I don't own Young Justice or any DC comics characters.
Thanks for reading this bizarre story I came up with.
16 Hours Later
MOUNT JUSTICE
Green Arrow POV
"Conner you should try harder to knock him off balance," Black Canary tells Superboy as he trains with Aqualad.
Dinah and I were hoping to go out for dinner as soon as training was over for the team, but it seems to have gone over schedule.
"HIYAH", I hear one of them take Dinah's advice, and it's not Conner. Aqualad kicks his leg causing Superboy to tumble out of the ring.
"GAME OVER"
The computer announces the end of training.
"UGH," Superboy complains. "You beat me again!"
"Next time you should take Black Canary's advice," Aqualad responded, offering a hand. "Or I will again." The two of them hit the showers.
"Now that that's over with..." I point out.
"Fine we can try that new restaurant," Dinah responds. "It better not end up like the last one!" she responds sharply.
"How was I supposed to know about that?" I respond defensively.
"I feel like you are the only person who could find a restaurant that would try to eat us."
"Oh come on I'm sure someone else would-" She gives me a stare that casts doubt.
"Recognized Superman. 01. Recognized Green Lantern. 01."
"Oh Clark your-"
"Where is he?!" Superman asks in anger I have never seen radiating from him with a concerned Hal staring at him from behind.
"Where is who-" I try to ask.
"[PSHEWWWWWWW]" Dinah and I duck.
Did he just fire heat vision! Why at us?!
"A-A- Are you alright?" Dinah asks.
"Just answer where he is!" Hal says quickly.
"Where who is?" I ask again. Hal uses his ring to create a hand construct that points behind us. Dinah and I look back to see the R symbol engraved behind us.
"Is this about what happened with Lex?" Dinah asks in a calming voice hoping to calm Superman. "I saw the headline-"
"Where. Is. He?!" Clark said in a slower, angrier voice.
"Why is the cave on fire?!" Barry yells in confusion. All of us turn to the injured Barry walking down the hall with John Stewart. Barry had bandages wrapped around his head and a cast on his left arm. John meanwhile used his construct to help himself float as both of his ankles were broken alongside eight of his ribs.
"What happened to you two?!" Hal asked in concern. Superman meanwhile continued to stare at the R symbol in the wall.
"Apparently his wife," Barry said pointing to Clark.
Dinah and I stare at each other to communicate via mouthing an facial expressions (something we developed over years of dating).
His wife! Dinah mouths.
Lane? I respond.
Does Lane have super strength? she points to their injuries.
Is there anyone else?
You should ask him.
WE should ask him. PLEASE don't make me do this alone.
Somebody needs to deescalate if he gets too angry.
"Who told you that!" Clark said in a fast, insecure voice.
"You don't honestly believe the kid, do you?" John ask Barry.
"Well why would he lie about that?" Barry responds.
"Did Robin tell you that?" Clark asks them, clenching his fist.
Did Robin learn Clark is married? Dinah asks.
I just shrug back and point to the other three. Watch.
"Well why would Robin lie about Clark being married," Barry says. "And she referred to you as her love too." Barry points to Clark.
"Who said that!" Clark said in a fearful panic.
His LOVE. I mouth to Dinah.
Were we not invited to the wedding? Dinah asks me. If so I blame you.
This coming from-
"Your wife." Barry said coldly.
"Did she do that to you?" Hal, who had been unusually quiet, intervened before Superman, asking Barry and John. "His wife?" Hal points to Clark. Clark turns around and red-eyes him.
"Who is claiming to be my wife!?" He yelled in booming voice that hurt my ears.
"Did you not see the chick that blew up LexCorp?" John said.
"NO! WHO IS SHE?" Clark asked with angry desperation in his voice.
"What did Robin say her name was?" Barry asks John.
"Maxshima," Barry said.
"MAXIMA!" Clark yelled in horror. He then proceeded to grab his head and shake it in a bunch of directions. "UGHHHH" he proceeded to scream into his arms. "WHYYYYYYYYYYY-" he cried into the air.
Do you know her? I ask Dinah.
No, have you every heard of her? She asked back.
"You are married to the Queen of Almerac!" Hal exclaims.
"We got beat up by a queen?" Barry says.
"Are you a King?" I ask, Dinah also looks at Clark wondering the same thing.
