Vita Nova (The New Life)

by Indian Summer 2378

After Voyager reaches Earth, Starfleet appoints a hearing to decide the Doctor's fate. While Kathryn and her crew are working hard on making sure that he'll leave it as a free individual, they get help from an old friend of hers. Written for Mia's Meat Raffle 2020.

I wrote this story for Mia's Meat Raffle, where people could donate money for the victims of the Australian bushfires (god, that seems ages ago!) and win a story. My recipent was the ever patient arcadia75, who requested a Mark/Chakotay friendship story. She also suggested the plot for the story.

As always, I have to thank you, KJaneway115. I would be lost without your help! Additional thanks goes to Koneia, who pushed me when I needed it, and more importantly, always had an open ear. You, Ladies, are the best.

---

Slowly, Voyager rounded Earth. Not able to tear her eyes away, Kathryn stood at her ready room window, gazing at her blue home planet. The sight was soothing and exactly what she needed.

For hours she talked to numerous admirals at Starfleet Command, officers of the Pathfinder Project and other members of Starfleet, including Starfleet's commander in chief. All had wanted to congratulate her and tell her how proud and happy they were that she had achieved the impossible.

Kathryn wasn't able to share their happiness. Their sudden homecoming was still too unbelievable, too unreal, and she could not in the slightest comprehend that they were indeed back.

Her crew felt the same and the atmosphere aboard Voyager was strangely odd. Everyone was having trouble coping with the new situation and no one knew what to think about it. There had been too many times that they'd been very close to getting home but had failed, so it seemed too good to be true that they actually done it.

The wariness would give way once they set foot on Earth, Kathryn thought, although she didn't like the prospect of leaving Voyager. For seven years, the ship had been their home, the center of their family, and Voyager was as much a part of it as any crewmember.

She knew she should feel different, but she couldn't help it. Voyager brought them home and the awareness that once they departed, nosy engineers would dissect the ship to gain knowledge of the new technology was hard to take.

She had to get used to that thought, she told herself, just like she had to get used to the thought that her crew would spread out of her reach quickly. It was the natural course of action, they wouldn't stay together forever, and the news she had received earlier only supported that truth.

It was no one less than Starfleet's commander in chief who told her that all the Maquis were pardoned, as well as the Equinox crew and Tom. That meant that they were free; free to live their lives.

Including Chakotay.

Losing her best friend would be the biggest blow. He knew her inside out, had seen her at her best and her worst; he was her rock, her counsel and there wasn't one single being she trusted more than him.

It would be painful not seeing his face every day, not hearing his calming voice in the midst of trouble. His absence would leave a hole in her soul.

She didn't want that to happen, and her own words from all those years ago came back to her. Three years ago I didn't even know your name. Today I can't imagine a day without you. Those words were still true. She couldn't imagine a day without him, she didn't want to imagine a day without him. It would be hard enough not seeing the others every day, but without him, her life would be empty.

What did that mean, she asked herself. Was he more than just her best friend and first officer? Did the feelings she once had still exist?

Tiredly, she rubbed her face with both hands. Her mind was a mess and she couldn't think straight. The past few days had left her an emotional wreck and she didn't know how to feel, what to feel. It simply was too much and she needed time to clear her mind and sort out her emotions.

She hoped she had that time regarding Chakotay, because she couldn't stop thinking about her older self's words. Seven of Nine is going to die. In the arms of her husband. Chakotay.

Not only did Seven die way too early in the admiral's timeline, but Kathryn had never, ever, envisioned a liaison between the two of them. They had their fair share of difficulties in the beginning and she had never seen them close enough to start a relationship. It must've been quite a change for Admiral Janeway watching them growing closer together. How it must've been marrying them, Kathryn didn't even want to imagine.

Hearing any of Admiral Janeway's stories rattled Kathryn and she was glad that she and her crew were given a second chance; a chance to live in the Alpha Quadrant.

Chakotay told her on various occasions how much he would love to settle on Earth and teach at the Academy if he ever got the chance to. It suited him perfectly.

Would she be satisfied living on Earth, having a desk job and coming home at the same time every single day of the week? Or did she, after seven years, still need the excitement of first hand exploration?

She didn't know yet either, but under no circumstances would she give away the chance her older self gave her. She would find her way, no matter how difficult.

Her console beeped, informing her of an incoming transmission, and she sighed. She would love to have a minute to herself, to let everything sink in, to visit the newest member of their family in sickbay, but it seemed as if that was impossible.

Reluctantly, she walked to her desk.

It was Admiral Hayes. Again.

"Yes, Admiral?"

"Captain, I've received news of some urgency."

"What is it?"

"I know you and your crew are eager to depart but we have to discuss the future of one of your crew members first."

Kathryn tensed up. She didn't expect anyone to have a problem with Seven of Nine.

"Your EMH." Admiral Hayes cut Kathryn's thought short.

"The Doctor?" Kathryn frowned.

Hayes nodded, solemnly. "We have to decide what'll happen with him."

Perplexed, Kathryn didn't know what to say. "Admiral…"

"He isn't on trial, Captain," Hayes clarified, raising his hands. "We will merely have a hearing."

"A hearing?"

"To discuss his future," he repeated.

"Because he's a hologram," she realized, gravely.

It wasn't a question, but Hayes answered nonetheless. "Yes. Normally the EMH program would be deactivated and stay in the ship's computer until it's decided whether it's going to be updated or replaced by a newer model."

"The Doctor is no ordinary EMH," Kathryn said, gritting her teeth.

"That's why he's been granted a hearing."

How generous, Kathryn thought but held back. Sarcasm wouldn't lead anywhere.

"The hearing is set for tomorrow morning, 0800 hours. Afterwards, your crew is clear to depart."

Kathryn sucked in her breath. Clear to depart. Clear to leave Voyager, and if Admiral Janeway's timeline was any indication, for good.

"Understood," she said, hoarsely, her mouth suddenly dry.

The admiral gave her a simple nod. "Hayes out."

The symbol of the Federation appeared and Kathryn swallowed past the lump in her throat. Being ordered to leave Voyager was causing a stronger emotional response than she had expected and she was having trouble keeping her emotions in check.

She had no time to be emotional now, she told herself. The Doctor needed her help, without him they wouldn't have gotten home, and he deserved to depart as a free individual.

Pulling herself together, she straightened and tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Chakotay."

"Chakotay here."

"Would you please come to my ready room?"

"On my way."

Only seconds later, he pushed the chime and entered.

"Captain?" he asked, puzzled, when he saw her worried face.

"We have a problem."

Concerned, he sat down. "What is it?"

"Starfleet has appointed a hearing… to discuss the Doctor's future."

His eyebrows rose and he opened his mouth but closed it again, not knowing what to say.

"I know what you think," she said.

"To be honest, I didn't expect anyone to have a problem with the Doctor."

"Me neither, but we should've known better."

He nodded, slowly, thinking about the last time the Doctor was in contact with the Alpha Quadrant. It was only a couple of weeks ago, when he wanted to publish his holonovel. "It's just about him being a hologram?"

"I'm afraid so."

"When will that hearing be?"

"Tomorrow morning, 0800 hours."

His eyes widened. "That soon?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"Does he have legal counsel?"

"I'll do it, though I would feel better if Tuvok was still here and could do it."

"He has a knack for it, but you can do it just as well," he reassured her.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I'm not so sure."

He leaned on the table, closer to her. "If it makes you feel any better, we could reread Tuvok's thoughts and arguments from the arbitration."

"We?" She raised an eyebrow.

"You don't have to do this alone, Kathryn. I'll help you and I'm sure many of the crew are willing to fight for the Doctor's rights as well."

"Of course they would," she couldn't help but smile. The group of mismatched people that was her crew stood together when it mattered.

Feeling Chakotay's eyes on her, she looked at him and saw him watching her.

"How are you, Kathryn?" he asked, softly.

"I'm fine."

He laid his head to the side, not believing her.

She didn't blame him, because she didn't believe it either. Sighing, she rubbed her face with one hand. "To be honest, I don't know what to feel. Everything is so…"

"Seven of Nine to Chakotay."

Seven's voice cut through the peaceful atmosphere like a knife, and, wide-eyed, Kathryn stopped short.

"I'm sorry," Chakotay flinched, his face flushed, and tapped his combadge. "Yes, Seven?"

"Could you please join me in the cargo bay, I wish to talk to you."

Clearly uncomfortable, Chakotay shifted in his seat and stole a glance at Kathryn. "I'm sorry, Seven, but I have to work."

"Oh," she paused. "Perhaps if you could spare some time later…?"

"Of course. I'll come down as soon as I can. Chakotay out."

"Go," Kathryn said, more harshly than intended when Chakotay closed the connection.

"No. You wanted to say something."

"It's not important. Go."

His heart sank. Just when Kathryn was about to open up to him, Seven had to call.

"I have to go to sickbay and inform the Doctor anyway," Kathryn insisted. "That way I can visit the newest addition to our family."

He searched her face, making sure she meant what she said. "You're sure?"

"Yes," she nodded.

He took one lasting glance at her, contemplating if he should really leave and noticed, sadly, that she wouldn't talk to him now anymore anyway.

With hanging shoulders, he rose. "After I talked to Seven, I'll assemble the troops."

"Thanks."

She watched him leave and stared at the doors after they closed behind him, trying to process what she just witnessed. When her older self told her about Seven and Chakotay's upcoming marriage, she hadn't assumed they were already seeing each other. Neither Seven nor Chakotay had told her, but the guilty look on Chakotay's face had spoken volumes.

The fact that they had already started their relationship changed everything, and Kathryn realized that her earlier thoughts were in vain. She hadn't had time to think about her feelings for Chakotay, she lost the chance to be with him at all.

Something between a sigh and a sob emerged from her throat and a wave of loneliness washed through her. Not in a million years had she seen that coming and she wished she could leave now.

Of course that was impossible. Aside from the Doctor needing his captain, she had an obligation to stay until everyone else left. Only then she could finally go to Indiana to stay in the quiet solitude of her childhood home and spend some much needed time with her family.

Right now, however, she had her job to do.

Gathering strength by taking a deep breath, she stood and went to sickbay to talk to the Doctor.

=/\=

With an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach, Chakotay walked to cargo bay two. He had no idea what Seven wanted to talk about, but hoped it wasn't what he thought it might be.

When Voyager returned to the Alpha Quadrant, he had realized with a pang of remorse that this wasn't the homecoming he imagined. Far from it, it was all wrong and that was his fault.

Throughout their journey, he had a clear vision of how their homecoming should look like. It was full of bliss and happiness; for them all, but for him personally because he finally wanted to tell Kathryn how he felt about her. In his imagination, she always reciprocated his feelings and they lived happily ever after.

That dream had helped him through many troubled times and lonely nights. It had helped him stay hopeful and do his job. He couldn't recall why and when he stopped dreaming it.

It must've been a couple of months ago. He'd spent less and less time with Kathryn, it was almost as if she was withdrawing from him intentionally, and he felt terribly lonely. The days got longer and drearier, and for a nanosecond he lost all hope of ever getting home and that was enough to say yes to Seven's invitation.

He should've known better than to stop believing in Kathryn. She kept her promise and, although unconventional, brought them home.

As he sat at the helm and Earth appeared on Voyager's viewscreen, he became aware of the mess he'd made. He could never be with Seven in the Alpha Quadrant.

He went to talk to her at the first quiet moment and even if he felt bad for disappointing her, he stuck to the truth and told her that he had no feelings for her. When she told him that she didn't have feelings for him either, he was relieved beyond measure and they decided there and then that it would be best if they stopped dating.

He felt much better afterwards and a little spark of hope kindled in his belly. Perhaps there was a chance that his dream wasn't over; perhaps there was still a chance to mend fences with Kathryn.

His hope was short lived. She would never forgive him what he had done. The betrayed look on her face when Seven called was too shockingly obvious. He had hurt her. Deeply.

He wanted to tell her everything, ease her pain, but Kathryn had a way of shutting people out and then every argument was pointless. He had to wait until she was in the mood and would listen to him so he could at least try to save their friendship. There was nothing else he could do.

He arrived at the cargo bay and, roused by the opening doors, Seven looked up from the computer terminal. She appeared unusually disconcerted and he hoped she wasn't having second thoughts regarding ending their liaison.

"Seven?" he asked, concerned. "Is everything all right? Your call sounded urgent."

"You have experience with human emotions," she stated without preamble.

He crossed the cargo bay and couldn't help but smirk. "You could say that."

"They are erratic, illogical."

"Sometimes."

"Then I guess it was the wrong choice having the fail-safe device extracted."

Glad that she didn't regret their decision, he relaxed and focused on helping her. "What makes you say that? Are you having difficulties?"

"Yes. I catch myself being preoccupied and I can't concentrate on my work."

"Do you know the reason why?"

"It's because I am feeling unsettled."

"You're experiencing deep emotions for the first time. It's absolutely normal to be unsettled."

"It is not the extraction of the fail-safe device that unsettles me, it's being back in the Alpha Quadrant."

"I see," he nodded. "Did you talk to Captain Janeway about this?"

"No."

"Why not? She has helped you through many difficult situations."

Seven hesitated. "I didn't tell her about the procedure beforehand."

"Talk to her. She'll understand."

Seven nodded. "I'll do that. Thank you."

"We will always be there for you, Seven," he reassured her. "And you can talk to me any time you want."

She smiled a small grateful smile. "The last couple of weeks weren't in vain."

"Oh?"

"We got to know each other better. I now consider you a close friend."

His face broke into a smile. "Likewise. Now, if you feel up to it, we could use your help," he got back to business.

"Regarding?"

"Starfleet has arranged a hearing to decide what's going to happen to the Doctor."

Her perfect brows knitted. "The Doctor?"

"It seems as if Starfleet wants to find out whether he's 'just' a hologram."

"Of course he is not."

"We know that."

"Starfleet should consider itself lucky to have him," she emphasized.

"That's what we have to tell them."

Seven didn't respond and Chakotay saw that she was trying to deal with uprising emotions. "What are you feeling?"

"Anger."

"That's a perfectly normal response. He's your friend."

"How can Starfleet be that short sighted?"

"I wouldn't call it short sighted. The Doctor is the first hologram that exceeded its programming. Now Starfleet has to decide how to deal with the situation. Our job is to help our friend."

"I will do whatever I can."

"Good." He nodded once. "We'll have a senior staff meeting in a couple of minutes. Let's get to the briefing room."

=/\=

Meanwhile Kathryn exited the turbolift on deck five. She had no idea how the Doctor would react to the news about the hearing, but hoped he wouldn't take it personally. It wasn't his fault that he was a hologram and he hadn't done anything wrong.

She triggered the door and the sight that greeted her, stopped her in her tracks. The Doctor stood next to the biobed B'Elanna laid on, scanning the baby in her arms as Tom hovered above her.

"Is everything all right?" Tom asked.

"Perfectly." The Doctor closed the tricorder and tapped Miral's nose.

"When will you release me from sickbay?" B'Elanna wanted to know as she settled Miral into a more comfortable position.

"In the morning."

She and Tom exchanged a glance. "You will survive one night in sickbay," he assured her.

