Ch. 12 Billy Let The Dogs Out
Well, this was awkward.
Sam and Edward had been staring at one another for a good three minutes without blinking, jaws clenched, low growls emanating from their chests. It was like the world's highest stakes staring competition, and here I was having to pretend that I had no clue what the hell was going on. I mean, I supposed I could just tell Sam that I knew what was going on, but I didn't really want to go through the whole "I'm a body hopper from another world where you're about as real as Austin Powers" speech. Wait, did the Austin Powers' movies exist here? I'd have to ask Alice later...
Edward had himself positioned slightly in front of me, in a protective gesture. "Ahem." I peaked around Edward and looked pointedly at Sam who had not spoken since we had exited the house. "Excuse me, but do you two know each other?" I played dumb trying to hurry this along. Speak, boy.
Sam Uley was tall, like duck through doorways and still might hit his head, tall. His body was matured, filled out like a pro wrestler, but his face had a youthful quality to it. He was only supposed to be like 19, right? I could tell that identifying the boys who had either phased already or were about to do so later on would be fairly easy if they all shared these traits.
Sam seemed to start at the sound of me as if he forgot there was a human present. He twisted his foot in the gravel drive, looking down and remaining awkwardly silent for a second too long. I guess he didn't know how to handle me. Figures. I don't know how to handle myself most days. "Oh...Uhh...no. Isabella Swan? I'm Sam, Sam Uley. I'm here to bring you home. Billy said you might need some help." He looked at me meaningfully. Well that was sweet of him, but totally misplaced.
Of course Billy sent you. Good old prejudiced Uncle Billy. I guess I couldn't really blame Billy for his biases, though. I mean, before I came to terms with this new life, hadn't I also feared intertwining my life so closely with the Cullens? Though that had more to do with trying to avoid Bella Swan's inevitable danger magnetism, but still. Yes. Yes, I had. Kettle? Meet Pot.
"Thanks, but I'm fine, really. Alice and Edward were just about to take me home." I smiled politely.
"Bella, why don't you go to the car with Alice? I will be there in just a minute." Edward spoke through his teeth. I looked up to Edward's face. It was borderline murderous. Uh oh. This could be bad. Jasper, Esme, and Carlisle had left just before this little meeting was announced, so if anything began between them, it was up to me and Alice to stop it, not that she would let me try, and clearly my humaness was not the most helpful quality in this situation.
Sam squared his shoulders. "The girl comes with me." His eyes grew cold when they looked back into Edward's. His body was shaking slightly. He was not relenting in this. The 'girl?' Was this guy for real? Screw that.
Edward pushed me further behind him when I didn't immediately leave. Would it have been safer for me to move out of the way of the soon to be phasing werewolf? Sure. But was I going to sit here and play damsel in distress? Hell no. Ok, yes, I might depending on wether it would help ease the tension or not. I took a step back to appease Edward a little bit who's fingers were so tightly balled up at his sides now that he looked like he might be digging holes in his palms.
"Your services are unnecessary, Sam." Edward spit his name out as if it were a curse word. "As she has already told her father, we are more than happy to bring her home. You are keeping her from doing such as we speak. If you would be so kind as to move, we will be on our way." Edward's eyes were black as coal, and looked like they could have pierced right through Sam if he wanted. Sam's old green Suburban sat right in the center of the Cullen's driveway effectively blocking our way out.
"Sorry, That's not happening, and that reminds me. There's something I need to address with you and...the others." Sam's eyes narrowed, shifted to me, and back to Edward.
"I know exactly what you have come to discuss, and we are aware. Nothing has changed. We have the same understanding as before." Edward's tone was sharp.
Sam's eyebrow quirked up in question as, I'm sure, he tried to figure out how exactly Edward knew what he was going to say, but he continued nonetheless. "And the girl?" He flexed his biceps, his whole body visibly shaking now. Hello? Am I invisible? Douchebag.
"The GIRL is standing right here, in case you forgot," Sam's eyes widened like he really had forgotten that I was still here. "And I will decide who I travel with. I don't mean to be rude, but come on, Sam. I don't even know you. Why would I get in a car with you? Haven't you ever heard of stranger danger? And, anyway, the Cullens have been nothing but lovely, so if you'll excuse us, I'm tired and ready to go home. Please send Billy my regards. Now you boys make nice and shake hands, so we can be done with whatever drama you have going on here." I was using my nurse voice. The same one I used when a semi-aggressive patient didn't want to comply with their plan of care. Working in downtown Atlanta, I learned long ago that using a casual voice with just the perfect balance of annoyance, impatience, and authority, could usually get the job done.
They each turned to look at me as if I had suddenly grown a second nose out of my forehead. "Go on." I put my hands on my hips, and raised my brow, but neither moved, each standing their ground, unwavering. Ugh they're just two stupid teenage boys. Vampire or werewolf...Human or supernatural...it doesn't make a difference. I shook my head.
I was growing tired of waiting around for them to get some sense on their own, so I walked right around Edward and stood between he and Sam, ignoring as Edward stiffened and tried to move himself back between me and wolf boy. Oh, no you don't.
They had slowly moved closer and closer to one another during their staring contest, so I reached out and snatched one of each of their hands in mine to both of their surprises.
