CHAPTER TWO

DON'T CRY

The walk home was longer than Lucy wanted it to be, and she couldn't blame anyone but herself for dragging her feet along the cobblestone road. It was like she was prolonging the inevitable long, restless night she was going to have. She couldn't forget what happened, the memory was engraved in her brain. The bloody, bubbling skin. Natsu's heavy, lifeless body. Grays harsh words. Erza's indifference. It was a permanent stake in her mind that she keeps brushing over on repeat.

Don't cry.

Lucy's mind came to a halt when she realized she was in front of her apartment door. Her arms felt heavy as she felt around her skirt pockets for her key. Her hands shook in her attempt to unlock the door. She almost threw the key on her third attempt, but managed to keep her anger in check long enough to turn the key, shuffle inside, and close the door behind her. The sound of wet clothes dripping puddles onto the wood floor beneath her seemed louder than the heavy rain outside. She peered down at the dark reflection of her beaten face against the puddle. Her skin looked raw and irritated, which she assumed had to do with the magic that guy had used on her. Watching herself in the shallow water, she raised her fingers to brush against her tender skin. The touch burned about as bad as a razor burn. It was manageable.

Don't cry.

Lucy tore her eyes from her disheveled appearance, stubbornly holding stinging tears behind her eyes. She didn't deserve to cry for herself, when she was the reason Natsu was lying in a hospital bed. She didn't bother with the lights as she made her way through her empty apartment. The silence was a comforting change. The yelling and fighting between her and Gray was getting tiring.

Don't cry.

The Celestial Spirit mage made it to her kitchen in a daze. She was bound to be dehydrated by now, and as much as she wanted to hide under her covers and pretend the past 24 hours never happened, she needed to take care of herself. Her kitchen was exactly how she left it a few days ago, clean and organized with a vase of slowly decaying lilies she'd bought to cheer herself up a week ago. She prided herself on having a tidy home, always picking up after herself and Natsu when he would show up uninvited to eat her food and ruin her floors.

Don't. Cry.

Her body didn't exactly want to cooperate with her. With shaky arms and legs, she felt like she could barely support herself, "You're fine Lucy," She murmured to herself in mild annoyance, "You walked all the way here, you can get yourself a drink of water too."

The blonde dragged herself across the kitchen towards the corner counter. After wiping her wet hands on the dry cloth beside her sink, she opened a cupboard to grab one of her glass cups. Her fingers wobbled around the glass, but she got a firm grip on it before removing it and closing the cupboard door again. She slowly made her way to the fridge dispenser and carefully filled her cup up halfway with water.

As she took her cup from the fridge and put the glass to her lips, she tried to piece together this feeling she was having. Where as before she felt scared and anxious, now she feels almost… numb. There was sorrow and despair floating around her mind, and that heavyweight was back on her chest. It felt like it was crushing her, leaving her with a small radius of breathing room left.

She imagined Natsu again, with his smiling face and happy laugh squeezing her heart just a bit more. His spiky pink locks of hair twirling in the air as he jumped on her bedroom window turned a few shades darker. His soft, friendly eyes become cold and empty. He was the pride of Fairy Tail that was stripped down to another limp body on a battlefield. And of all the people to bring him to that point, it had to be her.

It took her falling to the floor and hitting her head against her kitchen counter to realize she'd dropped her glass cup. The shattered glass cut long jagged lines up her legs, but she could hardly feel the stinging that was most certainly there. There was a pounding in her head that she couldn't tell was from just hitting her head or a combination of that and the tears that were now falling down her face in waves. Her emotions were welling up inside her and the crushing feeling on her chest was heavier than before. She felt constricted and cornered, and her skin burned.

Her breath came out in short pants that only got shorter as seconds passed. Her skin was crawling with the feeling of the light poisoning her skin again, inching its way further into her body. She fiddled with her fingers if only to assure herself she could still move them. She pushed her shaking hands into her hair, pulling at the wet strands with sweaty fingers. Her eyes moved frantically across the floor with scattered pieces of glass mixed with water and a small amount of her own blood.

