Disclaimer: Still not mine. Title is courtesy of the amazing Explosions in the Sky.
(BTW—I changed my pen name. I was belleserenite for a long time, so it was time for a new name!)
A/N: Still AU/AH. I'm so glad people are enjoying this story, especially because I was pretty sure it only made sense in my head. As always, my sincere thanks to all reviewers, story alert-ers, favorite-ers, etc—seriously, it makes me all warm and happy. So please, keep reading, keep reviewing, and (hopefully) keep enjoying!
A/N 2: This took a little longer than I thought it would! And once again, I had these really long scenes written that I really liked but they felt too off (so I deleted them, then cried). Also, I feel like I should warn everyone about just how long this fic is shaping up to be—I mean, guys: 32,000ish words and it's only been 3 chapters + a prologue? It's gonna be massive; hope everyone's okay with that!
Last thing: Just a warning—I'm moving next week…moving to another country so it might a little bit before the next update. But it will come, never fear! Also, I made a teeny tiny change to SPN angel lore but it's really minor, so hopefully it doesn't pull anyone out of the story.
Happy reading and let me know what you think!
the birth and death of the day
4.
"We made a deal," Sam says over his plate of noodles, and Caroline looks up sharply because Sam and Dean's track record with deals leaves just a little to be desired. At her expression Dean swallows the enormous serving of spaghetti he had just shoveled into his mouth and elaborates for Sam, "Not that kind of deal. More like…an alliance."
"So literally a match made in Hell," she says flippantly, wrinkling her nose as Dean takes another huge bite. "Dean, if you're gonna inhale half a plate at a time, you should at least chew. Helps with the whole not choking thing."
"The demons weren't in Hell," Castiel says, eyes focused on his own fork as he twirls his spaghetti into an ever-growing pasta ball. "They were in Washington, D.C."
Caroline stares at him and has to bite down on her tongue to not say, No shit, Sherlock. But she's so not in the mood to disclaim sarcasm and she thinks it probably would feel a little like kicking a puppy. "Thanks for the explanation, Cas." She turns back to Sam. "So what was the big rush? What happened?"
Sam has just taken a bite of food so Dean takes over again, "Demons losing their shit. Sammy here went all Demon Whisperer on 'em and we've got ourselves a demon army. And they're spreading the word, so all the creepy crawlies are heading this way."
"And they've sworn to lay off the locals," Sam adds distastefully once his mouth is empty and he makes a face. "After the Apocalypse, though, it's truce over. Back to kill or be killed."
Caroline shakes her head, remembering what Bonnie had said about getting the hybrids back to Mystic Falls and remaining unconvinced. "I just—it still feels like this is what the angels want. Wipe everyone out and there's no one left to protect humans. I know," she hurries when she sees the look on Dean's face, "it's a risk we have to take. Bonnie said the same thing, but it just feelsoff somehow. Like we're getting played."
Sam sighs and says patiently, "It's because we are getting played. The angels came up with a pretty brilliant plan, Care—they want to take out as many supernatural beings as possible but we have no hope in defeating them before they let the devil out unless we have a ton of help. Help from supernatural beings."
"But what if no one from our side even went to the fight? What if we just concentrated on keeping the lid to Hell shut?" Caroline offers hopefully, looking from Sam to Dean with bright eyes.
"Because if we do that, we risk losing demon support. As soon as Daddy's home, they'll have to go to bat for the other team," Dean says darkly, stabbing at an errant noodle. "And trust me, it'll be easier to fight off angels than it will be to lock up Hell."
"Fine," she says, defeated, twirling her own spaghetti listlessly. "But I hope you know what you're doing."
Dean snorts and says, "Speaking of getting played. Pretty rich coming from the girl who's encouraging that creepy-ass hybrid vamp. Yeah," he adds when she shoots Castiel a look of betrayal, "You aren't going to be alone with him again, got it?"
Her eyes flick to the slight—but thankfully unnoticed—dent in the stove. Caroline had lied through her teeth about how she'd gotten her hands on the Angel Killing Sword—it involved the sword passing through a long chain of people before ever reaching her. Which she supposes isn't totally untrue. "Don't worry," she mutters. "That's not happening ever again." Dean gives her a short, approving nod before concentrating on slurping up the remains of his spaghetti.
"How're things going on your end, Cas?" Sam wants to know and Castiel tears himself away from his spaghetti noodles.
"The Horsemen prove elusive," he tells them. "But I'm not finished looking." He pauses then continues, "I may have found an ally in the Host."
Caroline's heart skips a beat. "An angelic ally?"
Castiel nods. "Nothing is confirmed. But she is becoming more convinced."
"Whoa," Dean interjects, hand going up. "There are chick angels?"
Caroline shoots him a glare and reprimands him under her breath, "Sexist," as Castiel responds bemusedly, "Of course."
Dean shakes his head as though trying to clear it. "Okay, so this angel that's coming around to Team Human. Can we trust her?"
"She was my superior in the garrison," Castiel says quietly, something like regret flickering across his face. "She is very honorable."
Great, Caroline thinks resignedly, because what the world's really been missing is a female angelic Elijah.
Dean leans forward interestedly. "Could there be more? More like you and her?"
"It's possible," Castiel replies hesitantly. "But discovering them would require discretion and delicacy."
Dean's face falls. "Both of which you suck at," he says dejectedly and Castiel looks mildly offended before espousing thoughtfully, "At the beginning of creation—human creation—the Lord placed humanity above all else. The Host of Heaven was to regard your kind as precious and those who refused became Fallen." He pauses to heave a sigh. "With God's extended absence, many have forgotten this—or have decided to manipulate it. But there is hope yet that some who remember the value of humans to the Lord do not want to use destruction to force His hand."
"If God does show back up, Heaven's gonna look mighty empty," Dean comments and Castiel nods gravely in agreement.
…
Klaus's bracelet slips and slides over her fingers as she plays with it, the diamonds throwing rainbows on her walls as they catch the fading sunlight. It really is beautiful and Caroline hates that it keeps cropping up because her willpower is only just so strong. But keeping it feels somehow like losing—losing the game of push and pull, losing her pride, losing a part of herself that feels crucial.
