We were finally going to the beach. The outing had been pushed back long enough and I was itching to see water. I loved the forest that was Forks - it was straight out of a fairytale, sure - it just didn't compare with the ocean. Maybe I'd change my mind, though, because this was the Pacific. The Pacific was notorious in Miami for being cold and unwelcoming, unlike the Atlantic that even in the dead of winter in Miami was still warm enough to brave.

I sighed as I hopped into the Suburban Mike had shown up with. Nothing could beat the Atlantic in my opinion. I sat in the back with Angel and Erik, pressed up against the window as Erik leaned forward to talk to Mike, our resident driver for the day. I felt bad for Bella as she sat up front with Mike, Jessica in between them, babbling on about who knew what. Bella was a better person than I was for tolerating her. As we drove on, I let my mind wander to the Cullens. Bella had apparently invited Edward along, she told me as much last night on the phone, and I had to hold back my laughter. I couldn't imagine Edward Cullen at a beach relaxing in the sun, apart for obvious reasons. I did wonder why he declined the offer, though. I knew enough to know the Cullens couldn't be in the sun, evident when Jasper practically ran from the light. And it made sense for all the sunny days when they were absent from school.

It had been less than a day since I saw Jasper and had made up with him, yet all that happened in the span of a few hours was enough exhilaration to last me a lifetime. That boy was too moody for his own good. I chuckled to myself thinking about how he grinned when I admitted I couldn't keep my distance from him after that last kiss.

"Dani?"

I looked away from the window, only now realizing the car wasn't moving. Everyone had gotten out of the car except for me. Angela was staring at me in concern. I flushed as I hurried to climb out, ignoring Jessica rolling her eyes. It would ruin the day if I made her cry so early.

As we walked farther down to the beach full of driftwood, I made easy conversation with Bella and Angela.

"So, Angela, how do you think you did on the Crucible pop quiz?" I asked, stepping over one of the logs.

She groaned. "It was fine, I just didn't expect it!"

Bella laughed as she trailed behind us. "I'm pretty sure that's the point of a pop quiz." She seemed deep in thought.

I started walking backwards to face her. "Is someone sad because a certain Cullen couldn't come?" I teased. She blushed and looked at everything but me. I smirked, knowing I had her. "Well, it's okay, next time we'll invite the whole gang, a nice outing for the lovebirds."

The pink traveled across her face, even to her ears. "That's not possible," she muttered, so low I had to strain to hear her properly.

Angela was just as curious. "Why's that, Bella?"

"Yeah, trouble in paradise?" I joked.

"We're not together!" She crossed her arms petulantly and I felt bad for going overboard.

I saddled up next to her and threw an arm around her shoulders. I nudged her with my hip, but maybe that was a bad idea as she teetered to one side precariously. I held on tighter and steered her forward.

"Alright, remind me to never do that again."

We all shared a laugh. Bella's clumsiness was nothing new to us, especially not after weeks of PE together. We idled on down the beach at the large group that had now gathered there. Other kids from our classes were present, most I didn't know, so I settled for waving from afar. Some gave me strange stares and it made me uncomfortable - what did I do now?

I leaned in to Bella and asked if she knew something I didn't.

She looked at me strangely too. "It's because of Jasper, Dani."

I was sure I looked affronted. "What does he have to do with that?"

"The fact you're together? The fact you sat with the Cullens? That matters to them, you know."

I huffed angrily. "What a load of bullshit." I glanced at her. "Just wait til it's you and Edward, that'll give me some reprieve."

She was shellshocked at the mere mention of it. I shook my head at her reaction. She sure had it bad too. It gave me some solace to know that Jasper could feel emotions and he told me what Edward was going through, or at least part of it. I think he kept the vamp parts out of it and left me with the feel-good, touchy-feely aspects to consider, like how he couldn't bear to be away from her. It reminded me of Jasper and I, then again, what didn't? I hadn't stopped thinking of us since he dropped me off, so that wasn't saying much.

As I thought about my boyfriend? - who knew - we all deliberated what we wanted to do at the beach. To not stay with the girls was an easy decision; I chose to hike, if only to keep Bella from falling and dying in the woods. It also meant I could just let my mind wander. I had some serious thinking to do, mostly concerning the vampire parents I was set to meet tomorrow.

We set out on the trail and I went behind Bella as a precaution. She seemed to be able to handle the fist parts of it fine enough, but who knew how bad the woods got? It was during the beginning I began to consider just what someone wore to meet their boyfriend's vampire parents. Did I dress up? Did I bring something? It's not like I could bring wine, fuck it if it looked close enough to blood. If Jasper could hear me, I knew he'd be trying to soothe me. It wouldn't work. I was afraid they'd hate me for ignoring Jasper after he confessed about his history. Any sane parent would be mad. Worse yet, what if they didn't think I was good enough for Jasper?