But her blood turned into Natsu's blood, and she wasn't in her kitchen anymore. She was sobbing over her friends dead body, begging him to wake up, to come back. She was clawing her skin to get the light out of her body. She was struggling to reach her keys so Natsu doesn't have to save her anymore. She was screaming at the dark wizard who destroyed her world and made her family realize how worthless she really was.

Lucy was a sobbing mess on her kitchen floor, both unaware and uncaring of her surroundings. The only sounds in the small unit coming from her cries and labored breathing. The only light coming from the occasional burst of lightning through her window. Her toes curled inwards as she fought the onslaught of tears waving down her face.

She wasn't supposed to cry.

A few feet away from her, a pale yellow light appeared, making her flinch back in surprise. The glow was supposed to be comforting and familiar, but it elicited a complete opposite reaction from the Celestial Mage. She was choking on terror and recoiling as far back into the wooden cabinets she leaned on because oh god the light's back.

She didn't process that the light wasn't black, nor that it wasn't surrounding her with it's suffocating paralysis. The figure that emerged from the light did nothing to ease her horror, but rather she didn't even seem to notice it. She was lost to her mind once again as Loke looked down at his wizard with concern written all over his face.

The Lion spirit, along with the other spirits contracted to Lucy Heartfilia, were well aware of the situation the blonde found herself in. Against his better judgement, he had agreed to Aquarius's request to let Lucy handle her problems herself. She was an adult after all and he had no right to insert himself into her personal issues. If Aquarius thought it would be better to leave Lucy to make her own decisions, he would respect it. She would call them to her aid if she so needed them.

And he did just that, never appearing during the feud between her and Gray or during the terribly quiet train ride. It was extremely difficult for him, as it was for the other spirits, to sit still during the communion back at Fairy Tail. All of Lucy's spirits were torn apart at the sadness emanating through their connection with their wizard. They felt her agony and mental torment during the exchange with the guild. But no one stepped foot into the human world regardless of how tense Loke felt or how guilty Aquarius looked. He knew she was right, him suddenly interjecting into the situation would only make things worse for Lucy.

However when she was here, alone and breaking down in her apartment, he couldn't sit back and watch. He wasn't here as a spirit to serve her, he was here as a friend to help her. And by the Celestial God was he going to do just that.

He hadn't thought about the light he would produce by passing through to the human world, but he felt rather stupid for not considering to appear in a different room after seeing the effect it had on Lucy. Guilt instantly struck him, but he chose to push that to the side to deal with another time. He needed his full attention ahead of him.

Loke kneeled down in front of Lucy, keeping his movements slow and steady to avoid spooking her more than he already had. She wasn't looking at him but rather through him, most likely imagining something completely different to the scene in front of her. He was afraid to touch her in worry it may startle her. He was tempted to leave her be until she became more aware of her surroundings before approaching on her personal space. He knew touch during a panic episode could lead to a worse experience if the other party wasn't ready for it. As much as he wanted to let her calm down before touching her, he knew her injuries needed to be treated immediately.

Out of all of the damage she'd sustained, the most worrisome were the cuts on her legs. The red and swollen skin was definitely a close second since he still had no idea what type of magic caused it. The small scrapes and bruises weren't ideal but they also weren't detrimental. He wasn't sure about how hard she hit her head or if he should be worried about a possible concussion, but her grasping at her hair probably wasn't helping. He was reluctant to immediately work on her battered wounds with her mind fighting an internal battle of its own, but given the situation he needed to try to speed up the process.

He raised his hand, letting it hover over her head in hopes of some type of sign of recognition to flash across her eyes. When she remained focused on the wooden floor, he gently let his hand rest on top of one of Lucy's. She jumped at the unexpected contact with an unsteady breathe. Loke stayed still, letting her get used to the feeling of his hand on hers. Her eyes darted back and forth as if anticipating an attack that would never come.

Loke waited with bated breath for her to either lash out at him or sink further into the nightmare she was experiencing, but nothing came. She remained still, panting short breaths and awaiting the next move. Slowly he rubbed his thumb along her clenched fist, coaxing her fingers out of the death grip it had on her hair. Her hand remained tense below his as he gently kneaded her bruised knuckles, bringing the rest of his fingers to assist him.

