Trauma Part One: Ditching the Ball:
AN: TRIGGER WARNING! Discussions of anxiety and panic attacks, and flashbacks in this chapter. If you feel this might trigger an episode within yourself please feel free to skip.
Also this is the first of a couple (or maybe more than two) one-shots dealing with the emotional and mental fall-out following Nashi's journey so...buckle in.
Nashi sighed as she put the pearl necklace her mother had given on and smoothed down her celeste color gown. She stared at herself in the mirror, faking a smile. She looked nice...she guessed?
She sighed once more as she stepped out of her room in the suite and into the living area where the rest of her family was waiting.
"Aw, you look so pretty!" Lucy cheered as she walked towards her daughter, already dressed in her pink gown.
Nashi smiled weakly, but asked: "Do I have to go?"
Lucy frowned. "I thought you liked parties. And you've already gotten all dressed up. All your friends will be there."
"You alright, Firecracker?" Natsu asked from where he was fixing Kyri's
"Yeah, yeah, I'm just…" Nashi paused, trying to find a word to describe how she was feeling. What was a word she could be used to describe feeling...nothing and yet everything at the same time. She was overly aware of how dry her mouth and throat were, how stiff this dress was, how itchy the petticoats were, how pinchy the shoes were, how constricting the pearl necklace was. Yet, she had no emotion. No excitement, no happiness like she usually felt before a party. She felt...numb.
She couldn't come up with any words, though, so she simply said:
"Tired."
Lucy smiled softly. "Oh, I see. Well, we won't stay the whole time, we'll come back early."
Nashi weakly smiled once again. "Okay."
"Gotta quit eating those sugary snacks before bed," Natsu said as he finished fixing Kyri's hair, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, and stood up.
"You have room to talk," Lucy smirked, before noticing something, and running into the kitchen. "Igneel, we JUST got you into that suit and there will be food at the ball, you are not eating pudding right now."
"Aw, man," Igneel groaned, closing the refrigerator door.
Nashi smiled, knowing she should be laughing at the scene, but she didn't feel the usual tickled of laughter in her stomach. She felt...nothing.
"Nashi?"
Nashi turned to find Layla standing behind her.
"Can you help me zip up the back of my dress?"
"Sure," Nashi answered, bending down and grabbing the zipper of Layla's dress. Her strange mood had made her clumsy, though, and she caught her finger in the zipper.
Someone grabbed her. She couldn't see them, she was blinded by the smoke as she ran towards her grandmother's voice, but out of the darkness, out of nowhere, they grabbed her.
Nashi gasped, jumping back, and clutching her hand to her chest.
"Nashi? Are you okay?" Layla asked, turning around to face her sister.
Nashi looked down at her hand, a small pinprick of blood stained her thumb.
Splinters stabbed her hands as the rain ripped at her, threatening to tear her off the high rail as she raced to get the message to the station in time.
"Nashi?"
Nashi gasped, and shook her head quickly, trying to clear her head. "Yeah, I'm fine, I just got my thumb stuck in the zipper, that's all."
"Are you okay?" Layla asked again, a frightened look on her face.
Nashi feigned a smile and nodded. "Yeah, it's fine. Turn back around so I can fix it."
Layla frowned, but said nothing more as she did what she was told.
Nashi popped her thumb in her mouth to rid it of the blood spot before fixing up her sister's dress.
"Thanks," Layla said as she walked to help Lucy gather the twins.
Nashi just stood in place, staring at the ground.
What just happened?
Why was she randomly remembering things that happened to her in the void? Or on the night of the storm that killed that man in the train. The man she failed to save. Or…
Nashi looked back at her hands. Her thumb was bleeding again.
"Hang on, I cut my finger, I gotta get a bandage," she said over her shoulder as she made her way to the bathroom. She popped her thumb in her mouth again, grimacing at the bitter taste of blood-
Blood poured down from a busted lip as she flew through a cyclone, trying to get to Elena, trying to stop her from getting to Blue Pegasus and-
Nashi gasped, all but collapsing against the bathroom door.
"What…" Nashi stuttered, putting a hand to her head. Now why was she remembering the fights with Elena?
"C'mon, this is nuts," she complained to herself as she turned the sink on and splashed some water on her face. What was going on with her? True, she hadn't been feeling...well...much of anything since she got back from the void. Since she saved herself and the rest of Fairy Tail's adults. Since the games ended. Since Elena...died. And Carmen and the others disappeared.
