I took a lukewarm shower. It was cold but I didn't freeze to death. Maybe I should have gone colder. In all of my romance novels I read, they say it calms your hormones down. I'm here to vouch that it's a crock of shit. I took as long as possible in the shower, shaving, singing, and mostly thinking. Silently praying that the constant heat throughout my body would calm down. I couldn't face him like this. I looked at myself in the mirror and let out a deep sigh. You are so screwed Luanne Faith. You're not even in the room with him and you can't get yourself under control. I don't know why I was so nervous. Is it just nerves that's making me feel this way? It doesn't help that my body keeps wondering how it would feel to have those rough, calloused hands rubbing up and down it. Of all damn times for my body to throw it's hat in the ring, now is the last time. Fucking hormones. Im over them already. I'm blaming my mom for this shit, I was cool, calmed, and only a little turned on before she gave me her sex talk. Now it was all I could think of. Or maybe it's because he walked out of my room, all dripping and sexy in a towel. That image was going to say in my mind for the rest of my life. When I'm an old lady embarrassing my grandkids and their friends, I'm going to bring up this moment. He's so damn confident in his nakedness too where as if that had been me, I would be stammering and shaking then take off at a run towards the bathroom. I shook my head and braced myself on the sink. After all of the shit you have handled in the past six months, you can handle sharing a bed with your boyfriend who you don't get to spend time with with nearly enough as it is. I know this is the first time you've slept in the same bed with someone who wasn't Jax, but you've got this. You are smart, you are beautiful, and you've got a smoking hot boyfriend waiting for you. I let out a shaky breath then smiled at myself in the mirror. We've got this. I quickly lotioned up and got dressed. No point in hiding out in the bathroom, this was my only chance I had to spend the night with him and I was going to cherish it.

I opened up my door and found Josh lounging on my bed. He was on his back, propped up on my pillows with a smile on his face. He had turned on a movie and was engrossed with that until I shut my door which alerted him to my presence. I swear to God I watched the man swallow his tongue. He swallowed whatever he was going to say this time then cleared his throat.

"I'm not naked, stop staring." He shook his head then smiled at me. I could tell he was trying to control his facial expression. He was doing a good job but his eyes gave him away. His eyes were no longer playful, instead there was something there I hadn't seen before but it made my skin heat up as his gaze raked over it.

"If you were naked, I probably would be dead right now. I told you that you were trying to kill me." He reached next to him, fumbling around for something on my nightstand. His eyes never leaving me or my body. I arched a brow at him until he landed on his phone and pulled it up in front of his face.

"Don't you think you should ask permission before you start snapping pictures of me with barely any clothes on?" He shrugged and gave me a grin that melted my resolve. This man, who had probably seen hundreds of women naked, thought I was one of the hottest women in the world. He didn't have to say it, it was how he acted. I leaned back against the door, bent my left knee and placed my left foot on the door. I was attempting to look attractive and by the loss of his smile I succeeded. His eyes were full of something dark now.

"I could, but what's the fun in that? You're fucking gorgeous Faith. Though, I strongly believe you need to wear more clothes to sleep in. How many sleepovers have you had with Jax or Opie? I don't think I want to know that, I might have to kill them both." I wanted to laugh but could tell he was serious.

"More than you can imagine, but usually I doubt wear stuff like this to our sleepovers. This is my at home in my comfort zone clothes." He sighed in relief and sat up on the bed so his back was against my headboard.

" Thank God for that .Good, I thought I was going to have to strangle them, then try to imagine what to tell the club as to why it happened. I'm going to imagine you wearing some hideous granny mumu thing during those sleepovers, ya know for my sanity." I shrugged and climbed in bed next to him.

"Usually I wear a big T-shirt with some pajama pants." He tapped a few buttons on his phone then sat it back down.

"I'm very relieved, trust me on that." He pulled me against his left side. I layed my head on his chest and his left hand rested on my hip.

"Men in Black?" I ask as I notice what he put on. I tilt my head up to look at him. He smiles and kisses the top of my head.

"It's a classic and for future reference, one of my favorite movies." I couldn't help the laugh that spilled from me.

"I never pegged you for an alien guy." His index and middle finger began tracing circles on my lower stomach that he exposed so he could touch. My heart started hammering in my chest and my body heat kicked up at least ten degrees.

