(A/N: Hello! I am back for a little. I just hope this is kinda comprehensible because writing this at 5 am after being awake for a full 24 hrs means I'm probably loopy. ANYWAY, if you made it here, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoy! :D)

Chapter One

Gustatory Cells

I finish up the last few bites of surprisingly appetizing food goo on my plate. I'm getting used to the stuff, but I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Hunk's Earth-food enhancements to it are definitely helping, though.

Taking a sip of my chocolate milkshake, courtesy of Kaltenecker and Hunk's kitchen razzle dazzle, I glance around the long banquet table. Allura sits at the head (it is her castle, after all); Coran is at her left with the Blades and Slav on that side; Shiro is at her right with the other Paladins and myself across from our allies, although Allura still doesn't seem to see them as such. I find myself between Keith, who's picking at the fluorescent slime on his plate with a frown, vanilla milkshake untouched, and Hunk, who's got a whipped cream mustache from downing his strawberry milkshake to the halfway point in the glass.

"So what are Galra food customs like, Antok?" Hunk asks. "The only Galra food I've really tried was Vrepit Sal's at the Space Mall. We went not too long ago, and, honestly, they had a lot of potential, but there were some… reforms that made their food more appealing to customers. But is traditional Galra food actually like Vrepit Sal's or is that like the McDonald's of Galra food?"

"Uh… McDonald's?" The Blade's face oozes confusion. I assume that one is Antok.

"Oh! Sorry, fast food. McDonald's is, like, the biggest fast food franchise on Earth."

"Wait, it is?" Keith interjects.

I gape at him, my eyes as wide as the teludav. "Holy quiznak, Mullet, please don't tell me you haven't been to McDonald's."

"What?!" He narrows his eyes at me and crosses the sculpted arms hidden by his signature red, cropped jacket across his chest. "I assure you, I have been to McDonald's!"

"And that sounds like the tone of someone who can't bear to admit that I'm right~!" I sing. "How have you not been to McDonald's!" This was just great! One thing I have above Keith! (Aside from height, ha!)

He scowls. "I have been to McDonald's! I just didn't know they were the biggest fast food place."

"Sure you have, and sure you didn't," I snicker.

"What is it gonna take for you to quit being such an ass!"

"Keith!" Shiro scolds. "Language!"

He huffs. "And I had their chicken nuggets, a Big Mac, and a McFlurry once. Ask. Shiro."

An exasperated sigh pushes past our leader's lips. "Lance, he's been to McDonald's. I took him a few days after he got into the Garrison."

"Only once?!" I put my arm around his shoulders, grinning. "Dude, you have got to get out more."

He whacks my arm. "Well, there isn't exactly a McDonalds in the middle of nowhere!"

A quaint, wooden house with sheet-covered windows and cracked plaster walls surrounded by miles of sand flashed across my mind. Right. That was Keith's house.

"We're getting you some McDonald's when we get back to Earth," I say, grinning.

Mullet rolls his eyes at me.

His seemingly light-hearted comment from earlier distracts me from the ongoing cultural discussion Hunk is facilitating.

"You realize once we defeat Zarkon, the universe won't need Voltron anymore," Shiro pointed out, glancing at us.

"We can return to Earth," I said, looking out onto the Olkarion sunset.

"I can look for my family," Pidge added.

"I guess I could look for mine," Keith input.

I guess I could look for mine. I absentmindedly sip my milkshake, the rich, saccharine flavor reminding me of home. He didn't have his family with him. That explains why it was so empty and cold at his place despite its placement in a sweltering environment. My rival aside, it was deserted. He was living there alone. That just didn't sit right with me.

"What exactly is this?" One of the other Blades next to Antok asks gesturing toward his chocolate shake. I swear, these names never stick with me.

"It's called a milkshake! It's a popular dessert drink on Earth," Hunk says proudly.

"It's quite unlike anything I've ever tasted. It's sweet and salty and sour and even a little spicy, but it somehow works together. It's delicious."

"Salty?" My buddy looks at me, wondering if he messed up the shakes for the chocolate.

I shrug. "It's all sweet to me. Maybe our taste buds are different?"

Pidge whips around from the conversation with Slav with sparkles in her eyes. "Holy quiznak! So taste buds do vary from species to species! That is SO FUCKING COOL!"

"Pidge!" Shiro gives her a pointed look.

"Sorry." I smirk. She is sooo not sorry.

The scientist strokes his beard. Or at least I think it's a beard. This alien body stuff is getting really confusing. I can barely keep our resident half-Galra paladin's traits straight. "The probability of our taste buds registering different things with one particular food item is not completely without basis in this reality."

Keith sits up in his chair. "So how does chocolate taste to you, Regris?"

"It's sweet and spicy. A little like a Baltz fruit if you get me."

The other Blades nodded in agreement.

