See Your Face

Miranda climbed into the driver's seat of her car. This was it. Today was the day that Ben was going to be admitted to the hospital. They were leaving soon, but right now they were just sitting comfortably in her driveway. Miranda was jittery as if she were the patient about to undergo the procedure or the surgeon about to perform it. "Do you, uh, have everything you need?"

"I do," he said tilting the passenger's seat back.

Miranda did the same to her seat. "Are you nervous?"

"Not so much for the surgery, you know, but for the outcome."

"Your sister will be fine."

"I'm not worried about her… I'm worried about me," he laughed.

Miranda touched his face and smiled. "Everything will fine. I will be right there watching from the gallery."

"Oh, no, you won't. You can't look into my body, woman."

"What!?" She waved him off.

He sat up quickly. "Sweetheart, I love you, but there are some lines in a relationship that people shouldn't cross."

"Watching you have surgery is one of them?"

"Yes, Miranda, okay?"

He seemed so serious. "Okay."

"Promise me?"

"I promise," she told him honestly. She put her seat upright. "Ready?"

Driving past the exit for the hospital, he asked: "Where are we going?"

"We have a little time left." She winked at him. "Plus, it's my turn to surprise you."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes."

"No clues?"

"I think you'll enjoy it."

"You know I can't eat anything. It's past noon."

"That's good to know. Not like I'm a surgeon or anything." He laughed at her snarky comment. At a red light, she reached over and rubbed his head. She smiled at the effortlessness of it. She used to overthink everything when it came to their relationship, now she just lived and appreciated every moment.

"What are you grinning about, goofy?"

"I'm thinking about you."

"You are so sweet," he said squeezing his eyes shut. The light turned green and after checking that it was clear, Miranda pulled off. "You're really not going to tell me where we're going?"

She sighed. "I don't know where we're going."

"So, you're really just kidnapping me?"

"Kind of." Her heart skipped a beat. After driving for a while, she realized that they were pretty close to a park she used to take Tuck to when he was a toddler. She pulled into the empty parking lot. Looking through the windshield, she could see the wide, open, grassy field where she used to watch her son waddle around as she drank lemonade and played music from her phone. Although those days were rare, they were very enjoyable. It was their spot—when they just needed to get away for a few moments. She turned off the engine. "I'm just not ready to drop you off for a potentially life-changing procedure," she confessed.

"Hey," Ben said touching her chin and turning her face toward him. She smiled. "I will be okay."

Miranda could feel her eyes start to fill with tears. "I know you will."

"Then?"

"I'd just feel so much better if…"

"If what, Miranda?"

She took a deep breath. "If I were doing the surgery myself." He gave her a look. "I know, I know." He opened his door and walked around the front of the vehicle. All she could do was admire his swagger. The way he walked was a turn-on all by itself. He opened her door and held out his hand for her. She grabbed it and he helped her out of the car. "Thank you." He laced his fingers between hers and her body relaxed immediately.

"Just pray for me, baby. And for Ange and Jaz, too."

They walked along a smooth path. A cyclist rode past on the other side of the road with two hands on their phone instead of the handlebars. Ben pulled Miranda closer. "I just saved you."

"From what?"

"That person was going to run you over."

Miranda laughed while looking up at him. "Just say you wanted a hug me."

"I don't have to say it. I can just hug you," he told her squeezing her. "Whenever I want, wherever I want." Miranda exhaled. Her heart was so full. Full. Her heart was swelling. Being with Ben was fulfilling. She could breathe without worrying they would break. She could love without the fear of much for overwhelming him because he loved her just as much.

"Let's go," they both said at the same time. She pushed him away playfully and he pulled her into his chest. They hugged each other in the middle of the path. She inhaled him. His scent mixed with the fresh air made her stomach fill with butterflies. Ben's phone rang in his pocket. He winked at her as he pulled it out and answered it. "It's Jaz. Hey, Ja—What's wrong?" His face fell. "What happened? Huh? I'm on my way!"

Miranda's ear perked up. "What's going on?" She asked as Ben grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the car.

He walked to the driver's side. "I need the keys." She took them out of her pocket and tossed them over the vehicle. "Thanks." He opened the door and stuffed himself into the seat that was mere inches from the steering wheel. He slid it back and drove off as Miranda pulled on her seatbelt.

She wanted so desperately to ask what the emergency was, but Ben was so focused. At a stop light, he looked both ways several times. "Don't," she warned.

Thankfully, he sat back and waited. Ben took a deep breath and spoke quickly. "Sorry, I'm being so weird, but Ange passed out in the car as they were getting ready to go to the hospital, so Jaz took her."

"What?!"

"Yes, my 13-year old niece drove her mother to the hospital. And she's freaking out and I'm freaking out."

"Is Jazmin okay?"

He shrugged. "Shaken up, I guess. I don't know. I just need to get to them."

Her heart was pounding as they rode. She texted Richard to tell him to keep an eye out and be prepared. Ben rested his hand on her thigh and she stroked it. "Everything will be fine."

Ben licked his lips and nodded. "I hope so."

"Positive thoughts," she said as they sped through the city. As they parked, Miranda called Richard who told her where to find Angela and Jazmin. Ben kissed Miranda's cheek before they raced inside. The gesture made her feel… everything. The fact that he could even think about her when his family was going through something—Well, it warmed her; it pissed her off; it turned her on.