I wasn't self-conscious normally, except for people's more stable and not broken minds, but I was very self-conscious when it came to Alice. I loved her, she was a sweetheart to me. I just still worried in the back of my mind that she was a better match for Jazz. Namely, she was a vampire, had known him for decades, and was a part of the family, hell everyone was in a frenzy when I let it loose they weren't together.

I took a break to lean against one of the tree trunks. I relished in the rough bark against my hand; it reminded me I was still present and not too lost in my thoughts. The last thing I wanted was to think too hard. I could just barely see Bella up ahead if I squinted. At least she hadn't fallen too badly yet. Bella falling was expected, it was just a matter of how bad the fall was.

I pushed off the tree and continued the route. I let my mind go again and this time it went to my mom. She had been worried when I hadn't mentioned Jasper ever again. She had known the topic was taboo as opposed to before when I knew she had gossipped with Esme over when something would happen. I was sure Esme was aware the minute it happened and the minute it ended and the minute it began again. My mother? She had designs to worry about and I let her be. She also had a crazy ex-husband out to get back together with her, or at least have me back in his life. I shivered thinking about the man I unfortunately called my father sitting out in his car, parked on our lawn just waiting. Chief Swan had to be called numerous times to remove him from the premises. Threats of restraining orders thrown around too. I could hear my mom weeping in the room across from mine that night and it broke my heart. It was that same night just a week ago that I swear I dreamt of Jasper. I had been bleary-eyed and thought I'd woken up from a bad dream of the red eyed man when I saw something in the corner of my room. I could've sworn it was deja vu, this wasn't the first time. I knew it. Yet I was too sleepy to fight it. Instead, I'd reached a tired hand out to the figure that looked so much like my favorite blond before it fell to my side again, and just like that I was asleep once more.

I smiled at the thought of Jasper showing up in my dreams. My body had been trying to tell me something then, I guess. That boy, man, immortal being, whatever he was, would be the death of me. Literally.

That morbid thought brought me to my next worry: would people expect me to be a vampire? I wanted to laugh at the incredulous scenario I had landed myself in. Who would've thought I'd ever start to date a vampire, much less have to consider if I would have to be a vampire. It would be infinitely easier for Jasper to be around me if I had no blood to tempt him with. But… there was so much I wanted to do. I also did not know if I could put up with that moodiness for the next few days, much less decades. There was also the thought of never growing old, outliving my mother, having to explain to my mother, or even worse, never saying goodbye to my mother! The very thought made my chest constrict so tightly I thought I would collapse on the trail.

I breathed in deeply as I clung to a branch at my side. Deep breaths, I had to remind myself. I heard Bella call behind her to see where I was and I shouted something, just to let her know to keep moving. I couldn't give my mother up. That was a no go.

I took one more deep breath and made to continue to move. I focused solely on the trail now. I took notice of every little moss covered stone I stepped on, the different branches I had to push aside to walk past, the way the light just barely filtered in through the tall trees' leaves. I made sure to memorize everything, if only to block out the thoughts threatening to intrude. I would not think of that anymore, not today at least.

All too soon, the trail had ended and the break in the trees led me back to the beach where everyone had sat in a circle on the logs already there, sharing food and laughing. Oh, to be young and carefree. To be healthy and sane. That's all I ever wanted and yet here I was.

I pushed the intrusive thoughts to the very back of my mind. Those could be saved for bedtime when I would let them run amuck until I knocked out.

I took a seat beside Bella who had Mike on her other side and Jessica on his. While she entertained him, I nudged Bella in the ribs. She looked at me questioningly.

I pointed across the fire at one of the tan boys who had joined us. "Someone's watching you, you know them?"

We both glanced over at the group of the tanned boys, one of them evidently older than the other, but the one staring at Bella like he was entranced seemed younger. I smirked as he noticed we were staring too. He shook his head and got up, making his way over. I leaned back onto one of my hands and ate the hot dog Bella had offered me upon arrival. This oughta be good.

"Hey, chances are you don't remember me, but I'm Jacob Black, Billy's kid. Isablla Swan, right?" he said, sticking out his hand.

Bella shook it. "Just Bella. And yeah, Charlie told me about you guys when he gave me the truck. Runs great by the way."

The boy grinned. He was pretty handsome, lanky and young, but handsome nonetheless with a bright aura about him. I decided to introduce myself too.

I put my hand out. "Daniela Rivera, or just Dani. Friend of Bella's and new to Forks. Also resident caretaker for our Bella here, making sure she doesn't die by tripping."

