Chapter Six: Friendship

Lapis again manages to regain her composure before touching down on her doorstep in front of Jasper and unlocking the door with her hydrokinesis. As before she holds the door for Jasper to enter ahead of her and ushers Jasper into the living room, but she doesn't make the silly mistake of offering Jasper refreshments. She once again offers Jasper a seat and Jasper takes her up on that offer, and Lapis turns the other chair so she can sit facing her like last time.

Jasper briefly glances at the wall that she broke two evenings ago, and even though there's no longer any trace of the damage, she turns to Lapis and says sincerely, "you know, I'm also sorry I put a hole in your wall. That was weak of me, too."

Lapis smiles at Jasper and says: "Oh that's okay Jasper, I was never upset with you over that and Bismuth was able to fix it in just a few minutes! She was actually really impressed by the hole you made, she said she made my walls from the same stuff as the Diamond Palaces and that your power is incredible to be able to break my wall without using your helmet. But I'm so happy, Jasper, that you finally realize that such power isn't the same thing as true strength. I'm really proud of you, this is such a huge breakthrough! I can't help wondering, how did you manage to figure that out so quickly? Was it just from thinking about the stuff I told you, or was there something else?"

Jasper looks at Lapis with a very serious expression and she says, "in the forest near my training grounds I met a bird, and she was stronger than me. Despite being puny and fragile, that bird was a greater warrior than I ever was. She proved to me that your words the other night were the truth."

Lapis looks happy, but also quite surprised and a little bit confused upon hearing this, and asks Jasper: "Uh... what... you met... a bird? And she was stronger than you? What happened, exactly?"

Jasper answers: "In a moment of weakness while thinking about your words, I gave in to my rage and destroyed a tree, and some kind of basket thing full of tiny birds that must've been in the tree fell down and I caught it out of reflex. I realized that destroying the tree was something that Steven would frown upon, but before I could think much about that, the small birds' mother began attacking me in order to protect them from the threat-entity who destroyed their tree."

"I was confused at first thinking about how pointless her actions were since she knew she had no chance of defeating me, but then it struck me that the pointlessness of her actions was the point. She was just like Steven and the Crystal Gems when I first met them: Even when faced with an enemy she had no chance of defeating, she stood her ground to protect what she cares about, and would have persevered to the very end no matter what I did to her. I realized that the bird is strong, that unlike me she is a true warrior who fights for the sake of others rather than simply following orders or fighting for the sake of false pride."

Lapis' smile grows as Jasper tells her story, and she wipes a few tears of joy from her eyes before replying: "Oh Jasper, that's a beautiful story! The way you had an epiphany like that and learned humility, it's like something out of a storybook, I'm deeply moved by it. Just to let you know, those tiny birds are called 'baby' birds, as very young and small animals are called 'babies' or 'infants,' until they grow into 'juveniles' before eventually becoming full-grown 'adults.' That 'basket' in which you found them is called a 'nest,' it's something that adult birds build in order to house their babies until they're old enough to fend for themselves and fly away." A question suddenly pops into her mind, and she asks, "so what happened to the birds, what did you do with the nest?"

Jasper says, "I already knew what 'juveniles' and 'adults' are because Steven once explained to me that he and Connie are juveniles who haven't yet grown into adults. But thank you for explaining the concept of 'babies' or 'infants' to me. As for the nest... I placed it up high in another tree and did my best to make sure it was locked in place. Because she proved stronger than me, I conceded defeat to the mother bird and secured her babies for her."

Lapis wipes a few more tears of joy from her eyes before she says: "Oh Jasper, that's amazing! You did a very good thing, you know. You destroyed the birds' original home, but you atoned for that action by helping them move to a new home. That was strength, you know; it was very strong of you to admit defeat and help that bird protect her family after realizing you were in the wrong. Your actions in that case were much like what the Diamonds are doing now you know, just on a much smaller scale."

It's now Jasper's turn to smile, and she asks Lapis, "really Lapis? That was... strong of me? I'm glad that I finally did something strong for once, but I'm a bit confused as it seems there are many different things that can be considered strong. Can you explain how I was strong?"

Lapis now looks deeply contemplative as she carefully considers Jasper's words; after a few seconds of thought, she answers: "Well Jasper, you're right, there are many ways to be strong. As I told you before, patience and restraint are strength. As the bird taught you, the selfless desire to protect others and the courage and resolve to stand one's ground against all odds are also forms of strength. Steven and the three original Crystal Gems were always very strong in those ways."

