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Once an ally

Chapter 5

"I see the tower" Lyn said as they crested a small ridge. The forest had been thinning for the last several kilometers and the four of them were trying to stay off the path. The ground was damp and muddy from rain that had taunted them during the night leaving them wet and grouchy. Up ahead an old tower stood at once was the south-west corner of a fort that had crumbled a century prior. It served now as little more than a landmark, the loose stones tempting not even the boldest of looters. Alfonse had joked that even Anna wouldn't try to search it for gold when helping Lyn map out their path.

"Any sign of a sentry?" Corrin asked.

"I don't see any movement." Lyn remarked.

"Shush or they'll hear us yapping." Ravus whispered. A few more meters and Lyn held up her hand to halt them, each of the four sliding off their horses. They waited to watch for any sign of activity at the tower. Voices, smoke from fires, the clatter of metal. But after a half-hour wait they felt it was safe to continue their advance. They walked further, the sparse forest now peppered with comparatively young trees reclaiming the land around the ruins. The tower and surrounding land was empty, much to their collective relief. The only sign of any human activity was a cold firepit and some animal bones.

"Wonder if this is where those bandits camped out." Corrin mused.

"Pretty bad spot. No cover." Lyn answered.

"They weren't the smartest." Raven said.

"Not gonna shush us again?" Lyn quipped at him.

"We didn't know if someone was here earlier." he grumbled back and made an effort to walk away from her and look around the tower. Lyn decided to follow Raven, while Corrin and Azura walked around the other side of the tower. The grass had been trampled, and there were more animal bones scattered around.

"I think it was those bandits. Or maybe other idiots." Lyn explained, studying the pattern in the worn grass. It led away from the tower deeper into the woods towards the beaten path the four had been avoiding. "We should take advantage of this set a fire up and dry off."

"Yeah won't complain about getting dry." Corrin agreed. Azura nodded, and Raven huffed.

"We should keep going." Raven suggested, and pointed towards the path.

"Don't be daft. We need to dry off." Lyn countered.

"Good luck starting a fire with wet wood." He snarked at her. Lyn rolled her eyes and paced back over to the entrance of the tower. She entered it, ignoring the shouted warnings from Raven about the bad structure and she came back out dragging a broken chair behind her. She tossed it at Raven who jumped aside to avoid being struck, and came out again with a short table missing two of its legs.

"Here. Fire."

"I thought this thing was empty." Raven admitted. He pulled out his axe and made quick work turning the ancient furniture into kindling. It was damp, but he was confident that it could light. Meanwhile Lyn was busying herself digging at the remains of the bandit fire, removing the soaked top layer. It took the group nearly an hour to get a fire going, but once fully roaring it didnt matter how damp their wood was it dried and caught quick enough.

They stayed by their fire and enjoyed some coffee as a pick-me-up, despite how gritty it was, and got themselves dry enough to chase away the chill and make them more confident in surviving the day without pneumonia. Even Raven stopped complaining about the delay. Once warmed inside and out they stomped out their fire and kicked the embers about to prevent re-ignition and mounted their horses once more.

"You're quiet. Everything okay?" Corrin asked as she rode beside Azura, behind Raven with Lyn ahead of them.

"Hmm? Quite well." Azura answered with a small smile.

"Oh. Umm good." Corrin nodded, eyes flicking back down to her reigns. She reached out to pat her horse's head. "Definitely feels better to be dry." Azura hummed her agreement.

"I rather regret not bringing a book." Azura spoke after a prolonged silence.

"Yeah something to pass the time would have been nice. But hard to read on horseback." Corrin agreed. Though, realistically, she wasn't sure she could keep her attention on a book.

"I could recount a story." Azura offered.

"What are you, a child?" Raven scoffed. Corrin pinched her lips together and let out a hard breath through her nose. Azura nodded and turned her attention back to the path ahead. Corrin opened her mouth to reassure her she would have loved a story, but her voice caught in her throat and she too simply continued following.

One kilometer ahead was the river where they were expecting Xander's army to be making camp. The land sloped up, forcing them off their horses to help guide them through the mud created by the recent rains that had melted the late autumn snow.