Those sixe kids she couldn't save.
But what was all this crazy remembering stuff? Why now?
Was it because she was going to the ball now?
What her mother had said was true, Nashi usually liked parties. But this one was going to be different.
Everyone was going to be asking about what she did. About how the adults were sent into that void and how she went after them. She hadn't said anything about her time there.
And she wasn't sure she wanted to.
She wasn't sure she was ready to talk.
Especially since…
Nashi squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head.
"Uh-uh," she told herself. "Uh-uh."
She was not going to think about that other than her.
That other version of her that the ghost of Jose showed her.
Seeing it once was bad enough and she was NOT going to think about it. Not now. Not ever again.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Nashi?" Natsu called through the bathroom. "You okay?"
"I'm fine," Nashi answered. "Almost done."
"Alright, we'll be waiting in the hall for you," Natsu answered.
"Okay," Nashi looked at herself in the mirror once more. She dried her face off, flattened her hair, and smoothed her dress. Taking a deep breath, she put on the best false smile she could muster.
She looked fine. Maybe if she could just stay like this, staying looking like she was okay whatever this was that was bugging her would go away.
Nashi took another deep breath, opened the door, and walked to the hallway.
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
"Why do rich people always gotta give us these tiny, fancy little things?" Koree asked, holding up a well painted cake ball. "That's barely enough to even fill a kitten."
"Hey, hey, Cato," Persephone called, holding one up in her hand.
Cato leaned back in his chair slightly, mouth open. Persephone threw it at him and she caught it in his mouth.
"Hey!" the rest of the birthday gang cheered as they clapped. All but Nashi, who just stared at her plat, nudging at a leaf garnish with her fork, ignoring everything around her.
Until one of the cake balls hit her in the head.
"Hey!" she frowned.
"No good!" Koree cheered as the other kids laughed. Nashi frowned, grabbing the ball and chucking it at Koree.
"C'mon guys, that wasn't funny."
"It was a little funny," Persephone smirked.
"Hey, you okay?" Storm asked.
"I'm fine," Nashi muttered.
"I thought I was supposed to be moody today," Koree. "Unless...did you officially become a woman today too?"
"What?" Nashi asked, genuinely confused.
"She means did you get your period," Cato explained in a surprisingly even-toned voice.
"Cato!?" Roman questioned, shocked by his friend's bluntness.
"What? It's a thing? Why are you guys acting weird?" Cato shrugged.
"No," Nashi answered with a roll of her eyes. "I didn't."
"Then why are you so moody?" Koree asked.
"I'm not moody."
"Mm. Little bit," Roman said, demonstrating by almost pinching his fingers together.
"To be fair, you've been kinda moody since you got back," Persephone said. "Which is not cool, I'm supposed to be the mean one."
"I'm not moody, and I'm not mean," Nashi answered stiffly, poking harder at the garnish with her fork.
"Are you sure, because you sure are frowning a lot," Cato said.
"I said I'm fine, okay!?" Nashi snapped, catching all her friends off guard.
They all jumped, staring at her in shock.
"Okay, okay," Storm said, raising his hands. "Sheesh. We're just checking on you, that's all."
"Hm," was Nashi's only reply.
An awkward silence fell over the group, before Cato cleared his voice. "So, what are you guys going to do when we get back?"
"Eat my bodyweight in metal," Koree answered. "Without me and Dad there I'm sure the scrap metal yard's overflowing."
"Boo! Boring," Persephone whined.
"Wall, fine, what are you doing?" Koree asked.
"Working on a new spell," Persephone answered.
"Ooh! Do tell," Cato said.
"Nope. Can't. It's a surprise."
"You're not fun," Cato pouted.
"It's Persephone," Storm said. "What did you expect?"
"Watch it Wet-Boy!" Persephone snapped.
"Gee, Wet-Boy, never heard that before," Storm rolled his eyes, before stopping to think. "Huh, I actually never have heard that one before…"
"You're welcome," Persephone bowed her head. "See, I'm plenty fun."
"Not sure we have the same taste in fun…" Storm's eyes narrowed.
"You just figured that out?" Roman questioned, arching an eyebrow.
"Like you have room to talk, you Mama's Boy," Persephone sniffed.
"Just because I try to stay out of trouble doesn't mean I'm not fun," Roman countered.
"Well, kinda, I guess. Kidnapping you was fun," Koree chuckled.
"Yeah, I still gotta get you guys back for that," Roman frowned at his friends.