"Oh baby, you don't want to get me started on aliens. I'll keep you up all night with conspiracy theories." I'd much rather him keep me up all night for a different reason. Oh my God, did I just think that? I wanted to smack my forehead but at least I didn't say it out loud. He raised his brow at me and my blush intensively spread across my face.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I quickly shook my head no. There was no way I was telling him what I was thinking. I decided to go with a different truth.

"Just glad you're here with me." He smiled and pulled me back in closer to him.

"I'll accept that, even if it wasn't what you were thinking. I'm glad I'm here too." I sat up again.

"How do you know that isn't what I was thinking?" He gave me an, 'are you serious?' look. I looked down at his chest, loving the way he filled out the tank top. Do you even call men's shirts tank tops or is that a women thing?

"Whenever something naughty crosses your mind, your whole face goes red, like cherry red. You bite your lip and shake your head like you're trying to get the thought out of your head. All of which you just did." Well shit. Fuck you face and blush for giving me away.

"Shut up Josh," I say as I laid my head back on his chest. His fingers lightly skimmed over my stomach and my hip that was exposed due to my shorts. Every time his middle finger hit my hip I felt like I stopped breathing. A white hot feeling spread between my legs followed by a weird wetness feeling.

"I've never done this before," I lifted my head and looked at him confused.

"What?"

"Laying with a girl and watching a movie. I'm glad it was you, I'm not able to give you many firsts but the ones that count to me. You're a lot of firsts for me." I tilted my head back down and tried to hide my smile.

"Yeah I don't know about that. You're a hot commodity babe. Women have been beating down your door probably since you turned 16." He rolled his eyes.

"Yeah they have, but there was never any emotions in it for me. I lost my virginity to a friend of my sister's, I had watched enough porn to get the idea of what I was doing. She was staying the night and just barged into my room and asked if I wanted to have sex. Apparently she had been trying to get my attention for awhile. She still tries to hook up with me whenever shes in town, so I know I didn't do too bad. There's been so many women over the years but none of them that I did the things we do together. So many faces that I've barely registered in my head because they didn't mean anything to me, other than the satisfaction of getting me and them off. I've never took a girl on a date before. I've never had a girl stand up to the cops for me. I've never had a girl like you." My breath caught in my throat. I thought I was sheltered but this man has never known love, or at least had the kind of love that he needs. He's never had anyone go to bat for him. I would take on the world for him.

"That's actually kind of sad, I mean I've never really done the date thing either but that's because I was so sure of Opie and me. Look how that turned out. You're a good man Josh, one who deserves someone fighting for him. I'm glad I got to be there for you." He pulled me up a little higher, so I would be looking at him.

"You deserve to be fought for too Faith. I'm glad Ope was such a dumbass, because we wouldn't be here if not. My club thinks I'm crazy for even trying with you but I've never had anything make me want it this much other than the club. Trust me, I've wanted in that club most of my life like it was oxygen and I couldn't breathe without being near it. Nothing has ever come close to that feeling before you. I've never had to put much effort into women. I see one I want, I talk and smile at them and just like that I'm in them. Everything with you has been different. Shit when you walked out of that office and tried to block the sun out of your eyes, I was convinced you were an angel. Something that beautiful definitely wasn't looking at me, even with the curiosity filling your face, you were still the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Lee dragged me out of the parking lot, if not I probably would have stood there all afternoon just to stare at you. I knew you had to be mine at the bar, especially when you randomly shouted out your underwear color at me. I'm leaned up against the back wall in church with the stupidest smile on my face. Jax called me out on not paying attention to which I replied sorry I got lost. Chibs laughed and said that it's not hard to get lost because of our Faith. I didn't even know what it meant at the time but still I couldn't keep that stupid smile off of my face that came after that comment. Now, I understand what he meant. You look at me and I forget where I am, who I am. You may not think it, but a lot of Samco feels that way about you because you care about people in a way most of them never have been. They all get a smile when talking about you. You claim Happy as one of your best friends, not many people can make that man smile but he does when you're around. Juice, Chibs, Tig all of them smile the minute you walk in the room. You're special in a way you don't even realize. It wasn't until we were eating breakfast that I realized I lost some of my heart to the beautiful girl with the sad eyes and smile that would tear your heart out." I didn't know what to say or how to stop the tears rolling down my face.