"But you're right Jasper, there are many other forms that strength can take! Humility is a form of strength, and so are atonement and repentance. It can be very hard for anyone to admit to things like being in the wrong or showing weakness. But you've now demonstrated those forms of strength, Jasper. You humbly admitted your own weakness and conceded defeat to that bird, you realized that destroying the tree was wrong, and you atoned for your wrongdoing by helping the creatures you hurt just as the Diamonds now plan to spend eons doing. That's how you were strong. And I'm very, very proud of you."

Lapis gives two thumbs up and shoots Jasper that smile again, the toothy ear-to-ear grin, and Jasper finds herself getting that strange tingly feeling once again. But now on top of that feeling there are others Jasper can actually identify: She feels a sense of acceptance and belonging. Lapis approves of her, she's proud of her, and believes her to be strong. Jasper swells with a feeling of happiness and pride greater than any she's ever felt or ever imagined she would feel; even if only for a moment, she's forgotten about her insecurities.

Jasper blushes, and her face also lights up in a smile; it's a crooked, slightly embarrassed looking but very happy smile, and she glances a bit to the side rather than directly at Lapis and fiddles with the ends of her hair. Unable to make eye contact at the moment, she says to Lapis: "Thank you Lapis, that... it means so much to me coming from you." Her blush subsides and she looks at Lapis again as she continue: "Before I get to the questions that will help me accomplish my current mission-objectives, I have one more question about strength. What are other forms that strength can take?"

Lapis looks thoughtful again, and thinks for a few seconds before responding: "Hmmm, well Jasper, that's a very broad question. I can at least tell you what some of the other forms of strength are, though. First of all, I oversimplified things when I told you that combat prowess is never a form of strength. Placing value on your ability to fight can be a form of weakness or of strength. What matters are the motives behind why someone wants to fight, and also that they try their best to only use fighting as a last resort once words and diplomacy have failed. That last part is something that Steven taught me, that he taught all of us. He's a very powerful fighter, but with Connie's help he ended the tyranny of Era 2 by talking to the Diamonds rather than fighting them."

"When it comes to having good motivations for engaging in combat, Steven and Connie are good examples; they trained and became better fighters over the years so they could protect their home and their loved ones. The reason why your pursuit of battle was always a weakness is because of what you said before: You were only motivated by selfish pride and the desire to blindly follow orders. One last thing to note about being truly strong as a warrior is that it requires courage. You were always arrogant in battle, you believed yourself to be superior and couldn't see any possibility that you might lose. But what takes true strength is to do what that bird did, to have the courage to stand up to an opponent who has you outmatched, like I and the Crystal Gems did when we fought Blue Diamond and Yellow Diamond. Jasper, facing off against the Diamonds was terrifying; I really wanted to just run away. But I forced myself to stand my ground because I knew my friends needed me."

"Aside from the desire to fight others, the desire to train to improve your physical skills can be a form of strength rather than weakness depending on your motivations. You showed weakness by training for two years because you were motivated by nothing but pointless aggression and the desire to follow orders once you found a new superior. But wanting to improve your fighting abilities isn't in and of itself a bad thing, and there's nothing wrong with taking pride in your abilities as a warrior as long as your motivations are the right ones."

"I haven't told anyone about this before, but even though I was already the 'Ultimate Lapis Lazuli,' I trained my hydrokinesis to become even stronger during those two years. A couple years ago, with effort I was able to physically restrain Blue Diamond, but she easily broke free with her Diamond Aura. I was worried for a while, although I'm not anymore, that the Diamonds would revert to their old ways. So I trained not for the sake of aggression or selfish pride, but so that I could protect my friends if necessary. And my training paid off! When Steven turned into a giant monster with physical power far surpassing the other Diamonds and went on a mindless rampage, with tremendous effort I was able to restrain him for some time and keep him from doing anything terrible that he'd always regret. Steven later thanked me for stopping him, and I'm very proud that I was able to use my immense power to help him and protect my friends."

"Jasper, you're an incredible fighter; according to Bismuth when she saw the hole you made, you're probably more physically powerful than any non-fusion Gem in existence besides true Garnets, Emeralds, and the Diamonds. There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking pride in that as long as your motivations are the right ones. It's fine if you want to train and hone your skills, as long as you do so either purely for the sake of self-improvement or so you can help and protect others."

Jasper does look a bit proud upon being told what Bismuth said, and Lapis continues: "I told you before that fighting isn't strength, but now you see it's not quite that simple; I was simply telling you what you needed to hear at the time in order to break you free from the shackles of your outdated views. Do you understand why I omitted the more complex truth, Jasper?"