"You enjoyed it, admit it," Persephone said.
"We all saw you smiling," Storm grinned.
"No you didn't. I wasn't smiling, I was mortified," Roman answered a bit too quickly.
"You were too," Cato said. "Right before the games began and-"
CLANK!
Nashi's hand began trembling and she dropped her fork to her plate with a loud clatter. She ducked her head in embarrassment. "Sorry."
"You're fine," Storm said before the other five returned to their usual conversation, none of them noticing Nashi slipping her hands below the table and staring at them.
Why couldn't she get them to stop shaking?
All Cato had been doing was stating a fact. Roman was wearing a goofy grin on his face when the games began. Before...the adults just disappeared.
But they were back now. Everything was fine. So why was the thought of their disappearance making her shake so bad? Cato didn't even get to say it because she dropped her fork before he could. This was crazy! What was wrong with her?
"...Nashi?"
"Huh?" Nashi looked up to find her friends looking at her.
"What are you doing when you get back?" Cato asked.
"Oh, well, um...we're gonna start building the new house...finally…" Nashi answered.
"Ooh, sounds fun!" Koree cheered.
"I guess. I've never built a house before," Nashi shrugged.
"Just don't burn all the wood," Roman sniffed.
"I won't!" Nashi frowned at him.
"So long as the ropes don't look like snakes, right?" Persephone smirked.
"Will you guys ever let me live that down?" Nashi sighed.
"Nope!" Koree said. "We couldn't jump rope for a month after that, thanks to you!"
"First of all, it was a week, not a month," Nashi protested. "Second, they fell off the shelf on top of me, that would scare anyone. Third, I was five, guys! Gimme a break!"
The other five kids laughed at her. Nashi even cracked a smile. For the first time that night she was starting to feel like herself.
Clink! Clink! Clink! Clink!
Nashi and the other children turned to where Queen Hisui was clinking a spoon against her glass.
"So, after she's done giving her speech, can we go play?" Koree asked.
"Uh...I think so?" Cato shrugged.
The queen set her glass down. "Thank you, can we lower the lights, please?"
Everything went pitch black.
Nashi gasped, gripping the table cloth under her hands.
Darkness. No sound. No sign of up, or down. Just...nothingness. How was she going to find her parents in this? There was nothing here! And she was all alone.
"Nashi!"
SPLASH!
Nashi jumped at the cold sensation of water on her hands. There was a bit of light now, a spotlight on Queen Hisui. She sighed in relief.
"What are you doing?" Storm asked sharply.
"Huh?" Nashi wondered out loud, before remembering she felt something cold on her hands. She looked down to find two burn circles in the table cloth where she'd been gripping onto it, now soaked with Storm's water.
"Oops," she said, her cheeks flushing.
"Okay, those look nothing like snakes. What's your excuse this time?" Persephone snorted.
"I...uh...guess I got scared when the lights went out…" Nashi stuttered.
"Since when have you been scared of the dark?" Roman asked.
"Since now," Nashi answered quickly, grabbing her glass and downing the whole drink in one gulp, trying to loosen the tightness in her throat.
"You're a fire wizard, can't you just make your own light?" Koree asked.
"I think she tried," Cato said.
"Oh," Koree nodded.
"I've got it," Roman said as he requipped a glow stick into his hand, shook it up, and set it next to Nashi's plate. "There you go."
"Thanks," Nashi smiled, pulling the glow stick closer to her as she set her glass down. Despite drinking the whole thing down her throat still felt tight, making it hard for her to get a full breath.
"Since when do you carry glow sticks in your pocket dimension?" Persephone asked Roman.
"Hey, I don't ask what you've got stored in your archive, don't question what I've got in my pocket dimension," Roman said.
"Eh, that's fair," Persephone shrugged.
"Somehow I think your archive would be more frightening than what Roman's got…" Cato said as he narrowed his eyes.
"Excuse you," Roman said, offended. "What's scarier than throwing stars, crossbows, and katanas?"
"Persephone," Cato answered, pointing to the girl in question, who wore a proud smile on her face.
"Yeah, okay, I can't argue there," Roman shrugged, causing everyone to laugh.
Everyone but Nashi, who was tugging at the collar of her dress. She reached up, took off her pearl necklace and stuffed it into her pocket. It did feel a bit better without that on her neck. But the dress she was wearing was starting to feel tighter. And tighter.
Maybe she ate too much?