"Walking back is gonna suck." Lyn grunted, trying to gain footing. The horses started to snort and resist, pulling against their reigns. "Whoah, hey," Lyn tried to sooth, bracing herself from sliding down and rubbing her mare's nose. She stopped stomping and pulling against her reigns, but snorted and tossed her head when Lyn attempted to click her tongue and ease her forward. The others seemed to be struggling as badly as her. Raven's horse had slid backwards in the mud.

"It just gets steeper." Corrin remarked.

"I don't think we can get the horses up this." Lyn agreed with a heavy sigh. "Look why don't you two scout ahead. Me and Raven will watch your asses and the horses." She suggested.

"With Corrin's arm perhaps it should be reversed?" Azura suggested.

"I'm fine." Corrin argued. "Really. I'm okay." she added hastily at the expression she was getting.

"Okay so you two keep going we'll watch your backs and keep the horses from sinking in this damn mud." Lyn agreed. Corrin and Azura removed their packs from their horses and slung them over their shoulders and tried to tackle the hill again. Corrin tried to curl her toes and dig the balls of her feet to gain traction, covered to her knees in the mud after just a few steps. Beside her, Azura wasn't faring much better. She wore knee-high boots that were far more practical for traveling, and those too were covered.

A few more steps and Corrin slipped, catching herself with her good arm, the injured one wrapped around her chest. Pain flared as she impacted the ground but she grit her teeth together and pushed herself off her injured arm. Mud coated her armor, finding its way in joints soaking her clothing beneath bringing an instant chill. Azura tried to offer her a hand, but was already having difficulty keeping herself upright. She held and arm out nonetheless, but Corrin shook her head and declined not wanting to pull her down with her. She got back onto her feet, glancing over her shoulder at Lyn and Raven and was surprised to not see them laughing at her.

"You all right?" Azua asked.

"Yeah." Corrin nodded. Their progress was slow, both women falling two more times each before the slope became more forgiving and they were able to continue walking. The hill reached a crest and the pair halted before progressing. If the provided maps were correct, according to Lyn this hill would roll down to the Ings River, across which would be the ruins of the fort of which their previous landmark was an outpost of.

"Hear anything?"Azura whispered.

"No." Corrin shook her head, and started moving forward. The fort came into view, and was in a better state of repair than the half-collapsed tower they pilfered firewood from. On either side of the river was the stone remains of an ancient bridge, but spreading across it were wooden planks and supports over the former foundation.

"Look," Corrin pointed, at it and frowned. The next closest bridge in either direction were a day's ride away. Constructing this bridge in the middle of nowhere could give access to the borders of Askr that no one would see coming.

"How long will it take them to finish that?"

"I don't know…" Corrins voice trailed off. She closed one eye and used the angle of her thumb and forefinger to try and gauge the bridge's width and the river's length; and made a mental note to compare it to the width of the river on their maps to get an estimate of the size of the bridge. Perhaps someone back in the camp would be able to do the math and calculate just how screwed they were. "I don't really see any activity." She whispered.

"No, look. Get down." Azura whispered, and dropped down, and Corrin did so beside her. The ground was painfully cold and almost immediately she started daydreaming about the fire they would start that night. and tried to see what she had spotted. A man walked out of the building closest to the bridge, and she squinted to try and get a better look. He was of average height, short blonde hair, and trim build. He wore an unfamiliar uniform, but she couldn't make out the crest on his chest.

"Leo." Corrin whispered, her vision blurring as dizziness washed over hear. Her face prickled and her breath started coming faster. Two of my brothers. She has two of my brothers. Am I really fighting for the right side? What am I doing fighting my family again?"

"Leo." Azura echoed beside her. She turned, and saw Azura's gaze was focused on the man below, her stomach churned recalling a conversation they had.

"You were engaged to him… weren't you?" Corrin asked, swallowing hard.

"Yes. I was." Azura answered. Corrin's gaze went down to Azura's left hand and saw it was bare, and vaguely remembered Azura mentioning a ring.

"You loved him?"

