AN: Ernie gets the girl

An Earnest Ernest

Abigail went back to the furniture shop to find Jack. She needed to figure out a way out of this mess and she didn't know anyone else she could trust to tell her the truth at this point. Samantha was too good of friends with Ernest, his mother and her father had orchestrated what led to this entire mess, and bless his heart she loved Yonish but he'd just tell her to get married.

Jack was plaining something that looked like a bed rail. It wouldn't be until his next trip to his cabin before he'd realize the sturdy old bed of his grandparents that he used now had been made by his own hands as he'd never gotten to staining it. "Hi Abby." He said absently as he worked, not looking up.

"Jack… have yah got a moment?"

Jack looked up at her tone and saw her tear streaked face. "Abby?" He said softly with concern.

"Oh, Jack, it's just awful what they done and now I haven't got any choice in the matter and…" Abigail launched herself into Jack's sawdust covered arms and sobbed.

"'S all right. C'mere." He said gently and just held her while she cried. What the hell did they do to make her this upset, he wondered. She's not far along enough to be an emotional mess yet, is she?

Teal'c chose that moment to show up for lunch and raised an eyebrow at the situation before him. 'Go get Carter' Jack mouthed. Teal'c nodded and left.

Abigail calmed down a little finally but Jack continued holding her. "Think you can tell me what happened now?" He asked her gently.

She nodded miserably and swiped at her nose with her sleeve.

"Daddy had been doing poorly, having spells. Then he started suggesting I marry off. I told him I wasn't going to be held down by some man in my life but he kept on showin' me off to his widowed friends and their sons and any of the local farmers that weren't spoken for and whatnot. He kept on doin' it until I got so mad I told him Ernie done deflowered me ages ago. I swear it wasn't true, Jack. He'd only ever kissed me the once but Daddy had made me so mad I was willing to say anything to get him to quit trotting me out like a prized pony that had never known a man's touch." She huffed out a sigh.

"That's when you came to warn him, huh." Jack asked her.

"Why shore. Ernie is one of my best friends. I couldn't just let daddy shoot him because he made me mad enough to lie to shut him up."

Jack nods.

"But then his momma done showed up and asked me if I was with child and covering for another man and then Ernie said we should just get married to shut them both up and then we could go back to our own lives like nothing happened if we liked… but I…" She looked down, ashamed of herself.

"You encouraged him because of how you feel about him." Jack said gently.

"I swear I didn't mean to, Jack. He's my friend. It's not his fault how I feel and I didn't want to burden him with it. He doesn't want to be tied down." Abigail told him sadly.

Jack nodded thoughtfully. He knew otherwise but Ernest was probably fronting that he didn't want to be tied down because Abigail had expressed to him that she didn't want some lazy husband to take care of. And Ernest was at least as lazy as he was. Probably worse.

"And I'd set him free knowing what they done, Jack, but now…"

Jack hugged her shoulders gently. "It will be all right, Abby. Carter and I will figure something out." He reassured her.

"Samantha Carter, I am in need of your assistance." Teal'c told her.

Sam looked up from her work and sees Teal'c expression. "What's wrong? Is Jack-?"

"O'Neill is well. It is Abigail Steele I am concerned for." He tells her.

"Abby? What's wrong with Abby?" Ernest yelps with concern, popping his head up from under the quadrovelocipede that he'd christened a Range Rover.

"I am uncertain, Ernest Pratt, but she was quite inconsolable." Teal'c informed him.

Ernest scooted himself the rest of the way out from under the vehicle and headed for the door. "Well! Come on!" He barked at Sam and Teal'c.

Sam shrugged at Teal'c and followed him out. For a terrifying second, she'd worried Jack had been hurt at work so it was almost a relief to learn Jack's great-grandmother was just having a hysterical episode of some kind. Probably just something hormone related to her pregnancy but Jack and Teal'c both had experience with that kind of thing. Sam started to wonder what else might be going on as they all climbed into the working quadrovelocipede and sped off to town.

And as Jack thought of her, Sam showed up her eyebrows drawn together in worry… and behind her was Ernest. Teal'c stayed by the vehicle he too preferred to call a Range Rover.

"Carter." He greeted Sam simply and told her with his eyes he was all right but there was a rather odd situation.

Sam nodded and headed to Abigail but Ernest beat her there.

"Abby?" He said to her gently.

She turned to him and her face crumbled into fury again. "They tricked us!" she snarled.

Ernest was taken aback. "Ah… who tricked us?"

"That scheming father of mine and your mother. They tricked us and now you're stuck with a wife you never wanted and I…" Abigail hiccupped a sob and pushed though everyone to escape the work room.

