Happy Easter to those of you to whom it matters and if you're getting time off work/school/college/uni, hope you enjoy it! Alas, I'm behind with my work due to various commitments so I'll be in the office all over the Bank Holiday weekend :( Hey ho. Anyway, enough whining, on to a big thank you to those who have read the last chapter, as always a special thanks to A for Antechinus and Sez01 for dropping a review as well, it's always a pleasure to hear what you think of where the story's going :)

Disclaimer: I own EVERYTHING in the entire world! NOT! I own a paperclip and a few staples but I don't own anything to do with The Bill. This story is purely for fun. No profit or money of any kind is made from it. The plot, however, is my own - not that anyone else would want to lay claim to it!

"Feel up to talking yet, love?" Jo asked quietly having been cradling the younger woman against her body beneath a blanket on the couch for a little over ten minutes without a word being uttered. Feeling the slight tensing of muscles that she knew would undoubtedly herald further objections to Jo staying awake, the brunette hurried to assure Lucy, "I'm happy to stay here all night with you if that's what you need but I really do think that you'd do better talking to me and then you might get some sleep. I know you don't have to work tomorrow but still, being up into the small hours of the morning isn't going to do you any good in the long run. Especially not if you're just keeping yourself awake mithering over things."

"Don't you ever just want to scream and shout at the injustice of everything?" Lucy questioned timidly, her face still buried in her lover's neck.

"Of course I do, frequently," Jo replied sincerely, waiting for further clarification on what precisely had led to Lucy's outburst.

"How do you hold it together and do your job when you see this kind of stuff happening? I mean, what has Katie ever done to anyone? She's just a kid; a harmless, innocent young girl with her whole life ahead of her. Why would someone want to take that and destroy it? What gives anyone the right to do that to any other human being?" Once the floodgates opened, Lucy found all her frustrations and anxieties pouring out of her without censor. "And why you? Why do you have to be sick? Why couldn't it be someone else? Anyone else, I don't care. Except I do care, I care so much that it makes me ill to wish something like that on someone else just so you wouldn't have to go through it. It makes me feel like an evil, cruel, despicable person for thinking that way and I hate myself for it but I can't help it. I can't help wishing that everything was ok, that I could go to sleep and wake up in the morning to find Katie hadn't been abducted and you weren't sick and my boss wasn't an obsequious toad who seems to be obsessed with me ever since I told him I was a lesbian."

Immediately, Jo's hackles rose as she honed in on that final wish, wondering if the man hadn't tried something more than Lucy had already made her aware of. "Has he touched you? Did he hurt you or already try it on?"

"No…no not really, no. I was daydreaming while making a coffee the other day – thinking about you actually – and he came in behind me. It might have been innocent, there's not all that much space in the staff room, but when he moved past me to get to the kettle, his hand touched my bum, just briefly brushed against it, not like groped it or anything. Like I say, I can't be sure it was deliberate and I certainly couldn't prove anything."

"He still has no right being that close to you in the first place, it's completely inappropriate. Sweetheart, please promise me that you'll tell me if anything else like that happens? Anything at all. And keep a log of everything that he does which makes you feel uncomfortable, even if it seems trivial. I hope that it doesn't come to it, but there might come a day when you need it all as evidence against him." Ever the police officer, Jo's mind had already turned to prosecuting the man for sexual assault or at the very least suing him for sexual harassment. "As for the rest, you are not an evil person for wishing this wasn't happening to me. If you had a specific target in mind, someone you were actually wishing this type of illness on, then yes, I might agree that that would be somewhat cruel – you're not are you? You don't have a voodoo doll somewhere of a sworn enemy or something?" Jo grinned as her lover swatted her arm.

"No I don't smart arse," Lucy responded with a playful nudge. "But it doesn't make me feel any better about wishing it."

