Disclaimer: Neither Avatar: the Last Airbender nor its characters belong to me, nor will they ever

I know, I'm the worst, I never update, I'm sorry!

Katara awoke to an awful pounding in her head. The sunlight burned and caused her eyes to water when she opened them, and she pulled the covers over her head to block it out.

"Ah, you are awake! Good morning, Lady Katara!"

Jien's voice echoed in her skull, and she pressed her thumb and forefinger to her eyes. "What?"

"Here, drink these. They will help."

Katara pushed back the covers and managed to sit up, trying not to resent Jien's bright smile and sunny disposition. She took the proffered teacup, managing to down the acrid, foul-smelling tea, followed by nearly half a pitcher of water. Though the pounding in her head was still present, she was now awake, and she looked around her room. How did she get here? Last she remembered was…dinner. That awful dinner. And then drinking with Reike and his sister.

"Ugh, I am never drinking again," she groaned.

"We have all been there, Lady Katara."

She looked down. "Why am I still in last night's dress?" She looked up. "How did I get to my room last night."

"I believe you had a little too much to drink, so the Fire Lord carried you in. I told him I would help you dress for bed, but he wanted to let you sleep."

Katara could feel her face start to burn. She could not remember what happened after dinner, but if her head hurt this badly and Zuko had to carry her to bed, it could not have been pretty. "And where is the Fire Lord now?"

"He went into the city to see off the last of the Earth Kingdom envoy. I do not believe he has returned yet."

Wanting to feel like a person again, Katara let Jien draw her a bath, which she sat in until the water was lukewarm. When she emerged, she felt much better, though her head still throbbed slowly.

"Lord and Lady Zhee have invited you to afternoon tea, if you are feeling up to it."

"Who?"

Jien bit her lip and began rummaging through her wardrobe. "Lord Reike and his sister."

"Oh," she said, realizing she hadn't known Reike's surname.

When she did not answer, Jien asked quietly, "Should I have an escort readied?"

"Why?"

"Tea's at their family estate, outside the city."

Katara gasped. "I get to leave the palace?"

Jien smiled brightly. "Yes."

The Fire Lady dressed and was waiting at the palace entrance in the blink of an eye. Jien introduced her to the Captain of the Palace Guard whom she realized she hadn't met formally before, only to ascertain Zuko's whereabouts. He was a young man, maybe only a few years older than Zuko, tall, with a fierce furrow to his brow and dark eyes narrowed vigilantly. He bowed reverently to her. "Fire Lady Katara, I am Captain Thal. Allow me to introduce you to your retinue." He proceeded to introduce her to four Firebending Palace Guards who would serve as her protectors when she needed to leave the palace. They were all very serious looking, of various sizes: big and burly and lean and lithe. Each had a weapon at his hip, except one who had dual hook swords at his back. They bowed almost in unison, and surrounded her and Jien as they escorted them through the palace gates, Captain Thal leading the way.

It was a short walk to the Zhee Estate, which was directly south of the palace's main gate. No one in their small party spoke, and Katara clasped her hands in front of her nervously. When they reached the Zhee's gate, Thal turned to her. "My lady, we will patrol the ground until you are ready to leave. Please let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you, Captain, I will."

Reike met her at the front door and Jien excuse herself, telling Katara she would be in the servant's quarters. The "estate" was more modest than she had been expecting, just a simple house typical of the Fire Nation capital. She mentioned this to him and he laughed. "Don't let my mother hear you say that. She hates this house. Too small for her, too."

"I never said it was too small for me. I just meant it is small for a noble family."

"And how would you know? How many noble family homes have you visited?"

"Oh, leave her be," Leike commanded from her place in the common room, a tea set on the table in front of her. Katara sat on the cushion next to her, and Reike poured them all tea.

"I hate to admit it, but he's not wrong. This is the first nobles' house I've visited."

"I bet it is the first time you havve been outside the palace in six months."

With a start, Katara realized that it had been six months since she moved into the palace, and weeks since she and Zuko had sneaked to the market.