Jasper replies: "Yes, I see now. Fighting is only the right response once empathy fails and diplomacy breaks down. Steven did teach us that, it was one of the biggest lessons he always tried to teach to everyone. And I see what you mean that whether training and fighting is strength or weakness depends on a person's motivations. But the truth is so complicated that you couldn't really explain it to me last time, so I understand why you told me that fighting is never strength. I will always take pride in my power and skills, but in the future I will try my best to not focus on aggression but rather on self-improvement. I suppose that even the idea of fighting to protect others out of empathy rather than a sense of duty does sound... nice, now that I think about it. It did feel nice when I used my superior size and power to atone for destroying that tree by helping those birds secure their nest in a different tree."

Jasper seems to have a sudden epiphany and pounds her right fist into her left palm in a very Peridot-like fashion as she then says: "Of course, it finally makes sense, that's what the fusion calling herself Garnet meant when she fought me on the ship. She sang a song that I thought it was only meant to taunt me, but now I realize what it meant. She said that she wouldn't let me hurt her planet or her friends, that she's made of love which is stronger than me. I thought that was nonsense, because I was winning the fight. But I see now how she was stronger: She was fighting to protect what she cares about, so her resolve and courage were far stronger than mine. Because of that she kept calmer than me and used better tactics, and she defeated me using our surroundings despite being physically outmatched. Even singing that song was a way in which she was stronger than me, it was a brilliant tactic to make me lose my composure and leave openings."

"And now that I think back on that, I can see that when it comes to battle, there are forms of strength aside from actual combat ability itself. I always thought that sheer power and skill were everything in battle, but I suppose I was truly a fool to believe that. I see now that keeping a cool head and using tactics can prove to be stronger than the use of mere power. I don't know why I didn't see that sooner; I always gave in to my emotions and let them control me during battle, never considering that tactics can be a form of strength far surpassing power, and I somehow refused to see that even when someone actually proved it to me by defeating me."

Lapis briefly thinks, "so Bismuth was right, Jasper had Garnet physically outmatched and there was a 'catch' to how Garnet won," and smiles as she replies: "Yes, exactly! I'm so glad you understand, Jasper. Fighting and training can be weakness or strength depending on motives and whether you see fighting as an immediate answer to problems or as a last resort. And you're right, in battle tactics can prove to be a much greater form of strength than power. Garnet was strong when she fought you, but you were weak when you fought her, and that's why you lost. So with that cleared up, since you brought up Garnet whose existence as a fusion you always regarded as disgusting, for now I'll tell you about one more form of strength, a way of being a good person: Acceptance."

A more serious look crosses Lapis' face as she continues: "As long as they aren't hurting anyone by being who they are, it's immoral and weak to feel or show prejudice against others for differences in their appearance, abilities, the way they choose to live, or other traits. Accepting and respecting people for who they are is a way of being strong that the Crystal Gems, and Steven especially, have always excelled at. Do you understand?"

Jasper ponders this for almost twenty seconds, and then a look of guilt crosses her countenance as she averts her eyes from Lapis' face once again and answers in a voice full of shame: "I... I see now. Yes. I was always... I was always incredibly weak, incredibly bad in that way. Gem society itself was bad, now that you put things this way I can see that, and I guess that's the whole point of the changes in Era 3. Until recently, the Diamonds taught us to reject and hurt those who didn't fit into their hierarchy or rules. But I suppose that was weak and wrong. Steven taught the Diamonds that they should let everyone be who they are, as long as they don't hurt anyone like you said. I... I feel so ashamed. I think I need to... I need to apologize, to many people."

Lapis shows a sad look of understanding and compassion on her face; she knows what it's like to feel guilt upon realizing the magnitude of one's wrongdoings. Jasper sighs and makes eye contact with Lapis again, and then says: "I need to apologize to Garnet for calling her a 'shameless display,' for resenting and insulting the very nature of her existence, and for how I refused to accept that she calls herself a Garnet. There are even bigger things I need to apologize to Steven for, but I need to apologize to him as well for how it took me so long to first accept that he wasn't his mother, and then my later failure to accept his existence as a hybrid and the one possessing Pink Diamond's gemstone."

Jasper looks to be on the verge of tears now, but she continues as she feels compelled to confess her sins to Lapis: "There are many others who I've shown prejudice against and refused to accept, but the... the one I feel most guilty about is that Amethyst from the Crystal Gems. With you explaining that prejudice based on appearance or abilities is wrong, I realize that I... I was horrible to Amethyst. I called her a 'runt,' I called her 'defective,' and I called her... I called her 'weak.' It was one thing for me to physically dominate her when I fought her, but I should never have called her weak, she's the one who fought for the sake of her home and the other Crystal Gems while I fought for... what was I even fighting for at that point?"g

Jasper sighs before continuing: "I'd already committed a taboo in the eyes of Era 2 society, the Diamonds would've shattered me for fusing with a Gem of another type. I no longer had a mission from the Diamonds when I fought Amethyst, I would've been a fugitive myself if they'd realized what I did with you and I was only fighting to cover up my own weakness. I was driven by nothing but insecurity and false pride. And yet I was so cruel to Amethyst, I was cruel because due to her appearance, her short stature as a result of being overcooked, I falsely saw her as everything I was afraid that I myself might have been: Weak, useless, wrong. She was strong, she fought for others, but I called her weak, I insulted her over and over, and when I poofed her I planned to shatter her when she was defenseless."

