Notes: So this was...not the chapter I promised you all. It doesn't have the action like I said. If I put the action scene in here, the chapter would've ended up being like 14k. It also would've taken me a few more days to write it. In the end, I decided to cut it in half so I could give myself some respite to focus on my other works for a few days before coming back to this and writing what will be an exhausting action scene for me. I'm still planning it out in my end, although I have the end of the chapter fully in mind and I am freaking excited about it. I know we're all hyped about Bakugou vs Deku 2.0, but this chapter involved an equally important confrontation. Also, there are some things that Deku has been avoiding and I'm not letting him do that anymore. Also, if it sounds like Deku's not making complete sense, well, he's had someone digging around in his head for almost a year. I wouldn't either.
"A mentor enables a person to achieve. A hero shows what achievement looks like."
- John C. Mathers
When they stepped out of the warp gate, the first thing to strike Uraraka was how fresh the air smelled. She'd been locked in a building for at least three or four days without seeing the sun. Being out in the open, feeling the light breeze on her skin, and the heat of the summer air, was almost like a shock to the system. She was caught off guard to find that it was dusk, the sun setting behind the buildings. With dark clouds on the horizon, soaking up the last remaining rays of the sunlight, it was growing dark, but there were streetlights that kept the darkness at bay.
Upon walking to the mouth of the alley, Uraraka surveyed the area. It looked vaguely familiar. Uraraka could've sworn that she'd been here at least once, but it was hard to tell. She wasn't as strong as she should've been. In between getting dosed with that quirk inhibitor drug, the emotional turmoil, and not eating properly, she knew that she wasn't at the top of her game. Adrenaline had been building in her veins up until they'd crossed through the gate, but now, with the sounds of a sleepy city and lively bugs as background noise, she felt as if it had been sucked out of her.
What were they doing here? It was so...peaceful.
Deku was watching her with a pensive expression on his face as she looked around. "Do you know where we are?"
"I…" Uraraka's eyes landed on a medium height square building. It was tucked away behind some trees and there were a few other smaller buildings blocking its lower half, but a jolt of recognition shot through her. She paled and spun around to Deku. "You're not-"
"No, you don't need to worry about that," Deku interrupted softly, shaking his head. She thought he looked a little sad, but it was hard to tell. He didn't look pleased or upset or angry, but he wasn't entirely blank either. His face was smooth, maybe even a little tired, but all she could think was that it looked as soft as his voice sounded. "I'm not about to bring her into this."
Even if he couldn't feel sadness over this, Uraraka did and it threatened to swallow her whole. "Deku…"
"Besides, they moved her out of the city three days ago," Deku continued, injecting a little more strength in his voice and stance. He was trying to put on an act that none of this bothered him, but she could tell that it did by the way his eyes seemed to bounce off the building if he came close to looking at it. "I'm a little irritated that they didn't think to do it right away, but she's safe now and that's all that matters."
Safe. Uraraka bit her lip. Deku had once said that she would be safer with him, but that hadn't completely been the case. A villain had attacked her and Kyōmu had used Todoroki to threaten her. She'd been locked away like a doll, but now here she was on the outside with him, like they were going out for an evening stroll. They had done plenty of those before, especially after moving in together. When they got off work together and were tired, but didn't want to just stay home. She'd loved those little moments with him.
It almost felt like that now, but when she looked over at him again and saw his villain costume, her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach.
"Your mother…" Uraraka knew that she was walking on shaky ground right now. "It would devastate her to see you like this."
Deku turned away from her. This was the first time he had brought up his mother and she could tell that it was a very difficult and confusing subject. It had to have been a trigger for him, perhaps even one more difficult for Kyōmu to deal with than her. There was no way he could have managed to turn Deku against the one person who had always loved and encouraged him no matter what. She'd raised a sweet, loving, and loyal son who would do anything to protect everyone he could.
What would she think of him now? Uraraka could only imagine her heartbreak upon finding out what had happened to her kind boy. It had hurt her not to call Deku's mom right away and tell her what was going on, but they had hoped to put an end to it before that had to be done. Instead, things had spiraled out of control. Deku closed his eyes and flexed his fingers at his sides. He looked as if he might break down as well.