"It is one of the reasons we like this house: because our parents do not," Leike said with a smile.

Katara asked Leike about her Earth Kingdom travels, to change the subject. Leike regaled them with tales of both leisure and adventures, from visiting luxurious spas built around natural hot spring in the north and meeting a group of sell-swords and traveling through the mountains with them.

"Really, sister? Sell-swords?"

"Well, if I had not been caged like a canary my whole life, maybe I would be a bit more cautious."

"And a better storyteller," Reike mumbled.

"What do you mean caged?" Katara asked.

"While my brother traveled with my father to the capital and spent time at court and with the army, I was forced to stay at home, at our country estate, so my mother could groom me into the perfect little wife for someone who would elevate her status. I was never allowed to leave the country house, especially after Reike broke Azula's heart and wrecked his chances with her."

Katara choked on her tea. "I'm sorry, what?"

Reike scowled at his sister but explained. "I did not break her heart. When Zuko and I were eight, I made the mistake of saying Azula wasn't that good of a Firebender. She nearly killed me with a fireball and after that I just ignored her existence completely. I don't know what bothered her more, come to think of it. But yes, our mother initially had her sights set on me marrying the princess, but, well, you see how well that turned out."

"I'm guessing you were to marry Zuko?" Katara asked, her tone even.

"Perhaps. But when Azula nearly killed Reike, she adjusted her sights to other well-to-do families. But then both my father and Reike were away with the army, and suddenly the war was over and things began to…change." She shrugged. "I think she was tired of fighting us about it."

"What are your plans now? Are you going to stay in the capital long?"

"I need to visit my parents. I'll leave the day after tomorrow and return next month, but after that, I am not sure." Leike asked her brother how he was occupying his time these days, and he proceeded to bore them all with summaries of his political occupations. "You are not dating anyone?" His sister asked, licking the residue of a sticky bun off her fingertips.

"Any one?" He laughed. "No. No, I am dating many."

Leike threw a pillow across the room at him. "Cad. You are going to find yourself in trouble one of these days."

Reike's smile faded but he offered no retort.

"You tell me, Katara. You have traveled the world. Where should I venture next?"

The twins listened intently as she gave an abridged version of her travels with the Avatar, skimming over the commonly known parts and going into greater detail about Zuko's involvement.

"Wow, I did not realize he had been such a…"

"Cad?" Katara offered, stealing Leike's word. "The first year was the worst, before he…changed sides," she stated, not quite sure how to describe Zuko's change of heart. "He became a different person, really."

"I think it was more that he realized his honor was more important than his father's approval."

Katara looked at Reike. She was in agreement, but she hadn't thought of it that way before. "Anyway, you should definitely visit Kyoshi when you have the change. An island of strong, independent women? I think you would fit in quite well."

Reike smiled at his sister. "Perhaps I should accompany you. You know, for propriety's sake."

Leike laughed. "Right, that would be the reason."

It was dark before she met Jien in the foyer and they began their journey back to the palace. She had really enjoyed spending time with the brother-sister duo, but as the afternoon wore on, she found herself missing her own brother. In Sokka's last letter, he had told her all about their preparations for the arrival of the baby. It was due any day now, she realize with a start. It would also be years before she got to see her niece or nephew, unless they traveled to the Fire Nation to visit her, which she couldn't imagine them doing. Not right away, at least.

Katara had cleaned and dressed just in time to meet Iroh and Zuko for dinner. Being away from the palace had helped her clear her head, as well as suppress the memory of last night. But she still struggled to meet Zuko's eye.

"Did you enjoy yourself at the Zhee's, Katara?"

"I did. We had a nice afternoon, and it was nice to get out of the palace."

"Oh, I bet. I'm sure you two will be glad to have the place to yourselves again."

She looked across the table. "Are…are you going somewhere?"

"Just for a few weeks, to visit some old friends in Ba Sing Se. You'll hardly notice my absence."