Jasper now has tears leaking from her eyes and streaming down her face, and looks immensely guilty as she forces herself to keep looking at Lapis and continue: "There's no excuse for how I acted. I don't know how... Lapis, I know I need to, but how can I ever apologize to Amethyst for how weak and terrible I was, for how I took out all my own repressed insecurities, denial, and negativity on her, for how I tried to shatter her just so I could feel powerful and in control? She didn't... she didn't deserve that, Lapis. How can I apologize to her when what I did was unforgivable, how can I ever expect her forgiveness?"

It's clear that Jasper has finished; Lapis stands up and takes a few steps forward. Due to Jasper's immense stature, Lapis' face is on the same level as Jasper's while the latter remains sitting. With a few tears in her own eyes, Lapis looks directly into Jasper's eyes as she places her left hand comfortingly on Jasper's right shoulder, and says in a soft voice: "Jasper, I did the same kind of thing to you as you did to Amethyst, I took out all my negativity on you and used you as a punching bag so I could feel powerful by making you feel insignificant And if you were able to forgive me before you even learned true strength, then I know that Amethyst will forgive you. She's laid-back, strong, and a wonderful person, Jasper. She's gotten over her own insecurities, and knowing her she's probably already forgiven you and doesn't even think anymore about how she felt when you hurt her. It's true that you can never expect forgiveness from anyone, but someone like Amethyst will forgive you."

"The hard part, Jasper, will be working up the courage to apologize to Amethyst and admit to her, as you did to me, how and why you know all your actions towards her were wrong. I know that can be difficult to do when you've wronged someone in such a way. It took all my courage to admit to you two nights ago the real reasons why I'd been avoiding you and how guilty I felt around you, and you know that once I was alone with you I nearly had a breakdown. It can take a lot of strength to admit to one's own sins. But I believe in you Jasper. I have faith that you have the strength and courage to apologize to Amethyst, and to everyone else you've wronged as well."

Jasper has stopped crying, and her eyes glisten with her churning emotions as Lapis looks her in the eyes and continues: "And I realize now that I myself, I... I forgot to actually apologize to you, Jasper. I admitted that I did wrong, but I didn't actually apologize. Jasper, I'm so sorry for the way I hurt you. I told you a couple years ago that the way I was when we were Malachite, it was unhealthy. It was so wrong. The Crystal Gems could have just defeated you there on that Beach, you were weakened from the crash and they had you outnumbered. I always tried to justify things, to others and to myself, by saying that I needed to protect Steven by imprisoning you. But the truth is that deep down I knew it was completely unnecessary. The only real reason I fused with you was so I could make someone I disliked at the time feel trapped and imprisoned like I once did in that awful mirror. But then I... I... I tortured you Jasper, for so much of the time we were fused. I'm so sorry."

Jasper chooses to emulate Lapis' gesture of comfort from earlier; she reaches up with her left hand to lift Lapis' hand from her right shoulder, and then takes both hands and firmly clasps Lapis' hand between her own in front of Lapis' chest. She then says: "Lapis, I told you, I forgive you for everything. I knew that the Crystal Gems could've defeated me after the crash, that's why I wanted to fuse with you, so I could be powerful enough to beat them. So I already knew that you only fused with me to imprison me so you could take out your rage on me. But I don't judge you for it. How could I, of all Gems, ever judge someone for taking out their issues on other people, when that's what I always did? Lapis, I don't hold anything against you, and I'm grateful to you. You told me that you have faith in my strength, that I can have the courage to apologize to the people who I hurt. Your faith... it means everything to me, Lapis. Thank you."

Jasper squeezes Lapis' hand a bit harder and continues: "You know Lapis, you're wrong about your own strength. You told me the other night that you're weak, but you aren't weak at all. I have no real excuse for my weaknesses other than how I've always been... insecure. But like you said, nobody's perfect, and in your case your weaknesses are due to the bad things that happened to you, the thousands of years you spent trapped. You're... traumatized. But just because you have issues where you sometimes lose control of yourself because of how hurt you are, that doesn't make you weak. You're strong Lapis, very strong, in the ways that really matter. I admire you Lapis, I look up to you and hope I can one day be as strong as you are."