"NO!" Superman yells. "She thinks we are married." All of us are perplexed by his statement. "Her people have a system where they marry and reproduce with the strongest, typically out of group of 10, thus to increase the power of their family."
"And she thinks your gong to give her a child?" Dinah asks. "With 9 other people?"
"Yes." All of us stare at him, wondering many things.
Does he have a(nother) kid?
Is he planning to have one?
Is he married to 9 other people?
Will he use-
"BUT I DON'T WANT TO!" he says quickly trying to clear things up. "Yet she keeps going around calming, I'm the wife of Kal-El of Krypton, the Superman of Earth." The four of us take a second to process the existence of Clark's stalker.
"Well she convinced Robin that you two are married," Flash said.
"And Robin convinced Lois you two, or ten, were married," Hal said out of nowhere. All of us stare at Hal in curiosity, except for Clark who looks in horror. Barry drops his jaw with a smile, Dinah continued to blink as she though this through, and John seemed to not believe Hal.
"Robin convinced your girlfriend that you were married?" Barry asks.
"I-Uh-I-it-I-" Clark proceeded to have a breakdown.
"And that she'd his eleventh wife," Hal added.
The four of us stare at each other before I end the silence.
"HAHAHAHA," I can't compose myself and fall to the floor.
"Hahaha-ow-haha" Barry couldn't hold it together either and leaned against the wall before falling in laughter.
"Stop it!" Superman said weakly.
"Oliver thats not- Hahahah I'm sorry Clark." Dinah joins us on the floor. "This is just too good."
"John!" Superman begs for an ally with puppy eyes. John is silent for a while before smiling.
"So does she think you're a polygamist or-"
"HAHAHAHA" I'm sure out loud laughter on top of his super-hearing was ringing in his head for a while. I stopped paying attention to him and focused on the possibilities.
"Do you think Bruce planned this?" I ask still smiling.
"No way! This is too random to have been planned." Hal told us.
"Ha he More importantly why would Bats do something like this?" Barry asked.
"I think he's still mad about Nightwing," I suggested. Clark's face lost the ability to do anything as he reconsidered everything that happened up to this point.
Bruce was furious after whatever happened between them, neither will talk about it leading to endless gossip among the league, but Clark knew. Clark had talked Dick into assuming his new superhero identity after Bruce fired him. Bruce viewed Clark as encouraging Dick to ignore the mistakes that got him fired and it ended with Clark saying: "You don't have a monopoly on helping the people in your life and you don't always have good advice." Bruce and Clark patched things up since then, but I wonder if Bruce was plotting to 'help' Lois all this time. Would Bruce mess up Clark's relationship like this just to stick it to him.
"Recognized Superman. 01."
The five of us stared at the computer.
"Where did he go?" I asked. Hal rushed over to check the computer.
"Gotham City," Hal responded.
16 Hours Earlier
LexCorp Headquarters, Metropolis
The Flash POV
"LANTERN DO YOU HAVE THOSE WORKERS OUT!" I yell to a John Stewart four stories above me. I'm currently trying to contain the fires on the nineteenth floor of the building by creating a wind vortex with my arms.
"MY RING IS SAYING THERE ARE STILL THREE MORE PEOPLE!" Green Lantern said while holding fifteen people on a construct.
"NOT ANYMORE!" A third voice adds. A man, a girl, and a Robin descend via grappling hook.
"ROBIN!" Lantern said in pleasant surprise.
"No lifeforms detected in building!"
"YO FLASH THE THREE OF US NEED TO TALK AFTER THIS!" he tells me. John then begins to descent with everyone on board.
I look off into the distance and see some of the Metropolis Fire Department's helicopters come in to deal with the flames. I speed down to the bottom floor to talk with the cops about what I saw as I wait for the others. After too long they show up, with Lantern removing his construct for all but one person, who he helped move to an ambulance. The people we rescued start walking to the cops while Robin and GL walk towards me, to save time I run over to them.
"Robin what are you doing here," I ask the new boy wonder.
"Am I not allowed to run into a burning building after it was bombed," he told me.
"Is that why your Robin?" John asks, making me curious as well.
"Well I blew up a building and then Bats let me have the costume," he responds casually. John and I give each other a stare.
"What type of building?" I ask.
Before he can respond we hear a angry crowd behind us. The three of us turnaround to see people heckling and throwing stuff at us and the police. I see some items that might hit the cops in the head and use my super speed to move them out of the way before coming back to Robin and GL.
