Do You Want It All

"Cameron, present," Miranda instructed. She'd been in the hospital for a few hours and the time had come to perform surgery on Samantha Calder.

The intern finished explaining the procedure to Samantha and telling her about the viable organs. "I've seen them, they're gorgeous."

"And now that we're getting you a new heart and liver, you can flip out like the rest of us," Miranda told the girl with a laugh.

"Like that's ever stopped her before," Joy Calder said making the room laugh.

"And have a baby?" Samantha said looking up at her boyfriend who'd arrived hours ago. He squeezed her hand.

"Yes, of course, and have a baby," Miranda told her with a smile. She and Maggie stepped out into the hallway. "You're ready?"

"I am if you are," Maggie said.

"Then you're more than ready; you're also very prepared," Miranda said, confidently. Pierce nodded and they went to OR 2 and scrubbed in.

Miranda murmured a short prayer just before she went through the doors into surgery. She stepped up on box that she used to give her a better visual of the body cavity. "Dr. Bailey?" Her eyes met a pair of hazel eyes. Joshua Moore. "Fancy seeing you in here."

"Do I need to call security on you?" Miranda asked, peering at the man, giving him a look she knew would scare him and have him backtracking. She ignored Maggie's eyes trying to catch hers. The man stared at her with a shocked look on his face. She smiled to let him know that she was only kidding.

He chuckled. "You had me there for a second. I, uh...I honestly just switched places with someone. I didn't know who was performing the surgery, only the details of the patient. I was just helping out a friend." Miranda nodded. "'Cause I'm a nice guy," he added winking at her.

She scoffed beneath her mask as she made her first cut. The doctors worked together, quickly and methodically, to fix Samantha. Miranda glanced at the young woman, after this surgery, the years left on her life would increase dramatically. She smiled. That was why she did what she did—saving lives. There was nothing like it. The clock ticking, blood rushing, monitors beeping; it was all comforting to her. After she threw the last stitch and wiped a little blood off of Samantha's stomach, the General surgeon stepped off of her box and went into the scrub room. Maggie followed her. "Thank you so much, Dr. Bailey. It went perfectly."

"I agree," Miranda told the cardiologist.

"Can't wait to do another procedure with you," Maggie said as she dried off of her hands.

"Of course," Miranda said as picked up a towel. Once Maggie was gone, Miranda pulled out her phone and called Ben.

"Hello?" He said in a groggy voice.

"You're still asleep?"

"Miranda?"

"Yes."

"Are you finished?"

"Yes," she said again.

"Where's Tuck?"

"With his father." Miranda examined her hands. "Did you get Jazmin off to school okay?"

"Oh no!" He said quickly. "I totally forgot. We slept the whole day through."

"Ben Warren!"

He started to laugh. "Relax. I'm joking. She made it to school on time, went to practice and is now back here—safe and sound."

"Ooo, I could just wring your neck!" She told him with a smile on her face.

"Come over here and do it," he challenged.

"I'm not. I need to go home and get some rest."

"You can't rest here?" He said yawning.

Miranda touched the handle of the scrub room door. "Now you know good and well if I come over, we won't do much sleeping," she said making herself blush.

"Of course we will. My niece is still here."

"Oh, yeah. I knew that."

"And you always call me the nasty one." Miranda laughed as she pulled the handle of the door and yelped when she saw Joshua behind the door. "Woah!"

"'Woah' what?" Ben asked.

"Dr. Bailey. Now you're really going to think that you need a bodyguard," Joshua said laughing at his own joke.

"Is that Moore?" Ben asked in Miranda's ear.

"Yeah."

"Call me later."

"What?'

"Just call me when you two are finished talking."

"Hold on a second," she told him. Miranda turned to Joshua. "Can I help you with something?"

"No, I just wanted to say good job in there."

"Thank you."

"Miranda?" Ben sounded irritated.

"Yes?" She said sweetly, trying to calm him down. It didn't work.

"Nothing."

"You're very skilled," Joshua said ignoring her phone conversation and lack of conversation just as she was about to respond to Ben's passive-aggressiveness. "Your hands were in so many places doing so many things at once." He leaned against the wall.

"You sound impressed," she said smiling.

"No…" Miranda heard her phone beep. When she looked down at it, she saw Ben's name flashing.

