Chap 9
In the jungle of the senses
Tinkerbell and Jack the Ripper
Love has no meaning
Not where They come from
Shriekback, Nemesis
The honeymoon was over and Carlisle spent the next five months trying to find the right moment to make his announcement. Each time he felt that he was ready to broach the subject, something cropped up and he backed off.
Edward was positively cheerful, which only made matters worse. The newborn vampire had decided he actually liked Vermont and their lifestyle, and had even proposed coming to work for Carisle so that he could "explore his options" on that front.
"I... don't think... that... would... be a... very... good idea." Carlisle was floundering; this was the last thing he ever expected from Edward.
"Why?" He looked hurt. If anyone knew how to work Carlisle, it was Edward.
"Well, for one thing, there is a lot of blood involved in my line of work...
"Edward, I have been doing this for a long time and still I notice it. It isn't as if it were easy to master. I think you would find yourself in a... compromising situation."
"I promise not to eat the patients!" He protested.
"Do not joke about this! You have no idea how much restraint it requires to be in that environment. It is still hard for me but my commitment to profession, my need to be useful in this world, helps me overcome the enormous …. challengetemptationurge! " And here Carlisle pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation.
But Edward pursued the matter until Carlisle reluctantly agreed he might try his hand doing some research for him - away from the patients.
And so more months passed, with Edward proudly presenting Carlisle day after day with information the physician already had. He wasn't purposely condescending, but he found it hard not to be amused by the boy's enthusiasm.
It was getting harder. He needed to bite the bullet and be done with it.
Edward had stayed home one day, which allowed Carlisle to muster all of his courage to confront him. He spent the day wandering around the hospital mumbling to himself, trying to find the right words, to prepare him, to soften the blow, to reassure him. The nurses watched nervously as he made the same trip three times to retrieve a chart before one came to his rescue and handed it to him.
"Thank you!" He was surprised. He had forgotten he was at work.
He took the long way home, circling back to retrace his steps again and postpone the moment before walking in the backdoor.
Best not to beat around the bush.
"Edward, I have to go to Italy..." Spoken aloud for emphasis but in an undertone, as though Edward were standing next to him.
"No!" A low growl from upstairs.
He had been anticipating that, and had his case prepared. You know why. We've been through this already.
"NO!" Lower still but louder so that the house shook a little.
Frustrated beyond belief – he had been having this argument with Edward in his head for the past five months - Edward, this isn't up for discussion. I have to go and I will be back as soon as possible.
Pregnant pause.
Is that alright? It was a moot question; he had known the answer for months.
Deafening silence.
Carlisle sighed loudly and capitulated, turning around to walk upstairs to him. Alright, you can come with me.
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They traveled by ship to England and then traversed the continent via railway. Trains were Carlisle's favorite mode of travel and Edward indulged him, though he knew running would have been faster.
Edward was uncertain how he felt or even should feel. He wasn't exactly frightened – he trusted Carlisle and didn't think anyone would hurt him so long as he was there. He wasn't exactly angry – part of him longed for revenge, but he knew it was best to let Carlisle deal with the matter his way; he knew Them, after all.
It was almost as if everything that had happened to him had happened to someone else. He couldn't remember large parts of it, a fact for which he was profoundly grateful, and what he did remember didn't hurt him.
He was pretty certain he would be terrified if he did remember everything.
He wasn't exactly anxious - but he couldn't explain the restlessness that left him barely able to contain himself.
He was very curious. The others. Them. The aristocracy. The ruling class. The ones with whom Carlisle had lived some eighty years. The ones Carlisle had chosen to leave. The ones Carlisle worked so hard to forget, though every so often they would creep back into his thoughts when he let his guard down.
And then Edward would see them for what they were.
But then there was his experience with Jane, and the things she had shown him. At the time, he had had difficulty reconciling his image of Carlisle with hers. But shortly after that, Carlisle had shown him his transformation and his own inexplicable behavior.