"What do they want?" Robin says annoyed. The three of us get into a range where we can hear their complaints.
"I work online!"
"-can't talk to my-"
"My homework-"
"-game is on-"
"They're complaining about the jam," Robin analyzed. The two of us look at him to explain what this jam is. He points to a giant digital billboard with a red haired woman giving an announcement. "She's sending out that signal in a way that jams every other wireless signal in the city. Internet and cellular is down in most of the city."
"So the people are angry they can't watch tv?" I say pointing to the crowd.
"[BOOOOM]" the flames of a cocktail bomb catch our attention.
"I HAVE A THOUSAND ON THE GAME SHOW ME-" the probable thrower of the cocktail yelled as police surrounded him.
"Is this what people did before TV?" Robin asks us jokingly. The two of us give him a get serious look, to which he throws back a look of disappointment. "So can you contact Superman?"
"We're covering for him," John said. "He's-"
"I know off in space. I overheard Bats earlier in the week. But considering that his wife's responsible, I think we should talk to him about it." Robin points to the red head on the screen.
...
...
What?
Did I miss another wedding!?
Or Lois turning evil and having red hair?
"Can you excuse us for a second?" John asks. I realize that I have not been paying attention for a while.
"I don't think we have time for-" Robin rebuts, but is cut off by a sound-proof construct.
"Did you hear what I heard?"
"That the red head on the screen is Superman's wife," I said. "Yes." The two of us just stare at each other.
"He's not married, is he?" John asks unsure. The Justice League is usually a social club, but somehow we all manage to keep some secret from each other until it explodes out into the open.
"NO! We've known him for years. I think we would know something like that."
"Then why would he think that." John said pointing to Robin. He tries to continue, but I'm distracted by what I see. "I haven't met the new kid yet-"
"John"
"-so are we sure this is Batman's-"
"JOHN," he finally gets my attention and I point behind him to see Robin... conversing with Lex Luthor!
John dissolves his construct and the two of us rush over to combat whatever Luthor is doing.
"Luthor what are you doing here!" I ask him.
"This is his building," Robin answers with sass.
"As the boy says," Luthor responds with trademark calm. "Now this threat to my life you were telling me about."
"What threat to Luthor's life?" John asked.
"His building just exploded," Robin answered for Luthor. "Of course someone is trying to assassinate him." Okay that's... very obvious. "Specifically her!" Robin points to the Lady on the screen.
"Why is she trying to assassinate him?" John asks. I can think of a few reasons why people would want to, but I can't say in this specific situation.
"Because-" he stops randomly for a few seconds. "LANTERN SHIELD!"
"[BOOOOOOOOM]" A massive force hits behind me, with a sound loud enough to be mistaken for a stadium. I turn around and see John holding a construct with a spider-web crack in it. Beyond the construct the redhead from the TV had her fists against the construct, which has moved from a half dome to a full dome encompassing Robin, Luthor, his assistaint (who I somehow missed earlier and didn't speak. Can she do Batman's ninja thing?), John, and I.
"[BOOOOOOOOM]"
16 Hours Later
GOTHAM CITY
Robin POV
"Freeze or I'll-" the crook attempted to intimidate me by holding a gun to the cashier's head. Attempted.
"You're out of bullets idiot," I respond. I charge at him, preparing to slam his head onto the checkout table in front of him.
"[CLICK]" he attempts to fire but he already fired the six shots in the revolver at me earlier, so nothing come out.
"Sh-" he attempt to scream but I slam his head into the checkout table in front of him taking the guy out instantly. He falls over onto the floor. "Take him to the-"
"[WOOOOSH]" Something causes the wind to go haywire, wrapping my cape around me.
"What was-" the cashier attempts to ask me. But the two of us look down and see our robber has dissipated. "Where did he go!?" he said in panic. "Maniac-"
"I handed him over to the police-" a voice that I have been waiting for comes behind me.
"[GULP]" He shouldn't be back for another two days.
"-file a report, they'll understand." I turn around and see Superman, arms crossed looking at me. The cashier is just starstruck that Superman is here. "Robin I need you to come with me."
Superman just grabs my shoulder and flies up into the sky at car-like speed.
"Hey! Let go of me!" I fight back. This is probably about telling his girlfriend about his secret child, and secret wife. The last mobster I did that too threatened to feed me to acid. Given what Supes has in the Fortress of Solitude I think he's going to feed me to something else.