Bella made an indignant noise at that. "Ignore her," she told Jacob.

It was then that everyone started splitting off again to do another activity, some wanted to hike again, the tide pools for others, or just stay on the beach.

"Hey, do you want to go for a walk?" Bellas asked Jacob, throwing me a look that made it obvious it was just them.

I didn't take it personally. Jacob looked all too excited to spend time with our resident Snow White, so I wasn't going to intervene. Bella was in too deep about Edward to worry about that. I sighed, sliding off the log to sit on the sand instead. The two left to walk down the beach, effectively leaving me alone in a room full of people, so to speak. Our Forks High friends and acquaintances were mingling with the Quileute boys that had come down too, but most had dispersed, leaving the beach relatively empty. This meant my thoughts started rushing back to the front of my mind.

Jasper, Mom, Mortality - it sounded like a bad chant. I was too young to have to deal with love, hell, I just felt a pull to the vampire I couldn't explain. I was hoping he would be able to, but seems he couldn't either. It was all up in the air. I know he didn't expect me to choose anything off the top of my head, but I felt a responsibility to him. I couldn't fathom why. Mom? God, I wouldn't be able to leave her. Certainly, there were ways around it. Knowing her, she'd scream and bring brujeros to our door to cleanse me if she caught a whiff of the supernatural near her. She'd bust out the evil eye too. I laughed silently, twisting the very eye on my bracelet. It was watching out for me. Something had to be if I hadn't been killed by vampires yet.

I watched the sun go down on the crashing waves. It was rhythmic, a push and pull that calmed me down enough to even out my breathing. I hadn't even noticed it was ragged. The gold cut through the blue of the ocean and twinkled like diamonds over the sea. Again, I wondered what Jasper looked like in the sun. Would I have to hide from the beautiful sun I loved? Never go to the beach again? It was all ridiculous. And through it all, I didn't begrudge the blond boy. I had to be crazy.

Before it got too dark, everyone started packing and cleaning up. I stood up from my place in the sand, grateful no one had come to bother me during my reverie. I looked around for Bella and Jacob, seeing them a little ways away down the strip of white sand with Mike and Jessica running in front of them. It all felt so normal. It was a nice break.

Later, once we were in the car and Bella now sat in the back with me, she sidled up next to me with a confused expression.

"What's wrong?" My voice was a whisper amidst the raucous laughter in the car.

She shook her head. "I'll tell you later." She looked like she saw a ghost.

Mike dropped us off in order, which meant I was after Angela. I hopped out and wished everyone a good rest of the weekend, promising I'd see them in classes. What else would I do? I had my doubts Jasper would let my mom continue to drop me off at school, probably making her swoon in the process of convincing her to go with his family instead. He could make a rock swoon, powers or not. I unlocked the door, and stepped in, knowing Mami was inside already - her car was out front. I locked the door quickly behind me out of habit.

"Mami?" I called out, hanging my keys up.

"In the kitchen, mija!" I followed the smell of ground pork and rice to the kitchen and smiled at the sight. Mom was in her home clothes cooking with a bandana on, and if I closed my eyes, it was almost like home. Like Miami. Except we weren't.

She turned around to greet me but let out shriek instead. "Who told you to come into the kitchen and bring all that sand with you?"

Yeah, just like home. I turned and left the kitchen to go strip and find clean clothes to vacuum in. It was a quiet affair in the house today. I cleaned while she cooked, and dinner was lively with gossip from today and school. Esme and her never had gossip to share, probably because it was about their own kids.

I said goodnight and walked into my room, leaning against the door with my eyes closed. When I opened them again, I was paralyzed. The red eyed man was in my room again. I went to scream, but he wrapped his cold hands around my face, pinching it so hard it hurt to breathe. The hyperventilation began, and I knew this wasn't a hallucination. The pain was too real. There was so much I wanted to do, I couldn't die because this creep had it out for me. I wanted to see my mom again, my friends, Jasper, oh God, where was he? If the last thing I saw before dying was this man's pasty skin and crimson eyes, and died with his hands tightening around my skull knowing he could crush me in an instant… I would come back and haunt the blond.

I shut my eyes and waited with baited breath for the inevitable. But it never came. I was shoved even harder against the door, the air rushing out of me. I wheezed as I could breathe again. I opened my eyes to see the same fucking window he kept coming in and out of open once more, just like that first night. Except this time I knew what had scared him off. I pushed myself up with some difficulty, and inched towards the window. I peeked out, but saw nothing. The forest was quiet, the leaves just barely rustling in the wind. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and fell back onto my bed.

I clutched my pillow and groaned into it . "I'm tired of vampires!"

Not a second after I said that, a whoosh was heard. One guess as to who it was.

