Distracted, Kamilah looked up from the open luggage on her bed, staring blankly at the heat packs held in front of her. A second later, she remembered that she'd asked her daughter to retrieve these very items from the storeroom.
"Oh, thank you." Kamilah took the handful of packs from Fareeha, who snorted.
"You're getting old, mama."
"I am," Kamilah sighed. It was a fact she no longer bothered to argue, not when her hairs were all grey, and she could feel an ache in her back just from bending over. Straightening herself with a groan, Kamilah kneaded her lower back with a fist, squinting at the amused expression on her daughter's face. "Don't look so smug, rascal. One day, you'll be in my place."
"But not for a long, long, long–"
"Alright, I get it," Kamilah cut in, rolling her eyes when Fareeha cackled. She plucked the towel from her luggage and flung it into Fareeha's face, though it only served to muffle her laughs for a moment.
Fareeha took the towel and folded it between her hands, giving it back to Kamilah. "How long are you going for?"
"A week."
"Why not longer? You have the time...and you didn't visit last year."
Because your ami won't have the time, was the first answer to rise, which Kamilah stifled before it could reach her tongue. "Because I can't stand the cold longer than that."
"You never could. Every time we go, you're bundled up like a human popsicle."
"You know, I'm starting to regret asking you to come home."
"Fine, fine." Fareeha relented with a laugh, holding her hands up. "I'll stop...for now."
Kamilah huffed, placing the towel back into her luggage. She passed an eye over its contents, ticking off a mental checklist, then looked up at Fareeha. "Are you sure you don't want to come along?"
"Nah." Fareeha waved a hand dismissively. "I'll just stay behind. Watch the house…"
"Throw a party?"
"What? No! Besides, who'd dare come to Colonel Amari's house for a party?"
Now it was Kamilah's turn to be amused. "I guess it does pay off to be scary, after all," she drawled, lowering the lid of her luggage. "You really don't want to come along? You didn't get to go last year either."
Though Fareeha's casual smile never left her face, Kamilah noticed the sliver of stiffness in her demeanour. "Nope."
"You haven't seen your ami in a while too."
"Nothing new," Fareeha said before thinking, and she grimaced when Kamilah's gaze turned sharp. "Look, I just...don't feel like going, alright?"
Kamilah considered pressing the issue, but as she watched unease creep into Fareeha's expression, she desisted. No point forcing the girl – she was as stubborn as her mother. Besides, the two had barely spoken since Fareeha enlisted, and it'd only make the reunion more...awkward, to say the least.
"Fine," Kamilah said, and Fareeha seemed to relax a little. "Since you'll be staying here, you will take care of the house while I'm gone."
"Don't worry, it'll still be standing when you come back." Fareeha shot her a lopsided smirk, standing akimbo with all puff and bravado – a confident image she'd built since surviving boot camp. She'd done it with flying colours, and was well on track to earning an officer's bars upon graduation from the academy. Kamilah had followed her daughter's progress at every step of the way; to say that she was proud of the girl was an understatement.
"Want anything from Zurich?"
"Chocolates," Fareeha replied without having to think. "Oh! If you can, get the ones Angela used to give us. Those were the best. Hm." Her brows drew together in a frown. "Haven't seen her or Jesse for a long time now…"
"And…?" Kamilah said expectantly.
"Next time. Promise," she added, when she caught onto her mother's disappointment.
Zurich's weather was as cold on Kamilah's skin as always, and the words 'human popsicle' floated through her mind in Fareeha's voice, as she pulled on a thick jacket in the airport. Ana, who was dressed in much thinner clothes, picked her up as always, but her wife was drawn away from her side the moment they set foot in the Overwatch headquarters. Though disappointed, Kamilah was unsurprised, and resigned herself to the cold as she ventured into the city alone, wandering around to take in the sights and sounds she'd missed for a year. It was a much more peaceful walk than one she'd have in the bustling Cairo streets, and Kamilah spent a long time walking about, before returning to her quarters with a clearer mind.