"...and now, I'd like to turn it over to someone else who is very thankful to the Fairy Tail guild for taking down Elena Anteria and the Orlando Brothers, our very own head of the Rune Knights, Captain Hezim."
Nashi gasped as she looked back up.
Hezim?
The neon-green man walked into the spotlight, taking the microphone and smiling at the crowd.
"Who let the killjoy in?" Persephone spat.
"At least he's not trying to arrest us this time," Storm muttered.
Nashi just stared at Hezim. This man had something against her.
She wasn't sure what it was exactly. But it was clear from the first time she'd met him three years ago that he was not fond of her.
The moment he'd walked into their hotel room to escort her family to a safer location all those years back Natsu had grabbed Nashi and did not let her go until they were out of Hezim's sight.
He never said why.
All Nashi could assume was that maybe he'd tried something before?
The Rune Knight ships that often flew over Fairy Tail were no doubt because of her. But she'd never been told how they started. Or when.
All of these unanswered questions that she hadn't thought too much about until now.
Until…
"Did they tell you that I and two others wanted to take you away when you were born?"
A shudder went down Nashi's spine as she jumped and looked about.
She could have sworn she heard Jose's voice…
...just like she did that day when…
Nashi shook her head, trying to clear the memories away. She was not going to think about that! Not anymore.
"...Nashi Dragneel…"
A spotlight suddenly fell on her. Nashi gasped and jumped once again and looked up. Everyone was looking at her. Everyone including Hezim.
Hezim had a strange, menacingly gleam in his eyes as he looked at her.
"...who bravely ventured into the unknown, saving her guild and thwarting these evil-doers dastardly plans. A venture I, as well as many others, would be very interested to learn more about."
A soft applause rose from the crowd as the spotlight faded.
"And to-" Hezim continued in his speech.
His voice faded from Nashi's mind. Every noise faded.
What did he mean by that? When he said "very interested?" The way he'd said "Very interested?"
Did he know it? What happened before she was born? Or was there something else about her that she didn't fully know or understand?
"I know what you really are, a monster."
"Uh-uh," Nashi said, shaking her head as Jose's voice penetrated her mind once again.
"Did you say something?" one of her friends asked, though she couldn't determine which one it was.
"No. Nothing," she answered curtly.
The lights of the ballroom came back on. Everyone clapped.
Nashi numbly followed suit, just trying to seem normal. Trying to look like she was fine.
"Okay, they're done, we can go play," Koree said as she stood up and skipped off.
"You guys go ahead I'm...uh…" Nashi looked about for an excuse, quickly noticing she still had about half a plate of food left. "...I'm still eating. I'll catch up with you guys."
"Okay."
"Laters!"
"Don't take too long."
"See you guys," Nashi muttered, watching as they left. Now alone, she shakily held her face in her hands.
What was happening? What was wrong with her? She began to squirm and tug at her dress again. Why was it getting even tighter, now? And how did her petticoat go from itchy to stabbing? And why were her shoes now crushing her feet?
Nashi turned her head. Looking to the section of the ballroom that adults were sitting at. Her parents had said they wouldn't stay the whole time. Maybe they could go back to the room now.
Nashi stood up, albeit a bit shaky and began walking towards the adults' tables.
"Excuse me?" someone called from behind her. Nashi turned to see a small group of people behind her.
"Are you Nashi Dragneel?"
"Yeah…" Nashi answered softly.
"Can we ask you some questions?"
"I...uh…" Nashi really didn't want to talk. She glanced over her shoulder, still looking for her parents. "...uh."
"Ooh! Us too?"
Another group began to approach her.
"I...uh...I'm actually in the middle of something right now…" Nashi tried to excuse herself as she shouldered her way past the crowd.
"Oh, we'll only take a minute," another group suddenly cut her off.
"That was a very brave thing you did," another group came up on her left.
"Indeed. How did you find the courage to do that?" another group came up on her right.
The two groups from before came up behind her.
Nashi was now surrounded by strangers trying to ask her questions.
"Really...this isn't a good time…" Nashi tried to say, but her voice was getting quieter and quieter as her throat grew tighter and tighter.
"How did you even think to do that?"
"How did you know it would work?"
"Do you know why we wanted to do that?"
Nashi jumped, looking about, certain she heard Jose's voice in the crowd.
"What did you see?"
"Would you like to see what it is?"
"What did it look like?"
"Would you like to see what you'd become?"
