The Reason
In recent days, the girls began sitting with everyone in the dining room during dinner so they could talk to members they hadn't that day. Iris seemed to take quite a shine to Xemnas, and hovered near him as often as she could. Izzie was glad she was too young to have serious feelings for anyone. If she weren't, and she began liking Xemnas a little too much, Izzie had a feeling her maternal instinct would have her busting his kneecaps.
That brought her to her own crush on Saїx.
That's all this is, right? Just a crush. I mean, I've been in love before. And this isn't as intense as that. But…then again, I've always been unable to stand people like him. I should hate him, not like him.
Izzie ran circles in her own head trying to figure it out, and got absolutely nowhere. She didn't talk to Iris about it-again, Iris was a kid-and like she would talk to anyone in the Organization about it. She didn't need Axel or Demyx going off and blabbing to Saїx.
"So do either you or Izzie have any other abilities besides being strong and fast?" Xigbar asked Iris, who was sitting to his left next to Xemnas.
"Yeah," She replied, her voice turning a little sour. Izzie, who was sitting at the other end of the table and speaking with Luxord, looked at her and smiled a bit. Xigbar chuckled.
"And I'm guessing it's not you." As he spoke, he looked down to Izzie.
"How is it that certain vampires have other abilities beyond the norm?" Xemnas asked her. The low chatter at the table quieted as everyone listened, waiting for Izzie to answer.
"When a person becomes a vampire, every part of their body, mind, and spirit becomes heightened. That's why all our senses are so strong-the transformation enhances them. To that end, any talent or skill a person had before the transformation is also brought into this new life, and greatly profound. Most of our talents affect the mind, but there are also gifts, such as Celio's gift of elemental control, that affect the physical world."
"How many different gifts are there?" Xemnas asked.
Izzie tilted her head. "Of the known gifts, there are twenty-two categories. But, no two gifts work exactly the same as another, because no two people are exactly the same,"
"There's telepathy, precognition, pathokinesis, shields, relationship identification, happiness induction, mental invisibility, sensory deprivation, pain illusion, relationship manipulation, addictive contentment, tracking sense, physical attraction, hallucinators, enhancers, diminishers, ability identification, elemental manipulation, lie detection, enhanced self-preservation, power transferal, and hypnotic vision." Iris listed all the known powers a vampire could possess in rapid succession, making Xemnas sigh a little. He would have to hear that all again later if he wanted to remember it.
"Those are also known as active talents," Izzie continued. "There are also passive talents, abilities not quantifiably supernatural, but known as a vampire's strongest characteristics,"
"For Izzie, her passive talents are compassion and beauty. Other passive talents are things like speed and strength," Iris said. "Mine is speed."
"So do either of you have active talents?" Xemnas clarified.
"I'm in the shield category," Izzie replied. Vexen looked up from his dinner plate.
"And what does a shield do?" He asked.
"Mine protects me from mental attacks."
"Does it only protect you, or can you shield others?" Xemnas inquired, pleased that her gift was actually unique. Izzie looked toward Iris, who shrugged her narrow shoulders. She looked back to Xemnas.
"I can protect others with it," She replied. "I can also lower it to allow others into my mind. It's not something I do often."
"Show us." Izzie blinked, a little taken aback by the sudden demand.
"That would be difficult. Everyone's power here is physical, and my shield only defends me against mental attacks."
"Maybe it would work against Larxene's power," Iris pointed out. "It worked whenever that lady Nina tried to shock you, remember?"
At this suggestion, Saїx's head jerked up and he threw at glare at the child sitting diagonally from him, though she didn't seem to notice. After a few milliseconds, he caught himself and went back to pushing the peas on his plate around. What was that about? He wondered. His reaction went unnoticed by everyone, and Izzie tilted her head.
"Well, I suppose we could try it." Again, Saїx reacted, flinching at Izzie's agreeing to allow one of the most sadistic members of the Organization to zap her, but he kept his mouth shut. This time, Xemnas noticed, and lifted his chin.
"Is there a problem, Saїx?"
Izzie turned her attention to him, and when he looked up, he was once again glaring. "No, sir." He replied, though he didn't sound happy.
"Then, let's begin."
In the Grey Area, Izzie and Larxene stood opposite each other, everyone else surrounding them and watching with curiosity. Standing to the left of Xemnas was Saїx, seething with quiet resentment. Izzie lifted her arm toward Larxene and nodded. Electricity sparked all around the hand Larxene raised, and it didn't escape Saїx's eye when her mouth twitched into a small smile.
It was strange. This little vampire was a mere acquaintance at best to him, had the latent desire to kill him, and every time they interacted they usually ended up arguing, but yet the very thought of Larxene using her power against her nearly drove him mad with anger and something else. Worry? Could he worry about someone? Whatever it was, it made his chest burn, made him want to tackle Larxene to the ground before she could touch Izzie. It was hard to force himself to stay still.
