Henry didn't go to Catherine's bed that night, not that she cared much, she was too upset to actually notice what was going on around her. True to her word Lady de Salinas had made sure no one disturbed her Queen, taking food and drinks up to the chambers herself. Catherine had spent all day pacing and resting in her bed, baby Mary with her at all times much to the governess protests, but she didn't care, she needed her around to make sure that she would not disappear out of thin air. She had been behaving like a ghost, pacing the room over and over again, but if she had left her chambers, she wouldn't have been able to face the world. She would have had to face all the ladies Henry had slept with and the mocking smiles from that Lady Anne.

Many times, along the night she had woken up from her slumber due to the many nightmares that plagued her mind. She would dream of her family and how they all disappeared one by one without her being able to do a thing. Sometimes she dreamed about her children, the living and the dead and she could have sworn that she had heard Henry's screams in her mind as they all lay dead on the floor. She was now sitting on her bed; another nightmare having woken her. Scanning the room, she found herself alone with her baby daughter. She had expected lady de Salinas to be there, but she was all by herself as she looked at the small fire that still lingered in the fireplace.

-Tu padre también tuvo amantes, Catalina. (Your father also had mistresses, Catalina) – the voice came from the left side of her bed, frightening Catherine, but as she turned, she saw her mother. It was a trick of the light, of her mind, but she so desperately wanted it to be real.

-¿Mamá? – her voice hoarse from not having uttered a word all day, quiet as to not wake baby Mary.

-Debes recordar que tú eres tu propia persona primero. Nunca os crie para que os dejarais avasallar por vuestros maridos. (You must remember that you are your own person first. I didn't bring you up, so you'll be dominated by your husbands)

-He perdido fuerza mamá, no soy como tú. He perdido a todos mis hijos menos a María y mis hermanas han creado grandes familias. Soy débil mamá. (I've lost my strength mama, I'm not like you. I've lost all my children except for María and my sisters have created big families. I'm weak mama)

-No mi amor, no eres débil. (No my love, you are not weak) – Isabel's hand cherished her daughter's cheek, a cold breeze brushing her face where her mother's hand would be. – Has estado sola tanto tiempo que has olvidado quién eres. (You've been alone for so long that you've forgotten who you are)

-No soy nadie. No tengo cualidades que Henry podría querer como hacía al principio. He fallado en mi misión. (I'm no one. I don't have any qualities that Henry could love like he used to at the beginning. I've failed in my mission)

-Eres fuerte. (You are strong) – Catherine turned her head to the other side and saw the ghostly figures of her sisters Isabel, Juana, and Maria. Isabel had died so young in childbirth and still, she told that Catherine was strong. Coming from her dearly departed sister it meant the world to her.

-Eres inteligente. (You are smart) – Juana's words sounded so different from how she had used to talk after she had married Felipe. She sounded happy, truly happy. Maybe the afterlife wasn't such a bad place after all.

-Eres justa. (You are fair) – it was such an irony to see her beloved sister María standing right in front of her when that same morning she had read her letter thinking she was fine with a newborn son.

-Eres Catalina, y debes recordar que eres mi hija, nuestra hija. (You are Catalina, and you must remember that you are my daughter, our daughter.)

-Papá. – his ghost came out of the blue and joined her mother at the side of the bed. He held a very proud grin as he looked at his youngest daughter.

-Te han encerrado sin oportunidad de tener contacto con nosotros, te han intentado apagar como si fueras un incendio que amenaza a todo su modo de vida. Han intentado que tu esencia desapareciera. (They've locked you without giving you the opportunity of keeping in touch with us, they've tried to put you out as if you were a fire that threatens their way of life. They've tried to make your essence disappear.)