"Are they okay?" Ben asked as they walked toward the elevator. He grabbed Miranda's hand, bracing himself for the news. She locked their fingers together.

Her phone beeped and she looked down at it. "They are." When they got off of the elevator, Richard was waiting for them.

Before they could ask, Richard was saying: "Yes, yes. Fine. Fine. They're both fine." He gave Ben a pat on the back as they made their way to the room. "Your niece is safe and sound. And your sister is in bed. And your mom is also here. She's a, uh, strong woman." Ben exhaled and tightened his hold on Miranda's hand. He brought their hands up to his mouth and kissed her fingers. "All we need now is…"

"What's that?" Ben asked. "Whatever is needed, get it."

Miranda rolled her eyes. Her boyfriend was really thick sometimes. "Your liver, Benjamin," she laughed. Ben joined in.

They stopped in front of Angela's room. "And Bailey is correct." Richard's pager went off. He checked it. "Um, don't panic. They're okay. And I have to go."

"Thanks, Richard," Ben said. The older man smiled quickly and walked away.

The two of them stood outside of the door. Miranda waited for Ben. When he didn't speak or move, she said: "Go on in, I'll make sure everything is good on this side of the door. You make sure everything is good on that side."

He bit his bottom lip and, for the first time, Miranda could see fear wash across his face. "Come with me."

"I think you should—"

"Come with me," he repeated. "Please."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah. I am."

Miranda nodded. Ben pushed open the door, pulling her along. Inside of the room, Julia was adjusting Angela's pillows and Jazmin was on her phone. When the three of them looked up, Jaz made a beeline for Ben. "Benji! Oh my God! I was so scared, but I didn't know what else to do. And you taught me a little bit and let me drive that one time. I just tried to remember everything and I was so terrified. I helped her over the thingy and took off." The girl spoke quickly. "Am I going to go to jail?"

Ben released Miranda's hand and grabbed both sides of Jazmin's face. "Listen! You're okay. I'm proud of you. You did exactly what you had to do. And, no, you won't. But no more driving until you get your permit." He hugged her and kissed her forehead. She let go of her uncle and rushed into Miranda's arms. Miranda smiled and held the girl. She watched Ben walk over to his sister's side, hugging and kissing his mother before doing the same to Angela. "Hey, Ange."

"Don't… whisper over me like I'm dead," Angela said softly. Everyone cracked up, easing some of the stress in the room. "Hello… Miranda."

Miranda took a step in Angela's direction, waving and nodding to Julia. "Hi. How are you feeling?" She asked going into doctor-mode.

"I'm ready for my procedure."

"I know," Miranda said. "In a few hours, you'll be a whole new person."

"I cannot wait."

Angela turned her attention to Ben: "So you taught my daughter how to drive?"

He reached for his sister's hand and laughed, "I just… well, I just reminded her of how you drive and told her to do the complete opposite."

"You… know what? Mama, turn… uh, your head." Julia just shook her head, her eyes watery, and obliged. Angela stuck her middle finger up at Ben.

"Nice," Ben said. "Your daughter is watching."

"That's okay."

"I'm going to leave you all to it," Miranda said. She blew Ben a kiss and he smiled widely. Miranda walked out of the room and jumped right in getting things started. She did it to take her mind off the procedures that would soon be happening. Procedures she wasn't allowed to participate in. Once finished, Miranda meandered absentmindedly in the hallway.

"Hey, hey, hey." Someone touched her shoulder gently. Miranda turned around to see Eli staring at her. She blinked. "You're looking ghostly. Are you okay?"

"I'm perfectly fine." She shrugged Eli off and took a few steps away from him. He caught up with her. "I was perfectly fine, now I'm annoyed. And the cause of my annoyance is you."

"There you are, Doctor Bailey," the tall nurse laughed. The lines in his face that she used to know so well appeared and she let go of a small smile. She shook her head. "Now is everything okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Everything is delightful. My boyfriend is about to go into surgery and I'm not allowed to be anywhere near the OR."

"Ohhh, Warren, right?"

She gave him a look. He knew exactly who she was talking about. "Yes."

"What if I kept an eye on them and then I could report back to you?"

"Like my personal intern?"

Eli put a hand to his face. "Or like someone who cares about you and wants to help."

"I guess that's okay, too." He touched her back and walked away. Miranda's phone rang in her pocket and she immediately recognized it as a number from the hospital. "Hello?"

Bokhee's voice came in clearly: "Hello, Dr. Bailey, we have an inflamed appendix here."

"Hi, Bokhee. I'm still not back yet. Can someone…"

"Someone else could, but this young man asked for you specifically," she answered. Miranda nodded. "And I'm looking right at you." The surgeon looked around and found the nurse staring at her. "It won't take that long."

"Fine," she sighed. "Who's the patient?"

"Theo Redd."

Miranda went through the patient Rolodex in her head. "I don't know that name."

"His mother was Camille Estrada."

Her heart sped up. "Oh. Um, okay." She looked at her watch.

"Warren's procedure isn't for a while."

"Stop reading my mind." Bokhee laughed. "Send me the room number, I'll be there soon."

