Hermione had always vowed that she would never be a clingy girlfriend. The time her and Ron spent apart helped with this. She would never be another Lavender; she had seen first-hand how that had gone. Nevertheless, the hour while Ron was out of the flat seemed to drag.
She took her time in the shower; exploring her body again for any signs of the growing life inside her in the mirror once she was done. She felt there was a big sign over her head, flashing 'pregnant teen' in bright neon letters. She was being stupid; nothing was out of the ordinary and she was able to pull on her jeans and t-shirt without any difficulties. She left her hair to air dry and joined Harry on the sofa.
"Hey!" Harry lifted an arm and smiled as Hermione nestled up to his side. They had always been close and Harry felt almost as concerned for her as Ron was right now. "You okay? Ron ran out of here pretty quickly this morning..."
"He's gone to buy bagels. Don't worry, he'll get you one too!"
"Amazing! Doesn't even start to make up for you coming home without Ginny though..." Harry gave her a mock accusatory look.
"I think she would have come if she were allowed. She was really worried about leaving me to take the Knight Bus alone! It's a shame you missed her game last week, she was amazing!"
"So I heard! The offers from the professional teams should be pouring in; although I know she has her eyes set on the Harpies! Then I can take a step out of the spotlight!" Harry laughed softly. "Seriously though, are you okay? Ron and I used to have to force you out of school for our adventures..."
"I'm not, but I will be..." Hermione rested her head against Harry's shoulder, deciding it would be better to tell him what was going on; especially if she was going to be staying at the flat. She took her time and surprised herself with how steady her voice was and how calm she felt about it all. "Ron's taking me to St. Mungo's this afternoon..."
Harry listed to what Hermione was saying carefully, without interrupting her. Eventually, he nodded softly and kissed the top of her head. "Thank you for telling me. It must have been a nightmare for you..."
"I was mostly scared about telling Ron, but he's been amazing!"
"Don't be too surprised, he's top of our class for a reason!" Harry grinned, obviously happy for his best friend to have the limelight for a while. "If there's anything I can help with, please let me know..."
Hermione smiled and settled closer to Harry. "Thank you..." She turned her attention to whatever awful breakfast TV show Harry had been watching.
When Ron returned they were still curled up on the sofa. He hung his coat up and threw the bag of food down on the coffee table.
"Oy Harry! Just because your girlfriend isn't here, doesn't mean you have to steal mine!" He smiled and settled into the armchair.
They spent the morning lazing around the flat. As much as Hermione loved spending time with Ginny, she enjoyed it just being the three of them. It was comfortable and exactly what she needed at that moment in time. They settled easily back into their banter and Hermione was grateful for the distraction.
Hermione and Ron took their time getting ready to go out, but eventually they knew they should just go and get it over with. Harry saw them to the door and pulled Hermione back into a tight hug.
"Good luck, I'll be here when you get back. I'll tidy the flat so it's nice for you..."
"Thank you..." Hermione hugged him close until she felt Ron tug at her arm. She unwrapped her arms from Harry and left the flat slowly.
Once they were outside, Ron apparated them to a quiet alleyway around the corner from St. Mungo's. He took a tight hold of her hand again as they walked around to the abandoned department store. As they got to the front of the store, the dummy lifted its head and checked the street ahead of them before signalling for them to step through the window.
They were relieved to find the waiting area quiet. Nobody paid particular attention to the young couple as they made their way over to the welcome witch. Hermione tried to be as vague as possible and nodded her thanks as she was sent to the second floor; to a wing of the hospital she had never even noticed before. She took a seat and leaned into Ron as he settled next to her.
Hermione should have known when the healer announced her name to the whole waiting area that the appointment was not going to go well. The second sign was when she had to follow her to the examination room alone. Without Ron, she immediately felt on edge and for the entire appointment; she felt like she had to justify her decisions. Abortions for reasons other than medical were almost unheard of in the Wizarding Community and at every point Hermione felt like the healer was trying to change her mind.