"Will I survive it, too?" the Doctor asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm, as he laid the tricorder away.

Tom patted his shoulder. "I'm only one call away." He looked at Miral. "I'm not going anywhere soon."

He couldn't resist stealing his daughter from his wife and as he scooped her up in his arms, he saw Kathryn standing at the doors. "Captain! What a nice surprise."

Smiling, Kathryn joined them. "Congratulations," she said and couldn't take her eyes off the baby. "She's adorable."

"Thank you," the new parents smiled proudly and Miral made a cooing sound that tugged at Kathryn's heartstrings.

"How are you, B'Elanna?" Kathryn asked and laid a hand on B'Elanna's shoulder.

"All right." B'Elanna sighed and shifted. "A little strained."

Kathryn nodded and squeezed her shoulder lightly. "Now you have time to rest."

"That's still unbelievable. I expected to be back on duty within weeks, if not days if something arose."

"I know. But now you can fully concentrate on your family. Voyager will be taken care of at Utopia Planitia."

"I don't know if I like that better."

Kathryn smiled. "Me neither. It's hard to imagine someone other than you responsible for Voyager's systems. You're a remarkable engineer, B'Elanna, and we were lucky having you in engineering."

"Thank you, Captain," B'Elanna said, touched. "I know I didn't make it easy for you, especially in the beginning."

Kathryn waved dismissively. "Long forgotten."

They exchanged a smile and Kathryn looked at Miral who was quite satisfied in her father's arms.

"You want to hold her, Captain?" Tom asked.

Kathryn was tempted. "Perhaps later. I have something else to do first." She looked at the Doctor and felt bad for having to spoil the mood. "Would you please join me in your office?"

Uncertain about the sudden change, the Doctor looked from one to the other. "Sure."

They left the small family and Kathryn gestured at his chair behind the desk. "Please sit down."

"Captain? Is something wrong?" he asked as he sat down.

"I don't know yet."

Her behavior worried him and he frowned.

"Starfleet has appointed a hearing to decide what'll happen to you."

"And I thought I was nominated for the Daystrom prize," he joked, trying to ease the tension he felt.

Kathryn leaned forward. "For this crew and me, you're as real as anyone made of flesh and blood, and I will do anything in my power to ensure that you'll leave Voyager as a free individual."

"I know you'll give your best, Captain," he said, soberly.

"You deserve the right to be free. We wouldn't have made it home without you," she said, dead-serious.

"I am grateful for everything you did to make me feel like a member of the crew and an independent being."

"I needed to be convinced…" she admitted, thinking of Kes, "…and now we have to convince Starfleet."

He nodded, glad for having such a resourceful captain.

"We should go," Kathryn said and rose. "Chakotay is assembling the senior staff."

"Aye, Captain," he said and followed her.

Tom was already gone from sickbay and Kathryn exchanged a smile with B'Elanna on her way out. Miral was fast asleep and by the look on her face, it wouldn't be long until B'Elanna would be sleeping too.

The corridor was deserted, and with the Doctor walking quietly next to her, Kathryn could let her mind wander. Up until this morning, before they flew into the transwarp conduit and made it back home, she assumed she would see Miral growing up; she assumed she would see Tom and B'Elanna coping as new parents.

As hard and difficult as it might have gotten for them, combining family and work, she would miss it. She would miss them.

Her mind told her it was better this way. The ever present looming danger in the Delta Quadrant was not in the least family friendly, and in a crisis she needed Tom and B'Elanna at their posts. Now they had the chance for a normal, regular life.

As normal and regular as life can be with Tom Paris, she thought and suppressed a smirk.

The turbolift doors opened on deck one, and a blink of an eye later Kathryn and the Doctor entered the briefing room. The senior staff was already waiting, or what was left of them, Kathryn thought. Their lines had thinned out significantly. No Tuvok, no B'Elanna, no Neelix. Her heart ached but she didn't give herself time to grieve. She had to keep morale high.

Stepping to the head of the table, she looked at her crew. "I'm sure Commander Chakotay told you what this meeting is about," she said and sat down. All nodded and she kept her report short. "Admiral Hayes called me to say that Starfleet has appointed a hearing to discuss the Doctor's future. It is our obligation to convince Starfleet that he should be allowed a free, self-determined life."

"Can we speak on his behalf?" Tom asked.

"I don't see why not."

"I want to speak, too," Seven chimed in. "I will need the Doctor's help in the future."

"You don't have to lie for me, Seven," the Doctor told her.

"It's not a lie," she refused. "No one else knows how my Borg implants work. Icheb and I depend on your knowledge."

"She's got a point," Kathryn agreed. "You are needed, Doctor. And not just as our doctor, as our friend, too." She looked at all of them. "Those of you who are willing to speak, prepare your words and have them on my desk by 1800 hours. Seven, Harry, I want you to dig through Federation law. See if there's anything that could help us."

"Aye, Captain."

"Chakotay, inform the crew about the hearing. Perhaps more want to speak on the Doctor's behalf."

Chakotay nodded.

"Doctor, you should go back to sickbay, but prepare yourself for the hearing. I will come by later to discuss our strategy."

"What about me?" Tom asked.

"You should go back to sickbay, too," Kathryn smiled. "The hearing is tomorrow morning at 0800 hours. I want us to be ready by then."

Eager to get to work, they got ready to leave but Kathryn didn't dismiss them just yet. "Before you go, I have something else to say."

They stilled and looked at her with the same attention and openness they always did. Their dedication touched Kathryn deeply and made her next words even harder. "After the hearing, we are clear to depart."

Eerie silence filled the room. No joy, no relief, no happiness. All tried to grasp the meaning of those words.

"This is it?" Tom voiced their thoughts.

"It is," Kathryn nodded. "Our journey is over."

The consternation was palpable. Even though they had worked towards this day for seven years, there was no satisfaction; no pride in what they had accomplished. The moment was too sad to be happy.

"What is going to happen to Voyager?" Seven asked.

"Voyager will dock at Utopia Planitia for the foreseeable future. Starfleet's engineers are interested in the technology."

By the look on their faces, it was obvious that no one liked it.

"And then?"

"I don't know. I guess she'll stay in service."

"With a new captain?"

"Perhaps. Our homecoming was so sudden, Starfleet hasn't had time to figure out all the details yet."

"Forgive me for being so blunt," Tom chimed in. "But I can't imagine anyone else being captain of Voyager than you."

Kathryn smiled. "I don't know where my path is taking me, Tom, but I know yours. To sickbay, to your family. If that is all. Get to work."

They filed out and Kathryn evaded Chakotay's glance when she left the briefing room. The situation was hard enough, she had trouble staying in control even without seeing him being close to Seven.

Going straight to her ready room, she welcomed the solitude. Not letting her crew see how hard she was taking everything that was going on, was exhaustive and she needed a couple of minutes to center herself.

When she finally wanted to start working, she settled with a fresh cup of hot coffee at her desk. She thought it would be best to first read Tuvok's thoughts and arguments from the arbitration, but before she had the chance to open the file, her console beeped.

This couldn't be true, she thought and groaned. How could she do her job when she was interrupted so often?

To her delight, it was Lieutenant Barclay's happy face that greeted her, and her blue mood was gone in an instant. "Lieutenant Barclay, what a nice surprise!"

"Captain Janeway," he beamed. "I hope I'm not disturbing you?"

He was the first to ask her that, and she smiled. "Of course not, Reg. What can I do for you?"

"I… uh… I wanted to ask if… uh… if I could have your permission to come aboard?"

"You're welcome aboard any time, Reg," Kathryn assured him. "In fact, I don't know anyone better suited to be our first visitor than you."

Reg's beam got even brighter. "Thank you, Captain. I'll beam right over."

"I look forward to finally meet you in person."

"Likewise, Captain."

"I just hope it's the real you, not a hologram of you that has been tampered with," she said with a twinkle in her eyes.

"It is the real me," he laughed. "I'll be right there."

They closed the link and Kathryn left her ready room to pick Reg up. She didn't mind this kind of distraction. Lieutenant Barclay was one of them, and his cheerful, optimistic nature was exactly what she needed.

Entering the transporter room, she looked at Crewman Mitchell. "Is he ready?"

"Yes, Captain."

"Energize."

Mitchell activated the transporter and Lieutenant Barclay materialized. Standing still, he looked around in awe.

"Impressed?" Kathryn chuckled.

"It's so… real," he said, amazed, and stepped from the transporter pad.

"We think the same about being back at Earth."

"I can imagine."

Standing in front of each other, Kathryn smiled. "Welcome aboard."

"Thanks for having me." They shook hands and Reg's face sobered. "Captain, I'm not here to make a social call."

"I expected it."

"The Doctor's case is complicated."

"I know."

"Holograms have no legal rights."

"I know," she said, gravely, but didn't allow herself to become overly disconcerted. Instead, she looked at the bright side. "I guess you're here to help us."

"With your permission."

"Your help is more than appreciated, Reg."

"Thank you, Captain. The Doctor is my friend and I want him to be free."

She nodded. "So do we."

She gestured him to go ahead and they exited the transporter room.

"We owe you a lot, Reg."

"I owe you more than you can imagine."

"You must be sad that the Pathfinder Project has come to an end."

"No, I'm not sad," he shook his head firmly. "I'm happy that you brought your crew home."

"For a long time now, we have considered you a part of this crew," she told him.

Overwhelmed, Reg had trouble finding words. "You have no idea how much this means to me."

"You came through for us. You risked your career for us. You have no idea how much this meant to us."

"It was nothing," he refused, embarrassed.

"For us, it was everything, and we will never forget that."

"It was worth it, Captain," he said, a hint of pride in his voice.

"We can't thank you enough for your efforts," she said, earnestly, and then her tone got lighter. "Now, as an official member of our family, you want a grand tour of the ship?"

"I'd love to!" he exclaimed, excitedly.

"I'm pretty sure the Doctor would love showing you around. And it would distract him a little," she whispered, conspiratorially.

Reg laughed. "I'm here to help."

She laid her arm around his shoulder. "Well then, first stop, sickbay!"

=/\=

Back in her ready room, Kathryn finally found the peace and quiet she needed to work. With newfound optimism, thanks to Lieutenant Barclay's appearance onboard, she read Tuvok's arguments from the arbitration and started to come up with her own.

It was a difficult task. The Doctor's case was indeed complicated and her experience at defending members of her crew was long ago, it was from before Voyager, and back then the situations were always different. She'd had to defend actions, sometimes behavior of some of her crew, but never their lives.

Still, when Chakotay called to offer to work with her, she declined. She knew she was mixing personal and professional life, but she couldn't help it. She had to focus on her task, and she just couldn't do it with him around.

By 1800 hours she received a transmission from him with all the names of the crew who wanted to speak on the Doctor's behalf.

The number took her breath away. 137. Every single member of her crew, plus Lieutenant Barclay.

She sat back, stunned. She never expected that everyone wanted to say a few words, but it showed her that the Doctor was more than just accepted among the crew. He was one of them, their friend, and all cared about what happened to him.

She included that in her speech and not long after, she had a first outline she was quite satisfied with.

As she reread what she had written, her door chime rang and she looked up. "Come in."

Seven entered, carrying a stack of PADDs. "Ensign Kim and I finished going through the Federation law database and downloaded every law of importance."

"Thanks." Kathryn took the PADDs. "Is there something else?" she asked, when Seven remained standing in front of her desk.

"Yes, Captain."

"Did you find something else that could help us?"

"No. My topic is of a personal nature."

Kathryn would rather say that she had no time, that she had to work, but thought better. This was still Seven of Nine and she hadn't done anything wrong.

"You know, I could use a break," Kathryn said, rising, and walked to her replicator. "You want something, too?"

"No, thanks." Seven followed her to the upper level.

"I'm going to be indulgent," Kathryn found the strength to smile. "Coffee ice cream," she ordered, well knowing that she needed it to make it through the following minutes.

The bowl appeared and Kathryn gestured Seven to sit. "Tell me what's on your mind."

Seven sat, visibly uncomfortable. "I did something without seeking your guidance first."

Kathryn braced herself. "Oh?"

"A few days ago, the Doctor extracted the fail-safe device in my cortical node."

"I had no idea," Kathryn said, surprised.

"I feel… unsettled for not discussing it with you beforehand."

"You don't have to discuss everything with me, Seven. You can make your own decisions."

"Chakotay said you would understand."

Kathryn took a spoonful of ice-cream to hide her flinch. "I do."

"Experiencing the wide range of emotions is quite unsettling."

"You'll get used to it."

"Emotions are irrational. I don't think I will get ever used to it."

"You will. Trust me."

Clearly unconvinced, Seven looked at her captain.

"You've come a long way in the past four years, Seven," Kathryn assured her. "You will do fine, just give yourself some time."

"I would prefer adapting to the new situation on Voyager."

"I'm sorry, but that won't be possible. I'm sure you can adjust to it on Earth just as well."

"I must admit, the prospect of living among billions of individuals makes me uncomfortable."

"You'll find a place to your liking. Speaking of which, are you spending some time with your aunt?"

"She offered to let me stay with her."

"Am I hearing a 'but'?"

"I don't know… I thought I would stay in proximity to Chakotay."

"You don't?"

"Since we stopped dating…" she said as if Kathryn should know, "…I don't think I will."

Kathryn forced herself to hide her surprise. "You're not seeing each other anymore?"

"No. I came to realize that even though I trust Chakotay, I could never love him."

"Giving your heart to someone requires trust, Seven. That person has an emotional hold on you, whether you like it or not."

"I now think that I trusted Chakotay because you trust him."

"Maybe…"

"Where are you staying, Captain?"

"I'll spend some time with my mother and sister."

"At your childhood home?"

"Yes."

Seven thought for a second. "Many of the crew are planning to stay with their relatives. Perhaps I should do the same and reconnect with my aunt."

"I'm sure she'll like having you around."

Seven nodded once. "I'll take that into consideration. Thank you, Captain."

"My door is always open to you, not just on Voyager."

"I appreciate that. If you'll excuse me now, I promised the Doctor I would meet him and Lieutenant Barclay on the holodeck. He wanted us to show him Sandrine's."

Kathryn nodded and smiled. "Have fun."

Seven left and Kathryn ate the rest of her ice-cream, thinking about how she could've missed how much Seven had grown emotionally in the past couple of weeks. She was independent now and had started to make her own decisions.

Kathryn didn't know if she should be happy or sad about Seven being on the verge of not needing her anymore, but decided to be happy and proud. It made her sure that Seven would find her way in the Alpha Quadrant.

If she'd missed such an important change in Seven, was it possible she'd missed anything about Chakotay too, she wondered and tried to recall his behavior during the last couple of weeks.

Ashamed, she realized that she had no idea. They had spent very little time together and the only thing she came up with was that he had withdrawn from her. How and when, she didn't recall.

She felt bad about it. She was his so-called best friend and he obviously didn't feel as if he could come to her if he needed someone to talk to. He must've felt very lonely and she shouldn't blame him for seeking company and trying to be happy. It was the logical course of action; assuming there was a chance they might, possibly end up together once they got home was hardly a promise. Especially because she refused to talk about anything regarding the connection they shared. How should he know then what was going on inside her head?

