This is technically one chapter I split in half.

Chapter title is from the same song title by Barns Courtney

Unbeta-ed. Enjoy!

Diego

He almost forgot where they were.

He had left the mansion years ago, but after returning to his thirteen-year-old body, it was easy to fall back on the same childhood routine their father had set for them. He woke at exactly seven in the morning, washed his face, brushed his teeth, got dressed, and went out while Luther was beginning to rise.

It was basically being mechanical all over again. He just hoped his embarrassing stutter wasn't as bad as he had as a kid.

Diego came down for breakfast, was greeted by Jarvis a pleasant morning along the way, and arrived at the kitchen that already had two people.

He didn't know any of them.

The woman saw him and smiled. "Good morning," she said. "Eggs and bacon?"

For a moment, Mom came to mind. Mom hadn't aged a day since he was a boy and when she saw her again thirteen years later. Mom was an impeccable woman, her appearance perfect whenever Diego saw her, and she always had the same kind smile for him and his siblings no matter what.

Diego sat on the rightmost highchair from the unknown man. He hadn't seen this man yesterday. Was he part of The Avengers? Diego couldn't remember seeing him from those video clips Jarvis showed them the previous day. There was the man with a shield and his face covered, but this one didn't resemble that person, physique-wise. He could be one of those two whose faces were barely caught on the camera, all shots from behind, but Diego could say one was a redheaded woman and the other a male archer or something.

The man awkwardly smiled at Diego when he caught him staring.

A plate of eggs, bacon, and toast was placed in front of him. It wasn't arranged like a smiley, but it smelled good. Diego ate in silence, nodding his thanks at the glass of orange juice that followed.

"I'm afraid we haven't met yet," said the woman after serving the other man a cup of tea. "I'm Pepper."

Oh. It was the person who made their dinner last night. "Diego," he said, resuming his eating.

"Bruce." Diego looked up to the man with curly hair who spoke. "If you want to know," he added, hesitant.

Honestly, Diego didn't know what to do with the awkwardness that Bruce seemed to naturally project. He was saved, thankfully, by Luther's arrival followed closely by Five and Allison's. Ben came along dragging a half-asleep Klaus who couldn't be bothered to change into proper clothes. Vanya was last to arrive, but Diego assumed that was mainly to avoid them.

Diego was amused at Bruce's reaction at seeing the bunch of them. In turn, Diego's siblings regarded Bruce curiously as they occupied the empty stools. Pepper, meanwhile, looked delighted at seeing their faces, beaming at them in greeting, particularly at Vanya who gave a shy smile back. Did they know each other?

"Coffee. Black," Diego heard Five beside him. "If you don't mind, miss…"

"Call me Pepper," she said, considering the request for a bit but nonetheless reached for the coffee pot. "That bad dealing with Tony, huh? I don't blame you." She set the cup down in front of a mildly disbelieved Five. "I had to leave early yesterday evening so I only know Vanya here, and then Diego. What are your names?"

There was another round of quick introductions around the table before Bruce stood up to refill his teacup on his own. Pepper admonished him lightly for not letting her.

"This is Bruce Banner, by the way. He's a housemate and a friend," said Pepper. "Now sit down, Bruce, and let me."

Bruce sat back like a chastised kid, giving them a short wave before keeping to himself while occasionally glancing at them as if he was trying to figure something out. What was wrong with him?

Tony swept in like he owned the place—which he did. His appearance was much worse than Klaus, looking simultaneously like a disgruntled child rudely awoken and someone who scarcely got half an hour of sleep. He walked up to an unimpressed Pepper and gave her a kiss.

Bruce cleared his throat. "Tony, you're in front of the kids," he said disapprovingly.

"I've seen worse," Klaus said with a mouthful of bacon.

"You heard him," Tony said. He made a show of giving Pepper a big hug before reaching past her to fish the coffee pot. He took the vacant spot beside Five, pointing at his coffee, "Hey, you like that?"

Five shrugged. "It's an upgrade from what I've had before," he replied before taking another sip. Diego rolled his eyes. Translation: it was good.

"Good. Have some more, kid." Tony promptly filled Five's mug. "He's after my own heart," he announced before chugging straight from the pot.

Pepper looked ashamed to be associated by Tony, and Diego supposed that was a normal reaction. It made him think of Mom again and wondered if Mom would feel the same to be associated with their father if others found out that he treated his adopted kids like test subjects. But while Mom was a sophisticated robot, she was still made by Reginald. She never had any bad thing to say to him in the end.

It was only Diego who believed that she had her own free will, to begin with.

"I'm finished," he said politely. "Excuse me."

If they stared after him, Diego didn't look back.

Bruce

He got an odd text message from Tony that simply said to be at the tower if convenient.

