I can honestly say that baring it all to my mom was the rigyht thing to do. She laughed with me, held my hand when things got sad and most importantly didn't yell at me for all my drinking. Why did I ever think I should hide things from her? She always has my back no matter what and I've really taken that for granted.

I slept like a baby after our conversation. I truly felt free from all the things that had been burdening me. I should have done this earlier. One thing for sure, I would never make the mistake of hiding things from my mom again. I guess its true what they say sometimes all a girl needs is her mom.

I spent the next three days lounging around the house and doing a big share of avoiding. I didn't answer the phone, left text messages unread and my mom answered the door, always using the tired "she's not home" excuse. I knew whomever was on the other side of that door wasn't buying it but they knew better than to second guess my mom so they left. Yeah it hurt to avoid them and it hurt me more to know how much I was hurting them. They would soon realize that my absence was going to bring them closer together and then boom! Bromance was back on track. But damn I missed them. My eyes filled with tears. I've always turned to Jax when I felt low but I would never be able to do that again. On the bright side, maybe somewhere down the line we can be friends again, nowhere near like we used to be, but casual friends. I honestly didn't even know if that was possible but if it was meant to happen it would. I was surprised to realize that I was bummed about missing Ope's wedding. Then again it would probably be better if I wasn't there. It would be easier on both of us that way. I still can't believe I told him that I loved him. It felt odd not keeping it under wraps anymore. It was good though, that it was all out in the open now. I can say that I cleared everything off of my chest. My mom walked into the room drawing me out of my thoughts.

"Honey, Gwen went into labor. I have to go cover the rest of her shift. Are you going to be okay by yourself?" I nodded, shoving a handful of chips into my mouth. My mom walked over and kissed my head.

"Wait,I thought Gwen wasn't due for another month?" She sighed.u

"Yeah her water broke and she's having contractions. So Gabby could be coming early." I nodded and she started towards the door. She looked sad about leaving, but I waved her off.

"Mom, go i'll be fine.l'm just going to watch tv and read. I know you have to work. If I need anything I'll call." She gave me a small smile and then out the door she went. She wasn't gone ten minutes when there was a pounding on the door. I turned my tv up a little to tune out the loud pounding. I repeated to myself that I didn't care who was at the door. I didn't want to see anyone. I need to heal. I closed my eyes and let out a deep breath. I could do this. I opened my eyes and was startled to see a giant with his arms crossed his chest. Great so much for avoiding them.

"What in the hell are you doing Luanne?" I shrugged and shoved my hand into my bag of chips.

"Eating funyons..." I said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You know what the fuck I meant! Why are you avoiding Jax and me?" I shrugged again.

"I just decided i need a break." He threw his hands up.

"Oh really a break? Well how's this for a break? You arent taking a break, you're being a fucking coward! You don't want to talk to me fine at least let us know you're alive! Is that too much to ask for?" The tears spilled from my eyes.

"You guys just need to forget me. Go back to being inseperable. I can't take being the reason you and jax fight." That one threw him. His face softened and he came and sat next to me on the couch. He ran his hand through his hair and sighes.

"Lu, we could never forget you.I'm sorry I punched Jax. I was just afraid he was going to hurt you." I stared at the tv, staying quiet. I knew if I opened my mouth the tears were going to spill out and I couldn't have that right now. He needed to go. They needed to stop fighting and this was the only way.

"I may not have known you allof my life, but I have known you majority of it. You mean just as much to me as he does Faith. I'm a mess without you both and it kills me you not talking to me. Jax and I have already made up. I love that guy, he's my brother nothing could keep us apart for long. It shocks me that you don't know this. I'm going through some crazy shit in my head. I'm getting married. I'm having a kid. I don't know how to handle this shit on my own. I need you guys to keep me straight. Please don't leave me now. I need you." It was at that, I lost it. I lunged at him, wrapping my arms around his neck and I cried. I tried to stop but they kept coming, to his credit, he didn't say a word. He just rubbed my back until I stopped crying.

"You okay now?" I nodded as I pulled back from him. I wiped the excess tears from my eyes.

"Goodbecause you have someone else who needs to see you. He's a mess too." I nodded, realizing what he meant. I stood up and then motioned to my clothes. I was in the clothes I wore home after spending the night with Jax.

"You women and your damn clothes. You look good no matter what you were. 90% of the time we don't care." I shrugged and followed him out of the door.

"For the record Ope that's bullshit. You always comment on my clothes." I didn't have to look at him to know he was rolling his eyes.