"Honey, don't you think I've had the same thoughts? Don't you think I would give anything for this not to be happening to me? To us? Does that make me horrible? No, it just makes me human. It just means that I'd really rather be healthy and enjoying a happy, fulfilled life with my beautiful young lover instead of spending all my free time getting treatments which will either cure me or kill me, sleeping or puking my guts up. No one wishes they had to go through something like this, baby. Please, please don't beat yourself up for struggling to deal with it. Hell, I'm grateful that I'm not the only one finding it hard to cope with. You've been such a rock since this whole ordeal began, so strong, so put together, so supportive of me that I was beginning to wonder if I was just some inordinate wimp whenever I felt like falling apart. You don't have to be stoic and always so strong in front of me love. If you're hurting, it's ok to show it, in fact sometimes I think it might actually help me if we had a good cry together instead of me always crying on you."

"I'll try but I just don't want to add to your troubles. You've enough going on without adding my demons to the battle."

"For as long as we're in a partnership, Luce, your demons are my demons. It's a two way street, you help me conquer my fears and my dark days and I'll do the same for you. Together, we'll get through this and whatever else life throws our way." Jo pulled the young raven-haired beauty closer still, dropping a sweet kiss against her forehead and resting her cheek against her crown. "And honey, you need to try to stop wondering why there is evil in the world, why there are some people content to steal another's innocence or joy or even their life. Those kinds of questions are age-old and I suspect will forever remain inadequately answered. Tying yourself in knots worrying about it won't serve any purpose. And just like you pointed out to me earlier, perhaps what is best for both of us right now is to be available for Sam and Lorna as their friends, to support both of them through a difficult time and at least let them know that they're not alone." Lucy nodded realising the advice was sound but knowing that it would take more than that for her brain to accept the concept that bad things just happened.

"Thanks babe," she murmured, mind still troubled but at least feeling less alone in her turmoil.

"Why don't we go back to bed? You never know, sleep might find you a little easier if you're lying down." Jo refused to take no for an answer, whisking the blanket from around them and hauling herself to her feet before reaching down for Lucy's hand.

Sam pulled up outside her house, slewing her electric-blue Peugeot to the kerb haphazardly with little care or attention. From there, it would appear that no one was home. No lights were on, the curtains at the front of the building still stood open. For a brief moment, the DI wondered if Abi had taken off again when her mother had refused to give in to her pressure but knowing it was highly unlikely, Sam climbed out of the vehicle, thumbing the remote central locking button and making her way to the front door. As she stepped inside and pulled the door closed behind her, a crushing sense of loneliness gripped her. Veering off from her intended course up the stairs, the blonde found herself collapsing onto the sofa, curling onto her side and pulling her knees to her chest. Silent, wracking sobs shook her tired body as she let her anguish out finally; for Katie, for Lorna, for Jo, for what had almost happened to their friendship, for Lucy, for Dawid and all the other innocent victims who had fallen prey to the paedophile ring.

"Mum?" Abi's groggy voice broke through Sam's grief-ridden state. The younger blonde rushed to her mother's side as she took in the tears, the broken and beaten body language. "Mum, what is it? What's the matter?" All thoughts of her own recent dramas were superseded by the need to comfort a woman who had stood by her throughout so many trials.

"It's just been a long week, I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you. I wasn't even sure you were still here." Sam attempted to distance herself from her daughter's touch, sitting up and moving along the sofa, knees drawn up to her chest still, arms wrapped around her shins, hands clenched tightly together.

"Is it work? Has something happened? Did they find that missing girl of your colleague's?" Abi, not to be deterred sat herself at the other end of the couch, one leg tucked underneath her body as she angled herself towards where Sam was now seated.

"We don't know, not yet. It's possible. They found a body but they've not been able to positively identify it yet." Suddenly restless, Sam got up and walked into the kitchen, ignoring the head-rush she felt as her blood pressure struggled to equalise from the abrupt change in position.

"When will you know for sure? How long do these things take?" Abi asked following her mother.

"Hopefully tomorrow, depends on when DNA results are in. Until then, Lorna and her family are having to exist in limbo, not knowing whether we…they… whether they should be mourning the loss or holding out hope for her return." Sam hoped that Abi wouldn't have picked up on her unintentional slip but should have known better – she was her daughter after all.

"We? Mum, what do you mean we? You're not part of her family… are you? Is this something else you haven't told me about? Some long-lost sister you've neglected to clue me in on?"

