Chapter 48 - Know It All

A/N: Just a reminder this chapter is in Hitomi's POV. I'm contemplating having a third one in her POV at some point, but I'm still throwing that idea around so it isn't set in stone. Anyway, enjoy!

. . .

I felt the shift, the change in the ether, the way the world tilted just a bit more. As if Atlas had shrugged his shoulders. I stopped in my tracks, physically stunned.

Kurama turned, eyeing me with curiosity. He was escorting me up the million stairs that led to Master Genkai's temple. But I wouldn't be able to take another step. Not for a few minutes at least. Not when a vision was about to hit me.

It felt like a blow to my gut and made my eyesight disappear. It made me sick. Every damn time it made me sick. I'd thought I was so important as a child, being able to see the future...now I knew better. I was nothing in the grand scheme of things. But that never stopped the violence behind my all seeing eye.

I knew when I fell to my knees but could do nothing to stop it.

Oh...oh...how it hurt. He'd done something life changing. Those were always the worst. Simple visions might not affect me so...but something on this grand a scale…

God damn you Jaganshi Hiei.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as the vision cleared and my cold shell cracked. I couldn't do this in front of him...please make it stop. Please. Please…

But the flood came and it was unrelenting. I'd just watched someone's birth, their life...their entire being. And then as if rewinding a tape it had all disappeared. Their soul went back to the heavens and there it would remain. No one would claim it. That poor lost soul…that beautiful little girl...

"Are you alright?"

Hands on my shoulders. Hands that were soft and tender and fake. I shoved away from him and stood. I wiped the tears from my cheeks even as more came to replace them. I couldn't stop crying. It hurt to see that. It crushed me to know she was gone.

I'd met her...in the future. I'd met her and I'd loved her.

My fault. This was all my fault.

"It's nothing…" I mumbled and then began the trek up the stairs once again.

"Was it about Hiei...or Yusuke?"

No worry for Kasumi. I smiled derisively at that. And just to spite him I ignored him. When he grabbed my arm to whirl me around I brought my energy up in a wild torrent of wind. He let go and took two steps down, away from me.

"Wind?" he asked.

"It seems Kasumi and I have an affinity for elements."

He held his hands out, as if to placate me, as if I didn't already know he could use his plants without his hands. "Please tell me what you saw."

"I can't," I said.

"Then can you at least tell me if they're alright?"

I nodded, "They're alive, if that's what you're asking."

A breath of relief from him and I left him behind in favor of climbing the stairs. I counted each one beneath my feet. I was somewhere in the hundreds by the time we reached the top. And I'd calmed down enough to stop the tears from flowing. These emotions were not real. None of this was real. But it felt like it was and I couldn't stop my body's natural response to pain.

Or at least that's what I told myself. No matter what, I knew that wasn't the whole truth. I really did care. I did. I had a heart that beat beneath my breast and it ruled me just the same as it didn't anyone else. Except…

Don't think about it. Worry about how you were going to fix Hiei's mistake. I didn't understand what he'd done. How could he erase an entire person's life so quickly? He hadn't known of their existence or even what came about to bring that existence into being...so how?

As I crossed the threshold of Genkai's temple grounds the answer struck me. The thread. He'd cut a piece. That was the only explanation.

I wished I could travel back to the future...back to that place...and ask him myself. Future Hiei...he would tell me. He would tell me every thought behind the actions he'd chosen. He was the reason I'd even bothered to return.

And I was sure if I did return there now he'd kill me. He'd kill me because of all the shit I'd messed up. No matter how hard I tried to fix things...to right the wrongs I'd made, to adjust the times I'd played with...I always made things worse.

I'd just wanted to save Kasumi. To at least give her a fighting chance in the coming days. However, my good intentions had not been well received.

I stalked through the front of Master Genkai's temple like I owned the place, stopping only to remove my shoes. I marched passed the living area where the women along with Kuwabara were gathered and straight towards a certain bedroom. It was the same one they'd placed Kasumi in during her short stay here. I heard someone call after me but I didn't listen. I barrelled into the room and fell face first into the bed.