He was beginning to understand that all vampires shared common traits no matter how hard one might try to suppress one's true nature. That was why Carlisle didn't want him near bleeding bodies. He knew that Edward would not be able to control himself.
Edward really wanted to ask him if he actually had killed people as Jane had suggested, but worried that might create more tension in their relationship. Carlisle had already been tiptoeing around him the past five months trying to resolve the immediate problem. The older man was a nervous wreck. Edward certainly didn't want to add to his stress.
So he settled for the prolonged train trip and thought of other ways to coax information out of Carlisle.
"What's it like there?" They had not traveled to Italy, or anywhere near it for that matter, in their own trek two years ago.
"Volterra?" Carlisle looked up from his paper, and pursed his lips, thinking. "It's an old city, and looks very much now as it did in medieval times." I say 'now' but I haven't been there in nearly 120 years.
What? He looked at Edward.
"It's… hard to imagine 120 years." It was a bit daunting, really.
Ah, my Edward, you are so young, you wring my heart! So to speak...He laughed.
Edward's youth was a refreshing change for Carlisle.
"Stop saying that." The boy ground his teeth. It was bad enough everyone at the hospital thought him so very young; he didn't need Carlisle to start up as well. "So what was it like then?"
"Hmmm? Oh. It was a very wealthy area – mining and other industries. Alabaster, mostly. The city was essentially rebuilt from the 12th through the 14th centuries, when a new set of walls was erected, and it retained its character from that time forward; it never modernized, so it still has the original spatial organization."
It's on a hill. He added, seeing Edward's perplexed expression. It couldn't grow. No room.
"Oh." He wasn't sure what else he could say. He hated being ignorant, even though Carlisle never made him feel inferior for his lack of education.
The Voluri settled there in the 5th century. I'm not entirely sure why, but probably the trade aspect factored into their decision.
And then, matter of factly: Travelers, Edward. So when someone goes missing, no one notices.
"Oh!" That wasn't part of his lived experience so it hadn't occurred to him. They had only had to worry about not depleting the wildlife population, and where they lived, it simply wasn't an issue.
"Most of our kind has to be nomadic to avoid detection. But after 1500 years, the Volturi had grown weary of their peripatetic existence and settled in a place where they believed they could co-exist with their prey and not draw unwarranted attention to themselves. They used their wealth to buy into the local aristocracy, thereby ensuring that they could remain there indefinitely.
"They rarely leave the City. They have underlings for that. They use human actors to maintain the businesses they own. They occupy the oldest structures there, the buildings surrounding the Palazzo dei Priori, which was and is the town's center. For the most part, their lives revolve around court matters – periodically some disciplinary action is brought before them.
Exactly as we are doing now.
"They act as the ruling class by virtue of the fact that no one else is as old or as numerous as they are. They trample any potential opposition before it has a chance to develop."
"Do they think of us as the opposition?" Edward was still young and rather liked the idea. It sounded important.
"I can't imagine how they could. They don't have any love for me and my way of life, but I have always been careful not to provoke them. Honestly, I haven't seen any of them in more than a century."
I'm not sure why it happened. But I know I can prevent it from ever happening again.
Edward wondered how he could be so confident, but he sensed no contradiction between his words and thoughts, so he let the matter drop.
Carlisle went back to reading his paper and Edward stared out the train window, frowning. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask Carlisle why he had stayed so long with them, but he was still smarting from his own feelings of inadequacy for being so young and didn't want to discover that the answer was obvious.
So he refrained.
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Volterra was much as Carlisle described it. They arrived during the day, but it was so dark in the inner city, it didn't matter. The high walls prevented any light from penetrating and they could walk freely in the narrow passages without fear of being exposed.
Carlisle led him expertly through the alleys to a small inn where they booked a room (We'll need someplace to stay, away from Them.)
What he really meant was someplace for Edward to stay. Edward immediately protested.
"No, you will stay here while I arrange a meeting with Aro." And, then, more than a little exasperated, "We are not simply going to walk in unannounced!"
