A/N: Can you tell how much I like crack ships?

Say My Name

I.

Her hands were comforting.

Whenever he saw her, her hands were always glowing that cool green color. She always had a bead of sweat rolling down the side of her face, her face calm and devoid of emotion. Behind that facade, he knew she was desperately trying to save the person she was healing.

Sakura Haruno never stopped.

He often saw her walking around with a small stack of papers clutched to her chest. For Hokage-sama, he thought. After Tsunade retired, she handed the title over to Kakashi Hatake, who found the job more tiresome than the most dangerous of ANBU missions. Kakashi had chosen Sakura to be his right-hand, despite already having Shikamaru Nara as a personal consultant and strategist. Shikamaru always wondered why the older man appointed his ex-student, but one look at Sakura and he could tell why.

She was efficient and reliable.

It was easy to put faith into the pink-haired kunoichi. She was trustworthy and never spoke more than necessary. Everything anyone would ever tell her was kept in confidentiality. Handfuls of people turned to her for comfort and hundreds of others turned to her for help.

Sakura never meandered about. Every step she took was filled with purpose and thought. She planned out most of her days and every minute of the hour down to a T. He never thought she was the type to be so meticulous because she never was. The young Sakura was fickle, superficial and short-tempered. She was never able to get the deeper meaning behind certain things, and the image of her crying at the gates begging Naruto to bring their teammate back had stuck with Shikamaru for years. But the change was something to marvel at. She was a machine. A machine that worked for and at the sake of others. Sakura threw away little care for herself and while Shikamaru was impressed by her efficiency, he was also saddened that the life once brimming in those green eyes was now gone.

She was nothing more than a shell.

Sakura never let it show. She always kept a smile on her face. She never once complained nor did she ever throw a tantrum when asked the most tedious of tasks from her superiors. Even with Kakashi's lazy attitude towards paperwork, Sakura never got mad like she would have before. Shikamaru noticed that she never raised a hand nor punched her way through men anymore. He noticed that the pep in her step was gone. The way Kakashi's eye lowered whenever she refrained from telling him off let Shikamaru know that the Hokage had noticed too. He wondered what could possibly have gone through his mind whenever he saw his ex-student.

Did it come with age? Did it come with the experience of being a kunoichi? Did it happen because of the deaths that resulted with the last war and the irreparable losses that everyone—especially she—had faced? Did it happen because she was left behind by the one person she had been chasing for four years and then some?

It was no secret that she was in love with the Uchiha bastard. Shikamaru did not hate, but he could say with almost all of his being that he had a very strong dislike and distrust for Sasuke Uchiha. He always wondered why Sakura loved him. Yes, the bastard had a good-looking face and a toned body from the excessive training a ninja underwent. Yes, he had power and the name of fallen nobility—but nobility nonetheless. But fame, status and looks aside, there was nothing else worth mentioning. Shikamaru always thought Sakura Haruno was someone who looked past the superficial appearance of others and saw through to their hearts instead. He always took her for someone who would fall in love with personality rather than handsome looks. He always wondered why she was in love with Sasuke, because anyone could say that his personality was complete and utter shi—

"Shikamaru-kun."

He slowly turned his head to the person who interrupted his train of thought. Lo and behold, it was the person who had been occupying all of the space in his mind since he opened his eyes that morning.

"What's up?" He asked with a yawn. He could sense the dissatisfaction from the woman standing just a few feet away with her hand on her hip, the other clutching a stack of—oooh blue—papers to her chest.

"You were supposed to help me sort through the trade documents for the meeting tomorrow." Her tone was half-scolding and a helluva lot annoyed. Normally, people would be scared of incurring the petite woman's wrath but Shikamaru was not a normal person and, being someone who knew that Sakura had mellowed out in the last few years, was not cautious nor alert as he should've been.

He heaved a sigh as he got up from where he laid on the grass. "I thought we weren't meeting until 1."

"It's 2:40."

Shit.