Instead, he took a breath and opened his eyes. "It… It really wounds me to know that I've hurt her - that I've upset her. How alone she must have felt when she thought I'd died. My dad…" He twisted his lips in a frown. "He only stayed for two weeks after my funeral, you know?" She did know that. In all the time that she had known Deku, she had only heard him mention his father twice and both had been offhand comments. Meeting him after his son's death had been uncomfortable. "He couldn't handle…" Deku shook his head. "She's always taken care of everything on her own, including herself."
"I should've been there for her more," Uraraka admitted, shame filling her heart. Of course, she had kept in close contact with Inko Midoriya. They had lunch often and Uraraka took her to the mall, among other things. All Might stayed close with her as well. Neither one of them had wanted her to be alone, but just as no one could truly fill the void that Deku had left behind in Uraraka's life, she had known that, at the end of the day, there was very little they could do to help her mourn the loss of her only child. "I should've…"
"No." Deku turned back around and grabbed her hand. "You did everything you could. It wasn't on you to shoulder everyone's pain, not when you were suffering as well."
This was perhaps the closest Deku had gotten to admitting that his death had changed everything. He'd glossed over it before, as if him seemingly coming back to life erased all the pain they'd gone through in the eleven months that he'd been gone, but now he was confronting it. Why? Had it been because of their argument? Had he finally come to realize that some things had been irrevocably changed?
She could love him all she wanted, but she also couldn't forget that sense of freedom she'd felt the night before he'd come back. The feeling that she could breathe and it was okay to take that next step forward in moving on with her life. She hadn't known what it might entail, but she had been ready to find out.
It was gone though, all dashed away, and just as she had been left to wonder for eleven months what might have happened if Deku hadn't died, she couldn't help but wonder what would've happened if he hadn't come back. It made her feel sick, guilty, angry, and confused and she didn't even know where to direct those emotions.
In a way, right now, it looked like Deku was thinking the same thing. What if he hadn't popped back in her life that morning? Where would she be now? Where would he be? Her stomach twisted. He would be in a far worse place than he was now if that was possible. She had to believe that him seeking her meant something good and not just a part of Kyōmu's mind games.
"What are we doing here, Deku?" Uraraka finally asked.
Deku's gaze swung from their position at the mouth of the alley and he pointed at the park to the left. "I used to go there all the time after school to play with Kacchan and the others - except, after their quirks manifested, it wasn't really playing." His voice was strange, sounding cut off from him. The only way she could explain it was that it sounded like he wasn't here or there. "I was stupid for a long time - I still thought we could be friends - but after a while, I knew the most I could hope for was for him to ignore me. Even though I loved the park, especially around this time, I started to avoid it, just so I could have a peaceful day, but it just got worse at school instead."
Uraraka tentatively put a hand on his arm. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell any of us?"
"I don't know," Deku admitted. "Maybe I thought it would make me look weak."
"The first time you two confronted each other, you gave it your all," Uraraka pointed out. "How could I have ever thought you weak?"
"I guess…" Deku's face was impossible to read. Was he sad? Angry? Disappointed? Accepting? His eyes stayed locked on the park. "I guess I thought it didn't matter. He was going to become a hero, no matter what, and so was I. What did it matter if he used to terrorize me and so many other kids just because he was strong and he could? That wasn't going to change anything. It didn't matter. I didn't matter. At the end of the day, hero society doesn't care if you're a terrible person deep down if you're strong. The end will always justify the means."
"You can't think that."
"I know that." Deku turned to look at her. "And I bet you know a little more of that now after what you heard during Todoroki's sessions with Kyōmu."
She winced and pulled her hand away. To be honest, she'd known some about it already. After Deku's death, she and Todoroki had spent a lot of time together slowly opening up about things. She'd once thought that he had it all, having been raised by the number two hero. That position had earned him a lot of money. However, when he'd haltingly talked about what his childhood had been like… She might not have been rich, but she'd had more than him as well in so many ways.