A few moments passed before the blondes hand began to relax. He brought his other hand to begin the same process on the second hand inside her hair, slowly rubbing at her clenched fists. He felt his lips curve slightly when her eyes started to flicker with awareness . She blinked away a few tears, shaking away the cloudiness in her vision as a black suit appeared in front of her.

Her brown eyes met his and the recognition he had been hoping for was finally there. She was sad, scared, and hurt, but she wasn't lost in her mind anymore and that was still progress to him. He couldn't keep himself from smiling down at the blonde who looked a mix of surprised and confused. Loke kept his hands firmly over hers as her fingers released their hold on her scalp.

"Hey," He said with a friendly smile, quite plain compared to his usual greetings.

"Loke?" Her voice came out slightly hoarse, "What are you doing here?"

The spirit removed his hands from hers, letting her place her own in her lap. He stood himself up, taking in the now messy kitchen. He never thought he'd be secluded to clean up duty, but he wasn't entirely upset with the thought of helping Lucy clean up. Especially when her mind was in such shambles, "I'm here to help, but don't worry too much about that. Where's your first aid kit?"

Lucy started at her spirit with a mix of awe and bewilderment, she couldn't get her head wrapped around why he was here. She didn't deserve his help, nor did she deserve the concern glazed over his eyes. As much as she wanted his help, she couldn't justify it. She couldn't bring herself to accept this, to accept him taking care of her. Not after what she'd done.

"Loke, it's okay," She muttered, trying and failing to sound more like herself, "You don't have to do this."

Loke paused his scan of the kitchen in search of the first aid kit to study her, his worry multiplied with the grim feeling in his heart that had to be coming from the mage in front of him. He knew she was suffering from guilt and shame, but to feel this way when her spirits reach out a hand was heartbreaking. She shouldn't be blaming herself so much.

"I know I don't," His hands fiddled with the buttons on his dress jacket sleeve, "but I want to."

If Lucy could feel any more guilty than she already was, then she was feeling it ten times over at the thought of her spirit helping her. She felt it coil around her stomach making her feel queasy because she didn't deserve this.

You did this to yourself.

This was your fault.

Why are you still here?

"Lucy?" Loke's voice interrupted her train of thought.

He had completely abandoned his search for the first aid kit in favor of kneeling in front of Lucy again. He looked scared, and that only made her feel worse. She couldn't do this to him, she was hurting him. He deserved better. He didn't deserve her for a master, she was too weak to hold such powerful keys. There were far more skilled wizards who could give them a better life than she could provide.

"Whatever you're thinking, stop it now," Loke's stern voice echoed in her brain, freezing her train of thought.

She blinked away her insecurities to bring her attention back on the spirit in front of her, "How do you know what I'm thinking?" She asked slightly paranoid he could hear her inner thoughts.

He pointed to his chest, sadness looming in his features, "We're connected through a special bond. It's not that I can hear your thoughts, it's that I can feel your emotions."

Lucy felt heat rise into her cheeks and averted her gaze away from the man before her. He chuckled at her embarrassment, "Don't worry Lucy, we can only really feel your strongest emotions."

She felt a little relieved at that knowledge, but now she was running through everything she may have felt in her lifetime that her spirits never told her about. If they knew everything she figured they might she would rather die than face any of them again.

That might be a bit dramatic, even for her, but she felt she earned herself a moment to be a little less… Depressed.

With a sigh, Lucy prepared to push herself up until a sturdy hand stopped her, "What do you think you're doing?"

The blonde's irritated gaze met an amused one, "I'm getting up to clean this mess," for emphasis, she gestured around to the pile of glass and water.

Loke would be lying if he said he wasn't surprised at how quickly Lucy bounced back to her normal self. But this version of Lucy seemed fake, like it was a mask to protect herself. He forced himself to not feel hurt at the underlying distrust. After all, she had been screamed at and berated by someone she considered close to her just an hour ago. It wasn't exactly strange for her to be wary of any and everyone.