"My bad." Shikamaru scratched his the back of his head. "Let's go now."

"I already finished sorting them."

That was fast.

Shikamaru felt guilty. He knew when he messed up and this time he messed up with the one person he didn't want to mess up with. He had promised her the day before to help her with the task. Even though it was a small trifle, a promise was a promise. He forgot why he even offered to help. Shikamaru was about to sincerely apologize when a strong breeze blew past them.

He flinched when tiny, tiny debris went into his eyes. He furiously rubbed them. He loved the outdoors, but dirt getting into his eyes was something he would never get used to.

Why else would people think his eyes were always closed?

When he opened them again, the image in front of him left him breathless.

Sakura's hair had grown longer over the years. It now laid along her back, her hitai-ate still sat on top of her head to hold the pink strands back. She almost never left it down and out, instead opting to wear it in the same style that her shishou had always worn. It took some time getting used to, but Shikamaru became accustomed to seeing her like that. So the fact that her hair was down now reminded him of the Sakura in the old days. The fact that her hitai-ate was clutched in her hand instead of on her head made her seem a bit sad and lost. The fact that the wind seemed to be blowing the cherry blossom strands in all the right directions made her seem like an angel.

He had never seen anything more breathtakingly beautiful than her in that moment.

But the same beautiful thing made his heart break. He would be lying to himself if he said that he never thought of Sakura in any way other than that of a friend. However, he would be lying if he said he ever thought of her with the same romantic feelings as that of a lover's. He had grown close to her ever since she became Kakashi's assistant, collaborating on plans and helping the Hokage with his daily duties. On some days, he even sought her advice on strategic plans. It was understandable why they would grow close to each other when they were always by one another's side. Shikamaru came to view Sakura Haruno as a close friend and confidant. She was not simply his friend, but she was his close friend, a title up until then was reserved only for Chōji Akimichi and—grudgingly—Ino Yamanaka.

Shikamaru had known Ino and Chōji since they were children—and maybe even before that. He got along with Chōji just fine. Why he tolerated the loud-mouthed, spoiled and troublesome blonde was a mystery to others. But anyone with a clear, logical mind could see why they were friends. While Shikamaru was quiet, lazy and calculative, Ino was loud, brash and intuitive. She balanced out his own personality and he kept her in check whenever Chōji wasn't around. Even Chōji had trouble handling Ino's spunky attitude.

But not Shikamaru.

Shikamaru knew exactly how to work with Ino, and how to control her impulses and whims. He often got swept along with her pace, only because it was too troublesome to fight back. Ino never pushed him to do anything too extreme or out of his comfort zone (which was a lot of things). She knew what made him tick and what his limits were. Sometimes she ignored them—whether to piss him off or she truly thought he would enjoy the things she wanted him to do, he didn't know. He just knew that while Ino pushed his buttons almost all the time, he truly did enjoy her company. She was the only female who understood his quirks.

Until Sakura came along.

"You're not in a hurry to get those to the Hokage?" He asked, motioning towards the blue papers.

"Kakashi-sensei said that I could bring them to the meeting tomorrow." Shikamaru noticed that she still called him her 'sensei' after all those years, refusing to adopt the new title because it was too weird for the two of them and Naruto. "Said he doesn't need to look over them cause he trusts that I did a fine job."

Shikamaru let out a snort. "You know he's only saying that cause he doesn't wanna look over them, right? It's too much work."

Sakura started to plant herself on the grass. "You're telling me. It's a tactic he's been using ever since he became Hokage."

"And you still put up with him." He laced his fingers and placed them at the back of his head, looking up at the clear blue sky.

"You do too." She shot back. Sakura paused and then giggled into her hand. "I suppose it's also because he was my sensei. I have a reason why I put up with him."

"So do I."

She raised a brow. "Oh? And what reason do you have?"

Shikamaru looked down to his feet before shrugging his reply. "He was Asuma-sensei's friend."