She had to get that right, no matter the outcome, she decided, determined. He deserved no less from her.

If only she had time to do it now, she thought, sadly, but like every other day in the past seven years she had to focus on her task first and any personal topics had to wait. It was not fair to Chakotay, but she had no choice. The Doctor's hearing needed her full attention, and, pushing anything else aside for the time being, she went back to her desk.

=/\=

Kathryn's night was short. At 0430 hours, the computer woke her. Lying in her bed, she gave herself a moment to cherish the feeling. It was the last time she would lie there; it was the last day aboard Voyager.

Her stomach clenched and her heart grew heavy. That evening she would sit at her mother's table, eat her food and talk to her and her sister. She had trouble imagining it, and as she rose from her bed, she glanced outside to make sure it wasn't a dream. Earth greeted her bright and shiny, telling her that their homecoming was indeed real.

She went to her bathroom and noticed with a look in the mirror how tired she looked. She had spent hours last night working on the information Seven had brought her. Afterwards, she had met with the Doctor and Lieutenant Barclay. The usually bright and happy Doctor had been oddly quiet. It was no wonder, given the circumstances, and Kathryn was glad that Reg was there, cheering him up.

Getting ready for the day with a quick shower, she felt much more awake, and as she stood in her living space, organizing her PADDs, her door chime rang.

It wasn't even 0530 hours and she knew there was only one who would come to her at this early hour. "Come in."

Unusually cautious, Chakotay stepped in, holding a PADD in his hands. "Good morning," he said and seemed to gauge her mood.

"Good morning," she said with a smile and he relaxed. "What's that?" She pointed at the PADD.

"Today's duty roster."

"Oh? Did you make any changes?"

"Yes. Now that all of the crew want to speak in front of the hearing, I thought about how we could manage the crew rotation. I talked to Starfleet Command and asked how many people can attend the hearing room. They said twenty five, so I divided the crew into groups of twenty five, using the same row you want them to speak at the hearing."

"Thank you, Chakotay," she said, touched by his efforts, and took the PADD. "That's very thoughtful of you."

"It will make it easier," he shrugged.

"Will you beam down with us?"

"No, I will take the bridge until my group is in line."

She pressed her lips together. "I was hoping you'd beam down with us."

"Really?" He didn't expect that.

"It'll be the first time back on Earth. I want you to be there."

"All right," he nodded. "Harry can take the bridge."

She smiled, relieved, and he returned her smile immediately. She was glad that he didn't seem to be mad at her for being harsh the previous day.

"We should go." She gathered her PADD's and they left her quarters. "It's odd. Even though I had so little time, I feel prepared."

"That's a good thing."

"It should be," she said and he let her enter the turbolift first. "Deck one," she ordered.

"Are you worried?"

"I thought that I would have trouble preparing, that I would sweat over my arguments until the last minute, and now I sincerely hope I haven't forgotten something."

"If you want, I take a look at your notes."

"That would be great, thank you, Chakotay." She handed him her PADD's and smiled ruefully. "I'm sorry I declined your offer yesterday."

"It's okay, Kathryn. You had to focus on your task."

She turned fully to him. "No, I…"

The turbolift doors opened, interrupting her, and her shoulders hung. Why could they never have a minute?

His face mirrored her disappointment and she promised herself that she would talk to him as soon as this was all over.

They headed to the briefing room and some of the senior staff was already there, including Lieutenant Barclay, who tried very much to hide his excitement at attending a briefing on Voyager.

When they were accounted for, Kathryn made her report and told them about the course of action that day. Chakotay's work made it much easier, and everyone knew where to be when.

Ready to fight for the Doctor's rights, the briefing didn't take long, and Kathryn and Chakotay retreated into his office where he took a quick look at her notes.

Waiting anxiously for his opinion, Kathryn replicated a cup of coffee and walked up and down. She had no idea what to do if he didn't agree with her arguments.

"You're relying very much on his influence and life aboard Voyager," he commented, finally, without taking his eyes off the PADD.

"I had to. Federation law was no help, there just is no law regarding holographic rights."

"It's okay. I'm just saying…"

"You're just saying what?"

"Kathryn," he chuckled and looked at her. "I've never seen you this nervous."

"This is important. The Doctor's future depends on it."

"And I think you're well-prepared," he said, reaffirming her assumption.

"You really think so?"

"I would never lie to you," he said, seriously, but as soon as the words left his mouth, he sucked in his breath and his eyes widened, shocked. "Kathryn, I…"

She raised her hands, stopping him. "I know you wouldn't," she said, somberly.

She saw his surprise about her reaction, and their eyes locked, the air suddenly charged.

There was so much she wanted to say, so many words came to her mind. However, this was not the right place and time, she had to be patient and wait.

Looking away, she broke the connection. "Thanks for your help, Chakotay."

He cleared his throat and shifted uneasily in his seat. "You're welcome."

"We should…" She pointed at the door.

He nodded and handed her the PADDs. "I'm sure you'll win them over with this," he smiled.

She returned his smile and took the PADDs.

Leaving his office, they walked to the transporter room in silence. His steadfast presence made her steps and heart lighter. How she could ever think that her feelings for him had vanished was beyond her. They might have been buried under tons of stress and work, but during their journey they were one source of energy; one reason why she never gave up hope.

And she gained strength from it now, too. When she saw the first group assembled in the corridor outside the transporter room, she straightened, strong and sure that they would accomplish their goal.

The Doctor, Lieutenant Barclay and Seven waited in the transporter room.

"Are you ready, Doctor?" Kathryn asked, stepping on the transporter pad.

"No," he said at length. "But do I have a choice?"

"Don't worry," she said, reassuringly. "You will leave that hearing footloose and fancy free."

The Doctor smiled bravely, and Kathryn glanced at Chakotay, glad that he was there.

"Energize."

They materialized in a vast corridor in a building at Starfleet Headquarters. Except for the many people in Starfleet uniforms, it could've been any random building on any random planet. There was no connection that they were actually on Earth.

A Starfleet officer approached and showed them to the hearing room. Kathryn looked around and what she saw immediately eased her tension. On one side of the room, three tables stood in a large triangle. There were no oppositions, which supported Admiral Hayes' words, this wasn't a trial; it wasn't Starfleet against the Doctor.

On the other side of the room, three rows of chairs were lined up for the crew, and while the crew arrived and sat down, a woman not much older than Kathryn came to her and the Doctor. "I'm Admiral Bexett," she introduced herself. "I'm leading the hearing. You know Mr. Hamilton."

"Yes," Kathryn greeted the arbitrator from the Doctor's hearing a couple of weeks ago.

"And this is Commander Collins from the Daystrom Institute."

A tall man with short brown hair stepped forward and nodded towards them.

"Please sit down," Admiral Bexett gestured to one of the tables.

Kathryn and the Doctor took their seats, and Kathryn saw, pleased, that Chakotay was sitting in her line of vision. He did everything he could to show his silent support, and it warmed her heart.

Admiral Bexett took the middle seat at the table to Kathryn and the Doctor's right, Hamilton and Collins on each side, and the room quieted.

"In this hearing, we'll discuss the question if the EMH Mark I from the starship USS Voyager is sentient, and therefore allowed a free, self-determined life," Admiral Bexett opened the hearing and the Doctor shifted nervously. "Captain, I want to inform you that we don't need the formalities of a trial here," she looked directly at Kathryn. "Do you agree to that?"

"Yes, Admiral," Kathryn nodded.

"Very well. Then let's begin." She settled back in her seat. "At first, I want to hear your thoughts, Doctor."

Kathryn was equally surprised and happy that the Doctor was allowed to speak first.

"What do you want to hear, Admiral?" he asked, clumsily.

"Let's start at the beginning. When were you first activated?"

"On Stardate 48308. Voyager was just pulled into the Delta Quadrant. There were heavy casualties and we had lost all medical personnel."

"What did you do?"

"My job," he answered, confused by the question.

"How was that for you?"

"It was what I was programmed to do."

"And after the crisis was over?"

"I became Voyager's chief medical officer and a part of the crew."

"Tell us about it."

While the Doctor told the hearing about his experiences on Voyager, Kathryn watched Admiral Bexett. She liked the way she focused on him, that she talked directly with him, looked at him while he spoke and was attentive. Many people saw nothing more than a hologram in him, but it appeared as if she wasn't one of them.

She also felt strangely familiar to Kathryn, but she didn't know why. She didn't recall meeting her.

"And how do you think you've changed?"Admiral Bexett asked.

"I learned, I developed new skills, both professionally and personally, I made friends among the crew. In the beginning of our journey, I would've given anything to be made of flesh and blood, but over the years, I saw the advantage of being a hologram and now I'm proud I am. I don't have the same boundaries as organics. On Voyager it didn't matter what I was made of. I was a part of the crew, just like anyone else. I had the same rights, the same privileges and the same obligations."

"It says in your file," she took a PADD. "That you once added daydreaming to your program. Did you ever envision your life after your return to the Alpha Quadrant?"

"Once in a while."

"What did it look like?"

"That depended…"

"On what?"

"If Captain Janeway kept commanding Voyager."

Surprised, Kathryn turned her head to look at him.

"You wanted to stay Voyager's chief medical officer?" Admiral Bexett asked.

"Yes."

"What if Voyager was decommissioned?"

"I had various scenarios in mind."

"Such as?"

"I would like to work at Starfleet Medical. I think there are many patients that could profit from my knowledge."

"Thank you, Doctor," she ended her questioning. "Is there something you'd like to add?"

The Doctor shook his head.

She gave him a simple nod and turned her attention to Kathryn. "Captain, would you please tell the hearing about your first impression of the Doctor and your reasons of granting him autonomous rights?"

"Yes, Admiral," Kathryn straightened involuntarily. "When the Doctor was first activated, I thought of him as nothing but a computer program; a program that resembles a human being by using photons and forcefields.

"When we were pulled into the Delta Quadrant and lost our medical personnel, it was the kind of emergency the EMH was installed for. We turned to him and he did his job well. He saved lives and treated the injured. After the initial crisis was over, he continued working. It was the natural course of action as we had no backup crew.

"Not long into our journey, Kes came to me. She told me how the Doctor was treated by the crew; that they didn't talk directly to him, as though he wasn't there, that they didn't care about his emotions. I have to admit, I treated him the same. He simply wasn't a person in my opinion. Kes opened my eyes. She made me see how important the Doctor was to us, because, whether I liked it or not, he was our chief medical officer.

"Kes also helped me realize that his needs mattered, just like everyone else's, and I went to him to ask if there was anything that could make his work easier. He told me that the crew deactivated him when he had work to do, and didn't deactivate him when he had nothing to do. That was the reason why I gave him control over his deactivation sequence. He needed it to do his job properly, and it was the first step into his independency.

"Following my decision, there was a time of adjustment. The Doctor had to see himself as a vital part of the crew, and we had to set our prejudices aside and treat him with respect. That needed some time, but eventually every difference was laid to rest, and the Doctor was accepted as a full member of the crew. From that point on, he thrived, and during the years, I saw him learn, developing new skills; I saw him exceeding his program, making friends, even falling in love. He wasn't just a hologram anymore, he was one of us, and I now consider him a close friend."

"That may have been possible on a single ship in the Delta Quadrant, but we're in the Alpha Quadrant. If I grant him the same rights as anyone made of flesh and blood, other holograms will want the same," the admiral voiced her concerns. "I don't have to tell you that there are hundreds of holograms working in dilithium processing facilities all over the quadrant. We could have a rebellion on our hands in no time. The Doctor's holodeck creation already stirred them."

"We understand that, Your Honor," Kathryn said. "But we're not talking about holographic rights in general here, we are talking about the Doctor's rights."

"That is correct."

"To show how valuable the Doctor is, the crew wishes to speak to the hearing."

Admiral Bexett nodded in agreement. "Please continue."

"I'd like to begin with Lieutenant Paris."

Tom approached and sat at the empty table.

"Lieutenant, you worked closely with the Doctor. Was there ever a moment, a situation, when you thought that he wasn't a person?"

"No. He has a character, emotions, habits, a wicked sense of humor. He also has friends and hobbies. Simply put, I don't see any difference between him and any other person I ever met."

"Would you please describe how it was working with him?"

"Sure."

Tom told them about a typical day in sickbay and answered Kathryn and Admiral Bexett's questions afterwards.

The same went on with other crewmember, and one by one, Voyager's crew talked to the hearing, telling them about the Doctors influence on their life's and Voyager in general. Soon it was clear that the admiral hadn't expected anything like it and when Kathryn was about to call another crewmember, she raised a hand, stopping her. "How many more want to speak in front of the hearing?"

"121"

"That is the entire crew." Admiral Bexett couldn't hide her astonishment.

"Yes."

"I think you made your point clear, Captain."

"With all due respect, Your Honor, it was the crew who wanted to speak to the hearing. They all care about the Doctor."

"It is common knowledge that your crew has developed a bond no other crew has…"

"We are a family."

"Still, the Doctor is a part of Voyager."

"We all are a part of Voyager," Kathryn countered.

Admiral Bexett lowered her head. "You know what I mean."

"In fact, I do. I was voicing the same arguments when Kes came to me to talk about the Doctor. I told her that he was a program, a system, a tool. She reasoned on his behalf and I came to see that I needed to change my point of view. The Doctor needed to be treated as a full member of the crew. He was our chief medical officer. He claimed a very important position." She paused. "It was me who made the decision to give the Doctor autonomous rights. I had to make that decision."

"It is not in question that you granted him rights that any EMH in the Alpha Quadrant wouldn't have had. And it is not in question that you had to do it for the safety and well-being of your crew. What we have to decide is what rights he has here in the Alpha Quadrant, because if he would've been on any other ship, his fate would've been the same as the other EMH."

"You're saying?" Kathryn asked, having enough of the cryptic speech.

The admiral's eyes rested on Kathryn, her demeanor cool and neutral. "You're fighting for your crewmember. I appreciate that, Captain, but you should also keep in mind that he is a hologram."

"I'm very aware of that. That's why we made it home. We had various occasions when organics couldn't have saved us. Only the Doctor could. He was also the one who was sent to the Alpha Quadrant to report to Starfleet Voyager's whereabouts. He rescued a Starfleet vessel from Romulans during that mission."

"He did as he was ordered. He is programmed to follow orders."

"He didn't always follow my orders…" Kathryn argued passionately.

"I don't want to discuss the same arguments as in the arbitration here," Admiral Bexett cut her short. "The Doctor is certainly a special hologram, due to circumstances, but he is still a hologram."

Kathryn felt that she was losing the argument and she knew she had to play the final ace up her sleeve. "Your Honor, I would like to call one last crewmember to the stand. Seven of Nine."

"Proceed."

Seven stepped forward and sat down.

"Seven, would you please tell the hearing about your first contact with the Doctor," Kathryn asked and rose to walk in the middle.

"It was on Stardate 51004, the day I was severed from the collective."

"Why were you in the Doctor's care?"

"My human physiology was taking over and he had to dismantle my exoskeleton as well as removing most of the Borg implants from my body."

"It must've been a difficult time for you."

"There are no words for it, Captain."