Everyone stared after her in shock except Jack who stuffed a hand in his hair and sighed then gave Ernest a pointed look.

"Right." Ernest said firmly and marched out. "Abby! Wait!" he called after her.

"So what was that all about?" Sam asked Jack.

"Abby figured out what Delilah and Ethan did to get them to finally admit they love each other."

"Oh." Sam said and bit her lip with worry.

"Yah." Was all Jack said as he put his arm over Sam's shoulders.

Ernest followed the sound of sniffling to a bench around the side of the shop next to the woodworking store. "Abby." He said gently.

"Oh go away, Ernest. You don't have to pretend to protect my feelings anymore." She said miserably.

Ernest looks taken aback. "What?"

"I know you only asked because you thought it would help us both but it turns out our parents just schemed and plotted to get us together figuring no one wanted either of us anyway."

"Is that really what you think of me? That I'd only ask you to marry me to shut my mother up? I'm a grown man, Abby. I'm capable of telling my mother no."

"Shore you are but when was the last time you done it?" She challenged him.

"Well, that's not fair Abby. She hasn't asked me to do anything I didn't already want to in the first place."

"No, she just helped my daddy trick us both and I guess she got what she wanted out of it too." Abby huffed as she swiped away a tear.

Ernest sat next to her and hunched his shoulders dejectedly. "I see."

"Why… aren't yah mad at them, Ernest Pratt? Your own mother helped my daddy trick us both into something we didn't agree to in good faith."

But Ernest looked a little sick. "No Abby… I'm mad at myself for thinking…" Ernest squinted up into the sun though and didn't finish his sentence.

"I'm gonna go back to the Silver King and start packin' my things. They got what they wanted out of this. I imagine Henrietta will be happy to have you to herself again." Abby says as she stands. "I'm sore about it was me that caused you so much trouble, Ernest. If you want I'll send photos but if not, that's all right too. It ain't your fault they done this to us." Abigail got up and started to walk away but a hand shot out suddenly and grabbed her skirt and yanked her back down into his lap.

"Abigail Florence Steele, I want you to kiss me then tell me you don't feel anything when you did it." He told her, his lips so close he could feel the hitch in her breath. "Unless you're chicken, that is." He said with an amused grin.

"Ernie…" Her expression was confused. She'd released him from his unwanted obligation. Why was he doing this?

Ernest cupped her face gently with one hand and stroked his thumb over her cheek. "Abby… I didn't ask you to marry me because your dad threatened me or because my mom orchestrated the whole thing." He told her.

"You didn't?"

"No."

"But they—"

"Abby!" He gave her a small shake. "I asked you because it was probably the only chance I'd get that you'd have actually agreed to it. You don't need me, Abby, and heavens knows you can do better than me." He sighed. "But… Abby… I never brought up how I feel because you deserve better than me."

"Ernest… What are you saying?"

Ernest sighs heavily. "Not that it matters if you're determined to leave but I love you, Abby. I have for a while now but I didn't think you returned my regard and I know you deserve better than the kind of man I am so I didn't say anything about it until they came with their crazy plan to trick us."

"You knew?"

"No but I kind of suspected." He admitted. He hung his head a little. "Abigail Steele… I have a confession to make." He gave her a pleading look. "I knew how to keep you from getting pregnant. I've been doing it for years with other women. But I couldn't think of a single reason you would ever need me so I didn't take any precautions like I should have. I knew you didn't know anything about how to prevent a baby and I took advantage of you not knowing." Ernest sighed. "I'm just as much at fault as they are Abby and I'm sorry. I'll understand i— mpph"

Abby had ducked her head quickly and captured his lips before he could finish what he'd planned to say.

Several moments later their lips parted. "Why didn't you tell me when you started feeling this way?" She asked him.

"I told you. You don't need me, you can do considerably better. I'm a useless layabout most of the time who spends their money on liquor and card games and…" He looks into her eyes deeply. "And I couldn't see how a woman like you would ever love a man like me." He admitted.

"Well, Ernest Pratt, haven't we just been a pair of old sillies."

He looked at her with both confusion and inquiry.

"I've felt the same way for some time but I knew how you didn't want to settle nowhere or be tied down with a family yah didn't ask for so I didn't tell yah how I felt." She admitted.

"I'm starting to understand why our parents took matters into their own hands." Ernest admitted.

Abby nodded. "Suppose we should go thank them." She said with a small sigh.

"Nope." He disagreed. "We're going to act like we're only going through with it for the sake of the baby."

"Why, Ernie, that's terrible."

"I know." He said with a wicked grin and eyebrow wiggle that made her laugh.