"You brought me back from a place that I never thought I would get out of. I was in a deep dark hole and you're just what I needed to bring me back. I'm sorry you've never been loved like you should. Just know that I'm extremely loyal and I will go to war at any time for my people. I'm so glad you came for that run, because if not we wouldn't be here. I don't know how I lived my life before you." I kissed him and he pulled away too soon for my liking.

"I'm not a good man Faith. I've tortured and killed men. I'm not sorry for any of it. But when I look at you, I want to be better. I want to be the man you deserve." I sat up and straddled him this time without even thinking of what I was doing.

"You're perfect for me just how you are. I wouldn't want you any other way. You've been taking care of me since the very beginning to make sure I'm good and safe. I couldn't ask for anything else...well except if you lived closer. I wish I could do this more often." I leaned down and kissed him with everything I had. So much for my body calming down. His hands flew to the back of my head and deepened the kiss. I felt his tongue trying to enter my mouth and I opened it, unsure of what to do. His tongue moved slowly against mine, slowly encouraging me on what to do. I followed his lead then pulled my tongue back and sucked on his tongue, which earned my a groan. I felt him grow hard, as it was pressed up against me.

Despite my better judgement, I didn't stop kissing him. I couldn't help how amazing I felt, my head was soaring like I was flying. His hands unwound from my hair and moved to my butt. It was a weird but amazing combination of grabbing and massaging but it felt amazing. He finally pulled back and ran a hand across his face

"We have to calm down Faith, I don't want to push you and this is the farthest we've gone. So we should take a break." I nodded and laid back next to him . We watched the movie for about ten minutes in complete silence. The throbbing between my legs hadn't gone away in the slightest so it encourages me to be brave.

"Hey Josh," he turns to look at me. "I think my thighs will look really good around your head." He wasn't expecting that. He started choking on saliva. He sat up and I rubbed his back.

"What did you say?!" He asks me ludicrously. I could see the shock in his face, which made me want to laugh but I was too far gone for that now. I sat up next to him.

"I was thinking you should show me that tongue thing you were talking about earlier." He didn't say anything for a whole minute.

"Faith, I didn't say those things to make you feel like you had too. I'm cool with waiting." I shook my head and took off my shorts. I watched him struggle to swallow as he took in my panties.

"I know, but I haven't been able to get it off my mind since you said it earlier. Come on, you were bragging about your tongue skills." My cheeks were heated because he kept rejecting me. My only saving Grace was that the look on his face was anything but disgust. He was struggling with himself. He wanted to do this, that I could see but he didn't want to rush.

"You're sure about this, like 100 fucking percent sure? I don't want you to hate me." I roll my eyes and pull him down to kiss me.

"I'm sure, let's do this before I blow up." He smiled but his eyes were still full of worry. He leaned over me and started to kiss me.

"I tried to talk you down but you dont have to tell me again." His lips captured mine in a kiss that stole my breath. I ran my hands through his hair and he pulled my bottom lip between his teeth. I let out a groan and wrapped my lower body around his. I started to grind against him and he shook his head.

"Not yet baby doll, you're not getting relief until I give it to you." I pouted because I already felt like I was going to burst. He kissed a sensitive spot I didn't know I had by my ear and I couldn't stop the moan that flew out of me. He lightly sucked and my hips bucked up off of the bed. Holy shit. What was that? It felt like lightning struck my body. I don't think I've ever been this turned on before; don't think I've ever wanted something so much. I couldnt stay still. His mouth felt too good and he wasn't even where he was supposed to be yet. He left a trail of sucks and kisses down the right side of my neck. He reached the top of my tank top and looked at me for permission. When I nodded, not sure what I was nodding too but I trusted him. Plus I was too far gone to say no. He lifted my shirt up until my boobs were exposed. The cool air of the room had my nipples instantly harden if they weren't already hard enough. His left hand began to caress my left one while his tongue look over the right one. He rolled my left nipple between his fingers and I was practically panting. When my nipple entered his mouth, I thought I was going to come right there but he stopped too soon for that. I wasn't complaining, we were both anxious and if I didn't get this pressure off of my lower stomach I felt as if I would die.