"And afterwards? When the procedures were finished?"

"He started to mentor me. He helped me learn social skills and showed me how to connect with the crew."

"In essence, he helped you become human."

"Yes, Captain."

Kathryn turned to the hearing. "A hologram teaching an ex-Borg how to be human? It sounds like the blind leading the blind, but on the contrary, in many terms I think the Doctor knows better what it means to be human than many humans. Because as we can see," she gestured at Seven. "He did a remarkable job."

Kathryn turned to Seven again. "Now, if you don't mind me saying so, you don't look like as if you need any more social lessons. Why is the Doctor important to you?"

"Aside from the fact that he is my friend and I care about him, he is the only one who knows how my unique physiology works. It's his expertise I have to rely on because I still have Borg components in my body."

"So you need him as your doctor?"

"Yes."

"It is possible to extract his memories, the techniques and skills he developed," Admiral Bexett interjected and the Doctor cringed. "It could be installed into a new holomatrix."

"That would change who he is," Kathryn refused. "We're here because he deserves the right to stay as he is."

The admiral looked at the chronometer. "This is a too complex question to answer today. We'll reconvene tomorrow 0800 hours. Dismissed."

Kathryn exhaled, relieved. The recess would give her precious time to persuade the hearing.

Admiral Bexett, Commander Collins and Mr. Hamilton left, and the crew filed out.

"It's a start," Kathryn said to the Doctor, but he seemed to be skeptical. She couldn't blame him, although she was more hopeful now, because no matter what Admiral Bexett said, she seemed to be reasonable, and Kathryn had a good feeling about her.

The Doctor left with Seven, and Admiral Hayes entered the room. Seeing him, Kathryn got wary and almost instantly she felt Chakotay's presence behind her.

"Nice to finally meet you in person, Captain," Admiral Hayes said and shook her hand.

"Likewise, Admiral."

"Commander Chakotay."

The two men nodded at each other.

"Captain, I'm here to inform you that the recess isn't going to change that your crew is clear to depart. I'm sure everyone is eager to meet family and loved ones."

Kathryn swallowed past the lump in her throat. "I'm sure they are, Sir."

"And as soon as this is over, you'll be welcomed home."

"I appreciate that Starfleet waits with the celebrations."

"You have to focus on your task. There will be no interference."

"Thank you, Admiral. If you'll excuse us now."

"Certainly."

Without looking back, Kathryn hastened out of the room. Chakotay followed her just as swiftly and she stopped in the hall.

"Are you all right?" he asked, concerned.

"Yes," she said, full well knowing that he didn't believe her.

"Kathryn…"

"I will be, eventually," she said, convincingly, and he dropped the matter. "Chakotay, would you please inform the crew?"

For a second, he was puzzled. "Kathryn?"

"Please," she said, hoping that she didn't have to explain why she couldn't do it.

She shouldn't have worried. This was Chakotay, and he knew what was going on in her mind without asking questions.

"Of course," he nodded, knowing that she needed her strength for the Doctor's hearing. Emotional good-byes would come soon enough.

"Thank you." Her face softened and she smiled a small, grateful smile. "I knew I can count on you."

"Always," he breathed, earnestly.

Overwhelmed by his dedication, the air was knocked out of her lungs and she stared into his eyes. He had given her such a heartfelt promise before, and he never broke it. On the contrary, he still did everything in his power to make her burden lighter, and she couldn't thank him enough for it.

"We better get back to Voyager," she said, absent-mindedly, without breaking eye-contact.

"We better."

Reluctantly, they stepped apart, and she tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Voyager. Two to beam up."

=/\=

Not fifteen minutes later, Chakotay found her in her ready room, working on her console. To his relief, she appeared much more at ease and was smiling at him.

"What are you reading?" he asked and sat down.

She turned her console to him.

"Admiral Linda Bexett," he read aloud and smirked. "Checking up on your enemy?"

"She is not my enemy. To be honest, I don't think Starfleet could've chosen better."

"I agree. She seems fair and capable."

"Yes."

"So why are you checking up on her?"

Kathryn looked at the picture of Admiral Bexett. "She appeared familiar."

"Do you know her?"

"No," she shook her head.

"Perhaps you think she's familiar because she's a lot like you," he said, amused.

"You think so?"

"Yes," he nodded.

"I didn't notice," she mused.

"What did you find out about her?" he asked, curious.

"As captain she once commanded a three and a half year deep space mission. Although they were in constant contact with Starfleet, she knows how it feels to be on her own with no immediate back up."

"I have a feeling she understands our situation and what it means to a crew."

"Yes."

"Then why do you worry that much?"

"I don't have to tell you that this won't be relevant to her decision."

"True."

"She will decide the Doctor's future, and I don't like her comment of his knowledge getting transferred into a new holomatrix. He wouldn't be the same."

"I agree. So what's your plan?"

"More arguments as to why he's perfect the way he is. Why he doesn't need to be altered."

"It's going to be a lot of work."

"Yes," she sighed.

"Fortunately, we have plenty of help," he revealed, his eyes twinkling.

She frowned. "Who?"

"Our crew."

"I thought…."

"No one left the ship, Kathryn," he said, thickly.

"No one?"

"No one."

"What about Sam and Naomi? They must be eager to see her husband and father."

"Naomi is the worst of all," he smiled. "She set up camp in her quarters and refuses to leave the ship. Sam has no idea how to get her off board."

Kathryn chuckled. "They all stayed?" she asked just to be sure.

"Every single one."

Stunned, Kathryn didn't know what to say.

"You didn't expect anyone to leave, do you?" he asked, gently.

"To be honest, I didn't know what to expect."

He nodded in sympathy. "Me neither. I'm glad everyone stayed, though. It shows how close the crew has become."

"Yes. It also shows that our words aren't just hollow phrases. We are a family."

"Indeed," he smiled. "And a part of that family is waiting for us in the briefing room."

"Well then," she said, lightly. "What are we waiting for?"

Laughing, they rose and went to the briefing room. The senior staff was fully assembled, including Lieutenant Barclay, and Kathryn stepped to the head of the table. "I want to thank you all for staying. Your help is very much appreciated."

"The Doctor is one of us," Tom said and patted the Doctor's shoulder. "We're not leaving without him."

"Thank you, Mr. Paris," the Doctor smiled unusual sheepish.

"He is right," Kathryn agreed with Tom. "No one will be left behind. To accomplish that, we have to get to work," she said and sat down. "As you may have noticed, Admiral Bexett was impressed by the crew's speeches. I don't think there's any more doubt that the Doctor is one of us. What I don't like at all, was her comment about his knowledge getting transferred into a new holomatrix. It would change who he is, and I don't think he wants that."

She looked at the Doctor and he shook his head. "Not without having a say in it."

"I thought so. What we have to do now, is to come up with arguments to prove to the hearing that you are perfect as you are."

"Doesn't that bring us back to the initial question: Is the Doctor a sentient being?" Tom asked. "Because if he is, no one could decide what'll become of him without his approval."

Kathryn nodded. "You are right, Tom. I suggest we divide into teams, you, Harry and Reg concentrate on the question of how to prove that the Doctor is sentient, Chakotay, Seven, the Doctor and I will gather arguments about why he should stay as he is. Let's get to work."

The groups formed, and soon the room was filled with debate. Despite their head start from the previous day, it was slow-going and difficult. There was no real progress, and they had trouble coming up with anything useful.

Their already stagnating debates came to a full halt, when the door opened and B'Elanna came in, carrying Miral.

"What are you doing here?" Tom asked, not believing that she wanted to join them.

"You don't think I stay in our quarters when the Doctor needs my help?" she challenged.

"B'Elanna…"

"I can handle this."

Tom sighed. "Just keep it light, okay?"

She tilted her head to one side and glared at him, but he didn't look away and matched her glare. After a moment of silent battle, she gave in. "Fine, I will keep it light. But I won't leave!" she added just to be clear.

"Thank you," he smiled and took a look at their daughter.

From the other side of the room, Kathryn and Chakotay watched them.

"Cute, aren't they?"

"Hm hm," he murmured with a wicked grin.

"What?"

"Nothing," he shook his head, but his grin grew.

"Come on, tell me."

"I just thought that you would be just the same."

"Oh, would I?" she mocked with a mad undertone, but her happy shining eyes gave her away.

"Yes, you would. You could never sit in your quarters when there's work to do."

"A-ha. What makes you say that?"

"You proved it a hundred times."

She chuckled. "A hundred times, huh?"

"Perhaps even more."

"I must've been quite a handful."

He grinned at her. "Most of the times."

"Luckily, you were always there and kept an eye on me," she teased.

"Luckily, I was."

"Perhaps I should recommend you for the Starfleet Medal of Honor."

"I wouldn't say no to it."

His delighted grin was too much and she couldn't keep a straight face. "I will see to it," she laughed and patted his shoulder. "Now, let's get back to work."

"Aye, aye, Captain."

They rejoined the debate and listened to B'Elanna's suggestions. Even with her help, their task didn't get easier. They were still stuck, and soon, the groups dissolved and they discussed controversially throughout the entire room.

Miral felt the strained atmosphere and got restless. She wriggled in her mother's arms and made hiccup sounds.

"Shh," B'Elanna tried to soothe her but it didn't help. Miral was close to wailing loudly.

"I'm sorry, Captain," B'Elanna said when she noticed Kathryn's glance.

Kathryn raised her hands and walked to them. "Nothing to apologize for. This is all new for her," she said and looked at the unhappy baby.

"You want to give it a try?" B'Elanna asked.

"I'd love to."

Clumsily, Kathryn took Miral and watched in awe how she settled into her arms.

"We know who to call when we need a babysitter," Tom joked as Miral quieted.

"Any time, Mr. Paris," Kathryn said, mesmerized by the baby's eyes that looked up at her. "You know me, don't you?" she asked Miral, slowly rocking back and forth. "You remember my voice."

Miral cooed contentedly and, engrossed, Kathryn didn't notice that everyone was watching her.

"You are most adorable," she told her. "And that nose… Have you seen that cute, little nose?"

Suddenly she became aware of how quiet it was around her. Raising her head, she looked at the delighted faces of her crew. Only Chakotay's was flushed.

"We have indeed seen that 'cute, little nose'," Seven mimicked Tuvok and everyone laughed.

Kathryn laughed with them. "That was a remarkable Tuvok, Seven, but you forgot something important," she pointed at her eyebrow.

Seven raised her eyebrow, and laughs erupted again.

"You seem to have a knack for her, Captain," Harry smiled, meaning Miral.

"Surprisingly, yes," Kathryn smiled back. "I hope it wasn't a joke when you said you will ask me to watch her someday," she said to Tom and B'Elanna.

"We will," both said in unison.

"I look forward to it."

After their playful diversion, they wanted to get back to work, but realized that they had reached a dead-end. No one knew what to say, and an awkward silence filled the room.

"I guess we'll need help," Tom voiced what they all were thinking.

"And I know someone."

Everyone looked at Kathryn. She marched through the room and handed Miral to her father. "I can't believe I didn't think about it earlier."

"Who are you thinking about?" Chakotay asked.

"My ex-fiancé."

"Mark?"

"Mark. He is a philosopher, and he told me in one of his letters that one of the topics he and his colleagues are working on is the ethics regarding artificial intelligence."

"You have been in touch with him?" Chakotay asked, and Kathryn noticed a hint of jealousy in his voice.

"Yes."

"Who are you talking about?" Reg asked, oblivious to Chakotay's jealousy.

"Mark Johnson. He is a member of the Questor Group."

Reg got excited. "I know their work. They publish highly controversial papers and are well known among the Federation."

"Do you think he could help us?"

"I'm sure he can."

"Great, I'm calling him right away."

After a short glance at Chakotay, Kathryn walked to her ready room. It was obvious that he didn't like her calling Mark for help, but she couldn't take his feelings into consideration. They needed all the help they could get, and who knew, it was possible that Mark hadn't had time on such a short notice, or if he thought he wasn't the right person to help them and would recommend a colleague.

Deep down, Kathryn hoped he would help them. She still considered him a part of her life, not in a romantic way, as a friend, and she would love to see him again.

Sitting at her desk, she called him at his home and, to her luck, he answered her call.

"Kath! What a nice surprise."

"Mark," she smiled. "How are you?"

"I'm good," he returned her smile. "How are you?"

"Fine."

"I didn't expect you to call so soon."

"I have a reason," she admitted.

"Oh?"

"We need your help," she came right to the point.

He smiled, knowingly. "Your Doctor."

"Our Doctor," she said, surprised that he knew why she was calling him.

"How can I help you?"

"You once told me that you and your colleagues publish papers about the treatment of artificial intelligence."

"We do."

"I take it that you're an expert in the field."

"I wouldn't say expert. But I did extensive research on the topic. I also followed the arbitration about the Doctor's right to contribute art with interest."

"I'm glad you did. You know what we're talking about then."

"I do."

"I take it that you heard about the hearing?"

"I did."

"We're struggling to come up with the right arguments."

"It's not easy," he said in understanding.

"That's why we need your help."

"Of course I will help you," he smiled.

"The hearing is tomorrow morning. You'd have to come here now."

"That's no problem. I'll be right there."

"Thank you, Mark," Kathryn exhaled, relieved. "I'll meet you in Voyager's transporter room."

=/\=

Mark kept his word. Ten minutes later he materialized aboard Voyager. Seven long years they hadn't seen each other in person, and Kathryn's heart was beating in her chest when he reached out to her and hugged her close.

"It's so good to see you," he mumbled into her hair.

"It's good to see you, too," she said, breathing in his familiar scent. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

He squeezed her body to his before he released her. Holding her at arm's length, he studied her face. "You look good."

"Thanks."

"I like the new haircut."

She touched her hair. "It was easier to tame this way."

He laughed. "I can imagine."

They exited the transporter room and walked side by side to the turbolift.

"Thanks for helping us."

"Thanks for giving me the opportunity. It was just a question of time before we'd have to address this issue."

"Yes, I just wished it hadn't been our Doctor who raised it."

"You're very good friends," he stated.

"More than that. We're family."

"I'm excited to meet that family."

"You'll like them," Kathryn said and they entered the turbolift. "Deck one."

"I'm sure I will. Thanks to the vivid descriptions in your letters, it feels as if I already know them."

She laughed. "I just wanted to tell you about my life on Voyager."

He smiled. "I liked it."

"Did your wife like it, too?" she teased and nudged him with her elbow.

"Now that you mention it…" he said, pretending to think, "I've never seen her trying so hard making a neutral face."

Laughing, they stepped out of the turbolift.

"I'll apologize to her," she promised and they entered the briefing room.

The hustle and bustle stopped immediately and everyone looked at Mark.

Sobering, Kathryn turned to her crew. "I want you to meet Mark Johnson," she said.

"You can call me Mark," he smiled at them. "You are indeed a family," he said, astonished, when he saw the sleeping Miral.

"Miral is the newest addition," Kathryn smiled. "She is the daughter of Tom Paris and B'Elanna Torres." She gestured at the new parents.

"Nice to meet you," Mark said and they shook hands.

"And this is Reg Barclay."

"You're the officer from the Pathfinder Project," Mark said, recognizing Reg's face.