Miranda set off to let Ben know that she'd be unavailable until just before their surgeries. She walked back toward the room and looked through the small window. Her heart skipped a beat when her eyes landed on Ben, holding his stomach while laughing. She moved closer and saw two other people in the room, Curtis and a woman Miranda didn't recognize. She wasn't wearing scrubs and Miranda wondered who it was briefly before knocking on the door. Ben waved her in. He hugged her and kissed her cheek. "Baby, I want you to meet Eunice, Angela's good friend and my… ex." Miranda's body tensed up and she gave the woman a small smile and a wave. "Eunice, this is my lady, Dr. Miranda Bailey." Miranda looked up at Ben and saw that he was smiling widely. He was so proud and so silly.

"Hi, Miranda. I've heard good things about you," Eunice said extending her hand.

"Well, Angela is pretty trustworthy, believe her." Miranda shook her hand. The same hand that used to rub on her boyfriend's body. It was a weird thought, but it was all she could think about. She released Eunice's hand and turned to Ben. "So, um… I need to talk to you."

"Okay."

"Excuse us." She grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room. They walked down the hall and she found an empty room. Inside, Miranda turned to Ben and he wrapped his arms around her. "Focus." He put his lips on her neck. "C'mon now."

Ben pulled away and cleared his throat, smiling devilishly. "Sorry." He wasn't sorry in the least. "What's up?"

"I may have an appy soon and so I'll be unavailable for a bit, but I'll be back."

"Who's the patient?'

"Why? You don't know them," she said laughing uneasily. Either Ben couldn't tell or he let her have that moment. She couldn't see herself telling him about Camille's sons. Not now anyway. Mentioning the woman to Ben would evoke memories she didn't want right now. Even though she could sometimes feel Damon's grip on her arms and his basic smell whenever she passed a random man, that was the stuff that she pushed down from day to day. It was a struggle, but she did it and she would continue to do it for a long time. Divulging these thoughts to Ben would get him riled up and take his focus from his sister. That's who he was. But Miranda wasn't completely selfish; they'd talk later.

"Alright. Alright," he said taking her hand and locking their fingers together.

"Alright." Miranda started to walk away and he pulled her back. He hugged her tightly. "I didn't know she was coming."

"Who?" She raised an eyebrow. She knew exactly who he was talking about but had too much on her mind to be truly worried about his ex-girlfriend. Especially one that didn't affect anything that she had going on. The idea of working on Camille Estrada's son was sending her into a small spiral. "What are we talking about?"

"Eunice."

"I knew who you meant, Benjamin."

"Right." They were quiet.

"Are you good? Because I'm good."

Ben's hands rubbed her back. "You can watch the procedure if you want."

"No, I'll occupy myself elsewhere."

"I love you."

"Don't butter me up with love." The two of them traded smiles.

"You're really not mad?"

"About?" Ben touched her shoulder and looked into her eyes. "Do you want me to feel some kind of way that I'm obviously not feeling?"

"No, of course not, sweetheart. But if you want to…"

"I want you to let it go."

"Fine."

"I gotta go." Ben licked his lips. "No, I really have to go."

"Hug me and give me a kiss, woman." Miranda rolled her eyes. Somehow, he always managed to make her feel desired. She gave in to his advance. They kissed slowly. "Mmmhmm. I knew you couldn't resist."

She peeled herself off of him, his smell drifting into her nostrils, begging her to stay. "See you later." Miranda changed quickly and made her way to the boy's room. Her resident, Cameron, met her at the door. "Theo?"

"Dr. Bailey?" Theo asked, sitting up gingerly. Miranda noticed that his little moustache was gone.

She nodded. "You asked for me."

"You really helped us when…" She could practically see the lump in the boy's throat.

"Dr. Bailey!" The carbon copy of Theo said.

"James, right?"

"Yes, ma'am."

The teen was smiling from ear to ear; so much different than the last time she'd seen him. "You two look good."

"Thank you," they said in unison.

"How are you?" James asked.

"I'm doing well. How are you fellas doing?" She put on some hand sanitizer and touched Theo's stomach.

"Theo has a bellyache," James laughed.

"It's not a freakin' bellyache, stupid," Theo groaned.

Miranda chuckled. "Uh, be kind. Who is here with you guys?"

"Our grandma," they said together. "She's in the cafeteria."

"Okay. Well, Theo, your belly is very tender."

"What does that mean?" James asked.

Cameron spoke up. "It means that we don't have to operate right now, but if the antibiotics don't work, we will definitely have to."

The boys nodded. "It really hurts."

"I know," Miranda said touching Theo's hand and squeezing. "And Dr. Cameron will be here if you need anything." She stepped out of the room and took a deep breath. It had been some time since Camille Estrada had died, but Miranda still felt that night. Tears formed in the corner of her eyes.

"Miranda?" She cleared her throat, wiped her face and turned around to see Callie. "You're okay?"

"Of course. I'm fine. What's up?"

"They're taking Warren and his sister in. They're asking for you."

"Both of them?" Callie nodded, pushing back some hair. "Here I come." Miranda decided to see Angela first. She held a mask over her face as they spoke. "You rang?"

"Before I go under. I just want to say thank you." The surgeon smiled. "For everything."

"Angela, this is not goodbye." The woman nodded. "But you're welcome."

"Ben is lucky."

"Damn right he is," Miranda said over her shoulder. She walked out of the room and made her way next door to where Ben was. She got a different mask and placed it on properly.

"You're staying with me?"

"No. I heard you wanted to see my face."

"I always want to see your face," he laughed.