There's a knock at her door and Sam pokes his head in. "Hey," he says and she immediately picks up on the patented Sam Winchester concerned voice. "Everything okay? You seemed kind of out of it at dinner." She waves him in and he sits down at her desk chair, eyeing her carefully. She scoots down to the edge of her bed, not looking away from the bracelet.
"Can I tell you something if you promise you won't tell Dean?" she says without thinking, and then winces internally because she really hadn't been planning on telling anyone about how this stupid—beautiful, sparkling—bracelet ended up back in her possession. But she can't seem to stop herself from total disclosure when it comes to Sam. One of his eyebrows goes up incredulously.
"Could this hurt or kill you?" he asks and Caroline wrinkles her nose. If Klaus hadn't killed her or at least snapped her neck in the middle of his last fit of rage, then she is fairly certain he isn't planning on any murder or maiming as far as she's concerned.
"I don't think so," she says simply, words echoing through her mind—all those secret looks; you're the pretty little thing that had my brother in a fury; if I find out that you are just playing with my brother, Caroline; you're beautiful and strong and full of light. "No," she corrects herself quietly. "This can't hurt or kill me."
"Then I promise I won't tell Dean," Sam says, although he doesn't look quite convinced at her answer. She holds the bracelet out to him.
"Klaus gave me that," she tells him, "on my birthday. I gave it back to him the night of the ball and…and he didn't take it all that well." Sam doesn't freak out, which is a good sign. He inspects the bracelet, the links that remind Caroline of infinities glittering, before handing it back to her. She takes it and resumes sliding it over her fingers.
"I told him I couldn't be bought," she continues, color dancing across her ceiling as the diamonds wink in the light. "Then he came over here yesterday and we got into this really ugly fight and then I found it back on my nightstand this morning." This last sentence she says in a rush, avoiding Sam's eyes.
When Sam is silent for longer than she expects, she risks a glance up. His hand is on his forehead but—she breathes a small sigh of relief—he doesn't look pissed, only worried.
"I'm going to give it back to him," she says to fill the quiet. "Well, technically, I'm giving it to Rebekah to give back to him, but the end result is still the same, so whatever."
He still doesn't say anything and the uncomfortable silence is making her squirm, so she starts babbling. "Seriously, does he think he can make up for everything he's done by giving me some stupid bracelet? He killed Jenna, and only because she was my replacement! I mean, Damon rescued me before he could kill me and I'm supposed to just forget that and fall for his stupid lines about beauty and light and—no!" She punctuates the end of her tirade with huff, having unintentionally worked herself up into a temper. "Say something."
Sam sighs. "I don't know what you want me to say, Care. A half-crazy ancient and temperamental hybrid has this weirdly intense fixation on you but I don't think there's anything anyone can do about it. And clearly staying away for him isn't working since neither one of you is leaving the other alone."
"But—no, Sam, I—" she splutters but she honestly has no idea what she wants to say, because it's not like that's untrue. After all she had sought out Klaus on more than one occasion.
"I get why he likes you, though," Sam says thoughtfully and his gaze becomes distant. "When you're surrounded by darkness and anger for a long enough time, someone so genuinely good starts to look like an escape—like a way out." Caroline blinks in confusion at the longing in his voice and then, with a sharp pang, realizes that somehow this conversation has shifted from being about Klaus to being about Sam.
"What was Jess like?" she asks softly, rubbing one of the bracelet links absently. Sam's eyes go down to stare at the floor and she thinks, Way to be insensitive, Forbes. "You don't have to—" she begins sheepishly and Sam shakes his head and says, "She was amazing. She was smart…and funny and nice to everyone. She had this way of lighting up a room and she loved so completely. Every day that I was with her felt like…" he struggles for the words, and Caroline feels tears threaten at the corners of her eyes. "She was joy," he says finally, "and I was better when I was with her." Beautiful, strong and full of light, Caroline thinks sadly, equal parts wishing she could have met this girl who had so fully captured Sam's heart and resenting her for taking a piece of it with her when she died.
She reaches for his hand and he grasps hers tightly in return. "I'd bet money that that's why Klaus likes you," Sam says firmly, the haze of memories still shadowing his eyes. "You're like Jess, Care. You love with your whole heart and without reservations or conditions. And for someone who has to compel or sire people to love him—"
"Or dagger them and leave them in coffins for hundreds of years so they can't leave him," she adds darkly, and Sam laughs a little.
"Or that," he agrees, "For someone like Klaus, you've got to be like…like morning after a thousand years of night." She blinks rapidly at him, touched.
"Wow, Sam," she says softly. "Pretty poetic for an almost lawyer."
Sam smiles a little and replies, "Don't tell Dean. I'd never hear the end of it."
"I'll keep your secret if you keep mine," she promises.
He reaches for the bracelet that she had forgotten in her curiosity about Jess. "It is a really nice bracelet," he muses. She nudges him with her foot. "I liked your present better," she says with a small smile, taking it back from him and sliding it into her bag to give to Rebekah at school.
There's another knock at her door and Dean doesn't wait for the all clear to come in. "I want pie," he announces and Sam rolls his eyes at Caroline. "Dean, when do you not want pie?"
"There's cobbler in the fridge," she points out, stifling a giggle and her eyebrows rising.
"Yeah, and that's fine and all, but I want that caramel pie the Grill just got. Either of you want me to bring you back a piece?"
Exchanging identical looks of exasperation, Caroline and Sam both stand up. "No thanks," Sam tells him, clapping Dean on the back before sending Caroline a grin over his shoulder as he leaves. Dean rolls his eyes and mumbles, "Freak," before raising his eyebrows questioningly at her.
She considers him thoughtfully and says, "I mean, if you're going anyway…apple, definitely," and Dean grins. "That's my girl," he says, winking at her and she follows him down to the front hallway. "Cas," he calls out and Castiel looks up from the molding book in his lap with a frown. "Want pie?"
Castiel stares at him as though he's just sprouted an extra eyeball. "No," he says incredulously and Dean shakes his head pityingly at Caroline before he says, "Shouldn't be long."
Except it is.
Two hours later, Sam's foot won't stop tapping erratically and Caroline says anxiously, "We should go check the Grill. Maybe he got distracted, and it can be really loud in there so he might not have heard his phone?" Might not have heard his phone fourteen times, Caroline? She's so not helping herself calm down.