"I loved y-" Azura's answered stopped abruptly. Corrin's heart immediately started to race, a static heat flashed across her face and spread to her ears. "I loved you." She finally turned, her pale cheeks deep pink with red spots speckling her blush. Corrin swallowed, her voice stuck in her throat. She stared at the other woman and tried to get her voice to work. She heard the past tense. She loved me? Deep secret feelings she felt for her dearest friend that she never dared to ask on. Did you die wishing I loved you back? But there she was, in front of her. Alive. She squinted to ease the burning in her eyes and keep the tears from spilling over her cheeks.

"She died?" Corrin asked after a slight stutter. Azura's passive expression broke. Her eyes glazed and her lips thinned as she chewed on her bottom lip. She nodded, glancing back at Leo momentarily before locking her eyes with Corrin's.

"You're alive." She whispered her eyes narrowed briefly and her brow flinched. But her slight frown remained.

"I don't really understand this weirdness either." Corrin answered, a choked cross between a sob and a laugh punctuating her words. "I… I loved you too. I never told you." Her voice cracked again and she shook her head and bit hard down on her bottom lip to regain her constitution.

"We have much to talk about. Perhaps we should be less… distracted." Azura forced a humorless smile and tilted her head. Corrin turned her attention back to the river. Leo was writing something in a book at the edge of the bridge. He got up, and walked back into the building again. My brother.

"I don't see anyone else. Do you?" Corrin asked.

"No."

"Good." Corrin tapped at her neck and felt the familiar chain and stood up, flexing her fingers. "Corrin?!" Azura asked. But already her fingers were extending into large claws, her legs bent backwards and caused her to crash forward. Her head swelled and limbs extended. Her hair curled and spun into hard antlers, her low rumble the only sign she showed of any discomfort the transformation may have caused. She ran down the hill, sliding along the mud and fell. She stumbled, rolled, and clawed madly at the ground. Her claws dug deep into the dirt but slid anyways. She slowed her descent enough that she managed not to splash into the river below. She stood up and shook herself to slosh off as much mud as she could. She dove into the river.

She had expected the water to be frigid, but it was still early enough in the season that the summer warmth hadn't been completely sapped out of the water yet. But it was a far cry from comfortable. She paddled across the water, feeling quite foolish having to doggie-paddle like she had been during her lessons. Azura loved me. She managed to get across, but had been pulled a distance by the current. She climbed up the bank and shook again, water splashing away from her water-resistant scales. Holy shit Azura loved me. Loves me? And my brother is here! I won't fight two brothers! Various thoughts were competing for her attention and making her nauseous.

She charged across the muddy field managing not to slip and stopped in front of the building her brother went into. She lifted an arm and slammed the door open, breaking one of the hinges.

"What?!" Leo called, and scrambled out of the chair he was sitting it to reach for a sword on the other side of the small entry room. Corrin lunged, I'll explain it to him later I don't want to fight my family anymore. She turned her head and grabbed Leo in her mouth, sure to pin his arms by his sides.

"What is this? Corrin? Why… what?" Leo asked. Corrin's stomach lurched again and she needed a moment for the dizziness to fade before she could muster the will to run. Of course her damn brother would recognize her dragon form. She clawed the broken door out of her way, but halted before leaving the room. She saw the book Leo had been writing in knocked over on the floor. She picked it up in a claw and then wrapped her tail around it. Leo thrashed in her mouth, and she knew her gums would be bleeding later. "Are you a ghost?! Some daemon sent to haunt me?!" He asked, voice high and hoarse. He tried to kick her but wasn't able to reach.

Corrin tried to keep her mind straight and silence the endless questions pouring through it. To let herself process Azura's slip and her own emotions later. To process her guilt about Leo later. Her abject pain she couldn't just come grab Xander like this. She ran into the water. She kept her head tilted to the side as she paddled forward to make sure Leo's head was well above water. Her tail was curved up over her back to keep the book dry as well. She clambered out the opposite bank, and saw Azura standing and pacing at the top of the hill.

She let out a hard huff of air through her nose, pausing to catch her breath for a moment. She had never tried to retain her dragon form for so long before and wanted nothing more than to set a fire and fall asleep. But she sighed, and started up the slippery slope again. She tried to go slower this time, and be deliberate. Careful how she moved her weight and gripping the ground hard with her claws and using shallow roots as an anchor. As soon as she reached the summit Azura had her hands on her.

