I plopped myself down at the picnic table. I hoped that man did the considerate thing and got dressed then followed me outside but only time will tell. Until the prince of samcro decides to make his presence known, I took in my surroundings. It was a beautiful sunny day with a perfect breeze, not the kind of day that I would imagine when I think impending doom. I shook my head, here I am already psyching myself out. Just take a breath Luanne. I just hope that things went okay between us because I honestly didn't know what I would do if I lost him . He was my very best friend. I would do anything for him but I wasn't sure I was ready for things to change. When I was with him I was too much of myself, like I was too comfortable. He knew the embarrassing things about me that only a best friend knows, the things you don't always tell your significant other. That alone could make things awkward, because really did you want the person who loves you and regulary sees you naked to know that you miscalculated dates and started my period in the middle of class? Not just started in class, but bled through your clothes and the chair? Yeah of course not, but thats just one of the overly embarrassing things about me that Jax knows. I guess what I'm saying is I just want my best friend back. I wanted him to come over and hang out. I wanted to pig out and goof off. I wanted him to listen to me and snuggle me when I had a bad day. Was that too much to ask for?

Jax confidently strode out of the clubhouse. He lit up a cigarette as he made his way towards me. The breeze picked up at that moment, causing his hair to blow around him. God even the wind wanted to touch him. Regardless of the reason my stomach tied in knots and now more than ever i wished I had chosen something sexier to wear. I nervously started to pick at my, well Jax's, pajama pants. Damn Opie and his impatience. If he had just given me five more minutes I could have at least pulled off cute! Oh my god! What am I saying? Didn't I just make the decision for us to stay friends? I put my head in my hands so I could no longer be distracted by his looks. I had to stick to my guns and I knew as soon as I thought it that this was going to be a hard conversation.

"Hey darlin',' he said as he sat down at the bench with me. Be cool Lu.

"Hey Jax," he gave me a big smile and my stomach started to knot again. When did these feelings happen? How do I make them stop?

"I'm uh sorry about what you seen. I don't like for you to see that side of me. I'm sorry about Wendy too, she was unnecessarily rude to you." I nodded but focused my gaze on the row of motorcycles lined up in front of the clubhouse. I hoped I wasn't coming off as rude, I was just trying to get my thoughts back into the right place. I couldn't be off of my game right now. I needed to get things sorted out between us.

" So you and Wendy..."I asked in not so many words. I was dying with curiosity to know. I wished I could say it was because I wanted a friendly dose of gossip but I didn't geel like lying to myself right now. He shook his head with a smile.

"Nah, its happened a couple times; nothing serious. She's just someone that fills a need." I arched an eyebrow.

"And she's perfectly okay with that?" His facial expression held all of the confidence that pretty much told me all I needed to know. He was Jackson Teller, girls would cut off their limbs to spend the night with him.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I let out a big sigh, here it comes. My stomach tied up in knots.

"I don't know where we stand Jax. Right now I barely feel like we are friends. Have you even noticed that I haven't been around the last couple of days? When did things get so strange between us?" My heart started racing in my chest. I can't believe that I had just said all of that! He reached over and grabbed my hand but didn't say anything. Why wasn't he talking?

"I'm sorry you feel that way Luanne. Of course I noticed you're my best friend; how could I not notice? I don't know what's going on with us. I just got a lot of shit going on in my head and I don't want to drag you in the middle of it. I don't want you to get hurt." It took a minute for that to sink in. Was he trying to tell me something? It sounded like he was trying to make excuses for the way he's been lately. Did he regret kissing me?

"Do you love me Jax?" He looked puzzled.I wasn't going to elaborate on which kind of love I meant. If he loved me as a friend that was fine, we could go back to being how things were. If he was in love with me then we would play it by ear.

"Of course I love you Faith. You're my best friend." My heart felt a little deflated but I quickly shook it off.

"I love you too Jax. The last thing I want to do is to lose you." He leaned back and gave me one of his cocky smirks.

"Obviously, who wants to lose all of this?" I rolled my eyes and then gave him a smirk of my own.

"You know,I think you're more afraid of me than I am of you." He sat up, obviously confused .

"Huh?"

"You keep saying that you're bad for me and going to hurt me. I'm calling bullshit. I think you know that I could destroy you. I could make you fall in love with me and that scares the hell out of you."

a/n: sorry for the delays kiddos! On top of a lot of personal delays this chapter wasn't cooperating with me. It wasn't trying to go where I wanted it to! But I won! Enjoy and review please