Disclaimer: I am not the owner of Fairy Tail

By the time another knock came to the door, Zeref had at least managed to calm himself to the point of no longer crying. Instead, he had been meditating, calming himself while trying to rationally consider his new situation. Really, Levy had been the one to bring him back. Did that mean he was forgiven? Or was she still angry with him? She had looked rather angered before she collapsed, but if she was angry, why save him? Either way, he at least hoped this meant that whatever damage he had done to their meager relationship was repairable.

"Come in." Zeref turned away, not really caring who it was. However, that was before he remembered that Levy was in Vistarion. Turning back, he saw her standing in the doorway, with August by her side. She looked like he remembered, more energetic and lively than she had been after performing the enchantment on him. "It is good to see you've recovered, Levy." He paused, frowning for a moment. "I suppose I should also welcome you to Vistarion, but from what I've gathered, this likely is not your first time here." He glanced towards August, who shook his head.

Rubbing the back of her own head, Levy smiled faintly at him. "Actually, I never came here. I kinda came up with a quick excuse to avoid that…I really don't think I would have been able to learn the layout of a massive castle like this quick enough to pull that off." Zeref nodded, uncertain of what else to add. "But…that's not really why I came here. See…I wanted to apologize." For what? Zeref frowned at her, uncertain of what she had done. "Yelling at you like that…I didn't mean for you to take it so seriously. Really, I was just…upset that you could threaten us so easily. I mean…you had just…" She glanced towards August, biting her lip. She was gripping her arm tightly, and she seemed to squirm where she was standing.

He had not expected this. Staring at her, he felt an odd warmth in his chest. He wasn't able to stop himself from smiling ever so slightly at her, shaking his head and turning away. "That's quite alright. It isn't as if you said anything untrue about me."

"But I did!" She glared at him, crossing her arms over her chest. "You aren't really that bad, Zeref. What I said was said out of anger and kind of without thought…"

"Yet I still am the villain history makes me out to be." He shrugged, having gotten rather used to the idea. "I do kill, and I do end up doing so with little guilt, all things considered. Perhaps there are times when that changes…but I've grown used to the guilt enough that it is…easy to ignore, in some ways."

"You make such claims, but if you believed that to be true, we would not have been needed to return to Edolas in order to ensure you came back." August had a valid point, which made Zeref frown faintly. Always, August had been able to read him better than the others. "You would not have fled to hide in your room when your magic began to act beyond your control again. Despite you wishing to act as if you are free of guilt, it still weighs on you every day."

Usually, August wouldn't object so much about such things. Then again, usually August was trying to hide his status as Zeref's son. He should have realized some things would change slightly between them as a result. In fact, he should have wanted and welcomed such a change. "Perhaps. Does it really matter, though?" He looked at them, sighing. "I'm back, and you are well. I suspect that means things will be returning to…normal."

She stared at him, biting her lip. "Are…are you better though? I mean…you just tried to find a rather unusual way to kill yourself."

He supposed he had. Then again, didn't August say something else about what she had learned? "I don't think I will ever quite be that well…though, August has informed me that you've gone out and discovered some interesting information on your own. He claims my curse never bothered you once, despite you taking my place for some time."

Levy nodded, her eyes growing wide. "Wait…he told you about that?"

"Of course. Why would I avoid giving him the news that you can alleviate his curse?" August looked rather confused, but Levy actually looked slightly pale.

"Because…because it was just a theory…" She trailed off, while Zeref smiled at her.

"A theory is far more than what I have at the moment. Given the difficulty of locating any information on this curse, I suspected your idea came from an unusual source."

She nodded, looking away. "It…you…you might be better off…not knowing." She had grown very quiet, and for a moment, Zeref wondered if he had heard her wrong. What theory did she have that was worse than the curse itself? If it ended the deaths that constantly surrounded him, he couldn't imagine why it was a bad thing for him to learn.

Then again, wasn't this the Curse of Contradictions? It seemed oddly fitting for it to end in a tragic way. Did he want to suffer more, if it meant he would be freed of this? Based on Levy's concern, he had no doubt that it would cause him some sort of discomfort to know. Perhaps it was impossible to eliminate the curse. Perhaps it was something else. Either way, it would not be good news.

After some debate, he turned back towards her and nodded. "I…I've suffered with this for quite some time, Levy. In this world, I cannot get any closer to you than I am now…for any living thing near me will perish in an instant. The more I care for life, the more living things around me die…the more I suffer, and the more I dream of an impossible wish for death." She stiffened, but didn't interrupt. "If I care little for life, perhaps I have control…but I also isolate myself and become what history makes me out to be. Unless I become a great villain, I cannot escape this suffering…so if it takes further pain to move past this, I will endure it."

Still, Levy seemed hesitant. She glanced around the room, studying their surroundings for a moment. "And you won't impulsively do something stupid again when you realize you can die again, right?"

"Both you and August are here. I'm certain that between the two of you, one of you could manage to restrain me from doing something so rash." He glanced towards Levy, feeling that same warmth fill him again. This would give him a chance at least, for that future he had contemplated while in that lacrima. "Plus, I think I just may have something of my own to focus on…that should at least limit such impulsive actions."