Lapis blushes heavily when Jasper tells her all this; she herself has deep insecurities, so just like Jasper she's always sought approval and validation. To be told that the person she once hurt the most now admires and looks up to her, to be told by that person that she's strong, fills her with strange feelings.

She suddenly finds herself very aware of Jasper's hands clasped around her left hand; she knows she's more powerful than Jasper, but that's only with water. Physically Lapis is like other Gems of her type, meaning her body is weak and fragile compared to soldier-type Gems like Quartzes, and she's especially fragile compared to the power of "The Ultimate Quartz." Lapis notices how very large Jasper's hands are as they completely engulf her own hand, and how powerful those hands feel; Jasper has a firm but gentle grip, and Lapis knows that if Jasper strengthened that grip to just a tiny fraction of her true power, her own tiny hand would be destroyed.

Lapis is normally very paranoid; her paranoia was why she chose to flee Earth rather than face the Diamonds' wrath (although she did work up the courage to return and help her friends), and it's why she had Bismuth build her home with a security system. And that paranoia is at least somewhat justified: After all, since Lapis is so fragile, some Crystal Gem soldier (neither Lapis nor Bismuth realize it was actually Bismuth herself) was able to easily poof her during the War when she was caught unawares. Without her power over water, Lapis is vulnerable; given the horrible trauma she was put through due to that physical vulnerability, she's always paranoid that someone may poof her physical form and imprison her before she can regenerate.

And yet, to her own surprise she finds that she doesn't fear Jasper at all right now; she knows that now that she has a hold of her, Jasper potentially has the advantage and the control in this situation, and could likely poof her in a mere moment if she wished. But despite how Jasper could harm her, Lapis knows that she won't do so; she trusts Jasper absolutely and completely. She's now acutely aware of Jasper's large frame, of how the arms attached to the hands holding her own are so thick, of how the shoulders and torso those arms are attached to are so broad, and of how Jasper is so tall that she's at her eye level despite how she sits while Lapis stands.

Lapis is once again reminded of Bismuth's words: "Jasper sure is a brawny one." Jasper is learning to be strong in the real way, she's learning to be kind, and Lapis finds that as a result, Jasper's incredible physical strength now makes her feel safe. She feels secure and protected with Jasper holding her hand like this. Lapis' blush deepens as she's mortified to find that her thoughts turn in a new direction; she wants more. She wants to be closer to Jasper, to curl up in her lap so Jasper can wrap those big, powerful arms around her to make her feel safe and protected from a universe that often seems so terrifying. Looking into Jasper's eyes, she sees them glistening with admiration and respect while Jasper's expression shows nothing but sincerity, and Lapis knows she's right: Jasper would protect her if the need arose. Lapis blushes even harder.

All those thoughts pass through Lapis' mind in a matter of seconds. Lapis isn't just mortified anymore, she's outright terrified by the direction in which her thoughts are heading. She averts her eyes from Jasper's face and abruptly pulls her hand back as if from a live wire, and Jasper allows her to do so by relinquishing her grip. Jasper's expression shifts from respectful, admiring, and sincere, to extremely confused. "Why did she suddenly pull away like that," Jasper wonders, "is she... afraid of me?" The thought that Lapis might fear her causes Jasper to feel a sharp pang of hurt, a sensation far worse than any of the tortures that Lapis inflicted upon her when they were Malachite, a sensation that feels as bad or worse than it felt to become corrupted. Jasper has no way to know that the reason why Lapis pulled away isn't because she fears her, but because Jasper makes her feel safe.

Jasper's pain shows clearly on her face, and even though Lapis has her eyes averted, she knows that Jasper must be confused, that she probably hurt her feelings by pulling away like that. Knowing that she needs to clear things up, it only takes Lapis a moment to force her blush to subside and to turn her eyes back to Jasper's.

Before Jasper can voice her confusion, Lapis tells her: "Don't worry Jasper, I'm not... there's nothing wrong, you didn't do anything wrong, I trust you." Jasper's tense expression relaxes into one of immense relief as Lapis continues with a lame excuse that's as much to convince herself as it is for Jasper: "I just... because of my issues I... sometimes I'm weird about physical contact, I go back and forth on whether I'm comfortable with it. It's not your fault, you really did nothing wrong." Jasper seems to believe Lapis' explanation, and Lapis forces herself to believe it as well.