That just meant he needed to try harder to prove to her that she could trust him again,"No you're not," He gently pushed her back into a sitting position, "I'll do it."

Lucy stubbornly shook her head as Loke made his way around the kitchen in search of a broom, "No, I'm not letting you do all of this."

Loke opened her pantry and internally cheered at having found the broom so fast,"You can't exactly stop me."

Loke closed the closet and returned to Lucy's side with the object in grasp. The blonde crossed her arms defiantly, "I can close your gate."

Loke smirked, "Good luck trying, I'm here by my own magic," he began sweeping up the broken glass into the corner of the room, "And you don't have nearly enough magic energy to force my gate closed."

"What?" She asked in disbelief, she knew she was low on magic energy but so much so that she couldn't close Loke's gate?

What had that wizard done to her?

"Either way," She shook off her momentary distress, "This is my mess to handle. Not yours," She stood up on wobbly legs, causing Loke to drop the broom and instantly put out his hands around her incase she suddenly fell to the ground. His palm made contact with her arm just in time for her legs to give out on her. He managed to grab her in time before she cut up her legs worse than they already were, and carefully lowered her down to the ground once again.

Lucy was frozen in shock for a moment with a frantic Loke waving his hands in front of her face. When she regained her focus to see the by now familiar concern yet again, she realized she may not be physically able to do anything without help.

"Please Lucy," He begged, "Just let me help you."

His grip on her arms tightened, leaving her irritated skin with a dull tingling pain. He looked terrified and desperate, and she knew she put that there. She was the reason he was feeling this way, and it made her feel awful. She hated seeing sad faces on the people she cared about.

She knew she realistically couldn't do anything without Loke's help, and it would probably ease his mind if she let him. Her fight was dying, and she came face to face with just how exhausted she was. How did she even walk home without collapsing? She hadn't slept in over 24 hours, had a limited amount of food and water, and was mental distraught for who knows how long. It's a miracle she'd had enough in her to defy Loke's help in the first place.

Loke's fingers lightly tapped against her skin, hoping to hear some type of answer from the blonde. Lucy's eyelids felt heavy from exhaustion and tears as she turned to her spirit, giving him a soft nod. He instantly relaxed, dropped his hands to his side and breathed out a sigh of relief, "Thank you."

He raised from his position on the ground, noticing that most of the glass was now in the corner of the kitchen. He figured now that he got Lucy to cooperate, he could really try to fix up her cuts on her leg.

"Hey Lucy," He asked as he searched through her cupboards, receiving a barely audible hum in response, "Can you tell me where you're first aid kit is now?"

Lucy nodded and responded with a quiet voice, "Under the bathroom sink."

Loke made the quick walk to the bathroom and found the box easily. When he returned to the kitchen, Lucy was sleeping soundly against the cabinets. The lion spirit wasn't surprised in the slightest that she had fallen asleep so easily. He was, however, worried if him bandaging her wounds would wake her up. He wasn't exactly nimble in his fingers, and he'd never really gotten injured enough in the human world to have to bandage himself up, even during his three year banishment. He always had the option of returning to the spirit realm to heal himself. His knowledge in human injuries was subpar at best.

"Would Leo like assistance?"

Loke jumped at the feminine voice behind him, whirling around to reveal Virgo holding a pile of fabric. He let his tense shoulders drop and let out a groan, "Damn Virgo, make a noise or something so I know you're there."

The pink haired girl peered around her mass with a straight face, still awaiting a response to her question, "I apologize, I thought I shouldn't disturb Princess and appeared in another room."

Loke felt his face heat up, "Well at least one of us had the common sense to do that…"

"Would Leo like assistance?"

"Actually," Loke put the medical supplies to the side, "If you wouldn't mind helping me take care of these cuts on Lucy's legs, I'd appreciate it."

Virgo nodded, setting the pile to the side and settling herself where Loke was. She instantly began cleaning the cuts and applying disinfectant. During all of which Lucy hadn't stirred awake once. Loke took the chance to finish cleaning up the glass and began mopping up the rain water mixed with Lucy's blood.