Good timing seeing as he was headed there anyway after coming from the airport. He had been away for two days attending a lecture by a former colleague. Bruce had qualms going away at first, not wanting to leave Tony and the others to deal with the aftermath of the invasion by themselves—the press, S.H.I.E.L.D. protocols, casualties and damage accounting, and stuffs just as tedious to deal with. It felt unfair to have those fall into his hands as Bruce Banner while the Hulk did most of the action, smashing without care. The Hulk really didn't hold back with all that pent up anger and frustration from Bruce's life as a fugitive.

Tony insisted, though, that he took it as a time off, saying Bruce had enough stress in this lifetime alone to deal with and he would rather not have him Hulk out again during the renovations. Bruce gratefully took the chance to escape from Director Fury's watchful eyes, but he believed that the reason he managed to leave the state without hindrance was the assurance that he wouldn't be running away from their radar anytime soon.

Bruce didn't expect that to change overnight.

Nor was he expecting Tony to suddenly adopt seven kids to rile Fury.

"Oh."

"Well, you took it better than me," Pepper said. "I only met one of them, but I'm optimistic about the others." Pepper—bless her—looked so fond already, and Bruce couldn't help but think that Tony was a lucky man. Pepper was a resilient woman to have stood with Tony through thick and thin and put up with plenty of his antics.

"I'm just another resident of this tower. I don't really have a say on who Tony takes under his wing." Though not in a million years did he think Tony would decide to take in kids.

"Please." Pepper rolled her eyes. "He values your opinion more than he does for the others. 'I only listen to kindred minds', to quote him. Here's to me hoping that he gets your good sense."

Bruce chuckled. Nice to know Pepper thought he had that. If anything, it was Tony who was starting to rub off on him. Bruce didn't recall developing an inclination for sarcasm recently.

A boy then came in, his eyes darting between Pepper and Bruce before he sat as far as he could. Not timid, Bruce observed; he recognized the cautiousness of the boy's body language, not as extreme as Bruce's during his runaway days, but it was worrying to find it in a thirteen-year-old kid. He could only imagine what the boy escaped from.

His name was Diego, and he minded his own breakfast, saying thanks at Pepper's attentiveness but otherwise ate his food noiselessly. Sometimes Bruce would catch him staring, sometimes it was Diego who would catch him. It was silly.

Bruce usually avoided children if he could, with the Hulk often agitated with their racket. But if the rest of the kids were like Diego, Bruce supposed it wouldn't be so bad living together with them.

His confidence strengthened when the rest came in, four more boys and two girls. Luther, Five, and Ben were just as reserved as their brother, and then there was Klaus acting… appropriately for his age, Bruce thought amusedly. Allison moved easily around, smiling at Bruce when she sat to his right, while Vanya, the child who Pepper said she had already taken a liking to, was the last to come in. Judging by Vanya's expression when she noticed Pepper, the sentiment was mutual.

Good mannered children, Bruce thought wistfully. That was something he didn't see often (or didn't focus much on given his situation).

Then there came Tony.

Bruce liked Tony. He might be verbose and arrogant, but those were Tony's default buttons for anyone that wasn't Pepper. Tony's best quality was his honesty, and Bruce was partial on his bluntness. They probably didn't think it would come from an unexcitable person like him, assuming that he was like Cap who would find Tony's attitude distasteful. Tony was a good friend and a science buddy, and Bruce wouldn't deny the company of an intellectual who knew what he could turn into and offered to search for a remedy instead of running away from him.

Although, Bruce wouldn't deny that Tony could be a bad influence on these children.

As Tony encouraged Five's caffeine craving, Bruce decided that it was only a matter of when.

He could only sigh in surrender as Tony drank straight from the coffeepot with the finesse of a drunk in front of the kids.

Might as well rub off on Tony the good sense Pepper kept insisting Bruce has.

Tony

So he might have overindulged last night.

Jarvis warned him once or twice, but when did Tony listen to him? Jarvis had tried to close the window Tony was reading on but was unsuccessful in keeping Tony from being awake.

S.H.I.E.L.D. put Luther's data next to Cap and Thor, which didn't surprise Tony. Their measurement of the kid's super strength wasn't close to the super soldier and the Asgardian, but there was a promising benchmark for improvement given that Luther was young compared to Cap and Thor in their prime.

Diego's was placed next to Barton's. It seemed that S.H.I.E.L.D. didn't bother anymore to keep from Tony the info on one of their top agents. Must have known it was futile. Barton's file listed the result of his latest accuracy and precision test, while the same spot on Diego's listed a sizable range. Tony would have to test that too.

Tony once again pored over his stolen S.H.I.E.L.D. files, particularly on the subject of Professor Xavier's School of Gifted Youngsters. As expected, there were lists of known mutants living in the school and alumni. Five was compared to a mutant called Nightcrawler who specialized in the ability of spatial travel a.k.a. teleportation. But unlike the mutant, it was indicated that Five has limitations after a certain number of spatial jumps.