"I need to talk with you," Superman said holding back anger. This is definitely about his girlfriend. "But first of all where's Batman and did he put you up to this!"
"[SIGH] He got captured by Catwoman."
"And you can't find him?"
"No I wish I didn't find them," I emphasize the wish.
"Why?" Superman asked not getting the hint.
"They were making out, probably about to-" at this point Superman stopped looking me in the eye. Now would be a perfect time to use the kryptonite knife I got from the Batcave... if I weren't a mile in the air!
METROPOLIS
16 Hours Earlier
"Son I would appreciate it if you were to bring my assistant to me," Lex Luthor asks me.
"[CLANK]" the two of us look at an alley and see his assistant on a dented car, bleeding from multiple spots, and unconscious.
"If you still want her," I reply to Luthor. I pullout a device from my utility belt which I use to scan Luthor. I then open a holo-screen for Luthor from the device. "Here I need you to read this." Luthor looks at the statement intrigued. "Out loud."
"Are you attempting to create a voice duplicator?" he deduces easily. "Why would you need this?"
"In case Flash and Green Lantern fail to take her down."
"Better start reading," he says as I grapple out of the alley I hid Luthor in.
A few minuets ago, Maxima, the self-proclaimed bride of Superman (with enough Kryptonian abilities to make me think she's his baby mama), showed up to the burning site of LexCorp HQ and tried to attack Lex Luthor. In a scuffle between her and Green Lantern, Flash used his super speed to move Luthor and me to an alley three block away from the fight, then told me to watch over Luthor as I was too inexperienced to deal with a heavy hitter.
Of course I'm going to ignore that advice.
I've dealt with Killer Croc, Bane, and an alien warlord named Mongul. I am totally prepared for this $#!%.
As I get into range of the fight I see the Flash about to have his head smashed into the pavement under Maxima's boot. Instinctively I throw several explosive batarangs at her to distract her.
"[BOOOM]" the first one hits her easily, but she grabs the second one and crushes it in her hand, if it exploded I couldn't hear it. She starts to fly into the air but is cut off by a green fly swatter sending her into a building. I'm able to land in front of the Flash to help him up while Green Lantern shows up behind me.
"You al- right," Green Lantern says with a gap for pain. After taking a look at Flash and Green Lantern's costumes, the damage is at least two bones on each of them with internal bleeding.
"I'm fine but the kid shouldn't be here," Flash says.
"Sorry but it looked like you needed someone with experience," I respond with a smirk.
"[WOOSH]" each of us duck and roll on all sides as a wall is thrown at us. Green Lantern goes in to attack Maxima with a giant Bat, but she emerges from smoke and hit the bat with her fist, nearly shattering his construct instantly.
"Kryptonians still have to breath," I ask Flash who seems puzzled by my question.
"Of course, they need oxygen to-" Flash responds with an over-explanation before I cut him off by giving him a gas mask.
"If you were to create a funnel around her and activate my knockout gas do you think you could make sure it doesn't dispute in the air. I think it will take a higher than normal concentration to bring down a Kryptonian."
"I'd be able to prevent it from spreading out but the funnel, but it would go too high in the air to be effective within a few seconds." He then looks at the mask. "I'd also probably use all the air in here in under a minuet." That masks designed for half an hour! Super-speed requires that much breathing?
"I think Lantern can keep it from going too high, but you'll also need to distract her from destroying his construct." I toss him all eight of my knock-out gas canisters.
"[CRACK]" Green Lantern is thrown through a wall and arrives at our feet.
"RUN!"
Flash zooms off and circles Maxima at a speed which makes a red tornado appear. I rush over to Lantern before Flash activates the knockout gas.
"Lantern create an air-sealed construct around Flash's funnel!" I order him.
"[BOOOM]" Flash set off the knockout gas.
"Why-" he attempts to ask.
"JUST DO IT!" I yell channeling Batman. Green Lantern sees the Batman in me and does as I say.
I activate the infra-red to check on Maxima. My idea seems to be working, as it shows her collapsing onto the ground, but as I check the clock, Flash has been running for 40 of 60 seconds. Maxima is holding out at the 45 second mark and I think Flash is slowing down.
10 seconds left and Maxima still has one arm holding her up.
8 seconds and she's completely on the ground, but wiggling.
5 seconds and Flash is probably at half speed, but thankfully she's stopped moving.