"I am."

"Thanks to you, we had two way communication."

"Indeed we did," Kathryn agreed with a large smile and Reg blushed. "Now, Reg is one of us."

"That he is," Harry patted Reg's shoulder in a friendly manner.

"You're Harry," Mark said as if he knew him closely.

"I am," Harry said, confused, but Mark merely grinned secretively.

"And you must be Seven of Nine."

"That is correct," Seven said.

"And here we have our infamous Doctor," Kathryn introduced him. "The man of the hour. Unfortunately."

"Who knows, Captain," the Doctor said, trying to look on the bright side.

"We'll find a way to make sure you leave that hearing as a free man," Mark promised.

"Thank you," the Doctor smiled, bravely.

"And last but not least, Chakotay."

"Nice to finally meet you," Mark smiled, broadly, and they shook hands.

"Likewise," Chakotay said, but his body language told Kathryn another story. He stood ramrod straight, trying to gain the last few inches he needed to match Mark's height. Still, she noticed that Mark was taller, and much broader built.

Mark looked around. "Where's Tuvok?"

"He has already left," she said with a sad heart.

"He did?"

"The minute we got home. He is suffering from a disease that is only curable on Vulcan."

"I didn't know he's ill… Will he be all right?"

"Now that he is with his family, there's a big chance he'll make a full recovery."

"I'm glad to hear that. I would've liked to see him again."

"If all goes well, perhaps at a later opportunity," she said, just to see Chakotay's reaction.

His jaw dropped, and she had to bite back a grin. His unfounded jealousy was heart-warming.

"Please sit down," she gestured at the chairs.

Mark sat down on Kathryn's right, and everyone else took their seats, too.

"We would like to hear your thoughts on our Doctor," she said, folding her hands on the table.

"Gladly. But first…" He reached into his pocket and retrieved a couple of PADDs. "I brought some of the papers my colleagues and I have written on how we treat artificial intelligence. Maybe they'll help us find a new angle."

"I'm sure they will."

"Now to you, Doctor. I don't know if you're aware of it, but to the friends and families of the Voyager crew you're quite a hero."

Instantly, the Doctor sat a little straighter. "I am?" he asked, not able to keep the pride from his voice.

"Yes. If it weren't for you, we would have never known Voyager's fate, we would have never known what happened to our loved ones. The Pathfinder Project would've never existed, there would've been no communication. It was all thanks to you."

"Well," the Doctor said, humbled. "It was Captain Janeway's decision to send me to the Alpha Quadrant."

"Perhaps. But you did it; it was you who came through to us. And that's what makes it almost impossible to talk about you as though you were a computer program."

The Doctor raised his hands. "That's alright. I don't take it personally."

Mark nodded once. "I'm relieved to hear that, because that's what you are. A computer program. However, does that make you less of a person? I would say no, according to some simple facts. First, you are adaptive. You learn, you develop skills, you make friends. Just like any other person. Second, you are self-aware. You know that your actions have consequences. And third, outwardly there's no way of telling what you're made of. You look human, you sound human, you act human.

"That's what my colleagues and I are discussing every time we talk about this topic. We create holograms in our own image. And what for? To treat them as servants?"

The Doctor nodded vehemently, agreeing to everything Mark said.

"Don't tell me you felt as if we treated you as a servant," Kathryn said, shocked.

"No, but many holograms are."

"Indeed," Mark nodded. "That's what we denounce. How can we create self-aware, feeling beings and then not care about them? That's unacceptable."

"Are you saying that it would be better if we create mindless automatons?" B'Elanna asked.

"Partly. I'm just saying that if we keep creating holograms that are self-aware and able to feel, we can't treat them as slaves."

"I know that if Voyager had stayed in the Alpha Quadrant, I would've faced the same fate as my fellow EMH Mark Ones," the Doctor said.

"How do think you'd have taken this?" Kathryn asked.

"I wouldn't have questioned it," he shrugged. "Like I don't think the other Mark Ones have questioned it. Until my holonovel was published."

"That leads us to the first question we have to answer. Do we want to argue only on the Doctor's behalf, or holographic rights in general?" Mark asked.

After a moment of silence, Kathryn spoke. "We should concentrate on the Doctor. I'm sure that as soon as he is allowed a free life, the fight for holographic rights will continue."

The Doctor nodded affirmative. "I will do anything in my power to give my fellow holograms freedom."

"That's exactly what Admiral Bexett spoke about," Tom chimed in.

"She voiced the concern that if the Doctor is allowed to live a free, self-determined life, other holograms will want the same," Kathryn explained. "She said that a rebellion could arise."

Mark thought about that. "The mobile emitter," he mused.

"What?" Kathryn asked.

"Holograms can only exist in places that are equipped with emitters," he voiced his thoughts. "You can say they are restricted, contained. Just like you were, Doctor, at the beginning of your journey."

"So the question about holographic rights can't automatically include other holograms," Kathryn realized.

"Exactly. It also means the Admiral's concern is baseless. A rebellion is highly unlikely, if not impossible."

"Then we not only have to convince the hearing that the Doctor is a sentient being, we also have to make sure that he is allowed to keep the mobile emitter," Kathryn concluded.

"Eventually yes. Now I would say that we concentrate on the question whether he's sentient."

"You're right. Let's get started."

Immediately, a vital discussion ensued, and the room filled with chatter.

Only Chakotay stayed quiet, watching Kathryn and Mark from the side. They seemed to get along pretty well, considering they hadn't seen each other in seven years.

No matter how often Chakotay told himself that Mark was married, he couldn't ease the feeling of jealousy. Too aware was he of the fact that they hadn't broken up because they didn't love each other anymore. They broke up because Mark thought Kathryn was dead and moved on. It wasn't unlikely that the feelings they once shared would resurface now that they were seeing each other in person again.

Chakotay knew there wasn't anything he could do about it. He had no hold on Kathryn; she was a free human being and could do whatever and go wherever she wanted. The mere thought of losing her was unbearable. He could never live without hearing her voice every day, without seeing her face and her smile.

As if on cue, she smiled at something Mark said and her face brightened like the sun.

Chakotay's chest tightened. How could he have been so foolish to risk everything he had with her? That woman was his partner, his best friend and he had never loved anyone as much as he loved her.

He had to talk to her. Soon. Even though she miraculously didn't seem to be mad at him anymore, he had to clear things up. He needed her for his inner peace.

Not having anything to add to the discussion, he took one of the essays. It was written by Mark, and Chakotay had to admit that he liked Mark's way of thinking and how he put a difficult topic into words. However, it was a single word that caught his attention. "Data," he murmured.

Everyone grew silent and looked at him.

"What?" Kathryn asked.

Chakotay put the PADD down. "Data," he said in realization. "He has the same rights as anyone made of flesh and blood."

"That's true," Tom said.

"We could take him as a precedent."

"We sure can," Kathryn said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "In fact, we should," she decided there and then and sat up.

Positivity spread through the room and Kathryn and Chakotay exchanged a smile.

"It's a brilliant idea, Chakotay," she told him.

"To be honest, I wouldn't have thought of it if Mark hadn't written about Data."

Mark waved dismissively. "I don't know if I would've thought of it off the top of my head," he admitted.

Mark's words surprised Chakotay and he didn't know how to react, because he still wasn't sure if he liked or disliked that Mark was onboard. He should be glad, though. Mark was there to help the Doctor, and Chakotay knew he should put his personal feelings aside. It wasn't easy, but he started by giving Mark a small, grateful nod.

Next to him, Kathryn divided her crew into groups again, and, enthusiastically, they got back to work. Harry, Seven and the Doctor gathered data about Data, B'Elanna, Reg and Mark discussed the technological and ethical difference between holograms and androids, and Tom and Chakotay read more philosophical essays.

After a while, Kathryn stood alone at the viewport, watching them. This was her crew at their best, huddling over a problem, solving it together. She loved them dearly and she would miss working with them every day.

Knowing that this was probably the last time they would be together like this, threatened tears into her eyes. She pressed her lips together, but her eyes watered up anyway and of course Chakotay noticed her mood changing. He looked at her and gave her a reassuring smile.

Oh, how she would miss him. The way he cared for her, the way he protected her, the way he was always around when she needed him. She rarely showed how much she liked it, but deep down, she loved it.

At the beginning of their journey, she sometimes wondered if he only cared about her because she was his captain. As first officer it was his duty to keep her safe.

Soon, even before their stay on New Earth, she realized it wasn't. There was an unmistakable connection between them, a connection she never experienced before. It was as exciting as it was scary, and she often wondered where it would lead them.

To this day, she had no idea. The only thing she knew was that the homecoming she imagined, with her and Chakotay starting a relationship, wasn't going to be reality.

Miral was becoming fussy and pulled Kathryn out of her reverie.

"Someone's getting hungry," Tom said, trying to handle the kicking baby who wailed loudly now.

B'Elanna took her. "I'll be right back."

"There's no need to hurry. We could all use a break," Kathryn said, stepping to the table. "Go to the mess hall, get a bite."

Nodding, they left the room, but Chakotay and Mark lingered when they saw Kathryn staying behind, looking at a PADD.

"Won't you join us?" Chakotay asked.

"I have too much work to do," she said without taking her eyes off the PADD.

The two men looked at each other and both knew what the other thought.

"Come on, you need a break, too," Chakotay went on.

"I'm fine."

"When was the last time you've eaten?"

"I don't know."

"That answer is the worst you could possibly give. Now come on, join us."

"I can't."

"We don't take no for an answer."

Straightening, she put her hands on her hips and looked from on to the other. "Are you two ganging up on me? It's even worse than him…" She nodded towards Chakotay. "… and Tuvok doing it."

"We're not leaving without you," Mark made clear.

Kathryn narrowed her eyes. "I guess I'm outnumbered then."

"I guess you are," Chakotay grinned.

Passing them on her way out, she scolded them with a death glare, not giving away that she thought it was kind of cute that they cared so much.

Together, they went to the mess hall. It was full, but Chakotay and Mark found an empty table in the corner after they got something to eat.

"Thanks for helping me," Chakotay said, putting his tray on the table and sat down.

"It was nothing," Mark waved it off and sat down on the opposite site.

Chakotay looked in Kathryn's direction. "She's driving herself to exhaustion. Again."

Mark nodded. "She always does that."

Chakotay turned his head, surprised. "She did that before we got stranded?"

"Yes. She feels guilty."

Chakotay's jaw dropped. "I thought it started when she destroyed the Caretaker's array."

Mark shook his head and dipped his spoon into the soup. "No. It started when her father died. She blamed herself for his death."

Chakotay needed a moment to process Mark's words.

"Let me guess, she never told you."

"She was very evasive when it came to her father."

Mark nodded. "She has been since the accident. She loved her father dearly and was devastated when he died. But I'm sure she will tell you the whole story one day."

"I hope she does," Chakotay said, absent-mindedly. "She doesn't have to deal with it on her own."

"That's how she is."

"Oh, yes," Chakotay agreed. "It made it very difficult keeping an eye on her."

"She surely gave you a hard time."

"Putting it mildly," Chakotay grinned.

Kathryn approached the table, a tray in her hands. "You're talking about me."

"Why do you think that?" Mark asked, innocently.

"I can tell," she countered and sat down next to Chakotay.

"Isn't that a bit presumptuous?"

"Not at all. You two are dangerous together."

Both men grinned. "We only want the best for you."

"Uh-uh," she grumbled and dug her fork in her food.

"I should warn you," Chakotay said, amused. "Chell's cooking is nothing like Neelix's."

Kathryn looked at the food on her fork. "Worse?"

"Much worse."

She put the fork back down. "I guess I should take the advantage of not having to ration energy anymore."

"Your stomach will thank you."

Kathryn rose and walked to the line of officers at the replicator.

"Coffee ice cream is no lunch!" Mark and Chakotay called after her.

She gave them another death glare over her shoulder, and they looked at each other and laughed.

"Old habits die hard, I guess," Mark laughed.

"Appears so."

"You two seem to be pretty close," Mark observed.

Chakotay blushed and looked at the food on his plate. "It was inevitable."

"You don't have to be embarrassed. It's nice to know that Kathryn had someone to rely on out there."

"You have an interesting job," Chakotay said, evading Mark's comment.

"It's great, discussing and solving the problems of our time. I heard you want to teach at the Academy. That's interesting, too."

"How do you know?"

"Kath told me."

"She told you about my plans?" Chakotay was genuinely puzzled.

"She did."

"I didn't know you had contact, let alone talked about me."

"Oh, we had, and your name came up once in a while," Mark smiled, secretively.

Chakotay tried to read his expression, but couldn't and before he was able to ask Mark about it Ayala's voice rang over the comm.

"Bridge to Commander Chakotay."

Chakotay tapped his combadge. "Chakotay here."

"Commander, there's an incoming transmission for you."

Chakotay frowned. He had no idea who that could be and Ayala sounded quite amused.

"Route it to my office. Chakotay out. I'm sorry," he said to Mark and rose.

=/\=

After dinner it was getting quiet in the mess hall, and Kathryn used the opportunity to stand at the viewport and gaze outside. It was the first quiet moment she had that day, and she assumed it would also be the last so she cherished every second of it.

Transfixed by the sight of Earth, she didn't notice when Chakotay came in, spotting her.

"Can't get enough of the view?" he smirked.

"Not at all," she smiled and turned to him. "It's still unreal."

"It is."

He had his hands behind his back and she could tell by the look on his face that he was up to something.

"How are you?" he asked.

"I'm fine. A little tired, I guess," she said and rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"Why don't you go to your quarters, get some rest?"

"You know I can't."

His face broke into a smile. "I knew you would say that."

He revealed a steaming cup of coffee from behind his back and she started to beam.

"Thank you, Chakotay."

He handed her the cup and, eagerly, she took a sip. "It tastes wonderful," she breathed, delighted.

"There's a reason." He grinned from ear to ear. "It's real."

"How did you…?" she asked, surprised.

He raised his hands. "I don't give my sources away."

"My mother," she stated, dryly.

Chakotay couldn't maintain his poker face and chuckled. "She wanted to surprise you and called me. She thought you would appreciate it."

"Oh, I do," she said, touched that her mother made the effort. "I really do."

She took another sip and he loved the bliss on her face.

"So my mother called you, huh," she smirked.

His eyes shone and, if possible, his grin grew. "She did."

"I hope she didn't say something inappropriate."

He chuckled. It was the first time he had talked to her mother and he had found out quickly how blunt she could be. "She didn't," he reassured Kathryn.

"I'm glad," she smiled and placed her hand on his chest.

They looked into each other's eyes and both felt the ever present connection.

"Thank you, Chakotay," she said, again, and he knew she didn't mean the coffee.

He looked down, trying to keep his emotions in check and saw her hand still resting on his chest.

His face flushed. "Kathryn, I need to talk to you," he said, wanting to get things straight.

"Not now, okay?" she urged and dropped her hand. "When all of this is over."

He raised his eyes to hers and nodded. "Okay."

Glad that he didn't push her, she relaxed. "What do you think about our arguments?" she asked, back to business, back to safe ground.

"I think we finally found the right approach."

"I think so, too. It was good that you brought Data up."

