AN: So Yeah not really sure why this mini bunny started running through my head but it did. I must say I was rather amused by it Quite possible because I'm sleep deprived or stoned or maybe a combo of the two. Anyway this oneshot is about an ex taking a cheap potshot at the other via song only to be ridiculed by the answering song. There is some fluff and a split second of angst that is quickly resolved. I was tempted to make it an all out song wars but that wouldn't have been feesible and even less realistic than I already made it.
Love it, Hate it let me know.
As always they only thing I own are the errors and the plot, otherwise I'm just playing with the characters.
DANCE MY PUPPETS DANCE! MWuahahahah... oh wait... this thing is still on... shit.
Anyway enjoy.
The Bellas and Aubrey , who happened to be in town visiting, had decided to go to the Karaoke bar for their bonding night in an attempt to try and cheer Beca up. She and Jess had broken up two months ago. No one knew the details why it happened but to any one that would listen Jesse was saying that Beca cheated on him. Now anyone who knew the tiny Bellas co captain, knows that she despises cheating and cheaters so it's not even in the realm of possibilities that she would ever cheat on her partner. What the Bellas didn't know was that the Trebles apparently had the same idea to make it a karaoke night.
Walking into the bar Stacie and Amy immediately spot Jesse and the Trebles and offer to change the venue.
"No. Jesse's presence here doesn't mean a thing. We came out to drink and listen to songs be butchered by other people who have had too much to drink. We are doing this." Beca declared. The Bellas cheered at her words and Chloe gave her a side hug.
"Alright let's do this. I'm buying the first round of shots." Amy hollered out.
"Oh god," Beca groaned. "What have I just gotten myself into?"
Chloe and Stacie laugh at the small Dj and they each linked their arms through hers and guided her to a table with the rest of the Bellas.
Thirty minutes later Beca was cringing to a very off key rendition of Truly madly deeply and decided to get a fresh drink at the bar. Chloe nudged Stacie and motioned to where Jesse was standing by the DJ booth, glaring at Beca as he submitted a song.
"That can't be good." Stacie said to Chloe as they watched the Treble captain out of the corner of their eyes.
"Do we warn her?" Chloe asked.
Stacie thought about it for a moment before shaking her head. "No. no matter what he sings, if it's directed at Beca she will have a song in return. You know how she is, she's a damn encyclopedia of music."
"That's very true. She was the one who told us about the song that I sang to Tom when I broke up with him." Chloe agreed.
"Oh yeah that was great. Even funnier finding out that it was originally sung by a drag queen."
"You guys must be talking about You think you're a man." Beca stated causing Chloe and Stacie to jump and let out small giggles.
"See encyclopedia." Stacie giggled out.
Beca just shook her head as the two erupted into a fit of giggles, deciding it wasn't worth the energy to find out what was so funny.
The Bellas watched as Donald came over and spoke directly into Beca's ear for a moment. The tiny DJ smiled and nodded holding out her fist for the treble to bump.
A few songs later Donald's name was announced. The Treble smiled and got up on stage.
He began to sing and Beca surprised the others by harmonizing before Donald started rapping Pimpin all over the World by Ludacris. The Bellas were up dancing as were a few other regulars. When it was time for Kat Williams, Beca hopped up on the stage and delivered the lines perfectly with her trademark snark. Now she did alter the lyric some by replacing 'Nigga' with Playa as she just didnt feel comfortable uttering that word. Beca handed her mic over to Donald and hopped down off the stage and received a couple of high fives and Amy thrust a shot into Beca's hand.
"Bottoms up Shawshank." Amy yelled out over the cheers.
Beca clinked the shot against Amy's and tossed it back, wincing at the burn.
"Fuck, that was Jose wasn't it?" Beca gasped out at the Australian and received a grin as her response.
Soon Jesse's name was announced and as soon as the music started, Beca was up at the DJ booth putting her song selection in.
"Told you so Red."
Benji shook his head once he realized what song Jesse was about to sing. He caught Beca on the way back from the booth and apologized, telling her he had tried to talk his friend out of singing this song.
"It's not your fault Benji. You're not his keeper. Besides Jesse is a big boy and he just wrote a check that his ass can't cash.
