Eddie and Jamie were sitting in the squad car about to roll out for their tour. Eddie was finally back from her mandatory sick leave and she couldn't be more excited…and more scared at the same time. She was coming back on the job without all of her senses and that unnerved her. Jamie assured her she had nothing to worry about.
"Hey, my family and I are all going out for Danny's birthday. Wanna come?" Jamie asked,
"Sure, what time?" Eddie replied, smiling up at her fiancé from the passenger's side.
"After tour at Joe's." Jamie explained, naming their favorite spot to hang out and grab drinks after a long day.
"You made it to lunch!" Jamie exclaimed, pulling up at a bodega for a sandwich and chips.
"Barely." Eddie chuckles, famished as always. "I never realized how loud New York is until you can hear all the background noise perfectly. And that guy wore me out!"
"He picked the wrong cop to run from!" Jamie laughed, knowing Eddie could probably beat him in a foot race.
Eddie smiles and they duck out of the RMP, walking into the bodega and picking up a bag of barbeque chips and ordering a BLT at the counter.
"Your total is -." The fifty-something man said, his Hispanic accent heavily prevalent.
"What was the total again?" Eddie asks as sweetly as possible. She's been asking people to repeat themselves way more than she thought she would.
"- and fifty cents." The man repeated. Eddie sighed and tried to hide her confused look. This bodega was cash-only and they rarely had updated registers which meant no monitor telling you your total. Eddie handed the man a twenty and started for the door. "Jamie, let's go. I already paid."
It was a tone that Jamie had come to recognize. That tired, overwhelmed, I-mean-it, tone he was hearing more and more often.
He waved goodbye to the man and ducked out. Eddie was sitting in the RMP, munching on chips while staring out the window. "Eddie, what's wrong? What happened?"
She sighs again, realizing that she'd be put in this exact situation a lot more times than she'd anticipated. After the initial shock of her hearing loss wore off, she thought maybe she'd be able to handle it and let it all roll off her back. It wasn't exactly working.
"The bodega owner. I couldn't hear the total. He repeated himself and I still couldn't hear him. I just gave him a twenty and left. It wasn't his fault. It just-just frustrated me because if I can't hear a bodega owner I'm certainly not going to hear a victim's family who barely speaks any English or someone's child who's scared. Jamie, am I even cut out for this anymore? I know I fought for my job back but what if they were right?" Eddie's voice is small, and Jamie's heart breaks.
"Eddie, honey, you're going to figure it out. We're going to figure it out. And you can't start with the what-ifs. This job is nothing but what-ifs." Jamie takes her hand and places a kiss to her temple.
"More like I'm going to figure it out after I eat." Eddie laughs, unwrapping her sandwich.
"Hurt feelings versus hurt stomach. I think I figured out which one just won." Jamie teases, and they fall back into their comfortable rhythm of banter and teasing and flirting and Jamie for one, didn't mind it at all.
Eddie walked into the men's locker rooms. She comes around the corner, peeking over the only open locker door.
Jamie just shakes his head. His shirt's off and he's holding his street pants in his hands, "First, you knock. And did it ever occur to you that I might not be the only one in here?"
"Well, I do a little recon before just barging in here." Eddie explained and leaned in for a smiley kiss. They hadn't told anyone at the precinct that they were together, let alone engaged. The sneaking around probably wasn't the smartest thing because they were all a bunch of cops but if they were honest, it was kinda fun.
Jamie finished changing and the locker door shut with a rattling slam making Eddie flinch. The sound wouldn't have bothered her as much a month and a half ago but she was still getting used to it all. Jamie noticed and placed an arm around Eddie's as they walked out of the precinct for Danny's birthday dinner and drinks at their favorite hangout spot.
About an hour into dinner, Jamie catches Eddie staring off after she doesn't respond to Erin trying to tell her a funny story about Danny as a kid. Jamie reaches across the table for her hand, drawing her attention back to the table.
"Sorry, I didn't get your attention first." Erin says, trying to face her, "I was just saying how when Danny and I were growing up there was this school bully and we were all getting fed up and there were these brownies they sold. I just remember them being so good so Mr. - over here-" Erin starts,
"Mr. who?" Eddie's face scrunches up,
"Mr. -" Erin repeats but is covered up by Sean, Jack and Nicky laughing uproariously at whatever video was playing on Nicky's phone.
