Jesse forgot what's like to do things on impulse and had decided now that he was standing in front of his older sister's apartment that not thinking too hard before he called in sick and booked the first flight he found to go see her was definitely a good decision.
"Jesse, what are you doing here?" Sarah questioned in surprise.
"You can't expect me to listen to all the voicemails you left me and not hop on the first flight I found to see you," he told her as he embraced her in his arms, hugging her tightly.
"Dude, you shouldn't have come down here, you could have just called back," she mumbled, burying her face in his chest.
He sighed, resting his chin on her head. "Well, I've been looking for an excuse to visit the big apple."
"Come on in, Jess," she mumbled, breaking the hug and stepping into her apartment.
He closed the door behind him and looked around his big sister's one-bedroom tidy apartment. There was a pile of paper on the coffee table, students' paper to grade Jesse assumed. "Working?" he guessed.
"Yep," she answered, heading the kitchen. "It's just some essays that need grading." Yep, he guessed right. "Want something to drink?" She picked up an empty bag of ships from the coffee table.
"Yeah, sure." He watched her head to towards the kitchen.
"It's Friday night, surely the essays can wait." He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he followed her.
"They can." He heard her agree. "I just don't feel like doing anything tonight, I figured I'd work for a while." She dropped the bag in the garbage can.
He leaned against the wall watching his sister open the fridge.
"I don't remember what I talk to you about last night," she confessed, shutting the fridge with her foot after she pulled a beer.
"I'm not surprised. I could barely understand what you were saying for the majority of the voicemails." He took the beer from her. "What's wrong?" he questioned, deciding to get right into it.
He could piece it together from what she had told him on the voicemails she left but he wanted to hear it from her and get to the bottom of things before the weekend ended.
"More like what isn't wrong," she scoffed, leaning against the counter. "Ever feel so fucking lonely despite being surrounded by people?" she went on to add after a few seconds of silence.
"Every fucking day," he chuckled humorlessly.
She frowned meeting his gaze.
He was pleased with the front he put to keep his family from knowing about the state of his mental health, which he knew wasn't the right thing to do. He was well aware of the importance of having his family as a support system, he just didn't want them to worry. He was always the happiest most optimist one of the Swansons: he didn't want to shake that image. He was battling his demons, working through his issues one-step at a time with the help of his therapist.
"But I try not let it get to me 'cause I know that it's not true," he told her. "And, you do, too." He smiled curtly when she nodded and pulled her into a hug.
"You're not alone, Sarah," he said before he placed a kiss on her head, rubbing her back when she tightened her hold. He could feel her roll her eyes when he began to sing No One Is Alone from Stephen Sondheim's Into the Woods under his breath.
"Tell me," he said, pulling his head back. "What's gotten you feeling all lonely?" he wondered.
She shrugged. "I don't know." She paused. "Kelly left, that could be it… I don't know," she grumbled. "We didn't even fight or anything, we just came to terms with the fact that we don't want the same things and should probably end things for good. Like, she told me she wants to have a baby and I'm so not down to be a mother."
"When did you guys break things off?" he wanted to know, loosening his hold.
"Like a week after your birthday," she answered.
"Do you miss her?" He knew she would but he just wanted to know if she missed her because she still had strong feelings towards her ex-girlfriend.
"Of course, I miss her." She sighed.
"You know, I'm surprised it's me you called and not her last night," he told her as she pulled away from him completely and wrapped her arms around herself.
"I deleted her phone number and couldn't remember it." She glared at him when he chuckled.
"Sorry," he apologized, bringing the beer to his lips.
Two hours later.
Jesse was waiting for his sister to finish getting ready because they decided to go out. He listened attentively to his sister's rambles and offered advice when she got to the rough stuff that was behind the way she was feeling then talked her into going out and socializing when she admitted that she hadn't stepped outside of her apartment for another reason than work for about two weeks.
"What are you looking for?" He heard Sarah ask as he looked inside the fridge.