Nashi put her hands to her ears, trying to block out the noise.
"How?"
"What?"
"Did you?"
"Did you not?"
"Are you okay?"
Nashi lifted her head. An older woman was bent over, looking at her. "Are you alright?"
Nashi shook her head, backing up slowly, her hands shakily lowering to her sides.
A hand slapped onto her shoulder, making her jump.
Something grabbing at her from the dark.
Elena grabbing her, ready for the death blow.
Hezim grabbing her, trying to take her away.
She looked up to find a well dressed man with a big smile looking down at her. "Don't be shy, buttercup, tell us all the juicy details."
"Let me go!" Nashi snapped, pulling away. Everyone gasped and took a step back. Nashi's stomach dropped at all the horrified and shocked stares aimed towards her.
"Sorry...I didn't mean...I just…"
"It's alright, pumpkin," the well-dressed man stepped towards her again. "The spotlight takes one getting used to, doesn't…"
"Please," Nashi's voice grew quiet as her throat grew tight again. "I just...just...wanna find my mom and dad…"
"Your mom and dad?" someone asked. "What do they think of their little hero?"
"Please...I just wanna…" begged as she suddenly found herself unable to breathe. "I just...please...I want…"
Her heart began pounding. Her vision blurred and doubled. Her body went numb. Her mind raced as what felt like a million different voices shouted at her.
FWOOM!
Nashi was vaguely aware of the fact that she was falling.
CRASH!
She collapsed onto something cold. Thousands of points shot through her hands as she crawled along wherever she was, gasping for breath.
It was dark. She couldn't see around her.
Her heart rate shot sky high!
No! She was back! She was back in the void.
"I know what you are. You're a monster."
Her arms buckled underneath her. Her face smashed against the ground. She tugged at her hair, breath catching in tiny, quick gasps.
She found herself standing in a burning building.
"Stop…" Nashi begged.
She gasped. She recognized this building. The guild hall! But why was it on fire? And why-
"Nashi?"
Nashi screamed as she looked down on the ground.
"Nashi, use Thea! Thea!"
"Thea…"
There were her parents, lying at her feet, dead!
And behind them Layla, Igneel, Kyri, and Luna.
And around them everyone else. All her aunts and uncles. All of the other children. Cato, Persephone, Koree, Roman.
And Storm?
Where was Storm?
"Stop!" Nashi whirled around to find Storm on his knees, tugging at the robe of a menacing figure standing over him.
"Stop!" Storm sobbed as he looked up at the figure. "Why are you doing this?"
"Get away from him!" Nashi screamed as she ran towards them, conjuring her swords back into her hands.
"Why?" Storm kept asking as Nashi charged towards them. "Why are you doing this, Nashi?"
Nashi stopped.
No.
That couldn't be right.
The figure held out a hand.
Nashi screamed as she saw one of her Iapetus swords appearing in the figure's palm.
"No, stop, Nashi please, don't!" Storm begged. "Nashi, please, I lov-"
The sword slid through Storm's chest and he fell down dead. The figure turned around and Nashi fell to her knees, holding both hands to her mouth.
It was her.
Her hair was short and more gray than pink.
Her face was free of its rosy cheeks, and her freckles were replaced by sores.
Her eyes were dull rather than sparkling.
But still, it was her.
Nashi began to sob as her, this other version of her, walked towards her and stood over her.
"Do you see what you are now?" this other her asked.
"No…" Nashi shook her head, tears pouring down her face "No, this isn't me! I can't...I won't…"
"But you will," the other hero said. "Because you can't help it. You're a monster."
"No, I'm not!" Nashi screamed, jumping to her feet. "I'm not a monster! I'm not like you!"
"Like me?" the other girl laughed. "But you ARE me!"
"No!" Nashi screamed, closing her eyes.
"Yes," the other her hissed. Nashi opened her eyes again, but the other her was gone. Nashi looked down at herself and screamed. She was now dressed in that other hers robes, and blood, her family's blood, stained her arms and clothes.
"This is what you are…"
A scream erupted through Nashi, tearing through her throat with searing force. She pushed herself back up onto her feet, trying to run, but tripping on her dress. Her throat and chest tightened once again, making it hard to breath.
Nashi pulled at her dress, tearing the bodice. She continued tearing at it, ripping it away from her until she felt she could breathe again. She tried to run, but tripped over the torn fragments of her gown.
She bawled her hands into fists, her fingers digging into…
Dirt?
Nashi looked around.