"He could be the point in our favor."

"Yes," she agreed. "Let's go back to the briefing room, see what the others are doing."

He gestured to her to go first. "After you."

=/\=

A couple of hours later, Chakotay stood at the exact same spot in the mess hall where Kathryn had stood earlier. He, too, gazed at the big blue planet outside, not tiring of the view.

It was late, and the ocean pitch-black at the North American west coast, but the golden lines of light, almost like a nervous system, showed him exactly where San Francisco was. He even could make out the illuminated Starfleet Headquarters, and somewhere close, Starfleet Academy.

Although it was a long lost dream to live on Earth and teach at the Academy, it would be weird living planetside again, alone in a Starfleet officer quarters or an apartment. He had never really thought it through during the past seven years and tonight he became painfully aware of how lonely it would be, without contact with the crew, without contact with Kathryn.

The loneliness had overwhelmed him and he couldn't stay in the solitude of his quarters, so he had walked the ship aimlessly before he ended up in the mess hall.

He had assumed that some of the crew would be here, coming together on their last night on Voyager, but it was deserted.

With hanging shoulders, he had taken the few steps to the viewports, thinking about how he imagined his last night on Voyager. He wanted to spend it with Kathryn over the bottle of Antarian cider he preserved for this occasion. It was the last one, still hidden safely in the cargo bay, and it was hard on him that they wouldn't empty it tonight.

He couldn't change it, though. She had told him she was going to her quarters and he knew she was tired to the bone and needed to rest. She had to be at her best the next day.

The mess hall doors opened and, turning around, he hoped against hope that it was Kathryn.

It wasn't Kathryn. It was Mark.

"Missing anything?" Chakotay asked when he saw him looking from table to table.

Startled, Mark looked up. "Oh, I didn't see you there. Yes, I'm… There it is." He spotted his missing PADD on a table and took it. "Still can't believe it?" he smiled, nodding towards Earth.

"Not a bit."

Chakotay turned back to the viewport and Mark joined him.

"Many of your crew feels the same way."

"I know. We were very often very close. That hurt."

"Kath seems to be struggling too."

"She's unsettled. She's feeling like a shepherd who is about to lose her flock."

"She can't let go."

Chakotay turned his head, looking at Mark. "None of us can."

"You created quite a bond with your crew."

"Fortunately, it came naturally. It was crucial for our survival that we functioned as one, harmonic group. If we would've been at each other's throats constantly, we wouldn't have come very far."

"Probably not," Mark agreed. "And now you even call that group family."

"Indeed."

"That's impressive."

"Like in any other family, it wasn't always easy, but we made it work."

Quietly, Mark nodded, thinking about Chakotay's words. Outside, North Africa and Europe came into view, the first rays of morning sunlight brightening the Mediterranean Sea.

"It's beautiful," Mark said in awe.

"Haven't you seen Earth from this altitude before?"

"Not often."

"I love the view of Earth from orbit. Nothing can compare to it. Not even my home planet."

"I prefer to stay on solid ground. I'm not made for space travel."

"I always wanted to travel among the stars," Chakotay said, longingly.

"That sounds familiar," Mark smiled.

"Yes, in that point Kathryn and I are very similar."

Mark looked at Chakotay from the side. "May I ask you a personal question?"

"Sure."

"Why didn't you take your relationship with Kath a step further? I don't mean to pry, but it's pretty obvious what you feel for each other."

Chakotay's jaw dropped. "How do you…?"

"It wasn't hard to tell. Even though Kath didn't tell me any details, I already assumed from her letters. Now that I have seen you together, I knew I was right. I am right, or…?"

Chakotay saw no point in denying it. "You are."

"I'm asking because I wanted to know that I wasn't the reason," Mark asked, genuinely worried.

Chakotay paused, surprised. "You weren't the reason," he told him. "Our situation was."

Mark let out a sigh of relief. "I guessed so, but I wasn't sure."

"It just wouldn't have been wise entering a relationship."

"I have no idea how you did it."

"It was what we had to do," Chakotay shrugged. "A personal relationship could've endangered our command structure."

"And now that you're home?"

He sighed. "It's still complicated."

"For what it's worth, I hope you can sort it out. You seem to make her very happy."

Chakotay bit back any comment about him disappointing her by dating Seven. "We'll see," he said, vaguely, not daring to hope that eventually everything would turn out well.

"Well, it's getting late," Mark said, getting ready to leave. "I should go."

Chakotay nodded. "Shall I bring you to the transporter room?"

"I'll find the way, thanks. See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow."

=/\=

Meanwhile, one deck below, Kathryn wandered restlessly through her quarters. It was the second last night on Voyager, and it still wasn't like she imagined it.

She imagined sitting with Chakotay over a glass of wine, talking about the past and the future, feeling free and relaxed. Never had she envisioned spending the evening alone, feeling nowhere near free and relaxed. Too heavily weighed the responsibility of the Doctor's future on her shoulders and she wondered why Chakotay hadn't shown up yet to help her deal with the situation.

During their journey, he seemed to have a sixth sense for whenever she was troubled and came to her without asking. Tonight she even told him she would be in her quarters, and she didn't understand why he hadn't shown up.

It saddened her deeply and she sincerely hoped that this wasn't a first glimpse at how her life would be from now on. It would be too dreary to even imagine.

Her door chime rang and a smile formed on her lips. It seemed as if her gloomy thoughts had been premature.

"Come in."

She would recognize that silhouette everywhere and, confused, she frowned. "Mark."

"I hope I'm not disturbing you."

"Not at all," she smiled, hiding her disappointment about expecting Chakotay. "Come in."

He walked up to her and the doors closed.

"What are you still doing here? I thought you were on your way home."

"I wanted to see how you're doing."

"Me? I'm fine."

His scrutinizing glance went right through her façade. "You don't expect me to believe that, do you?"

She sighed, caught. "You're right, I'm sorry," she said, rubbing her face with both hands. "It's just… It's been a lot the past few days."

Nodding in understanding, he closed the space between them and took her into a hug. Taken aback by his motion, her first intention was to push him away, but then she realized that she wasn't his captain. She was his friend, his ex-fiancée, and he was simply comforting her.

It felt unfamiliar to be comforted like that, and she needed a moment to accept it. When she did, she reached around his waist and rested her cheek on his chest, cherishing the feeling.

"This feels nice," she mumbled into his shirt, causing him to smile.

"It does," he agreed.

"I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

He kept embracing her a little longer before he squeezed her close and released her.

"Thank you," she said, straightening her uniform. "I needed that."

"You're welcome."

They stepped apart and he looked around her quarters.

"Do you remember it?" she asked.

"Of course."

He had been in her quarters once; before Voyager left Earth. Kathryn wanted him to see where she would spend her time and he thought of them as typical Starfleet, impersonal and sterile.

To his astonishment, that hadn't changed. Except for a few items, they lacked any personal touch and didn't feel homey at all. He didn't know why she liked being here that much, but then, he didn't relate to Starfleet the way she did.

"I like my quarters," she said as if she could read his mind. "They're functional."

"Oh, you won't get an argument about that," he grinned and earned one of her best death glares in return. "It never worked on me, you know that," he told her, pointing at her face.

She pressed her lips together. "I know," she said, grouchy, but her eyes twinkled, amused.

Laughing, he couldn't resist the urge to take her into another hug. "I'm so glad you made it home, Kath."

"You're not the only one."

Holding her at arm's length, he searched her face. "Why do I get the feeling you're not talking about yourself?"

"Were you always able to read me like an open book?" she asked, narrowing her eyes playfully.

He laughed. "I don't know."

With one arm around her shoulder, he guided her to the sofa. "Come on, talk to me."

They sat down next to each other and she turned to him. "To be honest, I have no idea how to feel about our return."

"Why is that?"

Sighing deeply, she thought about how to put her thoughts into words. "It's too much to comprehend. And…" she added, hesitantly. "And it feels as if I have to leave home, not being back."

"Voyager has become your home," he stated the obvious.

"Yes. The people, my crew, they're my family." She swallowed. "I'm going to miss them, I'm going to miss them terribly. Look at me, for seven years I worked towards this day, and now I can think of nothing else than that I'm about to lose them."

"You're not going to lose them," he reassured her, astonished that Chakotay had hit bull's eye with his assumption. She was indeed unsettled about losing her crew.

"They're going to leave in every direction."

"Some of them, yes. But those you care most about will stay close."

"What if they don't?"

"They will."

"You can't be sure of that."

"I am."

"I don't know why you're so confident, but I can't shake the feeling of losing my family and my home."

"Home isn't a place, Kath, it's a feeling."

"Easy for you to say, you have a home."

"But it's not my house. It's Carla," he said and smiled involuntarily. "There's a reason for the saying 'Home is where your heart is'." He looked at Kathryn. "Where is your heart?"

"On Voyager."

"On Voyager?" he asked, hoping she would finally spill what he already knew.

She needed a moment to say it. "Chakotay."

Mark started to grin widely. "I thought so."

His reaction surprised her. "You don't have a problem with me being in love with Chakotay?" It was the first time she said it out loud and a pleasant tingle spread through her body.

"Not at all. To be honest, I'm glad about it. I felt bad for getting involved with Carla."

"You had no reason to feel bad."

"Tell that to my conscience. I didn't know what happened to you, I didn't know if you were dead or alive, I didn't know if or how or when I should move on. Admitting my feelings for Carla was extremely difficult, and when the message came that you were alive, I was shocked. I didn't know how to react." He looked down. "To write you that letter was the hardest thing I've ever done."

Kathryn laid her hand on his thigh. "You did the right thing by moving on," she reassured him.

"It felt wrong to me."

"It wasn't," she said, firmly. "You deserve to be happy."

"You deserve to be happy, too."

Her face got hard and she pulled her hand away. "My situation was different. I'm Chakotay's captain."

"In seven years, was there never any chance for the two of you?"

"Of course there was," she said, thinking about a planet far away; about Talaxian tomatoes and a wooden bathtub.

"On the planet?"

Surprised, Kathryn looked at him. "How do you know?"

A small grin spread over Mark's face. "Tom told me."

"Tom?"

"Your crew seems to be very fond of me," he said and his grin grew. "They told me many stories and also kept asking questions about you."

She shook her head and smirked. "They're a handful. What did they tell you?"

"That you and Chakotay spend several weeks abandoned on an alien planet."

She nodded. "That is true."

"And nothing happened?"

"I wouldn't say nothing. We got to know each other better and deepened our friendship."

"I meant in a romantic way, Kath."

"You are very curious," she evaded his comment. "Why does it interest you so much?"

"Because you both seem to be very sad and I'm afraid that I am the reason."

"You aren't. It's true, I may have used you as a safety net to not get involved with somebody in the first years of our journey. But there was never a real chance for me to start a relationship. As captain, I had to put my life on hold."

"Did you really?"

"It was a conscious choice. I had to focus on my mission."

"Your mission is over."

"That is true," she said and noticed that she still didn't realize the full impact of those words.

"Do you plan to talk to Chakotay?"

"We agreed to talk as soon as all of this is over."

He smiled, gently. "I'm sure it'll turn out well."

"You're awfully sure," she said, skeptically.

"I am," he said, not giving his conversation with Chakotay away. "Are you feeling better now?"

"I am," she said and he believed her. "You should go. I'm sure Carla is waiting for you."

He nodded and they rose. "Good night, Kath."

"I hate it when you call me that," she admitted, out of the blue.

He paused. "You do?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm telling you now."

"Okay then, good night, Kathryn," he smiled and kissed her on the cheek.

"See you tomorrow. And tell Carla I look forward to meeting her," she poked his chest with her index finger.

"She'll be thrilled. And even more if you have company," he winked.

"She doesn't have to be jealous."

"You're my ex-fiancée, the infamous Captain Janeway; the one who brought her crew and ship home from the Delta Quadrant. She is jealous, even if she doesn't admit it."

"I hope you won't get into trouble now that you're helping me."

"Not at all," he reassured her with a twinkle in his eyes. "It makes everything more… interesting."

Kathryn laughed and slapped his shoulder playfully. "Just don't take it too far."

"I won't. I promise," he said and, for a second, they smiled at each other. "Sleep well, Kathryn."

"You, too."

When Mark was gone, Kathryn thought about paying Chakotay a visit but decided against it. The next day would be hard enough, and after the hearing they had all the time in the world to talk about the issues they needed to talk about.

=/\=

Early the next day, Kathryn walked with determined steps to transporter room one. Her conversation with Mark had lightened her spirits immensely, and it was good it did because she now felt confident and sure and ready to face the day.

She and her senior staff agreed to meet in the transporter room and entering it, she saw, pleased, that they were fully assembled.

There was just one person missing. "Where is Reg?" she asked, looking around.

"Perhaps he's still asleep," Tom joked. "He said he slept like a baby the night before."

"He loves sleeping on Voyager," the Doctor explained. "It's the only place where he actually can sleep."

Kathryn tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Lieutenant Barclay," she called but received no answer. "Computer, locate Lieutenant Barclay."

"Lieutenant Barclay is not aboard Voyager."

They looked at each other blankly.

"Perhaps he's already beamed down?" Tom thought out loud.

"Possible, but why isn't he answering my call?"

"I'm sure he is waiting for us," the Doctor said, trying to hold up hope.

"We'll see. If he's not there, we'll have to do it without him," Kathryn said, stepping on the transporter pad and the others followed her. "Energize."

The transporter beam engulfed them and seconds later they materialized on the grounds of Starfleet Headquarters. Heavy grey clouds hung over the city and fine rain was in the air.

Instantly, goosebumps spread over Kathryn's body and for the first time she actually felt as though she was on Earth. "Wonderful feeling," she beamed and raised her face towards the sky.

The others felt similar and, for a moment, the group stood in awe.

A few steps away, at a dry spot under a rooftop, Mark was waiting. He didn't understand their excitement about the weather, and shook his head, smirking, when they came to him.

"Good morning," Kathryn greeted him, smiling widely.

"Morning."

"Have you seen Reg?"

"No, I thought he stayed on Voyager."

"He did, but he must've left some time in the night."

"I don't know where he is, sorry."

"It's odd." Kathryn couldn't think of a reason why Reg would leave on such a short notice without telling them. "We don't have time to search for him now," she said, eager to carry on. "We'll have to do it without him. Let's go."

Taking the lead, Kathryn went inside, her crew in her wake. Many eyes were focused on the small group, but Kathryn tried to ignore them, knowing that even before their homecoming she and her crew had become quite popular.

The hearing room was empty and Admiral Bexett, Commander Collins and Hamilton entered shortly after everyone found their seat.

"Captain Janeway, Doctor," Admiral Bexett greeted them with a small nod.

"Admiral."

They took their seats at the table, too, and Admiral Bexett opened the hearing. "We will continue where we ended yesterday. Captain, you have the floor."

"Thank you, Admiral. I'd like to bring forward a new argument why the Doctor should be allowed a free life."

"Please," Admiral Bexett gestured her to go on.

Kathryn rose. "It won't take long to explain because we all know what it means." She handed the admiral a PADD. "Data. We all know Commander Data, the Soong type android, the first artificial member of Starfleet. For some, Commander Data is just an android, a machine built to serve. For others he's a friend, a comrade. For most, he's a highly regarded Starfleet officer.