-Pero no debes dejar que te venzan mi hija. Eres nuestra heredera, y debes volver a ser quien eras. (But you mustn't let they defeat you. You are our heir and must go back to who you were)

-Os echo de menos. El embajador no me dijo nada, y no pude ni deciros adiós… Os he fallado, siento como si os hubiera dado la espalda. (I miss you. The ambassador didn't tell me anything and I wasn't able to say goodbye… I've failed you; I feel as if I've turned my back on you)

-Tu momento llegará, pero no ahora. Tienes muchos años por delante todavía, y la mejor manera en la que podrías recordarnos es asegurándote de que nuestro mundo, nuestras tierras, la corona y nuestra gente se mantienen seguros y proliferan. (Your moment will come, but not now. You have many years ahead of you, and the best way you can remember us is by making sure that our world, our lands, the crown and our people remain safe and proliferate)

-Catalina, sabemos que es un gran peso para llevar en los hombros, (Catalina, we know that it's a huge weight to have upon your shoulders,) – her sisters approached her, their figures shinning in the firelight. – pero has aprendido de todos nosotros, y aunque la única que fue reina fue Juana sabemos que lo harás bien. Lo llevas en la sangre. (but you've learnt from us and even though the only one that was Queen was Juana we know that you'll do great. It runs in your blood.)

- ¿Os quedareis conmigo? No puedo perderos, no quiero perderos. (Will you stay with me? I can't lose you; I don't want to lose you.)– a new batch of tears were now falling freely from her eyes. Her heart ached horribly as she looked at her family. She wanted to spend the rest of her life here, in this moment, but she could see that they were starting to fade. – No, no os vayáis. (No, don't go)

-Catalina, siempre estamos contigo, aquí. (Catalina, we'll always be with you, here.) – her father pointed at her chest, Catherine's heart aching to touch him. – Estamos muy orgullosos, y queremos que seas feliz, pero para ello debes de recordar quien eres, lucha por tu vida, por tu reino. (We are very proud of you, and we want you to be happy, but to achieve it you must remember who you are, fight for your life, for your kingdom.)

-Mis hijos… (My children…)

-Están con nosotros. No te preocupes, pronto tendrás el hijo que tanto quieres. (They are with us. Do not worry,soon you'll have the son that you so much desire.)

-No puedo soportarlo. Os tengo aquí delante y sé que no estáis al mismo tiempo. No quiero que me dejéis, no quiero que os marchéis, por favor. (I can't stand it. I've got you right in front of me and I know that you are not here at the same time. I don't want you to leave me, I don't want you to go, please.) – she was crying very hard now, kneeling on her bed moving her arms from one direction to another as she looked at the ghosts of her family. – Me duele tanto el corazón el veros aquí. No pude deciros adiós, ni rezar por vuestras almas… No estuve en vuestros funerales. Me siento tan sola y vacía. (Seeing you here makes my heart ache. I wasn't able to say goodbye nor pray for your immortal souls… I didn't go to your funerals. I feel so alone and empty.)

-Nosotros también te añoramos y querríamos quedarnos aquí para siempre, pero ya no tenemos asuntos pendientes. Tú eras quien nos ataba y ahora que los deseos de Dios se han cumplido debemos irnos. (We miss you as well and we would love to stay here forever, but we don't have unfinished business anymore. You were what was keeping us here and now that God's plans have been fulfilled, we must go)– Tears shone in Isabel's eyes, even in her ghostly form she cared so deeply for her daughter, for all her children. – Te queremos, ahora y siempre, mi hija. Mi Catalina. (We love you, now and forever, my daughter. My Catalina.)

They faded in front of her own eyes before she could beg them once more to stay, leaving her kneeling on her bed, crying her heart out. Seeing them, even if it had been a trick of her mind reassured her, comforted her in a small way, her sobs quiet as she laid face down in her bed, burying her face among the blankets. She would have gladly given up the crown, her titles, everything just to be able to live with them for just one day, but that's not what they wanted. She would be a Queen until the end of her days, that's what she had been taught and that's what she would do. Lady de Salinas entered the room and found her sobbing in her bed. She ran to her Majesty, petting her head as to make her presence known. Catherine raised her head, her face red and puffed as she looked at her lady.

-Another nightmare my lady?

-They were here, standing next to the bed. – she grabbed her arms more tears falling from her eyes.

-Who?

-My family. My parents and sisters.

-But your Majesty…

-They told me so many things… They let me say goodbye.

-Your Majesty, I… - a glimpse of happiness crossed Catherine's eyes and it was then when Lady de Salinas knew that she had seen her family, and they had given her hope and strength. – I'm sure they came to you, my lady.

-They are proud of me.