The sheets were fresh and crisp - clean. No trace of Kasumi remained here. And that was a relief and a curse at the same time.

No one came to retrieve me. Not for a long time at any rate. The sun set and the moon rose and I wasted away in the bed. I should have just left. But earlier had been a blow and now I didn't know what I wanted to do anymore.

A soft knock on the door I hadn't bothered to close had me lifting up my head. My long hair brushed against my cheek as it fell over my shoulder. Standing in the doorway was Yukina.

"Hello Ice Maiden," I said.

Curious eyes, kind but not dull, looked me up and down. She held a tray with food and tea in her hands. I was sure it was for me, but I already planned to refuse it. I hadn't eaten much since I'd returned. I didn't have the stomach for it.

"Hello, Morimoto-san."

"You don't have to be so formal."

She nodded, entering the room and setting down the tray. I sat up, realizing she wanted something from me. That's right Yukina, show me that fire I knew rushed through your veins.

She lowered herself to the floor demurely, knees folded beneath her, hands in her lap. But her eyes, the same cherry red as Hiei's, were chips of ice. The sweet smile on her face hid so much behind it.

"I've been told that you have the ability to see the future," she said.

I nodded, eyeing the cup of tea that sat on the tray. I didn't feel like eating, but tea sounded nice. She noticed my interest and held out a hand, "Please, help yourself."

I did, holding the warmth in my palms as if I held something precious. I knew what was coming next. So there was no surprise at what Yukina said. "I need to know something about my brother."

"You're a determined one." I took a sip of the tea. Chamomile. Something to calm and soothe me. How funny. There was no soothing this wretched being. "But you already know who he is, don't you."

The smile on her lips fell just a bit. Something sparked in her eyes and she shifted, drawing herself in. She was nervous. Perhaps even ashamed. As she should be. They were both stubborn asses, the twins.

"I do not know what you mean. I've been searching for my twin brother for quite some time."

"You've found him. And you know it. There is no point lying to me. So ask the real question you came here for."

Yukina deflated, her eyes traveling to the floor. The distinct clink of tear gems rolling across the wood heralded tiny sobs. I sighed. I hadn't meant to make her cry.

But when her head shot back up to stare at me beseechingly there was anger in her eyes - anger and pain and outrage. She was not crying from sadness, at least not completely. She was crying for and because of him. "Does he ever tell me?" she asked, breathless.

"Do you have to wait for him?" Maybe I could fix at least this. If not anything else...than at least this.

"I wanted to respect his wishes." She wiped her tears away on the sleeve of her kimono. I knelt to the ground to pick up the abandoned gems, handing them to her. She looked at those stones in disgust and with a burst of ki they froze...and then shattered, twinkling like stars.

"If you both hold out for the other to mention something...you'll be waiting a very long time."

She sighed, "I know." She rose from the floor then, smoothing out her kimono. She bowed to me and whispered a quick thank you before shuffling out the way she'd came.

I hoped I had given her some things to dwell on. Perhaps I would make her change her mind. I'd like to witness that small bit of happiness come into being. They both deserved to share in a little joy.

I stared down at the cooling plate of food, wishing once again that things could go back to how they once were.

. . .

Several days passed where I spent my time doing menial chores for Genkai. Junk needed to be cleaned from the closets. Cobwebs needed to be swept from the unused rooms. All the games in her "game room" needed to be polished. The list went on. And a lot of it was tiring. But it kept my mind off of things and for that I was grateful.

My mood, however, did not improve. Especially when Kurama chose to stay as well. He watched my every move, always around when I didn't want him to be. I didn't know what his agenda was but it was becoming a nuisance.

So one day, while I was hand scrubbing the floor in one of the dojos, I stopped mid scrub and whirled on him. "Is my cleaning technique particularly interesting or have you imprinted on me, fox?"