"Oh please use more caution than that!" Corrin rumbled at her and Azura just shook her head. "Leo…"

"Azura?"

"Are you all right?" Corrin nodded, and Leo thrashed more.

"I'm in the mouth of a dragon that looks like my lost sister and talking to a dead woman! No I'm not all right!" Azura flinched at his words, glancing up at Corrin for a moment before she let out a long sigh.

"Set him down please Corrin." Azura asked, but Corrin just shook her head nad nodded towards the other slope. Azura with second thought agreed that it was likely wiser to wait until they were back with Raven and Lyn to keep him from running off. Corrin nudged Azura with her tail and got a smile. "I'm all right, you merely gave me a fright." she chuckled. Corrin's eyes pinched at the edges and tip of her tail flicked in that familiar way that meant she was smiling. They started walking to where they had left Raven and Lyn. She walked a pace then rumbled, nudging Azura with her tail. The woman stepped back and saw the book that was curled in her tail.

"I shall have to read this as soon as we get back." Azura noted, hoping whatever Leo was writing in it was important. As the slope grew steeper Corrin shifted her weight and used her tail to wrap around trees to help control her slide. Azura, already covered in mud from head to toe, decided it was easier to just slide down on her bottom. The pair reached the bottom of the hill to have Raven and Lyn already waiting for them.

"The lizard found a thing." Lyn observed. Corrin finally set Leo down on the ground and shifted back into her human form, and fell back with a grunt. Azura rushed over to Corrin, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Oh my gods… I really am seeing ghosts." Leo said.

"Like you, we've been pulled away from different words, brother," Corrin managed through the haze of her prolonged transformation.

"Was a dragon chewing on your armor involved?"

"I didn't chew on you!" she instantly protested, Lyn pressing a hand to her mouth to stifle her laughter at the indignant look the "siblings" exchanged.

"I am wet and covered with dragon drool, as a prisoner, I demand…!"

"We're all covered in mud and we have no amenities for anyone to wash up. If getting dirty is so uncomfortable, I suggest we get more intel by…"

"Lyn, I don't believe this will be necessary," Azura stopped her.

"We should confirm if he was alone up there. How are we to know that people won't come looking for him?" Raven intereffered.

Corrin wished her headache would go away so she could offer a decent plan to cover her very impulsive kidnapping. She also wished Leo would prove less shocked and happier to see her, especially considering how he kept saying she was a ghost. If she'd been dead in his world, wasn't he happy to see her?

Azura's hand on her shoulder was her biggest comfort and she found herself holding her wrist instinctively, gathering strength from her presence.

"Leo, I don't want to treat you as a prisoner. I've fought you once and I can't bring myself to do it again."

Her brother winced, swallowing as he struggled to get himself together.

"You picked the Hoshidans in your world too, didn't you? And now this is your version of Hoshido," he went on, gesturing to Lyn and Raven.

Corrin couldn't hold his gaze, while Azura glared at him. It was hard for her to look at Leo and not see the man who had hurt her back in her own world. She could understand that every single person summoned to Askr and the neighboring lands were confused and lost and hurting. But Leo had raised his hand to her, had never shown her that he cared for Corrin after her so-called "betrayal" to side with Hoshido.

"It's not a lot of people who get a second chance at having a family member back in their lives. Corrin is alive now, here and she decided she'd rather kidnap you than have to fight you. What does it matter which side she was summoned in?"

Leo shuffled to his feet, his anger flashing briefly as Raven raised his axe at him menacingly.

"Still easier to follow a side than to go off on your own, isn't it? No need to glare like that, I'll follow you without resistance. But that's only because I know it would be futile."

Raven dropped a hand on his armor-clad shoulder, forcing him to lower himself a notch with his sheer strength.

"Stop being a prick and tell us how many people were in that tower with you."

"My escort died on the way here thanks to all the bandits," Leo admitted, shrugging him off.

Corrin saw how his eyes went to the book she'd collected for him and she felt a twinge of guilt. Leo knew her, but he had no idea if he could trust any of her companions and she could understand the level of helplessness he had to be in.

"We've stumbled upon quite the dangerous place, haven't we?" she asked him, daring to meet his red eyes again.

He looked at her and Azura, his fists clenching at his sides.