"We should eat something before heading out," he told his sister, pulling his head to look at her. "Except there isn't anything in here we could eat."
"There's a couple of bananas I think, we can eat those," she told him as she rested her forearms on the counter.
"They do not look edible." He pulled the four bottles of wine that all had some wine left in them. "Why do you have so many empty red wine bottles in your refrigerator?"
"They're not empty," she retorted, picking up his phone that was on the counter when it chimed with a text.
"Actually they are." He moved the sink, planning to rinse the empty bottles to put them later in a recycling bin.
"Beca texted an attachment, fingers crossed it's NSFW," Sarah sighed, crossing her fingers before she swiped to unlock her bother's phone.
"What did she send?" He titled his head and saw for himself when Sarah held his phone his way.
He chuckled seeing that Beca sent him a photo flipping off a poster of the latest Nicholas Sparks movie.
"I haven't seen this one," Sarah told him as she turned his phone away from him to scroll up their conversation. "I take that it's horrible?"
"It's not horrible. Beca hated it when we went to see it. I thought it was alright." He shrugged.
"You and your fuckbuddy go on movie dates?" Sarah arched an eyebrow.
"Um, we don't do that anymore," he informed.
"When did you stop?" she wanted to know.
"We ended it like a week after my birthday."
"And you still hang out?"
"Well, not really. Haven't had time to hang out."
He started offering lessons like he told Beca he planned to do which was filling his time and making him hate his day job less.
And, since she had sacked up and spoke to her parents and worked things out with them (sort of) Beca decided to stay in college (for now) therefore she was beyond busy trying to save the semester and get ready for the ICCAs (the latter mainly but she had put some effort into the few classes she was taking.)
"You sure text a lot, though. You basically went from sex friends to text friends."
"Yeah," he chuckled. "Basically," he agreed, drying his hands.
He tried to give Beca Mitchell the Beca Mitchell treatment… keyword; tried. He tried and failed. Jesse could not ghost her, he could not ignore her when she texted asking for advice—advice she wouldn't apply, he really didn't get why she kept coming to him for advice when she never took it.
He figured that she just wanted to get things off her chest and was there to listen, what he had to say didn't really matter.
"What are you doing?" he asked as he watched his sister type into his phone.
"Relax, I won't ask for nudes from your buddy," she mumbled.
"That wasn't my concern but now it is." He moved around the counter and leaned in to see what Sarah was doing.
Sarah: 'Bet you're just jelly it's not you Josh Duhamel is about to kiss.'
Beca: 'Jelly? Yeah, definitely not Jelly.'
Sarah: 'Josh Duhamel is quite the hottie, are you sure you're into dudes?'
Beca: 'You of all people should know how into dudes I am.'
Sarah: 'You could be into both. You wouldn't know until you've tried. Besides, you're in college, you're supposed to experiment in college.'
Beca: 'I'm having a strange déja vù right now 'cause dad gave me this speech except it was about college experience as a whole.'
Jesse rolled his eyes once he saw the exchange between his sister and Beca and took his phone from Sarah.
"Hey, I was typing," she complained.
"I'm aware." He deleted what she had typed without even reading it.
Jesse: 'Sorry that was Sarah texting you. She thinks it's her moral obligation to get everyone to have at least one same-sex hook up because you can't be 100% hetro if you never tried to homo.'
Beca: 'I see her point. Also, speaking of same-sex encounters, have you had any? Also, also, your sister is in town?'
Jesse: 'I haven't and do not intend to. I'm actually visiting her.'
Beca: 'What about just kissing another dude in New Year or something?'
Jesse: 'Nope, never.'
"If you're gonna spend the night texting your friend let's just order some food and stay in," Sarah suggested.
"No, we're not staying in." He shoved his phone into his pocket after telling Beca about his plans with his sister.
"Give me that," Sarah grumbled, reaching over to take Jesse's phone from his hand. "You can't text all night and ignore me. It's rude and very annoying since you're the one that insisted on going on." She tossed his phone into her bag.