Larxene lay her hand on top of Izzie's arm, the sparks jumping from her hand to Izzie's. Saїx's breath halted. He fully expected the brunette to go crumpling to the ground, but…There was no response. The tiny bolts of electricity danced along Izzie's hand and forearm, making small static sounds, but Izzie didn't so much as flinch. Larxene frowned and upped her voltage, the sound getting louder as the yellow bolts grew in size.
"It's obviously not working." Saїx growled before he could stop himself. Larxene's hand left Izzie's as she turned to look at him, along with everyone else.
"That's right," Xemnas agreed. "Now, let's see how well you defend others." He looked over at Saїx with a tranquil expression. "Saїx?"
Now it was Izzie's turn to become worried. Before she could stop herself, she said, "No."
Many of the others raised their eyebrows at such a bold refusal, looking around at each other. Some even snickered, expecting Xemnas to punish her. He took a deep breath, then glanced toward Iris.
"Very well. Shall we try with Iris then?" Iris's body visibly tensed as she turned her wide eyes to him, shocked. Izzie's lips parted, baring her fangs as she took a step toward him.
"Are you crazy?" She hissed. Xemnas just smiled, and gestured to Saїx.
Resigned, Saїx came to stand beside Larxene, his eyes narrowed as he looked down at Izzie. She gave him an apologetic look.
"Focus, Izzie," Axel called. "Or he's gonna be hurting." Saїx had half a mind to tell him to shut up, but bit his tongue. Izzie, however, glanced at him in panic before looking to Larxene, who looked like she'd been waiting her whole life to zap Saїx. Iris nervously shifted her weight back and forth, looking from Izzie to Saїx.
Taking a deep breath, Izzie lowered her head and closed her eyes, focusing all her energy on projecting the shield that always protected her. Larxene lifted her hand to hover just over Saїx's shoulder, a smug look on her face. After a couple moments, something exited Izzie's body, floating around her in an orange haze, and as it expanded, something like solar flares swirled around the outer perimeter of it. She opened her eyes and fixed her gaze on Saїx, willing her shield to extend toward him. It crawled slowly over to him, eventually touching his chest and spreading over the rest of his body.
It was very warm, and tingled where it touched his skin, but not in an unpleasant way. As it encased his body, a low humming sound reached his ears, something he hadn't heard before it had touched him. There was also a feeling of indescribable peace and calm, like several sets of phantom arms were gently embracing him. Once his entire body was surrounded by the shield, Izzie inhaled sharply, her eyes screwing shut. Iris frowned at the reaction, but Saїx didn't see it, for his eyes were closed as well.
Larxene brought her hand down on his shoulder.
This time, Saїx really doubted that the shield would protect him from Larxene's electricity, but, once again, he was wrong. While there was a slight, buzzing sensation against his skin, it wasn't painful. It was more annoying than anything.
Izzie, breathing heavily, opened her eyes and watched while Saїx processed the sensation on his shoulder, noting that he hadn't immediately crumpled under any kind of pain. Larxene saw this as well, and once again, upped the ante. The buzzing became a little more electrified, but still wasn't painful. Saїx opened his eyes.
"I feel it," He said. "But it doesn't hurt."
"Ugh!" Larxene groaned, tossing her hands in the air as if she'd thrown in the towel. Izzie sighed in relief, her shield retracting from Saїx and retreating back into her body. As it sank into her, her muscles relaxed, and she swayed on her feet, but only a little. Iris flitted over to her, looking up at her curiously.
Luckily for them, Xemnas didn't seem to have anything to say-to them, at least-for he turned silently and began in the direction of the Round Room, Xigbar and Saїx trailing behind him. The rest of the Organization began dispersing, some heading for the bedrooms, others moving to sit on the couches and chairs.
Izzie lightly wrapped her fingers around Iris's wrist and led her to the Hall of Empty Melodies.
Once they were there, Iris said, "I have never seen you react that way to shielding someone. Did he hurt you or something?"
"No," Izzie replied, still sounding breathless. "You know how my shield allows me to feel what the people I'm shielding feel?" Iris nodded. "Well, the things that Saїx was feeling all just…punched me in the face. I have never felt another's emotions that strongly before." Iris gave her a look.
"But I thought Saїx was unemotional."
"He's not aware of them, I think. I have no idea how he could hide it if he was."
"What was he feeling?"
"Every negative emotion there is. Anxiety, confusion, disgust, fear, sorrow, rage…But because he refuses to express anything he feels, they were buried. Years and years of repressed emotion that couldn't wait to be channeled just came into me."
Iris let out a breath, her arms crossing. "And I bet he never felt more peaceful than when your shield touched him."