"A world of second chances. And the threat of re-living losses." he observed, turning on his heels to face away from Corrin.

Lyn saw how affected the princess was and declared they should move out since they had a potential source of intel to present Alfonse. The trip back would most certainly be miserable, Leo whining as Raven insisted on tying him up before throwing him across a horse, Azura and Corrin sharing a mount. Lyn led the way, the princesses riding close, Leo coming after, with Raven watching him closely to make sure he didn't try anything. A few hours later, as they helped her brother off the horse, Corrin undid the rope on his wrists, fighting against guilt and all the months she'd spent worrying about him after winning over Norh. Leo seemed ready to make a new complaint about his treatment as a prisoner, but was cut short by Corrin hugging him tightly. Not a dragon this time, but his human sister, alive and warm under the mud and dampness sitting in the air.

He could have tried grabbing at her sword, but said sword was still on her horse, too many feet away... and the very knowledge Corrin was truly alive was finally hitting him. He hugged her back, his gestures made awkward by both soreness and the fear she could slip away from him.

He'd seen Xander killing her with his own hands. Heard this world's Xander lamenting about his crimes. And since so many variants of every world existed, there had to be one where Corrin had killed him, and also one where he'd killed her. He couldn't help his shiver and Corrin shivered too, going through similar thoughts.

"I missed you, brother."

Leo fought against the ache in his throat, wishing to pull away with his dignity intact. His legs were weak, his arms sore and the ache in his throat seemed to grow, catching up to his head and heart as pictures and bloody scents threatened to invade his senses.

"You think we didn't?"

"I'm… I'm sorry? If you stay around, we don't have to miss each other anymore," she offered.

"That's anything but fair. But I get it."

Second chances were not to be pushed away. With a deep sigh, he let out a muffled apology, Corrin smiling at him.

"You won't run away then?"

"I will not risk facing your dragon form dragging me off into the night. I've had enough with being a chew toy once."

Saying that, he tried checking his armor for any mark of wear, wrinkling his nose at a few spots.

"I'll take what I can," Corrin whispered. "Come, brother, you must be hungry."

Raven was not happy with how casually they were handling their "prisoner" but when Lyn reminded him they were family, he got quieter. Azura silently thanked whoever was responsible for that reprieve

Lyndis tried to make small talk and both princesses did join in the discussion, Raven grunting and hmphing while Leo barely voiced a word, eating reluctantly and already mentally preparing himself to be forced to sleep tied up if it was going to reassure his bunkmate.

"We should be far enough from any of his fellow soldiers to set up camp for the night, but how shall we bunk up?" Lyndis asked.

"We should take turns to keep watch and someone needs to watch over this bundle of sunshine," Raven observed.

"Why am I not surprised?" Leo sneered.

"You're bunking up with the snappy prince, we girls can take turns keeping watch. I'll take the first turn, alright with you, Corrin, Azura?"

The pair nodded, Corrin giving an apologetic smile to her brother as he was pushed inside his tent by Raven.

"I certainly hope things will calm down once we're back in camp," Azura whispered.

"Yeah. This was a pretty crazy day. You must be tired?" Corrin asked her.

The dancer gave a short nod, thinking back on the brief heart-to-heart they'd shared. Neither of them had had any time to consider what their confession meant, especially since they while did love each other, it had been their self-counterparts from another world. Azura wondered how she was even supposed to get her mind around that. She focused on picking up the few dishes they'd used for dinner, Corrin busying herself by making sure Lyn was really fine with taking the first watch.

"I offered, didn't I? You looked pretty tired after changing into a dragon and I can tell Azura is stressed out. Get her to rest up already." Lyn told her with an easy-going smile.

There was no more distraction possible at this point, the dragon nearly hearing those words again in the back of her mind "I loved you..." That past tense had been so painful, and yet she wanted to hear it again. It had felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Could they pretend the fact they were the actual people they used to know was enough?

"Azura," Corrin started, finding her voice a bit rougher than she'd expected and clearing her throat, feeling awkward and sheepish. "Azura," she tried again, her eyes somehow holding Azura's gentle gaze. "You said earlier we had much to talk about…"

And they finally had some time.

"Let's settle in our tent, shall we?" the dancer offered.