"Oh." Eddie nods, pretending she knew Danny's childhood nickname. It probably wasn't important to the story and she'd just ask Jamie later. They were getting in the habit of doing that on the drive home or in the squad cars. They would replay the situation or the conversation, making sure the both understood what was going on. Mainly for Eddie's sake but Jamie was also benefiting from it. It's not like she could always whip out her phone and watch the recording from her hearing aids. It wasn't perfect, it took time to transfer and it drained the battery life. They had used it in one of Erin's cases and had to get TARU to clean up the audio as background noise and hair feedback was still an intrusive factor.
"And buys the guy one. And the guy eats the whole thing-" Erin gets cut off as she stresses the importance of the story.
"And I'd doused the thing in - syrup." Danny finishes and the whole group joins in on the laughter that still hadn't exactly died down from Sean, Jack, Nicky and the phone video.
Eddie laughed-she thought-pretty convincingly but honestly, she knew more about the conversation between Frank and Linda; a celebrity being arrested for a slew of unsavory charges. Frank's deep, almost booming voice just carried better across the room.
Jamie gave her a look she'd come to know all too well and just shrugged her shoulders. There really wasn't much she could do about it. Nine Reagans plus Baez crowded at a table in a dimly lit sports bar with a hundred other people yelling at the TV and having conversations of their own.
Eddie faintly picked up what she thought was an open mic night or some singer trying to be recognized. She was increasingly more aware of how her favorite spots were becoming less so due to her newfound hearing loss. The dim light was horrible for even attempting to lip read, the background noise was intrusive at the very least, other side conversations drowning out who was actually talking to her, and to be honest, it really wasn't their faults they didn't always face the person they were talking to the entire time. It really wasn't. And that's what put Eddie off the most.
She tried to brush it off but after several more lost stories interrupted she was tired. Hearing was tiring. Eddie sighed and tried to think of a believable excuse. She checked her phone for the time and tried to get the attention of the table.
"Hey guys, I think I'm gonna go. I'm taking this undercover seminar before tour and I gotta get up early. I'll see you guys on Sunday. I had fun and happy birthday Danny." Eddie tries to smile, spilling white lies left and right. She had taken the undercover class already. And she hoped no one else had remembered that fact.
They bought it at least and bid her adieu. Jamie didn't of course. She shrugged it off and made sure she had her belongings and paid her tab.
She's halfway out the door when Jamie stops her, following her out. "Hey, what's wrong? I know you missed the brownie story but, come back in. I thought you were having fun. And you don't have your undercover class tomorrow. You took that months ago." Jamie says sweetly, having pulled them under a streetlight for somewhat easier listening.
"Jamie, I can't hear. And I love your family but you have too many people. There's nine of them, plus Baez. Too many lips and too many side conversations. I can't do it anymore or at least not tonight. I'm tired, I'm really tired. We had a long tour today and I'm still getting used to it all. But I really am going to go. Text me before you come home." She would've said 'call me' but now unless for work, she barely used the phone. Even the stick-on buttons Dr. Preston gave her that were supposed to make it easier to hear, they didn't do much. It was 'you're on speaker' and headphones at max volume.
Jamie sighed and knew he should let her go. He'd go home after everyone left and she'd had some time to herself.
"Hey, what's wrong with Eddie? She seemed a little distracted or upset or something." Danny asked, as Jamie slid back into his seat almost reluctantly, finishing off his drink and shelling peanuts he wasn't going to eat.
"She's tired. Tired of not hearing bodega owners and childhood stories, tired of being excluded, tired of loud sports bars, tired of not being able to do her job the way she wants. She's tired she's not who she used to be." Jamie's voice almost cracked as he spewed her feelings and sighed himself. It absolutely decimated him inside that there was not a single thing he could do to help her other than feed her words which in and of itself could be lost too.
"Should I go talk to her? Apologize or something? I feel really bad now." Danny rubbed the back of his head, obviously feeling guilty.