"I don't think Flash can take anymore," Green Lantern tells me.
"I think she's down but maybe we should be safe and knock both of them out with the gas," I tell Lantern as he undoes his construct against my advice. He then just stares at me as Flash rushes over to the two of us.
"[HEAVY BREATHING] I [HEAVY BREATHING] use [HEAVY BREATHING] a lot [HEAVY BREATHING] of air," Flash tells us as he lays on the ground recovering. I stare over and see that Maxima still hasn't moved.
"Do you guys have an inhibitor collar on you?"
"Why would we have that?" Lantern asks.
"I'm not going to judge what you guys are into?" The two of them stare at me as adults normally do when I make a joke not my age. "I'm taking that as a no."
"Its a no for many things you just implied." Flash tells me.
The three of us walk over to her as we ponder what to do with her.
"I say take her to Belle Reve," I suggest.
"Well if she believe herself to be Superman's wife maybe Arkham is a better choice," Flash responds.
"You can't hold aliens in Arkham, it would legitimize some other inmates views." Flash and Green Lantern give me a tell more look. "Do you want people who blame their problems on aliens to be around them?" Their facial expressions show they agree with me.
"Well we need to ask Clark if she actually married him then what to if-," GL starts talking.
"Of course we were married," the three of us are surprised by her voice- "I'll show you the pictures later!"
She had grabbed Flash by the ankle and swung him into the air. GL holds up a construct to try and block her attack. She then swings Flash like a nun-chuck into Green Lantern, who dropped his construct protecting us.
I'm sent several feet to the side as Maxima hits me with the Flash. Looking up, Maxima is beating Green Lantern into the ground WITH the Flash as a human nun-chuck.
"BEEP" My computer informs me that the duplicator is complete.
I was hoping I could use this for something more useful, but I'll have to use it to escape.
As Maxima still beat GL with the Flash I jump behind her and place two devices on her shoulders. She grabs me and throws me into a wall twenty feet away.
"[BOOM]" I activate the tear gas explosive I placed on her shoulder.
"[INHALE] Smells like perfume," Maxima tells me as she drops the unconscious Flash as a weapon.
"Alright bitch," Maxima looks up into the air and sees a floating Lex Luthor.
Lex Luthor POV
Usually I would enjoy watching the Justice League fail from a safe distance. But considering the woman beating will try to kill me after this, the mood feels off.
When I saw the new Robin Ra's told me about, I was hoping to manipulate the inexperienced view before the League drew an inaccurate picture of me into his memory. Unfortunately this incident has scuttled these plans. I started walking over from that comfortable alley once the threat seemed to have ended. However once I arrived it seems as though this woman was just playing dead, a gambit that payed of as she defeats two of the three (2.5) heroes standing in her way.
I was about to reveal myself and use my trademark charm and diplomacy to see what I could get out of this situation, but it appears a cruder version of myself is floating in the air.
"You want me come and get me," the floating version of myself says. At the same time somebody sneaks up behind me and grabs my mouth. Robin moves his head forward and holds a finger to his lips.
"With pleasure," the assassin flys at the hologram, as it keeps distance from her. A holo-computer tracking her come out of Robin's costume, after a while he lets go of my mouth.
"We're clear for now," Robin tells me.
"Please tell me why she won't question my ability to fly?" I ask Robin, given how much this distraction relies on it.
"She's not familiar with Earth." An alien? And here I thought I was dealing with another rogue employee.
"Why would an alien be trying to kill me?" I ask to see if responds with a Superman related quip. If he does, I know what he thinks of me.
"Some weird coming of age custom." He didn't quip? Or was that just an inside joke. Either way I think I can get something interesting out of the new Boy Wonder.
"How did she get here?"
"Something called the Phantom Zone, an intergalactic travel intermediary." The Phantom Zone is a extra-dimensional prison. But the boy doesn't seem to be that familiar with off-world affairs. "That's it!" The boy then has an idea on his face.
"What?"
"You're one of the ten smartest people in the world right."
"The smartest," I correct him.
"Great I think I know how we can get rid of her!" He runs over to a nearby car.
"[SHATTER]" He breaks the glass on the drivers side of a car.
"Get in!"
"Should we really be stealing a car?" Though mine appears to have be destroyed during the fight.
"Nobody can call the cops... if all wireless communications are down then there is probably wide spread looting," the boy points out while grabbing his face. "#$%^! I'll deal with that later, get in!"
