'Where have you been?' She asks, sitting up and turning the lamp on, glancing out of the window as a blanket of darkness had appeared since she last fell asleep. She'd been worried so the pair hadn't moved from the living room, just in case something had happened to him and the police came knocking. She knew it was irrational but that didn't matter, not one bit. She was worried.

She had known he wouldn't be happy, but she couldn't risk anyone else telling him, it would hurt him more. She'd worried that he's gone drinking, she had to take it at face value that he had gone to a meeting. Somehow, she'd fallen asleep.

A dream where she was in the fire and she was crying, watching him succumb to the flames. She'd read somewhere that dreams are where you try to make sense of what is happening around you and she wondered what this meant. A bad sign, surely? These things, they terrified her. Terrifying her so much she daren't google it.

'I brought pizza.' He whispers sheepishly, not making eye contact. He knows he's in the wrong, he shouldn't have walked off, nor should he have told Johnny it was alright to visit Carla, that she'd welcome a visit. That was pure spite.

'Have you been drinking?'

'No.'

'I'm sorry, you know, for visiting him. You have to understand Peter, I was desperate, and I was struggling. I can't help it, it's not like I could see me mam because she's dead. And George is too, not that I'd have seen him. But having this baby, it's stirred up all these feelings that weren't there in 2014. In 2014, my dad he was some lowlife on the Brightwell estate, but Johnny turning up. I can't cope.' She admits, sitting a little taller. 'Rob, you won't understand this, but he's all I have.'

'Look, I've been 'aving a think about it and I'm not angry.' He admits, taking a deep breath. 'I'm not angry, I'm a little bit hurt you didn't tell me, but that's my problem.'

'You're not?' She asks, yawning as she wanders to the kitchen, seeking out wo plates.

'No, I thought I was. I'm not. I'm hurt you didn't tell me but I'm not angry. If it helped you feel better, that's all that matters. Your health, it comes first. If it was helping you, that's all that matters. I don't like the guy, I don't even think you do, but if it's what you needed and it's made you feel better, who am I to judge.'

'It did.' She agrees. 'I am sorry, sorry that I upset you.'

'I'm upset about the whole Tina thing, let me finish before you say anything.' She concedes, grabbing a slice of pizza. 'I'm upset you don't trust me, I thought we'd worked around it, but it occurred to me that I wasn't being fair. I 'ad a chat with me dad and we talked about it and it's made me realise that it's okay, you will always have that there and I can't do anything to change it.'

'I'm sorry.' She whispers, 'I really am sorry.'

'It's fine.'

'It isn't. I'm trying, I really am. I think that's what Rob was about. Trying to make sense of how I feel, he told me how he thought I was mad having a baby with you back in 2014, but he didn't understand, and he never could. That's the problem. He made me feel shit, but it made me realise what's important to me and that's you. Me and you.' She pauses, 'Me, you, Bea and Si. We're a family in our own way, nothing can change that.' He watches her, smiling, as she takes a piece of pizza.

'That we are.'

-CS-

'Is she asleep?' He questions, as she comes into the bedroom, it's early but today has taken it both out of them, if they can sleep before the baby starts demanding her night feed, that would be great.

'She's so cute when she sleeps.'

'You know we're really lucky.'

'I know we are.'

'I meant because she's so chilled, but we are anyway.'

'Don't say that, you'll jinx her.' Her partner just shakes his head, as she places the baby in the cot attached to the bed, putting up the side, slipping into bed.

'I've been thinking.'

'Thought I could smell burning.'

'Shh you.' She grins, moving closer to him.

'I too, was having a good ol' think. I was thinking about what you said today. About having a house with a garden.'

'I was running away with myself. We're okay in this flat.'

'I went to the estate agents today, got a few thingy's.'

'Thingy's? Is that a term.'

'It is now. You know, pictures of places. They aren't leaflets, so I don't know what to call them.'

'Oh, aye.'

'Look, we both know I messed up last time, this is the first thing I could do.'

'Peter, I was tired. I wasn't thinking. Is moving really a good idea? We're both stressed, we've got a baby and everything that goes with her. Jobs, which will require us to be away from her. That extra journey, it will be an extra time I'm away from her.'

'Well we need this fresh start, we do. If it's a longer drive to work, it doesn't really matter. We could probably find childcare on the way to work, so we'd still be with her in the morning.'

'You think?'

'She can grow up, play in a garden. Learn to ride a bike. That sort of stuff. Let's face it, you can't really do that on this street.'

'You have a point' she murmurs, letting out an involuntarily yawn, placing the crust of the pizza on the plate.

'We can discuss this in the morning. I can see your tired. Aye, do you know what tomorrow is?'

'A Monday?'

'Nope.' He pops the P, making her smile a little. 'It's Mother's Day. Mothering Sunday.'

'Is it? Oh.' He nods, as she shrugs. 'I didn't even think about that.'

'Have you ever celebrated it?'

'What with Sharon? Please say that's a joke. Did you celebrate it? We used to-do those drawings at school, but they'd all be put in the bin. Mother's Day, it was just another Sunday in March.'

'You know what it is?'

'No?'

'Mothering Sunday, it was where people went to visit the "mother church" and eat cake.'

'What even is a mother church?' She laughs, turning over to face him. 'You've spent too much time with Ken.'

'Maybe. Anyway, my mum wasn't big into these sorts of days.'