"Princess must be tired," Virgo noted as she prepared the bandages to wrap around Lucy's legs.

Loke made a noise of agreement, "Yeah, she's been through the wringer recently."

"Aquarius may not say it," Virgo wrapped the first bandage, "But she is rather anxious."

Loke grimaced at the thought of the water spirit, "I can bet she's probably not too happy with me for coming here without Lucy summoning me."

Virgo remained silent for a moment, finishing the first wrap before answering, "No one blames you, Leo. We all wanted to do the same, even Aquarius. But I believe you were the best choice out of all of us."

Loke didn't respond, but instead smiled to himself. He may not have been supposed to come out here on his own, but he didn't regret it. Knowing all of Lucy's spirits wanted to do the same warmed his heart. He just wished Lucy could feel it too.

"Princess is bandaged and ready for bed," Virgo announced as she approached her pile of fabric.

Loke put aside the mop after one last wipe across the no clean floor, "Thanks Virgo. I appreciate it."

Virgo picked through the fabric pile, searching for something in particular. Curiosity peaked in Loke's head as he stepped towards the pink haired spirit," Hey, what is all of that anyways?"

Virgo grabbed hold of whatever she was looking for and jumped into a standing position. She turned to Loke holding a set of clothes Virgo had picked out from the celestial world. It looked like any ordinary set of pajamas but considering he literally wore an old t shirt and shorts to bed, he shouldn't be judging.

"Pajamas?" Loke questioned.

"Yes, Aries and I picked them out just for Princess," She concluded before walking towards Lucy.

Realization didn't hit Loke as to what was about to happen until Virgos began pushing up Lucy's top, "Woah Virgo! Not here!"

Virgo halted her movements and turned towards him with confusion, "Where else should I change her? She cannot do it herself."

Loke shook his head at how dense she could be at times, but pushed it aside. He settled Lucy into his arms and swiftly made his way to her bedroom. He laid her down on her bed and turned to Virgo, "You can change her here, I'll wait outside."

"Of course, Leo."

He made his leave of the room, shutting the door behind him. He felt a sense of accomplishment that he was able to successfully pull Lucy out of her breakdown, but deep down he knew this was just the beginning. There were mental scars that had long since healed that have been ripped open again. She was hurting and scared and as much as he wanted to believe her spirits being there for her was enough, he knew he was only lying to comfort himself.

She needed the root of the problem there to help her. She needed Fairy Tail to heal her broken spirit. But much like how she refused his help, he wasn't sure if she was willing to let them try.

To say the Fairy Tail guild looked depressed was an understatement. Gloom and sorrow lingered in every corner of the guild hall. Most of the occupants hung their heads over their half empty cups of alcohol and the sober members found themselves poking at uneaten food or picking at the wooden tables in silence. Even the most cheerful couldn't muster up the courage to put a smile on their face.

Natsu's injury and the obvious rift in his team was still so fresh in everyone's mind. The heart of the guild was crushed and missing, causing the whole dynamic of Fairy Tail to take a hit. Much to the dismay of the guild, Master Makarov had instructed everyone to let Lucy have some time alone to process her feelings. Levy in particular had a hard time following his orders, but thanks to Gajeel's strategic distractions, she remained busy at the guild working through a few barrier spell books Freed had lent her.

When Team Natsu had first arrived at the guild, no one knew how to react to a seemingly lifeless Dragon Slayer and furious Gray Fullbuster. It wasn't until Gray had recounted the tale that everyone's mind began to wander. As much as Gray harped on Lucy for her failures, there was an underlying sense of confusion. Why was he taking his anger out on Lucy when she appeared to be just as saddened as the rest of them? The heartbreak and sorrow plaguing her aura was overwhelming to anyone near her; there was no way she was handling things well. There wasn't a single soul in the guild who didn't want to check on Lucy, except maybe one particular Ice Mage who was having a hard time understanding the harsh scowls he was receiving.