His lips and tongue went down my stomach and he spent time worshipping my hip bones. HOLY FUCK I'm going to die. He sucked in the skin on my right hip and my lower half was off of the bed. Why had I waited so long to do this? I've never felt more alive and free in my entire life. He continued and lightly bit the skin. I couldn't explain how my pussy felt but it seemed to be convulsing. Is this normal? I wish I had planned better for this, I could have looked it up online to know what to expect. That was weird right? Who does that shit?

His fingers hooked my panties and slowly pulled them down my legs. He spread them apart but didn't move. He just sat there starting at my pussy and it was starting to make me uncomfortable. I tried to close my thighs but he held them apart.

"You staring at me is weirding me out." He shook his head and snapped out of his trance.

"I'm sorry, definitely not trying to weird you out. I just have never seen something so pretty before." As he said it, he lightly trailed his finger down to length of my vagina. Touching it, like he's checking if it's real I roll my eyes and hide my face under a pillow. Why did he have to go there. This is so embarrassing.

"Yeah right, you've seen hundreds of vaginas. You've seen one, you've seen them all." He looked down right appalled.

"Don't compare her to others, that's just rude. She's perfect." My next comment was cut off because his finger lightly ran along the length of my slit. Holy shit. The rough pad of his thumb pressed up against my clit and I let out a squeal. When his tongue followed the path his fingers just made, I truly lost my shit.

"You taste fucking amazing Faith. I seriously think I'm just as much in love with your pussy as I am you." My mind went blank, not even acknowledging what he said. He sucked on my clit hard and I let out a loud cry.

"Ssshhhhh Faith, you're going to wake up your mom." Despite his words, he had that full faced smile that I loved. He was enjoying torturing me. His fingers made their way to my entrance. He slid one in and waited to see if it was okay. I started moving my hips back and forth to move his finger in and out. He touched my hymen gently but after that he stopped short of it every time. I felt a twinge of pain mixed in with the pleasure but he didn't touch it again. I threw my head back in pure exstacy when he sped his fingers up. He chuckled and then slowed them down, and back up again. His tongue was back licking at me quickly. My body started to convulse again and this time I didn't fight against the feeling. I felt like my body was being taken over by some demon. I didn't even recognize the girl on the bed thrashing about in so much pleasure she thought she was going to pop.

"Josh you got to stop, I have to pee." He shook his head, causing me to buck off the bed.

"Let it go sunshine. I've got you." Is he nuts? I'm not going to pee on him!

"Okay you're officially the weirdest person. I know. Move, I really have to pee." He shook his head, swirling his tongue all around my clit.

"It's not pee you're feeling, let it go. Just relax and it will come naturally." I tried to push his head away but he bit down causing me to cry out...and feel like I peed on myself. But following the pee, I felt high. I don't think I've ever felt this serene before. I laid back against the pillows and tried to catch my breath. I looked down at him and wrinkled my nose.

"Go wash your face you weirdo." He shook his head and rolled his eyes.

"Are you kidding? This is my new favorite fragrance." He rubbed both of his cheeks like it was a new aftershave.

"Smelling like my pee? You're gross." He climbed back up in bed.

"Not pee, your come and it's fucking amazing. Leave me be and allow me to wallow in my king shit status over here."

"You know I think I take back allowing you to do that. Now you're being weird."

"Baby, I'm allowed to act like this. I just gave you your very first orgasm. I am floating on a cloud over here."

I got up and pulled up my shorts. I stalked to the bathroom and went to clean myself up. Was he right and it was just come? That's weird isn't it? Why would it feel like I had to pee? I wet a wash cloth and washed myself completely off. I grabbed another one and wet it. I walked into my bedroom and tosses it at him.

"For your face, King Shit." He let out a chuckle while doing what I said.

"You can't be mad at me for being right. It's normal for you to think it was pee. Calm down killer. It's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's natural." I roll my eyes and climb into bed.

"This is just new to me. I don't know how to act and it's freaking me out." I let out a sigh and turn to face him. He scoots down and wraps his body around mine.

"I understand where you're coming from. But just know, when you're with me I've got you. Don't worry about fear or being embarrassed because I will do anything in my power to make sure you're okay. Now let's go to sleep before your mom really does bust in here." As if my body was waiting for his command, my eyes closed and I was down for the count.

A/n. Thank you for everyone telling me about the format issue I got it fixed. I hope the sex scene was justice lol I was nervous as hell about it