The rest of her day was spent waiting by herself, until Ana finally appeared with a mumbled apology, and an empty stomach which she sated with some instant oats despite Kamilah's insistence on preparing something more substantial. She'd shot a fond, apologetic look at Kamilah over the rim of her mug, before tilting it up to empty its contents into her mouth. It was a meal she took often, Kamilah guessed. To think that Ana used to nag her for relying on lacklustre meals like this…
She did appreciate, however, the effort Ana made to set what little time aside for themselves. No doubt the Captain had a thousand and one matters demanding her attention, but instead of hurrying back to her office, Ana retrieved a teapot from her cabinet to brew a simple blend they liked sharing together. Not many words were exchanged as they sipped from their cups, though Ana did ask about home and Fareeha, and shared the few non-confidential details of her work thus far. Kamilah listened, watching quietly the crinkles at Ana's eyes and the curve of her lips, all painting a frustrated expression while her wife vented as vaguely as possible about her workload – which, obviously, never seemed to end. In fact, it had never paused for even a single day since Ana had moved to Zurich. If she wasn't tired of it, Kamilah definitely was.
"So, retire," Kamilah said, and though she put no hope behind it, regret burgeoned after she spoke. Ana's expression turned stiff, much in the same fashion as Fareeha's, and Kamilah wished she could take her words back.
"I wish," Ana said with a half-hearted laugh, treading carefully into a sore subject. "But there's never rest for the wicked."
Kamilah managed a sliver of a smile while Ana looked away, then raised her cup to her lips, taking a sip to soothe the sore spot in her heart. She kept her eyes fixed on the old carpet beneath Ana's small coffee table, aware of the little glances shot in her direction, and she closed her eyes briefly while taking a long draught of warm tea. She took a quiet breath as warmth travelled down to her chest, and shook off the faint resentment which had dug into her. Picking up the teapot, she refilled both their cups and sought to break the uncomfortable silence.
"How about going home?" Kamilah asked. It wasn't the best subject to broach either, but it was less impossible than convincing Ana to retire, at least. "It's been more than a year since you've gone back."
Ana kept silent for a while, then delivered the answer Kamilah expected. "Sorry, Milah. But...not now. It's really busy here."
"Isn't it always," Kamilah replied simply, giving a dry smile which did little to comfort Ana, if her uneasy expression was anything to go by. "At least think about it, alright? Cairo is still your home. And you're still my wife. Not to mention Fareeha's mother."
It was a reminder Kamilah intended to hit home, and Ana's grimace told her it succeeded. "I know. But does she even want to see me?"
"She's–" Kamilah caught herself, noting the flash of anger within her, and backed away. She's your daughter, she'd wanted to say, but pursed her lips instead. She knew it wouldn't work, and so chose to leave it alone. "It's up to you," was what she settled with, before draining her cup of tea.
Ana rested a hand over hers before she could move away, and she met Ana's gaze reluctantly.
"I'll try, Milah," Ana said gently. "I promise."
Kamilah stared back at Ana, a short moment turned long between heavy gazes, then she nodded. Another promise – nothing new.
Kamilah sat alone in the balcony of the Strike Team's barracks, leaning into soft cushions and pillows which she suspected hadn't seen use in some time. There was no trace of other agents having been here, and even the ashtray was empty, spared from the endless donations of ash from some of their smoking habits. Just as well – Kamilah wanted some privacy for herself, not that it'd been difficult to find this time. Most of the team was away, and Kamilah had to occupy her own time without Ana at her side.
She leaned her head back, staring up at the few stars in the night sky, head slightly buzzing from a rare indulgence in alcohol. Yawning, Kamilah closed her eyes, ready to doze off when a voice reached her ears.
"Well, well. Look who we have here." Jesse smiled when Kamilah turned her head, watching him approach. "Haven't seen you in a while, Kamilah. Heck, I didn't even know you were in base…" His voice trailed off as his gaze drifted to the half-filled bottle on the coffee table. "And I definitely didn't know my whiskey could move on its own."
"I stole it." Kamilah's lips curled into a faint smile at Jesse's chuckle. "Sorry."