"I fail to see what is so concerning about ending his curse as well." August frowned at her, while Levy looked away. "Just what is your theory in the first place?"

"Well…I don't think we should quite start there." She glanced towards Zeref, taking a deep breath. "How much do you know about the subconscious use of magic?"

She really had taken an unusual route to researching this, hadn't she? Smiling, Zeref clasped his hands together in his lap, leaning against the wall of his room. "Nearly any wizard can accomplish it, and the capabilities of subconscious magic are quite unexpected. Impossible spells become possible, if the wizard utilizing them is unaware that they are actually casting them in the first place. Within reason, of course. A certain…grasp of magical concepts are required for more intricate subconscious spells, but the overall concept remains true."

"Exactly." Levy looked away, frowning for a moment. "So…this is where it might get a bit uncomfortable. You really don't have to answer if you don't want to…but did anyone tell you that you'd be punished for bringing Natsu back?"

"Everyone did." He frowned, slowly starting to see what she was trying to imply, though. "My instructors claimed Ankhseram, the god of life and death, would grow upset over interfering with such magic. But…that does not necessarily mean I created the curse." Really, he would never do something so insane to himself. Would he? Then, he found what he could use. "Mavis received the same curse, so clearly it isn't such a case."

"But she didn't suffer from her curse until after you told her it was Ankhseram's Curse." Levy's voice was gentle, but still there to correct him. Zeref's eyes were wide, his mind racing to find something else to use against her. "And back then, you already felt guilty, didn't you? You are trying so hard now to bring your family back…it just speaks to how you blame yourself for losing them. You don't try to mend your relationship with Natsu because you don't think you can…or maybe, it's because you don't think you deserve to. Some part of you thought you deserved to be punished, Zeref…and your instructors implied it would happen, so this is the result."

"But…but why this? Any numerous styles of magic would have—"

"But you were told Ankhseram would punish you…and in the stories, which were published that long ago I might add, Ankhseram's curse always caused uncontrollable death magic."

Zeref could feel his body shaking. August was silent, his eyes wide at what Levy was saying. However, Zeref wasn't watching either of them. He didn't notice how Levy had started to kneel in front of him, growing quiet as she watched him. He didn't notice how August was still processing the information. No, all he could see were the few faces he remembered of his victims. He saw the people he had killed, supposedly because of a lack of control. However, that was also nothing but a lie. He had cursed himself. All of those deaths…the ones he coped with by telling himself there had been no other way to save them, he had been lying. He had intentionally given himself this curse, and as a result, he had intentionally killed everyone with this power. It didn't matter if it was a subconscious spell or not, he should have known that it was his own doing.

Something warm touched his hand, making him freeze. Zeref's eyes flashed up, seeing Levy's own brown eyes softening as she stared at him. "I'm sorry…I didn't want to tell you. I knew you'd…you'd feel worse like this. You don't deserve to suffer more…but I just…it was the only explanation that made sense. Edo-Zeref and myself…we weren't affected because subconscious spells only affect the person who created them."

He knew that much from Mavis' illusionary friend Zera. No one was able to see her other than Mavis, much like no one felt his curse other than himself. Still, didn't this mean awareness was the end of it? He could already feel the clarity of his mind, given the absence of the pounding headache that was always growing in him. Levy was grasping his hand, her skin soft against his own, and she was not dying. All of the signs said it was gone now, yet he didn't want it to be true. He didn't want to be that much more responsible for all of it, for all of his past. Tears were falling from his eyes, and he realized that she was right to be concerned. He didn't want this suffering at all. For a moment, he wanted to find a weapon to end it all right now, since it should be possible.

Yet, there was that hand on his. Levy was gentle, someone who cared about him regardless. She knew that he had done this to himself, so why was she still willing to forgive him? He looked up at her, feeling oddly broken and desperate for something. "Thank you for telling me." His voice was quiet, almost monotone. Inhaling deeply, he closed his eyes, turning over his hand to grasp hers tightly. "Don't…don't let me be alone, August, Levy. I…I don't think I can trust myself for a while." He knew it was not something he should have requested of her, but he didn't want it to be someone other than her. He needed Levy by his side right now, even if she only did so out of concern as a friend. Staring at her hand clasped in his own, he found there was a slight warmth spreading through his hand from where her skin rested against his own. He could let her use him as she saw fit, so long as he could find moments like this and pretend they meant something more than they did.

So, I've finished rewriting the end of the new arc and have pieced together all of the new draft. I was curious about its length...and for those of you who have read my other stories, the draft of this story is only a few hundred words shorter than Karma of Contradictions, which had been my longest FT story by nearly 100k words before this. So, expect a long story here, since this one will be over 300k when I finish it.

As for this chapter, I do hope this clarifies some of the confusion you guys had on the theory of Zeref's curse for this story. He subconsciously cursed himself, rather than just subconsciously used magic when he valued life, if that makes sense. I really was trying to model this style of magic off of Zera, but I guess I didn't quite explain it well initially and caused a little bit of confusion. Either way, Zeref now knows about all of this, and his emotional moods are to follow soon. Feel free to review and tell me what you think!