A More Bearable Version Of Hell
Fri, July 24, 11:07pm
Churro
Bokuto
Its been 2 days bro
You okay?
Burntkuto has changed chat name to Hell. This is hell. Why? Because Akashi doesnt love me anymore. I cant believe he would just divorce me like that! (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`) My tears are more than the entirety of the Pacific Ocean, my depression deeper than the Mariana Trench, my heatbrokeness more broken than Oikawa's at never making it to Nationals, my emoness worse than ever experienced in any practice or game. How can I go on? Am I doomed to live as a single man my whole life, rejected by my husband and ignored by him as well? Oh wait, he isn't even my husband anymore, cause he divorced me… *wail*
Yeetku
That's… quite the chat name
But ig at least you're talking now.
Churro
Thats not really any better but sure ok
Yeetku
At least his intelligence hasn't gone away along with his will to live
If he's going to be like this, this would be a less bearable version of hell.
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Oop
Yeetku
You're still not helping.
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Like, how do we fix him?
Duct tape?
WD40?
Churro
You have to do something that our Lord and savior Akaashi would do
Something magical
...or something
Yeetku
I think the only fix is to bring Akaashi back
Bokuto better not be lurking
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
I'll summon him back
Churro
Do you really think it'll work?
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe added Savior Akaashi to Hell. This is hell. Why? Because Akashi doesnt love me anymore. I cant believe he would just divorce me like that! (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`) My tears are more than the entirety of the Pacific Ocean, my depression deeper than the Mariana Trench, my heatbrokeness more broken than Oikawa's at never making it to Nationals, my emoness worse than ever experienced in any practice or game. How can I go on? Am I doomed to live as a single man my whole life, rejected by my husband and ignored by him as well? Oh wait, he isn't even my husband anymore, cause he divorced me… *wail*
Yeetku
Akaashi.
Savior Akaashi
Why did you summon me.
Yeetku
We need you to do emergency damage control. Bokuto broke and we can't fix him
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Work your magic Akaashi!
Churro
I need you to save my bro!
Savior Akaashi
Fine. But only because it's annoying that he's being depressed because he thinks I don't love him anymore and it might affect volleyball.
Bokuto.
Churro
Bro! Brobrobrobrobro!
Savior Akaashi
Bokuto. Get back here please
Burntkuto
Akaashi my love ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)･ﾟ･｡
Please come back to me…
Give me another chance..!
Savior Akaashi
Don't tell me you left to go into full out emo mode because you think I divorced you and don't love you anymore. I'm perfectly fine with you pretending to be my husband if you play good on the court so I can give you tosses.
Burntkuto
Akaashi…
*sniffle*
I love you so much…
Churro
Bro are you with us again?
It was scary losing you there for a bit
Yeetku
Can someone change the chat name?
Churro
Why is that what you're concerned about?
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe changed chat name to We Love You Brokuto
Yeetku
Very kind, but I think we can do better.
Yeetku changed chat name to Bokuto's Therapeutic Session with Akaashi
Savior Akaashi
I suppose that's an accurate description. As long as Bokuto is happy it's ok ig
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
*Sniff* that's so considerate Akaashi
Savior Akaashi
I try.
Burntkuto
We're still together right?
Savior Akaashi
Sure.
Burntkuto
Awwww, ilysm Akaashi
(人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+
Savior Akaashi
You too. I'm gonna go now
Churro
Thank you so much Akaashi!
Forever indebted to you for saving my bro
Burntkuto
I love you Akaashi
(*˘︶˘*).｡*
Yeetku
Thanks for fixing him and arriving when summoned.
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Thank you so much Akaashi!
Savior Akaashi
You're welcome. Bye
Churro
You should probably stay in the chat and be on call.
Savior Akaashi
Okay.
Churro
You good Brokuto?
Burntkut
I'm wonderful
Amazing
Perfect
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
I'm so glad he's better cause it's weird when bokuto isn't here
Churro
I agree
I MISSED MY BRO
Burntkuto
BRO
Oh yeah, so my sunburn doesn't hurt anymore, but it started peeling yesterday
Churro
Resist the urge to peel it
Resisssssttttttttttt
Burntkuto
Sorry man I already did it
I thought that maybe peeling away the skin would help me peel away my depression
Turns out that my lovely Akaashi is the only cure for me (・∀・)
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
How sweet (๑◡๑)
Yeetku
That's not how it works…
Churro
Beautiful analogy
Heartwarming story
Amazing diction
A+++++++
Burnthuto
Thank you bro
Now if only my English teacher would say that to me too ಥ_ಥ
Churro
One day bro
One day she will come to recognize your talented writing ability
Yeetku
From what I've seen his writing literally looks like chicken scratch
I'm not surprised she grades his handwritten stuff poorly
Actually nvm you probably just get bad grades cause ur stupid
TikTok Obssesed Giraffe
DANGGGGGG
That was cold
Burntkuto
You're right. I'm dumb. I'm unfit to be around you smart people. Don't hang out with me anymore!