"You look good in that gown."

"Aye, now, not before surgery, baby," he whispered.

"We're ready," Richard said coming up behind Miranda.

Her heart started to pound. It was dawning on her that he was undergoing surgery. And while he had the best surgeon, save her, in Richard Webber, there was a nagging "what if" that prevented her from feeling 100% about it all. The pounding in her chest formed into a lump and rolled up to her throat. She was trying her best not to cry and it was causing a physical pain. Miranda forced a smile and leaned close to Ben's face. "Okay, handsome, I will see you after." Removing her mask, she put her lips on his, sliding her tongue in his mouth.

"Mmmm…," he moaned softly. "I love you."

"I love you, too," she responded as she kissed his cheek.

Her phone rang as she walked out of the OR. "Dr. Bailey, Theo's appendix burst. We're on our way to OR 3," Cameron said.

Miranda scrubbed in with Cameron. "Cameron, make sure that if any messages come in about Dr. Warren and his sister that I don't hear them until we're finished."

"You're sure?"

"Am I giving you the impression that I am unsure?" The resident shook her head. Stepping onto her small, wooden box. The lump in her throat was gone and she became a focused surgeon instead of a concerned girlfriend. She said a quick prayer over the boy's body. "Okay, let's begin."

Working on Theo was so totally different from when she worked on his mother. It was predictable and dare she say it, easy. No surprises. And when she walked out of the room, she was sure that the boy was good and safe once again. Picking up her phone, she saw a message from Jazmin that said they were all waiting in Angela's room. Miranda exhaled; she wasn't sure that she wanted to spend the next three to five hours in a room with Ben's ex-girlfriend, no matter how pleasant the woman seemed. Another message came from Jazmin: Please come. I wld feel better if u were here.

I'm on my way.

Miranda pulled herself together and headed toward the girl. Ten steps from the room, her heart burst. The lump in her throat bubbled up and the tears struggled to flow. A hand on her shoulder turned her into putty. "He'll be okay," Julia's voice said. The woman wrapped her arms around Miranda.

When she finally pulled herself together, she said: "I know. Richard Webber is amazing—taught me everything I know, but Ben's situation is not helping with my stress levels. I'm… stressed."

"How about I get you some tea?"

"Coffee?" Miranda said with a smile.

"No, dear, a cup of tea will sooth your nerves. Trust me."

Julia patted her arm and walked off. Miranda wiped her eyes, slapped on a smile and walked through the door. Jazmin saw her and started to cry. Miranda moved her head, keeping the tears at bay. When the girl released her, she looked at her: "They will be fine."

"You promise?"

In the moment, she looked so much like Ben that Miranda grinned. "No. I can't do that. I'm not in the room, but, in my heart, I know that they will out of the operating rooms soon." Jazmin nodded and then backed away, pulling her phone out.

"You're really good with her," Eunice said when Jazmin put her headphones on.

"Huh?" Miranda was distracted.

"Jazmin… she, uh, she likes you. Like really likes you." The woman smiled.

"Yeah, I like her, too."

"I dated Ben for a long time and we never had that kind of relationship."

"Maturity, hormones…" Miranda waved her hand. She didn't really want to have this conversation; it was distracting her. The surgeon furrowed her brows; maybe that's what she needed—a distraction. "Uh, so, you and Ben? What happened there?"

"Between me and you?"

"Sure."

"It's simple. He's a great guy and I messed up." Eunice looked both regretful and thoughtful. Miranda almost felt bad—almost. If they had worked out, she and Ben wouldn't be together. She didn't like the idea of that at all.

"Well, thank you for that." Eunice laughed and Miranda joined in.

After a while, while Jazmin was taking a nap, Miranda excused herself from the room and roamed around the hospital. Bumping into Callie, she begged: "Please tell me you have something for me to do to occupy my mind until Ben and Angela get out of surgery. I'm going crazy."

"Uhh, I have consult with a 35-year old male patient with an osteosarcoma of the left pelvis, lumbar spine and sacrum.

"Wow. Yeah, that will do."

"Let's go."

Callie and Miranda met with the patient. Along with Cameron, they scoured the scans, coming up with several plans to approach it. "I can't believe you guys are thinking of sawing him in half," the resident said. She stared at Callie, her eyes wide with adoration and admiration.

"Yeah, well, that's how magic happens," Callie answered. Cameron grabbed her notebook and sauntered out of the room. Miranda nodded as her phone buzzed in her hand. Her heart began to race as she saw a hospital number appear. Callie followed her gaze. "I'm sure everything is okay."

Miranda could only nod. "I hope so." She answered the phone. "Bailey here."

"So," Ben said slowly. "I was expecting to see you at my bedside when I came to. So imagine my surprise when I do just that and you're not even here." Miranda's eyes filled with water as he spoke. "Hello?"

Her best friend took the phone from her: "She's on her way." The two of them left the scan room. "I told you."

"Yeah, yeah," Miranda said smiling. "Thank you."

Getting to the room, she milled around outside out of it for a few minutes trying to calm her nerves long enough to go inside. Someone cleared their throat and she turned around. "Everyone else is in Angela's room," Julia said. "He kicked us out because you were coming."

The surgeon shook her head. "He's such a jerk."

"Welp, he's your jerk now," Julia said with a light laugh. She touched Miranda's shoulder as she walked away.