METROPOLIS GENERAL HOSPITAL
Lois Lane POV
"Ughhh" I moan as I get up. Looking around I tell I'm in the hospital, but how did I get-
Everything comes back to me. Robin, Superboy, and KAL! I grit my teeth a little.
"Lois," Jimmy calls for me. "Are you alright?"
"Just a heart-Headache Jimmy. I look around and see that I'm on a makeshift bed in my work clothes rather than the typical patient clothing. I look around and see people bleeding as they wait for medical treatment. "Jimmy what happened?" This looks more like Gotham than Metropolis.
"Somebody's blocking all wireless communication in the city along with reports of superhuman fighting led to people thinking they can get away with looting."
"Whose blocking-" I wonder if that... that woman Robin mentioned has anything to do with-
"[KCHEWWWWWW]" A flash of light appears outside my window, generating a noticeable sound.
"Jimmy there's our story." I get out of the bed and try to find my shoes.
"Wait Lois shouldn't we wait for-" Jimmy attempts to stop me.
"Somebody to steal out story! NO WAY!"
STAR LABS, METROPOLIS
30 Minuets Later
"This is where that massive light came from," Jimmy tells me as we get out of the car we... borrowed while no one else was looking. "Are you sure something is happening here-"
"[BOOOOM]" An explosion comes from inside the building, gaining our attention.
"There's your answer," I tell him. The two of us then run into the building.
As we enter we see spider cracks on walls, craters in the floor, and fragments of exploded things spread throughout the building.
"Well whatever happened here is clearly gone-" Jimmy tries to tell me.
"[SCREEEEEEEEEECH]"
An unbearable sound has Jimmy and I unable to stand as we try to cover out ears.
"DAAAAAH!" we scream!
I crawl forward to what I think is the origin.
"[SCREEeeech]"
The sound comes to an end. As I stand up I see why, the redhead from the TV has Robin by his costume, holding him above the ground in a threatening posture.
"Lois what was-" I use a shush gesture to quiet Jimmy as I observe.
"Well you've been a bad boy," she tells him. "The only reason I haven't punished you more is because my husband is friends with your dad and I'd rather not have him avoid me more" Her husband... THIS IS KAL'S WIFE.
"Maybe your husband maybe your husband and kid would spend more time with you if you weren't an annoying bi-"
"[SLAM]" She throws the boy wonder into the ground and stands over him with her boot.
"How dare you insult the Royal house of Almerac brat?! I am here to help my husband-" I'm sure my teeth grit there a little. "-the champion of your world's future kingdom."
"We aren't in your Kingdom!"
"Then perhaps we have to change that boy!"
"Superboy King of Earth? Doesn't ring!"
"My Superboy will be king of more than that!" Her Superboy!
SHE-She... she... SHE'S HIS MOM! A part of me always though that the kid was Kal's son but... I never thought who the mother could-
"Lois do you know who she is?" Jimmy asks me. I take a deep breath as I consider the evidence Robin presented to me earlier. "Or who her husband is?" I don't know what Jimmy saw but when I turned around his face was mortified.
"LUTHOR NOW!" I'm brought back to reality by Robin's yell.
Luthor is here! What does he have to do with all of this?
"[GROOOOOO]" Some machine activates creating a portal in the room. The portal starts sucking everything in. Jimmy and I hold onto the wall as the force gets stronger, but have to turn away to keep focus on the wall..
"YOU CAN'T SEND ME BACK THERE!" I hear her say in fear. "I'LL BE BACK!"
"AND WHEN YOU DO YOUR SON AND I WILL KICK YOUR #$$!", Robin yells back.
[BOOM] Something explodes but I can't tell what it is. The force continues to go off and I have to hold Jimmy's hand when he lets go of the wall and is almost sucked in.
"[UMMMMMMM]" The machine appears to have been turned off. I no longer feel a force attempting to suck me in.
"Is it ok to go in?" Jimmy asks with his eyes closed.
"I believe it's ok to go in Mr. Olsen," one of the last people (though if my boyfriends wife can show up I may have to rethink the list) I expected to hear said.
"Lex Luthor!" Jimmy and I yell. He simply smiles in amusement. "What are you doing here!"
"Maxima was trying to kill him," Robin interjects. We turn around and see that most of his costume was damaged in almost every spot.
