Chapter 5.
It felt hard to breathe. Mike wished for the millionth time that he would pass out. But he just laid there on his stomach and waited. He just felt so disappointed. He had thought that Harvey would pay the ransom for him. He had really thought that he would. But he wasn't worth it? Was that really true?
He had a hard time calming down again. It was hard to breathe because his nose was stuffed now. He thought that he had stopped crying at least. Eventually he felt a bit better. Everything was still absolute crap, but maybe it wasn't that bad. What if they had been lying to him about Harvey? What if they just wanted to hurt him by saying that Harvey wouldn't pay. It certainly had worked. But he couldn't give up on Harvey, he couldn't. And Donna. He thought of Donna now. She wouldn't give up on him. Donna would help him too, and she would make sure that Harvey did everything he could. He needed to have faith that they would come for him. Harvey liked him; he knew that.
Mike jerked a little when he heard how the door yet again opened on the other end of the room. He tensed as footsteps started coming closer to him, but he remained where he was, unmoving. It was only one of the guys this time. What was it now? Why couldn't they just leave him alone?
Mike turned his head to look at the man. He had his phone in his hand and used it as a flashlight. It was the guy that sucked at English. He had something in his other hand, but Mike couldn't see what it was. It unnerved him a lot when the man sat down on the floor next to him. He placed his phone on the floor next to him. The guy smiled at him in the light of it and Mike shuddered involuntarily. There was something in this man's smile that gave Mike the creeps.
The man just sat there and watched him. Mike swallowed hard.
"What do you want?" He asked.
The man watched him. "You pretty." He said then. Mike glared at him.
"Get the hell away from me!" He exclaimed. This wasn't good. He glanced towards the door. It was still only the two of them in the room.
Then the man stretched out his hand and stroke Mike along his cheek. Mike flinched and tried to move away. His heart was beating hard in his chest.
"Stop it!"
"You quiet."
"Screw you! Don't touch me." Mike tried again as the man yet again stroked his cheek. Then his hair.
Mike screamed at him again and tried to heave himself away. Then something hard and sharp suddenly pressed hard against his neck. Mike stilled.
"Good." The man said. He then held up a small kitchen knife in front of Mike, so that he could see it clearly in the sharp light from the phone.
"You stay still." The man said. Mike ignored him, he tried to move away when the man's hand came towards his head again.
"Stop it!" He screamed when the guy yet again stroked his hair. The hand moved down along his head to his neck and the man rested his hand against it. Mike shook his head the best he could. Damn it! What the hell was this guy doing?
Mike screamed for him to stop again. The hand squeezed his neck a bit. Mike squirmed and tried to lean his body down towards his feet, not caring that he scraped his face on the floor in the process. But the guy wouldn't let him. He changed his grip to grab hold of Mike's throat instead. He started squeezing. Lightly at first but then harder the more Mike struggled. When Mike stilled, he pushed hard a bit before he let go. Mike coughed and panted. He was shaking, both from adrenalin and fear.
"What the hell are you doing?" He exclaimed. "You won't get any money with me dead."
"I not kill you." The man whispered. "You stay still."
"No, I won't!" Mike screamed and again tried to squirm away from the man. Again, something sharp was placed at his neck. The knife. The guy pressed it hard just below his chin. Mike felt it dig into his skin when he swallowed. He moaned and tensed as he tried to move his head away from the pressure.
"You stay still." The man repeated again, and suddenly made a quick movement with the knife. Mike felt a burning sensation and then something wet started to run down his throat. He had actually cut him!
He felt his eyes burn as he focused his attention on his neck. It didn't seem to be that deep. But now he was really scared. The guy must know what he was doing. That cut was deliberate. And now the sharp end of the knife rested just above the cut. He stayed still.
"Good." The man said and Mike felt tears form at his satisfied tone. He shuddered when the man put his other hand back on his head. He stroked Mike's hair a few times before the hand traveled down past his neck and to his shoulders.
He kept the pressure on the knife, forcing Mike to lay there with his head slightly tilted upwards.
The hand stroked his shoulders, along down his arms, fingered the rope around his wrists.