"There you are!" Ben said as Miranda walked into room. He beamed.

"You look good, liverless," she told him.

"Can a donor have a kiss?"

"I suppose," she said moving to his bedside. She leaned down and kissed his cheek and lips quickly. Her eyes glanced at the foot of the bed where his chart should have been. "Where's your chart?"

He laughed. "Webber. He took it. He said you'd ask for it and be too nosy."

"I'm just a curious being," she explained. "How did it go?"

"I'm here so it must have gone okay." He laughed. The same way his mom had. "And… Ange is in her room and we'll be monitored and all of that."

She sat on the edge of his bed. "I'm glad."

"Yep. And it's all thanks to you."

"I'm not saying there should be a party in my honor, but a cake would be nice."

"Then a cake you shall have."

A smile formed on her lips. She grabbed his hand and locked her fingers in his. "Is it upper…"

"I knew I'd find you in here," Richard's voice said cutting her off. "Yes, it's upper midline and it's one of the most flawless incisions I've ever performed and I've done quite a few."

"Well, I guess there's no reason to pat you on the back, you're doing a good job of that already." The three of them laughed. "Can I have his chart please?"

Richard shook his head, annoying her a little. "Just keep him company. Be his… significant other. He has doctors."

"I'm going to remember that statement if you're ever in my position again."

"If that time ever comes, I will conveniently forget this conversation ever happened." Richard gave a wave and took a couple of steps backward before turning around and walking out of the door.

Miranda shook her head, "That man is a mess."

"And totally right," Ben added. He gestured for her to come closer.

"What?"

"Get over here, Miranda. A man is in pain and he needs a woman's touch."

"Any woman will do?"

He didn't miss a beat. "No, ma'am. Only you."

She rolled her eyes and put her hand on his cheek. "How's that feel?"

"Better than you can imagine."

Miranda stroked his cheek and Ben turned to kiss her palm, making her heart flutter. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She took it out and saw that Tucker was calling her which probably meant that it was Tuck. She pulled a chair close to Ben's chair as he fell into an easy sleep. "Hello?"

"Hi, mommy."

"Hi, baby," she said holding back tears of exhaustion. "How's the festival?"

"So much fun. I wish you were here."

"Next time."

"You promise?"

A smile crossed her face. "I promise."

"How is Ben?"

"He's just fine. I'll tell him you asked about him."

"Can I talk to him?" Tuck's soft voice asked.

"He's, uh…" She looked over at her boyfriend to see that he was gesturing for the phone. "Here he is."

"Hey, buddy," Ben said.

"I'm going to get some food," she said to Ben. He nodded and continued his conversation with her son. The imaginary yet stressful weight was finally lifted from her shoulders and she walked through the halls no longer fearful and no longer dreading anything. She picked up some food from the cafeteria and made a pit stop to Angela's room. Jazmin was curled up in a corner and Angela was staring blankly at the TV. "Hey, girl."

"Miranda, hey." Angela turned off the TV.

"That food smells good."

"You're hungry? I can call a nurse."

"No, I'm good," she laughed.

Miranda looked around and sat down in an empty chair facing Angela. "Where's… Eunice? And your mom?" She threw the last part in there to make it known that she wasn't all that curious about the woman.

"Mom left for the night. She was tired. She tried to get Jaz to go with her, but that girl is… stubborn as hell."

Miranda nodded. "She gets it honest."

Angela smiled. "Eunice also left for the night. She wanted to stay as well, but I don't need two babysitters." She gestured to Jazmin and Miranda cracked up, shaking the soda in her hand.

"Oh okay."

"You didn't know Eunice was my best friend, did you?"

"Was it that obvious?"

"I tell my brother that he's an idiot sometimes only half meaning, but then he does something like this and proves me correct. He should have told you."

"It's alright. It doesn't bother me."

"Right. Probably in the same way it doesn't bug Ben that your ex is one of your closest friends." Miranda gritted her teeth. Did it bother Ben? It never seemed to faze him. He and Tucker were friends before she'd even met Ben. Was she being obtuse? Ben and Eunice had history. And it'd bothered Miranda just a bit that she'd been here today. Is that how he'd felt with Tucker being by her side during the accident? Miranda scratched her eyebrow. "I'm sorry. I don't mean it like Ben is envious or that…" Angela took a slow, deep breath. "Or that you should be. I'm just… making an observation."

"I know."

"Don't over think it either; I'm probably still on one from the anesthesia."

"Yeah," Miranda said absentmindedly. The bottle of soda dropped from her lap and hit the side of the bed, causing her to Jaz to wake up.

"Dr. Bailey? Is everything okay? How's Benji?"

"Everything is fine. He's fine. My soda just dropped. I'm clumsy."

The girl giggled: "Oh."

"I'm going to be leaving in a bit, do you want to come home with me? I mean, if you don't mind," Miranda said turning to Angela.

"It's up to her. But she's so overpro—"

"Yes please! This chair is going to ruin my back," the girl said picking up her bag.

"I have to go get my phone from your uncle's room, then change. So, I'll meet you downstairs in like fifteen minutes." The teen nodded and Miranda made her way down the hall. After changing, Miranda hurried to Ben's room with only a few minutes until she had to be in the lobby. He was asleep again, snoring lightly. "Ben?" He stirred a little but didn't speak or open his eyes. "Benjamin," she said, her voice two levels above a whisper.