"No! No, nothing like that. Abi it's… it's still all very new. I was hoping to talk to you about it in better circumstances." Sam sighed as she ran a tired hand through lacklustre hair, eyes closing in exasperation.

"Talk to me about what? You're not making any sense. First you're not at home and refuse to come back in favour of taking care of a 'friend', then I find you breaking your heart and now you're talking in riddles. What the hell is going on?" Abi hissed as she closed the door, not wishing to disturb her son and also wanting to cut off her mother's escape routes knowing how likely it was that the older Nixon woman would run rather than continue their discussion. "Does this friend of yours have a husband? A partner? Are you having an affair with her other half while her daughter's missing? And pretending to be her friend? 'Cause that would be a new low even for you, Mum." The sharp crack of skin on skin resounded through the kitchen as Sam's hand met forcefully with her daughter's cheek. Both women stood in shocked silence for long moments, Sam glowering unrepentantly, Abi cradling her stinging face in one palm.

"Is that really what you think of me? What you think I'd do? If so, it just shows how little you know about me Abigail. You may be my daughter but that doesn't give you the right to talk about me like that. I deserve more respect…"

"And I deserve your honesty. Haven't you learned that lying to me doesn't work? After everything we've gone through; my father, Hugh, Matt Boyden, after all of that, do you not think that telling me the truth is the least I deserve?"

"I am telling you the truth. I am not having an affair with anyone behind Lorna's back." Sam steamed on ahead, heedless of the consequences, "I am having a relationship with a parent of the missing girl but it's not like you seem so willing to believe. Katie's father was killed years ago and since then it's just been her and Lorna. It's Lorna. I am in a relationship with Lorna. I love Lorna, I'm in love with her and as such, the fact that Katie has been taken hurts me almost as much as it hurts her."

"You're what? You? With a woman?" Abi barked out a mirthless laugh. "Yeah right, Mum. And here was I stupidly thinking you might actually be honest with me for once. What else is new with you then? Have you quit the police and taken up growing pot in the basement?"

"You really want to know what's new in my life? OK I'll tell you, I'll tell you everything that has happened in the last month since I last saw you. I suggest you take a seat, it might take a while and it might just open up your mind to the fact that the world, including my world, doesn't centre solely around you." Sam pressed on her daughter's shoulder until the younger blonde slumped into one of the wooden chairs at the kitchen table. Turning away, not sure she could face Abi while she recounted the trials of the past few weeks, Sam began haltingly, "my best friend hid the fact that she had cancer from me. I had to find out in court when she was forced to explain why she had spent so much time at the hospital, to prove she wasn't stalking a nurse there. We were in the middle of investigating the disappearance of a young boy who it turned out had been snatched by an organised group of paedophiles, some of whom are very well connected and powerful. Lorna was instrumental in gathering evidence that led to the raids you might have read about or seen on the news with police officers, singers, actors, politicians being arrested on child pornography charges. We started spending a lot of time together outside of work, discussing the case, and then talking about anything but work. I got to know her and her daughter and the more I saw, the more I realised I liked her. I didn't intend for it to happen, I've never felt this way about any other woman before... hell I've never felt this way about a man either. We're taking it slowly, taking our time getting to know one another and seeing how it goes but I love her, very much. Katie's disappearance has just reinforced how important they both are to me. The thought of Katie being in the hands of the same paedophiles we were investigating makes me sick to my stomach. I'm scared; that Katie won't come back, that this body they found will turn out to be her and that it will destroy Lorna. I'm terrified that I won't be able to help her, that the happiness we've found will be snatched away from us before it has any kind of chance." Sam finally ran out of steam, slumping forward, leaning her forearms against the worktop and resting her head on her clenched hands, deep throaty cries seeping from within her.

For long moments, Abi didn't respond, didn't know how to, her brain struggling to process all the information that had just been thrown at her. Tentatively, she cleared her throat, addressing her mother's slumped form. "So, you're a lesbian now?"

Sam spun violently to face the young woman, eyes flashing dangerously. "Seriously? That's all you have?"