"Sorry." He ran a hand through his hair. "Beca was just asking me about which subway to take to get back to where she's staying."
"Subway?" Sarah arched an eyebrow. "Your friend is in New York, too?"
He nodded. "She's competing in the ICCAs which are tomorrow. She and her teammates went out tonight to explore the city since most of them have never been."
"Why didn't you ask her and her friends to come join us?"
"Beca doesn't know I'm in New York."
"Why not?"
He shrugged. "No particular reason."
"Bullshit. Wait, is it because you don't want to go watch her compete at the ICCAs?" she guessed.
"No."
"I'd love to go see a bunch of nerds sing a cappella," she told him and watched the way he shifted in discomfort. "Just tell me why you don't want to go watch the ICCAs, please?"
"I may or may not have developed a crush on her. I don't want to see her until I'm certain I'm no longer crushing on her."
"I knew you had feelings for your fuckbuddy!" Sarah exclaimed.
"It's just a silly crush." He reached for his beer and took a sip.
"You're avoiding her. It is most definitely not just a silly crush."
"It is. And, it'll never be more than a stupid crush," he firmly told her to which she frowned.
"Why, because you're a decade older than her?"
"It's not the age gap, it's her age. She's nineteen. She has a lot to learn from experiences, from mistakes, from life. We fooled around for a while and we moved on. I refuse to stand in her way." He was fine becoming a part of her past.
"Your logic is weird."
"It makes sense to me." He shrugged.
"You can go back to avoiding her after the ICCAs because we're going, baby brother."
"You go, I won't."
"You're going to support your friend."
"Am not."
"Jesse, we both know you can't not go. You're you."
"I'm taking the day off from myself tomorrow." She found herself rolling her eyes at his words.
He ended up going because being persistence is a Swanson thing, his sister would have dragged him if he didn't agree to go with her willingly.
They found seats on the third row and Jesse was able to spot a couple familiar faces there; Benji and Dr. Mitchell.
When the Bellas took the stage, he held his breath eyeing Beca. He internally groaned recognizing the feeling that washed over him and tried not to focus on it.
"Go, Beca!" Sarah hollered, catching Beca's attention who instantly found the source.
He wanted to physically hurt his sister for making his presence known to Beca but instead just smiled at the surprised brunette on the stage when he met her gaze.
When she smirked and met his gaze mid-performance, he arched an eyebrow in anticipation because he could tell just from her facial experience that she had something up her sleeves then shook his head in amusement when she began singing Don't You by Simple Minds.
They made out his couch then decided to hook up with no strings attached the last time he heard that song. If he didn't know better he would have thought she was serenading him because she wouldn't look away from his gaze. She couldn't be doing such thing of course. Don't You is a good song and she had him to thank for exposing her to it.
He threw his fist in the air when he noticed that she was waiting for him to do so and grinned when she threw hers in the air as well.
He could hear his sister mumble something next to him and could feel some eyes on him but he was preoccupied to figure out what Sarah was saying or give a fuck about those who were looking at him.
The Barden Bellas knocked it out of the park, and from his experience doing a cappella, he knew that their set was a winner. (The fact she used the song made famous by his all-time favorite movie wasn't in any way making him bias.)
He went to find her after the jury declared the Bellas winners and people began leaving the theatre. She was with her teammates, but when she saw him and Sarah walk towards her she excused herself and met them halfway.
"Why didn't you tell me you're coming?" she asked.
"I know you hate surprises so I figured I'd surprise you." He chuckled when she threw a weak punch that landed on his shoulder. He responded by wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her into his chest, hugging her quite tightly.
"Congrats, Beca, you guys killed it," Sarah said.
"Thanks," she grinned, her arm loosely wrapped around Jesse's waist as she leaned against him.
"So, care to explain why you decided to include a song made famous by a movie into your set, miss I-don't-like-movies?" he questioned.