"No, no. It's quite alright," Jesse replied, taking a seat beside her. He retrieved a glass from the table's drawer and poured himself a drink, leaving Kamilah's glass alone when she shook her head. "Drinking to pass the time? Captain's busy, huh?"
"Like always."
Jesse smiled, downing his whiskey in one go. "Well, hope you don't mind my company." He reached into his pocket and withdrew a cigar, then was taken aback when Kamilah swatted it from his hand.
"No smoking with me," Kamilah said, and Jesse gave a sheepish laugh.
"Right. Sorry." He took the fallen cigar from his lap and pocketed it. "Angie's the same with me too. I'm afraid she'll cut my hands off the next time I try to smoke in front of her…"
"Good," Kamilah declared, but let a smile break through her poker face – just to let him know she was joking. "Did you just return from a mission?"
"Yep." Jesse downed another glass of whiskey, then fell back heavily into the couch. "Earlier than expected too. At least I can grab some rest before Reyes punts me across the map again."
"Been busy, hm?"
"Yeah. We all have," Jesse sighed, crossing his hands behind his head. He lifted his feet as if to rest them on the table, but set them back on the floor after a moment of hesitation. "Lil birdie didn't come again, huh?"
"No. She wanted to stay home this time."
"Still avoiding the Captain, I see," Jesse said so casually, that it drew a double-take from Kamilah. He noticed her reaction, and gave her another smile. "We've been in touch."
Kamilah frowned. She hadn't expected an outsider to know of her family's...happenings. "How much do you know?"
"Well, not too much, to be honest. Fareeha never mentioned anything specific. But we've known each other for so long, there's some things you can...pick up on, you know?" The cigar appeared in Jesse's hand again, but before Kamilah could give him a chide, he started twirling it between his fingers. Then the cigar paused, and he glanced at her. "Like someone who doesn't usually drink...taking an entire bottle of whiskey from the pantry."
Despite herself, Kamilah huffed. "Don't try to read me, cowboy."
"Yes, ma'am," he said, tossing her a two-finger salute with his metallic hand. "But – if you'll permit me. I'd say don't worry. About Fareeha, at least. She still loves the both of you. Just has some trouble separating herself from the...family legacy, you know?"
"I know."
"Be patient, Kamilah. She'll come around eventually." Jesse twirled his cigar one last time, then shoved it back into his pocket. "And if the wait gets too long...hey. At least you can have a drink while waiting." He wore a lop-sided grin when Kamilah looked at him, as he sat up and reached for the bottle. "More whiskey for you, ma'am?"
Kamilah watched as he poured himself a glass, then she laughed to herself. Of all the people to be counselled by, she'd least expected the self-styled cowboy in Overwatch's ranks, who was of the same age as the daughter she fretted over. She looked into his dark eyes, seeing the traces of age longer than the years he'd lived, and wished she would never see the same in Fareeha.
"I'll have one more, then. Just for you, cowpoke."
Jesse's grin brightened. "Honoured, ma'am."
The week in Zurich passed slower than expected. Kamilah, mostly left to her own devices, spent much of the time trying to quell her boredom with repeated trips into the city, all the while waiting for the next moment she could spend with Ana. It was odd, how she felt even more lonesome here, while Ana was within reach, than she was back in Cairo. Perhaps it was easier to ignore the strain in her marriage, when she was far removed from the very reason for that strain. Perhaps it was easier to make excuses for Ana when her wife wasn't sparing her the briefest peck on the cheek, uttering a distracted greeting before she strode away without a single glance back.
Perhaps, Kamilah was starting to think, that Fareeha had the right idea after all.
Unconsciously, she began to look forward to her flight back home. She woke with mild happiness on her last morning in Zurich, before it's marred by reluctance when Ana brought her out for breakfast, then drove her to the airport. Ana held her hand as they walked towards the departure hall, but before Kamilah could break free, she was stopped by a gentle tug on her hand.
"Milah," Ana said. "I've looked at my schedule, and I'll probably be taking time off in November. I'll come home then, alright?"
It was news she'd least expected, and Kamilah took a few seconds to process it. "Ana, if you're busy, you don't have to–"
Ana smiled, wry and tired. "It's long overdue, Milah. I'm sorry. And...I think I need the break, anyway."