Sam glances at the clock on the wall. "Five more minutes," he says resolutely. "We give him five more minutes, then we go look for him."
Even Castiel looks a little worried and Caroline can't even begin to let herself go there—can't even think what it could mean if the angel that literally yanked Dean out of Hell is casting low, nervous looks at the clock.
Finally, finally she hears the distinct rumbling of the Impala's engine and she springs up out of her seat and basically runs out the door, Sam not far behind her.
Dean gets out of the car and frowns at them as she and Sam both start flinging questions at him—The hell were you, Dean; and you can't just disappear like that, Dean, not after everything! God!
"Inside," is all he says, tone as brusque as John Winchester's ever was, and he brushes past them into the house. Sam lets out an irritated noise and says, on Dean's heels, "What the hell happened?"
Dean waits until they're gathered around the kitchen counter, Caroline and Sam shooting matching glares at him. Castiel peeks his head in but when he sees the look on Dean's face, his expression becomes extremely uncomfortable and he retreats back to the safety of the living room without a word.
None of them even notice. "Met your psycho stalker boyfriend at the Grill," Dean growls in Caroline's direction and she pales, her stomach flipping as her eyes rapidly scan him for any obvious injuries. When she finds none, she can barely manage to protest weakly, "He's not my—" before Dean continues as though she hadn't spoken.
"Dude's a creep, Caroline, and I don't care if he spends the rest of his undead life saving puppies or kittens or freaking babies from burning buildings. He's straight up evil. No more secret meetings, got it? None." He turns his attention to Sam and Caroline feels herself deflate; she wants to sink right into the floor. "Did you know about that?" He emphasizes that by jerking his head in Caroline's direction.
Sam sighs and says, "Not until recently."
Dean throws both of his hands up, looking at them with furious disbelief on his face. "Great! So not only is the world's longest running serial killer obsessed with my little sister, but he also has an open invite into our house and she lets him in and no one's even a little bit concerned by any of this?"
"Dean—" Caroline starts (but she has honestly no idea what she even wants to say, because it's not like any of that is wrong) but he cuts her off by gripping her shoulders tightly and saying fiercely, "Don't let the romantic drawings and the Cinderella dresses turn you into an idiot, Caroline! Use your brain here. He's got a thousand years of experience playing the charmer, but in the end, he's still a monster. He's not Tyler Lockwood—you can't save him by being his friend."
Swallowing hard, she has to give Dean credit because he knows exactly how to isolate her motivations (even the ones that are buried so deeply that she's unaware of them) and that pierces right through her heart. Tears prick behind her eyelids as she nods silently and she's pretty sure she's cried more in the past two weeks than she has in months (but then, she's cried more in the past few months than in the entire first fifteen years of her life, so whatever). Dean's green eyes hold onto hers for a moment longer before she finds herself in an embrace so tight that it'd be nearly choking if she were still human.
"He doesn't get to have you," Dean says forcefully into the top of her head. "When this is over, we—you're done with him, got it?' She nods again even as she looks over at Sam through wet eyelashes. There's a whole range of emotions playing over his face and he returns her gaze helplessly.
Caroline sniffles and whispers into Dean's shirt, "What did he say to you?" He tenses but his arms stay locked around her.
"It wasn't what he said," Dean says lowly, voice still tinged with fury. "It was the way he said it, and the entitled little bastard he is. Assholes like him think that they can just take whatever they want." His arms drop and his hands go to her face. "Your problem, Care, is that you think people like Klaus can be better, that they secretly want to be better. He doesn't want you to change him—he wants to change you."
Even as she nods a third time and feels his chin on top of her crown, she can't help but think that he's wrong. Her conversations with Klaus replay in her mind—a loop of I don't know why you like me...we're nothing alike and that's exactly why I like you…beautiful, strong, and full of light. She bites her lip and meets Sam's eyes again. He doesn't look like he believes Dean all that much either.
Neither one of you is leaving the other alone.
…
The TV in the living room is blaring the morning news when Caroline settles briefly on the couch with a blood bag, her car keys tossed haphazardly on the coffee table. Castiel is watching it with rapt attention and when he notices her, he motions to the screen and asks, "Why is there no good news?"
She shrugs as she watches and says, "Bad news sells better. Honestly, the angels should just leave us to our own devices. Humanity's doing just fine destroying itself all on its own." The reporter says something about an animal attack and she shushes Castiel when he tries to speak, turning the volume up.
"…just outside the Mystic Grill," the reporter says, and Caroline's eyes narrow. "The victim was a noted member of the Mystic Falls community: the father of three, and grandfather of two. The police have advised everyone to keep aware of their surroundings…" She mutes it disgustedly and pulls her phone out, tapping on her mother's number as Castiel watches her curiously.
It rings twice before Liz answers, sounding harried, "Hey Care, I can't talk very long. Everything okay?"
Caroline gets right to the point. "Animal attack, Mom?" Liz sighs heavily into the phone and she responds quietly, "No." Before she can let out the stream of obscenities that are resting on the tip of her tongue, Liz adds sternly, "Stay away from it, Caroline. Don't get involved."
"How can you—"
Someone in the background asks for Liz's signature and she sighs into the phone, "Honey, I have to run. But for my peace of mind, leave it, okay?"
Caroline closes her eyes and screws up her face in frustration but doesn't promise anything, saying only, "Be careful, Mom. Love you," before hanging up.
Castiel is staring at her intensely. "You know who is responsible for that attack?"
She waves the now-empty blood bag at him. "Vampire. And I'm like 99% sure I know which one." Grabbing her keys and her school bag, she tosses the blood bag in the trashcan in the kitchen and is so focused on getting to her car that she nearly runs right into Castiel in the driveway.
"Who was it?" he asks, blocking her car door and crossing his arms. "One of the Original ones?" He shakes his head when she doesn't answer. "Which one, Caroline?"
"I'm going to be late for school, Cas."
He gives her that look that makes her feel like he can see right into her soul and she shrinks back a little as he says, "I don't think you were going to school."
"Yeah, well," she says, trying for sassy and falling so short. "Sounds like you have trust issues, which is kind of a personal problem, so…" and she tries to scoot around him. He doesn't even move a muscle, just watches her awkwardly attempt to get in her car with him still standing in front of the door.