"On Stardate 42523.7 Commander Maddox wanted to disassemble Data to examine him. That request resolved into a hearing not unlike the one we have here today. Captain Picard fought for Data's rights and in the end, Captain Louvois decided that Data is a person before the law, just like anyone made of flesh and blood.

"I want to call that hearing and its outcome as precedence. Just like Data, our Doctor is a vital member of our crew and should also be allowed to decide his own fate. There are simply too many similarities to ignore them…"

From his first row seat, Chakotay watched Kathryn making her case. She was at her best, talking about Data, about him being sentient, about the similarities between him and the Doctor. She spoke passionately, used her hands to emphasize her words and walked unhurriedly across the room.

Every now and then, Chakotay exchanged a glance with Mark. He seemed as happy with Kathryn's speech as he was.

"We can't build androids and program holograms that are self-aware and able to learn and then suppress them in our society," Kathryn said. "There is a morality we have to face, especially because the Doctor is not only self-aware and able to learn, he also has emotions. To point out the ethical aspect of that issue, I'd like to call Mark Johnson to speak to the hearing."

Admiral Bexett nodded and Mark rose from his seat and stepped forward.

"Mr. Johnson, what qualifies you to talk about the subject?"

"I am a part of the Questor Group, Your Honor. We're a group of philosophers that publish texts all across Federation space."

"I am familiar with the Questor Group and some of its publications. If I remember correctly, there are quite a few regarding artificial intelligence and how we treat it."

"Yes, Admiral. It is one of our main topics."

The admiral nodded. "Tell us about it."

"Gladly." Mark cleared his throat and straightened. "Designing artificial intelligence with emotions is a double edged sword. On one side, it is clear that emotions are necessary for being a doctor. No one could treat a patient without empathy. It just wouldn't work. On the other side, there are no laws protecting those emotions, and that is a mistake.

"I don't want to get too deep into human history, but we all know that there was a time when humans with a certain skin color, religious belief or ethnic background had no rights either. It is unthinkable today, and we can't comprehend what it meant to those people and how hard they had to fight.

"Now we're at a new step of equality, because if we continue creating artificial life that is not only able to feel, but also to self-determine their own actions, make choices that impact others, and decide between right and wrong for themselves we need to include them in our society. There is just no way around it.

"To deepen that thought, I call Lieutenant Torres."

B'Elanna stepped forward and sat at the empty table.

"Lieutenant, please tell the hearing what happened to you on Stardate 54337."

"I was abducted by holograms."

"Elaborate."

"They were in a rebellion against their creators, Hirogen hunters. They wanted me to help them settle on a planet."

"Could you?"

"No."

"Why is that experience important to this hearing?"

"During my abduction the group grew. Or at least, the leading holograms wanted it to grow," B'Elanna said, her voice still showing the anger she felt about that incident. "They attacked a vessel, killing the pilot in the process, to rescue their own kind, as they called them. We noticed quickly that the two rescued holograms were neither self-aware, nor able to learn or feel, though. They had a basic, simple programming that allowed them nothing more than to receive their tasks and execute them. They were like tools, with arms and legs. The pilot's death was unnecessary."

Mark turned to Admiral Bexett and her colleagues. "What we want to show with that story is that if we create mindless automatons instead of self-aware beings, we don't need to care. But there's a man sitting over there…" He gestured at the Doctor. "…who knows exactly what is going on here and feels terrible about it. If you ask me, he has every right to do so because we talk about him as if he is something less than us. And that needs to change, Your Honor. Today."

Kathryn let Mark's words linger in the air for a moment. Then she straightened. "Thank you both."

B'Elanna and Mark nodded and went back to their seats.

"We still haven't mentioned the possibility of reprogramming the Doctor, leaving his memories and skills intact," Kathryn went on. "But just like Data was the vision, the dream, of Dr. Soong, the EMH Mark I was the dream, the creation, of Dr. Zimmerman. It is not up to us to tamper with his work."

"With all due respect, I don't see Dr. Zimmerman here defending his work," Admiral Bexett pointed out.

"Then perhaps you should have your eyesight checked," Dr. Zimmerman's voice echoed through the room.

Immediately, all eyes were on him and he waltzed to the center of the room, followed by Lieutenant Barclay. "I could recommend to you a very good doctor."

"Dr. Zimmerman, I won't let you turn this hearing into a circus," Admiral Bexett warned, but he didn't seem to care.

"Captain Jane," he said, passing Kathryn, and she rolled her eyes. She always hated that man's attitude.

"If you have something to add to the discussion, then do it seriously," Admiral Bexett interjected as if she could read Kathryn's thoughts.

He inhaled deeply. It was obvious that he'd rather be somewhere else.

"Dr. Z," Reg hissed, quietly, from behind him. "Please."

"All right, all right." He raised his hands, beaten, and looked at the Doctor, whose mood had brightened immensely in the past minute. "No EMH was ever designed to be active for that long. It is a wonder it is still intact, especially because it is filled with data it was never supposed to have. I know no other EMH that sings opera, runs around with a holocamera, plays golf, has friends; heck even dates and has a love life!"

The Doctor ducked his head and blushed.

"It was designed for short term medical support only, but the crew of…" He looked around, searching for the right name. "Voyager?" All nodded. "…had no choice but to keep him running. I guess I should consider myself lucky that they had to do it, because without him I wouldn't be standing here.

"Yes, it's true, I needed some time and persuasion to see past the fact that he is an EMH Mark I and accept him. Now I do, and so…" He sighed dramatically before he spoke the next word. "…please, let him be like he is, with all his flaws, and give him the freedom he deserves," he said as if those words were remembered lines and Kathryn had no idea if he meant what he said.

"Wouldn't it be better to install him into a new matrix?" Admiral Bexett asked.

"If you try to download him into a new, more advanced matrix, he may degrade. He is a Mark I after all."

"Dr. Zimmerman!" the admiral raised her voice.

"It is possible, but not recommended," he answered, obediently.

"Did you take a look at his program recently?"

"About a year ago. When he made the trip to the Alpha Quadrant to treat me."

"Was there everything all right?"

"Aside from a few mad people tampering with his matrix…" He gave Reg a stern glance. "He's in good health. He may outlive us all."

"Would it be okay with you if there's someone walking around, looking exactly like you?"

Dr. Zimmerman shrugged. "I created the Mark I in my own image. Now there are hundreds of them working in the dilithium processing facilities all over the quadrant. Believe me, I wouldn't mind if at least one of them would live a sentient life."

"Thank you, Dr. Zimmerman."

The admiral turned to Kathryn. "Captain, do you have anything to add?"

"No, Your Honor. Everything is said."

Tentatively, Reg stepped forward, clearing his throat quietly. "Admiral, I… I would like to say something."

"Please, Lieutenant." Admiral Bexett folded her hands on the table, giving Reg her full attention.

Nervously, he shifted from one foot to the other and stole a glance at Kathryn. They hadn't talked about this beforehand but he needed to say it. "Ad… Admiral, there's no group of people kinder than the Voyager crew. Even before they met me in person, they welcomed me into their lines and I'm the luckiest man in the entire galaxy they did, because what this crew shares is the most unique bond I've ever seen. They are a family, it didn't take me one second to notice, and nothing, nothing, should break that family apart."

The room was dead silent. No one had ever seen Reg speak with such a firm voice and he appeared taller and more self-confident.

Kathryn swallowed hard. She was deeply touched by Reg's words, but she also knew the sad truth. Even if the Doctor was granted a self-determined life, the family would break apart. It was inevitable.

Admiral Bexett's eyes rested on Reg and she nodded, gently. "Thank you, Lieutenant. The hearing will now retreat to discuss its final decision."

Bexett, Collins and Hamilton left, leaving the Voyager crew and its friends in silence.

Sitting down, Kathryn patted the Doctor's shoulder. "Everything will be all right," she said and he returned her comforting gesture with a forced smile.

She couldn't blame him. It was a difficult situation for any of them, and watching Dr. Zimmerman and Reg taking a seat, she felt her own nervousness increasing. She could not in the slightest gauge the hearing's final decision, and it unsettled her.

As if they had a mind of their own, her eyes found Chakotay's. He sat, unmoved, had his hands folded in his lap and was looking at her. Even though he was only a couple of footsteps away, it seemed like lightyears to Kathryn. She was used to having him close by; being able to whisper something that only he could hear. It gave her a sense of comfort, a sense she was missing in that moment.

He seemed to be aware of her distress and mouthed a few words, smiling reassuringly as he did so. She shrugged, apologetically, not getting what he was trying to tell her. He tried again, and she could well imagine it was something that would make her feel at ease but she still didn't understand and looked at him, puzzled. His eyes twinkled amused as he raised his hands, not knowing what to do to make her understand. His genuine effort alone was enough that her face broke into a smile, though, and she felt better in an instant.

It helped her through the following minutes, minutes that past in silence, minutes that felt like hours, but it actually was only half an hour later when Admiral Bexett, Commander Collins and Mr. Hamilton returned.

Kathryn didn't know if it was a good or a bad sign that they reached a decision this fast, and the tension in the room was palpable the moment Admiral Bexett turned to the Doctor.

"Doctor, when your program was installed into Voyager's computer, no one could have foreseen what would happen to the ship and its crew. It was an unfortunate turn of events that stranded Voyager in the Delta Quadrant. For you, it was a lucky chance. Being lost thousands of lightyears away from Federation space without a chief medical officer kept you from facing the same fate as any other EMH Mark I. Furthermore, it gave you the opportunity to grow and learn; to exceed your initial programming.

"It is not in question that you did a remarkable job in the past seven years. You saved the crew from a life-threatening situation more than once; you acted like a committed Starfleet officer, not only for your mission to come to the Alpha Quadrant to tell Starfleet Command Voyager's whereabouts. There's more to you than the eye can see. But is it enough to grant you autonomous rights?

"Commander Collins, Mr. Hamilton and I talked about the difference between you and the holograms in the dilithium processing facilities. And we found one, very important, difference. You, Captain." She looked at Kathryn. "You and your crew; the crew you even call family. You make the difference. The Doctor was essential to you, without him you wouldn't have survived. You were essential to him, too. Without you, he would've never had freedom aboard Voyager, he would have never exceeded his program. Now, he is a part of your crew like any member made of flesh and blood. That's what makes him unique. And that's why I can't say he's not sentient, because you, the Voyager family, made him sentient." She straightened. "This hearing decides that the Doctor is allowed a free, self-determined life. He is now a person in before the law."

She had to pause as a wave of sighs of relief washed through the room.

"However," she stopped any further emotional outbursts and looked at the Doctor. "There's a tiny thing that stands in the way of your unconditional freedom." She pointed at his arm. "The mobile emitter. Mr. Starling stole it from a Starfleet vessel. He had no right to give it to you."

Kathryn had the feeling that the Doctor was shrinking beside her. That was not going according to plan.

"Starfleet is not interested in a lawsuit, though, and so I was given the right to make you an offer. If you are willing to give the emitter to Commander Collins and the Daystrom Institute for analysis, you'll get it back to use. But that could take a couple of months."

"I'm willing, Your Honor," the Doctor nodded, vehemently.

"Very well, then, it's agreed," she said and smiled at him.

A rustle and bustle started and she raised a hand. "I won't dismiss the hearing just yet. We may have made a decision for the Doctor today, but there are still hundreds of holograms throughout the Quadrant; holograms, you said that right, who are able to feel and learn, who are self-aware. We have to make a decision for them, too. That is why Starfleet invented a task force, a group of experts and engineers who will think about new ways to deal with artificial life. It would help if Starfleet's most decorated holographic engineer would head that task force," she said with a stern look in Dr. Zimmerman's direction but he did everything to evade her glance.

She didn't give in and finally, he sighed loudly. "All right. But only if that task force will be based on Jupiter Station!"

"I'm sure that can be arranged," Admiral Bexett smiled, pleased. "The hearing is dismissed."

Filled with utter relief, Kathryn turned to the Doctor, a smile all over her face. "Congratulations, Doctor. You're a free man."

"Thank you, Captain. I owe you."

She waved dismissively. "It was my pleasure."

They rose and she extended her hand, but he took her into a fierce hug instead.

Surprised, she didn't know what to say.

She didn't have to speak. In no time, they were surrounded by the others and received congratulations.

"This is an important step towards holographic rights," Reg said, patting the Doctor's shoulder.

"I agree."

"To celebrate that important step and our homecoming, there's a ballroom waiting for us at the Presidio tonight," Tom announced, grinning from ear to ear.

"How did you pull that off?" Kathryn asked, astonished.

"I talked to my dad. But don't worry, Captain, there won't be any Starfleet brass. It's just going to be us."

"That's a brilliant idea," she said, happily.

"We have many reasons for a big party."

"Yes, we do." She turned to the Doctor and laid a hand on his shoulder. "We will just have to find a place where you can stay as long as your mobile emitter is at the Daystrom Institute."

"Actually…" He gave Dr. Zimmerman a meaningful glance. "I would like to go to Jupiter Station and join the task force. Please," he said when Dr. Zimmerman didn't respond. "I want to help my fellow holograms. And your laboratory is equipped with emitters. I could stay there without problems."

"Fine," Dr. Zimmerman grumbled, clearly annoyed by the prospect of having the Doctor around for months. "My home is your home."

"Don't say that too loud," Tom murmured for everyone to hear.

"Thank you," the Doctor said to Dr. Zimmerman, ignoring Tom's comment and the chuckles from the others. "And thank you for your support today."

"It wasn't easy to get him here," Reg chimed in and dared to lay an arm around Dr. Zimmerman's shoulders, something the older man obviously did not approve of. "I had to remind him what you did for him. You saved his life. I also reminded him that you're the only Mark I he can be proud of. You exceeded his expectations."

Proud, the Doctor smiled, but Dr. Zimmerman rolled his eyes and marched away. "Don't get presumptuous!"

"I learned from the best!" the Doctor called after him.

"I see you're in good hands," Kathryn laughed.

"I look forward to working with them," Reg said.

"You'll be on the task force?" Harry asked.

"I hope so."

"Do you think I could join it, too?" Harry's eyes brightened, hopeful.

"You won't leave me alone, will you, Harry!?" Tom said, pretending to be hurt.

"Not a chance!" Harry said, joyfully, giving Tom a friendly nudge and the small group left the room, laughing.

Kathryn, Mark and Chakotay stayed behind.

"I see why you like them so much," Mark said, watching them leave.

"They're great people."

"Even Tom?" Mark smirked.

"Of course," Kathryn said, confused by the question.

"I still remember the day you told me you wanted to get Admiral Paris' son out of prison to take him with you," Mark grinned. "You had quite a bit of trouble persuading Starfleet Command."

"The trouble was worth it," Kathryn smiled. "Don't you think so?" she asked Chakotay.

"Absolutely."

Mark looked from Kathryn to Chakotay and back. "I should go. See you soon?"

"You can count on it," Kathryn said and took Mark into a warm hug. "Thank you for your help."

"It was my honor," he said, hugging her close. "You did a remarkable job, Kath… ryn."