"Who?" Jimmy asks.
"The chick who was jamming the airwaves." Kal and Maxima -El... or Kal-el and Maxim-el or... HIS ADOPTED PARENTS! He still hasn't told me his secret name! Did she take- "YES!" Robin's yell brings me out of my thoughts. "The jammer was on her! Metropolis now has wireless communication!"
"Really Jimmy can you go live!" I ask him.
"Sure I-" Jimmy adds.
"Hold on I need to make a call," Robin interjects. "This is Robin to Justice League, I need emergency medical treatment for two leaguers at the following coordinates, riot control for the following districts of Metropolis, and a investigative team at STAR LABS Metropolis." He goes silent for a while.
"Can we-" I try to ask but Robin just holds up a finger to tell me to be quiet.
"Negative, both of them are down by an alien named Maxima." He's silent again as I realize he's having a conversation.
"No, I couldn't take her down so I threw into another dimension."
"I'm not joking."
"I threw the technology into the portal with an explosive- Hold on I'm getting another call."
"Batman I'm- Wait your where?!"
"No I'm not coming!"
"Why! Do you not remember what happened the last time I showed up to your ex-girlfriends. I don't wanna listen to that."
"I doubt that!"
"Really the one supervillainess you didn't-"
"Well IIIIIIII have to deal with Justice League business."
"Maybe but GL and Flash are down."
"Flash was used to beat GL."
"Like a human nun-chuck."
"I'm in Metropolis."
"Well Alfred thought it would be dangerous."
"Hahahaha! That was my response too! Hold on I need to get back to the JL. Here."
"No Batman's working a case in Gotham. Yeah he's fine with me going on a solo mission doesn't Green Arrow let you."
Are we recording this? I mouth to Jimmy.
He told me not to start. Jimmy mouthed back as I facepalm. Well I guess I owe the kid a huge favor for keeping me out of- whatever those two were into.
"She must have destroyed the platform. Can you get Kid Flash to run somebody here?"
"I mean you and Donna must not weigh that much."
"Would you rather have me be an #$$?"
"Have them go to Boston, it's closer?"
"Bat's needs my help so I should use the Batmobile to head back to Gotham."
"Well I work for Batman not the League."
"Bye!"
"Okay I gotta-"
"We get it, duty calls," Lex tells him. "I'll answer all of your questions Ms. Lane."
"At least let us take a photo with the heroes of Metropolis," I ask them. "Jimmy take a photo for the front page tomorrow." He looks at me but I signal for him to get on with it. Robin and Luthor start smiling and shaking hands.
"[FLASH]"
"Lois are you sure you want to give Luthor this kind of puff," Jimmy asks me. "What will Superman think?"
"Oh it will make him angry and confused. Well I would hate for Kal-" I crumble some paper in my hands "-to feel like that."
"Gotta go!" Robin says. He leans in to whisper something in my ear. "Can you make sure Superman doesn't come after me?"
"Sure kid."
LOIS LANE'S APARTMENT, METROPOLIS
16 Hours Later
Robin POV
She said she would handle this!
Now I've been flown from Gotham to Metropolis to deal with this. To be honest I'm not going to care about Superman's private life. The only reason I'm not going to use the kryptonite knife is because I need Supes to take me home. The Metropolis Zeta platform is still bust, and I used the spare Bat-cycle here to get home yesterday, so I guess flying meta-human is my only way back.
"Lois please come out we want to talk," Superman announces triumphantly.
30 Minutes Later
"Lois," Superman yelled. I just continued to play on my computer.
"I don't think she's here," I whisper at a level that only super-hearing can hear.
"I'm using my x-ray vision."
"This is why she doesn't trust you."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Superman asked with insecurity.
"I wouldn't trust somebody who x-ray's me without asking."
"Its... That's... That's not how it works."
"[SIGH] I'm hungry," I complain to him.
"We can eat once this is over."
"[DEEP BREATH] I AM HUNGRY!" I yell.
"What do you expect that to accomplish?" a perplexed Superman asked.
"Well I was about to make dinner soon," Lois adds opening the door. "Why don't you come on in?" I step through the door backwards, smiling victoriously at Superman.
"Loi-" He can't even finish her name before-
"[SLAM]"
Well thanks for reading 16K of what I intended to be one chapter (ch 1-3 was supposed to be one chapter). I have no idea how I wrote so much.
Well thanks for reading this.