"You're going to see the Original vampires," he says and she scowls, "and you can't go alone."
"I'm eighteen years old, Castiel," she points out irritably, fully aware that if she sounds this whiny to herself then he must find it gratingly childish. "I'm an adult."
"I'm older than the human race," he reminds her, and ok fine, that's pretty much a trump-all card, "and Dean and Sam would be highly upset if something happened to you." He pauses. "And so would I." She blinks at that and it requires some serious effort on her part to not melt into a warm, happy puddle at his feet; but she still shakes her head and says, "It's a bad idea, Cas." He regards her then finally moves and she frowns because she has no idea how she won this argument—but then he's waiting patiently at her passenger door and she repeats, "No way."
"I'll stay in the car."
"No!"
"If you're worried about my safety, I can assure you that vampires cannot hurt me."
"Cas—"
"Caroline."
They engage in a brief staring contest before she relents and says, pointing her finger at him, "Promise to stay in the car?" He nods gravely.
"Fine," she grouses.
…
"This house seems far too extravagant for one family," Castiel observes, eyes falling on the fountain. "And that seems entirely unnecessary."
"Tell me about it," Caroline grumbles, parking and cutting the engine. She makes no move to get out and Castiel looks over at her curiously.
"You aren't going to go in?"
"I have to work my nerve up first," she explains, eyes focused on the ornate double doors. "They're all terrifying, but Klaus…he can take it to new levels. We're talking, like, up to eleven. And I'm not exactly about to make his day." She takes a deep breath, forages around her bag for the bracelet that must have been a boomerang in a past life and slides it into her back pocket. She opens her door and says over her shoulder to Castiel, "Stay here. Unless I start screaming or something."
Castiel looks alarmed. "Is there a possibility of that?"
"You never know with him," she says darkly. "He's a moody one." Understatement of the decade.
She sets her jaw, squares her shoulders and forces herself to think of the poor man outside the Grill. She thinks of his three kids who will never see him again, and on top of that, he was a grandpa. Klaus literally killed someone's grandpa; and then there's the added horrible factor all of this awfulness being sparked by his conversation with Dean. Cold fingers of anger—or maybe fear, she can't really tell the difference right now—clench inside her abdomen as she rings the Mikaelson doorbell.
Her hand is barely back down by her side when the door swings open; and Klaus is just standing there like, oh hey it's just a normal Tuesday morning even though I murdered someone last night and it absolutely infuriates her.
He doesn't say anything, just steps aside for her to come in and as she walks inside she says acidly, "So, did you have fun last night?"
"I'm afraid I don't know to which part of my night you're referring, sweetheart," he drawls slowly, looking amused and she is possessed by the overwhelming urge to throw something at him. She can smell it on him, the scent of fresh blood clinging to him somehow; her gums ache slightly and she viciously doubles down on the craving.
"Playing dumb doesn't look good on you," she snaps. "You killed some poor kid's grandpa because, what, some conversation you had with my stepbrother pissed you off, or pushed your evil button or whatever? It's sick. Seriously, why would you do that?"
Klaus's face isn't exactly angry but he's definitely not amused anymore. "Have you forgotten what I am, Caroline? What you are? They are food, and they will only ever be food."
She scoffs and says, deliberately recalling her words from the ball, "They're just ants to you, right? Just a means to an end. Just like Jenna, just like Elena, just like Tyler," his mouth curls in distaste but she plows forward, "and just like me." She pulls the bracelet out of her back pocket and closes the distance between them.
"It's insulting how you think I can be bought," Caroline tells him disdainfully, her eyes locked with his. She takes one of his hands in her own, unfurls his fingers so that his palm is flat and drops the bracelet unceremoniously in the center before wrapping his fingers around it in a tight fist. She doesn't let go, her hands clenching hard over his. "No amount of diamonds is going to make up for the fact that you've killed people I care about for your own selfish agenda and you don't feel even the slightest bit of remorse. My God, you can't even acknowledge how you were completely prepared to sacrifice me to break your stupid hybrid curse!"
A muscle in his jaw jumps and he says through gritted teeth, "I didn't even know you." It doesn't escape her that he ignores—or refuses to hear—the first part of her declaration.
"Yeah and clearly you still don't," she retorts and his eyes flash dangerously. "Since you still assume you can buy my forgiveness with shiny jewelry and pretty dresses. But fine, we'll go with that—you didn't know me then and you wouldn't kill me now. Because seriously, Klaus, that's my whole point. You didn't know me and you don't know them. There's no difference between the two."
"Of course there is a difference," he snaps, losing his already tenuous grip on his patience and his eyes flashing. "You're eternal—you will still be here long after they have returned to dust and that makes you better."
Caroline shakes her head at him, her hands still gripping painfully tight around his fist. "No, don't you get it? That makes humans precious. Their time is so fleeting—they're here for a moment and then they're gone, but we're left behind. That doesn't make us better, Klaus, it makes us pitiful." She lets go of his hand and takes a step back, never breaking away from his gaze. "I'm so sorry that you can't see that."
Everything in his face changes but before she can bolt—before she can even blink, he's tossed the bracelet somewhere beside him and moves in front of her, his hands wrapping around her upper arms. She recognizes the look in his eyes; it's the same one that Stefan used to give Elena, like he was drowning and she'd thrown him a rope—morning after a thousand years of night. Her breath hitches and she thinks briefly that if he kisses her, then he's totally missed the point. But he doesn't.
Klaus bows his head slightly, eyes downcast towards the floor, and rests his forehead against hers. Holy mood swings, Batman, she thinks dizzily. His breath brushes against her face and he says, very quietly and almost reverently, "When this is over, go away with me. Paris, Rome, Tokyo—anywhere you want, Caroline. I'll take you."
Her heart skips a beat and warmth hums through her veins, but Caroline can't fathom how he doesn't see that trips around the world are just diamond bracelets on a grander scale. She pulls away slightly, and he lets her, but he doesn't let go of her arms. "You're doing it again," she points out exasperatedly. "Trying to buy something instead of earning it."
He's silent and those dark blue eyes could swallow her whole if she let them. "How can I acquit myself?"
She pulls away again and this time he does let her go. "I can't tell you that," she says softly. "Figuring it out is part of the process, Klaus."
He laughs shortly but it lacks humor. "And what process is that, love?"