She shrugged. "I found the soundtrack at the radio station and listened to it. 'Don't You' is pretty catchy and you made it quite clear that the ending of the movie is iconic therefore people would be all over it if I put it in our set," Beca explained.
He nodded in response, smiling down at her. "You basically figured you'd manipulate the audience by hitting them with a strong dose of nostalgia."
"The jury in particular because they are who decide who wins." Her words made him snort.
"Beca." The three tilted their heads, hearing Dr. Mitchell's voice.
Jesse pulled away from Beca completely as her father approach them accompanied by a familiar looking woman. It soon clicked in Jesse's head, figuring that she was Beca's mother Eliza.
"Beca, to say your team was amazing would be an understatement," the woman spoke, revealing her foreign accent that made Jesse wonder why Beca never mentioned the fact that her mother's Australian.
"Yeah, you really took the stage by storm," Dr. Mitchell beamed at his daughter before looking at Jesse. "Swanson," he called.
"Dr. Mitchell." Jesse smiled curtly at the older man who was eyeing Sarah whose eyes were glued to Eliza.
"Beca, aren't you going to introduce your friends?" Eliza questioned.
"Right," Beca nodded. "Eh, my friend Jesse," she gestured at Jesse. "His sister Sarah." She then gestured at Sarah. "My parents." She awkwardly motioned between the siblings and her parents.
Beca surely looked a lot like her mother, they still had a fair amount of different features but it was easy to tell that they're related.
"Pleasure meeting you," Jesse smiled, wondering if he should add ma'am then deciding not to because if he did his math right Beca's mother was barely a decade older than him and it'll probably offend her.
"Likewise." She shook his hand, eyeing him up and down. "So you're Jesse, huh?"
"Yep." He didn't know Beca told her mother about him. He wondered how much she told her. He did miss it when she raised an eyebrow the moment Beca introduced him and it made him worry slightly.
"I'm sure you get this all of the time but I gotta say you and Beca look like you could be sisters, not mother and daughter," Sarah marveled and was met by a soft laugh from the woman.
"You're too sweet," Eliza smiled curtly.
"Seriously, you don't look a day over thirty." Jesse wanted to roll his eyes because of his sister's flirty tone. While what she was saying was true, Beca's mother was indeed gorgeous and was aging really well, it didn't mean it was okay for his sister to flirt with the woman.
He decided to step in before she said something inappropriate, "Beca, how do you plan to celebrate the fact that the Barden Bellas made history tonight as the first all-female group to ever win the ICCAs?"
"The girls told me there's an after-party at the hotel where a cappella nerds are staying and since we won the other teams are going to foot the bill for our drinks," she informed.
"That's how it's always been." During his days as a Treblemaker, he never paid for a drink; the trebles were the kings of A cappella. "But you guys made history," he pointed out, smiling when Dr. Mitchell wrapped an arm around Beca's shoulder and pulled her into his side as he pecked her temples. His former professor was very proud of his daughter; it was nice to witness it.
"You know what, Becs," Dr. Mitchell began to say as he stuffed his hand into his pocket and pulled his wallet. "Here." He handed her a credit card. "Tonight is your night. Spend as much as you want."
"Seriously?"
"Yes, seriously." He nodded. "Rent a yacht and throw a party on it for all I care. Just don't end up in a jail cell by the end of the night," he joked to which Beca rolled her eyes while she fought off a smile.
"What your father is trying to say is don't do anything stupid," Eliza said, a little uncomfortable with the level of trust Dr. Mitchell had in Beca which was understandable—who in their right mind gave a 19-year-old unlimited access to their bank account?
"Don't worry," Beca assured her, smiling tightly at her mother. "Thanks, dad." She leaned up and kissed him on the cheek.
The look on Dr. Mitchell's face warmed Jesse's heart. He knew Beca didn't do that usually. He was beyond happy that their relationship was growing and hoped Beca's relationship with her mother would get better, too.