Mike whimpered a little when the guy started stoking the lower half of his back, pushing up his shirt so that he touched his skin. Mike couldn't stop shaking. He didn't want this. He didn't! He wanted the man to just stop and get out. Preferably tripping and landing on his knife in his way out.
As it was now, he could just lay there as this monster touched him. His hand was cold and hard against his skin. Mike was breathing hard.
"Stop it. Just stop." He whispered. "Don't touch me." He hated how weak he sounded. The man ignored him. To his surprised the hand moved away from his back. His shirt was pulled back down and it was like the man made an effort in straighten it out. Mike let out a shuddering breath of relief. Thank God. He just waited for the knife to be removed as well.
It wasn't. Suddenly the man's hand yet again was on his back.
"Noo…" Mike moaned as the hand traveled lower than that. Mike tensed his whole body as the hand pressed down.
Tears fell from Mike's eyes as he heard the guy moan a bit and breathe harder. He pressed harder, pinched and pushed.
"Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it…" Mike pleaded. "Please just stop. I don't want… just stop. Please…"
They guy didn't. It was as if time stood still. But suddenly a sound, from the other end of the room. The lights turned on. The guy jerked and removed his hand. He quickly removed the knife as well and it brushed against Mike's throat, cutting him again.
"What the hell are you doing here?" it was the leader. He was coming up to them and the guy next to Mike scrambled up to his feet.
"Next time." Mike heard him mumble.
Mike stayed absolutely still as he listened to the men next to him. His heart was beating so hard in his chest it was almost like it drowned out their words. He heard a sound that sounded like a fist against flesh and then a groan. The leader yelled in their language and Mike shuttered at the volume of it. He heard footsteps the walking towards the door. It opened and closed.
"What did he do to you?" The guy still in the room suddenly asked close to Mike. He jerked a bit and tried to move away.
"He cut you? Let me see?"
Mike yelled as the man grabbed hold of his face and lifted it upwards to inspect his wounds. He swore and let go. Mike pressed his head down towards his chest and stayed still.
"Sorry he did that. He is an idiot. It won't happen again. But it's not deep. You'll live." He stood up again. Then he just stood there. Mike could feel himself shaking as he just waited. He wanted the man to just leave. He didn't dare to say anything.
"Are you cold?" The man suddenly asked. He started to walk away much to Mike's relief. But he was still in the room. He might still hurt him. He didn't want to get hurt again. Or touched.
He bit his lips hard to stop himself from whimpering when the guy approached him again.
"I got you a blanket. If you are cold." He said. Mike then felt something soft drape over him.
Then he heard footsteps walking away from him. As soon as he heard the door closing, he started to cry again. It was like the sound of the door closing had been like a switch inside him, he just let it out. He couldn't stop it no matter how much he wanted to. He was just as much terrified over what had happened as he was relieved that it was over. He couldn't stop shaking. It was hard to breathe; he was crying so hard.
He wanted to go home. Why was he here? Why was this happening to him? He hadn't done anything to deserve this, to be treated like this. And now this had happened. It was like he could still feel the man's hands on his body. What had happened if the guy hadn't been interrupted? He moaned a bit at the thought of that. He didn't want to think about that at all. But the guy had said that it would be a next time. He felt physically ill. Was he going to throw up again?
He didn't know how long he laid there like that. He was grateful for the blanket he had over him. It felt like it was shielding him a bit, and it also offered some warmth. Right now, it was the only thing he had. He managed to get some of it below his head as well, by pulling at it with his teeth. It helped some to not have to rest his head on the floor.
He felt like absolute shit. He wished he would pass out already. The wound on this throat throbbed and he could still feel wetness around it. Was it still bleeding? That was bad, right? He sobbed a little. He pressed his head down, in an effort to stop the bleeding. He had been held at knife point and touched against his will. He had a hard time taking it in. It felt so humiliating. He cried more. He wished he would get a grip over himself and just stop, but he couldn't. He didn't see how things would be okay again. Not even when he got out, if they didn't kill him. He would never be able to forget this. Never.
Not for the first time in his life he felt a hatred towards his memory. There were things he desperately wanted to forget but was unable to. Instead he could replay his worst memories like it was a high definition movie put on repeat. That was what was happening right now. He couldn't get out of it. He was shaking so badly now that even his teeth were chattering. He needed it to stop. He needed to think about something else. Anything. He wanted to get out of here.