Her head tilts and she feels a flash of sympathy for him—for the person he was a thousand years ago. "Being better," she says simply.
…
She skips school.
Castiel stares at her disapprovingly from the passenger seat but she ignores him and says, "It's just been a rough morning and I've barely been absent all year, so it's fine. And look!" She waves her phone at him. "Elena said she'll take notes for me, and she's meticulous." He shakes his head at her and frowns.
The Impala is still in the driveway when she parks on the street and Castiel scolds, "You should have gone to school," as they walk into the house. She pulls him in close by his collar and whispers urgently, "Don't tell them where we were, Cas. Promise." He looks taken aback, then nods reluctantly. She relaxes and lets him go; he mumbles something about tea and heads for the kitchen.
Sam sees her first; he has musty leather bound books in the crook of one arm and his brow furrows with concern. "What are you doing home? You feeling okay?" His free hand automatically goes to her forehead to check for a fever and she smiles a little.
"Just couldn't do it today," she tells him honestly and he grimaces in understanding.
"Yeah, last night was a doozey." He hands her the book on top of his stack. "Since you're here, you get to help research."
"Lucky me," she drawls good-naturedly, glancing at the cover of the book he's just handed her. "Looks old."
"That's because it is old," he says with a grin and Dean stumbles up behind him, rubbing his face groggily. He blinks blearily and when his gaze falls on Caroline, she bites her lip and gives him her sweetest smile.
"S'today some holiday? Columbus Day or something?" he asks, voice gravelly with sleep, and Sam answers amusedly, "Nope. Care's ditching. And Columbus Day isn't a school holiday, Dean."
"Thanks, Sam," Caroline says irritably and Dean becomes much more alert, his eyes narrowing.
"You. School. Now." He jabs his finger at the door for emphasis and she rolls her eyes.
"Dean—"
"Nope, not listening," he says over her, his hand going to her back and guiding her towards the door. "Go learn something." Sam laughs and disappears into the living room.
Caroline plants her feet firmly just short of the door and crosses her arms. "You know, for someone who played hooky for half of high school, you're being really bossy about my attendance record."
"The difference is that you're going to college," he tells her, and he flicks her nose affectionately. "You and Sammy, peas in a pod."
"One absence isn't enough to affect college," she informs him and she holds out the book Sam had handed her. "I need to feel useful, Dean. I've got to help or I might lose my mind."
Dean considers her and she puts on her best pleading face before he finally relents. "Next time you wanna be useful, Care, volunteer to make the pie runs."
…
"Hang on a second," Caroline says slowly, eyes focused on a yellowing page. Sam and Dean both look up, and Castiel glances her way. "How exactly were you planning on finding the Four Horsemen, Cas?"
He frowns and says, "I've been making careful inquiries amongst the Host and down here, but they've proven elusive. Why? Did you find something?"
She holds up the book. "They're not here, Cas. You don't find them, you summon them."
Sam leans forward and holds his hand out for the book. "Can I see that?" She passes it to him and he scans the pages.
"I don't understand," Castiel says, his expression puzzled.
"It says you have to get a proxy," Sam says slowly and Caroline nods. "It's like a locator spell," she explains. "To find someone with a locator spell, you have to use the closest you can get to their blood. So, like, if Dean went missing, Bonnie would use Sam to find him."
"Okay, but what does that have to do with a proxy?" Dean wants to know, fingers drumming on the table.
"You have to have something of theirs. But the catch is, you have to have something specific from each Horseman."
"It's a ring," Sam breaks in quietly. "You have to have a ring from each Horseman and you can only summon them separately."
"So the Host of Heaven is out looking for these rings and we have to find them first," Dean summarizes, looking over at Castiel.
"That makes sense," Castiel says thoughtfully. "It explains why no one could tell me where the Horsemen are."
"I'll put the word out," Sam says and Caroline doesn't say anything, but she does make a mental note to pass the notice along to Klaus or Elijah. Surely in a thousand years of executing their own unique brand of terror, they stumbled across someone or something that could help them find a set of rings.
…
As soon as the clock chimes 3:00, Caroline bolts from the kitchen in a pique of research-induced restlessness and calls Elena from her room.
"Yeah, I'll let Elijah know," Elena says and she must have gone straight from school to Salvatore boarding house because as soon as she says Elijah's name, Caroline hears Damon and Stefan start to argue in the background.
"Do you want me to come over there?" Caroline asks hesitantly. "Referee or something?"
Elena sighs heavily and Caroline can hear the exhaustion in her friend's voice. "Actually, I'd rather come over there, if that's okay. I can't be here anymore," and Caroline doesn't miss her pointed tone.
"Yeah," she says agreeably, "it's fine. Come on over."
Ten minutes later, Elena storms into Caroline's bedroom, dropping several choice obscenities.
"Jeez, Elena, what happened?"
Elena scowls and starts pacing in front of the bed. "I'm just so sick of Stefan and Damon trying to control my life, Care."
"So don't let them. You're the only person who controls your life, Elena, and honestly, it's past time Stefan and Damon got over themselves and remembered that."
"It's not that simple," Elena protests, but there's little conviction in her voice. Caroline rolls her eyes but before she can further argue her point, there's a brief knock on her bedroom door.
"Sorry to interrupt," Sam says, sticking his head in. "But there's a guy at the door for you, Elena."
Elena shoots Caroline a guilty look. "I called Elijah on my way over and told him to meet me here. Is that okay? I can talk to him on the porch if you don't want to invite him in."
Caroline shakes her head. "He's already been invited in." At Sam's disgruntled noise, she explains, "He told Mom he was a historian doing research on Mystic Falls before anyone knew he really was."
When they follow Sam out into the living room, Castiel is eyeing Elijah with obvious curiosity while a muscle in Dean's jaw jumps sporadically. Elijah rises politely when he sees Elena and Caroline.
"Elena, Caroline," he greets them genially and Caroline watches interestedly as Elena's face begins to turn slightly pink.
"Thanks for coming," Elena says to him warmly, and he tilts his head slightly in acknowledgement. "We need your help looking for something." She glances over at Caroline, but it's Castiel who answers.
"You are familiar with the Book of Revelation?" Caroline stifles a snort and Dean mutters, "Subtle, Cas."