Lapis takes a breath and fully composes herself before continuing: "I really appreciate what you told me just now, Jasper. No one's ever admired me before, or at least no one's ever told me that they did. I want to believe that you're right, that I'm strong." She sighs as her expression becomes sorrowful, and she says: "But I'm not sure if I can believe it. As recently as a few months ago, there was an incident where I lost control and showed my weakness, where I nearly shattered a pair of other Lapis Lazulis before Steven brought me back to my senses. I don't know if I really have gotten any better since we were Malachite. I don't want to... disappoint you, Jasper, I don't want to let you down. Maybe you should find a better role model than a screw-up loose cannon like me."

Jasper looks upset, and she loudly voices her displeasure: "That's NONSENSE Lapis, I don't want to hear you talk about yourself that way EVER again! So WHAT if you lost control again a few months ago?! You said you have faith in me, right? Well I have faith in you, Lapis, and if you lost control again I'm sure there was a reason for it, something to do with your trauma or whatever."

Jasper takes a calming breath before continuing in a quieter tone: "I know you've gotten much better since we were Malachite, because not too long after we un-fused you rejected my offer to fuse again. I offered to once again be your 'punching bag' as you called it, and you declined because even after such a short time you'd already become a stronger, better person. It's been a couple years and you've changed even more since then, so do NOT doubt that you've gotten better! I already told you, Lapis: I absolutely hate seeing you look sad and pathetic, because strong and fierce suits you much better. But now I'll add to that by saying that happiness suits you well, too. I hate seeing you frown, I'd much rather see you smile."

This seems to do the trick, as Lapis once again shoots her that big, toothy grin that gives Jasper such a strange soaring feeling, and wipes a few tears of joy from the corners of her eyes. Jasper smiles herself and says to Lapis, "there it is Lapis, there's that smile I like to see," but she doesn't tell Lapis about how making that smile appear is one of her Mission Objectives. Lapis giggles a little before saying, "thank you Jasper, you're right, I should try not to doubt myself. Once again, I really appreciate your kind words." She then goes and sits back down in her chair across from Jasper.

The thought of her Mission Objectives brings Jasper's mind back around to the main reasons she came here tonight. Jasper greatly appreciates Lapis' further explanation of the various forms of true strength, as it helped her reach some new epiphanies. But she originally came here so she could accomplish her Second Objective, to apologize to Lapis as she's now done, and then to get her help contacting Steven so she can apologize to him too. Jasper has now appended that objective with the need to apologize to several other people, especially Amethyst. But she also came here to accomplish her Third Objective, to learn about "friendship." Jasper doesn't want to just apologize to Her Diamond, she wants to offer him her friendship as well, and because of that she needs to accomplish her Third Objective, to gain an understanding of the concept of friendship, before she can talk to Steven.

Jasper's usual demeanor of confident swagger has returned in spades. She sits with her arms crossed over her chest and her head held high as she gazes as Lapis, and says in a gruff tone: "Lapis, I have further questions for you. I plan to accomplish my new Mission Objectives but I can't do so without certain information and help that I know you can provide."

Lapis has to suppress her laughter so that Jasper won't mistakenly think she isn't taking her seriously; she can't help but find it funny how even now as she becomes a better, stronger person, Jasper maintains a soldier-like militaristic attitude involving "mission objectives" when it comes to bettering herself. "It's kinda cute," Lapis thinks, "like those adorable little post-corruption horns on her hea... wait, WHAT?" She once again crushes her wayward thoughts beneath a wall of denial as if she were crushing an enemy beneath a wall of water, and yet she finds it increasingly difficult to suppress and deny her thoughts. For now at least, she still barely manages.

Lapis replies: "Of course Jasper, you know I'm here to help you with whatever you need! What are your questions?"

Jasper, still with a confident air, gets straight to the point: "What is 'friendship' Lapis, what does it mean to be friends with people? And how can I become friends with people? You apparently have many friends, so I figure you must know."

Lapis can't help it this time; she laughs. Since Jasper's air of confidence has returned and is now backed by some level of real confidence as well, she says in a gruff and slightly annoyed tone with her arms still crossed: "What, Lapis, what's so funny? Why are you laughing at me, huh? Did I say something stupid, do you think I'm stupid?"

Lapis lets out a couple more snorting laughs before reining herself in and replying: "No Jasper, don't worry, I'm not laughing at you, or at least I don't think you're stupid, not at all! Your question is a smart one, because friendship is exactly the kind of thing you should be trying to figure out if you want to better yourself. What I'm laughing at is the irony of it, because you've already learned how to be friends with people and you don't even realize it! You already have a friend." Lapis smiles softly at Jasper upon saying this.

Jasper loses her composure as her arms come uncrossed and her hands fall to rest upon her knees, and she asks in an astonished tone: "I've... I've already figured out friendship? I already have a friend? How, why? How can you say I already understand something when I have no idea what it is? What is a friend? Who is my friend already?"

Lapis continues smiling at Jasper and replies by simply saying, "I'm your friend, Jasper."