Harvey was going to get him out. Harvey was going to pay ransom for him, and then he would be released. That was what was going to happen. Harvey would help him. He had too. Harvey would help. Harvey was coming, no matter what they said.
He was staring right in front of him. It was dark in the room. He noticed that it was easier to breathe now, however he felt lightheaded. His eyes fell close. He didn't bother to open them again. It seemed like his wish was coming through. He passed out a few moments later.
The next time he woke up he was convinced someone was in the room. He felt confused and scared. He called out a few times, but no one answered. He felt warm and trapped, but then he realized that he had a blanket over him. He didn't move however; he was rather too warm than losing the feeling of protection the blanket offered.
No one was in the room with him. He was there alone. He didn't know what time it was, or if it was the next day. When would they come again? Why couldn't Harvey just pay the damn ransom already. He had trouble recalling how long he had been here now? Was it three days? Or longer? It felt longer. He was done with it now though. He didn't want to feel like this anymore now. And he certainly didn't want to be kept like this another minute! But it was nothing he could do about the situation and it was so stressful. It felt like he was about to panic, just like when he found out that Jessica knew his secret.
He wondered if Harvey went to Jessica with this. What if she said no to it all? But he didn't think she would, sure she didn't like him, but she wouldn't let him die. She wouldn't.
Why wasn't anyone coming? He wanted them to come and save him now. He got tears in his eyes, because no one came.
He slept an hour or so. He felt so exhausted from worrying so much. He felt like he was on edge the entire time he was awake, and eventually he couldn't take it anymore and he fell asleep.
He just lay there. He felt so weak now. He tried to not think about food. If he started doing that, everything would be so much worse. He wanted something to drink as well. If they had poured water on the floor at this moment, he would have drunk it. No one came. He was so alone. His shoulders really hurt. His throat stung. He didn't know if he ever had been this miserable and scared.
He couldn't stop thinking about what that man had told him right after he was interrupted, next time, he had said. He was planning on returning. He wanted to continue to molest him. He would be able to do so. Mike couldn't defend himself at all. He would do worse things then.
He slept some again. He didn't notice when he fell asleep. He woke up from a nightmare though. Everything was still the same, and he would rather go back to the nightmare than be awake like this. At least the nightmare would end. This didn't seem like it would. Why was no one coming for him? He wanted someone to save him now. Why couldn't they save him? Harvey, Donna or anyone.
It felt like it was hard to breathe now. He had tears in his eyes again. What if no one would come? What if not even his kidnappers returned again? It felt like they had been gone a long time now. What if Harvey had paid his ransom and they just took the money and left. Or what if he didn't pay and they figured that they could just leave him here then.
What if he would die here? He might starve to death. That scared him immensely. He couldn't help but make whimpering noises. He felt pathetic, hearing himself making them. He wanted to call out for help, but it was pointless. He didn't have the energy either.
Time passed so slow. He just laid there on the floor, consumed by horrible thoughts, scared and in pain. It was so dark too. If he just was able to see something it would be more bearable.
He barely reacted when they arrived again. His heart started to beat faster at once, but when he heard their voices, he didn't bother to keep his eyes open in the sudden light. He felt himself shaking as they walked up to where he was laying. They stopped around him, standing there towering over him. He wanted to cry but tried not to. He didn't move. He hoped that they wouldn't kick him or something. They were talking to each other, but he couldn't understand it.
Mike wanted them gone. He wished they would just release him now. Why wouldn't they do that? Couldn't they see that he had had enough? But they probably didn't care. Why would they?
He heard movement close to him and he couldn't stop himself from moaning, when he realized that someone bent over him. He hated himself, but he was just so terrified of what they would do to him now.
"Come on, open your eyes." The guy that seemed to be the leader said.
Mike did what he asked.
"You want some water?" The guy was kneeling next to him with a water bottle in his hand. Mike silently nodded. He watched how the guy unscrewed the cap it the bottle and then brought it up to his mouth. At first it almost hurt to swallow, his mouth was so dry, but then he felt how the liquid ran down his throat and it was one of the best feelings that he had had. He gulped it in and tried to drink as fast as he could. The guy didn't let him do it for that long though.