Savior Akaashi
Oh no. He's gone in emo mode
It's ok Bokuto, at least ur good at volleyball
Burntkuto
Hey hey hey! Youre right! I'm one of the top aces in Japan!
Churro
Akaashi must be a freaking psychic if he can literally fix bokuto in like .2 seconds
Also where did you randomly appear from?
I thought you left
Savior Akaashi
Well I did but I'm back now
Burntkuto
Bro it's cause he's my magical husband.
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Lol he's ✨magical✨
Churro
Magical~
Wow~!
Burntkuto
My magical husband
*Proud vibes*
Yeetku
Your husband must love owls
Burntkuto
Oh yes
Proud of my owl heritage
Churro
Much pride
Burntkuto
So proud bro
Churro
Yes bro
Burntkuto
Bro
Churro
Bro!
Burntkuto
BRO!
Churro
B R O !
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
ALFASKFJAJD
Churro
U good?
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Hold up.
Are we just gonna ignore this?
[Burntkuto
Awwww, ilysm Akaashi
(人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+
Savior Akaashi
You too. I'm gonna go now]
Yeetku
What are we ignoring?
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
SO WE WERE!?
We were going to IGNORE the fact that akaashi said he loved bokuto back!?
Burntkuto
ALFHAKFJAK
I NEVER NOTICED
OMG I LOVE YOU TOO AKAASHI
Churro
Bro, the ship has sailed.
Burntkuto
Yes bro(≧∀≦)
Savior Akaashi
I think I'll take this as a sign to leave
Burntkuto
Noooo
Stayyyyyy (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾
Churro
Yeah cmon man
Savior Akaashi
Ok fine
Whatever I'll stay
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
. ?u_code=d7eh9462if22ae&preview_pb=0&language=en&_d=d812m2239a38el×tamp=1589948515&utm_campaign=client_share&app=musically&utm_medium=ios&user_id=6719935207962641413&tt_from=sms&utm_source=sms
GUYS! WERE AN ACCEPTABLE SIZED FRIEND GROUP
(athor's note: this will show up better on wattpad since i dont think you can click on links here, but this is a link to a tik tok talking about what sized friend group is the best)
Yeetku
Why is that link so long
Churro
Yeah it's like 4 lines long
Lol
Burntkuto
This group was just meant to be
So sweet ｡ﾟ( ﾟஇ‸இﾟ)ﾟ｡
Churro
Ik bro (இ﹏இ`｡)
Savior Akaashi
Why are y'all being so dramatic. Lol
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
You know, this group is almost too good…
I think we need to make it a little sus
Churro
Huh?
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
The video!
Yeetku
Oh no you better not add some problematic child
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe has added Kenma to Bokuto's Therapeutic Session with Akaashi
Churro
Pudding!
Hiiiii
Kenma has left Bokuto's Therapeutic Session with Akaashi
Savior Akaashi
Oof. He didn't even say a word
Yeetku
That's rough buddy
My condolences
Burntkuto
Dang
Hey if you need me bro you know I gotchu
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Im sorry TT
Churro
Im in ✨pain✨
Yeetku
Oh no
Not this again
Please Lev no
Don't do it
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
. ?_d=secCgsIARCbDRgBIAIoARI&language=en&preview_pb=0&share_item_id=6856619449093459205×tamp=1596596119&tt_from=sms&u_code=d8m4654dd7c6jb&user_id=6748928435449644037&utm_campaign=client_share&utm_medium=ios&utm_source=sms
(Author's note: again, this will show up better on wattpad but its a link to a tik tik with the "im in pain" nessa sound)
Churro
Lol I saw that
Burntkuto
Im confused
What that about
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Well you see
Yeetku
No
Yeetku removed Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe from Bokuto's Therapeutic Session with Akaashi
Yeetku
Finally some peace and quiet
Savior Akaashi
Dang Yaku
I thought you'd just leave yourself instead
Yeetku
Those idiots would just add me back in
Burntkuto
Rip Lev
Hey Kuroo bro, what's the video mean
Kuroo
Bro
BRO
BROO
*sniff*
I cant believe hed leave me like that
Savior Akaashi
He probably just had to use the restroom or something
Burntkuto
U right
And I have u!
(・∀・)
Yeetku
I don't need to be listening to this crap
Goodnight
Burntkuto
What?! Its not even late yet!
Churro
Brooooooo
Im back
Sorry about that had to take a dump
Savior Akaashi
Called it
Burntkuto
Broooooooooooo
Churro
Bro I just read through what I missed and rip Lev
Churro added Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe to Bokuto's Therapeutic Session with Akaashi
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
WHO REMOVED ME?!