Looking back on his actions, Gray knew he was a little harsh towards Lucy. It was hard not to realize it when everyone in the guild was rubbing it in his face. He knew he probably fucked up, but how else was he supposed to get the fact that Natsu could have died to stick in her head? He wouldn't be able to live with himself if anyone in his team met their demise and he couldn't prevent it. But when Lucy was right there, just a foot away from him, and Natsu still got hit… He doesn't even want to think about what could have happened if Wendy hadn't been there.

He might be attending a funeral instead of visiting a hospital bed.

Gray hadn't left the guild since they arrived back from the mission, choosing to reside alone in the corner. He refused to go back to his house to shower and sleep, instead choosing to use the guilds own amenities to take care of his basic needs. He didn't know what type of magic was used on Natsu and until he could see the dragon slayer up and walking again, he wouldn't relax.

No one tried to start up a conversation with Gray, except occasionally Juvia who was growing nervous by his lack of response. The rest seemed to be avoiding him in either fear or anger. He couldn't bring himself to care. If this was what he got for trying to make Lucy understand her massive mistake, then he'll deal with it.

The Ice Mage had been on a benched table against the corner for the past few hours as Mira, Erza, Wendy, and Master Makarov had been tending to Natsu. Gray had been denied to see his friend because of his "emotional state". He considered it a load of crap, but eventually retreated to the corner awaiting news.

When the sound of the infirmary door opening broke through the quiet guild hall, all heads turned towards the group exiting the room. Erza and Makarov looked as stoic as ever, but the small smiles on Mira and Wendy's face made the clenching in his chest calm.

He has to be okay.

"We have some news regarding Natsu," Erza's loud voice contrasted greatly with the empty sound around them, "His magic energy has taken a substantial hit. We have a theory it has something to do with the mage who attacked him."

Erza let her gaze cross all the members, letting herself linger on Gray a little longer than the rest, "That mixed with the energy used to heal him was enough to knock him unconscious for at least the coming week to regain his magic energy. Once he has fully regained his power, he will be as good as new."

The guild collectively cheered in relief, the mood suddenly flipping with a sense of calm washing over everyone. Most of the members began to celebrate the news with refilled cups of alcohol and loud dancing and singing, which were all common in the Fairy Tail Guild.

There were a few mages who still seemed reluctant to celebrate so quickly. Levy looked troubled as she bickered quietly with Gajeel, her barrier spell book forgotten beside her. The two looked to be arguing about something that Levy was currently winning. After a few more agitated hand gestures and a groan or two from the Iron Dragon Slayer, he let out a harsh exhale before pushing himself up with a determined small girl beside him.

Both of them approached Master Makarov and the group of mages that had tended to Natsu, letting soft whispers flitter between them. After a few seconds, Levy visibly deflated with a sad nod and returned to her chair with clear disappointment littering her features. Gajeel returned to her side with Pantherlily trying his best to distract the girl.

After hearing Natsu's fate, Gray still felt weary about leaving him alone without physically seeing him walking and speaking like normal. It felt childish but he needed the reassurance that Natsu wasn't teetering on the edge of death. He was sure that for the next week, Gray's mind wouldn't rest.

"I see you chose to sit alone."

Erza's large armor clinked together as she took a seat in front of the ice mage. Her tone wasn't dripping with hatred as some of the other guild members, but it also wasn't warm or soothing by any means.

"'Chose' is a strong word," he replied bitterly, leaning himself backwards on the bench with his arms crossed over his chest.

Erza has always been a strong woman. Her resolve never wavered and she was a fierce opponent in battle, but above all she was a protector to her guild. Whether it be enemies attacking her home or simple quarrels between members, she held order and stood as a pillar of support and defense. This especially rang true when she would put herself in between Gray and Natsu's bickering. She would protect any one of her guild mates, even against one of their own.

"I'm guessing the guild is giving you the cold shoulder," she responded coldly, giving the rest of the members a once over before bringing her attention back on the man in front of her

Gray huffed in reply, "That's putting it lightly."

There was an uncomfortable silence between the two as Gray glared across the guild hall at a group of cheering drunk wizards. Erza contemplated her words carefully before starting her next line of questioning, letting her voice stand strong against her shaking fist, "How do you think Lucy felt?