"Yeah, that's enough." He said and took the bottle away.
Mike wanted to plead with him to give him more, but he didn't. Instead he bent his head down as much as he could, away from the guy. He just laid there. The guy walked away again. Mike just waited. He wished they would leave him alone. Time passed. He could hear them talking. Luckily no one was bothering him.
The water he had gotten had helped some. He felt a little better and painfully turned to lay on his side, so that he was facing the men by the table. He didn't want to be with back against them under any circumstances.
He dragged his legs as close to his body as he could. He could feel how his arm was getting numb, worse than earlier.
He could see that they had brought a computer with them this time and they were gathered around it. Mike just laid there and watched them. He didn't know for how long they stayed in the room with him. It might have been an hour. They seemed to have some sort of an argument once and Mike jerked once when the leader guy yelled at another.
Mike could see the guy that had come alone to him clearly. It was awful to just see him sitting there on a chair, sometimes laughing at something someone said. Mike hated him for laughing. He shouldn't get to do that, not after what he had put Mike through. He deserved to die or something similar to that. That was Mike's personal thought. Suddenly the guy turned his chair to the side so that he was facing straight towards Mike. He smiled when he met Mike's eyes.
Mike didn't know what to do then. He adverted his eyes and felt how they teared up from fear. He was scared, he was really scared of this man. He felt so weak realizing that. He yet again wished for someone to come and help him now, to get him away from here. He couldn't help but feel betrayed when that yet again didn't happen in the next few minutes.
He couldn't bear to look at them anymore after that, afraid of meeting the eyes of the guy again. He just laid there, curled up. He was shaking, almost like he was freezing, but he didn't feel that cold. He was just about to fall asleep when he was alerted by the movement from the men. They were all walking towards him!
His whole body jerked, and he couldn't help but moan from the pain it caused his shoulder. He wished they wouldn't do anything. Luckily, they didn't. They just walked past him, out the room, shutting the lights off after the. It was like he wasn't even there.
He curled even more into himself as darkness spread all around him. He screwed his eyes shut. He just had to wait now. If he just could disconnect himself from all of this. Not think about anything. That would be great. He was stupid though if he really thought that would work, because it really didn't. Even though he was alone now, he couldn't stop shaking. His heart was beating hard in his chest and he fought to keep his eyes closed.
He didn't know why he was feeling this way. He didn't recognize himself. He was so scared. He was terrified. What scared him most was the thought of that guy coming back, he had said that he would. Sure, he had been stopped by the other guy, but that wasn't a guarantee that he wouldn't be back. If he came back, there was nothing that Mike would be able to do about it. Nothing at all. He didn't think he had the energy to try and fight back. He felt weak. If he came back, all he could do was to just lay there and take it, wait it out. Endure it. The man would be able to do whatever he wanted with him. Mike was at his mercy. What if he killed him as well? What if he just didn't care about the ransom and just killed him? It was a possibility. He didn't want to think about it. He didn't. He needed to stop.
He bit his lip hard to not make any noises as he yet again felt himself start to cry. He felt like absolute shit for doing it. So damn pathetic. He was weak and pathetic. He didn't deserve to be rescued if he was going to behave like this. But he couldn't stop, and he continued to cry, quietly though, with his face hidden as much as he could in the blanket.
He didn't know for how long he laid like that. He could taste copper in his mouth and his lip ached a bit. He must have bitten himself so hard that he drew blood. His eyes felt swollen and he could hardly breathe through his nose. He felt cold now. He moaned to himself. He wished again that Harvey would come. Or maybe Donna. She would take care of him. He knew she would. Maybe she would give him a thicker blanket and something warm to drink. Or something to eat, he wanted that more. He flashed back on the first time he saw her, at that hotel when he was trying to ditch the cops. She had let him in to see Harvey. After that he started to go through every conversation, he had had with her, all their interactions, one at the time. It helped in calming him down. If he just focused hard enough on the memories it was almost like he was there again. He decided to do the same with Harvey, if he couldn't fall asleep before then.
-SUITS-