She stayed quiet and Shikamaru didn't look at her. He kept his gaze focused on the ground. It wasn't the first time his late sensei was brought up into conversation. Most of the time, it was by accident or in passing. Sakura never intentionally brought Asuma up in fear of making him sad.

Very like her, he thought.

She never said things that threatened his peaceful state of mind. She was always conscious of the things she said when it pertained to him, but she was always very willing to speak her mind. Sakura knew not to overstep any boundaries, but she was never limited to any conversation topics or opinions she wanted to bring up. She knew how to speak without offending, and Shikamaru really liked that about her.

He liked a lot of things about her.

The sudden thought made his face grow warm.

What was wrong with him? He had done nothing but think about the pink-haired woman for the last few days. It wasn't as though she did anything that made him think about her; she acted how she usually acted. She didn't change the way she looked; she was sitting there with her usual pink hair and red crop top with the long fishnet sleeves and black skirt. Shikamaru looked at her from the corner of his eyes.

Why the hell was she on his mind?

"Shikamaru-kun?"

Goosebumps rose on his arms. Oh, that's right. She had started calling him by his name. Well, not really. She just started putting '-kun' behind it. Sakura had always referred to him as 'Shikamaru-san.' It wasn't until a week ago when they were writing up reports that he told her to drop the suffix because it made him feel old.

"Shikamaru-san, could you take a look at these documents? Shizune-senpai requests that we have them sorted by tonight."

Shikamaru grunted. Something about that sentence irked him and he couldn't put his finger on it.

"Here. I'll take a look at them."

"Thanks, Shikamaru-san."

"Hey..." He started, looking straight at the woman sitting across from him.

"Yes?" Her eyes widened at the strict tone of his voice.

"Could you not call me that?"

Her eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. Why, was she not supposed to call him by his name? Was it too disrespectful? Were they not familiar enough to be on a first-name basis?

"Then... Nara-sa—"

"No, that's—" he sighed and leaned back against his chair, "I meant could you drop the ending? It makes me feel old. We're the same age, and we're both jōnin. I don't think you should refer to me as someone older or higher in rank than you."

Sakura was clearly troubled. She fidgeted with her hands and kept her eyes downcasted. "But... you're..."

Shikamaru placed his elbow on the table and his chin in his hand. He looked at her until she worked up the courage to return his gaze.

"We're equals, Sakura." He could see the way her pupils dilated and the subtle rise of her eyebrows. He continued as if reading her mind, "We fought alongside one another during the war. You're great. You healed everyone and even managed to call forth the Fifth Hokage's personal summon for aid. You helped Naruto and Uchiha maul through that army of clones with your strength alone. I can't count the times you've provided backup for me when I needed it." He stopped and smiled when he saw her cheeks tainted pink. "I would list some more accomplishments but I don't wanna sit here all day with this unfinished report. Besides, I don't want you getting a bigger head."

Fury lit up in her eyes. "Was that a jab at my forehead?!" She pounded her fists onto the table and leaned across the table to grill the laughing man in front of her.

Shikamaru was laughing. He wasn't sure how that was possible but he was laughing. He looked through half-opened eyes to see Sakura pouting on the other side of the table. So he did what came to his mind.

He flicked her forehead.

"Ow!" She rubbed the spot where he flicked her, the exact spot where her Byakugō seal laid.

"That's not a small feat either," he told her while pointing to the seal.

After pouting some more, she finally sighed. "Alright, alright... I get what you're trying to say."

"Good. Then drop it and let's hurry and finish this so I could take a nap." As if on cue, he let out a yawn.

"Okay...Shikamaru-kun."

His heart skipped a beat and goosebumps formed on his arms. What?

Shikamaru blamed the way the sun was setting for the glow on her smiling face. He blamed the suddenness in the change of his name for his embarrassment. He blamed the stuffy room for the way he started to sweat. He blamed the never-leaving smile on her face for distracting him for the next two hours as they sat in excruciating silence to finish up their reports.

He blamed everything.

And he still blamed everything.