-Everyone is your Majesty.

-They said that I had forgotten who I was, have I, Maria? – her sad eyes starred at her intensely as if she held all the truths in the world.

-May I speak frankly?

-Of course, Maria.

-I don't think you've forgotten but I do think that his Majesty has dominated your spirits. You used to be a strong, temperamental, and opinionated woman. You were taught to handle foreign affairs and matters that involved the crown, but your husband ended up cowering you

-Henry loves me.

-But he's hurt you so many times. I know, I've seen your bruises and scratches. You've let him treat you like a possession and not a person.

-What have I done Maria? – Catherine felt small and weak as she came to the realization that she had stopped being Catalina long ago to become what she had hated her entire life. A servant to her husband.

-You've behaved like a wife, submissive to your husband and not like a Queen, it's not your fault, you've suffered so much over the years.

-He was so sweet when we married, and after our children died… He hates me because it's my fault.

-No, your Majesty. It's not your fault, he has hurt you and upset you many times and caused you to lose your children. It was never your fault.

-What am I to do Maria? He won't accept Mary as his heir.

-Put yourself together Catherine! You are the Queen and you need to stand up for your people and your daughter.

-I can't… - her head hanging low, hiding her face from María's gaze for she couldn't stand her eyes on her. She was just too upset about everything and felt as if she were a huge disappointment.

-Yes, you can. Who are you?

-What?

-Look at me and tell me, who are you?

-I'm… I'm Catalina. – she raised her head, sitting with her legs crossed over the mattress, a few silent tears still falling down her cheeks.

-No. Who are you?

-Maria, I don't understand what you mean. I'm Catalina.

-No. I know you are in pain, but you are not who you say. I'll ask you again, who are you?

-I'm Catalina of Aragon.

-And what else? – Catherine had stopped crying by then, a few hiccups still escaping her throat as she talked with Maria.

-I'm Catalina of Aragon, Queen of England.

-Say it with confidence. Who are you?

-Catalina de Aragón, Queen of England! – she raised her voice enough to boost her confidence but not to wake her sleeping baby.

-You'll be alright now. Tomorrow morning you shall be your old self again.

-Do you believe so?

-You'll have to be strong and stand up to his Majesty but remember that now you hold the future of most of the continent. You are more powerful than he is, don't be scared to remind him where he stands.

-You are right. I'm Queen and I can't let him push me around as if I were nothing.

-Go to sleep now your Majesty, you need to rest.

-What if I get scared? Henry's very strong.

-You'll have to face your fears, your Majesty. He'll try to scare you, I'm sure of it, but you are his Queen, and will be until you die, so face him. If he tries to hurt you, threaten him, he can't kill you without starting a war, so you'll be safe.

-How is it that you know so much about politics Maria?

-I listened carefully whenever your parents were teaching you anything or took you to Court or when you were with your tutors. I did it so I could help you in the future. I know that it's very difficult to trust people when you hold a position of power, but I'm loyal to you until death takes me.

-What would I do without you María? – she laid back in bed, María cherishing her hair sweetly as she drifted back to sleep, her face relaxing as happy dreams filled her mind for the first time that night.

Lady de Salinas checked on Mary after tucking Catherine in for the rest of the night and after seeing that the little girl was still sleeping peacefully, she went back to her armchair that was at the foot of the bed, close to the dimming fire. After a few minutes of praying silently for her friend and Queen, she drifted off to sleep as well. Catherine hardly got any sleep that night, but after the conversation she had had with her family, she found that sleep didn't elude her anymore as if someone was protecting her from those bad dreams that had plagued her mind for so long. She hadn't slept so well in years. As the sun reached her bed a knock on the door woke Lady de Salinas but not the Queen, thankfully. Standing up she rushed to the door and saw Catherine's ladies standing there, waiting.

-She's still asleep. What time is it?

-It's past seven. Since she didn't call for us at the usual time, we decided to come on our own accord to see if she was fine.

-She's fine, just asleep. She's had a terrible night. Wait here.

Closing the door, she saw Catherine stirring in bed, opening her eyes at the light of day. She worried that maybe the knock or the conversation had woken her, but the baby's gurgles reached her ears as Catherine got out of bed to pick her daughter up. She looked better than yesterday, still very sad and melancholic, but as soon as she sat in her bed with her beautiful daughter a sweet smile graced her lips.