"I should've known Jamie, I'm sorry." Erin apologizes likewise,
The entire table had gone silent and Jamie noticed his father's wheels were turning. His face was contorted into an almost frown-like expression as he contemplated and ran scenarios in his head. It's actually what made him a great cop and an even better Commissioner.
"I guess it's fine. I think we just need to be a little bit more careful. You know Eddie, she's carefree and outgoing, she's lost that and I'm just trying to get it back. I guess it just takes some time is all." Jamie tried to make Danny and Erin feel better while still keeping Eddie in the forefront. He wasn't letting this get swept under the rug. Eddie was too important to him.
"Hey, Jamie," Linda called from the opposite end of the table, "Let me talk to some doctors tomorrow at the hospital. Maybe I can get some info or something to make her life easier. I had a friend in high school with hearing loss. Can't hurt right?"
"Thanks, Linda. I really appreciate it." Jamie replied, a small smile appearing and not slumping so much in his barstool anymore.
"No problem." She smiles and then turns to her kids, "Hey, guys, time to go! It's a school night."
"Yeah, I should probably go too, make sure she's ok." Jamie said, pulling his wallet out, paying his own bill.
"Same here. The DA's said he's got some big announcement in the morning. He'll kill me if I'm late tomorrow." Erin joined the rest of the family, trying to part ways after their evening came to a rather eventful stop.
As Jamie and Danny started for the door, "Hey, I'm really sorry about tonight. I messed up a good night. Rain check?" Jamie prompted his brother,
"Little bro, it's completely fine. Eddie's family now, she hurts, we all hurt. And you tell her I said that. She's just not your partner now, she's gonna be your wife so get your butt home." Danny says, serious and then lighthearted.
"Amen to that!" Henry agrees as he hears his grandsons' conversation.
"'Night Pop." Jamie says, heading in the opposite way of the rest of his family.
Jamie headed to his apartment. Eddie was sure to be there as she was going to move in with him in the coming weeks.
"Hey, babe, I'm home." Jamie calls out, making sure he doesn't scare his fiancée.
Eddie doesn't respond and he figures she didn't hear him. He turns the corner and finds Eddie tuckered out on the couch, the TV playing in the background.
Jamie debates waking her up and decides against it. Knowing she won't sleep through the night, Jamie decides to settle on the couch with her and flip through the channels.
Two hours later, when he was half-asleep, he felt Eddie stir. "Hey, sleeping beauty." Jamie leans over and kisses her.
"Hey," She smiles and returns the favor. "I'm sorry for storming outta there. I shouldn't have done that. It's still new and I'm finding out things and I'm having a hard time accepting it." Eddie says, her voice still raspy.
"I know." Jamie pulls her closer so she's on his lap and his voice is close to her hearing aid microphones. And it's quite comfortable. "Everyone missed you by the way. Erin wanted to apologize, Linda wanted to talk to some of her doctor friends, Danny wanted to make it up to you; they want you to feel better. I know you think they don't exactly love you but they do; I swear they do."
Eddie sighs contentedly, hearing Jamie's every precious word. "Remind me to hug your family. And I'm the one who's supposed to apologize!" She chuckles, and realizes it's been a long time since she's had family in her life that hadn't let her down. Sure, Frank didn't exactly always love their relationship but he had never truly let her down. And she really respected that about him.
"I got you something." Jamie announces, reaching for his leather jacket haphazardly folded on the back of the couch. He fumbles for a package and hands it to Eddie.
"What is it?" She asks, opening the bubble mailer. Colorful sheets in more colors and decorations she'd probably ever seen fell into her lap.
"They're stickers for your hearing aids. They mask the beige. Linda actually told me about them after you were so dead set on being plain. And you're not plain. I did a little research and tried to get them here before you got fitted but they're just now coming. Dr. Preston showed me how to put them on." Eddie takes her hearing aids out and looks through the sheets, picking NYPD royal blue as her first choice. "I know you too well." Jamie chuckles and gives her the instructions Dr. Preston had.
Even in the middle of the night, they were able to give each other the much needed love, trust and support they'd cultivated and leaned on over the years.
And that's what made them inevitable.