Deku leaned against the brick wall, just out of the reach of the streetlamp and keeping him in the shadows. With his face plastered all over the news, he couldn't stroll around as easily as he had before, especially not when he was in his villain costume. He was too recognizable and there were still a few people out and about despite it being close to night. If someone noticed him, a lot of trouble would come about. It felt like they were waiting for someone or something, but she didn't know who with his mom having been taken to a safe place.
It was getting close to that time where the park would be deserted. Besides a handful of kids and a few parents, it was beginning to empty out. It was getting close to when families would eat dinner and kids would go to bed. Once that happened, Deku could show his face. He'd been in public quite a few times after his death, but no one had paid attention to him then. He went back to being the average-looking boy everyone had remembered him by before he'd become a hero.
"Why did you bring me here?" Uraraka asked again.
Deku pointed to an area of the park at their two o'clock where a few benches sat next to the playground. Parents could sit down and watch their children play. There were no parents there now and there was only one child with a mother and father on the other side of the playground, but the benches weren't empty. A young dark-haired boy sat on one, anxiously looking around and then glancing down at his cell phone in his hands. Just as the area had, he looked familiar as well, but the distance made it difficult to tell who it was immediately.
When he looked around again, his head turning in their direction but not seeing them, Uraraka gasped and jerked around. "Deku, you can't!" He just looked at her, his eyes considering and dim. "You can't bring him into this. He's innocent. He's just a kid!"
Instead of arguing with her, Deku held his ups hands. "He contacted me, not the other way around."
Uraraka swallowed and looked back out to Kota. He was obviously waiting for someone - for Deku - and it made her stomach lurch. Why? Why did you come here?
That was a dumb question though, wasn't it? She knew why. It was because this was Deku, the new Symbol of Peace and Kota's personal hero. Deku had meant more to him than any other fan could say. He was the first person that Deku had saved on his own as nothing more than a first year U.A. student. Deku had shattered his arms to save him from Muscular, going further than any of them could've imagined. Uraraka could still remember how utterly destroyed he had looked in the forest, but that hadn't stopped him in the slightest until the very end when his body simply gave out.
Deku had become a hero that day, not when he'd received his license.
Kota's life had not only been saved but irrevocably changed. Gone was his loathing of heroes and rejection of quirks. He would still mourn the death of his parents, dead at the hands of the villain who had nearly claimed his own life, but he understood them better. He'd received closure that he had never expected nor wanted. The moment Deku had saved him, his whole world had turned on its end and he was able to step through a door that he'd locked.
A person's quirk could become weak without use and it was likely, if he had lived somehow but Deku had sacrificed so much to save him, Kota's quirk would have eventually rotted away. Instead, he had begun to use it again, bringing it back to life, and she knew, from Deku talking about him a year ago, that it had come back full force, renewed with the potential to be stronger than his parents' water quirks.
And now, here he was, sitting on a bench alone in a park as the sun set, waiting for his hero to return. Except that hero was gone, replaced by someone who hunted in the shadows that she knew would only horrify him.
She couldn't handle the idea of his world crumbling around him. He'd built so much around Deku and with his help. They'd stayed in close contact and Kota had even stayed in the city a few times with him, like a little brother or nephew. He shouldn't be here. He shouldn't have to see Deku like this. It had been excruciating for her, devastating for All Might, terrible for Bakugou, painful for Todoroki, and tragic and so many other things for everyone else. She didn't want to think about how much this would break Kota. Even though he was only a few years younger than when they'd gone to U.A., he was still just a boy.
"Let me send him back to U.A.," Uraraka pleaded. "I don't know what your plan is, but please, let him go."
Deku eyed Uraraka sideways. "I'm not planning on kidnapping him, if that's what you're worried about, or hurting him to get back at Kacchan or the others." He frowned. "Do you think I'd kill a child so thoughtlessly?"