"Mmm. Only one person says my name like that." He looked over at her with his signature sleepy look. The same one that always made her want to go another round when they were lying next to each other. "Yes, Miranda?"

"Jaz and I are about to leave. Do you need anything? Do you need me to get your nurse?"

"Nope, I'm all good." She nodded. "But you could come over here and, uh, fluff my pillow." He wiggled his eyebrows.

"Don't be disgusting," Miranda laughed and walked over to him. She kissed his forehead, raking her nails on his scalp.

"That feels good."

"I know."

"You'll be back?"

"As soon as I can."

"I love you." He hooked her chin and kissed her softly on the lips.

"You're still drugged up," she whispered.

"The love is still there."

"Well, then, I love you." With that, she grabbed her phone and walked out of the room to meet Jazmin. On the way to the house, they stopped to get some food. After they ate, Miranda got the guest room ready for Jaz. "Thank you, Dr. Bailey."

"No problem." The girl stared at her. "Yes?"

"Are you going to marry Ben?"

Miranda took a deep breath and sat down on the edge of the bed, her toes grazing the floor. "I don't know. Er, maybe not." The girl's face fell. She tried to fix it, but the disappointment was still evident. "Or maybe. I don't know. It's still so early. I, uh… we…"

"He wants to marry you."

Miranda wanted to chuckle. She'd heard that before. "Oh yeah? How do you know that?"

"He told me." Why would he say that? Fool. "I bet you're wondering why he would say that."

"Are you psychic?" Miranda said quickly. She twisted her lips to the side. "But I was thinking that. Go on."

"He said it when he was coming out of anesthesia."

Miranda laughed. She'd heard some wild things coming from people after surgery. And seeing as it was about her, this one definitely took the cake. "And, uh, what exactly what did he say?"

Jaz cleared her throat, preparing to mimic her uncle. "Miranda, Miranda, Miranda… I'm gonna marry her, ya'll. And each and every one of you will be invited. Even you Eunice. And Eunice, sorry. Remember when I thought I wanted to marry you? I know for sure that I want to marry Miranda."

Miranda was experiencing secondhand embarrassment and it made her cheeks hot. "My Lord. Please tell me that was all." Ben's niece made a face. "There's more?"

Jazmin deepened her voice again. "I'm in love with Miranda Bailey the doctor. Doctor Miranda Bailey. She's a doctor."

"Okay, please stop. I cannot possibly take any more." The two of them laughed loudly.

"I even recorded it."

"You didn't?!" The girl nodded. "Send that to me, please." Jaz nodded again. "Alright, I'm going downstairs to check the door and then I'll be in my room. If you need anything, call me." The girl nodded.

"Thank you, Doctor Bailey the doctor," Jaz said with a giggle.

In her room, Miranda's mind wandered to a subject she hadn't thought about in a long while—marriage. She knew Ben wanted to marry her. He'd told her before and mentioned it a time or two over the course of their blooming relationship. And thanks to anesthesia, he'd announced it to his family. She shook her head and dozed off. "Uh, Doctor Bailey?" Jazmin said pushing open the door.

Miranda roused from her sleep with a moan. "Yes?"

"My grandmother is outside."

"She's picking you up?"

"Yes."

Miranda got out of bed and pulled on her robe. She followed Jazmin down the stairs and opened the front door. "Hello, Julia. Come on in."

"Thank you," the woman said. She stepped into the house and looked around. "You have a lovely home."

"I does what I can," Miranda chuckled. Jazmin came over to them. "Ready?"

"Yes, ma'am," the girl said. "Thanks for letting me crash here, Dr. Bailey."

Julia nodded. "Did Jazmin tell you what your boyfriend told us last night?"

Miranda nodded. "Yes, she did and I'm totally embarrassed." The three of them laughed.

Jazmin hugged Miranda and left the house to get in the car. When she was gone, Julia turned to Miranda. "Thank you."

"It's fine. Jazmin can hang out with me anytime."

"No, I mean about…" The woman dropped her head and sighed. When she picked her head up, her eyes were glossy. "I mean about talking to Angela. I don't know what I would do if I had to bury one of my children." A sharp pain hit Miranda's chest and stomach. "And so, I am so very grateful."

"Of course," Miranda told her earnestly. She didn't know what else to say so she just waited, looking into the strangely familiar face of the woman. Her eyes so much like the ones she'd fallen in love with. The ones that belonged to the man that made her heart race ten times faster every time he smiled.

"Okay, so once they've mostly healed, we'll have something at Ange's house and you and your son, Tuck, right?" Miranda confirmed. "You both are invited, of course." Miranda nodded. The horn honked. "I'm going to kill that girl. See you later, Miranda."

"See you."

Miranda showered quickly, put on some clothes and she headed to the hospital. Inside of the building, she stopped in her office for a spell. When she reappeared, she bumped into April, their shoulders colliding. "Oh, Doctor Bailey. I'm sorry."

"Kepner. Apology accepted. And you are really starting to show, aren't you?"

"I know, right? My scrub size keeps changing." The women chuckled.

"I remember that feeling."

"Welcome back, Dr. Bailey," Jackson Avery said coming up behind them. He squeezed April's hip.

"I'm not back."

"But… you performed a procedure yesterday."

"Uh, I think you meant that was requested by orphaned minors. Plus, I haven't been officially cleared by Neuro."