Katara nodded, but couldn't help the anxiety building in her stomach. For so long, Iroh had felt like the glue that kept her and Zuko together, the only other family she had. What would she do without him for so long?

As they walked to their room after dinner, Zuko cleared his throat. "Tano asked me to give you this," he said, holding out a scroll wrapped in green ribbon.

"Tano?"

"The general's son. From last night."

"Oh." Her cheeks flamed thinking about last night. What she could remember, anyway. She unfurled the scroll a bit. "'Earth Kingdom Folklore,'" she read. "That was…kind of him."

Zuko snorted but didn't say anything.

Katara place the scroll on her bedside table so she would remember to store it in her office in the morning. "How was your day?" she asked.

"Fine. Glad to be rid of them."

She smiled. She was, too. Then she said, "Zuko, about last night…I'm sorry."

He stepped out from behind his dressing screen in just his sleeping pants. "For what?"

"For last night."

"Yes, but what specifically?"

He was staring at her as she crawled into bed. "Well, for the scene at dinner—"

"That was not your fault—"

"And after. For drinking too much. For needing you to carry me to bed." She sat up and looked at him. "Why, did I do something else?"

"No. And you do not need to apologize. For any of it."

"You…you are lying to me. Why? What did I do?"

"Nothing, Katara. Just…go to sleep."

She stood, relighting the candle on her bedside table.

"Katara—"

"I am not tired. You sleep." She grabbed the scroll and opened it. The first story printed was the one of Oma and Shu. She knew that one already.

"You were drunk," he said finally, coming to stand beside her.

"I know that. I want to know what I did."

"You did not do anything. You were…upset."

"Well, of course I was upset. He said those…horrible things, in front of everyone. But what did I say…or do?"

"You made me promise you something."

Her heart began to pound. He would not look at her. Oh, spirits. "What?" she whispered.

"That I would kiss you."

Her breath caught in her throat.

"Today."

She turned to look at him, only to find his face a hairsbreadth from hers. He reached to stroke her jaw, her cheek.

"Don't," she pleaded.

He leaned back slightly to look her in the eye. "What?"

"Don't run away this time."

The barest of a smile grazed his lips before he pressed them to hers. She reached for him, placing her hand on the warm column of his neck. He kissed her gently, sweetly, and when he pulled away, she was disappointed.

He swallowed and took a steadying breath. "There. I've kept my promise."

A stinging sensation sprang to her eyes immediately, and she shook her head and kissed him, forcefully this time. He angled his body towards hers and pulled her closer to him, running his hands from her waist to her back to her hair.

Everything happened so fast. Katara's head was flooded with emotions; some frightened her, some she couldn't even identify. But she did know that this—kissing Zuko, his hands on her body—did feel good. It almost felt…right. It felt oddly natural for her to thread her fingers through his hair, for her to allow his tongue entrance to her mouth.

She was engulfed in this incredible heat, but she had no desire for reprieve.

This was right, right? He was her husband, after all.

She found herself pressed against the wall, with Zuko's hands on her lower back pulling her against him, as if they weren't close enough. His lips were traveling down her neck, gently kissing and sucking. She shuddered involuntarily, and she could feel Zuko smile against her skin.

Spirits, she was so hot, and briefly she wondered if it was because she was with a Firebender, or because of what she was doing with one.

Suddenly, he was fumbling with the opening of her robe, and before she had time to register what he was doing, his hot hand touched her abdomen, practically burning through the silk of her nightdress to her skin. She froze, but didn't push him away. He seemed to be proceeding cautiously, because his hand just rested on her stomach for a moment. She decided to push her sudden anxiety aside and return her focus to kissing him.

Until his hand rose to gently cup her covered breast.

She panicked.

"Zuko," she said, putting a hand on his chest and pushing slightly. "Zuko, stop."

He lifted his head and looked down at her. As if woken from a trance, he asked, "What?"

She pushed a little harder. "Zuko, please…stop."

Realization dawned. His eyes widened and he dropped his hands swiftly, stepping away from her.

