As I kept replaying the anger on Josh's face when he realized I was in the room, I was lightly led away by Lee, my heart was left behind in the small hall that we had rented. I was trying to help him. I wasn't trying to hinder him in anyway possible. Hell my only concern was for his safety. I pictured his eyes, I could see the deep burning loathing in him. Did he hate me? No he was just mad that I was in the middle of the room where fist were flying all over the place, right? But why was he so mad? It's not like I was the one who was throwing punches I was just there. I felt my eyes water and did my best to maintain myself. I don't know Lee at all, he damn sure hasn't earned the trust to see me cry. He has your mom's trust, the little annoying voice in my head reminded me. Yeah and he's also had my mother's vagina. Oh god why did I go there? I visibly cringe and Lee places his hand on my back. Which in all actuality didn't really help with the cringing thoughts. Those hands had more than definitely been on my mom's vagina. Oh my fucking good Faith stop! I swear to God I may punch myself in the face if I get another thought about my mother's lady parts. He led me towards a small outdoor table and lifted a hand as in telling me to take a seat.

"Don't cry kiddo, he's not mad at you. He was in fight mode and wasn't prepared to see you right in the middle of it." Apparently he managed to grab a couple beers on the way out because he twisted the cap off of a bottle of Miller light and took a long pull. He motioned the other one in my direction but I declined.

"He looked at me like I don't know, I can't explain it. I felt as if he hated me; that the sight of me disgusted him or something." He laughed that sorry bastard. Gee so glad we were sharing that he felt the need to laugh at my feelings.

"Sweetheart, I don't think there's a damn thing you could do that would make the boy hate you." He shook his head as if I was the most ridiculous thing and took a long pull of his beer. I debated over telling this stranger what happened with Jax but I shook off that idea. This man looks at himself as Josh's honorary father, he wouldn't be on my side about this even though I didn't kiss Jax or even kiss him back.

"It looks like something Jax said to him that started the fight." He shrugged his shoulders.

"It could have been you'll just have to ask him. So I'm sorry for how uncomfortable I'm about to make this whole thing but it's weird as fuck seeing you as a grown woman when I remember that freckle faced little girl who would punch me if I said she wasn't pretty." Ah I remember that stage of my life. Thanks to Jax and Clay actually my confidence was slowly coming back and anyone who said I wasnt pretty got the shit knocked out of them. Clay was so proud of me every time I did it he would get prospects to come ask me the question just to laugh and yell thats my girl. The smile was on my face before it registered in my head. His words went back through my head and instead of laughing I was confused. My mom said that I never really came in contact with him but he's acting like we had a whole relationship.

"I'm sorry Lee, I don't remember you ever being around. I can tell something big went down between you and my mom. Something big by the look of it but I don't get why I don't remember you." He looks towards the hall and slowly sips his beer. I can tell he's weighing his thoughts.

"To be honest with you, kinda hurts that you don't remember me. I was there, every weekend for four months. The first two I wasn't allowed around until your mama was sure that I wasn't a serial killer. We went places, did things, we had a lot of fun." That hurt my heart. I'm not sure if it was because of the missing memories or the fact that I had a man in my life who was so much better to me than my sperm donor and I never even knew it. Well to be fair I always had Clay and I always will. Clay stepped in to be my dad and never stepped out. I remember when I cried because I didn't have a date to the father daughter dance. I cried for days. My mom called Gemma and Clay came over. He asked me what was wrong and when I told him it was stupid, he told me nothing I ever thought was stupid unless it was about a boy. Which caused me to laugh. When I told him what was wrong, he gave me that goofy smile he always had for me and said well you got yourself a date now. And I had one every year after that without having to do more than tell him the date and time. I was the only one who came to the dance on the back of a motorcycle.

"Well I will thank you for that, even if I don't remember. I imagine it meant the world to me." I stopped and cleared my throat. "Do you think, you know if we had moved with you, that me and him would have still happened?" He laughed, a heartfelt belly one that shook his body. I felt my cheeks heat in embarrassment.

"Honey, that boys been stuck on you since the day he seen you. Do you think that would have been different if he knew you longer?" I thought about Opie and Jax and how confusing things got because we all grew up together. All of the hidden feelings are just now out in the open that Opie's gotten married and I'm in a healthy relationship.

"Yes," he seemed to think it over.

"Well then I guess I really can't say, you know since it never happened." The silence fell between us for a few moments and I was surprised by how much I did in fact like Lee and could see how my mom could have been happy with him. In a way, I wish she would have gotten her happy ever after but I couldn't imagine being raised anywhere else, around anyone else. Maybe she still had a shot at forever who knows I felt a question burning my tongue But instead of asking why he let her go if he cared about us so much, I asked something else instead.