Whoa oh oh
Ooh ooh
No no no
Benji shook his head once he realized what song Jesse was about to sing. He caught Beca on the way back from the booth and apologized, telling her he had tried to talk his friend out of singing this song.
"It's not your fault Benji. You're not his keeper. Besides Jesse is a big boy and he just wrote a check that his ass can't cash." Beca replied.
See, I don't know why I liked you so much
I gave you all, of my trust
I told you, I loved you, now that's all down the drain
Ya put me through pain, I want to let you know how I feel
"How do you mean?"
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses, they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
"Well for one the pretty blonde that he was with isn't going to feel too great that the guy she came with is singing to his ex not to mention the song is degrading. Doesn't exactly leave a good impression. We broke up two months ago and I know that he has already been out with multiple girls. She's going to figure out that all she is to him is just another distraction."
You thought, you could
Keep this shit from me, yeah
Ya burnt bitch, I heard the story
Ya played me, ya even gave him head
Now ya askin' for me back
Ya just another hag, look elsewhere
'cause ya done with me
"See what I mean? He's here with her but he's singing about how I allegedly gave another guy a hummer. No one wants to be with someone who is bitterly obsessed with their ex still."
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Ya questioned, did I care
You could ask anyone, I even said
Ya were my great one
Now its, over, but I do admit I'm sad.
It hurts real bad, I can't sweat that, 'cause I loved the hoe
"Yeah I see what you mean now. It's too bad. Amber could have been good for him."
"He made his bed." Beca replied.
Fuck what I said it don't mean shit now
Fuck the presents might as well throw em out
Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack
Fuck you, you hoe, I don't want you back
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh hun yeah
Oh oh oh oh
Uh huh yeah
The entire time that Jesse sang he glared at Beca and the more she seemed unbothered the angrier he got. He was annoyed that she was more engrossed in her conversation with Benji than listening to the song. She should be embarrassed and upset, possibly even crying by now. Instead she clinked her glass against his best friend's and made her way back over to the Bellas just as he was finishing.
"Yo cap, You aight?" CR asked once Beca got to the table.
"Yeah I'm good."
"Shawshank call it in the air!" Amy demanded as she flipped a coin.
"Heads..? Why am I doing this?"
"Not important." Amy dismissed as she showed Stacie the results.
The leggy brunette pumped her fist in the air and hurried her way up to the DJ booth she flirted with the DJ to get her request up as soon as possible.
Beca shook her head and wondered why she even bothered asking in the first place.
"What did Benji want?" Aubrey asked.
"Oh he wanted to apologize. He felt that he owed me one as he tried and failed in convincing Jesse to not sing what he just did. I let him know that it wasn't his fault nor is he Jesse's keeper. I'm going to duck out for a dart. If my name is announced, come get me please."
Aubrey's nose crinkled delicately at the mention of Beca smoking but the small DJ only smoked when she was seriously annoyed, stressed or the beginning of her anxiety sneaking up on her. Right now the former captain knew that under the calm aloof exterior, Beca was annoyed to hell and back.
Beca came back inside just as Chloe, Aubrey Stacie and CR got up on stage and sang Raising Hell, Chloe picking up Big Freedia's lyrics as she could hit the bass notes since her nodes had been removed. The girls packed the dance floor for their song. While they had been up singing, Beca bought a round for their table.
Beca was called up and when she asked the DJ what song she laughed and asked to borrow his snap back that he had been wearing over his do-rag.
"Alright, I'm going to need some back up here so Donald, you owe me one dude bring Uni with you."
As the music started Beca placed the hat on her head and began the song like she was telling a story, Donald and Uni chiming in before she began to sing. Getting everyone minus Jesse to clap along.
Chloe let out a laugh as it was Afroman's Colt 45. She and the Bellas laughed even harder as Beca made the motions of what was happening each line delivered with a cheeky smile or her smirk. At the end of the song Beca gave the DJ his hat back.
Benji and some of the Trebles got up and sang Oh Cecilia, the Bellas joining in from their table, Beca Donald pounding out the beat on their tables respectively.
Beca got up on the stage when her name was called and her ever present smirk was in place as she threw a wink at Benji. Once the music started Beca turned her attention towards Jesse and her smirk turned vicious.
No oh
Oooh
No no no
You know there are two sides to every story.