"What else do you want me to say, Mum? I don't know your friend and whilst I'm sure it's rough having cancer, she's the one who has to fight it, not you. Same with this Katie kid, I don't know her, I can't feel sympathy for someone I don't know. You're my mum, imagining you with a woman, it kind of changes things for me. I'm sorry if that disappoints you but I thought I was getting to know you better but you keep so much of yourself shut off from me that when you throw things like this out, it just reminds me that I don't actually know you at all." Abi rose from the table, steadfastly avoiding Sam's incendiary stare. "I need some time to get my head round this. I'm going to bed, I'll see you in the morning. Try and get some sleep, you look like you could use it." With a troubled expression, the young blonde fled from the kitchen and stalked up the stairs towards the bedroom she used as her own whenever she stayed.

Sam sank into the chair Abi had vacated, her legs too weak to carry her any further. Her heart trembled and fresh tears escaped from her eyes as she added a new fear to the list; losing her daughter and grandson for good.

Lorna awoke lying in the middle of her double bed, still clothed in what she had worn the day before. Her limbs were cold and stiff from spending the night uncovered. Rolling onto her back and straightening out took some effort and she opted to give herself a moment before attempting further motion.

"Lorna, are you awake?" Moira's voice called softly through the door.

"Yeah… I think so," Lorna groaned quietly, her own tone still gravelly with sleep.

"DI Manson and DC Dasari are downstairs to speak to you. I'll tell them you'll be down in a few minutes shall I?" Moira asked, leaning around the doorjamb and peering at her sister through the gloom of the bedroom.

Lorna, however, had other ideas, springing off the bed and heading towards Moira with determined strides, only slowing down as the blood rushed to her lower extremities leaving her lightheaded. Her sister steadied her until she was sure the woman could stand unaided. "Did they say if the results are back yet? I should call Sam, she'd want to be here but I don't want to intrude on her time with Abi." The Scot looked genuinely torn between doing what she desperately wanted to and what she deemed polite.

"You go freshen up a little in the bathroom, I'll call Sam and see if she can spare a few minutes to come over then we can all sit down together and see what the latest is," Moira suggested, taking the lead. Her sister attempted to manoeuvre herself towards the stairs still. "Trust me Lorna, you're going to thank me for suggesting you wash your face, brush your hair and put some new clothes on. Come on, otherwise Sam will have my guts for garters when she gets here, she'll think I've been letting you neglect yourself."

"Fine but I'll just be a couple of minutes," Lorna conceded, heading back into the bedroom to collect a change of clothing.

The jarring sound of the phone ringing startled Sam out of her sleep. Her back and neck screamed in agony as she gingerly rose from where she had been slumped over the kitchen table, never having made it up the stairs or even back into the lounge. An empty bottle of wine stood before her, testament to the anaesthetic she had chosen in order to get at least a couple of hours rest following her clash with Abi. With a groan, she staggered the few steps to the phone fixed to the wall beside the kitchen door.

"Hello," she grumbled, still trying to stretch out painful muscles at the same time as fighting to wake her brain up.

"Sam?" Moira's voice sounded tentative, unsure of herself through the crackling line.

"It's me, how's Lorna? Is she ok? Have you heard anything yet?" Sam bombarded the Scottish woman with questions, going from semi-comatose to alert in an instant.

"She's tired, sounds pretty much like you do right now in fact. Listen, Sam, I know it's an imposition given that your daughter is with you but DI Manson and DC Dasari are here to speak to Lorna and we were wondering if you'd come over to hear what they have to say too? If you can't, if you need to be there, please don't feel obliged to drop everything but…" Further words were cut off by Sam's hurried tones.

"I'm on my way over." The blonde DI rapidly thanked her lover's sister and assured her that Abi would be fine without her for a while. Sam raced up the stairs with more energy than she knew she possessed at that moment, flinging her wardrobe doors open and grabbing the first pair of black trousers she could find, pairing it with a baby blue blouse and a cream-coloured woollen tank-top. She ran her hands through her short hair, arranging it into some semblance of a style and refreshed her make-up after cleansing her face with one of the wipes she kept to hand on her dressing table. With a squirt of deodorant, she bolted back down the stairs, skidding to a halt as she saw Abi standing in front of the door.

