[Apollo]
Leaving the Council Chamber alive after that argument was a miracle.
Actually, no, the miracle is that I managed to dodge the Master Bolt when Father began throwing it around like it's a toy when I told him that we should give the minor gods a vote and a seat on the Council.
I basically only brought up the terms that Percy once gave us after the Titan War; to claim our children and to respect the other gods. But apparently this is too hard to do.
That got me going off on them again.
The perfect balance at telling them that their unclaimed children are a liability and knowing that if they find out which of their own children betrayed them was difficult to find, especially since they're all thick-skulled morons who will kill their own children even if they're still innocent.
In the end, I left the Council Chamber both successful yet not.
I made every single Olympian claim their children that are at Camp or over 13, then and there. But they refused to even contemplate letting the minor gods have a say or a cabin at Camp- they probably only let Uncle Hades get his own throne and cabin today because he was sitting right there.
This is a mess of epic proportions.
oOo
They were still arguing when I left, even though the session has already been concluded.
I went straight to my temple, fleeing the calls of Artemis and Hermes for me to wait.
My temple felt empty, a loss of life, lonely as I felt. I threw myself onto a fainting couch, sighing and rubbing my face with my hands. Instinctively, I let my form fade from my usual flawless self into the mortal form I had after I denied regaining my godhood.
Lester, with his light brown- almost dirty blond- hair, with his normal proportionate mortal body- and abs I worked so hard to earn, with his flab and stretch marks and acne scars. For a second, I felt like me again.
"Is that what you looked like?"
I closed my eyes, wishing I could ignore the presence of my brother.
"Yeah. This is what I looked like as a mortal." I snarked, "Wasn't I stunning?"
The couch dipped beside me. "For a mortal, perhaps."
"For a mortal." There may have been some bitterness in my tone as I replied, "I loved being mortal. Don't get me wrong, at first I hated it- nearly committed suicide- but then I started to love it. The freedom, the worries, the mortality, everything came to an end. I loved it."
"Apollo," he started, but I cut him off.
"Don't. Just… don't."
His hand suddenly cupped my cheek and brushed away tears that I didn't even know were there.
"Does it hurt?" I didn't have to ask him for clarification.
"Yeah," I whispered. "It hurts so very much."
"Will you tell me about it?"
I wanted to shake my head, refuse, scream at him and curse his very existence for asking.
"There's this girl." I said instead. "Her name's Meg, she helped me when I was mortal. She was my best friend."
His silence was comforting. I continued.
"She's 5 now, soon to be 6. I want to- I have to…" I stumbled over my words, my famous eloquence gone. "Her father will die soon. I can't leave her to be taken by those- those monsters again."
"Then do it." Hermes stated simply.
"What?"
"If she's in danger, go help her. You're allowed to now, there's no Laws preventing you from stepping in."
That revelation sent me reeling. I can change this. I can save Meg from Nero.
I opened my eyes.
My sight was blurry from the tears, but Hermes' concerned face looking down at me was clear.
I surged forwards, burrowing myself into him, soaking in his warmth, and sobbed.
He held me, whispering sweet nothings.
"I'm sorry," I begged. "I'm so sorry."
"It's okay," he insisted, confused. "You've done nothing wrong."
"But I did!" I insisted. "I was stupid, and reckless, and I hurt so many people."
"Brother," he sighed. "You shouldn't-"
"I should!" I cried, "It's my fault! I hurt you!"
He grabbed my head, forcing me to look into his eyes. "Then I forgive you. If you really believe that you hurt me, then I forgive you."
Tears welled up once more, and I threw myself back into his arms.
"Thank you." The words felt like a prayer, whispering them over and over. "Thank you."
His hand stroked my back, steadily calming me down. "I know. I know."
oOo
I cried until I couldn't anymore.
The sun was rising, I could barely feel myself doing so.
I refused to let go of Hermes. I don't think he minded from the way that he clung back.
"My son," he spoke up after hours of silence. "Is he…?"
"One of the heroes? Yes." I replied numbly, "Luke was a great hero. I wrote a song about him."
I did. After the Titan War, I wrote a song about the heroes. I rewrote it after I became mortal- removed all the lies about me being great and truthfully sang about what the demigods had done.
"What happened?"
I hesitated, "Maybe it's best if he told you that."
"Apollo, please."
I couldn't face his begging.
"I-" I started, but cut off. No, that's not the way to address this. "He was the greatest of them all, but Hermes, sometimes, when you've been a hero for long enough, you grow so angry."
I couldn't stand to look him in the eyes.
"Kronos is smart, he knows how to isolate and manipulate you until you believe everything he says because he's brainwashed you and made you doubt everything you've ever believed in. Luke was broken, an easy target, and he held onto him."
Hermes let out a choked sound.
"But he fought it. He fought with a fierceness that I don't think I'll ever be able to achieve. When it happened, 'A hero's soul cursed blade shall reap,' he gave his life freely so he could save us all."
He was silent for a while.
"Was it my fault?"
I shook my head and grabbed him by his shoulders. "No. Never say that, it was Kronos' fault."
"Apollo, don't lie to me." He sounded resigned to it all.
"I'm not!" I insisted passionately, "It wasn't your fault!"
I could tell that he didn't believe me, but I also knew that nothing I could do or say would lift the guilt he has wrapped around his shoulders.
I suppose we're in the same boat with that.
But I'll try anyways, I won't just leave him behind like last time.
A/N
So, Back to angst! Sorry not sorry, I like siblings supporting each other