Ch. 23 Dawgnappers
"So let me get this straight. You knew that you had a shellfish allergy, but you ordered shrimp for dinner?" The older nurse looked at me in condescension over the rim of her glasses which had fallen down the bridge of her nose.
"I took them out of the shell first." I said as I tried not to lose it. There were tears building in my eyes, and my cheeks hurt from literally biting back the laughter that was on the brink of bursting through. Edward wasn't doing as well. He was coughing to cover up how hard he was really laughing. The nurse turned to glare at him, and left the room.
"For the record, I'm not happy about this."
"Not happy about what?" Edward was still laughing as I scrunched up my face.
"Being back in the ER. We were having such a good time. Things were finally getting better, and now I find out that I can never have shrimp again? What other secrets was Bella hiding?!"
"Iris, I'm so sorry. I never reviewed your allergies with you the last time you were here." Carlisle said as he entered the room looking over my discharge papers, he was genuinely distraught when I arrived a few hours earlier. It wasn't his fault though. Only I would have the luck of having an unknown shellfish allergy.
"Well, the last time I was here, you didn't know that I wasn't Isabella Swan, so how would you know that you needed to tell me. Plus, it's my fault for never asking. I guess there's more to this story than I considered. Any other conditions I should know about? Did she donate her kidney? Or maybe she ate her twin in the womb?"
Edward chuckled to himself. "I never know what you're going to say. It used to frustrate me all the time—it still does sometimes—but for the most part, it's incredibly refreshing."
"I'm glad to entertain you." I rolled my eyes in jest with a sigh.
Edward moved close to me. "You do more than entertain me." My heart thrummed like a hummingbird's wings.
"Edward. Your father is present." I breathed.
"Right. Excuse me Carlisle. Iris and I need to be getting on with our date."
"No, nothing significant that I can see here, Iris. Carry on." He laughed as he walked out.
"I think I ruined the date already." I said in a sad voice. Stupid Bella and her stupid shrimp allergy. How many possible ways were there for a human to potentially die anyway? I think I had illustrated most of them pretty nicely so far. With that thought I sighed.
"No, not the best part." A wicked grin spread across his face, and he looked at me through his thick dark lashes.
"Which is?" What is he thinking? His eyes are darker...I thought he wanted to stay a virgin...oh Edward...Wait, I don't want any hybrid babies right now!
"The stolen kiss goodnight, of course." He said in a rough whisper. Oh right. Get your head out of the gutter, Iris. Well, that will do...for now.
"You don't have to steal it. It's yours." I whispered back, and he smiled as he moved even closer yet to "steal" a kiss.
The next day, Thursday, was a school day, but I didn't have school thanks to my own stupidity. Never stoop to their level, Iris. Just because you look like a teenager, doesn't mean you have to act like one...
The Cullens had to attend school to keep up pretenses because they already missed yesterday. This weekend would be sunny, so they were skipping Friday too.
A whole day to myself...this spare time was never a good thing. I should just stay in the house, and not do anything stupid. You're a danger magnet, remember? Stay here and read or clean or something...The beep of receiving a text message pulled me out of my thoughts. It was Edward. That boy was obsessed with me, but I'm not complaining.
Are you ok? Alice said you looked bored.
Tell her to stop looking. It's creepy, and yes, having loads of fun without you. A party, really.
Don't have too much fun. We all know what happens when you get creative.
I'll try to contain myself.
Please do. Love you
Come get me please...
Really?
No, I'll be fine...I guess...Love you
I smiled to myself. Now what? That conversation took all of two minutes. I could TV surf...I had never been one to watch a lot of TV though. I had only recently been watching games with Charlie. Hmm...a walk? Could I go outside without tripping on something? Surely that could be fine...sure, a walk. My phone beeped again.
Don't do it. I saw you fall down into the creek. You'll break your wrist, but more importantly you'll stain that cute top you're wearing! Stay home!
How is ruining my shirt worse than a broken wrist??
Carlisle will fix your wrist, but the shirt was one of a kind! I found it at this sweet little boutique.
Alice...I laughed and closed my phone. Ok, so no walk. TV it is then...
I had just gotten comfortable when my phone beeped from Alice again AND the doorbell rang. What the...?
Iris? What happened?
What do you mean?
I opened the door just in time to see a tall muscular man with a dark olive complexion and cropped black hair, only wearing shorts, reach in to grab me, causing me to drop my phone when he pulled me under his arm. A wolf. What the fucking hell?
"Who the he—" He covered my mouth before I could finish.
"Sorry, Bella. We have to protect you from them." His voice was deep, and he spoke in a short, clipped tone. He was here on official business it would seem. I tried to bite him, but nothing. No response. I would hurt myself before I could hurt any of the wolves.
He jumped in the back of a white van with no license plates. Very original...
There were no seats, and therefore no seatbelts, so I slid around as the van careened around every corner it took. The unidentified wolf had let go of me once the doors slammed closed, but he sat with his back against the doors, so there was no way I could pass.
I growled to myself...apparently picking up the habit from the Cullens. "Which one are you?" I asked in a bored tone. This was the second time I had been captured by the "good" guys and it was getting really old.
He narrowed his eyes for a moment as if trying to size me up. This was Jared. Paul would have had some stupid, but snide comment he pulled out of his ass. "Jared then."
"How do you know who I am?" He snarled.
"You were sent on Alpha orders, right? Who's driving? Sam?" I said ignoring his question.