See I don't know why you cryin' like a bitch
Talkin' shit like a snitch
Why you write a song 'bout me
If you really didn't care
You wouldn't wanna share
Tellin' everybody just how you feel
Fuck what I did was your fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out
Fuck all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, fuck you right back Beca held up both her middle fingers at Jesse.
Fuck what I did was your fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out
Fuck all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, fuck you right back
You thought you could really make me moan
I had better sex all alone (ha ha ha ha) Stacie ended up spitting out her beer as she laughed at the lyric.
I had to turn to your friend
Now you want me to come back
You must be smokin' crack
Im goin' else where and thats a fact
Fuck all those nights I moaned real loud
Fuck it, I faked it, aren't you proud Beca smirked as Jesse's friends and the other Trebles could be heard hooting and hollering at him.
Fuck all those nights you thought you broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex was wack
Fuck all those nights I moaned real loud
Fuck it, I faked it, aren't you proud
Fuck all those nights you thought you broke my back
Well guess what yo, your sex was wack
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
Whoa whoa
Uh uh yea
Beca hops off the stage and walks to where Jesse is sitting with a pretty blonde girl)
You questioned did I care
Maybe I would have if you woulda gone down there
Now it's over Beca looks over at the girl quickly and shrugs before pointing at Jesse's crotch)
But I do admit I'm glad I didn't catch your crabs
I can't sweat that cause I got to go
Even more laughter and jeers at Jesse were heard as Beca makes her way back up to the stage to finish the song.
Fuck what I did was your fault somehow
Fuck the presents, I threw all that shit out
Fuck all the cryin' it didn't mean jack
Well guess what yo, fuck you right back.
Oh oh
Uh uh yea
Oh oh
Uh uh yea
Oh oh
Uh uh yea
Oh oh
Uh uh yea
You made me do this
Beca blew a sarcastic kiss at Jesse as the Bellas, Trebles and the rest of the bar patrons applauded, and calmly walked off stage. She had to bite back a laugh as the pretty blonde looked absolutely disgusted with the Treble Captain. She stopped in front of his table and stared down at him.
"Maybe next time you'll think twice about attempting to slut shame someone, let alone someone who never cheated on your sorry ass." Beca turned her attention to the pretty blonde that was sitting at the table looking extremely uncomfortable.
"I do apologize to you Amber, I'm sorry that you are dating someone who is a complete jackass and doesn't know how to get over a breakup that was two months ago. Let me tell you the real reason we broke up. While with him I realized that I am gay. So I did the right thing and I broke it off with him. His fragile little ego couldn't handle this tidbit so he has gone around telling anyone and everyone that I cheated to save face. I know about some of the people he has hooked up with since we split and if you have already done the deed with him, go get tested." Beca walked away from the table as the occupants sat there stunned by her little revelation.
"What did you just tell them?" Aubrey whispered in Beca's ear causing the younger woman to shiver as the blondes lips brushed her ear.
"The truth as to why I broke up with Jesse, oh and that if Amber made the mistake of sleeping with him already to go get herself tested. Jesse has been sleeping with the class bicycles."
Aubrey's jaw dropped in shock. "You didn't?!"
"I did." Beca shrugged. "I'm not ashamed of who I am."
"Did you tell them if you were dating anyone?"
Beca shook her head no. "They don't need to know my business."
Aubrey nodded once and turned her attention back to her best friend. Chloe looked over at Beca and glared at the younger woman after Aubrey spoke to her.
"Wha?" Beca mouthed at the redhead baffled by the glare.
Chloe just shook her head in disappointment and turned away from the tiny DJ.
Beca sat back in her seat for a minute before saying fuck it and went out for another smoke. CR found her outside 10 minutes later.
"Chloe is upset with you."
"I know and I have no idea what I did to upset her this time. Seems like that's all I ever do lately." Beca replied quietly as she played with her Zippo, a birthday gift from the redhead.
"Just sing her a song. You know how she loves that."
Beca nodded as she lit a second cigarette. "Can you put my name in at the booth?"
CR nodded and Beca gave her the song and artist. CR patted her captain's shoulder receiving a small smile the brooding DJ. Five minutes later Beca came back in and grabbed a bottle of water from the bar.