'My mum died when I was five and that is one of the saddest things I've ever heard. Like ever.'

'Are you in a Taylor Swift song?'

'What?'

'There's that song, it's pretty catchy and it goes "like ever" at the end.'

'You're a weirdo. Anyway, I can't believe you never celebrated it.'

'That was my mum.' She yawns loudly, trying to convey how tired she was, pulling the duvet around her. 'Night Peter.'

-CS-

The baby woke up right on cue, 5:50AM. Something that had become part of the routine and her mum was becoming used to it. In the early days, not that it wasn't still the early days, it was worse. A stark wakeup call. She supposed she was lucky, not having the baby wake her up in the middle of the night

As she turned around to sit up, she noticed her partner had disappeared, a panic setting in, as the baby's wails got more and more frantic. She can't help but feel a rising sense of dread when he's not next to her, so much so she has to take a deep breath before tending to her daughter. She knows he's probably got up for a drink, or something.

'Hey, it's okay.' She whispers, as she suddenly hears the shower turn on, letting out a sigh of relief. 'Daddy just got up early, hmm.' She smiles, pulling the baby close and shutting her eyes, pulling a face as a brief pain came over her. 'Hmm, you need to stop that, be less aggressive or something.' She warns the baby, as if she can understand, 'you're making mummy sore and she doesn't want to have to keep spending out on creams or whatever the latest recommendation is. Although, that's probably inevitable.' She muses, 'as long as it's best for you, I suppose. I failed you when I were pregnant, but you're doing okay now, even though it's been hard. I'm going to-do everything in my power to make you feel better, look after you 'an all. And always remember, daddy loves you too and he's been brilliant.'

She's, almost, pleased that Peter is in the shower, spending this precious moments with the baby fills her heart with joy. A precious and tender moment when she doesn't have hundreds of thoughts racing through her mind. Don't get her wrong, they're still there, but she's controlling it. Or trying too.

'I do love you, though, you little, funny, Bumble Bee. That's why I do this for you, because it is best for you. And it's cheaper, but we'll forget about that. Hmm.' She whispers, examining the baby's face. 'I seriously think you're going through some sort of growth spurt. You seem to be always hungry.'

She's too caught up in getting the baby ready for the day to hear the shower stop. She's only aware of that when she's joined in the nursery as she's changing the baby.

'Morning.' He laughs as she jumps, turning around to scold him. 'Sorry.'

'Morning.' She gives him a quick kiss before turning back to the baby. 'Did you sleep okay?'

'Morning Bumble Bee. And yes, I did. I woke up a little early, I hope I didn't disturb you?'

'You know, as cute as it is, she's going to think her name is Bumble Bee, when she gets bigger.'

'It's cute.' He argues, picking her up. 'You want a shower? I've got her.'

'You saying I smell, Mr Barlow.' She teases, 'thank you.' He notices how she's relaxed in the last few weeks and that made the visit to her half-brother worth it. Her health had to be put first, her and the baby. His could come second, he was acutely aware that if he drunk again, he would die. So many times, he woke up needing a drink, when she was in a particularly bad mood or when he was tired. But he knew he couldn't. He'd look around him, revelling in the life he had. The one he'd already lost once because of his vices. He didn't want to die; he didn't want to miss his daughter growing up. With Simon, he'd missed that. He wasn't willing to miss his daughters too. Not when it was preventable.

'Aye Car.' He calls her, as she exits the room.

'Peter.' She mocks.

'appy Mother's Day.' Something about that makes her eyes pool with tears, as she quickly wipes them away, just those words made her feel something and she didn't know why. 'Happy Mother's Day. You're doing a brilliant job and I don't tell you enough.'

'Thank you.' She whispers, disappearing off to the bathroom before she becomes an emotional wreck in front of her partner, all because of three words. Three words that, until today, she didn't understand, but they touched a nerve. This time, she was crying out of happiness. A new phenomena.

-CS-

'Aye, what's this?' She questions as she wanders into the living room, clad in just a dressing gown and a towel on her hair.

'You don't think we could let you celebrate your first Mother's Day? Even if you did forget, I didn't.' She smiles a little, as he passes her a card and a questionable wrapped present. 'Go on then, open it.' She nods, neatly opening the card and reading the message inside.

The message inside is, almost, irrelevant as she studies the picture he's drawn. Or rather, traced, her heartbeat starting to race, as she worries that she'll start crying.

Again.

'She chose the teddy for you.' He grins, as she rolls his eyes. 'When you were with Jane, she told me which one to get you, when we went shopping.'

'You are very clever then, baby girl.' He laughs, as she looks up from the card. 'This is beautiful.'

'Well, I thought you could keep it as a keepsake, mummy. It's not very much, but it's just a little reminder of how small she was.'

'It's beautiful Peter, that must have taken you a while.'

'I had help from her big brother, who told me to wish you a Happy Mother's Day too. She wasn't too thrilled about having her hands and feet drawn around, but she tolerated that.'

'Give 'er here.' She smiles, stealing her from her partner. 'She has the cutest chubby cheeks; I noticed this morning.'

'She is adorable.'

'Are you mummy's good girl? Yes, yes, you are.'

'It suits you.'

'What?'

'Being a mum.' She just lets out a grin, one of pure joy. One he hasn't seen in a long time.

A/N Thoughts?

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