..this..." - even the aloof Sasuke couldn't believe his eyes.
"That's why I tol - sigh...whatever crying about spilled milk isn't going to help... let's just do "that" and hope for the best..." - after being knocked away by Sakura Eiji appeared next to Sasuke again, though this time on the other side so that Sasuke and Naruto are between him and Sakura.
Anyway, for some reason Eiji felt completely serene while looking at the meteorite descending - it had some strange sort of beauty to him.
But he was the only one, everyone else was completely shocked.
"Dammit! I didn't even summon Fukasaku and Shima to enter Sage-Mode faster, but it looks like it's too late!" - Jiraiya finished gathering his chakra, but he wished he did that before Madara started to drop a meteor on their heads - now even with Sage Mode he wasn't sure if he could stop the meteor.
But he still needed to try and started to form a Rasengan as big as he could.
"What..." - Naruto who was full of spirit a while ago, watched with an open mouth.
'...can I stop this? My wood release may be able to stop this, but the amount of chakra I would need to use would make me lose my life...' - Yamato thought about using his life for the slight possibility of saving everyone else.
But he didn't get the opportunity...
"Slow down a bit, it's not easy to control!" - thankfully the Tengai Shinsei was a slow technique (but that made Madara's enemies be able to feel hopelessness a bit longer), so Eiji and Sasuke had enough time to make create a storm.
'Slowing down in the current situation? He was cowering a while ago and now he doesn't worry at all?' - Sasuke sighed internally but didn't say anything.
"Alright, I'm finished. Now it's your turn" - Eiji fully formed Byakko, but he still held it in place waiting for Sasuke.
But instead of just creating Kirin like Sasuke normally would do, he instead fused it with Byakko.
Instead of a giant tiger, the tiger had now electric armor and looked even more majestic and divine.
The power wasn't even comparable to the normal Byakko or Kirin.
It was so strong that even while not being released, the electric winds released to the surroundings where Naruto and Sakura even had to defend and the water under the bridge was completely running wild!
"HAHAHAHA!!! HOW INTERESTING!!! LOOKS LIKE I WAS MISTAKEN BRAT!!! NOT BAD" - Madara laughed happily while praising Eiji and Sasuke.
"Hmm...what should we call it?" - Eiji
"Release it already." - Sasuke
"Yes, yes...as always you are way too serious..." - with those words Eiji released it.
It traveled up and hit the meteor.
A loud noise erupted almost like a shriek and the meteor crumbled into thousand pieces.
But a huge piece was about to fall onto the bridge which might destroy it, but Jiraiya appeared with his Ultra Big Rasengan and destroyed it.
"...we really managed to avoid that..." - relieved, Sakura breathed in.
"Nah." - Eiji picked his nose while saying that.
"What are you talking about?" - Sakura
Instead of answering, Eiji just pointed with his finger above.
There, in the sky, another meteorite was descending.
"..."
"Goddammit!! Hey, Eiji, restore my body quickly!" - a girlish voice could be suddenly heard.
"Ha? Why should I help the enemy?" - Eiji looked at Tayuya approaching him.
"I'M UKON YOU IDIOT!! I had no choice to take over her body since the snake you gave me died and I run out of chakra, so restore my body finally!"
"That's good and all, but we have currently a bigger problem...you really shouldn't have come here, or is your comradeship perhaps so great that you decided to follow us to death?" - Eiji looked at the second meteor.
"Hm?" - Ukon looked and thought for a second.
"Hey, give me some chakra, I used up almost all of mine."
"If you want some chakra, ask orange boy over here..." - Eiji didn't understand why Ukon suddenly asked for chakra, but he really didn't want his last thoughts to be about Ukon before dying, so he didn't ask further.
"Hey, you give me some chakra!" - Ukon
"What? Why should I?" - Naruto asked annoyed.
"So that I can deal with that rock!"
"Naruto...we don't have much choice other than to trust her here..." - Sakura wanted to cling to a glimmer of hope.