Uraraka's mouth was dry, so she didn't say anything. To be honest, she didn't know what he was capable of at this point and she was afraid to find out. He was still upset over the newscast and Bakugou's announcement. Getting Kota involved somehow would be an excellent dig at them, a hit right under their noses. Kota glanced at his cell again, tapped perhaps a message on it, hesitated, and then set his phone down. Yes, he was definitely waiting on them. Were they running late? Was Deku waiting on purpose to see if Kota had someone waiting to attack should they show their faces?
"He reached out to me and I answered," Deku said, watching who could've been considered his number one fan. "I told him that I would always do so when he called. I'd never let him down, at least in that regard. I couldn't always be the perfect hero, but I'd do whatever I could to help him." He tilted his head in thought. "How could I say no? What kind of person would that make me? He was so frantic and upset. I couldn't say no."
"What are you going to do then?" Uraraka questioned.
"I don't know," Deku replied and he sounded completely honest. "Talk, I suppose. He deserves the truth."
Almost subconsciously, he kept clenching and unclenching his right first. It was his right arm that he'd broken so severely while protecting Kota that not even Recovery Girl could heal the vicious scar left behind. It didn't hurt him anymore, but every now and then, she thought there might be some phantom pains. He hadn't talked about it much before, not wanting to dwell on the damage that he'd done to his body in order to learn control over his quirk. It had pushed him to his very limits, nearly killing him so many times.
"If I can help him understand, if only a little, then maybe I won't have failed him entirely." Deku hung his head. Was it shame? Guilt? There was still so much resting on his shoulders. Everyone put so much on him, thinking he could handle it. How long had it been since he could just breathe? Had he ever been like that or had he always been pushing himself since deciding he wanted to become a hero like All Might? "Kids are so impressionable, you know? We all have our heroes and sometimes… Well, sometimes they're not quite who we thought they were and it hurts."
His words struck a chord in Uraraka's chest, making her realize that he wasn't just talking about himself. "If you're referring to All Might, he-"
"I don't care about him," Deku interrupted coldly.
Uraraka pressed on anyway. "He's extremely worried for you. Seeing you like this is killing him."
Deku folded his arms across his chest and mumbled, "I wish it would kill him a little faster."
An arrow of pain struck Uraraka directly in the chest, sucking the air right out of her lungs. "You can't mean that. He was… All Might was everything to you. He's the reason you wanted to become a hero - the reason you were able to become one."
"By that definition, then he's the reason I became a villain too," Deku put in, holding up a lofty hand. "And worried about me? Of course he's worried. I've got his precious One for All. That's all that he's ever worried about. If he was capable of more than a half-hearted punch, he'd try to take that away. He'd probably be forced to kill me." When he laughed, there was no humor in it, nothing but coldness, and it made her cringe. He looked at his hand. "In the end, I'm nothing but a vessel to him. I'm nothing."
"How can you say that?" Uraraka demanded, utterly stricken. "You mean the world to him! I saw him the night you first attacked Bakugou and then Todoroki. This is breaking him to pieces."
"I broke myself to pieces!" Deku snapped, turning on her so quickly that she reared back. There was a vicious look on his face, but anguish in his eyes. "Over and over and over again! It was all I could do to appease him. Even then, I was never quite good enough. I felt like I was crawling just to do something right. I could breathe under the weight of that pressure. And the lies… All the lies…"
Uraraka stared at him. This must have been the work of Kyōmu again, twisting things here and there in Deku's memory, tainting his view of the hero who had shaped his whole world. It was a devastating but effective blow. All Might was such a massive part of Deku's life, even more so than her. A few tweaks of his memories of All Might - be it by erasing certain memories, altering them, or maybe adding a few fake ones - Deku's entire worldview could be changed. He could be made into a different person.
"I'm not going to lie to Kota," Deku finished. "He's strong though If he can move past it…"
"He won't," Uraraka told him. "You were- You are a hero to him."
"I hate to disappoint you both, Ochako, but that isn't me anymore." Deku shook his head. That boy had to be in there somewhere. He had to be locked away, just waiting to be brought back to the light. He couldn't be gone. He couldn't. Kota had to have seen the footage that had been leaked to the news, but he'd still believed that Deku was good. He still trusted Deku. It was a child's blind trust, of course, but then what did that make hers?