"Saїx is suffering." When Iris looked at Izzie, she was shocked to see a look of torment on her face, like she was the one suffering instead of Saїx.
"Whoa. Iz, I get that you're compassionate, but why do you care so much about someone who's been so unpleasant to you?"
She shook her head a little, her hair quivering against her arms. "I don't know. Usually I can't stand people who behave like him, no matter what their damage is, but there's just something about him that makes me want to help him."
"I think he'd be resistant to help," Iris said.
"I know that."
Iris stared long and hard at the young woman who had been her mother for the past three hundred years. Izzie was gentle, loving, and compassionate, but she also had no tolerance for cruelty or jackassery. This was the woman who would choke you with the same hand she fed you with if you switched up on her. Normally, if anyone behaved the same way Saїx did to her, especially right off the bat, she wouldn't have anything to do with them. Iris was utterly confused as to why he was so different.
"Izzie, do you, you know…like Saїx?" She asked. Izzie sighed.
"Yes."
"What about him attracts you?"
"I don't know."
"Maybe you wanna be a savior or something to him. Fix him. But you know that never works and that's how people get hurt."
"I know!" Izzie groaned, leaning her head back on her shoulders. "Look, I'm not gonna push anything. I'll…mind my own business." Iris narrowed her eyes.
"You hesitated."
"No, I didn't! Ugh…I wish I could talk to Alex."
Iris huffed, moving her hands to her hips as an offended look took her features. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Izzie closed her eyes, shaking her head. "Nothing, hun. It's just Alex is an adult, and understands this better than you or even I do. He might be able to help, was all I was saying."
Shortly after she finished speaking, they heard the quick footsteps of Demyx rushing toward them. He swung his body around the corner.
"Hey, guys. Xemnas wants to talk to Izzie." She nodded, and looked back to Iris.
"We'll pick this conversation up later."
Xemnas had decided that later on, he'd send certain Organization members back to Blackfoot Creek to gather more information on it, and when he did, he wanted Izzie with them, just in case they happened upon any other supernatural creatures. Even though Izzie was a little irritated that he wouldn't just let her and Iris go back, she'd be grateful to stop by the house and get their own clothes. She was getting tired of wearing clothing bought from Twilight Town.
After the conversation she had with Iris, she was avoiding Saїx even more than she usually did, basically staying away from the Grey Area entirely and even skipping out on dinner. This, in turn, made him even more crabby than he normally was. Over the next week, he was a complete nightmare to everyone; short-tempered, hostile, and critical. Why, he didn't know, but that didn't stop him from being a royal pain in the ass.
One night, shortly before dinner, Axel and Demyx begged Iris to take them to Izzie, who was spending the bulk of her time hiding away somewhere in the castle, so they could plead with her to at least join them for dinner. Izzie jumped, surprised, when they slammed the doors to the library open and practically crawled up to her, one on either side of the chair she was sitting in.
"For the love of God, Izzie, please just spend five minutes in the same room as Saїx," Axel begged, grabbing one of her hands and shaking it.
"He's running us ragged," Demyx added, taking her other hand. "I don't know how much more abuse the others are willing to take before someone throws a punch at him."
"And then we'll all be really screwed. Please, Izzie. Just sit with us at dinner. You don't even have to look at him! Just please, please, please come." She stared at them for a minute before lightly pulling her hands away, folding them in her lap.
"How are you so sure I'm the reason Saїx is being so hateful? Maybe he's just having a bad week." Axel gave her a look.
"What, do you think we're blind? He's never been this awful before. I was kidding when I said maybe he likes you before but now I'm not so sure."
"C'mon, Izzie. Please?" Demyx whined. She sighed heavily, not making a move to stand.
"Look, I'll get Lexaeus and Xaldin and the four of us will not hesitate to drag you to the dining room kicking and screaming, alright?" Axel threatened.
"Ugh! Fine!"
Saїx tapped his fingers impatiently against the table, waiting for Axel and Demyx to drag their slow asses to dinner. He had things to do, and every minute those two were late was another minute added to his overtime. Finally, the door to the dining room opened.
"About time." He growled. Then he looked up. Behind Axel was Izzie. She glanced quickly at Saїx before looking back down at the floor, sitting down to the right of Larxene. Iris took the spot next to Marluxia, and Axel and Demyx took their seats.
"Good to see you again," Luxord said to Izzie, who smiled sheepishly. "I was beginning to forget what your face looked like."
"I don't think anyone could forget such a pretty face." Xigbar commented, wiggling his eyebrows at her. She shook her head at him, but her smile became more amused. Saїx scowled at the table.
"Yeah, maybe now someone will settle down and quit being a yellow-eyed monster." Axel mumbled, pointedly looking to Saїx before shoving a forkful of ravioli in his mouth. Izzie glanced up, her brows furrowed.