Butterflies fluttered around her stomach as they fell into steps and their hands brushed. Had they gotten this close already? Were they following some invisible pull towards each other? The horse ride had been… strange. They were both too focused on how Leo's kidnapping would turn out to really focus on each other. Now, it seemed like there was nothing else either of them could do. As they seemed ready to enter the tent at the same time, they both froze, right before bumping their shoulders together.

"After you," Corrin offered, smiling as she gave a little flourish.

Azura smiled back to her, wondering why her cheeks were warming up despite the night air. She shook her head softly.

"No, no, after you, Corrin."

"Let me insist, Azura."

"Corrin, please, this is ridiculous," the dancer laughed, bringing an hand to her mouth as though showing that particular emotion was bad.

In the short time she'd been in Askr, Azura had felt more joy than in all the months spent in Norh back in her world. It was a very strange feeling for her, to even grow accustomed to smiling so much. To genuinely smile. Her heart swelled with the need to tell Corrin and as embarrassment came with the feeling, she lowered her head, hurrying into the tent.

Corrin couldn't quite describe what was in her head or her heart as she followed her inside. Seeing the flush on Azura's cheeks was something new, something her Azura had mostly kept to herself. She was always so composed. She was getting to see more than just Azura alive. And it felt like a chance she needed to hold on to, otherwise, she would lose her mind with how complicated things were in this world where anyone, anyone at all, could be summoned out of the blue.

Following Azura inside, she found her hastily finishing the setting up of their bedrolls.

"Is everything okay with you?" Corrin asked, dumbfounded.

"I'm fine. Well, maybe not fine, but… I think our talk from earlier is… starting to sink in."

"Is now a bad time to talk about it?"

Azura quickly shook her head.

"No, there might not be one good time, but it's not a bad time. I don't think I can have a bad time when I'm around you." Azura reached and smoothed out wrinkles in the thin blanket atop one of the bedrolls.

Corrin was suddenly reminded of the impression she had when she had to stand in front of their troops, back in Hoshido, with hundreds of soldiers lined up. She wanted to hide so badly and yet all she could do was smile.

"Gods, I'm so glad Azura, I could hug you! Can I hug you? Is it weird? I'm making this weird."

"Corrin, please, don't fret, sit with me. We can hug. But if you do now, I don't know if I can contain myself."

The white-haired princess sat down in the spot Azura had patted, a frown on her face.

"Why?"

"I'm still wrapping my head around the fact you're real. That we're… both alive in the same plane of existence."

Without thinking, the blue-haired princess had reached out, her hands finding Corrin's and their palms pressed against each other's, the pair looking at their fingers closing over the offered hand as though this had never happened.

"I loved you." Corrin said, finding it important to repeat those words, especially since Azura had said them first. "More than a friend, more than I thought I… I know I'm not the Corrin you knew, but it feels like you were… like you are…"

At a loss for words, she simply lifted Azura's hands to her face, kissing the back of her left hand, and the palm of her right hand. The dancer tensed but didn't pull away, fighting against contradictory feelings. This was the Corrin she knew. Her hair was different, but the way she stood, the way she smiled.

"I loved you this way too, I just never thought… And then it was too late, so this might be what we're doing now…"

Corrin squeezed her hands, her mouth dry as she shook her head with incertitude.

"What are we doing? We're just talki…"

Lips on her lips cut her off, Corrin freezing as the sheer notion of what was happening flooded her mind. She felt Azura hesitating and understood she needed to be comforted, to be reassured after finally acting out. She guided Azura's hands on either side of her, unsure where would be a proper location and if anywhere could scare her off. Her mouth was even more unsure, even more hesitant, but a fire had been lit and she wanted its warmth to reach everywhere, from the tip of her lips to the end of her hair.

Both women rose on their knees, Azura's hands staying on Corrin's waist, finding the small of her back, the Hoshidan princess cupping her delicate face, gently pushing back the long strands of blue hair. Their kisses were soft, gentle brushes, tender in their wish to not rush each other, a little pressing with the barely contained panic at the idea they could lose sight of each other again.

"I love you," Corrin said again, the present tense giving her wings that were almost instantly snapped off by Azura's soft "no" but also another kiss, Azura's mouth surer this time, guiding Corrin into a new dance.