Derek walked by and dropped a chart off at the Nurse's Station next to them. "What's that about Neuro?"

"You folks haven't given me an OK," Miranda explained.

Derek nodded and put up a finger and told her to follow it, starting an arbitrary neurological test. He asked several questions while she stared at his finger. "You're good to go." She gave him a look. "Welcome back, Dr. Bailey."

"Thank you, Dr. Shepherd," Miranda said with a smile. "But I'm not coming back today."

"That's fair," Kepner giggled.

Miranda dismissed herself and headed toward Ben's room. He was awake and watching ESPN. "Hey, baby," she said sitting on the edge of his bed. His arm instantly wrapped itself around her waist.

"Hey, sexy," he responded. He kissed her arm.

"How'd you sleep?"

"I'd much rather have been in bed with you, but it was okay." She nodded shortly. "You?"

"I slept well. Your mom came by the house to get Jaz and we talked for a minute."

"Oh?"

"Yep. And we laughed at you."

"At me?" He looked at her. "Why?"

"Jazmin told me what you said yesterday when you were coming out of anesthesia."

He gripped her body. "Oh, Lord. What did I say?" He shook his head and laughed.

"You told them you were going to marry me."

"Oh. Oh. Oh, well, you know that."

"In front of Eunice." He winced. "And you apologized for thinking you wanted to marry her."

"Holy shit."

"Want to hear it?"

Ben shook his head wildly. "They know I was drugged though, right? Tell me they know that."

"They did, but it was still amusing."

Ben's breakfast and meds came in and Miranda sat on a chair and tried not to interfere as everyone did their jobs. Ben rubbed her hand with his thumb while he ate. When everyone was gone, he said: "Sometimes I forget that I'm about to move away."

"What do you mean?"

"Like just now I was thinking about whether we would get a whole new place or if you'd want me to move in with you and Tuck when the conversation came up."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Do you want me to say something else?"

"An opinion?"

"It doesn't make sense to talk about it since you're leaving, does it?" She took a deep breath.

"I guess not." He took a bite of his sandwich, his mouth full of food. As he chewed, she gritted her teeth. "Babe, we're just talking. Nothing is set in stone."

Miranda switched the position of their hands, slipping her smaller fingers between his larger ones. "Then, I guess, we could get a place that's all our own."

Ben smiled. "I know you're comfortable. And I wouldn't want to uproot Tuck."

"He loves you and would not mind."

"We could stay in your same neighborhood."

"I'd like that," she said softly. She looked over at him and caught him staring at her. He winked. "This is nice."

"What? Me being held hostage to a hospital bed unable to jump your bones?"

She chuckled a little. "No, discussing the future without panicking." She shrugged and turned her attention back to the Top 10 Countdown. "Probably because it's not really real."

It was Ben's turn to shrug. He sipped some of his tea. "Maybe it could be."

"What do you mean?" She said as she watched an impressive basketball play.

"We should move in together."

Her body stiffened and she found it hard to swallow. The only thing that broke the spell was her phone ringing in her pocket. She used her free hand to pick it up. "Dr. Bailey here."

"Bailey?" Richard said, panicked. "I'm swamped, Grey's swamped and they need help with a new patient."

"Um, sure. I'll be right there."

"You have to go?" Ben asked, his eyes glued to the TV.

"Yeah, I do."

"We'll… pick this conversation back up later?"

"Mmmhmm."

"Love you."

"Love you, too." Miranda kissed his cheek and walked out of the room.

Miranda rushed around, jumping back into the swing of things. By the end of the day, she flopped down next to a sleeping Ben. She held his hand and fell asleep watching CSI. "Miranda."

"Hmm?" Miranda opened one eye and saw Ben staring at her. The other eye opened and she saw a tech checking Ben's pressure.

"Go home," he said with a small smile. "Go get some rest, baby."

"I'm going." She stuck her feet into her clogs. "I'm going."

"You're not moving."

"I'm not?" She moaned. The two of them chuckled, their laughs syncing. "My feet are throbbing."

"Want me to rub them for you?"

She raised her eyebrows. She would love for Ben to massage her feet, but she'd feel bad. The man was attached to a hospital bed. "Rain check?"

He nodded and picked up her hand and stroked her knuckles. She tried not to look over at him, sure her heart would burst. It was so satisfying being in love with her best friend. Ben reached over and touched her face, forcing her to look at him. She smiled at him before she leaned over to kiss him. "So, you're going to be okay to drive?" She nodded. "Alright then. I'll see you tomorrow?" Another nod. "Good night, Miranda."

"I love you," she said picking up her phone and her purse and heading for the door.

"I love you, too. Call or text when you get home please."

"I will."

Miranda Bailey stepped into her home and didn't even bother to go up the stairs. She lay on the sofa, kicked off her shoes and drifted back to sleep. A few days later, Miranda was walking through the halls of one of her favorite places crossing items off the list she carried in her pocket. She had just finished her last scheduled procedure of the day and was about to go and pick up Tuck from Tucker's. They were back from the film festival and she needed to get her hands on her son. As she waited for the elevator, her best friend came up behind her and linked their arms together. "Joe's tonight?"

Miranda cleared her throat. "I have to pick up Tuck from Tucker's tonight. I can't."

"I have gossip."

"That's nothing new," Miranda told her. The elevator doors opened and they walked inside. "This hospital is flush with secrets and the rumor mill never gets a break.

