
Ignoring the dizziness that seemed to accompany itself with standing, Rachel inhaled sharply, emerging onto the hallway with a hand to the wall.
Instantly, she cursed herself for not paying more attention. Because if she had done, Rachel would have recognised the dark hair, the cunning stance and tall build before she'd even swung the door open.
"Stuart," Rachel heaved deeply, knowing the fear in her tone was all too prominent. His was a name she'd wished never to utter again.
"Thought I'd pay you a visit, see how you're getting on after that terrible accident. Haven't you missed me, Amanda?"
"I want you to leave Stuart."
"No can do I'm afraid," in one swift movement, the barrier of the door between them was discarded, Stuart pushing his weight against it, backing Rachel against the wall.
She whimpered, unable to hold back the sound as bile rose in her throat, eyes centering upon the evil smirk spread across Stuart's mouth.
"What do you want, Stuart? Can't you see this is over? My past is no longer a secret."
His laugh echoed in her ears, taunting Rachel as she resisted the urge to slip her eyes shut and pretend this was just another scene to add to the long list of scenarios present in her nightmares.
"Oh this is far from over. You lost me my entire business. Now I need your help to start a new one."
Ice trickled down Rachel's spine, folding her lips inwards as realisation hit, "help you?"
She despised how vulnerable she sounded, longed to kick and scream with all her might, yet all fight was gone, replaced with an unyielding fear. This was a man who had ruined Rachel, deeply scarring her both mentally and physically.
"You'll supply me with five thousand pounds. That should be enough to get my new plans up and running."
Rachel tilted her head, an ounce of reality piercing through her brain, "and what exactly do you have against me now Stuart?"
"I'm sure I can find something up my sleeve," he took a deathly grip of Rachel' chin, ensuring that her eyes had no escape from the glare of his, "and if not, I'm sure ripping you away from your boyfriend will be a substantial enough threat."
Her mouth gaped open, closing again with the same speed as she made an attempt at comprehending Stuart's words. The mention of Eddie had lit a flame in Rachel, she couldn't - wouldn't - let any harm come to the only man who'd ever truly loved and cared for her.
Stuart however, had other ideas, pressing himself harder against Rachel, so much so his breath could be felt against her skin. Rachel almost screamed at the sensation, tears springing to her eyes as a result of this hold he had over her making a return.
"I'm not an idiot. I've told you before and I'll tell you again, I'd be blind not to see that you're obviously sleeping together."
A moment passed where Rachel paused, scanning Stuart's features as he awaited her response.
Even as internally, her brain was screeching the opposite, she couldn't do it, wouldn't bow down to him for a second time.
"I won't be doing anything more for you Stuart. You won't be receiving a penny. Now I think you need to leave."
For just a split second Rachel's mind tipped into overdrive, head spinning as she began to regret her bold statement. Stuart's hand seemed to automatically slip down from her chin, tightening around her throat as a substitute. Gasping for air was an uncomfortable reminder of the fire, and one look up to be met with Stuart's eyes pooled with anger, told Rachel the man was all too aware of the similarity.
His forehead pushed against hers, sneering as an eternity seemed to pass before he freed her neck, "well I'll expect we'll be seeing a lot more of one another then."
Even as Stuart turned on his heel, door slamming behind him, Rachel couldn't shake the sensation of his presence. She could smell nothing but his aftershave, feel nothing but his rough skin against hers, and worst of all, hear nothing aside from his chilling tone.
Eddie, the only person to halt the shaking rippling through her body was absent from her presence. The thought caused Rachel to freeze, her body melting temporarily as she locked the door firmly, wanting to shut herself away from the world with a similar attitude. She had been right; the Stuart Hordley ordeal most certainly wasn't over.