What a stupid thing to get flustered over. He reprimanded himself for acting like a grade-schooler whose name was spoken by their crush for the first time.

Whoa. He face palmed and grunted. He did not have a crush on Sakura. All this thinking was getting to his head, he reasoned. That was why he was thinking about complicated and impossible things.

Was it impossible to like Sakura? No, not at all. Sakura Haruno had a lot of things going for her. She was intelligent, caring, selfless, beautiful, and strong. That didn't mean she didn't have any flaws. No, Sakura was full of imperfections. She was a woman who was overly careful. She was someone who thought very little of herself, neglecting her own well-being for the sake of others. She was too selfless and too forgiving. She was intelligent, but failed to see the bigger picture. She was strong on the battlefield and efficient in the hospital, but outside of those two worlds, she had no sense of purpose. It wasn't impossible to like her, it was impossible to love her.

When Sasuke abandoned her after the war, Sakura fell into a depressed state. It wasn't as though she expected him to change—cause knowing the Uchiha well, it would not have been an easy task. No, she just wanted him to stay. She wanted him to stay where he was closest to home, closest to her and to Naruto. Sakura knew that out of everyone, he only really cared about the whiskered blond. She never asked him for anything else.

But that one small wish of hers was too big of a request for Sasuke.

So when he left a week later with no word or letter left behind, Naruto went on a rampage while Sakura stayed locked in her apartment. It took three days for her to face the world again. Ever since then, she was like an empty shell. The small pieces that were left of her had been shattered and scattered when Sasuke left.

That was five years ago.

She never bothered to open up to someone and never bothered to look for a potential lover. Shikamaru was sure she was doing it on purpose, in fear of the same thing happening again. To say that Sakura had issues was an understatement. But to many people, they would think of it as an exaggeration. But Shikamaru knew better than most.

It wasn't because she chose to confide in him. No, she never spoke to him about anything personal that concerned herself. Being near her every day meant he watched her almost every single hour; it meant knowing how she acted and picking up on the smallest of things that she did. He had came to be able to read her mood.

But he was never able to decipher her thoughts.

"Are you alright?"

He felt a cool hand on his forehead. Opening his eyes, he came face to face with Sakura. She was so close that he could see the worry in her eyes.

"You don't have a fever..."

He realized that she was trying to check his health, probing for biological reasons as to why he was acting so weird.

"I-I'm fine." He stammered as he gently pried her hand away from his face. He didn't want to offend her, but he really didn't think her touching him made his situation any better.

"Sorry." She apologized when she sat back in her original spot.

He sat down next to her. "It's fine. I'm not sick, so you don't have to waste chakra trying to heal me."

She chuckled. "I can't heal the sick, only the injured."

"Oh?" He raised one eyebrow inquisitively.

"Well," she stretched her arms and legs out, "It's not that I can't. It's more like I'd rather leave the body to fight off a common cold or a fever on its own. Our bodies have immune systems that are able to fight off minor infections. If I heal a sick patient with my own chakra instead of the person's immune system, their body might adapt to the foreign substance and shut itself down. Certain organs and tissues will deteriorate if left unused. So, unless it's a severe illness, I prescribe painkillers to alleviate the pain and leave everything up to the human body."

"Will the body adapt that quickly to another person's chakra? Wouldn't it be the same then if you heal someone with a physical injury?"

She shook her head. "Not exactly. It's different when it's a stomach being sliced open. What we do is that we heal the torn skin and then begin to repair the damaged cells and tissues at a faster rate than what the body can repair. Our chakra works alongside the body. If you have to think about it, then think of chakra as a catalyst. It speeds up the reaction and not much work or energy is being exerted by the body itself, so that that energy can be stored up to heal another injury."

"Is it the same with poison?" He asked.

She paused to look at him and smile. "Poison is very damaging to the human body. It can damage your skin externally or kill you on the inside. Our job is to get rid of it first, and then clear out all the remaining traces of it because the blood cannot eject it quickly enough. If any vessels or parts of the body is damaged by the poison, then it is our job to restore it."

