"... I'm telling you, my man. Take her to a rundown den of lowlives. Preferably one so dirty that the fleas got their own damned fleas. You are close to Junior's. Take her there."
.
I was writing down all this stuff while my advisor was on the scroll.
.
Neptune was merciless.
-"Order the Chicha. Explain to her that the beverage is chewed up corn. You spit it and let it ferment."
-"Will be a far shot from the champagne she is used to."
-"And make her pay for it!"
.
Neptune was on a roll.
-"Order the smelliest, maggot-infested Casu Marzu. That stuff is ILEGALL. The cheese got maggots for Oum's sake!"
-"You are evil. I like it."
-"And for the grand finale; shout to the whole place that you are going to make her scream."
.
My grandfather would have tanned my hide for that.
-"That will get me slapped in public. Automatic grounds for annulment then and there."
.
Neptune Vasilias, my Rejection Coach, smiled broadly.
-"Trust me. This plan is fail-proof."
.
.
The pungent smell of vomit assaulted my senses.
I moved and a thousand hammers started beating down my head.
I cracked one eye and the light burnt my retina.
Pee. Gotta pee.
I dragged my half-unconscious body over the clothes strewn all over the floor. I only tripped twice.
Once my business was done, I got into the shower and enjoyed the stream of water. I saw something off on my left hand. Inspecting it closer, it looked like a golden tattoo in my ring finger.
Weird. It looks funny.
I inspected it while still enjoying some nice water running down my form.
The work was a simple circle going around my finger. It had some inscriptions but with the poor lighting, I couldn't quite discern it.
Need to get some pills for the headache.
Now that I didn't smell like a rotting carcass, I grabbed some towels and dried myself with one hand. The other was twisting and moving around the tattoo.
.
When I exited the shower my foot caught up on some clothes.
This looks like Weiss' bolero. She will be upset when she realizes someone stole it.
.
A low whistle startled me.
-"Hellooooo handsome~".
.
I looked up and saw her.
Weiss Schnee. She was on the bed. The same bed. Using my shirt.
.
Ooookkay, this...is bad. But still can be salvaged. Somehow.
.
Then she buttoned up my shirt and I saw it. A matching gold tattoo on her left hand.
.
I fell on my knees, dropping my towel.
-"Why? What did I ever do to you?"
.
Weiss bit her lips.
-"I can recall-"
.
I looked up and shouted to the heavens.
-"WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!