"What's his mom like? Is she sweet and carefree like him or did his dad ruin her life?" Our stories may be similar but they were different. Whereas my dad left but my mom wasn't as hurt or at least I never seen, I remember Josh saying his mom suffered. Lee appeared somber for a few minutes. The silence is comfortable but I find myself oddly picking at my dress, secretly hoping I can get the blood out.

"She's guarded, but a real good woman. One of the best in my opinion. She raised three kids with little help from anyone. Tommy constantly had to sneak money in because she wouldn't accept it from him. She is actually part of what I wanted to talk to you about. Josh doesn't know but she calls me once a week to see how he's doing." That puzzled me. Josh told me he goes home every Sunday, with the exception on if he's able to sneak down here for the weekend. The have a big dinner together with his mom and sisters. He told me it was the highlight of his mom's week.

"I thought Sundays were reserved for his family? I usually don't talk to him after he gets to his moms because I want to give him space to enjoy them." He tilted his beer in my direction and winked at me.

"He does. She calls me to make sure he's not bullshitting her. That he's safe. But the last few weeks you know what her main topic has been?" I shake my head. "You, she wants to know as much as she could about the girl he wouldn't bring home to meet his mom. I told her you were from here and she broke down and cried."

"Why? I mean if it means that much I can find a way to come you there for a weekend." I didn't tell him but it was already in the works for next month. I wanted to surprise Josh and as nice as this man is to me, again he's not my people. He is 100% on team Josh.

"Well I imagined she would appreciate that but it's because she knows what we all do ...you're gonna take him from us." My heart which I thought had finally made it's way back into my body, fell to the floor. Was that what I was doing? Am I taking him from everyone he loves dearly? I tried to look ahead to the future. If things worked out and I became his old lady, would I leave my life behind or would he? I couldn't imagine not being around Charming. It's been most of my life at the same time I knew how selfish it was of me to want him to pack up and leave everyone behind. I felt the tears run down my face at the ache I haven't felt in quite sometime.

"I'm sorry Lee, I guess we never thought of that." I know it sounded selfish but I didn't know what else to say, so I gave him what I knew.

"It's neither of your faults. I know when it hits you, it hits hard. Either way one of you will give up their entire life." We were interupted by the sound of the hall door opening and men started piling out laughing with their arms around each other's shoulders. Both of our eyes searched for Josh and he was one of the last ones to file out of the door, looking still pissed to the max. He glanced around until he landed on us and then headed our way. I quickly placed my hand on Lee's arm to stop him as he stood up. He raised his eyebrow in answer to my touch.

"If you had to do it all over, would you have walked away again?" The words spilled out of my mouth that wouldn't earlier. After what we just talked about I had to know. I had to know that if it comes down to it and we have to break up because of distance...I just had to know. That wasn't what he was expecting, I could tell from the change in his eyes. He still didn't hesitate with his answer.

"She isn't getting away a second time. But that's not the answer you were looking for is it? No? I would have fought for her, just like he will fight for you when you try to walk away to save him from the hurt. Just because I'm crazy about your mom, doesn't mean I won't kick your ass for hurting my boy, ya hear?" I swallowed the lead that was in my throat as Josh approached and his gaze didn't flicker to me yet, which isn't like him . He gave Lee a once over and then his gaze barely landed on me before it was back on Lee. I didn't like this Josh, he was harder, meaner, and again I felt like I didn't know this person in front of me. The person who has made me laugh so hard I cried, the man who mended my broken heart, hell the man who gave me myself back. I started to pick at the white paint on the swirly designs on the table. I can't look at him anymore, if my heart hurts anymore it will break. Josh clears his throat and I quickly glance up but it wasn't my attention he was trying to get.

"I gotta worry about you trying to take what's mine too?" Remember when I said my heart was hurting? Yeah I just felt the first crack. He thinks I betrayed him. I can tell by the harshness of his voice and the way he can't look at me. I feel the tears start to spill but I quickly pull them back in because mama didn't raise a quitter, a fucking stubborn hardheaded dumbass sometimes but no quitter.

From my view of the chipped paint, I could see Lee lean his head to the side in confusion . Josh held strong on his stance and I wondered if he was serious but Lee broke into a grin thankfully I can't see the other participant then they did the bro hug thing and whispered a few things to each other. Lee grabbed his other beer off of the table then placed his hand on my shoulder. I barely heard the, "good luck kid," as he walked away. Josh didn't sit down, hell he didn't even look at me.

"I need to get you home so you can change then we need to talk." I couldn't speak so I nodded even though I knew he couldn't see it. He started briskly walking and I followed with my head down, not ready to say goodbye to the best thing to ever happen to me. Fucking Jax, no telling what he said to him for him to feel this way. I followed him to his bike with the tears freshly running down my face. He got on and I bundled up my dress and hopped on after him.