There was an attached video clip of Nightcrawler, real name Kurt Wagner, in action. Tony wouldn't believe it was a teenager, to be honest, with that tail and midnight-blue skin. He lazily skimmed through on the files about mutants. Halfway, his mind wandered on the possible abilities the other four could have. Could one of them have telekinesis like this redheaded mutant girl? How about laser eyes like this visored boy, except there would be no need for special glasses? How about weather control? That would be fascinating, but it could mean indoor climate change which wasn't cool. Could one of them possess an unnaturally fast regeneration? Tony dismissed it; he wasn't looking forward to hurting a kid just to test that one out.

Looking at all these mutants, their peculiar genetic makeup and their isolated living, made Tony think back bitterly on the invasion. It must be nice living unperturbed on your island while aliens came down on Earth. The Avengers could have had their aid, and the battle would have been won easily without Fury settling for a nuke and fuck everything within the perimeter. Tony was inside a suit of metal, but he would never forget holding a timed bomb on his hands.

A tiny slip or a one-second delay and the outcome would have been much, much worse.

For once in his life, Tony was being eaten by the various what-ifs.

He tasked Jarvis to place an order for bedroom furniture. Tony would let them decorate their respective sanctuaries because kids like that, yeah? King-sized beds, nightstands, and closets. Sounded about right. Would cartoon-patterned sheets be appreciated?

"Jarvis, what do kids like?" Tony asked at 2:48 in the morning.

"What you like as a kid, sir," Jarvis quipped. Did Tony program him that way?

"You of all people should know what I was like." He definitely wasn't a regular kid.

"I'm afraid you are mistaking me for the late Edwin Jarvis, sir."

Tony did, didn't he? It wasn't even intentional.

"But I'm sure he would have urged you to get sleep," Jarvis insisted.

Yes. Edwin Jarvis would. He was more of a father to him than Howard ever was. Was he looking down at him now, shaking his head in disappointment at Tony? Was he seeing how sleep deprived he was, more often than not hungover? Tony wasn't doing drugs or having suicidal tendencies, so there was that.

He wasn't cut out to take care of children, of all things, and everyone knew that. It was nice that Pepper was backing him up on this, but she wasn't here now.

He ordered Jarvis to send a message for Bruce, Cap, and, hey, maybe Rhodey would like to hear the news as well. The last recipients were Clint and Nat because fuck S.H.I.E.L.D. and Fury.

Tony's eyes began to hurt as he stared mindlessly at the slide of scans Jarvis had taken beforehand. The uniform the children were wearing has a curious logo with a Latin inscription of Ut Malum Pluvia. When evil rains, a wordplay with 'when evil reigns'. Terrible.

"It would have explained the umbrella tattoos the six of them have," Jarvis said.

"The what?"

"They all have it marked on their wrists, except Miss Vanya," Jarvis elaborated. "I believe there is a clear image—"

"Who the hell brands young children?" Tony gritted out, his volume rising. "This is sick."

Who lets shitty people adopt kids? Oh, yeah, Klaus said they were bought. Maybe that gave their 'Father' a right to ink them like fucking products. Jesus, that was more messed up than Howard.

Fuck Howard. Fuck this Reginald.

Actually, Tony shouldn't give a damn what others think of him. They think him taking care of seven kids was bad news? Well, tough shit, they were under his roof now. They have something to say to that? They damn well better bring it up to Howard and Reginald's asses.

Tony would show them.

Okay, so maybe not immediately because he really needed that fix of coffee first thing in the morning.

Five seemed to share the same hankering, and he was Tony's favorite so far, closely followed by Klaus; the latter of the two only a step lower in the ranking because Tony was reminded of his own self for some reason.

He was yet to gauge the others. Soon. Later, maybe.

Yes. Noon would be fitting.

They lined up in front of him like good Scouters, wearing the plain black sweatshirts he provided. Durable materials they were, just in case there would be an urge to rip their clothes.

"So…" Tony snapped his fingers. "A rundown?"

"Super strength," Luther said first after glancing at his siblings.

"Trajectory manipulation," said Diego. "Only on knives so far."

"Persuasion," Allison said. "I think that's what they call it." Tony would have her explain that more later.

"I can see ghosts," Klaus told him. "And talk to them."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Like that boy in the movie The Sixth Sense?"

"What's that?"

"Bruce Willis. 'I see dead people.' "

Tony got seven blank stares. That was something that had to be remedied.

"You already know mine," Five said, frowning when Tony moved on to him.

"Share it to the class anyway. Bruce here is new to all of these."

Speaking of Bruce. He was faring well, considering, though incredibly surprised at the turn of events, mouthing they have powers?

Tony might have forgotten to tell him that, as well as the training with The Avengers Five suggested and Tony readily agreed to. Not only to Bruce—forgot to inform the team. Eh.