"A…"

Another kiss.

"Azu…"

Their chests brushed, Corrin hoping Azura could hear the painful rhythm at which her heart was beating. Why had she told her no? Why was that her answer to her feelings? Why was she kissing her so desperately and reverently if she didn't believe her?

"Azura!" Corrin managed, afraid of raising her voice but standing her ground, her hands finding the bare shoulders of the dancer and pushing her back just enough for their eyes to meet, both of them panting.

"I'm sorry. I want to be your Azura, you have no idea how badly I want it, but…"

"But what? I love Azura and you're Azura, don't make my head hurt, my heart is already…"

"I don't know what to think, Corrin, I don't… I loved her and you're her, but isn't this… Is this what you really need?"

"Do I need to apologize for being alive? I was..." Corrin took her hands back, holding them in front of her chest, fighting against the tears gathering in her eyes. It felt like a storm under her skin, her heart beating so hard, so strongly, she was afraid it would expand too far and stop. "I was always afraid this was wrong. No one told me I could..."

Azura's eyes widened, realizing what Corrin was implying, what she was doing to her.

"No, no, Corrin…"

"I'm made wrong, right? There must be something she had I don't…"

"No, Corrin, I beg you, don't think this is your fault. I'm scared but not of this. Not of us. I'm scared of running after a ghost. Of putting a weight on your shoulders that you shouldn't carry. I used to think seeing you happy was all I needed, I didn't mind watching from afar."

"What about what you want? Why do you have to be so fucking selfless? That's why I lost you in the first place. It feels like you barely value yourself, but you mean the world to me."

And those words should not have been aimed at this Azura, this Azura had made different decisions, had been carried through different paths and right as she said those things, Corrin understood what weight her sweet, sweet songstress had been talking about.

"I'm sorry, this... "

"No, I should hear those things. I took the first step and half pulled back almost immediately, it's unfair to both of us. I felt dead in this world without you. And I was also mad at you, mad at her, because you had to be a hero, you had to take every risk and in the end..."

Now they were both crying, both shaking and Corrin couldn't trust her voice to align words, she couldn't… Apologies and regrets and hurt and a sense of betrayal were spiralling across her mind, across her battered soul, as Azura tried to muster an apology, tried to separate the "you's" and the "her's" to no avail.

Sobs were coming now, it had to be the next step and Corrin almost wanted to turn into a dragon, so she could wrap herself around Azura and be strong instead of this weak, trembling thing she was.

"Azura…"

Instinct took over, Corrin's arms pulling Azura closer, the dancer trying to be quieter, trying to silence herself, knowing the others had to be hearing some of this, even if it was the lowest sound they could manage. The pain had festered for weeks, for months, and the brief reprieve, the knowledge the loss could be erased… Wasn't it simply an illusion both of them had been telling themselves? Their Corrin had still died, just as much as their Azura was gone. They could play pretend, they could learn to love each other, but wasn't it someone else they were chasing after?

Azura hid her face against Corrin's hair, finding the crook of her neck, her arms hugging her close, one hand stroking her pale locks carefully. Corrin let her own sobs come out, hoping crying now would make this weight lighter.

"I can't… lose you a second time. I can't…"

"Me neither, Corrin. I'm sorry, I didn't want to make you cry, I don't want to see you hurting."

"But this me right now is not who you needed to meet."

"Don't say that. It's you I just kissed. I just fear… the idea of using you to run away, and you should be loved properly and… fully, for who you are, not for the fact you're… This is so complicated."

"Does it have to be, though? Even to begin with, things were complicated between us. You grew up with my birth family, while I grew up with people who'd hurt you… And yet even if we were seeing slightly different versions of ourselves, we both fell in love with each other."

That had to mean something. Azura squeezed her tight, wishing her voice could be strong and steady and find the words, the lyrics to a comforting song, any song. She had always been terrified of hope, since there was so much she needed to hide, down to the name of her home.

"I don't know. I just…" Her voice broke, Corrin holding her as though she could shelter her with her arms.

"It's okay, Azura. For now, you should let it out. Knowing you, you've held back as much as you could, didn't you?"

And the fact it was true had to mean something, didn't it?