A squeeze on her hand, and Kamilah couldn't believe how quickly she grew soft under Ana's gaze. "Good. See you then." She leaned forward and pressed her lips to Ana's cheek. "I love you, amar."
"Love you too–" Ana said softly, but was cut off by what sounded suspiciously like a camera shutter.
Both of them frowned, and turned towards the source of the noise – a man wearing a parka, looking flustered as he fumbled with the phone in his hands.
"I thought we were over this," Ana growled. She turned to Kamilah, waving her into the departure hall. "Go on, I'll take care of this."
"Make sure he's still breathing after you're done," Kamilah warned, getting a smirk from Ana as she walked in the reporter's direction.
Kamilah entered the departure hall by herself, eager to get away from any attention she'd gathered just by being with Ana. But before she went any farther, her curiosity won out, and Kamilah turned around to look through the glass walls. Ana was still advancing on the reporter, who was shifting uncertainly on his feet, as though unsure to run away or stay for a reprimand from Captain Ana Amari herself. It seemed he'd decided on escape at the last minute, but it was too late – Ana had grabbed him by the lapel of his jacket, yanked him back, and started speaking with a dangerous smile on her lips.
God help him, Kamilah thought, as she turned away from the scene, unaware of the smile on her own face.
Kamilah went back to missing Ana again when she landed in Cairo, but it was nothing new – just part and parcel of being Captain Amari's family. Besides, she had a concrete promise from Ana, something to look forward to, and the thought was enough to lighten her steps for the following days. Then, as if the prospect of a family reunion wasn't enough, Fareeha contributed to occupying Kamilah's mind as well – though not in the best of ways.
It was just another day in the office, until she overheard news of a certain someone landing in the hospital, due to an accident in field training. Kamilah first heaved a sigh, then rode her bike over to the hospital, where she found Fareeha lying in a ward. Despite the cast on her arm and leg, Fareeha was grinning and laughing along with four other soldiers who sat around her bed – Kamilah recognised them as her squad. They continued chatting jovially until Fareeha caught sight of Kamilah's approach, and shot her mother a smile. The rest followed her line of sight, then jumped out of their chairs as if jolted by lightning. Kamilah had to bite down a smile when they saluted in unison, while the patient merely rolled her eyes.
"I was wondering when you'd arrive," Fareeha drawled. "Here to scold me, I bet."
Kamilah smiled, but kept quiet. Her daughter didn't buy a single second of her act, but the others were sufficiently cowed by Kamilah's presence alone. One even offered his chair to her, holding it like a butler, and Kamilah raised a brow before taking a seat.
"Thank you."
"No problem–, I mean. Yes, ma'am."
Kamilah regarded the young man with amusement, then passed her gaze over his friends. "So tell me," she said slowly, as her eyes returned to Fareeha. "What happened?"
"An accident, ma'am," said the woman standing opposite. She stood and spoke so steadily that Kamilah was almost impressed. "We didn't...respond well when we were ambushed by an omnic."
"You mean you panicked," Kamilah said, having read the report and watched the attached recording as well. "An OR-15 broke through your flank, then some idiot thought she could wrestle it into submission." She looked pointedly at Fareeha, who gave a sheepish chuckle which spread to her squad. "You laugh, but it would've gotten you killed in a real engagement."
The young soldiers fell silent then, glancing at one another. Kamilah thought they would've stood in place forever, before Fareeha finally threw them a line.
"Alright, go get some rest yourselves, guys. Let me deal with the colonel." She nodded at Kamilah, and got a smattering of hesitant laughs, before the squad bid their farewells and walked out of the ward. Fareeha waited a few seconds after her squad had walked out of sight, then said, "Think you made them shit their pants."
"Glad to know I still have it," Kamilah said drily. "Now, if only it worked on you."
"It never will, mama. I've seen you in a dino onesie, remember?"
Kamilah groaned. She'd forgotten about the time Ana had made them play dress-up with Fareeha, to match with the girl's blue bird onesie. "No, I don't."
