Inspired by a French Duolingo story called 'L'agresseur' and a Tumblr text post about the Anti-Christ.
Written for Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
House: Thunderbird
Class/Task Number: Cultural Studies. 5. [Shopping] buying something pre-owned.
Bonus Prompts:
[emotion] confused
[action] getting mugged
Word Count: 2154/4500
Getting Mugged: Wizarding Style
Four instances of the witches and wizards we all love getting mugged by Muggles.
Harry couldn't sleep. He tossed and turned in bed as he attempted to silence his mind enough to fall asleep, but to no avail.
Finally, he decided to take a quick walk around the park, maybe then he would be able to go to sleep.
He slid out of bed, and pulled on his jeans and button-down shirt. He ran his hand through his messy hair and absentmindedly put his wallet into his pocket. He snuck down the stairs as he didn't want to wake Ron up. He slowly opened the door and left Grimmauld Place.
A park nearby was the perfect place for him to walk through, he decided. He jogged around the park a few times, but his mind still raced. He was worried about his upcoming Auror mission.
Ron and Harry, who were partners in the Auror Academy, had been assigned to bring in a rogue Dark wizard to justice. Even though Harry had defeated Voldemort, he knew it was sheer dumb luck and the efforts of his friends that had saved him again and again.
This time, he wouldn't have Hermione with him — he would only have Ron. And even though Ron was good at duelling, the truth was that Harry needed a partner who could think of the consequences of their actions. Harry had been a brash wizard in his teens, but now that he'd matured enough, he knew that he needed to be careful of his actions. One small misstep could wreak havoc.
He sighed as he decided he was tired enough to go back home and try to get some sleep. He trudged through the dark trees and found himself on the street opposite his house.
But before he could cross the street, a man, who'd been walking by, suddenly grabbed him by his collar and shoved him up against the tree. Harry took one look at the man and knew it was a Muggle.
At the Academy, they'd been taught how to recognize a Muggle from a wizard. It was simple enough — you needed to feel for their magic core. A wizard's magic core was always active; therefore, you could feel his magic thrumming inside him if you focused on it.
Harry didn't pull out his wand. He simply held his hands up and waited for the man to speak.
"Don't make any noise and I won't hurt you," the man snarled at him, one hand in his jacket's pocket pointed towards Harry.
"Is that a gun?" Harry questioned innocently.
"Do as I say and you won't have to find out," the man growled.
"Hand me all your money, now!"
"Okay," Harry said lightly, as he pulled out his wallet.
He'd never been mugged before, but he felt amused instead of worried. He decided to play along with the man.
"You know, it's been a long time since I've bought a new wallet," he said, conversationally, as he pulled out his wallet.
"What kind of wallet do you have, sir?" Harry asked the mugger.
"Give me the money!" The man snarled, his eyes red with rage.
Harry looked at what he had in his wallet. "Oh, look at this ticket! This is the movie ticket for the first movie I ever watched. I was just seventeen," Harry said excitedly as he showed the man the torn and worn ticket.
"I want your money!"
"Oh, look! It's my driving licence!" Harry exclaimed as he pulled out the small card. "Don't look at the picture, though. It makes me feel ashamed," Harry admitted sheepishly.
"Just give me your money," the man groaned, his eyes narrowed on Harry.
"Oh, and here it is; the receipt I was looking for!" Harry shook his head as he pulled out a paper.
"I bought some jeans, but they weren't the right size," he grumbled as he put the receipt back into his wallet.
"The money!" The mugger growled, his voice low and dangerous.
"Well, alright, let's see what I have," Harry said as he shifted the contents of his wallet around.
"Credit cards! Give me the credit cards!" The mugger cried quickly, when he noticed a couple of cards in Harry's wallet.
"What about this card? I get a stamp on the card every time I buy a kebab from The House of Kebabs. Do you want it?" Harry asked politely.
"No!"
"Are you sure? You only need two more stamps to get a free kebab, you know," Harry tried to persuade the confused man.
"Mate, just give me your money," the mugger moaned as his shoulders dropped in exasperation.
"May I hold the gun? I've never held one," Harry said.
"Don't force me to use it!"
"I've only seen guns in films," Harry said. "Is it heavy?"
"Give me your wallet or I'll make you regret it!"
"Hey, that's exactly what they say in the films!" Harry laughed. "What kind of gun is it?"
"Oh, forget it!" The mugger snarled before he turned around and started to walk away.
"Hey, what kind of gun was it?!" Harry called out after him.
"It was just my finger!" The mugger roared.
"Oh, okay then, but it was great speaking with you!" Harry waved at the man and walked back home, amused at the night's proceedings.
Ron walked down Old Kent Road, his hands in his pockets. He had an hour off for lunch, and he'd heard there was a good restaurant there.
As he turned the corner, a man shoved him into an alley and slammed him against the wall. Ron panicked and forgot he was a certified Auror.
"Wh–what do you want?" Ron cried out, scared.
"Give me all your valuables or you'll regret it!" The mugger spat at him.
"Mate, I'm poor as hell, I really don't have anything valuable on me," Ron pleaded.
"Give me that locket!" The mugger growled as he scuffled with Ron to yank the silver locket off.
"My girlfriend gave it to me — she'll kill me if she finds it's gone," Ron stammered out, terrified.
"It's mine now," the man sneered before he slammed Ron's head into the wall and rushed away.
"Lavender's going to kill me," he whispered as he rubbed the back of his neck.
Somehow, he avoided Lavender for the next couple of days. One evening, he decided to go to Diagon Alley to visit his brothers' shop.