She leaned against the wall and held her robe closed. Breathing became easier, but she couldn't help but feel she'd just suffered a great loss, and, ashamed, she couldn't lift her eyes to meet his.

"Katara, I'm sorry. I didn't mean—I just—"

Her head snapped up and she looked at his alarmed expression. "Don't apologize, Zuko. You didn't…you didn't do anything. I just…I'm not ready."

His eyes searched her face, and when he didn't move or say anything, she stepped towards him and leaned into his chest. His arms came around her immediately.

"I'm sorry, Katara," he murmured into her hair.

"Please don't apologize. You didn't do anything I didn't want you to do. Maybe," she started to say, but paused to bite her lower lip. "Maybe we can try again, but…go a bit slower. I—I do enjoy…kissing you," she admitted quietly, feeling her face grow hot with embarrassment.

Zuko kissed the top of her head. "I enjoy you kissing me, too," he said, and laughed when she smacked him in the ribs.

He reached to hold her at arms length and stared down at her for a minute before he took her by the hand and led her to their bed. When he sat on the edge, they were at eye-level with each other.

Katara's heart was beating wildly in her chest as he began rubbing his hands up and down her arms slowly. And his eyes—he was looking at her, but it was as if he was looking at her for the first time. He was alert, and his eyes were focused as they roamed over every inch of her. His hands stopped at the collar of her robe.

"May I?" he asked quietly. "I just…want to look at you. And you can tell me no."

She bit her lip, then whispered, "Yes."

Because she had not retied the belt after Zuko had untied it just moments ago, the robe slipped off her shoulders easily. Somehow she managed to hold his gaze as she stood before him in just her nightdress, even though she knew her face was bright red.

He reached out for her again, but this time his hands just rested on her shoulders, massaging small circles with his thumbs.

"What are you thinking?" she asked suddenly.

"I'm thinking you look scared to death right now."

"I'm not," she declared, indignant, but her voice was strained. She swallowed and took a deep breath. "I'm not…scared, just…."

"I know." His hands slid down her bare arms, rested on her hips, and he pulled her closer to him, so that she was standing between his knees. "Is this still slow enough?"

They were standing so close that she could feel his breath on her cheeks and lips. She nodded. "Well, maybe we could go a little faster." Slowly, she pressed her lips to his. When she deepened the kiss, he mirrored her movements, being careful not to push her. Until she bit his lower lip.

He groaned and pulled back. "Katara, we shouldn't…we should stop."

She frowned. "Why? We…we are married."

Immediately, he withdrew. The change in him was like blowing out a candle: he was suddenly so cold and dark.

She reached out for him. "What? What did I say?"

He wouldn't look at her, but his brow was furrowed intensely. "The thought of you doing this, being with me, out of obligation…it makes me sick."

He went to stand but she put her hands on his shoulders, rooting him in place.

"That—that is not what I meant at all! You should know by now that no one makes me do anything I don't want to do." She placed her fingers over his lips. "And please do not bring up the fact that we had an arranged marriage. I wouldn't do something like this unless it's what I wanted. What I meant was: we are married. It's not like we are doing anything…improper."

The ghost of a smirk grazed his mouth, but he pulled it back.

Her eyes searched his face. His muscles were tense beneath her hands. Her fingers traced his collarbones, the tendons in his neck, the stubble on his jaw. When her fingertips grazed the edge of his scar he began to turn away.

"Don't," she whispered.

He looked up at her, studying her face. Searching for disgust or something else he would not find. Then he turned into her hand, kissing her palm.

His hands moved from her waist up her back, pulling her deeper into his embrace. When she buried her face in his neck, he whispered, "Slow enough?"

She nodded.

"Come here," he said, grabbing her by the hands and pulling her into his arms so that she was lying on top of him.

She tried to push away. "I'll crush you."

He snorted. "Please."

She looked up at him, her hands folded beneath her chin. "Do you really expect us to sleep like this?"

His hands slipped from her shoulders and began massaging her lower back. "No."

She shifted, resting her head on his chest.

"Sleep, Katara."

She did.