"You must choose."
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars
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Anakin-
Do I have a choice?
Can I ignore temptation's voice when it echoes the voice in my head
counting down the hours before I see my wife dead?
I've wondered, pondered, where do I belong?
would it really be wrong when all along
I've known the Jedi do not practice peace alone?
Are they out for their own?
I have seen them blind to so much while sitting on their council throne,
using their moral crutch to excuse the way they use their power
and let the monsters in this galaxy devour those they should be protecting.
No wonder so many are defecting.
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At first, they refused to train me.
From the beginning, they disdained me.
Even Obi-Wan called me a useless life form,
when all I'd done to earn his master's interest
was warn him of a sand storm and offer him a place to rest,
my home and what little my mother and I had
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Was what I'd done so bad?
I raced a deadly race, and for my bravery,
they left my mother in the chains of slavery,
then they called me out on my fear
that she and I would never be near each other again.
They expected me to be inhuman and then
dismissed me when I was not.
Their careless treatment now amounts to a lot in the decision I must make.
For force's sake!
I was a child, but my power was clear.
So what if I was a wild card in terms of fear?
They could have helped me instead of reluctantly letting me stay
with a man who had just lost his master and had no way
to master the art of child-raising. He tried so hard, but Jedi he may be,
it did not prepare him for a slave child set free.
They never thought through their uncharitable ways,
and as I grew, my powerful displays frightened them into distrust.
They fought me at every turn; it burned when I tried so hard only to be spurned
for my efforts, and when I showed signs of frustration,
they said I must be patient.
In other words, it didn't matter. Suck it up.
"We didn't turn a nine-year-old out onto the streets and that should be enough."
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Obi-Wan was like a father to me, even though he didn't choose me.
Even though unprepared, unlike the rest, he cared.
We've had our fair share of differences, I've near lost it at his dismissiveness
when he said they were just dreams.
He is a good man, I'll give him that, but he is a flawed man,
always obeyed the law man,
doesn't understand man,
but'll try to lend a hand man,
will do what he can man,
but will always do what he must, and in those cases, he broke my trust.
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Ahsoka isn't here.
She left after the Jedi abandoned her out of fear for their reputation.
Yes. Their reputation.
We need to separate religion and state because for politic's sake
they almost let a loyal Jedi die.
A child so full of potential,
so faithful, so often essential to their cause,
but as soon as there was any doubt, their applause turned to turned backs,
leaving her defenseless to attacks.
I believed in her still, stood by her against their will, and proved her innocence,
but it was too late. She'd already lost faith.
She thanked me but left me alone.
Though a citizen, she outranked me in bravery.
For I was not brave enough to also break away from the Jedi way.
Now she's far away and can not hear my plea.
Please, someone stop me from choosing!
I know my conscience is losing.
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Padme doesn't know.
She wouldn't understand.
The force to her is an unknown;
she's never been touched by its hand.
She doesn't have darkness lurking in the corner of her mind,
waiting for her to find a reason to call its power.
I am alone in my choice in this final hour.
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Who do I listen to? Who do I trust?
What do I do, will I do what I must?
Will I see through the lies of the Jedi?
Or will I let go and let my love die?
What do I do? What choice do I have?
I can not listen to each voice that I have,
for they are all contradictory, but only one promises victory.
I am alone. I should not be alone. I feel alone. I do not want to be alone.
I am alone with a blue blade as my only aid.
I watch a battle on with fear,
wondering how to interfere.
I must choose.
AN: I'm getting some real "To be or not to be" vibes from this.
Up next: The consequences of Anakin's choice.
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