Jasper looks even more astonished as she replies: "You're my friend? Already? But how? I still don't understand, what is friendship, what does it mean to say that we're friends, Lapis?"

Lapis explains: "Jasper, friends are people who share a bond, a connection, of mutual fondness, empathy, consideration, and support. It being mutual is very important; people say that 'friendship is a two way street.' You and I are already friends because our interactions and conversation tonight have embodied the very essence of friendship."

The smile in Lapis' eyes grows as she says: "We've been working to understand each other, we've been enjoying each other's company, and we've been caring for and supporting each other. Our interactions tonight are exactly what true friends do. I love having friends Jasper, and I'm very happy to be your friend! You've been a great friend to me tonight, Jasper. I've really been enjoying your company. You started off by telling me a story that was so beautiful it made me actually tear up a little, and since then you've opened up and shared some of your deepest thoughts and feelings with me and you've been incredibly supportive of me. Thanks to you, I feel much better about myself tonight than I usually do; actually, I haven't felt this good about myself in a few months! Thank you for being such a good friend, Jasper!"

As Lapis speaks, Jasper at first looks even more astonished before her countenance shifts to an expression of immense happiness and pride. A cocky smile returns to Jasper's face as she crosses her arms again and says: "Heh, well if that's what friendship is then you're right, I guess I've figured it out, at least with you anyway. I'm happy to be your friend too, Lapis. I'm proud that I've been able to make you feel good about yourself, because you're awe-inspiring and you should feel good about yourself. And you've done the same for me; your support has made me feel much better about myself than I ever felt back when I was consumed by insecurity, aggression, and false pride. So I'll say the same to you: Thank you for being such a good friend, Lapis. This is fantastic, it means I've already accomplished my Third Objective!" Jasper looks even more proud of herself as she says this.

Lapis raises her hand to her mouth and giggles again before saying in an amused tone: "Heh, so your 'third objective' was friendship, Jasper? That's funny and beautiful at the same time. Don't take my amusement the wrong way, because I'm proud of you too for accomplishing your objective!" Lapis is curious as to what Jasper's other "objectives" may be, but as a friend it wouldn't be right to pry; Jasper will disclose that information if she sees fit to do so.

Jasper does in fact choose to tell Lapis about her "Objectives" and satisfy Lapis' curiosity: "Yes Lapis, my Third Objective was friendship. My First Objective was to stop making everything about Steven and to properly respect him as a person. He's still very important to me, but as you said, the universe doesn't revolve around him. My Second Objective was to first apologize to you for my behavior the other night, which I've done, and then to apologize to Steven for how I've hurt him with my idiotic behavior. But I decided to accomplish my Third Objective of friendship before talking to Steven, as I realized you were right that he wants my friendship rather than my subservience, and I needed to understand what friendship is before I could offer to be his friend. I'm really not making everything about him anymore, but I still respect him a great deal, and I really want to be his friend now that you've explained what that means."

"We both know he'll forgive me, he's the most forgiving person in the universe after all, but I still have to apologize before I can offer him my friendship. I've now added the need to apologize to others, especially Amethyst, to my Second Objective. But those can come after I talk to Steven. What I need your help with now is to talk to Steven, as I have no means by which to contact him but I know that you do." Jasper isn't sure why, but she feels like telling Lapis about her Fourth Objective would be embarrassing and awkward. That's definitely for the best, because if Lapis knew that making her smile was one of Jasper's Objectives her mind would blow a fuse.

Lapis has tears of joy in her eyes again, and wipes her eyes with a forearm before replying: "Oh Jasper, that's so beautiful that you've made me tear up again! You've come so far already, so much more quickly than I ever expected, and I'm glad that you've surpassed my expectations! You've figured out exactly what you need to do in order to better yourself and atone for what you've done in the past. As your friend Jasper, I'm so proud of you."

"As for Steven: Yes, I have a means to contact him by using a human communications device called a 'phone' to call his own phone. For what you plan to talk about with him, a video-call where you can see each other would be best. You need to understand though that Steven is currently on a journey of self-discovery, so he may be busy and not answer, and even if he does he might not have time for a long conversation, so if that happens you'll have to be patient, okay? Do you want me to try calling him tonight, or do you need some time to prepare yourself before calling him someday soon? If we're going to call tonight it should be soon, as it's getting a bit late; it's only been a couple days so he should still be in this time zone, and it's important to remember that he needs to sleep like other humans. It's not that late, he won't be going to bed for a few hours, but Steven likes to have time to himself later at night these days. So what do you want to do, Jasper?"