"If you're going to act like children, I will treat you as such." I knew that neither of them would show their full strength in front of me because Sam didn't know that I was aware of his phasing abilities, nor did he know that I was equally aware of the fact that I was standing in front of a vampire. To keep up the ruse, neither one could behave any way but as a human in front of me, so I was able to force their hands—one burning up and the other icy cold—together long enough for a quick shake.
I smirked to myself...Human one, wolf and vampire, zero. "There. All better. Goodbye, Sam." I released their hands, rolling my eyes when they each jerked their hands back and took a couple of steps away from one another with looks of absolute revolt on their faces, and I walked over to the silver Volvo Alice had just backed out of the garage.
There it was...The Volvo, the true star of the Twilight Saga. I had seen the immaculately detailed car at school parked in the lot, but this was the closest I had ever actually been to it. I walked along the outside of the car, running my finger softly along the trim. I couldn't believe I was going to get to ride in it. Best day ever. Well, best day unless you accounted for me almost being killed by Rosalie, but that was just a typical day in Twilight world at this point.
"If you scratch it, I might have to charge you." Edward's velvety smooth voice whispering right into my ear simultaneously made me jump and gave me goosebumps.
"Ohmygod!" I huffed out. I hadn't noticed that Sam's SUV was long gone.
"That's for making me have skin to skin contact with the dog. I'm never going to get that smell off of me." He wrinkled his nose in disgust and rubbed his hand against his khakis.
"Well then don't act like two jerks in a pissing match next time." I shrugged.
"Next time?" Edward scoffed, but opened my door for me. Such a gentleman...
"Thanks...But come on. There was a whole newborn vampire army that came after Bella in the third book. You really think you guys can take that on your own? You might need the wolves on your side one day." I said as I climbed into the car.
"Excuse me?!" Alice shrieked.
"What?" Edward growled as he climbed in the driver's seat and slammed the door behind him. He turned to face me in the back from the driver's seat, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I'm starting to understand why you were so desperate to leave this world that you tried to end your life..." Edward said through clenched teeth. "Are there any other threats that we should know about? Do meteors strike the Earth? Is there also an extra terrestrial invasion?" Well now he was just being silly. Or was he? Oh God, what if there were aliens here too? Does vampire trump alien?!
"No, nothing major. The full Volturi guard shows up at the end, but that's only because of Irina. I think as long as we keep Laurent away from her, she won't have any grudges against you."
"Oh, JUST the full Volturi guard? Is that all?" Cool it with the sarcasm, dude. Though, his anger made his nostrils flare in a very alluring way...shut up, Iris. I pulled my lips closed tightly.
"I told you we just have to keep Irina out of this." ...And avoid creating a human-vampire baby, but that did not seem like a real threat currently...sigh.
"Irina?" Alice questioned. "What does she have to do with this?"
"She gets her feelings hurt by something that I think we can prevent from happening." I shrugged.
"Your oversimplification of this very obvious problem astounds me. How you stay so calm in the face of danger is beyond me." Edward ranted.
"Well, when you have spent the last eight and half years of your life watching people die from crazy shit like I have, and then combine that with the realization that this world doesn't really care a whole lot about how hard I have tried to avoid danger, and you might be as resigned to death as me too!" I snapped, but immediately adjusted my tone. That was uncalled for. "Sorry." I didn't realize that I felt that way until I said it aloud. Maybe my death was imminent here. I mean, how many young, overall healthy people had I seen die in the ER and ICU from accidents, gun violence, partner domestic abuse...? Was I really better than any of those innocent people? No...But at least I had the world's greatest protectors on my side now, and the gift of kind of knowing the basic outline of events to come.
Edward sat quietly waiting until I met his eyes, obviously watching my expression shift as I had my own personal epiphany about my human morbidity. His eyes and voice softened when he responded. "Iris, I told you that we wouldn't let anything happen to you. Do you truly have so little faith in us?" He asked in earnest.
I looked down at my lap. "No, it isn't about your capabilities at all. Its just...When you were with Bella, you said many times that you felt the odds were stacked against you both. There was danger at every turn. There was never a moment of peace or even just boredom. Which I suppose wouldn't exactly make for a good best-seller, but now that I'm living here, what if that's just my new normal? What if I can't just hang out with Charlie or go out with friends...or date..." I trailed off at the end, not wanting to say too much, which I feared I already had.
Edward frowned to himself, doing his typical self-loathing, brooding thing no doubt. "I promise we won't let that be your life. You deserve a normal, happy, healthy, long-lasting human existence."
My heart sped at his words, anxiety consuming me instantly. "Hey! Don't you dare think about leaving!" I turned to Alice. "Don't let him do it, Alice! I'll quite literally die. When you guys left in the book, more bad stuff happened while you were gone. It only made things worse for Bella because her vampire protectors weren't there to save her anymore. Don't. Do. It. Do you hear me?" I was panicking. I couldn't even think about how I would miss seeing his crooked smile, or how I wouldn't get to go with Alice and 'shop til we dropped.' All I could see was Victoria and Laurent taunting me.
Edward looked shocked at my manic state.
Alice slid into the back seat, despite the car being in motion and held my hand. "We aren't leaving, Iris. Don't worry. You're like family now. I can see it." Family? What did she mean by that?
Like, Follow, and Review please and thank you! :)