"...alright..." - Naruto grabbed Ukon's hand and started to transfer chakra with a red face.
"?" - Ukon ignored it and when he sensed he had enough chakra summoned Rashomon.
It was right on time and the meteor instantly collided with the gate.
BOOM!!!
No one thought that Gate could block it, but to everyone's surprise, the meteor exploded.
Rashomon's ability to reflect damage turned out to be the complete counter of Tengai Shinsei!
'Wait...if that's the case...THIS GODDAMN SNAKE BASTARD JUST WATCHED US ALMOST GETTING SMASHED!!' - Eiji looked at Orochimaru who was watching happily from the other side of the bridge.
NARUTO!! STOP IGNORING ME AND LISTEN TO ME!!" - Kurama's agitated voice could only be heard by Naruto.
"What is it? Don't you see that it's currently a bad time for that? The enemy is super strong, you know! So if you keep blabbering I can't concentrate!" - Naruto tried his best to ignore Kurama and to focus again.
Now after the second meteor was countered by Ukon, Madara stopped throwing meteors at them and got his Susanoo to the complete form.
"IT'S ABOUT THE ENEMY!! It's Madara...you don't stand any chance! Swap with me and I'll give you all my power!" - Kurama
"...what's up with you all of a sudden? Why are you so generous to me suddenly?" - Naruto
"Because if you die it's the end for me as well!! Now do it quick!" - Kurama
"Hm..." - Naruto was unconvinced and because he was squinting, he looked like an idiot who was trying his best to solve a math problem.
While thinking, he suddenly heard Eiji's nearby voice: "Damn...isn't that kinda overkill what Madara does? Does he think he is fighting Hashirama or what? Nah, he is probably just bored...Sasuke, Ukon, lets just get outta here. And you guys (to Naruto and Sakura) should also get out of here."
Until now he couldn't think clear enough because of the whole messy and crazy situation he found himself in, but now he saw that even though the timeline is fucked, it's not too bad - emphasis on the "too" since its still really bad, but not everything was lost.
They just needed to not die here, especially Naruto and Sasuke, and the rest he could somehow fix with duct tape, metaphorically.
But this was easier said than done.
Madara's might made even escaping almost impossible.
The only way they could was if a handful of them sacrificed themselves and even then it wasn't sure if they could buy enough time.
"Ha? If we escape now, how will you regenerate my body? My body is still over there..." - Ukon pointed at the location where he fought.
His body was nothing more than a pool of blood, bones, and organs.
When Eiji saw that he understood why Ukon didn't carry his body over to Eiji.
"Hmm...Sasuke?" - Sasuke was quiet (even more than usual), so Eiji asked.
But he could guess what it was about.
Sasuke's parents, after regenerating, were attacking Madara with Gengetsu and Mu, since as undead they made the best vanguard while Jiraiya, Yamato, and the Anbu supported them.
But Madara was just playing around.
"So many fellow Uchiha's I see today...and furthermore another one with the Mangekyo Sharingan? You two must be that Sasuke kid's parents, seeing how you resemble him and always move in a way to be able to protect him..." - Madara was just standing there while his Susanoo did all the work - it was obvious to everyone here that he didn't take any of them seriously.
"Don't worry about that, Sasuke. I will buy enough time for you to leave with your parents...just make sure to take this idiot (Ukon) with you." - Eiji sighed.
"You..." - Sasuke knew Eiji too well to not be surprised about his sudden sacrifice.
"I have a plan, so it's alright. Naruto, go and tell the Konoha forces to retreat as well since I won't be able to tell them myself..." - Eiji grabbed his sword and carried it on his shoulder with one hand - it would have been a cool pose if he wasn't completely naked...
"What?" - Naruto asked, but was ignored by Eiji who started to march.
"Hm?" - Madara was a bit surprised seeing Eiji trotting, but not enough to not just swing a Susanoo sword at him.