Once back at the table CR gave her a small thumbs up letting her know that she was able to get her name in. Beca nodded twice and sat back to listen to others sing for awhile. Neither Chloe or Aubrey acknowledged her presence and Beca just let out a sigh before returning to the bar. She finished her water and asked for two old fashions. She quickly tossed them back and asked for a double.
Chloe looked over at the bar and frowned when she saw Beca there tossing back her favoured whiskey drinks like they were shots. When Aubrey asked what she was frowning at Chloe explained what she had seen. Aubrey just shrugged and advised her best friend that the DJ was a big girl and could handle herself.
Beca let out a snort as she finally tuned into what was being sung currently. Someone was actually doing a decent version of Cher's Just like Jesse James. She couldn't help but think how the lyrics:
I know tonight
Somebody's gonna win the fight
So if you're so tough
Come on and prove it
Your heart is down for the count and you know you're gonna lose it
Tonight you're gonna go down in flames
Just like Jesse James
Were dead accurate at the moment. She sighed once again. Her name was called again. She downed the double, wincing a bit before once again making her way up onto the stage.
"What is this the Beca show?" Jesse snarked out as she walked by.
"No, they just happen to appreciate the talent of someone who isn't a bitter self absorbed STI infested dick." Beca replied into the mic with a sarcastic smile, ensuring that the entire bar heard her.
Beca took a deep breath and nodded at the DJ letting him know that she was ready. As the music began Beca looked at the Bellas table.
Oh I had a lot to say, was thinking on my time away
I missed you and things weren't the same
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry, it makes me want to die
Jesse had smirked thinking that the song was for him when he heard the first verse until he realized that Beca wasn't even glancing his way at all.
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all things I said to you
And I know, I cant take it back.
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby, the way you make my world go round
And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry
This time I think, I'm to blame
It's harder to get through the days
You get older and blame turns to shame
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right
And when I see you cry, it makes me want to die
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all things I said to you
And I know, I cant take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby, the way you make my world go round
And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry
Every single day, I think about how we came all this way
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried
It's never too late to make it right
Oh yeah
Sorry
I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue
I'm sorry about all things I said to you
And I know, I cant take it back
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds
And baby, the way you make my world go round
And I just wanted to say, I'm sorry
Beca finished the song with tears in her eyes refusing to let them fall.
CR nudged Chloe as Beca stepped down off the stage. "Go get her red."
"What? Why?" Chloe asked.
"Our tiny captain just sang that for you." CR explained a bit unsure.
Chloe smiled softly before pointing to the front of the stage.
"No she didn't."
CR was stunned speechless at what she saw. Aubrey had her hands on Beca's face and was kissing the tiny DJ as if her life depended on it.
"You see I was upset with Beca because she hurt Aubrey's feelings. Aubrey was feeling like a dirty secret. The two of them have been dating for the last six weeks. You know how Becs is extremely private. She was wanting to keep their relationship on the dl so they could see if it was actually more than just lust. The two of them have had toners for one another since Beca's freshman year. Brey knew that it was real feelings on her end and she told me that two weeks ago, Beca had finally admitted that it was real for her as well. When Beca didn't tell Benji that she was dating someone let alone that it was Aubrey when she revealed the real reason her Jesse broke up, Aubrey felt like the dirty secret especially because none of you guys knew."
"Well damn. We all thought that prickly ray of sunshine was with you." CR replied as she watched the tender moment between Beca and Aubrey continue.
The two had come up for air and were resting their foreheads against one another, hands on each other's cheeks, thumbs gently rubbing along cheekbones.
Chloe let out a belly laugh. "Nope, I'm just the best friend who has helped our resident badass understand her feelings and teaching how to let someone in. Besides, as hot as the sex would be between us, I don't think my new girlfriend would appreciate it." Chloe gave a small grin and blew a kiss to Stacie who was watching the redhead.
"Damn red, get it." CR stated approvingly as the leggy brunette blew Chloe a kiss in return with a saucy wink.
Chloe gave the black woman a smirk that would make Beca proud.
"You bet your fine soulful black ass I will."
CR let out a loud laugh at Chloe's reply and held her hand up for a high five that Chloe gave whole heartedly.
Beca and Aubrey came up to them, holding hands each with a small smile on their lips.