He was leaning against the wall farthest from me, arms crossed over his chest and an insipid smile on his face. A flash of teeth and narrowing of his eyes was the only sign he gave that my comments displeased him. "I must say no on both accounts."

"You could have fooled me," I said, going back to scrubbing.

"You share more qualities with your sister than I had realized."

He was testing me. Especially by calling her that. He knew what I was and now he was playing dumb. If he thought stalking me would whittle me down he was sorely mistaken. I had learned from the best on how to hide my true feelings and thoughts. I had a mental barrier that rivaled that of the best psychics in the world. He would not - could not - break me. I'd already been broken too many times. All that remained were pieces. There was little else he could do.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, but Kasumi is the exact opposite of me."

"Oh yes, the sweet, gentle, weak little girl you have pretended to be all these years. How could I have forgotten."

"I was all those things. I am no longer. People change."

"Yes, people change. People that have souls and bodies not made of sand."

A bit back the rage that swelled through me. It would do me no good to fight him. I would be playing straight into his hands. I needed him to keep his mouth shut. No one else needed to know. It would ruin everything, just as it did in the future.

I wrung the cloth in my hands out, twisting it like I would like to have twisted Kurama's neck. The next thing I knew he was at my back, hands held steady on my shoulders. The weight he put into it pinned my knees to the floor and he leaned over my shoulder so he may whisper into my ear.

"Tell me what you saw the other day."

"For someone who prides himself on intelligence you can be awfully stupid."

"Stupid? Oh no. That isn't the word for it. Protective is what you're searching for."

"Be that as it may, I still can't tell you. It's none of your business anyway."

"So it was about Hiei then…"

How he'd deduced that from the little I'd told him I would never know. I was smart, smarter than Kasumi, but I knew for all my intelligence Kurama had at least twice as much as me. His many years of life contributed to that, but it wasn't the only reason. I despised him for this, for the knowledge he carried. Because even though I could see into the future and knew many things others did not, there was still so much I didn't know. I hated that. I hated it to my very core.

I made a decision then. Perhaps one that would only screw things up further. I prayed that it wouldn't, that I could manage to do even a single thing right. Because since I'd started my mission I had failed in almost all regards. Every time something changed I saw it, but I had not changed it for the better...and in many cases I'd made things worse.

Hiei cutting off a piece of their thread was a testament to that.

I threw the cloth back into the bucket, pushing with all my might to make Kurama move. He did so with only a little resistance. Then I turned to him and said, "Sit."

He raised an eyebrow but I just gestured to the floor. "We don't have much time, please."

He obeyed, sitting much the same as I, with knees tucked beneath him. I didn't wait for questions or acknowledgement that he was even listening. "What I am about to tell you can't leave this room. If you break this promise I will have to do something to fix it...and that something could be drastic."

"Life or death drastic?"

"That...or worse. I'm doing this in the hopes that I can change even one thing. But it's a big thing. The biggest. And without your cooperation everything will be ruined."

"Will you tell me why you seem to hate me so much?"

I stared at him. Why did that matter right now? "I don't hate you."

"Will you tell me what I did in the future to make you hate future me, then?" he clarified.

I pursed my lips, annoyed. "Fine. But just sit there and listen, don't ask questions."

"Alright…"

Just as I was about to speak, to tell him all the things that had dwelled on me for so damn long...the door sliding open had me snapping my mouth shut. Standing their was Keiko, dressed for spring in a knee length dress and half sleeved sweater.

Perhaps this was for the best…

She'd paused when she'd noticed I was also present, because it was obvious she'd come looking for Kurama. But a minute later the surprise faded and she snubbed me in favor of him.

"We've been looking for you. Koenma's here, he has some news he wishes to tell us."

"Ah, I'll be right there Keiko-chan. Just give me a moment."

She looked like she wanted to argue but she only nodded and made to leave. But I was on my feet before she could. I bowed to both of them and then said to her, "We were done here anyway. He's all yours."