The ice mage dropped his glare to give Erza a confused look, "About Natsu? I mean she's probably upset but-"

"No," Erza interrupted, "About how her teammate belittled her in front of her family for something she couldn't control."

Gray's wide eyes met Erza's stern glare, "Seriously? You too?"

Erza crossed her own own arms in a mockery of his, "Do you not think you crossed a line?"

Gray leaned himself over the table he resided at, letting his frustration shine through his words, "I think my friend was almost killed because Lucy wasn't paying attention," He jabbed his index finger in the wooden table below him as he expressed his irritation, "She shouldn't always need Natsu to save her ass!"

Erza roughly grabbed Gray's hand, letting her own emotions she had been repressing for the sake of rekindling some sort of bond between Gray and Lucy without ruining their team show in her tense grip. Gray was surprised when he was yanked closer to the red head with a force that warned him to shut up, unless he'd rather be squashed in a wall crevice for someone to find later.

"Gray, I don't think you understand the consequences of your actions," She seethed as she forced him close enough to feel her breathe beat against his skin, "Your anger has caused a divide in our team that I'm not sure can ever be fixed! In hard times we stick together, not attack each other!"

Erza dropped him back against the wall with a thud. As he rubbed his sore arm and she took even breaths to calm her own nerves, another body approached the table, "Gray, Erza, you both should follow me. Let's have a discussion."

Both Gray and Erza dropped their sight on the smaller guild master who wore a tired expression. After Erza's outburst, Gray had a feeling he knew what was to come from a conversation with the master. He wasn't sure if he didn't deserve to be yelled at for his actions, he also wasn't sure if he regretted speaking to Lucy the way he did. If he hadn't put his foot down, this could lead to a repeat incident. Someone needed to tell Lucy that she needed to work harder, and he just happened to take on that responsibility.

The walk to the master's office wasn't nearly as awful as it could have been had the entire guild not been partying enough to notice. No one took a second glance at the three as they made their way to the third floor and into the small room. Makarov motioned for Gray and Erza to sit on the arm chairs provided as he sat himself atop the large desk littered with various papers and books.

Makarov had dealt with a lot in his life. Rambunctious kids, fighting adults, expensive damage repairs, attacks from enemy guilds, hell even the magic council's had it out for him. He's seen about everything under the sun, including his own guild being torn apart from the inside out. He'd witnessed that himself when Laxus had hit the peak of his rebellious stage. He's seen it before and he'll do everything he can to prevent it from happening again.

The master cleared his throat before he began, "Erza, I understand your concern for Lucy, but she will be alright. Do not let your worry consume you."

The requip mage solemnly nodded, forcibly relaxing her tense shoulders, "Yes master, I apologize for causing a scene."

Makarov turned to Gray, "Gray, I hope you can understand that your words tonight have caused a great deal of pain to Lucy and the rest of the guild."

Gray straightened his body defensively, "If my words hurt then so be it, it needed to be said."

"Enough of that," Makarov snapped back, letting frustration leak into his voice causing Gray to flinch backward in surprise, "There was no need for such a public display of betrayal."

"Betrayal?" As much as Gray had been on Lucy's case for the situation, he wouldn't classify his actions as betrayal, "I didn't betray anyone."

"You turned your back on your family, is that not the epitome of a betrayal?" The older wizard surveyed the ice mage before him, taking in his defensive stance.

"I mean I guess," Gray paused, giving Erza's stern eyes a glance, "but I didn't betray Lucy. I only said what I said so that she'll get better. So this doesn't happen again."

"There is a time and a place, my boy," Makarov sighed with a hand rubbing against his heavy eyes, "If that was a conversation you so desperately needed to have with Lucy, you should have handled it better."

"Also," Makarov continued with a slight smirk, "Don't you forget the amount of times you nearly got yourself or your teammates killed yourself. Don't ridicule what you have also done."

"That's different!" Gray jumped to his defense, his fingers curling around the chair arms as he leaned himself towards Makarov.