Cold hands plucked the pillow out of mine. I kept my eyes shut, but I heard the bed sink with the weight of the marble statue man sitting down beside me.

"Dani?" His voice was velvet, smooth, it made it seem like all was well, even though I knew it wasn't.

I sat up instantly as his hand trailed up and down my forearm. "Oh, no, Jasper. Don't try comforting me, I've had it with you crazy vamps out to get me." His trailing fingers persisted regardless.

He chuckled, though. "Only you would make it seem like I was out to get you. I'm only trying to make it better."

"Make it better by just ending that creep's life. Wait, he's already dead - I - you know what I mean!" I said, grasping for words.

A wave of peace enveloped me as Jasper wound his arms around my waist and shoulders, holding me like I would disappear at any given moment. He rocked me softly, whispering in my ear.

His laughter rumbled in his chest then. "You know, most people would be petrified after coming in contact with a vampire. You? Here you are the arms of one."

I pulled away slightly to look up at him. "I could very well be screaming and in hysterics right now if you want me to." I sighed. "It's not like he's the scariest thing I've ever seen, the things my mind makes up are sometimes worse than a pale man with red eyes and a bad case of bloodlust. The things I've seen Jasper… you wouldn't be able to fathom them."

I thought back to my earlier wondering on the beach. Tentatively, I asked him, "Jasper, when you become a vampire, what exactly happens?"

He seemed to freeze, not even faking the breaths he was taking anymore. I sat patiently in his arms, waiting for the shock to go away. He shifted, bringing me with me. "Why do you ask?" He finally muttered.

I wouldn't tell him I was going crazy today considering all the scenarios. Instead, I settled for the abridged version. "Well, consider this vampire kills me, what does that mean? Like do I even become a vampire or am I just an empty sack? Is it like Spiderman? Instead of a radioactive bite it's a vampire bite and poof, immortal?" I knew I was rambling, but Jasper let me get it off my chest all the same.

I looked up at the beautiful boy in my presence. His hair hung like a curtain around his face, a halo-like presence. His lashes were long and thick, contrary to his blond hair. He had high, chiseled cheekbones. His nose was sharp and straight. His mouth was slightly parted as he searched for words to explain to me. He was utterly beautiful. And that was only physically. Emotionally, he was a wreck, sure, but he was an empath and charismatic and God, did I feel safe around him now, all arguments out of the way now. I understood how someone could fear this creature, but I only saw the grace he held himself with, the humility he carried with him. He admitted to his faults, he tried, and he was mine. And I'll be damned if I was turned into a vampire by anyone but him.

Wait… no. No, no, no, no. Wrong thinking. Definitely not.

Jasper seemed to sense my unease and he had still not answered my questions. In turn, he decided whatever he had thought of was a good enough answer. "Becoming a vampire… is painful, to say the least. Alice briefly told you about Maria, yes?" I nodded. "Well, when she turned me, I distinctly remember the excruciating pain I was put through as the venom spread. It was like setting a person on fire. All your nerves are aflame, you just scream and scream, and then… you wake up. Some never do. Some lose their memories. I wouldn't wish it on anybody, Dani. The thirst is unreal, the ache, the pain. I can't say I regret becoming a vampire because I met the Cullens and now you, but it was a long time before I reached any kind of peace. Amidst all the warring in the Southern territories, Maria had me train newborns. It was gruesome. Especially when I had to get rid of them once their strength faded. I felt… everything. Every last emotion, the fear, the hatred, the desperation, I felt it tenfold. I hated my ability then. It wasn't until my friend Peter from the warring territories, it wasn't until he came back after running away that I saw something else was possible. He told me the North was tame, that vampires could coexist without constantly fighting.

"But then came the hard part: the diet. At first, I just moved around still feeding off human blood, and it's the one thing that makes you feel strong, human blood. Animal blood doesn't fill you the same way. When I was in Pennsylvania and found Alice in the diner - well, she found me," he laughed, "she brought me to the Cullens. Said I'd kept her waiting a while. And now I'm here, with you." His grip tightened and he put his head on top of mine. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Dani. I guess I gave you more than you asked for, though."

I twisted in his arms to look up at him. "Thank you, Jazz. I appreciate it." I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I know it must be hard to relive that."

He shook his head, his blond hair falling over his eyes as he looked down at me. "Dani, I mean it, I wouldn't wish this on anybody."

The meaning wasn't lost on me. My earlier thoughts, my worries over Jasper expecting me to be a vampire were gone. He didn't want me to be one. I didn't know how deeply my feelings ran for him yet, but hearing that was a rejection I wasn't expecting.

I placed a hand on his cheek. "I understand," I whispered.

I wasn't going to let this get the best of me.