This was however dodged by Eiji and he continued to approach Madara leisurely: "Hey, let's make a deal."
Seeing a brat (in his eyes) confidently asking for a deal, was pretty hilarious in Madara's eyes, so he stopped all his attacks and laughed: "Deal? That sounds interesting but I doubt you would have something of value to me..."
Eiji ignored Madara's ridiculing laughter and raised two fingers: "I have two things. The first is information about the origin of the Jubi and its creators...the second is I can revive Hashirama so that you can fight as much as you like..."
Dudum.
Eiji's words were total bomb drops and made everyone silent, especially Zetsu who's black half went pale as his white half.
Madara squinted his eyes: 'I was right, there is something uncanny about this brat...how does he know that I would love to fight Hashirama again? But more importantly...the origin of the Jubi? This is secret is only known to those who can read the Uchiha Stone Tablet...did the Uchiha brat next to him? No...he has only the Mangekyo Sharingan and not the Rinnegan, so he should be able to only read a part of it...'
He continued to think.
Fighting Hashirama again was definitely something he would love to do, but not if it would sabotage his plans.
And he read the Stone Tablet with his Rinnegan so he knew already about Kaguya, the God Tree, and Sage of Six Paths.
So he really didn't have reason to accept Eiji's deal, but Madara needed to find out how much Eiji knew.
But Madara was unsure if Eiji knew that and predicted it, or he really thought this deal was lucrative to Madara.
While these thoughts were running in Madara's mind, with his vast experience he kept a straight face and didn't show anything.
And then he finally asked: "...interesting...but there is something you have overlooked: First, why would I want the one who defeated me to be revived? Do you think I'm stupid? Secondly, even if I would want to fight Hashirama, why wouldn't I just revive him myself? And lastly, I already know that the Jubi original form is the God Tree, so everything you are able to tell me won't be new to me."
Eiji listened while picking his nose which slightly irritated Madara but he ignored it.
After taking a booger out and catapulting it away with his finger, Eiji looked towards Madara and said: "Well, when you saw wood release being used you had a face like you were about to go into a brothel, so anyone can see that you want to fight Hashirama again. When it comes to reviving him, you won't be able to because of the snake bastard over here (pointing at Orochimaru): not only Hashirama, but the second Hokage as well were revived by his Edo Tensei, and this idiot still managed to lose and get them both sealed away. Their souls are with the Death God, so no one can revive them. But I know how to get their souls from the Death God back. To the last point...you probably only know about the events concerning that Kaguya bitch, but not about her origins or why it happened."
"LET ME GO!! I'LL SKIN THIS SHAMELESS BRAT ALIVE AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" - when Black Zetsu heard Eiji call Kaguya a bitch, he instantly detached himself from White Zetsu and wanted to rush at Eiji, but he was stopped by White Zetsu: "Uhhh...calm down? I don't think it's good to be agitated like that..."
Even Madara was surprised that Eiji called a goddess bitch and stared at Eiji with an open mouth, while Orochimaru was seething over him being ridiculed.
In short. Eiji managed to piss or confuse everyone gathered here.
But that's what he wanted.
Sasuke grabbed Kabuto and Ukon (who was cursing and shouting about not leaving his body behind) and rushed to his parents and left with them as quickly as he started to move.
Jiraiya, saw that and instantly recognized Eiji's plan and did the same with Naruto and Sakura while nodding to Yamato who left with his Anbu too.
Jiraiya was hesitant about leaving a resurrected Madara behind, but he knew that a chance to escape like that wouldn't occur as well and that he should take the chance now.
"Hmm...you know what? Forget it, I changed my mind. I'm tired and heading to my inn. See ya!" - with those words, he used the last of his gathered natural energy and ran as fast as he ever did.
He never intended to have a deal with Madara!
"...wait, what?" - Madara only realized now what happened and started to use his complete Susanoo to cut everything in the direction Eiji run of to.
Meanwhile, Orochimaru started to transform into a small snake and hoped that no one would notice him...