"Thank you."

Stepping apart, Mark shook hands with Chakotay. "Talk to you soon," he smiled, secretively, and Chakotay nodded.

When Mark was gone, Kathryn turned to Chakotay. "What was that supposed to mean?"

"Uh, nothing." He evaded her glance and tugged at his earlobe. "Thinking about a new career?" He changed the subject. "You're a perfect lawyer."

"I am not."

"Yes, you are."

"You're biased."

"Perhaps," he smirked. "But what you did up there was impressive."

"It was because the freedom of our friend was at stake."

"Now he is free. Thanks to you."

"Thanks to us."

"I wasn't involved that much."

She reached out and touched his chest. "Without your steadfast support, I wouldn't have made it."

"Kathryn, supporting you has always been natural for me," he said, thickly, and her heart skipped a beat. "It fills me with deep gratitude."

"Peace," she said.

"Peace," he echoed and both thought back to the night where he told her the ancient legend; the night their relationship could've changed forever if they hadn't had hesitated.

"After all these years, your words still amaze me."

"After all these years, my words are still true."

She looked into his eyes, mesmerized by what she saw. The urge to talk to him about what was standing between them was almost unbearable, but she held back. This wasn't the right place for a deeply emotional conversation.

He noticed her hesitation and cleared his throat. "Shall I pick you up later?"

She nodded, smiling widely. "I'd love that."

=/\=

At exactly nineteen hundred hours, Kathryn's door chime rang. She was just finishing getting ready by putting some earrings on.

"I'll be right there," she called out.

Letting her hands run down her waist, she looked at herself in the full-length mirror. Tom's policy of dressy attire was a great idea, she thought. No uniforms, no ranks. It was a first step into a new life, and for that step she had chosen a dark blue, knee-length dress that showed her calves, arms and just a little bit cleavage.

Satisfied with her appearance, she left her bedroom and went to the door. "Chakotay."

He was stunned. "Kathryn, you look…" his voice trailed off.

"Breathtaking?" she offered, delighted by his reaction.

"Yes," he grinned.

"You look quite handsome yourself."

"Thanks. It's been a while…" He looked down at himself. He was wearing a gray suit, without a tie, and a dark blue shirt.

"Let me guess… about seven years?" she asked, playfully.

He laughed. "Much longer."

"Well, it suits you. Shall we?"

He nodded, happily, and extended his arm for her.

=/\=

Later that night, when the party was in full swing, Kathryn mingled a little bit on her own, cherishing the feeling of being surrounded by her crew one last time. The atmosphere was relaxed and joyful; laughter and chatter filled the air.

She granted herself a glass of white wine and stood at a remote table, watching her people having fun. It was good to see them like this, and it dampened the feeling of having to say goodbye.

Sipping her wine, she saw Seven approaching her. She was wearing her hair down and had changed her tight catsuit for a dress; a rare sight, and Kathryn had to admit that she was stunningly beautiful.

"Seven," she smiled. "Enjoying the evening?"

"These gatherings are still not to my taste," Seven looked around, uncomfortably.

"It's just the crew, Seven," Kathryn said, gently.

"Tonight, perhaps."

"Still having trouble with being back in the Alpha Quadrant?"

"Yes."

"You'll have time to accommodate at your aunt's."

"I'm not staying at my aunt's."

"You are not?" Kathryn asked, surprised.

"No. I came here to inform you that Icheb and I will join the Doctor."

Kathryn's heart sank and her smile froze. "You're going to Jupiter Station?"

"Yes. We will have familiar people around and it is a secluded place to live."

"That it is."

"We will need to dismantle two alcoves from the cargo bay," Seven said and Kathryn had to swallow past the lump in her throat.

"Permission granted. Someone with Borg technology expertise has to do it."

"Ensign Kim offered to help now that Lieutenant Torres is incapacitated."

"She isn't 'incapacitated', Seven. She's given birth."

"Of course, Captain."

"I promise to make sure the alcoves will be installed as soon as possible."

"Thank you."

"And you promise me not to hide in that laboratory like Doctor Zimmerman. Go out, get to know the station, the people on it."

"I promise."

"And most importantly… call your old captain once in a while, tell her how you're doing."

"I will."

Kathryn tilted her head to the side and gave Seven a watery smile. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'm going to miss you too, Captain."

Kathryn pressed her lips together, and she couldn't resist and took Seven into a quick hug. "You'll do just fine in the Alpha Quadrant," she said without a doubt.

"I am not so certain," Seven said, skeptical.

They parted and Kathryn held her at arm's length. "Have some faith in your social capabilities. They're better than you think they are."

"I was not referring to my social capabilities."

"Then what were you referring to?"

"What if people can't see past the fact that I was Borg?"

"They will. Trust me. And remember, you can come to me any time you want. My door is always open."

Seven gave Kathryn a small, grateful smile. "Thank you, Captain," she said and Kathryn dropped her arms. "I'll see you before I leave?"

"Try and stop me."

Seven's smile grew and she nodded briefly before she turned and left.

Although it was heartbreaking to let her go, Kathryn was proud that Seven had started to manage her own life.

It was more than she could say of herself. The only thing she had sorted out was that she would spend some time at her childhood home. She didn't know where she would go and what she would do afterwards. Too sudden was their return and too many things were still unresolved.

She took a large sip of her wine and looked around. A small group, including Marla Gilmore, Harry and Jenny and Megan Delaney had started to dance and Kathryn chuckled when Jenny dragged Reg onto the dance floor. He squirmed and tried to escape her grasp but was unsuccessful, much to everyone else's delight.

Watching them dancing, Kathryn doubted that all of them had a specific plan now that they were home, either. Many were struggling just like her and needed to figure out how to go on.

As if on cue, Tom and B'Elanna crossed her line of vision and went to a table nearby.

"My parents offered to let us stay with them," Kathryn heard Tom saying.

B'Elanna lowered her head at him. "We talked about that."

"Don't worry, I said no. I told them we asked for officer quarters to have some time to look for our home."

"How did they react?"

"They understood. I even think my father was relieved. Still, they want to get to know you better and spend time with their granddaughter."

"They will," B'Elanna promised. She paused and hesitated. "My father called. He wants to see us."

Tom closed the distance between them and Kathryn had trouble hearing what he said. "I think that's a great idea."

"You do?"

"Yes." Tom kissed her forehead tenderly.

Without noticing, Chakotay slipped to Kathryn's side. "Eavesdropping?" he grinned, mischievously.

"Observing," she said without taking her eyes off the new parents.

"And?"

"It looks as if they're going to be just fine," Kathryn smiled and turned to him.

"That's good news," he said and looked at her intently. "What about you?"

"I'm fine too," she said in an automatic response. "I'm sorry," she apologized and pinched the bridge of her nose. "It's been a long day and old habits die hard, I guess."

"It's okay," he said in understanding and moved a little closer to her.

"The truth is, I have no idea how I am."

"You really don't?" he remarked and her eyes shot to his.

Their eyes locked, she had the feeling he was looking right into her soul, but instead of feeling raw and exposed, she felt safe.

And home.

Her heart pounded in her chest, the blood rushing through her veins, and she knew the moment to talk had finally come. "Why don't we…" She gestured to the balcony doors.

Chakotay nodded and together they walked outside. The air was fresh and the clouds had given way to a star sprinkled sky.

"It's beautiful," Kathryn said in awe.

"It is."

Standing next to each other, they gazed at the stars and the rising half moon that stood low above the tree line.

It was a sight Kathryn had missed terribly, but as she looked up at the familiar night sky, she couldn't see past the fact that somewhere up there was Voyager, waiting to be brought to Utopia Planitia. It saddened her deeply, and being caught up in her own thoughts, she didn't notice that Chakotay was fighting his own demons. He needed to tell her about dating Seven and he feared Kathryn's reaction.

Gathering his courage, he turned to her. "Kathryn…" His words died in his throat. Tears were in her eyes and threatened to run down her cheeks. "What is it?" he asked, alarmed.

"It's over," she sobbed.

A cold shudder ran down his spine and his chest tightened. "What?"

"Seven, Icheb and the Doctor are going to leave for Jupiter Station. Tuvok is already gone and the others will follow." First tears spilled down her cheeks. "The family is breaking apart."

"I'm not going anywhere," he promised with so much devotion that she stopped, silent, and looked at him wide-eyed.

Before she got her bearings back and had the chance to respond, his face fell and he turned away, ashamed. "Only a couple of days ago I told Seven the exact same thing." Realizing what he said, he cringed. "I didn't tell you about it but I…"

"I know," she said.

"You do?"

"Yes. Seven told me."

"Great," he said, bitter, and walked to the balustrade. "Now you will never be able to trust me again."

Seeing him hurting made her heart ache. His regret was plainly obvious and suddenly she knew that Mark was right. She would never lose Chakotay.

Contentment filled her from head to toe, and for the first time in her life she felt the peace he described in his legend. It was a marvelous feeling, something she never experienced before and she knew it would last as long as she stayed at his side.

A large smile came to her face but she tried to stay sober and focus. "I'm sure you meant what you said," she said, softly, closing the distance between them. "That was in a former life. You couldn't have known we would actually make it back to the Alpha Quadrant. If we failed, perhaps there was a chance for the two of you. You liked her."

"I liked the idea of her liking me," he clarified. "I was flattered when she came to me."

"She told me she went to you because she trusted you."

"I'm not sure that trust was deserved."

"Yes, it was," she said, dead-serious. "You would never hurt anyone's feelings."

"I hurt you."

"No, you didn't."

"You can admit it."

"There's nothing to admit. I would've never given into my feelings in the Delta Quadrant. We both know that."

"That's no excuse. I could've said no to Seven. I should've said no," he exclaimed, angry at himself. "Dating her wasn't fair to her or you or me."

"You're too harsh to yourself."

"No, Kathryn, it's the truth," he said, firmly. "I mean, look at it, I couldn't even tell you!"

"You didn't have to tell me."

"I should have," he stressed. "But I was a coward and too afraid of your reaction."

"I would've been happy for you."

"That was what I was afraid of."

She looked at him, blankly.

"I hoped you would be angry and jealous," he explained.

"I was jealous. But I wouldn't have shown it. Not in the Delta Quadrant anyway."

"And in the Alpha Quadrant?"

"You would've walked the plank."

Her remark took him by surprise and he couldn't help but chuckle and his anger evaporated.

Taking a playful glance over the railing, he flinched. A few yards under the balcony were thorny rose shrubs. "Is there another way to make it up to you?"

She inched closer to him. "There is," she grinned, devilishly.

He couldn't believe what he saw. "Are you really forgiving me that easily?" he needed to ask.

"I am."

"Why?"

"Because I made my fair share of wrong decisions, too."

He shook his head in disbelief. "I don't know if I can forgive myself."

"I know you can."

"You seem to be pretty certain."

"I am."

"Perhaps I should trust your judgment then," he smiled while she still came closer.

"You better."

Standing face to face, he searched her face in wonder. "What I have I done to deserve you?" he asked, his heart full.

"I asked myself that same question a thousand times. I don't know the answer, but what I know is that I don't want to live a single day without you. I love you, Chakotay."

"I love you, too. I loved you from the moment I met you."

Her face brightened like the sun and drawn towards each other, they wanted the moment to last.

"I've dreamed of doing this for a long time," he whispered against her mouth.

"As have I."

Not wanting to wait any longer, they closed their eyes and their lips met. She trembled under the light touch and he reached around her, holding her close. Feeling safe in his embrace, she put her arms around his neck and deepened the kiss.

Parting, they rested their foreheads against each other, smiling, blissfully happy.

"Kathryn," he said without letting her go. "Do you think your mother and sister could spare you for one more night?"

Her heart did a double take and long forgotten parts in her belly came to life. "I'm sure they can. Why?"

"The past two nights… they weren't like I imagined our last night on Voyager."

"Me neither."

"I have a bottle of Antarian cider saved for this occasion. We could go to your quarters and empty it."

"I love the idea." She touched his face, looking deep into his eyes. "And I love you."

Raising her lips to his, she hungrily kissed him again.

He couldn't believe his luck. Until minutes earlier, he thought he had missed the opportunity of ever being with Kathryn, and now she was in his arms, kissing him in the most sensual way. Her lips were soft and warm, and when she opened her mouth a sweet taste of coffee and chocolate welcomed him. He couldn't get enough of it and his hands roamed over her face and tangled in her hair, pulling her close.

She moaned into his mouth and he broke the kiss, breathless.

"God, I'm glad I didn't know what this was like," he panted.

"Couldn't have concentrated on your work, Commander?" She arched an eyebrow.

"Not a minute."

She smirked. "I knew there was a reason why we waited."

"Very good decision," he nodded and put some space between them to cool down. "Even if some of our friends don't understand it."

"Who?"

"Mark, for example."

"You talked to Mark about us?" she asked, surprised.

"Yes."

"I had a feeling you two got along pretty well."

"I never thought I'd say this, but I like him. By the way, he invited us to dinner at his house next week. He said that I'm your 'entry ticket'. Do you have any idea what that means?"

She grinned. "That means that I'm taken…" His heart skipped a beat. "…and his wife doesn't have to be jealous."

"Does she have a reason to be?"

"Not at all. We're just friends."

"You said that about us too."

"True." Her grin grew. "But that was a lie."

He shook his head and put a lost stray of hair behind her ear, another thing he had always dreamed of doing. "I get the feeling that I don't know everything about you."

"Your feeling is right," she said and he loved the wicked gleam in her eyes. She appeared younger, freer.

"And here I am, foolish enough to think that I knew what I've gotten myself into," he heaved a mocked sigh.

"Oh, you have no idea," she said, deviously.

"Do I still have time to run?"

"No."

In a quick move, she reached around him and pressed her body against his. As she took his mouth into a searing kiss, every coherent thought vanished from his brain and he got lost in her touch and scent.

Seven years of unresolved tension went into the kiss and the next thing he knew was that they broke the kiss, gasping for air.

"Very good decision to not do this on Voyager," he said between gasps.

She laughed a deep belly laugh. "I'm glad you see it that way."

"Totally." He touched her face softly. "I mean it, Kathryn, it was the right thing not to get involved," he said, seriously.

She nodded. "I know, but it was extremely difficult sometimes."

"That is over now."

Tears of joy filled her eyes and she tilted her head to the side. "I love you."

He smiled all over his face. "I love you, too."

They kissed again, tenderly this time.

Stepping apart, he extended his hand. "Ready for one last night on Voyager?"

"We can't just leave," she objected and took a glance through the glass doors at their crew.

"I don't think they mind. Many of them will stay the night on Voyager anyway and we will see them all during the next couple of weeks at the official gatherings."

He had a point, she thought. She had to let go, it was time to take her own life into her hands.

Fortunately, her life was standing right in front of her, waiting for her to make a decision. Smiling widely, she took his hand and linked their fingers. "Ready," she said, strong and sure.

He squeezed her hand, and standing side-by-side, she tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Voyager. Two to beam up."

The End

In that book which is my memory,

On the first page of the chapter that is the day when I first met you,

Appear the words, 'Here begins a new life'.

[La Vita Nuova – Dante Alighieri]