Sakura gazed at her hands. She closed them and closed her eyes, hugging herself.

"The human body is a fascinating thing. It can regenerate parts of itself and sustain a certain amount of damage before it breaks completely. It's fragile. Few things are good for us, but almost anything can kill us."

Shikamaru sensed that she wasn't talking about the anatomy of the human body anymore. The look in her eyes was far away.

"...Is that why we're so careful all the time?" He asked, not looking particularly anywhere either. He closed his eyes and listened to the sound of the wind and the rustles of the leaves.

"Nobody wants to be hurt or broken." He heard her whisper, and the tinge of sadness behind it made his heart swell.

But then she blinked and her voice became cheery. "That's why there're medics with amazing chakra control!"

He observed her carefully. That bright smile was plastered onto her face as she gazed down at his body lying there on the grass. It never faltered as she looked back at him. She hid it well, just like how she had been hiding it for the past five years.

It irritated him so.

"Valuable, huh?"

Her smile stayed. "Too valuable of an asset for the village to lose."

It could be said that her tone was mockingly sarcastic. He knew how much the village elders thought of her. While they never cared for Sakura, they deemed her too valuable for her to fall into the hands of the enemy. He was thankful that Kakashi was able to appease the elders, it was the only reason why Sakura was still able to go on missions. Never alone, though. She was always either accompanied by Naruto (not that the man minded), Yamato, Kiba or himself. As sexist as it was (and Sakura surely have noticed this but never said anything), they were the only ones capable of protecting her.

Shikamaru scoffed. Not like she needed protecting.

All the female shinobi had other things to attend to. Hinata was busy dealing with matters within her clan. Since Neji's death, the Hyūga heads had been much more strict on the poor girl. She was rarely seen out in public. Days when she was, she was always with her teammates or enjoying ramen with Naruto. Tenten was always away on missions of her own. She was always accompanied by Lee or Guy. She was doing a lot better than five years ago, mourning over the death of Neji. Ino had been training and crafting her technique from the Yamanaka clan. Sai, being the—strangely—helpful fiancé that he was, helped her during days he wasn't away on solo ANBU missions.

Shikamaru didn't know what to think when Ino confided in him that she liked Sai. His first thought was that Sai was just as socially-stunted as Sasuke. His second was that although the man had a pretty face, he was pretty rude. His third was that there was no chance of getting with her now.

Shikamaru admitted that he had feelings for Ino. She was his longtime best friend and his teammate. She understood almost everything about him. Along with Chōji, they shared the same pain of losing their sensei and they had gotten through it together. He never said anything, or let anything slip because of his own laziness. A part of him always thought they were going to end up together, but he guessed that was a miscalculation on his part. So when she ended up being engaged to Konoha's second biggest asshole, he was hurt. The pain wasn't unbearable, but it was there. It was there with a whole lot of bitterness.

But Shikamaru shrugged it off.

He was not one for conflict and confrontation made him exert too much energy so no thanks. He gave her a lazy smile and pretended that she just hadn't stabbed a kunai into his heart. He never acted any other way when they were together. He just refused ever being in the same room as Sai.

That went on for about a year.

Ino had gotten the hint and stopped inviting Shikamaru along whenever they went somewhere her fiancé was going to be present. She just assumed that he didn't like Sai not because Shikamaru had feelings for her, but because Sai was an asshole. Chōji knew, though. He was well aware of the reason why Shikamaru always avoided the pale man. They never spoke about it, but Shikamaru knew that Chōji knew. He was just thankful his gluttonous friend never brought it up.

"What should I wear tonight?"

Sakura's trill voice knocked him out of his thoughts.

"What's tonight?"

"Huh? Oh, Ino's surprise party for Sai."

He saw her glance at him before bringing her eyes forward again. He suppressed his urge to say something. What was he going to say anyway? That he didn't like Ino like that anymore? That Sai doesn't bother him nearly as much but still thinks he's a grade-A jerk? That she shouldn't look like that or be cautious cause he had moved on? Would she even really care about all that information? Probably not. But she would listen anyway.