-The ladies are waiting outside your Majesty.

-Tell them to come in, and Maria, thank you.

-What for your Majesty?

-You helped me so much yesterday and I hardly think I'll ever be able to repay you. You also spent the night here with me sacrificing your own rest for mine. You should go to bed and rest for the day.

-Will you be alright on your own today your Majesty?

-Yes, do not worry about me. Your words are still very present in my mind and you need to rest. On your way to your rooms please tell Mary's governess to come.

-Of course, your Majesty. Would you like me to go right away or after you are dressed?

-Right away, you look very tired.

-I shall go then your Majesty.

Vowing softly, she headed for the door, motioning for the ladies to go inside. They stood patiently next to the fireplace as Catherine feed her daughter. She had often wondered how her sisters had looked when they were babies, did Mary resemble any of them? She took after her Spanish side of the family, her hair dark and her skin fair and soft to the touch. Did her daughter look like her when she was born? Mary slowly drifted back to sleep; her mouth still attached to Catherine's breast. Moving her over to her shoulder she covered her chest with her chemise as she motioned for her ladies to get moving with her free hand.

-Would her Majesty like to wear the blue gown today? – one of the girls showed her a beautiful deep blue dress with golden embroidery.

-No. I'll wear the black one.

-But that's a mourning dress your Majesty.

-I know. My sisters are gone and my father as well, I do believe it's about time I mourned their deaths. I shall wear that one.

-Of course, your Majesty.

A knock on the door informed her that someone was about to come in, the governess to be exact. She handed Mary to her, a bit reluctantly, but knew it would be best if her little girl waited in the nursery until she had finished getting dressed and had had breakfast with Henry. Getting out of bed she put a new clean chemise and waited for her ladies to put the corset and the petticoat on. She wanted to stay in her chambers again, a feeling of emptiness and solitude filling her entire being, but she had to go out for her own good. She stepped inside her beautiful black dress with white embroidery, the sleeves hugging her slender arms as her ladies tied the corset around her figure. Sitting down in front of her vanity one of the girls picked her brush up.

-I do not wish for any elaborate hairdos today. Brush it and pin it so it won't get on my face but leave it down.

Vowing her head, the girl brushed her raven locks softly as not to hurt her lady, carefully braiding a few of them and pinning them creating some sort of tiara around her head, her hair shinning in the sun as it came through the window. Her ladies showed her different types of jewels she could wear today but Catherine didn't feel like wearing rubies or sapphires, so she chose a series of pearls to decorate her hair and to wear around her neck and ears. Once she was ready, she dismissed everyone, staying all alone in her chambers. Maria's letter was still hidden in her jewellery box, well away from Henry's prying eyes, her hands shaking slightly as she looked at the folded parchment. She felt the urge to read it again but knew that it was best to leave things as they were, she was already in too much pain. Taking a deep breath she closed the box leaving her private chambers and was kind of surprised when she found herself alone at the breakfast table.

-Where's the king?

-He's having breakfast in his own chambers.

With her, obviously, Catherine thought bitterly to herself as she left the room. She had been with him when his parents died, when they lost their beloved sons, but now that he was supposed to be with her be had abandoned her once again. Her shoes clicked fast as she walked to Henry's room. She didn't even bother to knock just like he would have done. He was feeding her grapes, how disgusting. At the sound of the door opening they both jumped, Henry standing up startled.

-Catherine! What on Earth are you doing?!

-Leave – she looked sternly at Anne, the girl walking slowly towards the door.

-No, stay.

-I… said… leave. – Catherine didn't raise her voice; she didn't need to. Her mother used to use a very serious tone when they misbehaved or did something that was forbidden, but with Anne, it had to be different. She used an authoritative tone that even took Henry by surprise. Vowing quickly Anne left the two monarchs on their own. - I didn't expect you to come to my bed last night, but I had hoped you would have breakfast with me. I was obviously hoping for nothing since you were here, with her.

-Our marriage has been over since the very beginning Catherine. I will take as many mistresses as I like, and you won't say a word.