She wasn't back in the void.
She was on the lawn of the Fiore Royal palace, bits and pieces of her dress scattered in smoking, smoldering fragments here and there, surrounding her in a thin veil of smoke.
Nashi stumbled back slightly, just staring at her surroundings. The tightness that had made it so hard for her to breathe left, leaving her entire body trembling. Nashi looked down at herself as her hands shook uncontrollably. The remnants of her dress hung loosely off her body. She tried to push them back in place, but it didn't matter. She was a mess. There was no way she could go back in there even if she wanted to.
Did she want to?
Where else could she go?
Back to the hotel?
Back to Magnolia?
Just runaway and forget everything?
What was she supposed to do?
What was happening to her?
What was wrong?
This, whatever it was, couldn't be good. What was she supposed to do now?
"Nashi…"
Nashi gasped at the sound of her name.
Lucy was standing behind her, both hands clasped to her mouth, her eyes wide.
"M...Mommy…" Nashi stuttered. "I...I can explain…" she began, trying to think up some sort of excuse.
"Nashi…" Lucy whispered again.
Nashi looked back at her mother, noticing sparkling, crimson flames surrounding her eyes.
Nashi gasped. When did she activate Thea? Did that mean her mother had…
"Did...did you see it…?" Nashi asked, voice and bottom lip quivering.
The lights faded from around Lucy's eyes as she slowly nodded.
Her mother saw it. She'd seen that other version of her. That version that killed her, and her father, and her siblings. Her mother now knew that she…
Nashi turned and ran.
"Nashi, wait!" Lucy called, chasing after her.
Nashi ignored her mother as she ran. She didn't know where she was going, she just ran. Trying to get as far from her mother, and any damage she may have done. Why had she been so stupid as the activate Thea in the middle of that! And she activated it on her mother of all people! She was never going to be able to go back home now. Her parents would never let stay with them now that they knew she was-
"Nashi!" someone jumped in front of her, grabbing her by the arms.
"Let me go!" Nashi squealed, fire emitting from her fists as she beat on the arms of whoever was holding her, but to no avail.
"Nashi, stop," whoever it was holding her suddenly pulled her close and wrapped their arms around her. Nashi struggled, looking up to try and see who it was.
It was Natsu.
"Daddy, please, let me-"
"No," Natsu said in a soft but firm voice.
"Daddy, please, you don't-"
"I do. I saw."
Nashi gasped. "...Thea…"
"Yeah," Natsu answered.
Nashi crumpled, a frustrated, raw scream ripping through her as her legs buckled under her. Her father had seen it too! How was she so stupid! When did she even do that! She didn't remember activating Thea at any point, but apparently she did!
"Sh," Natsu whispered, never releasing his grip on her as he slowly lowered himself and his daughter to the ground. He pulled her limp and shaking body into his lap and began rocking her back and forth.
"Sh," he whispered. "It's alright, I've got you."
More screams of frustration ripped through Nashi, in between her gasping and shaking sobs.
"I've got you," Natsu repeated, running his hand over her hair.
Lucy caught up to her daughter, dropping to her knees next to her and Natsu. She leaned her head against the top of Nashi's as she wrapped her arms around her daughter's trembling shoulders.
"It's okay, Nashi," she whispered.
"No...No it's not…" Nashi sniffled as she began to squirm. "P...pl...please let go of me…"
"Not right now," Natsu said. "Not until you calm down."
Nashi shook her head. "But I...I have to go…"
"Go where?" Lucy asked.
"Away."
"Away?"
"You saw...you saw it...both of you...I have to go away now so..." Nashi stuttered.
"Nashi," Natsu sighed as he tightened his arms around her and began rocking her once more.
"Nashi's, there's nothing that could make me or your father stop loving you," Lucy said, rubbing Nashi's back.
"No way," Natsu agreed, tucking her head under his chin.
Lucy glanced over at her husband, noticing tears slipping from the corners of his eyes, similar to her own weeping eyes.
Nashi continued to tremble and sob as both of her parents held her, rocking her, stroking her hair, trying to comfort her. Slowly her trembling went away, though she still sniffled and cried.
"Nashi," Lucy began quietly, trying to pick her words carefully. "What we just saw. How did that happen? How did you see that?"
Nashi shuddered slightly, burying her face deeper into Natsu's shirt.
"You haven't told us anything about your time looking for us," Lucy continued. "We don't know what-"
"Jose," Nashi sharply answered.