"Is it fancy?"

"This is Ino. She's rented out Batafuraigāden for the night."

"Kami—that woman is crazy." He muttered. Then he paused. "Wait, isn't his birthday in November?"

"Yep."

"...It's only September."

"Apparently she plans on them taking a long vacation in November. Ino said she wanted to celebrate at home first."

"And she can't do it next month? When it's a month closer to his birthday?"

Sakura shrugged. She didn't understand why Ino thought the way she did. It was always draining trying to keep up with Ino.

Shikamaru could relate 100%.

"Okay... so I guess you should dress up, huh?"

"I suppose." She sighed. "To be honest, I really don't feel like going."

"Why not?" He gave her a look.

"Well, it's been a while since I've actually...gone to an event." She blushed. "I'm only going to this one because Sai's my friend."

Shikamaru grimaced. How anyone could be friends with the man, he didn't know.

Then again, his best friend went and got engaged to him, so.

"You might enjoy yourself. Ino may be reckless but she knows how to have a good time. I'm sure she invited you along cause she thinks you'll have a good time too."

Sakura smiled then, and he didn't know why. He was gonna ask but she spoke.

"Maybe. I just want to avoid her matchmaking, if possible." She sighed.

"Matchmaking?" Suddenly, his ears perked up and he sat himself straight.

"Uh," she stammered, a bit surprised at his sudden attentiveness. "Ino's been wanting me to find someone for a while now. Said how I'm too lonely."

Sakura laughed nervously. She was a bit embarrassed saying it out loud, and to a man nonetheless. It wasn't exactly a secret that she hadn't been in a relationship before. It also wasn't a secret that the only guy she ever had eyes on rejected her in the most painful way possible.

"So she's been finding candidates for you, huh?" Shikamaru knew what he was feeling all too well. He wouldn't admit it, but he knew. "Well, do you wanna meet new people?"

She thought for a second, her finger on her chin and her eyes shifted up towards the clouds. "I guess I wouldn't mind. If I get along with whomever she was introducing me to, then I guess I wouldn't mind seeing him a second time."

That was it. His shinobi senses were on alert. Shikamaru suddenly felt like he was in danger. He was ready to pounce at any immediate threat.

Only there wasn't really anything targeting him. He was just je—

"I still rather she wouldn't though. I would like to go, but maybe it's best if I don't..." Sakura suddenly felt very bothered. He would be too if he found out his friend was setting him up with a blind date.

"What if I go with you?"

"What?" Her green eyes widened about a centimeter.

"I mean, I know I'm not as handsome as a lot of other guys. I wouldn't even be a good date but what if I come with you and pretend to be your date so you—I don't know—don't get roped into Ino's plan?" He suddenly found it very hard to talk.

Then he realized something. "I'm not even invited."

"You could be my plus one!" Sakura exclaimed. She jumped up, and the stack on blue papers she was keeping beneath her leg started to fly away. She quickly grabbed them and tucked them underneath her again.

"Is—is that even allowed?"

"Of course! She said I was free to bring anyone I wanted along. I think that was just an attempt at pushing me to find a date." Sakura frowned then. She relaxed herself and clasped Shikamaru's hands together with her own. "Please, go with me."

"Uhhh..."

"Please? It will be the only thing I'll ever ask of you, Shikamaru-kun."

He gulped at his name being said from her mouth. "W-well, I did offer. So I guess I'll go if it's fine—"

"YES!" Sakura jumped. This time, she held the blue papers to her chest.

His shock was replaced with a warmer feeling. It was the first time in a long while that he had seen her that happy.

And it was because of him.

He smirked at the small accomplishment.

"Hey," he started. She stopped jumping to look at him. "We have a meeting tomorrow so we can't stay out late."

"Oh, I know." She flashed a dazzling smile. "We'll be home before the clock strikes 12."