-Go ahead, do it, but don't complain if I let other men shower me in affections. You don't seem to want me, so...

-No. You are my wife and it's completely forbidden for you to have any male friends or companions. I forbid it!

-You just said that our marriage is over as if it never happened, why would it bother you? But that is not why I came here. – she was scared, terrified but stood her ground as he talked to her. - I want Wolsey to prepare a homily for the souls of my sisters and my father that have recently passed away, at Westminster.

-I don't think we should do that. The English people don't care about them, they weren't English. They will hate you.

-No, Henry, you don't care about them, it's not the same.

-You won't talk to me that way. – approaching her he was surprised to see that she hadn't moved an inch. He was taller but she held an aura of power that he had never seen before. – You burst in here, throw her out and talk absolute nonsense about a homily. You will stay here and stop this. You are my wife and shall behave as such.

-I didn't come here to ask for your permission. I will talk to Wolsey today so it can be done tomorrow or as soon as possible.

-You are disobeying me?! – he grabbed her wrists, pushing her against the wall, her back hitting the stone wall, but she didn't lose her defiant look, her head held high.

-I am the Queen and shall do and go wherever I please. I am not disobeying you because I am not under your chains. I'm your wife, not an object. Let go of my hands, now. – he would have slapped her, she knew it, but he let go, walking backwards, stunned at his wife's behaviour. Had she become a cruel and vicious woman now that she didn't have any family left? – I would prefer if you accepted my actions instead of saying no to everything that you believe is stupid or has no place in your Court. I'm going to do it, with or without your approval because I don't need your permission. Remember that.

-Catherine? – his voice held a subtle tone of worry as he looked at her, his eyes wide as if he had just seen her for the first time in years. She was in mourning, her dress hugging her figure in a way he had never noticed. She was still beautiful, even more than Anne, her raven locks soft and shiny, her skin soft and sweetly pale but with a small hint of an olive sub tone inherited from her parents. She hadn't moved from her spot as he stared at her, his eyes roaming through her body until he met her eyes. He used to say that if he looked at her stunning blue eyes he would surely be bound to drown, but he wouldn't have minded. He was doing exactly that now, staring at her soul through her eyes.

-What? I do not wish to argue Henry, I'm tired of it.

-Why are you doing this?

-Doing what?

-Defy me in front of Anne, talk to me in this manner. I'm her king if you treat me like…

-Like what? The same way you've been treating me? I'm tired of you always getting what you want. You never ask, you just do it. I'm tired of fighting, of trying to save this marriage when the only thing you are doing is destroying it. I'm in pain, I've lost my family and you spend your time with her? Sometimes I think that you are too afraid of losing and that's why you run away, like a coward.

-I'm not a coward! Don't tell me I'm the problem!

-See? You've been playing this game where I always lose, but not anymore. I'm the Queen, and you will have to learn how to live without my devoted attention.

-Are you going to leave me? – a ray oh hope and guilty rose inside his chest, but at the same time, extreme saddens overtook him. He loved Anne, but he couldn't let go of Catherine?

-Of course not. I would never do that, but you won't be my priority from now on. If you want to take mistresses, you'll have to get used to me having my own male companions. I won't be your servant anymore. – adjusting her corset, she saw how Henry's eyes travelled all over her body, hungry for love or lust. Maybe he would come to her instead of Anne tonight. No, it was best not to get her hopes up. - You can call your whore back; I shall have breakfast in my chambers.

-You are here already, why don't we have breakfast together? – he touched her hand softly, but she pulled away. She was not for him, not until he realised that she was the one and only for him.

-Because I don't want to see your face right now. You shall be informed of when the homily will take place once I've talked with Wolsey.

With her head held high, she turned around and left his chambers. She kept walking even when Henry left his rooms, following her down the corridor, yelling for her to come back. She did notice that his voice held a hint of worry and need but she was not going to let him do whatever he pleased with her. She was exhausted from playing this stupid game with him, she was always the one that ended up getting hurt, but two can play that game, and it was about time she tossed the dice. She would not be a Queen and Empress that let her husband rape her and punish her, no one in the continent would trust her and she would have a hard time already because of her sex. Henry would learn that she was not to be taken for granted.