"Don't you think they have already figured out we're here? You were the one who said they had spies everywhere!" Carlisle's bad humor was catching. Edward had felt grumpy from the moment he asked him about the damn city.
"Protocol, Edward. Old people are keen on that." Carlisle had issues with his age as well.
Please let me deal with this. It's going to be hard enough without me having to worry about you there.
Edward lay down on the bed. "Fine." So now he was young (ignorant) and a problem.
Part of Carlisle felt the need to placate him and he very nearly walked to him to take him in his arms, but his nerves were frayed being back in his least favorite part of the world, and he wanted to get the matter resolved as quickly as possible.
He went downstairs, composed a short note to Aro, and handed it to the concierge, requesting it be delivered that afternoon. Then he walked back up the stairs to see about Edward.
Carlisle bathed and dressed hastily while Edward sat drumming his fingers against the arms of the chair.
"Am I permitted to go outside?"
"Edward, stay put, please." It's probably not the best idea to go wandering around.
"And I can't come with you?"
"I think that would complicate things. I have known Aro for a long time and I think it best if I speak alone with him first. I really hope that will be the end of it and we can start home tonight."
Edward did his best not to pout. He really wanted to be helpful in resolving the matter. "I'll just read." He pointedly picked up Carlisle's book.
Carlisle gave him a puzzled look and then turned to leave.
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Edward spent most of the evening pacing. His first opportunity to see something of the most formidable force in Carlisle's vampiric existence, and he was trapped in the room. He probably wouldn't have been so consumed with the need to know what they were like if Carlisle hadn't spent so much time trying to hide it from him.
The first glimpse he'd had of Carlisle's unedited sentiments had come after the attack. That Carlisle feared and mistrusted them was indisputable. But he sensed something much more there; a strong feeling - kinship? - for Aro. Almost - dare he think it? – a love for the vampire who had been his host for more than 80 years.
He thought back to what Jane had shown him in the woods: Carlisle, seated by Aro, watching the blood sport. It disturbed him more than he liked to admit that Carlisle had participated in anything like that. It jarred against his image of his maker as steadfast and - he suddenly felt young again - perfect.
He was confident of Carlisle's sincerity in his beliefs – he could, after all, read his mind. But if Jane was to be believed, vampires were not as unchanging as Carlisle had said they were. They could alter their belief systems over time. Not that Carlisle had ever tasted human blood or anything so base! He had told Edward he hadn't and nothing in his thoughts contradicted that.
But Carlisle was getting better at hiding his thoughts. And how was watching someone die so very different to doing the deed yourself? Had Carlisle not taught him that to sit by idly when someone was in need of help was as great a sin?
He shook his head to dispel the unsettling thoughts. He was over thinking it again, as Carlisle said he was prone to do when he had too much time on his hands. It was really very simple: Carlisle was a good man and his partner for life; the Volturi were evil and to be avoided at all costs. He knew firsthand the unspeakable acts they committed against others.
The fact that Carlisle had a few questionable deeds in his own history really wasn't the issue.
Was it?
He lay down on the bed, disturbed and discontented, until he heard Carlisle enter the front door three floors down.
Edward could feel Carlisle's distress long before the man stepped into the room.
They don't believe us. He walked to the corner to shed his coat and tie, tossing them carelessly on a chair, so very out of character for Carlisle.
"What?!" He sat bolt upright.
They say they have conflicting reports of the incident and have no reason to take the word of a newborn against their closest and most trusted Guards.
Edward was stunned but more upset by Carlisle's turbulent emotions than anything else.
Let me think for a bit. I need to calm down. Carlisle lay down on the bed beside him to close his eyes, his mind a cacophony of notions. Edward curled up beside him, resting his head on his shoulder and stroking his arm.
After a long while, Carlisle turned to kiss the top of his head. I love you! I could never be without you!
But Edward could feel Carlisle's genuine panic that something very bad was ahead for them. He shivered and moved closer to reassure him. "I'll never leave you! Never!"