Jasper doesn't have to think things over as she immediately replies: "I'm ready Lapis, please call him right now. And I'll be patient if he doesn't answer or can't talk for long right now, because I'm trying to be truly strong now and you taught me that patience is a form of strength."

Lapis smiles at how seriously Jasper is taking their "lessons," and replies: "Okay then Jasper, if you're sure you're ready then I'll call Steven now! I hope he's free to talk. Don't say anything at first, I'll start the call with just me in the camera frame and then I'll tell him that someone's here who wants to talk to him. Do you want me to tell him it's you, or should I just tell him someone wants to talk to him and let you introduce yourself? At that point you can just walk over to stand next to me and he'll be able to see you."

Jasper replies, "alright Lapis, understood. You don't have to tell him it's me, I will introduce myself." Lapis has a waterproof smartphone of course, and leaning slightly forward in her chair for a moment she materializes it from the gemstone in her upper back and uses a water-arm to pass it into her hand. She pulls up the Atmosphype app and dials Steven for a video-call. Jasper watches as the so-called "phone" in Lapis' hand produces a ringing noise, and suddenly finds herself becoming extremely nervous as she's possessed by an urge to flee. "No," Jasper thinks, "I can't run away from this. I have to own up to my past mistakes. And I want to be Steven's friend. I want to make things right between us like I did with Lapis. If I want to be truly strong, I must have the courage to stand my ground rather than flee."

Lapis already has the app on speakerphone mode, and although she can't see the screen, Jasper hears the phone produce a clicking noise as it suddenly stops ringing. She then hears Steven's voice emanate from the phone as he says, "oh, hey Lapis!"

Notes: So yeah, the thing about Jasper realizing she needs to apologize to people has been a long time coming. And alongside Steven, she obviously owes the biggest apology to Amethyst.

I capitalize Jasper's "First Objective," "Second Objective," etc. when seen from her point of view, as she views her "Mission Objectives" as something very "official," while I don't capitalize 'objectives' when seen from the point of view of others like Lapis.

My headcanon is that Lapis trained her water-manipulation, as she explains to Jasper, during the two years. Monster Steven was way more physically powerful than Blue Diamond, and yet Lapis somehow proved capable of restraining him for an extended period of time; Lapis' water-powers in "I Am My Monster" in fact proved to be more powerful than the partially-formed Cluster, as Monster Steven had to "scream" with a Pink Aura shockwave to break Lapis' hold but was able to break the Cluster's grip using physical might. Lapis was always unbelievably powerful and likely "The Ultimate Lapis Lazuli" to begin with, as evidenced by her ability to physically restrain Blue; but she seems to have become even more powerful after two years. That's why those other two Lapises treated her as if she were a Diamond once she stomped them, because her power is likely now very close to that Blue and Yellow even with their Auras if she was able to restrain Monster Steven like that.

As for the concept of Gems training: Clearly they're able to grow more powerful (not just more skilled) to some extent by training, as Amethyst seemed to do so when she trained to fight Jasper a second time, and Jasper chose to train not only her skills but her power as well, which she wouldn't have bothered with if she wouldn't gain anything from it. Peridot trained her metal-manipulation to become more powerful over time, so we know that more "magical" Gem powers like Lapis' hydrokinesis can also be trained. I suspect that Gems can grow by training, but just like humans they have a base-level as well as upper limits determined by their natural talent, which is why Amethyst will never be able to beat Jasper in a fight even if Jasper slacks off while Amethyst trains for a whole century. That would also explain how Pearl, who wasn't made to be a soldier-type, was able to grow powerful enough to poof droves of Quartz soldiers during the Rebellion.

So about Jasper saying that Steven forgives everyone and is the most forgiving person in the universe: I'm well aware of the interview in which Rebecca Sugar stated that Steven in fact isn't a forgiving person and rather just bottles things up and forces himself to not dwell on grudges. However, the point is that it's Jasper who's saying this: Just like other Gems, she is under the impression that he's the most forgiving person ever, and has no reason to believe otherwise. Her knowledge on the matter is unreliable. Also, none of this is to say that Steven doesn't forgive people: He's just not some kind of saint when it comes to that.

For those who aren't aware: Bismuth was indeed the one who poofed Lapis during the war, that's been confirmed by Rebecca. Rebecca also confirmed that Lapis is unaware of that fact (most likely because it happened so quickly and she didn't get a good look at her attacker). Bismuth of course wouldn't remember the event at all, since she was fighting in a hellish war and didn't have the luxury of being able to take the time to get a good look at or think about the Gems she attacked; all she knew was that she saw a Gem from Homeworld, poofed that Gem with hardly a thought, and moved on. Obviously it's for the best that both Lapis and Bismuth are unaware of how Bismuth was the one who poofed her.