Churro
Yaku
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Bruh
Top 10 anime betrayal Pt 2
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe changed Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe's name to Sad boi hours
Sad boi hours changed chat name to Why Yaku? WHY? I cant believe youd do this to me. *sniff* Why you gotta be so rude~ And I thought we were friends! I now understand Bokuto's pain, cuz now I'm ✨in pain✨too (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`) Its depressing. I am now depresso no espresso. *sadness*
Yeetku
Oh no. Not a repeat of this
Savior Akaashi
To be fair it was Bokuto who did it last time and not him
Yeetku
Still
Anyways Lev, how about I don't yell at you as much tomorrow for your sloppy performances? Is that good?
Sad boi hours
You called my performance sloppy *cri*
I AM FUTURE ACE
Yeetku
So you'd rather me yell though more? Ok cool
Sad boi hours
Nononononono
Please dont yell at me
I'm sorry
Churro
Lol wut
Shouldn't Yaku be apologizing to you instead?
Sad boi hours
Ill do anything to be for forgiveness Ill even prostate myself on the ground before you
Churro
What the frick
Sad boi hours
*Prostrate
Yeetku
Dude it's fine, just spell stuff right
Sad boi hours
Look here you-
Burntkuto
Bruh I was like what the heckie
Sad boi hours
I was TyPIng fASt
Savior Akaashi
Make sure to spell right kids.
Sad boi hours
Why don't you guys love me?!
Burntkuto
We do!
Akaashi and I can adopt you! I've already adopted daichis sunshine child!
Savior Akaashi
No we haven't. We can't legally adopt anyone.
Yeetku
This is one heck of a dysfunctional family.
Sad boi hours changed their name to Bokuto Jr.
Yeetku
God no.
Yeetku changed Bokuto Jr.'s name to TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Churro
Bro lemme be the uncle
Burntkuto
Okay bro. You'll be my bro
Churro
Aww thanks bro
Savior Akaashi
As the acting matriarch, it is my solemn duty to say no, we are not adoring anyone.
Churro
Dang, shut down.
Wait a sec, you didn't say you wouldnt adopt anyone!
U just said u wont love anyone
Wait oof thats worse
Savior Akaashi
*adopt
Not adore
Yeetku
"Make sure to spell right kids"
Savior Akaashi
Shut up
Burntkuto
Pleeeeeeaaaaaasseeereeeee?
Savior Akaashi
No
Churro
Bro stop Akaashi always wins
Burntkuto
True
I have a very unstoppable wife
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
That's so wired out of context
*Weird
Yeetku
You made it weird
Burntkuto
My unstoppable wife loves me very much
I love you Akaashi!
Savior Akaashi
You too. Bye
Burntkuto
Okay byeed!
I luv u!
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
SHIP
Yeetku
Really random but I just realized that the gc is still that ridiculously long thing
Yeetku changed chat name to Dysfunctional Family
Churro
Dysfunctional?!
Have u not seen my amazing bro and his husband?
The literal best couple of the CENTURY?
Yeetku
Yeah well as I said before I think it fits
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
Bruh it kinda fits ngl
Yeetku
Ikr
Churro
How did we get from depressed Bokuto to dysfunctional family
Yeetku
It's cause this is a dysfunctional chat
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
I second that
Churro
Third that
Wait where's Bokuto?
Hey is Akaashi gone too?
Burntkuto
He left
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
You thinkin what I'm thinkin?
Oh wait nvm
I thought they were goin off somewhere together
I was bouts be like "SHIPPP" but I guess not ⊙︿⊙
Burntkuto
Huh?
Yeetku
I was like, why are you thinking about that
They're "married" they can do stuff like that
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Yeah ik but-
Yeetku
You're supposed to be an innocent child they adopted or something.
Act like the innocent child you are
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Since when?
Churro
I-
Burntkuto
Uh, I will not stand for my child to be corrupted
Yeetku
I think you're too late for that
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
Like your not the same
Churro
I mean-
Burntkuto
Your not wrong…..
Yeetku
Kuroo broke lol
Burntkuto
Bruh r u okaaaaayyyyy
Churro
Idkkkkkkkk
Burntkuto
Brooooooo
Churro
Brooooooooooooooooooooopooooo
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
No wait stop I didnt mean for it to go herr
Burntkuto
BROOOO
Churro
BROOOOOOO
Burntkuto
BROOOOOOOOOO
Churro
BROOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Yeetku
Make it staaaahhhhhp
Churro
Fiiiiiiinnnnee
Yeetku
Thanks
Burntkuto
NOOOOOOOO
Churro
BROIEST BRO
Burntkuto
BROIEST OF BROS
Yeetku
Aight imma head out
TikTok Obsessed Giraffe
I mean I guess he's okay
OH GOSG ITS ALMOST ALREADY 1AM
WEVE BEEN TALKING FOR THIS LONG?!
Churro
Oh wow
Time flies when ur with ur bro
Tiktok Obsessed Giraffe
IKR
im goin to bed now
Nighty night
Churro
Aight
I think imma go to bed too now
Burntkuto
Goodnight bro
Churro
Sweet dreams bro
Burntkuto
Night bro
Churro
Bye bro
Burntkuto
Sleep tight bro
Churro
Dont let the bed bugs bite bro
Yeetku
Go to sleep bro.