Kurama shot up, hand outstretched as if to stop me. But he took a single look at Keiko and changed his mind. His eyes told me he would search for me later...that I wouldn't get out of telling him then no matter who interrupted. So I just nodded, imperceptible, and left the room.

The soft patter of feet behind me didn't make me stop. The hand on my arm, gentle but insistent, might not have either. But I didn't have the energy to pretend she didn't exist. Some might find it easier to do than have an actual conversation...but it wasn't. It took effort...like finding places to hide...or having to listen to someone talk and talk until you blew up at them.

"What can I do for you, Keiko-san?"

"Koenma asked for you to be there too."

I nodded, "Anything else?"

She looked to the floor, debating what to say next. I stared at her with a raised eyebrow. I didn't know what the girl wanted but I doubted I'd have the time for whatever nonsense it was going to be.

"You were right the other day," she said. "I act different around Kasumi-chan."

"I know," I said.

"Well, no need for you to be so smug about it."

I had no reply other than a shrug. I didn't feel the need to deny things that were true. And I did not sugar coat those truths either. It was good she knew, but it was what she planned to do with that knowledge that truly counted.

Her yes drifted back down the hall, Kurama hadn't been far behind us and he was waiting at a respectable distance. However, I knew he had the hearing of the youko, so I grabbed Keiko's hand and proceeded towards the kitchen. I could sense that people were there...their energies nervous, tantamount frenetic. I knew nothing good would come of Koenma's visit.

I kept a firm hold on Keiko's hand and though she was at first stunned, she went along with me with nary a misstep. She continued speaking as I marched her down Master Genkai's vast hallways.

"When I realized the life Kasumi had...and her...circumstances," she whispered the word as if it were a sin, "I just...I don't know. It triggered the mother hen in me."

"She can take care of herself," I said. I kept my eyes straight ahead, listening to Keiko with half an ear. Why were they all so agitated? What didn't I know?

"I realize that…" she clammed up for a moment before taking a deep breath, "I wanted to be that sister she needed to protect and take care of. I wanted to fill that void that you created."

I stopped before the kitchen doorway, the muted voices inside intelligible to my ears. I had to come up with a quick response for Keiko. I really didn't have time to listen to things I already knew. But she was baring a part of herself to me. That deserved some kind of respect.

"I think you aren't that person Kasumi seems to think you are," she said.

I smiled bitterly. "Yes...and no. I was once that naive, lighthearted little girl she remembers."

"What changed? What could have possibly happened for something so drastic?"

I looked her dead in the eye and without preamble I told her, "I traveled twenty years into the future...and saw the aftermath of the ending of the worlds."

"Is it...is it that awful?"

"There is but one standing city left, if that tells you anything."

She sucked in a sharp breath. "A single city? Out of all three worlds?"

I nodded, "There is no more heaven or hell or Reikai. Demon world is non-existent. They stood stalwart in the Ningenkai. And they lost."

I threw open the door to Master Genkai's kitchen, leaving Keiko stunned into silence behind me. Everyone stopped and stared. But I just strode to Koenma and waited for my orders. He was my master now, after all.

"Do you know why I'm here?" he asked.

I shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest. I was annoyed. And he should know it. He was the reason I was stuck here. I could run...I could choose to leave if I wanted to. It was just in my best interest to stay. When Kasumi returned however…

Koenma chuckled, "I know something you don't for once."

I glared at him, unimpressed.

He held his hands up in defense. "Sorry, but it's a little funny."

"If it is so funny...why are you so nervous?"

This took the wind out of his sails. "You can sense that, huh?"

I nodded and he mumbled, "Of course you can…" Then he cleared his throat and turned to the room at large. "As some of you may know, my father, King Enma has died."

Besides Genkai, Botan and Kurama, the rest hadn't a clue. An uproar ensued, led mainly by Kazuma whose voice was the loudest of the bunch.

"Enough, enough! I know this comes as a shock, but that isn't the main point here!"