The mother and daughter still had a lot to work through; they were taking slow but steady steps.
Once Beca left to join her friends, the four parted ways awkwardly. Jesse had to pull Sarah away because she was starting to drool over Eliza. Eliza was looking at him weirdly. Dr. Mitchell seemed uncomfortable by the amount of staring and Jesse shared his discomfort.
"How old is Beca's mother?" Sarah asked as she and Jesse walked towards the entrance of the theatre.
"Forty," he told her.
"Damn, she's aging well," she murmured then frowned at the glare her brother shot her. "What?"
"Did you have to eye-fuck the woman?" Jesse grumbled as he his and his sister stood on the sidewalk waiting for a taxi.
"I can't help it, she's really hot! Besides, you know me and ladies with accents." Sarah shrugged. "And, don't you dare lecture me on eye-fucking you did plenty of that yourself tonight." He looked at her in confusion after whistling for a cab to stop.
"Oh, don't give me that look. You and your former fuck budd were practically undressing each other while she serenaded you. Dude, you made people sitting near you uncomfortable."
"That wasn't the case at all," he denied.
"That was very much the case. And, you can't pretend it's just a crush because it's not and it's not one-sided either." She stepped into the taxi first. "I thought she was going to kiss you when you hugged her…" she paused to give the taxi driver her address. "…that's how obvious that she's into you."
He decided to ignore what she said because it didn't matter even if it was true.
"Also, serenading you with your favorite song?" she snorted. "I didn't peg Beca as the big gesture type. It's cute but doesn't seem like her thing."
"She doesn't know it's my favorite song," he told her. "And, stop saying she serenaded me. You heard yourself why she went with the song."
"Whatever, man." She rolled her eyes.
Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, Jesse pulled it and found a text from Beca wondering he would join her and the Bellas and told him to bring his sister if she wanted to tag along.
His instinct was to agree right away but he knew he shouldn't be hanging out with Beca. Sarah was right it wasn't a silly crush and tonight confirmed it. He blew a breath, typed a reply and sent it out before changing his mind, telling her that he was a little tired and that his fight was early.
He had to do something drastic since it wasn't just him, he could deny it all he wanted but it was mutual even if Beca didn't seem to see it. He could imagine why she wouldn't: she was never in a relationship and never developed feelings for another person before, therefore, the whole thing was new to her.
"Hey, Sarah," he called, tilting his head to look at his sister who was gazing out of the window. "Remember how we decided that once I turned eighteen we'd go backpacking across the country? What happened to that?"
"Wow, you were like fourteen when we made that decision," she recalled. "Ugh, this makes me feel super old." She grimaced. "I believe we just forgot about it. What made you remember it?"
"I watched a movie where the protagonist goes backpacking."
The movie had been on his mind ever since he had seen it and the thought of going across the country with nothing but a backpack seemed very appealing given the fact that he wasn't very happy with the way his life turned out and was craving change. He wasn't brave enough to just drop everything and do it, having his sister with him would be the guarantee he needed to go through with it because Sarah Swanson never backed out of anything she agree to do.—he loved that about her and wished he had that quality.
"Wanna do it now?" he wondered.
"Now?" She looked at him in confusion.
"Well, not right now, obviously." He rolled his eyes. "But like in the near future. Summer break is approaching you'll get your ten weeks break. I'll go on leave. It'll be great to break the routine and meet new people."
She thought about it for a second. "Okay, fine, I'm in."
He didn't expect her to agree right away. "Awesome." He bumped his fist with Sarah's.
"I'd say we should probably check if Adam wants to join but the fucker has a pregnant wife to look after." She closed her eyes shut momentarily. "Shit, I wasn't supposed to say that."
"Adam slipped and told you, too?" he snorted.
"Yep," she affirmed.
Jesse scratched the stubble on his cheek as he thought about the adventure he had just talked his sister into and it was both scary and exciting.
AN: Hated it? Tolerated it? Let me know what you thought in a review.