Elijah looks faintly amused and says, "Of course I am. What do you need?"
Sam takes over, handing him the open book on the table. "We need to summon the Four Horsemen, but the only way to do that is to find these rings that belong to each of them." He pauses then adds, "And there's kind of a time crunch. We have to find them before the angels do."
Elijah considers them. "I'll begin right away," he says and then his eyes focus directly on Caroline. "If I may have a word in private with you?"
She blinks in surprise and Dean stiffens, saying shortly, "Not gonna happen, Lurch."
"Shut up, Dean," Caroline says, and she nods to Elijah. "I'll walk you to your car." She can feel four sets of eyes on her back as they walk outside.
He is silent as they reach his car and Caroline crosses her arms as she stops. "So what do you want to talk about?" She has a strong suspicion she knows already but she's kind of hoping she's wrong.
"It's about Niklaus," Elijah says and Caroline curses internally.
"I figured. What about him?"
He is silent for a few moments, his eyes focused on a spot just beyond her shoulder. "You came to see him today. Why?"
She shrugs awkwardly. "You should ask him about that."
"But I'm asking you," he says and Caroline suppresses a shiver. Elijah scares her in a completely different way than Klaus: dark and quietly threatening as opposed to bold and bloody displays of violence.
"He killed someone last night," she tells him softly. "After talking to Dean for two hours." She pauses. "You aren't the only ones who care about family."
Eljiah's eyes move to her face and she has to force herself to stand steady and not shrink back. "I had thought that any humanity left in Niklaus was burned away long ago. It would appear that I was mistaken."
"The man he killed was someone's grandfather, and he wasn't even sorry," Caroline says bleakly, rubbing her forehead frustratedly. "So I wouldn't be so sure."
Elijah gives her a long, unreadable look that makes Caroline shift uncomfortably. "I am quite sure," he tells her enigmatically. "Some of who he was, the brother I had a thousand years ago, remains. But I must warn you to tread carefully, Caroline. One misstep could have disastrous consequences."
She is frozen to the spot and only moves when she realizes that Elijah is gone and that his car is already down her street. Dean storms up to her, seething.
"The hell was that?" he demands and Caroline slowly shakes her head, not answering. Dean scowls and follows her as she walks back into the house.
Elena is gripping her ribcage with watery eyes when they reenter the house and Caroline smiles in sympathy. "You know what we should do?" She doesn't wait for Elena to answer. "We should have a completely normal afternoon. No Apocalypse, vampire, Original, or whatever talk. Just regular stuff like—"
"Psychotic vamp stalkers?" Dean offers with false helpfulness, eyes dark and Caroline shoots him a dirty look, retorting, "Or like how annoying siblings can be."
Elena straightens, hand falling from her ribs. "What's he talking about, Care?"
"Nothing!" Caroline insists, just as Dean says darkly, "That Original hybrid nutcase has a freaking thing for her."
Elena stares at Caroline and her brown eyes are filled with concern. "Caroline, if Klaus is—"
Caroline cuts her off by taking Elena's arm and pulling her down the hallway, tossing a glare at Dean over her shoulder. Once they are inside her room, Caroline says placatingly, "It's nothing, really." At Elena's Please, I'm not an idiot expression, she corrects herself. "He just has this like…crush on me. It's not a big deal, please don't freak out." Elena's eyes widen and she pales slightly; Caroline winces.
"Of course it's a big deal!" Elena cries, taking Caroline's hands in her own, her long brown hair swishing over Caroline's arms. "Care, he…he killed Jenna, and—and Tyler, and—"
"And you," Caroline finishes quietly, looking away. "I know. But now something seems different, Elena. Not," she rushes to add at the horrified look in Elena's eyes, "that I reciprocate in any shape, form or fashion because I definitely don't. But…" she trails off and bites her lip. "I'm doing a crap job of explaining, but trust me. Something's changed."
"Caroline," Elena says softly, taking a few steps closer. "You can't save Klaus. There is nothing left in him that is worth it, that is worth you."
Caroline gives her a tiny smile. "Dean said pretty much the exact same thing. But just for the record, I'm not trying to save anyone. I know a lost cause when I see one."
Elena tilts her head and her bottomless brown eyes hold onto Caroline's. "I hope so," she says doubtfully, and Caroline knows her best friend well enough to see that Elena doesn't believe her at all.
"We need him on our side," Caroline reminds her gently. "When everything gets back to normal, we can decide what to do about this mess."
Elena grips her hands tightly. "Promise me you'll be careful."
Caroline offers her a bright smile. "Of course."
…
"I think your demon army has arrived," Liz says over dinner, handing Dean a manila folder filled with papers. "Lots of weird things happening to people who never have weird things happen."
Caroline offers her the bowl of peas with a beam. "You have to work less, Mom. It's been so long since we all had dinner together." She turns her happy face to Dean who gives her a sarcastically wide grin back before rolling his eyes.
Liz sighs and pats Caroline's shoulder as she takes the bowl and spoons peas onto her plate. "I know, sweetie, but that's probably not going to happen anytime soon." She turns back to Dean. "You need to talk to them. Make sure they understand that as soon as this thing is over, they're out."
"They know," Sam says resignedly and Liz pins him with a look. "Then tell them they need to blend in, because right now they're doing a piss poor job of it." She gestures to the folder Dean is flipping through. "People are ignorant of what's going on, but they're not stupid. They know when their spouses, parents, or kids are acting off."
"We'll talk to them," Dean promises, passing the folder to Sam before pointing to Caroline. "No exorcising 'em. Even if they're in one of your friends."
"Wait, what?" Caroline demands. "You can't be serious—"
"Part of the deal," he says. "If it makes you feel better, they can't hop in Bonnie or Elena." At her confused glare, he explains darkly, "Witch, doppelganger. Demons can't drive supernatural cars."
"But—but Matt and Jeremy!" she protests, turning a little desperately to Sam for help. He shakes his head regretfully and she deflates. "So the entire town is going to end up possessed and fighting in the Apocalypse. Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose of protecting the town?" She narrows her eyes at Liz.
"Only the demons without meat suits are possessing people from Mystic Falls," Dean corrects her and Caroline flinches a little. "The ones already possessing people will get here soon."