"Spatial jumps," Five said impatiently.

"I can summon creatures from my…" Ben gestured on his stomach. "Usually creatures with tentacles."

"That's very Asian of you." Ben confusedly looked back at him as Tony turned to Vanya.

She appeared hesitant to say. "I don't… I don't really know what it is called."

"She only discovered it recently," Five supplied for her. "We think it's related to sound."

"And my emotions," Vanya added. "I can't control it properly."

"All hell breaks loose whenever you get angry?"

When Vanya nodded uncomfortably, Tony's gaze darted back to Bruce. "About that sound thing, you need a conduit for that?"

"I was using a violin before," Vanya replied weakly. "It's… more chaotic without it."

"Noted." Tony would have to get her that, then. "So you can't use other instruments?"

"I only know how to play the violin," she admitted.

"You want to wait before I get you a new one?" Tony said. "Be in the sidelines if that's what you—"

"No," Vanya interrupted, surprising Tony and her siblings with her volume. "I-I'm sorry. I mean, it's me who's in need of this training. I was never given the chance to join them before, and I don't want my powers to hurt my brothers and sister if I use it again, so I want to control it, sir."

Vanya's eyes met his. She has fierceness there that she didn't make much of a show of. Tony winked. "Now that's the spirit."

She broke eye contact, though Tony didn't miss the small smile. "I remembered Dad using a tuning fork as part of measuring my powers. He used a row of wine glasses to see how many I can break with the resonance."

According to her, it was proven to work as a test trial for her ability. But that was Reginald's idea, and Tony was all for originality. "Noted."

Ben grinned at her sister, squeezing her by her shoulders. Tony heard him whisper, "You broke all glasses, didn't you? I bet that was cool."

Klaus's arm shot up. "Hey, Mister Tony, I have a request." Tony waited for him to continue. "If I may, I'll sit out on this one. My ability isn't a convenient one. I can see and talk to ghosts, but there's no way for you to see what I'm seeing and talking with. If you catch my drift."

Tony couldn't argue with that. Thermal imaging was a ridiculous concept used in live TV ghostbusting, next to the idea of ghosts, in Tony's initial opinion.

"But, I'd like to volunteer myself as their partner. Meaning that I can be for Luther to throw around as a basis of how much weight he could throw and how high, or maybe Diego's running target. They say I can rock the bullseye attire."

"You're asking to be their punching bag," Tony stated flatly. Bruce looked horrified at that suggestion.

"Is that what they call it here?"

"I'm pretty sure it's called being a living punching bag anywhere," Diego said. "No, Klaus, w-what the hell?"

"Klaus, please don't be like this," Luther muttered.

"That is the stupidest thing I've heard from you," Five reprimanded.

"Yep. That's a very bad idea," Allison said.

"Seconded. And you've had several bad ideas before," Ben said while Vanya worriedly frowned at Klaus.

Tony has a feeling that this boy's tendencies weren't uncommon.

"Guys, Ben is already standing here. What do you need me for?"

Klaus's nonchalance only served to anger Diego. "Don't speak that way about y-yourself. W-What if we hurt you? I g-get that you're a m-masochistic prick, but you're not i-i-insignificant to us that you think we're just going to a-a-agree with that!"

Was this what having siblings like? Tony was never one for wishing a brother or a sister. He liked being alone, and as a single child there was no one to divide his toys with; not that it was a problem since Howard would rather shower him with material presents than attention. Hard to compete with Captain America.

Klaus looked genuinely shaken by his brother's stuttering words than the hands that bodily shook him. His face split into a grin before laughing. "Aww, Diego, that was really sweet." Diego's ears were pink when Klaus hugged him but didn't push him away. "I already made up my mind, sorry. The reason I suggested this is because I've been feeling antsy since yesterday. I know it might be all in my head or something since it's not possible for my body to feel that way, but this is better than the alternative, no?"

Lots to unpack there. Tony knew better than to pry, but he would be lying if he said he wasn't curious.

"You heard your siblings, kid," he said to him.

And Tony—Jesus, he was so right when he said that Klaus would be one of those difficult kids. "Don't mind them, Mister Stark. I insist because I doubt they'll hurt me. Allison can thank me later after her demonstration."

"Klaus won't stop until we agree," Ben huffed. "Fine by me, but you stay out of it if it's my turn and Vanya's; Luther doesn't get to thrash you; you'll wear protective gear against Diego's knives; Five doesn't get to drop you at a great height; Allison… well, she has the most common sense."

The brothers looked affronted, Allison was positively smug, Vanya was fighting back a smile, and Ben was seriously taking up the mantle of being Klaus's self-preservation.

"Deal," Klaus readily agreed.

Resigned, they turned to Tony who merely smirked at them back. Not a dull moment with these kids, he bet.

"That's settled."

TBC