"Shoot!" She redialed his number.

"What is it?"

"You. I don't think Dr. Warren likes you very much," she said, pursing her lips.

"Well…why not?" Joshua said taking a step in her direction.

"I don't know," Miranda waved him away. Joshua dropped his head and left with a small wave of his own. Ben answered the phone, slowly. "Benjamin Warren!"

"Yes," he said stretching out the word.

She chuckled. "Why'd you hang up?"

"You were busy."

"Not for you."

"Seemed like it."

"I'm coming over."

"You don't have to."

"I wasn't asking," she said. "I'm coming over." She disconnected the call and headed to the locker room; her head was spinning. Ben had never hung up on her before. It unnerved and upset her. Was it because she ignored him? It had only been a second or two, she thought. Maybe a minute or so, but that wasn't an excuse nor was it the point. Or was it because she was talking to Joshua? He'd started talking to her first; she wasn't going to be completely rude. She finished getting dressed and drove to Ben's house and exhaled as she called him.

"I'm coming down," he told her before she could say anything. Miranda got out of her car and walked to the elevators.

"Hey, baby," she said.

He kissed her cheek. "How was your night?" Ben asked grabbing her hand and locking their fingers.

She lifted his hand up to her lips and kissed it. His face softened and he looked down at her, his eyes small. "Pretty good, pretty good. Yours?"

"Got some rest, hung out with Jaz, she taught me a few dance moves, we played with my shotguns, then we had dinner." Miranda threw her head back and laughed loudly. As they walked down the hall, Miranda stopped short. "What is it?"

She opened her mouth to apologize. She should have apologized. "Nothing. I…What's for dinner?"

"Gourmet turkey sandwiches."

"Those sound so good. Is the kitchen closed?"

He pulled her in. "The, uh, chef is asleep, but I think I can help you out."

Miranda moved slowly, teasing him. He smiled and kissed her softly. "Aren't you going to say hi?" She asked into his mouth.

"Keep kissing me like that and I'll say more than that." They chuckled and kissed again. In the apartment, Miranda pulled off her shirt and jeans and slipped on one of Ben's t-shirts and a pair of shorts she'd left over there. She walked back into the kitchen. "What do you want on your sandwich?"

"What do you have?" He pointed to the toppings on the counter. "I'll take it all. I am so hungry." He held out a cucumber and put it to her lips. "Trying to seduce me, huh?" He nodded. "Now we know who the nasty one is."

He slid a plate in front of her. "Here you go, my lady."

"Thank you." She took a bite. "Delicious." He tipped his imaginary hat. "You're a man of few words tonight."

"Long night, I guess."

"Longer than being in surgery with a yappy cardiologist?" Miranda asked and they fell out laughing. The two of them talked while she ate. When her sandwich was almost finished, she asked: "Why'd you hang up on me, Ben?"

"Here we go." She shrugged her shoulders. "I was just tired. It was unnecessary and I'm sorry."

"No. I don't accept."

"Miranda…"

She sighed. "Is this about Moore?"

"Miranda…"

"Is it? Because I don't even know the man. If it bothers you so much, I don't have to talk to him."

"Miranda…" He looked at her, his eyes low. It was a look that turned her on and pissed her off all at the same time. "This is not about Joshua Moore. I don't give a damn about him, baby."

"But—"

"I just think that you talking to him and getting all friendly…" His voice trailed off.

"Yeah?"

"I feel like it undermines us and what we have."

She pushed her plate away. "You think I…like him or something?" She scoffed, a small laugh slipping out.

"No." He made a face and added: "Hell no."

"Then what?"

"Nothing."

"I swear to God if either one of us uses that word again, I'm going to scream!"

The door to the guest room opened and Jazmin walked out. "Is everything all right?" She looked at Miranda then at her uncle. "Hi, Dr. B."

"Yeah, darling, everything is fine," Miranda said giving the girl a smile.

"Hey, yeah, we're good. Go back to bed. You want some grapes?" She nodded. The apartment was silent as Ben reached into the refrigerator and put some grapes into a bowl. He handed her the bowl.

"Thanks, Benji." The girl stood by the counter not moving.

"You're good?" Ben asked her. She nodded. "Goodnight, baby doll." He walked to her and kissed the side of her head.