Allowing herself to cry out the pain she'd collected over all this time, she folded into Corrin, her sobs too strong, her panting sounding pathetic in her own ears, until she reached a point where she couldn't even focus on the sounds she was making, desperately holding onto Corrin. Minutes passed, the crying slowly turning into sniffling, Corrin shushing any apologies Azura started.

"I'm not angry at you. I can't resent you either. This is going to be hard and I'm not saying it will get easier with a week, or a month. But if we wanted to be together and we have a chance, I don't think that other Corrin, your Corrin, would be angry about it."

There were dark words beneath the ones the dragon princess dared to use, dark words like "you never even knew if it was going both ways, at least I can give you that". She felt ashamed of thinking such a thing, but surely getting to meet here, while both having the feelings they had…

"I want to love you, Azura. But if it hurts too much…"

"Stop, just stop. I never said you couldn't… We need to figure this out together. That's why I wanted us to talk."

"But do what you need right now is to talk?"

Azura chuckled weakly as she heard something in Corrin's voice that was almost playful.

"You can't be flirting with me now, I look… I must look awful."

"Like I'm prim and princessy right now," Corrin couldn't help teasing her.

"Red cheeks suits you. But not those puffy eyes, my dear."

They helped each other to dry their tears, Azura wondering if any song could express the feeling of touching the ghost of someone she loved knowing the person was alive. And knowing they were both the same and not.

"Azura, you look so deep in thought."

"I'm sorry, I... "

"Maybe we should just go to bed," Corrin declared, her voice a tad lower. Azura met her eyes and flinched at how quickly Corrin looked away from her.

"Corrin wait, I'm not… I'm not rejecting you, I'm just so confused by all of this. You can talk to me. And you can also touch me. In fact, I believe it might what I truly need right now. I just don't want to make any of us more confused than we already…"

The white haired princess seemed to regain her confidence with just that permission, her arms wrapping around Azura gingerly.

"What do you need? I don't want to sound too eager, but I… I really need to hold you," she admitted, blushing an adorable shade of red.

"Lay down with me?" Azura suggested, worrying her lower lip as she remembered the kisses they'd shared.

She planted a peck on the dragon's mouth, sighing as Corrin answered with even more enthusiasm, their kisses learning a pace they were both comfortable with, to dance and caress with every touch, Azura feeling a song growing in her heart. She felt so light all of a sudden, her hands cupping Corrin's face, brushing her hair aside to give her better access.

"You're so cute," the singer whispered.

"Don't be silly now."

"I mean it."

Corrin blushed even more, looking away.

"I think I'm not ready to hear you meaning it," the princess confessed.

She wasn't sure she understood herself as she picked those words, but they fit with the mix of heaviness and bubbliness in her heart.

"I do find you lovely, Corrin. I don't think it would be the case for just any version of you."

Corrin shook her head at her, her hands reaching for Azura's wrists, holding her hands in place. It felt so good to be held like this. Yet she had no idea how to place herself, how her body was supposed to move or to not move. She knew what she wasn't supposed to do around a man to avoid anything that looked or sounded or resembled improper behavior. That was what princesses were told at an early age in Nohr. But this was different, this was new and the fact it was even permitted...

"Less talking?" she suggested.

"I'm sorry if I'm making you nervous."

"No. I was already nervous. Not nervous nervous, just…"

"Corrin, it's okay."

They gazed at each other in silence for a few seconds, Corrin looking away first and hiding her face against Azura's chest, grateful to feel her arms wrapping around her, a silent assent all she needed to quench her doubt about moving this close to her.

"Are you okay?" Azura asked.

"I don't know."

I should be. I should be and I want to be and I can't remember when I ever was this confused in my life.

"If it's any consolation, I don't know how I feel either," Azura told her.

Corrin gasped, wondering if she'd somehow caught her thoughts, but that was preposterous.

"Is this good, though?"

"You mean you in my arms? It's more than good, Corrin."

The princess relaxed in the gentle embrace, slowly gathering the nerves to try holding Azura back. Her gestures felt awkward and everything in her mind told her she shouldn't be too bold, shouldn't assume she could just try whatever she wanted. But her heart wanted the closeness. Most of all, she wanted more.

To be continued…

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