Feeling tired but not ready to give up, Uraraka dropped her hands to her side. "Is that why you brought me here? So I could see my last bit of hope taken away?"
"You needed some fresh air, didn't you?" Deku responded, but she knew that wasn't the truth. He glanced at her, seeing the disbelieving look on her face, and moved his gaze back to the park. "I bought you here for him. He asked for you. He's a clever kid. Besides, there might not be many people out here right now, but you can blend in better than I can these days."
"No, I'm not helping you," Uraraka said firmly.
"Then don't think of it that way," Deku replied, sounding as if he couldn't care less what she decided to do. "Think of it as helping Kota. Because without you here, it's just him and at least three villains."
A sense of dread settled in the pit of her stomach and she stepped away from him. That was all he'd needed to say to convince her. She couldn't leave Kota out on her own. After putting it that way, Uraraka felt almost grateful that Deku had brought her. Even without access to her quirk, she would protect Kota. It would've made more sense for him to leave her behind if he really wanted to sway Kota. He had to know that she would keep him away. Then again, she had thought that being with Deku might help break him away from the villains, but it felt as if she had only pushed him deeper into the illusion.
"Go on then," Deku said, inclining his head forward. "Go to him. I know you're itching to tell him how much I've changed."
It cut Uraraka to the quick. "Deku, that's not-"
But Deku turned away from her. "I wouldn't try to alert anyone to call the police if I were you. Dabi's on standby and he'd love an excuse to cause a scene."
As much as she wanted Deku to look at her again, Uraraka knew that he wouldn't. Instead of letting her heart sink, she pressed on, stepping out of the dark alley and into the dim light of dusk. Kota didn't notice her walking up to him, his feet bouncing on the ground as he gazed down at his phone again. She opened her mouth to call out to him, but then bit her lip, her mind going back to what Deku had said to her last. Taking a deep breath, she kept on walking until she was only a few meters from the bench.
Before Uraraka could say anything to announce her presence, Kota looked up right at her, as if sensing she was there, and he jumped to his feet as if the bench had shocked him. "Uraraka!" He gave her no time to react, bolting towards her and wrapping his arms around her. She clung to him tightly as he pressed his face into his shoulder. He'd grown so much since she had first seen him at the UA Training Camp. Gods, he was getting so tall. "You're here. You came."
I didn't have much of a choice, she thought.
She couldn't say that to him though. If given the choice, she would still be here. There was no way she was going to leave him alone with Deku, especially not when she couldn't figure out his current mental state. "Kota." She kept her voice no louder than a whisper, despite the fact that there was no way that Deku, Dabi, or anyone else but him could hear her. "You shouldn't have come him. You shouldn't have contacted him."
"I don't understand." Kota began to pull away, but she held onto him tighter and kept him in place.
"Please." Uraraka closed her eyes. "I don't know if it'll do any good, but run away. Run as fast as you can. You need to get out of here. I can't protect you. My quirk - they've done something to me so I can't use it."
Kota went still in her arms. He'd lifted his head enough that he could look over her shoulders, the alley directly in his line of sight. "He's really gone, isn't he?" She slowly opened her eyes. His voice was low and she could tell that he was shoving away as much emotion as he could. "The news and everyone said he was a villain now, but I didn't believe it. He couldn't be one. He couldn't be…"
"It's not him," Uraraka promised. "It's not him."
She could hear Kyōmu's words ricocheting in her mind: "It's still him in there, the boy you loved." Did it make things worse if he wasn't there or if it was him? She didn't know anymore.
"I had to do something," Kota insisted, his voice cracking like any preteen's would. She knew it was for a different reason though. "I watched the video repeatedly and all I could think about how alone he was - how he fought all by himself. I kept thinking-" He clutched her shirt. "He wouldn't give up. He'd jump in to save the day. Everyone was only talking about how they could defeat him, not save him and I couldn't let it go."