"Sooner than you think," Liz says grimly. "Got a bunch of calls today about suspicious looking people snooping around. The phone was still ringing when I left."
"Great," Caroline mutters, tossing her fork down. "Just wonderful."
"Ahem." All four of them look up and Castiel is awkwardly hovering in the kitchen doorway. Caroline watches sullenly as Liz puts on her best hostess face and stands up, regarding him with interest. "You must Castiel."
He nods and then steps aside. "And this is Anna."
Sam chokes on his drink, Dean's fork drops with clatter, and Caroline stares at her.
"Hello," Anna, the angelic version of Elijah, says politely.
"Uh," Sam manages and Caroline shakes herself out of her stupor while Dean continues to gawk.
"I'm Caroline," she says, sticking her hand out in greeting. Anna stares at it and Caroline realizes that she has no idea what to do when she looks to Castiel for help; she lets her hand fall back to her side. "So you're Cas's friend?"
"She's decided to fight with us," Castiel says helpfully and Anna nods vigorously in agreement.
"Great!" Caroline says brightly and Dean recovers enough to say, "The more the merrier. Any chance there's more on the way?"
"That has yet to be determined," Castiel says gravely and Anna adds, "Michael is very convincing in his arguments for the destruction of humanity."
Dean physically recoils at the name Michael and fear spikes through Caroline's heart—I'm supposed to fight with the angels. Something snaps inside of her and she's done being kept in the dark about this. She stands and pulls Dean up with her, saying with exaggerated cheerfulness to Cas and Anna, "So nice to meet you, but I—I'm having boy problems and I really need Dean's advice, so if you'll excuse us—"
"What the hell, Care?" Dean says but there's no bite to it as she yanks him into her room and shuts the door firmly. "When you say boy problems, you better mean Tyler Lockwood problems."
She ignores him and says accusingly, "You have yet to explain what you meant when you first came back—about the angels thinking you're on their side. Start talking."
He tenses and her stomach rolls. "Dean, if you don't tell me, I'm going to imagine the worst. Just tell me what's going on."
"Care—"
"Dean, please."
He sighs and falls back onto her bed, staring up at the ceiling, hands crossed over his stomach. She lies down next to him, her legs dangling off the edge, and waits.
"The angels didn't gank me out of Hell from the goodness of their hearts," he says carefully. Caroline keeps her gaze focused on her ceiling. "Here's the thing. The person you see when you look at Cas—that's not the real Castiel. It's the guy he's…." Dean shrugs one shoulder. "It's possession but it's different than the demonic kind." Caroline starts to interrupt and he holds up his hand to stop her. "They have to have the person's permission."
"What does that have to do with you?"
"Angels can't stay very long on earth in their real form," he tells her. "They all need a vessel—a person to stay in. But Michael…he's an archangel."
"How is does that make him different from Cas?"
Dean turns his head towards her. "He's seen God," he says quietly and Caroline sits up immediately.
"What?"
Dean sits up as well. "Not in a long time, according to Cas, but yeah. The four archangels have all seen God. They're like the head honchos—the five-star generals. So when they take a vessel, it's different from when an angel like Cas does." He stares straight ahead at the collection of pictures tacked to Caroline's wall over her desk. "They have to have a specific person because normal vessels can't deal with it."
"So…so you just don't give him permission to like, take over your brain and that's it!" she exclaims, grabbing one of his hands. "If he can't fight—"
"Care," Dean says reservedly. "They have very powerful methods of persuasion." The words barely register with her; in her mind she sees the battle as already halfway won because no way Dean lets some ball of light mind zap him.
"So you just hold your ground," she replies, as though it's the easiest, most obvious thing in the world and Dean shakes his head.
"You're not hearing me, Caroline," he tells her firmly, taking her face in his hands, green eyes boring into hers. "Listen to me. The first—and only—time they've approached me, they gave me super advanced stomach cancer and took away Sam's freaking lungs."
All the blood in her face drains away and her hands shake as they circle Dean's wrists. "W—what? They can…they can do that?"
"Tip of the iceberg on what they can do."
She stares at him. "Why haven't they tried anything recently?"
"Don't know for sure. Cas thinks it has something to do with all the weird crap in Mystic Falls—vamps, witches, werewolves, the works. And now I've got my angelic Invisibility Cloak, so." He shrugs.
Caroline gnaws on the inside of her cheek before offering hesitantly, "I—I'm not saying I want this to happen, or even that it's a good idea, but…but if having you is their key to winning…" Coward, she chastises herself. Can't even say it.
"Don't even think about it," he says firmly and she flushes.
"Dean—"
His hands clasp her shoulders, his tone final. "I'm not becoming a vampire, Caroline."
"I don't want you to become one either, Dean, but what if it's the only way to stop the Apocalypse?"
Anger, fear, love, and a myriad of other emotions war for domination of his face and she swallows the lump in her throat. "Care," he says quietly, his fingers going to her chin. "Being a vampire doesn't automatically mean you have to bat for Team Evil. You know that—hell, you're proof of that."
She struggles to speak around the iron claws digging into her throat. "But then why? Don't you—" she hiccups and his grip on her shoulders tightens. "Don't you want to stay with me? Because I'll have to lose you—you and Sam, and I c-can't—"
Dean silences her by pulling her into his chest and she thinks to herself that this exact scene, her crying messily into his shirt, has happened way too many times recently.
"It's not that, Care. It's nothing like that," he assures her, his voice gravelly and her control on her tears wavers. "It's just...I'm still holding out hope that when I get to where I'm going, that…you know, my mom will be there. And I'd rather not put that off longer than necessary."
That sends her straight over the edge into sobbing and in her mind she remembers an old Winchester family portrait that John had squirreled away (but that a thirteen year old rebellious Sam had shown her): Mary Winchester with a tiny Dean on her lap, staring up adoringly at her; and a baby Sam in the crook of her elbow, one of his fat fists gripping a thick piece of blonde hair. Caroline's shoulders shake and her nose drips while tears streak down her face. "But I'll never see you again," she manages to force out between desperate gasps for air that she doesn't actually need. She doesn't care that she's being selfish, doesn't care that she's actually channeling Klaus right now because if there were a way she could guarantee Sam and Dean's safety for eternity she'd do it, consequences be damned.