"But...this is serious, right?! Shouldn't we wait for Urameshi to come back?"

"I'll tell Yusuke when they return, until then I'm telling all of you." He turned back to me, placing a hand on my shoulder I neither needed or appreciated. "That means Hitomi-san and Kasumi-san are now my wards."

"Property, is more like," I mumbled. Koenma shot me a sidelong glance, which I ignored.

"But the main reason I'm here is because I have some news…"

I shrugged his hand off me then and before he could even open his mouth I answered for him. "Hideki has made a move."

"Shit," I heard Kazuma hiss.

Keiko shifted in the seat she'd chosen to occupy, wringing her hands, "That same guy that chased us that day? The guy at the tournament?"

"It's okay, the boys will handle it Keiko," said Botan with confidence.

Keiko's eyes snapped to her and she placed her hands on the kitchen table so she'd stop fidgeting. "We can't leave it up to just them."

"What do you mean? You think we can't take that scumbag out?"

"No, Kuwa-kun, that isn't what I mean. We should all work together. I feel like it's more important than ever that we do."

"What's important is keeping all of you safe," spoke up Kurama.

"Safe? And who will be protecting all of you?! Who will keep you safe?!"

"Keiko's right! We might not be tough like all of you boys, but we can manage just fine!"

"Enough!" hollered Genkai. "You know how you lot can be useful? Keep your mouths shut and do as you're told."

"But Master Genkai - "

"I know Botan…I know that you all feel helpless and worried. But now is not the time."

I had tuned most of their petty spat out. I was too focused on Koenma's words. Because Hideki had made a move. He had come out of hiding. Which meant only one thing…

"You need me to track him." It wasn't a question. I had known as soon as he'd spoken what he wanted from me.

Silence fell. The argument with the girls long forgotten. Koenma smiled at me, a little sad, but also resigned. "Yes. You are the only one that can."

It was why I had released him from Purgatory. Why I had broken the seals that held him. His astral projection could not be killed...but his flesh and blood body could. I had pretended for months to be his ally. That I had been scorned by Kasumi and that I wanted revenge. He'd been disappointingly easy to deceive.

Or so I had thought. And what he had also made everyone else think.

But in the madness of that day during the tournament, Hideki had made off with my half of the gold pendent both Kasumi and I had shared a piece of. Months earlier he'd stolen Kasumi's after destroying our childhood home.

They weren't just jewelry. He would use those to find the exact location for the ritual. And then he'd turn around and use them on both of us. There would be no place we could hide, not in all of the three worlds.

"If I do as you ask we will be playing right into his hands," I said.

"That's a risk I have to take. If we don't know what he's planning for his next move we won't know how to defend ourselves."

He thought this was a lesser of two evils…

"In two weeks you will bring those three back. And then I need you to go. Even that is more time than I would prefer."

I bit my lip. I wasn't afraid to take on this mission. But if Hideki found me before I found him…

"Oh and one more thing," Koenma dug around the inside of his robes and produced an envelope. "Ren left this for Kasumi. Will you give it to her?"

"Why not you?" I asked.

"I'm too busy with all the changes taking place. Please, it was important to him."

I pursed my lips but took it anyway. I folded it and slipped it into a pocket.

"Now, if you'd excuse us Hitomi-san…" Koenma gestured to the door, "I have to discuss some things with everyone in private."

Things I was not privy to. Things about the Reikai and this group he thought I did not need to know.

Well jokes on him…

I knew fucking everything.

. . .

A/N: Okay, so maybe everyone is starting to put some pieces about Hitomi together. If not, by getting to the end of this chapter I decided I would write one more in her POV and that will be the last one. Her final "confrontation" with Kurama still needs to occur after all. Next chapter is back to Hiei (and it will skip back in time, because the timeline with Hitomi is a bit ahead). Leave me some love! Thanks for reading!

And thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed, faved, and stuck around to continue reading this mess! I love all of you!