Uraraka could understand that. She felt it - that inability to let him go, to stop fighting for him, to give in to this reality. Every second with the villains had clawed away at that determination to the point where she now felt like she was faltering, especially with Kota having been pulled in the crosshairs. If she believed that Deku wasn't capable of hurting Kota, then why was she so afraid for him? It wasn't her fault. The last few days had dragged her to a level she hadn't thought existed.
Pulling away from him, Uraraka put her hands on his shoulders and fixed him with a firm look. "Go - now - as fast as you can."
He didn't run though and shook his head. It was only then that she noticed his body trembling underneath her palms. He was afraid. "I can't."
She furrowed her brow. "Why not?"
"Because I'm here."
Uraraka ripped her hands from Kota's shoulders and spun around. Night had almost completely overtaken them and, in this spot under the trees, the streetlights that dotted the park didn't reach them well. With his dark villain costume, Deku blended in well in the dark, except for his red gloves. She stood her ground in front of Kota, splaying her arms out, as if she could do anything to shield him from his idol. With the shadows over his face, it was hard to read Deku's expression, except for maybe disappointment.
"Stay back," Uraraka told him, not bothering to be gentle anymore. It was different with a child around. She would not bend to him.
Deku only held up his hands. "Relax, I'm not going to do anything." He leaned to the side, peering around Uraraka and Kota shuffled further behind her as if he could hide. "You contacted me, didn't you? If you ever needed me, I told you to call and I would come as soon as possible. And I did." He held out his hand and tapped his foot. "First things first: you know the rule."
Even though she could sense his fear and feel his hesitancy, Kota stepped to the side into view. Bending down, he set his phone on the ground and slid it over to Deku, who picked it up and pocketed it. That way Kota couldn't alert anyone either. "It's true then?" he asked. "You're a villain?"
"That depends on your definition of a villain," Deku prompted.
A fire sparked in Kota and he took a step forward. Only Uraraka putting her am against him held him back. "Aizawa said in the interview that you killed people."
"They were villains and causing a lot of problems for Uravity and the agency she works at," Deku pointed out, his voice mild, like a teacher's.
"You helped kidnap Uraraka and Shouto!" Kota exclaimed heatedly.
Deku didn't even blink. "She asked me to take her with me. Besides, does she look kidnapped to you now?"
At this, Kota hesitated and Uraraka flinched. She had asked him to do that. Plus, in her current outfit, she could honestly say that no, she didn't look as if she'd been kidnapped. She looked like she'd come here for a nighttime stroll in the park. When she had walked towards Kota, the few people left had paid her no mind. She didn't look like missing in action pro hero Uravity.
Instead of backing down though, Kota clenched his hands into fists. "You were fighting your best friends. You tried to kill them."
"There would've been no trying if that was the case," Deku said. "If I wanted them dead, they would be. I have the power for that."
Kota's face paled, but Uraraka knew that Deku was only being honest. He hadn't wanted to kill Todoroki - he'd even admitted as such multiple times - and so when given the choice he had opted to spare him. He could've killed Bakugou right away, but he'd chosen a method that, while terribly cruel, would let him live. Even Kaminari, who Deku had finally told her was alive, hadn't been hurt directly by him. Deku could've easily killed him right after ending the video chat and they would've been none the wiser.
Had he...deliberately spared their lives? Even Bakugou's?
"You-you broke those other villains out of prison," Kota finished, this time in a much quieter and hurt tone.
This time, Deku sighed and nodded his head. "I did do that, didn't I? Well, there really isn't a good answer for that one. We needed more manpower and to shake things up. That was the best way to do it."
"You mean the villains?"
"Yes," Deku said flatly, "I mean the villains. I mean us."
Kota burst like a dam, tears filling up his eyes. "You can't be one though. You're a hero! You're Deku!"
"I'm not that person anymore, Kota," Deku told him. "I'm sorry."
"You saved my life," Kota proclaimed. Any other person would've taken a step back, but he stayed rooted in his spot. It was an admirable if not terrifying trait at the moment. "I would've died. You...you sacrificed so much to save me. You changed everything."