"Of course you will," he tells her firmly and he sounds so sure of himself that her hysterics slow, her breath coming in more evenly. "You'll stick around here for a while, check out the flying cars and what life on the moon is like, but then you'll realize that no one thinks your Jetsons jokes are funny. Then you'll decide you'd rather be with me and Sammy, because we always laugh at your jokes, no matter how dumb, and that'll be it."
She doesn't say anything, just wipes her face with his shirt, ignoring his affronted noise. As her breathing slows and her heart calms down, he says affectionately, "I would say you owe me a new shirt, but I'll let it go this one time. Just because I love you."
…
After telling Dean she's exhausted (true) and that she is going straight to bed (not true), Caroline listens closely at her door to make sure the group in the living room is completely focused on their own conversation before slowly opening her window. At every squeak, she winces and freezes, listening hard for pauses, but none are forthcoming, so she continues until her window is fully opened. Checking one last time for suspicions in the living room and hearing nothing, she slips outside and runs into the woods.
She's not really hungry, and squirrels and bunnies don't exactly taste good, but she needs the distraction—needs to escape her own head, really. The forest is quiet except for the small scratching and squeaks of the very things she's hunting.
Her concentration is so focused on one pesky squirrel that she doesn't notice the cracking of twigs and leaves behind her; she nearly jumps out of her skin when Stefan Salvatore says, "Hey."
She whirls around, one hand clasped to her chest. "God, Stefan! Don't do that!"
He looks annoyingly amused, eyes laughing at her. "Sorry. What are you doing out here? I thought you were exclusively on blood bags."
She shrugs and turns back to the now entirely silent woods; Stefan must have scared the animals into hiding. "Needed to clear my head." At his questioning look, she clarifies only slightly, "Lots of stuff going on."
"Oh," he says and she tries to ignore the curiosity in his voice. "Want to talk about it?"
Caroline eyes him suspiciously, searching his face. "Are you really back to being you?"
He gives her a half-hearted smile. "Trying to be."
She considers him before finally relenting. "You can't tell anyone, especially not Elena. Or Damon. Or Bonnie. Or—"
"I know what anyone means," he breaks in with a small laugh. "What's up?"
She sighs heavily and turns her back to him; she really doesn't want to see his expression post-confession. "Klaus has a crush on me and I'm not totally disgusted by it."
When she peeks back to gauge Stefan's reaction, his thoughtful expression takes her a little by surprise.
"You're not freaking out?" she asks, eyebrows knitting together in confusion and Stefan gives her this mysterious little smile. Her curiosity is immediately piqued. "What do you know that I don't?"
"I knew Klaus before all of this," he says nonchalantly and she blinks in surprise, because what? "In the twenties."
"Was he the same as he is now?"
Stefan's eyes lose their focus and he says slowly, "Yes and no. Yeah, he was still crazy, but…we were real friends, Caroline. Brothers."
She inches closer to him. "Were you…you know, crazy Ripper Stefan?"
He laughs humorlessly. "Yeah. But I never flipped the switch." Caroline refrains from reminding him that that makes all of it so much worse and he goes on, "There was enough feeling left in him—enough humanity, I guess, to have real friendship."
"I don't think he wants me to just be his friend," Caroline says quietly, looking down at her shoes; they scuff against each other as she shifts her weight from foot to foot.
"What do you want?"
Avoiding his gaze, she looks up to the black sky, at the stars winking over them, and says unhappily, "For none of this to be real."
"I hate to be the one to tell you this, but that's not an option," he remarks dryly.
"I know," she whispers, eyes locked contemplatively on the North Star; and a fourteen year old Sam whispers in her head, You're never lost if you can find the North Star, Caroline. "I don't know what I want, and that's not okay, Stefan, because it should be easy. I don't hate him, and that's the problem because I should hate him, after everything's he's done to us!" She gestures at him. "Case in point."
Stefan gives her a sad, understanding smile. "You can't help how you feel, Care. It's part of what keeps you human. And after you've been a vampire for a while, you start to realize that everyone has skeletons in their closets."
She shakes her head and says fiercely, "No, I get that. But Klaus has been around for a thousand years, Stefan. If he killed only one person for every year he's been alive—or undead, or whatever—that's a thousand people. You and I both know that's the absolute smallest number possible and the real one is probably miles away from that."
"It is a lot of people," he agrees softly, gaze never wavering from her face. "But you haven't answered my question. What do you want? Not what you think you should want, or what Elena and Bonnie expect you to want," he adds as she opens her mouth. "What does Caroline Forbes want?"
She swallows hard and whispers, "I don't know, and that's the problem. What does that say about me if I can't even resist a mass murderer?"
"Elena couldn't either," Stefan reminds her gently, a flicker of shame dancing across his face. "Don't be too hard on yourself." He takes both of her hands in his and says kindly, "Whatever you decide, Caroline, I'll be there. Regardless of the fallout."
She nods jerkily. "Promise?"
He smiles down at her. "What are best friends for?"
…
Caroline is slipping quickly and silently down the back streets that lead to her house when she sees Matt standing in his front yard, still as a stone and staring up at the sky. Dread creeps through her and she approaches him cautiously.
"Hey, Matt," she calls out quietly and he turns his head slowly to look at her, his face blank. "Everything okay?"
He stares at her until she starts to fidget nervously and she repeats, "Matt, are you okay?"
"You are a fool, Caroline," he says flatly and she sees red, the dread twisting into anger.
"Get out of my friend, asshole," she hisses, grabbing his collar and ignoring Dean's orders to overlook any of her friends' possible demonic possession. "Find someone else to play puppet master with."
His face doesn't change at all; he doesn't even flinch. "You are a fool," he says again, "for fighting on the wrong side."
Her entire body goes ice cold and she lets go of him, backing up. "W-what?"
Matt looks up to the sky and says, "The Host of Heaven will not stop, will not rest, until there is nothing left of this place. You are fighting a losing battle."
She takes another step back. "Matt—Matt, this isn't funny."
He doesn't look at her. "This is a war the Winchesters will not win," he says emotionlessly, and when he finally turns towards her, she nearly passes out as dark black wings shadow out behind him.
…
tbc.
A/N: Cliffhanger! All feedback (positive, negative, or 'meh') is welcome and greatly appreciated. If you Favorite or Story Alert, please consider reviewing as well. ~xo