"Isn't the expression green-eyed monster?" She asked.
"Uh, yeah, but that's for jealousy. I changed it around because Saїx's eyes are golden and instead of being jealous he's just being a pain in the ass." Axel answered before he took a swig of juice. Saïx glared at him, using just a little too much force as he speared his food with his fork.
"What's wrong?" Iris asked Izzie, who was staring down at the table, a shocked look taking her features. She was silent for a few moments before looking back up, straight at Saïx, and for the first time in a week, she looked him in the eye, seeming to study his face. When she spoke again, her voice was very quiet.
"Saїx, what color do you see in my eyes?" He cocked an eyebrow, giving her an incredulous look.
"Green." He replied after a moment. After he responded, everyone gave him a funny look, all besides Iris, whose eyes just widened as if she'd realized something.
"Um…Saїx?" Demyx hedged. "Izzie's eyes are red."
"Didn't know you were red-green color blind." Xigbar teased. Saїx turned a glare on him.
"I'm not."
"Excuse me." Izzie quickly stood from the table and hurried away, Iris calling after her. Everyone looked around at each other, confused, before Xemnas said,
"Iris, care to explain?"
Iris sucked in her lips, her own red eyes focused on the tablecloth, before replying, "I…really think I'm not in the position to say anything." She then looked up at Saїx. "You should go talk to her."
Izzie sat on a balcony in a very remote area of the castle, staring up at the heart-shaped moon, her knees pulled to her chest and her chin resting on her arms. So this was it. This was the reason she felt so weird, why she felt so strongly for him.
"Isabella. There you are." She didn't turn at the sound of the flat, emotionless voice behind her. She had heard him walking down the hall toward her. Saїx stood out of her sight for a moment, quietly observing her before coming to stand beside her. He looked briefly up at the moon before turning his golden gaze down to her. "What was that about back there?"
Izzie took a deep breath before looking up at him, her eyes zeroing in on his irises. Golden to everyone else, but to her…
"Saїx, you can see my original eye color," She began.
"Your original eye color?" He repeated. "I had noticed when you first got here that you kept saying your eyes were red, but I didn't see them that way." She nodded a little.
"When I was human, my eyes were green, but now they are red. They haven't been green for a very long time. Everyone sees my eyes for the color they should be, not what they were. And…the same goes for you," When she focused on the expression on his face, she saw him frowning, and figured she'd have to explain further. "Saїx, I don't see your eyes as being golden. I see them as being green."
At this, Saїx seemed to recoil, but the only change in his expression was that his lips parted-just a fraction of an inch. Uncomfortable silence fell on the two for several long moments before he said,
"And the significance of it?"
Izzie sighed and pulled herself to her feet, her gaze fixed down at the silent city below. "Well, vampires typically see the original eye color in another because they are…special, to us."
"Special?" Saїx repeated.
"Special as in…you know…the one."
He stared at her a good minute before scoffing. "That's impossible."
"I understand you don't have the emotional capacity for this," Izzie said. "But our past behaviors make sense with this explanation. You could've very well left me to my own devices when the Heartless swarmed the castle, but you actively sought me out."
"I only did that because you have a heart," Saїx grumbled.
"Then why not protect Iris? She has a heart too, and she's more fragile than I am being a child. You were even in the same room as she was when they attacked. Would've been easier to just stay there, wouldn't it?" She turned to look at him and saw he was glaring at her. She held her hands out at her sides. "I'll gladly retract my conclusion if you can come up with a viable reason you needed to protect me out of obligation." Saїx continued to glare at her, but kept his mouth shut. Izzie took a step toward him. "It wasn't obligation, was it? It was instinct, a compulsory need more basic than eating or sleeping. You didn't think, didn't stop to rationalize, you just acted, because even though you were completely unaware of it, you wouldn't be able to stand if I were gone. Even if you can't process emotion, there's a need in you that wants me around. And I want you around. Whether we like it or not, that's just how it is."
"I could never be what you're saying I am," He said. "I can't feel."
"I know that, Saїx. I'm only telling you the truth. I don't expect anything from you."
"You'll come to expect something from me. Whether it be love, or affection, or…intimacy," He made a face when he said that word. "You will. You might not now, but you will, and that will only set you up for disappointment." Izzie shook her head, and Saїx sighed. "Stubborn," He mumbled. "Fine, believe what you want. But know that I tried to warn you. I am too broken for you to fit into me. I don't want any of this. I don't want you to wait for me, and I certainly don't want you to fall for me. Remember I said that."
Izzie gazed up at him as he turned his back and walked away, his pace brisk, like he couldn't wait to be away from her. She let out a long sigh, fighting back tears as she did.
…