"Goodnight, Dr. B," Jazmin said walking away slowly. Miranda gave her a head nod.

When she heard the TV turn on in the guest room, Miranda said: "I'm tired."

"Me…too." Standing up, she started to clean off the counter. Ben stopped her. "I got it." She gave in, not wanting to bait him into another mini-argument. Miranda walked to his bedroom and climbed into bed. The air between her and her boyfriend had gone from sensual to sucky in fifteen minutes. "Get out of the bed," he said walking into the room.

"I'm already very warm and comfortable, Ben Warren."

"I want to say something, but I don't want to say it while we're in bed."

"You're not even in bed," she laughed.

"You know what I mean."

"Fine." She sighed, tossing back the covers. He pulled something from behind his back. She tried to identify the item through the darkness. "What's that?"

"Your jacket."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"We can't just leave Jazmin here by herself."

"Baby, she'll be just fine. I promise."

Ben helped her put on her jacket and took her by her hand. They got on the elevator. Ben reached across her and pushed a button with an "R" on it. "Where are we going?"

"Patience is a virtue." He smiled down at her. Miranda slipped her arm around his waist. "Do you still love me?"

"A little bit," she said squeezing him.

They stepped out of the elevator car and Miranda realized that they were on the roof. Ben moved behind her and put his face beside hers. "What do you think?" Miranda was speechless. The view was exquisite—way better than the one from his apartment. She looked over the entire city in Ben's arms. "Baby?" She snapped out of her gaze and pushed her body into his making him groan. "What was that for?"

"Why haven't you shown me this before?"

He laughed. "Because I was saving it."

"How selfish."

"I was saving it for when I propose," he said. She gasped as every hair on her body stood up. "Too much?" She shook her head as he laughed again, kissing the back of her neck. "I'm kidding—kind of."

"Could you stop doing that?!"

"What?"

"Talking about marriage so casually."

"Because I'm leaving?"

"No," she said. "Because I'm not even sure of it."

"And because I'm leaving," Ben repeated.

"And because you're leaving," Miranda answered honestly. It seemed so ridiculous to even mention marriage when he was moving away.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"Okay," Ben said softly.

"Okay," she repeated. Miranda ran her tongue along the top row of her teeth and stared out at the almost impossibly-beautiful scenery. She took it in, inhaling the chill air mixed with Ben's cologne. She loved the feel of his chest on her back and his arms around her body, pulling her tightly, so overprotective and comforting. The stars showered the city, mesmerizing her. If the opportunity arose, she wouldn't mind lying under them and waking up to see that they'd all disappeared except the biggest and brightest one of them all. And then looking over to see Ben next to her—it would be such a beautiful thing. Miranda smiled at her thoughts and appreciated the beauty of the night sky that she hardly ever got a chance to witness.

"I'm sorry for hanging up on you," he whispered in her ear making her eyes open. His lips hit her cheek sending a smallest shiver up her back.

"And?"

"And I know I'm overreacting about Moore."

"You are," she said hitting his arm.

"I know I am. I can't apologize enough." Miranda licked her lips and wondered where he was going with his apology. She heard him inhale deeply. "I'm just getting a little jealous."

"Awww."

"Stop, baby. I'm trying to be serious."

"I know." Miranda turned around in his arms and looked into his brown eyes. "There's no reason to be jealous."

"Ahh, I know."

She nodded, satisfied. "Wait…it's not like I couldn't get him. Clearly he's interested."

"I can't blame him," Ben added with a grin.

"Exactly, but I am a one-man woman."

Ben smiled. "I know that. I know that you could get any damn man you want. You're the total package."

"That's right, but all I want is you."

"All I want is you, too."

"Good. Then that's all that needs to be said." They admired Seattle for a little while before the coolness in the air was no longer an attractive feature of being on the roof. Back in the apartment, Miranda and Ben's limbs were tangled as they smiled at each other with closed eyes. She poked him. "Are you asleep?"

"No."

"Why not?" She asked opening her eyes; she watched him do the same. He was so handsome; her smile widened. Did he stop mid-thought and think about her beauty she was?

"Because, Miranda, a gorgeous woman keeps poking me and asking if I'm awake." She laughed loudly and clamped a hand over her mouth to muffle the sound. He shook his head at her and tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. "Go to sleep."