"What!?" Natsu gasped.
"I ran into a guy named Jose. He's the one who showed me…" Nashi shuddered again.
"Jose!? Jose Porla!?" Natsu shouted. "What else did he do? How did you find you? What did-"
Nashi shook her head, face still buried in her father's shirt.
"Nashi, what did-" Natsu began again.
Nashi began crying again as she shook her head again. "I don't want to-Please don't-Please don't make me talk about it. Please…"
Natsu sighed, clearly not satisfied and still angry, but he nodded, patting her hair. "Okay. Okay, we won't force you to talk about it. But when you're ready we're here."
Nashi nodded, still crying softly, but still shivering.
"C'mon," Natsu said, patting Lucy's shoulder to get her to stand up. "Let's get you back to the hotel."
"But...the others…" Nashi asked.
"I'll ask around, see if someone else can watch them," Lucy said, wiping her face before kissing the top of Nashi's head. "I'll meet you there, okay?"
Nashi nodded, never lifting her head.
Despite the fact that she was twelve and on the brink of being a teenager Natsu carried her all the way back to the hotel, only setting her down once they got inside the suite. Nashi shuffled towards her room, closing the door and locking it behind her.
Natsu just collapsed onto the couch covering his face in his hands.
He'd known. He had known that something had happened to her. But he didn't think it was quite that horrific. And that was just one small snapshot of what she'd been through for all he knew. There could be more. More horror she'd face and had not told him and Lucy yet.
He balled his hands into fists and slammed them onto the coffee table in front of him.
Had she not had enough? She was only twelve for crying out loud! No twelve-year-old little girl should have to go through even half the stuff Nashi had. And yet life decided to just keep piling it on her! Why couldn't his baby just catch a break?
He wasn't even sure what had happened. She was just gone. Not just from the party. But from reality. He and Lucy found her crumpled and crying in the yard, but they couldn't get to her. They tried to talk to her, call her name, hold her, but she didn't respond. Natsu had finally taken off to try and find someone when Thea's flames came around his eyes.
Then he saw it.
That horrid, horrid nightmare. He'd thought that vision was gone for good, Carla's bad prediction proven wrong twelve years ago, but there it was again.
Then as suddenly as it appeared it disappeared. And he heard Lucy screaming Nashi's name. He'd run back just in time to stop Nashi in a mad dash to who-knew-where, sobbing hysterically. And now here they were. Now what? How was he supposed to make this better?
He heard the bedroom door creak open. He sat back up as Nashi shuffled back into the living room, dressed in her pajamas, a quilt wrapped around her shoulders.
"Hey, Firecracker," Natsu said softly.
Nashi shuffled towards him, lying down on the couch and pillowing her head in his lap. Natsu ran his hand over her hair, wanting to say or do something that comforted her, but not knowing anything that could.
"Daddy?" Nashi finally whispered after a long pause.
"Yes?" Natsu asked.
Nashi took in a deep breath, clearly nervous about whatever she was going to say. "What happened before I was born?"
Natsu flinched, knowing exactly what she was talking about, but still asked: "What do you mean?" In the hopes that he was wrong.
"Did someone try to take me?" Nashi asked.
Natsu sighed. "Yes."
Nashi gasped, flinching as if she had been hit. So it was all true. Everything Jose told her. She began to tremble. Her throat grew tight.
"You're a monster."
"Hey," Natsu whispered, pushing her hair out of her face which was beginning to contort and grimace. His heart skipped a beat. Whatever it was that Nashi had gone through minutes ago it was about to happen again. When she'd just stood there, gasping for air, crumpled in a heap, not responding to anything he or Lucy said or did, forcing him to try and run to get help.
"Nashi, can you still hear me?"
Nashi nodded her head.
"Okay," Natsu sighed in relief. She wasn't gone yet. He could still reach her. "Alright. I don't know what Jose told you about what happened before you were born, but here's what happened. Remember when your Mommy and I told you we found a prophecy about you?" Natsu asked.
Nashi nodded, tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Well, we weren't the only one who found it. There were three other men, long standing enemies of Fairy Tail, who figured it out. Jose was one of them. These guys wanted to kidnap you and…"
Natsu's voice began to falter as he thought back to those terrifying days. "...and they wanted to turn you into a weapon."
"Weapon?" Nashi asked numbly.
"They wanted to use you against Fairy Tail. Because they knew we would never fight back against you."
"Why not?" Nashi asked.