My face lights up. "Spicy!" If anything other than sweet, I would've expected them to find it bitter since straight cacao does tend to be so. But then again, I also don't know what kind of chocolate Hunk used so there could have been some pepper or cinnamon or something in it. Maybe the Galra taste buds are just more acute to what's already there. "And the whipped cream?"

"Thick and salty, I'd say."

I pressed my lips together, trying, but failing miserably, to stop myself from bursting into fucking giggles.

Pidge catches my eye then a shit-eating grin magically appears on her face. "So thick that you'd have to suck really hard to get it, then?"

"Not that thick but close to it," Regris says.

My eyes catch Ketih's as he cracks the first smile I've seen from him today. "You guys suck." He shakes his head as if washing his hands of us.

"What position are you in to say that? Don't you swallow?" I retort with a smirk.

Pidge is laughing her ass off.

"Wha-" He goes red. "Fuck you, Lance!"

"We all know you want to~"

Hunk chokes on his drink, leading to a coughing fit. His face flushes. "Really? In front of my food goo?"

Keith shoves a bird into my face as I laugh.

Shiro smacks his palm into his face in agony. "I'm so sorry. Apparently, they need a refresher on basic etiquette."

Utter confusion droops like syrup all over the alien population of the room.

"Was it something I said?" the unsuspecting Blade asks.

"Yes, Shiro, please enlighten us," Coran says.

"No-uh, it's nothing!" our leader tries to cover.

Allura quirks an eyebrow at him. "It doesn't look like nothing." Oh, nobody taint her chaste mind!

"Absolutely nothing you need to worry your pretty little head about," I say, making finger guns at her.

She frowns.

"They're just some inappropriate Earth jokes," Hunk tattles, waving us off nonchalantly. "Ignore 'em."

I turn back to Regris, a polite smile back in place. "Sorry, we're good now. Please, continue your description. Don't let us stop you."

"Um…"

Hunk smiles encouragingly. "Go ahead, they're just being a bunch of idiots."

He looks unsure of himself but continues, "Well, the small, red thing—I think you call it a cherry on Earth—is just very tart. Slightly bitter, too, but it's good. It mixes well with the rest of it."

"Oh, I see! To us, this type of cherry is extremely sweet. You'll usually find it on milkshakes, like this one, and this other dessert called a banana split. It's kind of similar, but more… solid, I guess," my buddy explains.

"If it's anything like milkshakes, I'm sure it's scrumptious!" Allura chimes, her eyes gleaming in cotton candy hues. My heart squeezes a little. That's so cute!

"I mean, I can make some for tomorrow's dinner if everyone's okay with that. I mean, I probably should before the bananas I got turn bad."

"That's a delectable idea!" Coran adds. I can't shake how I always think of Sherlock whenever the Alteans talk. I don't know if smoking was ever a thing on Altea, but I could totally picture Coran with a pipe.

"Yes! Banana splits! Hunk, have I mentioned that I love you?" Pidge beams.

"Yes. Many times," Hunk laughs, scratching the back of his head.

"That actually sounds pretty good," Keith says, the corners of his lips quirking up. His grayish, amethyst eyes catch the light as the corners of his eyes crinkle like the surface of snickerdoodles. I find that much better than the sullen mood he'd been in all day.

"What is the taste like to you, Alteans?" Slav asks. "Is it similar to what the Galra experience? Well, a being as great as I, for one, finds the majority of this drink treacly."

The conversation about alien taste buds and milkshakes continues. I catch bits and pieces like sweet and bitter and savory, but my eyes wander to Keith. I wonder how it's all like to him. He's been born and raised on Earth, and I'd thought that, the emo part aside, we'd just had a ton in common as two pilots gunning for the same position in the Garrison, but could everything have been different all along starting from the most basic sense of taste? Does he feel the same sensation we do since he's half human? How much does a half of Galra blood affect him? It might be a little silly of me, but do milkshakes really taste the same to him, or is it something he's enjoyed as something different like what the Blades said about it? I don't know, maybe it's even completely different from the other Galra?

The slightest movement of his head to my direction makes me whip around to find my free-of-food-goo plate the most interesting thing in the room right now. I wait until I know he's turned around before I look up again, but my eyes see my reflection in purple tones.

"You know I can feel you staring at me, right?" he deadpans.

I tap my index fingers together and look back toward Hunk, waiting for Keith to entertain me. "Nooooo?"

When I look back, Mr. Mullet doesn't seem convinced. "What is it?"

I grin gleefully. "So, about what they were talking about just now, do you taste the same thing we do or what the Blades do? You know, cuz you're human."

He pauses, perplexed.