"You do now." Fareeha grinned again, and Kamilah was reminded of someone else who'd worn the same unrepentant grin on hospital beds.
Kamilah sighed, slapping the girl gently above her arm cast. "If you can stay serious for even one minute, Fareeha. Then you wouldn't end up like this."
"To be fair, I was quite serious when our flank was broken."
"I forgot to mention that you have to think clearly as well."
Fareeha chuckled. "Alright, mama. You made your point. The training did too, for that matter." She moved her bandaged limbs. "Man, showering is gonna be a bitch for a while."
"You'll get used to it," Kamilah said. "And – you're coming home to recover. No arguments."
"Oh, I don't plan to argue. I wanna go home and be treated like a princess. It'll be a dream come true."
"You're already a pampered baby, you little scoundrel." Kamilah pinched her nose, getting a crude, muffled snort from her daughter.
Fareeha rubbed her nose when Kamilah let go, the smile never leaving her face. "Love you too, mama."
Kamilah sighed, and rose from her chair. "I'm going back to the office. I'll come back later in the evening, alright?"
"Okay," Fareeha replied, as Kamilah kissed her forehead.
As it turned out, Fareeha was as much a handful as Ana when she was injured. Despite having two casts, she insisted on hobbling around as much as she could. She would stand and stick out her tongue when Kamilah ordered her to remain seated, and attempted to eat with her bandaged arm despite having to tilt her head at an awkward angle, while most of the food spilled from her spoon.
It was all to poke at Kamilah, of course – Fareeha seemed to take much pleasure in Kamilah's exasperation. And her mother did give much leeway for her shenanigans, though Kamilah had drawn a hard line at climbing the stairs. Fareeha had refused to use the guest room on the ground floor, and climbed up to her own bedroom on the first night. But when Kamilah was woken by a loud crash the next morning, and rushed out to find her daughter collapsed at the foot of the stairs – thankfully missing her injured limbs in the fall – she expressly forbade Fareeha from using the stairs. At least, until she got used to her limited movements.
Still, Fareeha seemed quite happy with her temporary lot as a 'pampered baby', and aside from making Kamilah's eye twitch with the constant thuds of her crutch across the floor, she mostly behaved and didn't try to injure herself further. Kamilah must admit that she was taking some pleasure in having Fareeha home as well, taking the chance to shove bowls of fruit or snacks into her daughter's hands, or even just help Fareeha to dress when she got stuck in her shirts. It was like having a toddler in her care once more, except this child was much taller and independent, and could even fry eggs and bacon with one hand, just to impress her mother in the morning.
Just for the feat alone, Kamilah impressed her daughter in kind with a large bowl of ice cream that night, which made Fareeha squeal in delight. Such desserts could rarely be found in the mess hall, and certainly not one of such a large serving. Kamilah thought she heard the girl giggle as she shoved a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth, and glanced at her daughter in amusement before turning back to the TV, sipping her guava juice.
The news came on, and soon enough, a familiar white-and-yellow logo appeared on screen, accompanied by the distinctive blue of Overwatch's uniform. They'd held a conference the day before, to address concerns over a difficult peacekeeping mission which had nearly led to an outbreak of violence. Commander Morrison and Captain Amari were in the spotlight once more, and Kamilah stared at the Captain's face as she calmly delivered a scripted response promising caution and diligence in the future.
When the news piece ended, Kamilah glanced at Fareeha, who was watching the screen with a placid look on her face.
"Your ami's coming home in November."
Fareeha raised her brows, genuinely surprised. "Yeah? Did you buy a lottery ticket?"
"Fareeha."
"Ugh, yeah. I got it. Yay," Fareeha said flatly.
"Try to make time for her, alright?" Kamilah said, ignoring her daughter's obvious displeasure. "If we're having a reunion, we're going to have a nice one."
Fareeha's lips twitched, no doubt with unspoken argument. But she sighed, expression softening as she looked at Kamilah. "Yeah, fine. On one condition," she added when Kamilah patted her head, and held her empty bowl up. "More ice cream?"
Kamilah laughed, rapping her knuckles at Fareeha's temple. "You greedy little baby."