She was given the first of two potions and told to wait an hour before she could take the second and go home. There was nothing to read so she was left alone with her thoughts. It felt to Hermione that the healers may have used this as a deterrent, hoping that the witch may see sense and change her mind. Hermione set her jaw in determination and instead focused on reading all the posters on the wall, counting down the seconds when she could leave.
Eventually, the healer came back and gave Hermione the second potion. Hermione took it as quickly as she could before snatching the leaflets offered to her by the healer and storming out to Ron, who jumped up as soon as he saw her. His questioning eyes only fuelled her annoyance.
"It's done!" She retorted, bluntly; though she softened slightly as Ron flinched. "Sorry, I just want to get out of here..."
Ron nodded and took her hand in his before quietly getting her home.
Back at the flat, Hermione started to feel unwell again. The nausea and extreme fatigue had been replaced with painful stomach cramps. She ignored Harry jumping to his feet as they got in and made a bee line to the bedroom. Ron followed after her, throwing a poignant look at his best friend.
Hermione slept for the rest of the day and most of the night too. She woke from a nightmare in the early morning, but instead of waking Ron she took a quick shower then settled on the sofa. She knew she wouldn't be able to get back to sleep now. She picked up her book and started to read. She didn't get far into the book before she was suddenly overcome with emotion.
Harry woke as he heard someone moving around the flat. He was always a light sleeper, putting it down to all those hours spent trying to sleep in a cupboard under the stairs. As he left his room, he spotted the light on and headed towards it. He was surprised to see Hermione sat on the sofa crying quietly to herself. His heart stung with pain for her as he slid onto the sofa next to her.
"Hermione? What's wrong?" Harry pulled her to him tightly.
"I had a nightmare... I was going to read but then I just started crying and now I can't stop..."
Harry sighed and rubbed her back until she calmed down. Carefully, he pulled away and observed her quietly.
"Stupid hormones!" Hermione wiped her eyes, looking forlorn.
"Is that all this is?" He looked at her pointedly.
"I don't regret it, if that's what you're asking..." She let out a small sigh.
"Okay - but it would be okay if you did, or felt sad about it..." Harry shrugged slightly.
"I did all my research before me and Ron..." She elbowed Harry as he started to laugh. "Oh shut up, I just needed to know what to expect!" She let out a small laugh too, despite the last of her tears.
"They don't teach any of it at Hogwarts! Our kind are still stuck in the dark ages with a lot of things. The healer asked me around 15 times if I wanted to go through with it, even after I signed the permission parchment. I almost started doubting myself!"
"It's a huge thing to do..."
"It is, I agree. But just because I'm 19 it doesn't mean I don't know my own mind or what I want. I helped you kill Voldemort, for Merlin's sake and that healer knew exactly who I was!" Hermione was starting to feel herself get worked up again and dropped the volume of her voice, afraid to wake Ron. "I hate to think how many witches have put themselves through something they didn't want to because they were scared of being judged by the community!"
"You're stronger than most witches Hermione. Many others wouldn't come out of something like this and think, 'what can I change to make it better for everyone else?'"
"Oh don't get me wrong," Hermione sat up, pulling her knees up to her chest. "This weekend has been a rollercoaster of emotions. I think I've felt everything under the sun these past two days: shame, fear, sadness..." She sighed. "Now I just feel angry..."
"Angry Hermione is scary!" Harry nudged her softly. "I sometimes feel the same way about Auror training. Ron is excelling because he's used to the traditional way things are done. But some of it is so outdated. I often think what might have happened if the office had been more efficient; would Fred or Tonks or Lupin still be alive..." He trailed off and sat with her in silence for a moment. "Unfortunately, I still have two and a half years before I can graduate and make some changes..."
"It's all baby steps Harry..." Hermione kissed his cheek and pushed herself up from the sofa, wincing as a mild cramp travelled through her stomach. "Thank you for being understanding..."
"You're welcome. It will be nice having you home for the week; especially with Ron's birthday coming up..."
Hermione gave him a small smile. "I'm going to make sure he has a really good one; given how last year's went..." Hermione headed back to bed, moving slowly and deliberately.