In the split second I realize I may have overstepped my bounds, guilt pumps through my heart as it did after the incident with Veronica. I wave my hands in front of me. "Sorry! I didn't mean anything by it. It's fine if you do-"

He slaps my hands down, eye twitching. "Lance, it's okay. Seriously, it's not like you guys have to walk on eggshells around me." He lets out a sigh. I don't know if I'm tripping or not, but his eyes seem to soften. "I mean, it's never occurred to me until now that I've been different from everyone else in terms of my humanity. I kinda assumed my sense of taste was the same as everyone my whole life," he says with a shrug. He dips the cherry further into the whipped cream then slips it into his mouth, popping the stem off in the process. After chomping down on it, he takes a sip of his milkshake. His pink tongue darts out to lick the traces of cream on his lips. I don't know why I feel slightly awkward watching him eat or why there's a slightly stronger thumping in my chest. "Not like I had anyone to compare with back on Earth, but I guess it doesn't really taste much like what Regris was describing besides the cherry since it's kinda sour. I'm gonna assume it's the same as you guys. It's sweet as can be."

"Oh, okay then." A smile reaches my lips as I brush off the earlier uneasiness. "I guess you're more normal than I thought, Mullet."

He rolls his eyes. "Dumbass."

I stick my tongue out at him before drinking more of my milkshake.

Keith smirks and looks me dead in the eyes. "Not that I would know, but, with you being the normal human and all, I should be the one asking if your milkshake tastes like semen."

The liquid goes down the wrong pipe and sends me hacking. My eyes water as I cover my coughing with my elbow, glaring at my hysterical rival. "I hate you," I rasp.

Hunk turns my way and hands me a glass of water. "You okay there, buddy? Don't drink too fast."

I frown. "I'm good, thanks."

"Wouldn't want you to choke on fluids," Keith snorts.

I down the blessed H2O then slam the cup down on the table like my uncles do with the beer on holidays. Squinting at him, I lightly punch him in the arm, which only makes him laugh harder. "I quiznaking hate you."

Pretty sure Allura, Coran, and Shiro are chastising me for my word choice at the table, but I'm not hearing a word they say over Keith's guffawing.

"Te odio, pero te ríes bien."

I can almost see the question marks over his head, but it doesn't stop his joyful hysteria. He's easily gone from the most morose person in the room to the most exuberant, and I can't say I'm not happy about that.

I shrug off the frown, and my own goofy smile makes its way back to my face. I hop over to our favorite green paladin. "Yo, Pidge, you still got your playlist hooked up to the castle?"

"Yeah, why?"

"It's milkshake day." If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
We exchange troll faces then she types into the green screen on her hack-y watch thing before an energetic conga beat fills the room in surround sound. Multi-colored lights drop down from the ceiling, and the lights dim. Disco lights. Very nice touch. Pidge jumps out of her chair.

"MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD!" we scream while flailing our limbs about. "AND THEY'RE LIKE," I point at Keith, and Pidge points at Hunk, "IT'S BETTER THAN YOURS!"

Hunk gets up and joins us while Mullet's in stitches. "DAMN RIGHT, IT'S BETTER THAN YOURS!" he bellows, pointing at Allura and Shiro.

I catch the Alteans in the corner of my eye as I snag a scoopful of Hunk's homemade whipped cream into my hand incognito. Allura's jaw has dropped, appalled, while Coran is speechless for once. I see him mutter something to Shiro, probably about Earthling behavior, and our fearless leader, for lack of better words, looks done with our meme-worthy glory, but he's probably expected this much from us anyway. I swear, there was a handprint on his face from his face-palming. The Blade of Marmora members have the most priceless expressions on their faces as they're at a loss for what to do. Slav just looks stunned. Nonetheless, the paranoid genius joins us in dancing with all 8 arms.

"There is a 99.667% chance that this Earth ritual will save this reality!" he says through the blaring music.

I dance over to Mullet and smush the delicacy into his face while he's distracted by Slav. "I CAN TEACH YOU, BUT I HAVE TO CHARGE!"

His wide-eyed face is covered in creamy, white goodness, but it's somehow endearing. "You did not just do that!" His gloved hand reaches for the bowl.

"Oh, yes, I did!" I cackle. I start running cuz I know he'll stop at nothing until the bowl's contents are dumped on me.

"You are so dead, Lance!" I glance behind me. Keith's running after me with a competitive grin.

I dash past Pidge and Hunk, eventually using Pidge as a shield to Keith's Cool Whip shots. Allura and Shiro eventually join us (because even a princess and an officer are not exempt from a good food fight) while the adults (i.e. Coran, the Blades, and Slav) step out of the crossfire. I run in circles around the table since Pidge is after me now, too.

Even though I'm running from the horrors of getting whipped cream stuck in my beautiful, well-maintained hair, I'm content. Within the chaos of Milkshake and food fights, the foggy tension has dissipated, and everyone seems to be enjoying themselves.

Splat!

"Agh, my hair!"

I spoke too soon. Everyone except me.

Like, a second later, Pidge slaps me with more whipped cream, smugness written all over her face.

"Look alive, sharpshooter," Keith says, tears in his eyes from losing it.

I find myself bursting into laughter at how ridiculous we all look. I suppose I'd be fine with goop in my hair if it meant seeing my space family smile, though. They're all I've got out here, after all.