"How do you know so much?" He questioned again, seeming to shake more the longer I spoke to him. Back off, Iris. There's no way out and you're with a baby werewolf.
"I'll tell you if you take me back." I hoped I wasn't pushing him to the limit yet.
The van came to a screeching halt. I had to grab the wall to keep from flying into Jared. I jumped up, and tried to move to look past Jared's head to see what had happened. Then the double back doors flung open, and I smiled.
"Hello, Emmett." I smirked. Jared, who had jumped out of the van when he realized he was confronted with the hulking vampire, now stood wide-eyed.
"Hi, Iris." He waved like a little kid, and then turned to face Jared, stone-faced again. I bit back a smile at the sudden change in his demeanor.
I looked behind Emmett to see Jasper and Sam having their own intense stare down involving lots of growling.
"Where's Edward? Is he pissed? We're not passed the border are we? This was so not worth breaking the treaty over..."
"Cool it. We're not even close..." Emmett answered me. Now I could see that we were just one street over from the school. Well the wolves were certainly not as smart as I thought they would be if they drove right past the school where my mind-reading vampire was...
"Iris." Edward seemingly arrived out of nowhere and breathed a sigh of relief, helping me out past the now-shaking Jared with a growl. "I'll end you, wolf."
He spoke in a menacing tone as he gently pushed me behind him.
"Don't. They thought they were saving me from you guys. They're just misinformed. They didn't hurt me." I said quickly before this turned into a war. There was enough plot-line drama that could still catch up to us to start anything else.
"Iris. They took you against your will." Edward hissed.
"Just for a little joyride. I'm fine."
"Who the hell is Iris? Is that like your code name when you're with the bloodsuckers?" Jared asked past Emmett. Look who got his voice back!
"Ugh. I guess it's story time..."
"What?" Sam asked from twenty feet away. I forgot about them having superhearing too. Man it sucked being the only human around.
"Need your blankies and some hot cocoa, guys?" Emmett said in a baby voice. Gah, sometimes he is so stupid. I love it.
I rolled my eyes with a smile. "Lets go back to Charlie's and talk."
"Like hell will I go anywhere with these leeches." Sam yelled from where Jasper still stood blocking him. Neither Sam nor Jared could phase since there were so many houses around them out here in the open.
"Ok, well if you want answers, tell me where you do want to go, that they—" I gestured to the three vampires around me, "—can also go. If not, then I'll just go back home. Though, I must tell you that you probably want to know who is going to phase next."
Both wolves gasped. Sam pushed past Jasper with a growl, and walked to where Emmett and Edward were blocking me. He stopped about five feet away.
"How would you know that? I figured these leeches told you about us, but how could you know who's next? The psychic said she couldn't see us. That's why we surprised you at home because Charlie mentioned you'd be there all week when I saw him last night." Nice, Dad. I sighed to myself.
"Alice can't see you, but I have my own little quirk about me. It's not...secure...here to talk about this though." I said glancing around. There was a little old lady walking her dog down the sidewalk a couple of houses down who was becoming increasingly interested in what five large boys and one small girl were doing this time of day standing around a creepy kidnapper-looking van.
"I'm fine, ma'am! We're just filming a documentary on kidnappers! Wanna join?" I called to her. She just turned around and practically power-walked away. What? I have to get my kicks somehow.
"Iris, was that necessary?" Edward was pinching his nose again. So cute.
"Yes." I said innocently.
He rolled his eyes with a chuckle, but then growled. "So do you want to talk or not, Dogs." I couldn't help but laugh because it sounded like Edward—my turn of the century originating boyfriend—just called them dawgs. Like "wut-up dawg? Wanna go smoke dope and play on the PS?" I was almost in tears.
"What is going on with you today? Did these, dogs, injure your head again?" Edward sounded concerned as he seriously felt around on my head.
"No...I'm sorry." I tried to calm down, and now Emmett was laughing too. "You just...keep calling them...dogs."
"Yo, dawg. Wanna hang?" Emmett coughed out and was rolling on the ground then too. Jasper even cracked a smile, and Edward just threw his hand up like he was conceding to the crazies around him.
"Meet us or don't at the southern border of Forks and La Push at four. I have to go take care of these children it would seem." Edward said curtly and dragged me away, still in a fit of laughter toward the Volvo.
"Jasper...cut it...out!" I yelled.
•PTaT•
(BPOV)
"Hi, Dad." I tried to force as much enthusiasm into my voice as I could muster.
"Bells, it's good to see you, honey. Was the flight ok?" Charlie pulled me into an awkward side hug.
"Yeah, I guess." I shrugged.
"Don't look so happy to be here. You might strain your face you're smiling so much." Charlie said with raised brows.
"Sorry, Dad. I am happy to see you. Thanks for letting me come. It was just more difficult to leave Mom than I thought it would be." The Closer I got to Forks, I just couldn't get rid of the nagging feeling that I wouldn't see her again anytime soon.
"Well let's go get your bags. I got your room set up already."
"What do you mean? It already had a bed and everything. Right?"
"I got an old desk and computer from Billy for your schoolwork, and some new curtains and bedding that Sue Clearwater helped me pick out, remember her?"
"I guess..." I really needed to be happier about this. It wasn't Charlie's fault that I made the decision to come here, and I really appreciated him welcoming me home.
"Hey, your old man has another surprise for you too."
"What's that?" I asked, my voice thick with suspicion.
"You'll see when we get there." He smiled. What kind of surprise could Forks bring? That was the most boring place on Earth.
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