He didn't speak to me as we pulled up to my house and he shut his bike off. I got off and ran into the house before he could see the mascara running down my face. I heard my mom in the kitchen but I ran for the stairs, not wanting to put her in the middle of what's happening. I found a simple salmon pink shirt and blue jeans and washed my face free of the make up I had been wearing all day. I took my hair down and brushed through it just to put it back up in a messy bun. I slid on my air nikes and hopped back out of the door to find him leaning up against his bike. His fitted hat pulled low over his eyes. This was a far cry from the man I knew and my heart suffered another crack.

"Are you ready to talk now?" He didnt respond. He hopped onto his bike and then looked at me expectantly. I got on and he took off. We ended up at the park. I'm guessing he didn't want to fight in front of my mom so maybe that's a good thing. Maybe I have a chance at saving face and as much as it hurts to say, if he doesn't believe me then he's not the one. I did nothing wrong. Jax kissed me. So for him to be so mad I mean he obviously got a different story but shit he could let me explain before treating me like this. He walks towards the lake and takes off his shades and really stares at me for the first time since he practically serenaded me. I see the pain and hurt in his eyes.

"You got something to tell me?" I nodded and fought the urge to look at my hands. I needed to look him in the eyes so he knew it was the truth. I took a deep breath and nodded my head. I tried to imagine that I was a wicked combo of Gemma and my mother. I needed the steel spine right now. Calm down Faith, it's not like you're admitting to having sex with someone, just that Jax kissed you and you didn't kiss back.

"Let's hear it," he waved his hand in an 'out with it motion'. I took a deep breath then let it out.

"Earlier when you were talking to your guys after the awkward thing with my mom, I walked outside to catch my breath. Jax followed me outside. We started talking and at first I thought he was trying to mend the friendship he messed up. But I was wrong, he kissed me. I didn't kiss him back, then we got into a big fight and started screaming at each other. My mother and Ope came and broke it up. Then I came inside and you sang." I mentally patted myself on the back for getting through that without breaking down or starting to cry. It was the truth but I was so fucking nervous I wanted to die on the spot. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"You and Teller have a thing before I showed up? Other than what I heard about at Gemma's?" Oh boy Jax went all out huh? I'm gonna kill this bastard when I'm done fixing my relationship. He walked over towards the bench and we sat down.

"Okay so please don't think less of me. I was in love with Opie from the time I was twelve years old. I was young I was dumb and being a girl with two male best friends it's easy to find yourself with a crush. Well Opie never returned advances and I never dated because goddamn it I had our life planned out in my head so why break some poor guys heart? Well Ope never knew of my affections, I just recently found out about his but after he got with Donna and things got serious I was gonna tell him a million times but I didn't because I didn't want to risk losing him as a friend. Well then Donna and Ope announced they were pregnant and planning to wed and then shit got complicated..." I trailed off.

"As nice as it is to know about your past, Opie wasn't who I asked you about " I rolled my eyes at that.

"I'm getting there asshole," he had the nerve to look mock offended. The first sign I've seen of my Josh in a few hours.

"Well that night I was obviously a wreck. I was so lost because everything I had ever dreamed of was washing down the drain. Opie and I were supposed to live happily ever after. Well I went to Jax's dorm room because I did that all the time especially when I needed to think. He stumbled in drunk. He kissed me and then with all the hurt I was going through I got confused. We fooled around that time Gemma caught us but that's it. He's been a real dick to me since him and Ope got into a fight because of it. It's caused some really bad tension and a loss of friendship from someone I never thought I would lose." He didn't say anything just stretched his hand on the back of the bench barely touching my shoulder.

"And nothing since me?" I was appalled. Did he really thinks so little of me?

"No Josh, nothing since before I met you. Definitely not since the day your eyes locked on me in the parking lot, practically claiming me there. You've showed me so much in our short relationship. You showed me how I should be treated. You showed me how it feels to be loved and to be honest it makes me realize that I never really could have been in love with Opie because it's nothing of what I feel for you." His fingers lightly touched my shoulder and I wanted to relax into his touch but I didn't realize this was just the calm before the storm hits me.

"So then today in the back of Gemma's caddy was a fluke?" I jump back startled. What the hell is he talking about? I wasn't even near Gemma's truck today.

"What?"

"Today when you boned Teller, moments before I sang a song to you. Is it gonna happen again or is the little fixation out of your system?" I jumped off of the bench and smacked the shit out of him. To his credit he didnt move. My hand stung but it did nothing to stop the pounding in my chest.

"I didn't have sex with anyone today." He raised an eyebrow at me. My breaths were coming out harsh and fast.