When Deku stepped forward, Uraraka moved to get in his way, but Kota put a hand on her arm and she stopped. She couldn't have said why she did. No, she wasn't a match for Deku, not even in the slightest right now, but she refused to let him get close enough to touch Kota. Still, the second she felt his hand on her arm, she hesitated and so did Deku, keeping himself at an arm's length.
"And I would do it again," Deku insisted. "I'd save you again - right here, right now."
"You said it yourself though," Kota replied. "You're not that person. You're a villain."
"That doesn't mean I can't do heroic things," Deku said. His words only made Kota's frown deepen. "The world isn't black and white like so many heroes make it out to be. Good and evil - they're two made up words. No one is wholly good or evil. We're a mixture of both and so much more." He scoffed. "Heroes are quick to label all villains as evil, but I've witnessed behavior from heroes that could be labeled even more villainous. Who are they to decide what is right and wrong?"
"Who are you?" Kota countered. Uraraka felt a burst of pride towards him. Any other civilian would have been shaking under the weight of Deku's gaze. It was heavy, no light in his eyes, and considering in a way that made her skin crawl. For however afraid he was, Kota didn't look away.
"You know, if I'd followed the rules that night during the camping trip," Deku drawled, "if I'd done as I was told by the pro heroes in charge, you'd be dead." Kota didn't flinch, but she could tell that he was stung by Deku's words. Even worse, Uraraka knew that he was telling the truth. They'd been given strict orders not to fight the villains or suffer possible expulsion and Deku had done it anyways. "If I'd listened, I would have stood by and watched as Muscular tore you apart. I wouldn't have intervened. I wouldn't have saved you. And I would've been considered a good and obedient student. I wouldn't have gotten in trouble for protecting you."
Kota struggled, shuffling on his feet again. "That's not…"
"Now tell me: what kind of hero just lets a child die?" Deku asked. "Where's the good in that?" Kota didn't have an answer and the truth was that Uraraka didn't either. The only reason they'd been able to fight to attempt to save Bakugou and Tokoyami from getting kidnapped was because Aizawa had given them permission and even he had been scolded for it by the press and his superiors. "There isn't and I'll tell you why. Because the people that hold all the power, the ones in control, they don't want heroes. They want obedient dogs that will bark when told to speak, heel on command, and bite when ordered. That's not good. That's not heroic."
When Kota went silent and stared hard at the ground, Uraraka could sense the shift in the air. Deku stood up straight, a faint look of accomplishment on his face. The fact that she wasn't denying it meant that it was true. By all accounts, Kota should be dead right now. Deku never should've gone to look for him and he definitely shouldn't have stepped in to fight a villain to save him. He shouldn't have been a hero when he was only a student.
It was one of the most defining moments of Deku's life, one of his biggest motivators to become the number one hero, and he'd been scolded for it. He'd shattered his body to save a child and had been forced to worry about getting expelled from school. She thought it was partly why he had been so quick to save Bakugou from the League. The chance of him losing his dream had already been hanging over his head. Even more shaming to UA, he didn't regret it. He would've done it again if it meant Kota would be alive. What was more important? The life of an innocent or becoming a hero?
The fact that he had been placed in the position to make that call spoke a lot about what it meant to be a hero. Not even Uraraka could deny that.
"Maybe you're right," Kota finally said, still looking at the ground. Uraraka's heart skipped a beat. "But it doesn't matter. The Deku I knew didn't care about things like that. The only thing he wanted to do you - the only thing you wanted to do was save people." He wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand and lifted his head so that he could glare at Deku. "Even if sometimes that just meant talking to a kid who was learning to accept his quirk again. If you don't believe that being a hero means saving people and none of that other bullshit, then Deku really did die."