"Going somewhere?"

"The police are at Lorna's. I need to get over there, they might have news, they might have identified the body. Abi, whatever else you think of what I told you last night, please accept that I love you but I need to get to Lorna right now. I can't leave her to hear that kind of news without me there. She'd think I don't care whether Katie is alive or not." Abi surprised any further words from Sam as she reached out and gripped her in a crushing hug.

"I'm not going to stop you, Mum, just promise me you'll call later and let me know if everything's ok? I'm not going to pretend I understand but I can see how much you care about what's happening with her. Maybe, once Katie's… well once you know if Katie's ok or not, maybe Lorna and hopefully Katie too could come over for dinner with us all? I think I need to meet her before I can really get my head around you being with her."

"I want that, I want you to get to know Lorna, I want all of us to be part of a family together. I'll call you in a little while, as soon as I know anything definite. I'm due on shift this afternoon so I might not be home until late tonight, depends on what happens." Briefly returning the hug, Sam flew out of the door, clambering into her car and speeding off, praying that she wasn't over the limit after the wine she'd drunk into the early hours of the morning.

Jo replaced the receiver, head drooping forwards and her shoulders slouching forward under an unseen weight.

"What's the matter, sweetheart? Who was that?" Lucy rubbed a hand between the older woman's shoulder blades comfortingly.

"Saira's husband. She's not doing too well, they've had to move her to a hospice, he can't cope with looking after her at home any longer. He was wondering if I'd go and visit her." Jo turned around and carefully wrapped her arms around the slightly shorter woman, hiding her face in Lucy's neck.

"How do you feel about that? If you want to go, I can take you there. I know you and she hit it off while you were in hospital."

"We did and we've kept in touch since; phone calls, texts, you know, the usual. I thought she'd gone quiet but then I got distracted and didn't really think anything more of it," Jo murmured against her lover's skin, reluctant to raise her head from its comforting position.

"She won't blame you for getting caught up in your own fight, honey, so you mustn't either," Lucy assured, hands running over Jo's broad back.

"I want to see her. She was so good to me, helped me so much through those first chemo sessions. But I'm scared, Luce. What if… I mean… that might be me in a few months or a couple of years. I'm scared that it'll be like looking into my own future."

"You can't think like that, love. You're going to beat this, you're going to get better and you're going to go on to live a full, long life," Lucy insisted, pulling Jo's head from her shoulder and cradling her cheeks between two warm palms.

"That's what Saira thought too… the first time she was fighting this fight. But then it came back and now it looks like it's winning. Is there really any point or am I just delaying the inevitable? Wouldn't it be better to spare us all the agony and let it take me now?" Jo asked tiredly.

"No! Jo, I will take any time I have with you, whether that's ten hours, ten days, ten months or ten years plus at any price. There are no guarantees it won't come back but the odds are vastly in your favour of a full and complete recovery. No one will force you to go and visit Saira if you think you can't face it but please, sweetheart, don't think that her situation is a template for your own. There are so many variables that no two cases are really alike." Lucy looked intently into her girlfriend's blue-brown eyes, imploring her to believe in her own powers of recovery.

"I think going to see Saira is the least I can do really. She must feel pretty desolate in there – it's not exactly a well hidden secret that people go into those places for palliative care and don't tend to come out again except in a pine box. Would you mind running me up there this afternoon if I check and see what time visiting hours are?" Jo asked dipping her gaze almost shyly, before raising it again and offering the young brunette a tiny grateful smile. "Thank you for reminding me why the fight's worthwhile and calling me on my crap. Honestly, without you, I'd have given up as soon as I found the lump. So don't you ever feel like your support isn't enough for me because you are the reason I get out of bed in a morning. I love you, Lucy."

Sam allowed herself to be guided through into the lounge by Moira. "Neil, Grace," she acknowledged with a swift nod before looking to where her lover sat on the couch.

"It's not Katie… the body they found, it's not Katie," Lorna supplied as a single relieved tear trickled over her ruddy cheek.