"Because we love you," Natsu replied.
Nashi's bottom lip quivered as more tears ran down her face. Natsu wiped them away as he continued.
"We love you. And we fought so hard to make sure you'd be safe. To keep them away from you," he sighed deeply, his own tears threatening to fall. "But one of them still got to you. All these years later, he still got to you."
"What happened to the other two?" Nashi asked in a hushed voice.
"They're in jail," Natsu answered.
"How'd Jose die?" Nashi asked.
"One of his partners turned on him and killed him," Natsu replied, voice a bit shaky. "So...he could have you all to himself."
"But he didn't kill the other one?" Nashi asked, voice still soft and dull.
"No. But he tried. Nearly did. Rune Knights got to him before he died. Jose just wasn't as lucky."
"And then what happened to him? The one who betrayed the other two?"
"I stopped him," Natsu answered plainly.
Nashi gasped, finally a small light appearing in her eyes as she rolled over to look at her father. Natsu noticed this. That madness that was threatening to overtake was beginning to fade, so he kept going.
"I almost killed him, but I stopped. I had to. You were already on the way and I had to get to your mom as soon as possible. I had to let her know that it was gonna be okay, that could go ahead and bring you into this world because you were safe. So she did. I had spent so many months just...terrified of losing you. Then I saw you for the first time and everything was right again."
Nashi sniffled as tears rolled down her face once more. Natsu wiped them away and cupped her face.
"You were just a tiny little thing, but man were you loud!"
Nashi chuckled a little bit, though tears still spilled from her eyes.
"I bet everyone in the guild hall heard you crying because you were so loud. And mad. You tried to fight Porlyusica the minute you were born, swinging your tiny little arms and legs around like crazy. Then your Mommy got to hold you. And I really got to have a good look at you. And you were just perfect. I couldn't stop telling you mother how beautiful you were. Then you grabbed onto my finger."
Natsu took his daughter's hand into his, intertwining his fingers with hers. A soft smile spread on her face.
"Your hand was so small it could barely fit all the way around my thumb, but you already had a tight grip. You were already strong. And then you looked at me and you smiled the most adorable smile I'd ever seen. I remember feeling like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders, because I knew then that no matter what you were going to be okay."
Nashi's smile faded as she pulled her hand out of Natsu's and tucked it under her blanket.
"But I'm not," she whimpered. "I'm okay."
"I know," Natsu answered softly. "I know you're not, but you will be."
Nashi shook her head.
"You will be," Natsu assured her. "You're not okay right now, but you'll get better."
"I don't even know what's wrong," Nashi sniffled. "Because I don't feel sick. Or sad. Or mad. I just feel...feel...nothing. I feel nothing. And then all of a sudden I feel it all. Everything. At once, and I just-just...I don't know what to do!"
"That's okay," Natsu said, stroking her hair. "You don't have to figure it out right now."
"But I want to," Nashi said. "I don't like this."
"I don't either. I don't like watching you go through this."
"So what do I do?" Nashi asked, voice quivering though she had no more tears to cry.
Natsu sighed. "Right now, you're going to take a deep breath. Then you're going to go wash your face. Then you're going to go to bed, go to sleep, and we'll try again tomorrow."
"I don't want to go to bed," Nashi muttered.
"Nashi-"
"If I go to bed it might come back."
"Oh," Natsu sighed.
"Can't I just sleep here?"
"What's the difference between here and your bed?"
"You're here."
Natsu sighed again. He wasn't sure what good he was going to be. This wasn't a threat he could fight off. But if being here made his little girl feel better, then he would gladly play along.
"Alright, we'll stay here," he replied, wiping the drying tears off her face.
Nashi rolled onto her side, her head still pillowed in his lap as he stroked her hair. They were both quiet for a while, Natsu waiting for her to go to sleep.
"Daddy?" Nashi asked softly.
"Yes?"
"If you could have known when I was born what was going to happen...would you change anything?"
Natsu shook his head. "Not a damn thing."
"Lucky Mommy's not here," Nashi chuckled softly.
"I'm a grown man I can curse every now and then if I want, dammit."
"But I can't?" Nashi asked in a tired but sarcastic voice.
"Hey, you're not thirteen yet, stop with the teenage sass," Natsu said, playfully tapping her on the brow.
Nashi tiredly chuckled again. The tension she'd been carrying all day slowly drained from her body and her eyelids fluttered close as her father kept smoothing her hair.