"And a heroic death it was too!" Deku shot back. "How much praise did they smother on me for my sacrifice? How much did the media hound Ochako for her reactions?" She turned her head away slightly. They had come after her a lot in that first month, especially when she'd gone back to work. Some had accused her of being heartless since she'd gone back after only two weeks, others brave and inspirational. Bakugou had scared off a lot of paparazzi looking for that perfect sound bite or picture of her in mourning. "Remind you of anything? That's all heroes are, Kota. Nothing but cardboard cutouts for the public. How long before I was erased in the ranks like I wasn't even there? Such a heroic death, one to be proud of and admire, and it meant nothing."
"That's not true," Uraraka cut in. "You saved so many lives that day."
"I wonder how many of those people are now convinced I wasn't truly a hero," Deku said. "You're only a hero until someone decides you aren't. It doesn't matter who or how many people you save. I could've easily been stopped after I saved Kota - or even after I saved you in the entrance exams."
Uraraka shook her head. "But you weren't. That was the reason why they accepted you: because you chose to save someone instead of helping yourself."
"Yet the moment when I was put in that position in the real world, it was the wrong one," Deku countered hotly. It wasn't just saving Kota either. There was also the Hero Killer Incident where he and Todoroki had run off to save Iida. And then when he had chosen to save Bakugou, putting his entire future on the line, it had happened again. Scolded for trying to save another. It was all such a mess. Kyōmu had used so many important moments in Deku's life that molded him into a hero to turn him into a villain. It was hard to understand. "The whole thing is messed up and corrupt! It can't be good. It can't!"
"But you can be and that's what being a hero really is," Kota said.
"You're only a hero if you conform to the system," Deku declared emphatically. "That's why it has to be destroyed."
"I don't believe it," Kota replied. "I don't believe you."
Deku reared back slightly, but he didn't look angry, only disappointed. "You're young. It's easy to be idealistic now. I didn't help that. One day though, you'll understand that I'm right." He held out a hand and turned on his heels in the direction of the alley. "C'mon, Ochako, we're leaving. I told you that I wouldn't do anything to harm him. It's time he went home."
Before Uraraka could even think whether to listen to him or not, Kota moved so that he was standing in front of her and Uraraka realized with a shock that he was meaning to protect her. She'd told him that she couldn't use her quirk, but he could use his. He was putting her life above his safety.
Putting a hand on Kota's shoulder, she quietly said, "We can't win right now, but I'll be okay."
"No." Kota flexed his fingers at his sides, but she could see them shaking again. "I won't let you take her."
Deku paused to look back at him. "I wasn't asking." His eyes flickered to hers. "You remember what I said?"
Biting her lip, Uraraka nodded and squeezed Kota's shoulder. "This isn't your battle."
Kota stared up at her in the eyes and she could tell exactly what he was thinking through that angry and crestfallen gaze. If it had to do with Deku, then of course it was his battle. She'd been afraid of that. She worried that he might do something rash, like she had done to save Bakugou, but then a familiar sound echoed in the air.
All three of them jerked in the direction of the sound, Deku tensing in preparation and Uraraka's heart soaring with hope. She knew that sound. It was similar to a noise that she heard on a daily basis, but not quite the same. It was personal and reminded her of so many good things in her life. It could've been anything else, but she knew that sound instinctively. Not an explosion, but the comforting sound of an engine.
Deku activated his quirk at the last second and leaped out of the way before Iida slid into their line of sight, an engine-powered kick just barely missing Deku by an inch. Uraraka's hair whipped in the wind caused by Iida's speed, but despite being overwhelmed with emotion over seeing a close friend, she grabbed Kota and pulled him out of the way.
"Uraraka!" Iida turned to look at her, his eyes wide with shock behind his glasses.
"There's no time to explain!" Uraraka shouted. "He's not alone!"
As if on cue, blue flames exploded towards Iida, who was fortunately quick enough to dodge them. Uraraka bent over Kota, protecting him as much as she could. As close as they had been, the flames didn't touch her, but the intense heat from them licked at her back and made her sweat.
"We're not alone either," Iida prepared, turning his gaze to Deku, who was standing on top of a slide and glaring down at them. Upon hearing the sound of vehicles and the telltale sound of an explosion, Uraraka almost collapsed with relief. Back-up had arrived and the real battle was about to begin.