"Right after I got done singing to you I ran into dear old mother Gemma. She told me all about catching you two and when I confronted Jax he smirked and didn't deny it. So I punched him. Gemma tells me you've been in love with him for longer than you realized so it was natural to get it out of your system. But cheating is a big no for me Faith. A big fucking no. So if that's all this was, I'll except it because for the life of me I can't seem to shake you. I was going to end it. That was my first reaction. Hell the right reaction. Up until you came out of your house and I seen your make up free face and I ..." I was pacing in front of him I was so mad. How fucking dare them try to ruin my relationship. I mean it was mainly Gemma but Jax didn't help the situation. So I decided instead of screaming I'm just going to tell him the truth.

"I didn't have sex with Jax. I'm a virgin Josh. Untouched, unfucked, definitely not having sex in the back of anyone's car." I could tell the moment what I said registered because his eyes about jumped out of his head, but they went down soon enough. I could tell he was thinking of what to say because it took him a few minutes to answer. It didn't even cross my mind that he wouldn't believe me until he opened his mouth.

"She said she saw you..." he still didn't believe me?!

"Do you wanna see my goddamn hymen?" I practically scream. Some elderly couple walk by and she sneers at me for screaming hymen.

"You want to see it too lady? Might give your husband some ammunition to actually give you some of what your obviously lacking." I soon found myself being stared at by most of the park. By that point my nerves were shot and I felt like I was ready to fight anyone and everyone.

"What you all need to see my fucking hymen?! Being a virgin isn't that big of a fucking deal mind your goddamn business!" Before I could say anything folks Josh grabbed me and pulled me away.

"Sorry folks she's really worked up today, go back to enjoying your day."

He lead me back to his bike and bent over when we got there. I crossed my arms over my chest and wouldn't look at him in the face. I was surprised to hear his laugh. What in the hell did he have to laugh about? He just not only accused me of cheating but was going through the motions of trying to forgive me for something I didn't even do. As I stated my mother raised a stubborn hardheaded dumbass but his mother just raised an stupid asshole apparently. I rolled my eyes at myself. Okay that was dramatic. He has good qualities too just right now I can't see any of them. He stood up and walked over to me. He placed his hands on both sides of my face. His happy go lucky look was back on his face as if the past two hours didn't happen. Not going to lie though, that soft smile of his was slowly melting away my resistance and anger and I think he knew that.

"Sunshine," he called me out of my thoughts. I'm guessing to make sure he had my full attention. I raised my eyes to his and away from his lips where I didn't realize that I had been lost looking.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not coming to you first. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about things before I started a fist fight in Donna's wedding hall. I'm sorry I believed fucking Gemma over you." With each I'm sorry he kissed a different part of my face. He started with my nose, then my forehead, cheeks and so on. I found myself smiling even though I didn't want to be.

"Why? Why would you believe her other than talking to me?" He gentle brushed the stray hair out off of my forehead.

"I guess it's because it's a deep rooted fear of mine. I watch how he is over you and I worry something will happen when I'm not here. She played on my worst fears and I foolishly let it happen." I nod understanding how easy it is to get caught up with Gemma.

"No more Josh. No more taking shit out on me that I didn't even do." He nods in agreement.

"Okay I can do that. You did great with the wedding babe. I mean that. Donna was estatic." Now he was trying to butter be up the bastard. It did cause me to smile though because I know between her and I we did great. That reminded me. I lightly punch him in the shoulder.

"That's for not telling me you were coming." He leans down and plants a light kiss on my forehead. I could tell that he was glad that we were done with this fight.

"You know I should have known you were a virgin." My cheeks hit up but I take the bait anyway.

"Why?" He pulls away from me and gives me a cheeky smile. I have a feel like I'm not going to like what he's about to say.

"Cause by now you would have at least begged me to put my tongue in that pussy." The heat in my face intensified and I smacked him. He started to jog away from me laughing.

"Shut up don't talk like that." I covered my face with my hands which definitely didn't help with the heat in my face.

"Coming from the girl who just screamed about her hymen in a crowded park." I cross my arms over my chest again.

"Well I was extremely pissed off. I didn't think about it before I started yelling." He walks towards me again and doesn't stop until I can feel his breath along my face.

"Make no mistake darlin', when I finally get to use these perfect thighs for earmuffs. You won't want to do nothing else for days."

A/n: two in two days go me! I've been actively trying to clean my house all day but obviously that didn't go well. Thanks to everyone who let me know about the format issue with the last chapter I still don't know what happened. It's never happened before. What do u guys think of the fight? I keep seeing this scene in my head of a very pregnant Faith finding out about Kyle leaving Opie behind. Thanks for reading you guys are the best!