"You guys ready to head out? Amy left with Bumper when I was out having a smoke. Jashley are just in the washroom. Emily is saying goodnight to Benji." Beca looked around for a moment. "I see Flo going outside and Lily is right behind her."
"Yeah I'm ready, let's bounce." Stacie agreed, CR nodding in agreement as well.
"So shortstack, you have been with this fine ass woman and keeping it to yourself. Tsk, that's a shame." CR began as they made their way out the door. "But I gotta say, I can't blame you, I'd want to keep her all to myself for as long as I could too." CR teased causing Beca to blush.
Aubrey just smiled and kissed Beca's cheek.
"Well yeah, I mean look at her. She's gorgeous, smart as fuck, her soul is beautiful as hell and for some really strange reason beyond me, she actually likes me for me and wants to be with my grumpy sarcastic ass." Beca replied before lifting their joined hands and kissing the back of Aubrey's hand.
Aubrey leaned down and whispered something into Beca's ear, causing the small DJ's face to go blank as she swallowed hard.
"I think you broke her Bree." Chloe laughed at out seeing Beca's blank expression.
Aubrey just gave a smug smile and wrapped her arms around the shorter woman pulling her back into her front and holding her close. Nuzzling the shorter woman's neck leaving teasing kisses and nips. Nobody noticed that Jesse had come out the doors.
"Get off my girlfriend!" Jesse yelled at Aubrey as he stepped towards the two women, snapping Beca out of the lust filled stupor that Aubrey had put her in.
"I'm not your fucking girlfriend Jesse and don't you ever yell at MY girlfriend like that again. You do and we are going to have a huge fucking problem." Beca growled out as she stepped out of Aubrey's embrace.
Benji and the rest of the Trebles came rushing out the doors and circled Jesse pushing him back away from the two women. Aubrey had one hand on Beca's back gently rubbing circles in an attempt to ease the angry tension that the Small DJ all but vibrated with. As the Trebles managed to put some space between the two groups, Beca turned and kissed Aubrey before stepping away to have a smoke. The tiny DJ looked over at CR and Lily and an unspoken demand to protect Aubrey and the others as they waited for Jashley to come out. Beca unconsciously began to hum to herself as she smoked. Stacie laughed softly as she recognized the tune and muttered a soft "Damn musical encyclopedia". Chloe quirked an eyebrow at her girlfriend. Stacie shook her head pointing at Beca and then pointing at her ear. Chloe laughed softly as she recognized the tune as well.
"Let go of me!" Aubrey cried out angrily.
Beca's head whipped up and she was in front of Aubrey before the others could blink.
"Is that your hand on my girlfriend?" Beca growled out at the moron as she decked Jesse with her nasty right cross breaking his nose.
"I'll watch you leave here limping." Beca advised her ex just as she kicked him between the legs, causing him to crumple, howling in agony.
Jashley who had come out just as Beca dropped Jesse, and the rest of the Bellas watched as couple of the Trebles hauled Jesse up to his feet, berating him and asking him what the fuck he was thinking grabbing Aubrey like that as they dragged him away.
Stacie whispered to Chloe: "Wait for it."
"There goes the next contestant." Beca growled out as Aubrey fussed over her girlfriends hand making sure it wasn't broken.
Once she was satisfied that Beca had not broken anything, Aubrey grabbed the back of the DJ's head and claimed her mouth in a searing kiss. Once they needed air, Aubrey broke the kiss and grabbed Beca's hand dragged the DJ behind her into the closest cab yelling out that she would see everyone in the morning.
"So glad that Beca moved into the sound proofed room in the basement. I love my best friends dearly, but I don't need to be hearing them. I heard Aubrey often enough when we lived in the apartment together." Chloe commented in amusement.
Stacie laughed at her girlfriend.
"C'mon babe, lets get everyone back to the house."
Thirty minutes later the Bellas were a block away from the house when Stacie let out a small laugh.
"Only Beca could beat the hell out of someone to song lyrics that were about beating the crap out of someone for touching their girlfriend. Once again maintaining her badass reputation."
The rest of the Bellas giggled lightly as they agreed with the leggy brunette and enjoyed the quiet as they made their way home.
Songs used with full lyrics:
Fuck It - Eamon
FU Right Back - FrankEE
Sorry - BuckCherry
And of course the song Beca used to knock out Jesse:
Next Contestant - Nickelback