As he ambled down the street, he caught sight of Mundungus Fletcher slinking into the shadows of Knockturn Alley.
A sudden plan formed in Ron's head. Mundungus might have something that he could give to Lavender. That way, she won't be too mad at him for losing her gift.
He called out, "Hey, Dung! Wait up!"
Mundungus paled when he saw Ron and stammered out, "I swear I'm not selling anything!"
Ron rolled his eyes and said, "Relax, Dung. I'm not here on Auror business. I want to see if you have something I could buy."
Mundungus looked at him suspiciously, but relented. He spread out his wares and asked, "Do you want anything specific?"
"Yeah, any lockets, necklaces, stuff like that," Ron explained.
"Sure, here." Mundungus showed him a variety of stolen necklaces and pendants.
Ron caught sight of a silver locket that seemed to resemble the one the mugger had stolen from him.
"Hey, that looks like my necklace!" Ron frowned, as he picked it up.
"Wh–what? No, it's not yours — a guy I know sold it to me legally," Mundungus blurted out, his eyes wide as he glanced at the necklace and then back at Ron.
Ron stared at the locket with a confused frown. His head spun because it looked exactly like his, but if Mundungus said that he'd bought it legally, then it couldn't be his necklace.
Ron slowly nodded and pulled out a few Knuts.
"Oh, no! It's worth 15 Sickles!" Mundungus lied immediately, but Ron didn't notice.
Questions still formed in his mind, but he ignored them, paid for the necklace and left the Alley.
Mundungus watched him leave and thought, 'How idiotic can you get?' He rubbed his hands wickedly, as he thought of the profit he'd just earned.
It had been such a good idea for him to join hands with that Muggle gang to earn profit by selling off their stolen Muggle items. He would have to congratulate Davis on robbing an Auror, though.
Hermione kept her arm wrapped around Ginny's waist as the two women walked home. Ginny was drunker than Trelawney on a bad day, while Hermione was just a bit tipsy.
As the two women stumbled down the street, they were unaware a man had followed them back from the pub.
As Ginny giggled and hiccoughed loudly, Hermione felt the presence of the man draw closer.
All of a sudden, the man had a knife pressed against Ginny's neck.
"Don't move, or your friend gets it," the man hissed through his yellowed teeth.
Before Hermione could reply, Ginny whirled around and punched the man's teeth in. The man howled with pain and dropped the knife.
Hermione watched with awe as Ginny grabbed the mugger's arms and yanked them behind him. With a swift kick to his groin, she had him sprawled face-first on the ground. The man screamed in pain as Ginny dropped down onto his back and refused to move.
"I'll just get the police," Hermione choked out through her tears of mirth as she hobbled away.
Bored, Fred and George decided to walk through Muggle London and find someone to prank. They Floo-called Lee and informed him of their plan. Lee immediately agreed, a devious grin on his face.
It took Lee only a couple of hours to get his costume ready. After he was done, he sent his Patronus to the twins. The twins grinned and quickly formed their plan.
That night, Fred and George, decked out in their brightest and most expensive Muggle clothes, ventured through the throngs of people near Piccadilly Circus.
As they sauntered through the crowd, they conversed at the top of their voice.
"John, do you think we should get rid of that new car we just bought?" Fred asked George.
"Sure, Shaun, we'll just give it to our watchman. He deserves it, doesn't he?" George replied.
"No, he deserves that penthouse we bought last month in Greater London," Fred said loudly as he passed by a group of four teenagers who looked at them carefully.
"But what about the maid? I thought we were giving the penthouse to her," George said with a small wink at Fred.
"No, I thought we decided we would be giving her the house in Aislaby," Fred called out loudly, as he winked back at his twin.
"Oh, well, we can just — " George was interrupted by the four teenagers who suddenly shoved them into a dark alley.
"Don't make a sound or we'll kill you," one of them snarled.
"Give us all the money you have on you!" Another boy growled.
In unison, Fred and George rolled their heads back and started to whip and flail their arms around wildly in elaborate patterns. The teenagers stumbled a little, bewildered at the scene.
The twins whipped their arms back and forth, and then dropped their heads to their chests. They slowly looked up and smiled creepily at the nervous teens.
"We call forth the Devil to help us," they hissed out as they flicked their tongues out quickly.
There was a sharp crack behind the teenagers. They whirled around and screamed with abject terror.
Behind them stood the Devil himself, a Hellfire-red trident in his hand.
One of the boys fainted on the spot. The other three bolted from the alley and left their unconscious friend behind.
"That was hilarious!" The twins cackled loudly as they walked over to the Devil.
"Great job on the costume, Lee," they said, as they clapped a hand on the broad-shouldered, half-naked man with Hellfire-red skin and curly dreadlocks.
"I am not Lee. You summoned the Devil himself," the man deadpanned.
Fred and George wavered as they looked at the man.
"Uhh," Fred started to panic when he saw the man move closer to them.
"Back off!" George cried as he brandished his wand.
"Humans need to give a sacrifice — or else I won't leave," the man hissed as he stepped even closer.
"What?! No! We didn't summon you!" Fred stammered, his terror rising.
The man did look horrifying enough to be the Devil, now that he thought about it. The same thought ran through George's mind.
"Guys, I can't believe you two got so scared!" The man burst into guffaws as he bent over double.
"LEE!" The twins yelled, disbelief etched on their faces.
"I actually managed to prank you both!" Lee cackled as the tears ran down his face.
"Lee!" The twins yelled as they ran after him, to the horror of the pedestrians nearby.
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