Callie lowered her voice as the doors opened again. Two people got on. "It's about Wilson." Miranda shrugged. That was the last person she wanted to hear about. "And Ross."

"I'm confused. Is it about Ross or is it about Wilson?" The women looked at each other. Miranda gasped softly. "Let me call Tucker." Standing in front of her open locker, Miranda pulled her jeans on with only a small grunt. After slipping on her shirt, she texted ex-husband while heading over to see her boyfriend. He was healing well after the surgery and so was Angela. He was even up and walking, slowly, but still making the kind of progress doctors wanted to see. "If you need me, call me."

Ben nodded. "Okay." She kissed his forehead. "Don't have too much fun."

"All I heard was 'have too much fun'," Miranda laughed. Ben shook his head and gestured for her to come closer. He tapped his cheek, silently asking for a kiss. She leaned down and put her lipstick-covered lips on his face. "I'll call you later."

"If you remember." A smile hit her lips and she kissed his head again. She strolled through the hospital and found Callie by the ambulance bay. They walked over to Joe's, giggling at everything. "Now, I'm not getting drunk."

"Right. Just a drink or three," Callie said waving down a bartender.

Joe walked over to Miranda and stood in front of her. "Joe, how are you?"

"Better than Karev," he answered.

"What?" Miranda screeched. "You know, too?! Where have I been?"

"Taking care of your boyfriend and patients," Callie said sliding a drink in front of her friend.

"What is this?" Callie didn't answer. "You're lucky you're my best friend."

"Drink up and listen to this gossip," the taller woman laughed. "So, my wife and I were both on-call last night." Miranda nodded. "We were on-call."

"Girl, you're about as subtle as a toothache."

"Oh okay. And so we're coming out of a conference room on three and who do we see coming out of a supply closet across the hall?"

"Wilson and Ross?" She whispered. Callie nodded. Miranda looked around and didn't recognize the faces of anyone who would be interested in the gossip, but she was sure the shit was about to hit the fan. She sighed. "Wow." That's what Karev got for bumping bodies with a resident.

"I told Alex about de-pantsing those residents." Callie took Miranda's mysteriously empty glass and waved for another refill.

"Wow."

"Yep." The Latina looked around the room suspiciously.

"Ooo, there's more!"

"Yes. Alex and Pierce."

"What happened?"

"Nothing… yet. But they are definitely feeling each other."

"Well, I knew that already."

"You did?"

"Yes, since before that dinner party with Pierce, Webber and Grey."

"Thanks for telling me."

Miranda chuckled and accepted her new drink. "I don't gossip."

"The hell you don't."

She took another sip. "What the hell is in here? I can't taste anything but deliciousness." Callie shrugged. "I'm going to be on my ass later, aren't I?" A smile spread across the woman's face and Miranda shook her head. "This is my last one."

Two drinks later, Miranda was lying in a booth, her head connected to her best friend's. "I'm going to be honest."

"About what?

"That intern… what's her name? Cameron. She is really, really tempting."

"Resist."

"I am. I will. I have to." Callie sighed. "Arizona is the best thing to ever happen to me," she confessed. "I'd be a fool to…"

Miranda heard herself snore a little and opened her eyes. She sat up slowly and saw Callie asleep next to her. We are too old for this, she thought. "Let's go. Call your wife."

Miranda walked slowly into her house and flopped down on the sofa. "Are you going to be good here? Can I get you anything before we head home?" Arizona asked. She gave the woman a "thumbs up" sign.

"Thank you for bringing me home, Robbins."

"Anytime."

After Arizona left, Miranda went back to sleep. When she checked her watch again, it was about three in the morning. She stood up and walked to the bottom of the stairs. There, she paused. Half of her wanted to trudge up the stairs and get into her bed, the one that was once just big enough for her to enjoy her freedom, now just seemed cold and empty without a certain body to keep her warm. The other half wanted her to turn around and get back on the chair, the one that didn't make her feel too lonely if she pressed her body into its back, pretending that it was that same certain body. That certain body that she missed, that she'd been having semi-awkward moments with since he said he wanted them to move in together. Here she was again, Ben making the moves and her playing defense like they weren't on the same team, trying to win the same game. Did she think they could continue their flourishing relationship living in two separate houses? Miranda chuckled to herself. A minute part of her figured that they would, but the smarter part knew that this was next, natural step. But was it too soon? She leaned on the banister still stuck on what to do and which direction to go. A deep sigh left her body. Her phone beeped making the decision for her and she went back to the chair to get it, stopping at her hall closet to get a blanket. The bright light from her phone made her squint. You up? The message asked. Her eyes focused and she was able to see that it was from Ben. Yes… Why? What's u'? Oops. Up.

Nothing. I was just thinking about our conversation earlier.

Earlier like when?

About us moving in together, Miranda.

Sure that this message thread was going to need her full attention, she tucked one foot underneath her. And?

No message came through for a few minutes and Miranda figured he must have gone to sleep and decided to do the same. She got comfortable and was closing her eyes for the third time that night when her phone buzzed again. Baby, I'm sorry for springing the idea of us moving in together on you. You know that I don't want to rush you and I don't want to force you. I just get so excited about our future. You are who I want to do this with. I will be ready whenever you are.

Miranda read the message once and then twice. On the third time, she was found her eyes watering. Call me.