"Is it though?" Makarov narrowed his eyes at the younger wizard, "Everyone has made mistakes in life, including not being able to predict a move that nearly killed someone. Take the battle against the Oracion Seis for example, had Natsu been killed by Zero and you survived," The Master pointed to Gray, "would you have been blamed for his death? Or would we blame the vicious dark wizard who took his life with his own hands?"

Gray sighed, tilting his head in defeat. As if magic itself had healed the room of the toxic anger, all the frustration Gray had been feeling previously disintegrated. In its place stood a heavy weight of regret and understanding; though far too late for Makarov's liking but better than nothing. Gray hung his head, feeling something similar to what Lucy must have been feeling before, like he was a disappointment for ever accusing her of being the cause for Natsu's injury. What kind of teammate was he to blame Lucy for something she couldn't control?

"I'm sorry," Gray whispered, refusing to let any tears rise, whether they were guilty tears or not didn't matter, "I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I… I should have kept a level head. I just…" He trailed off, letting out a sniffle before picking back up his abandoned sentence, "He had no pulse when I showed up."

Erza whipped her head to face him with fear lacing her voice, "What?

The ice mage shrunk in on himself, refusing to make eye contact, "I thought he was already gone and took it out on Lucy. I guess he was actually still alive and she already knew," Gray rose his head to finally face the two in front of him, " I was just… scared, alright?"

Makarov hummed at the news with a creased brow, expecting nothing less than a theatrical story from Fairy Tail's strongest team, "It's understandable why you were upset and scared, but I can assure you both that Natsu is still alive and well," both Erza and Gray took comfort in his words, letting their minds unwind from their wild thoughts, "As I said before, you can't place blame on anyone for the actions of a dark guild except for the dark wizards themselves. Natsu is a strong and powerful mage who can handle attacks strong enough to wipe out our entire city. If something took out Natsu, chances are he was taken off guard. It's the fault of no one for the trickery of another."

Erza gave a sound of agreement as Gray stayed silent, seemingly mulling over the situation in his head. His guilt was eating him alive and all he could think about was how disgusting it felt. The feeling only multiplied when he realized Lucy had been experiencing this for the past 24 hours and all he did was beat her down more. He wasn't the only one who had almost lost a friend, she had witnessed it herself and had to deal with him blaming her for it. What kind of friend was he to turn his back on her when she was hurting?

"Oh my god," Gray groaned as he cradled his head in his hands, "I should go apologize. I was being an ass."

Makarov and Erza shared a smile together before the guild master spoke, "I'm glad you feel remorse, but I'm afraid I can't let you see her."

Gray shot up in his seat with creases lining his forehead, "Why not?"

"Give her the day to recoup Gray," Erza chimed in softly, "She's had a rough night."

Makarov nodded in agreement, "I have warned everyone in the guild they are not permitted to visit her," Makarov hesitated before adding with a sadness in his voice, "She probably wouldn't be too excited to see anyone so soon anyways."

Gray groaned and reluctantly found himself hunched over in his chair once again,"I'm guessing that's what Levy and Gajeel came to talk to you about?"

Makarov chuckled, "Ah Levy, she's just worried is all. Those two girls are close friends indeed."

"About Lucy's strength," Erza cut in earning herself a subtle look of encouragement from the master, "She is already a remarkably strong Celestial mage, the strongest I've ever met. However I can offer to train her in close combat and stealth to better aid her when her spirits cannot," Erza rubbed at her temple for a moment in thought, "Although, I've seen her handle a whip proficiently in close combat before. She's rather skilled."

"Indeed," Makarov agreed, "I don't think this is really a matter of Lucy not being strong enough. It's more a matter of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. From what I've been told," Makarov's soft persona was replaced with something that resembled more of a scolding parent, "A large part of what transpired was due to being unprepared for outside parties, such as the five wizards Lucy faced."

"Yeah," Gray replied quietly as he scratched his head sheepishly, "We didn't know that a group of em' weren't in the warehouse until I found Lucy and Flame Breath."

"If anything needs to be worked on," Makarov gave a pointed look to Gray, "It's the dynamic and trust of Team Natsu. It has been severely damaged tonight. And if you ever want to work together again," Makarov turned to Erza as well, "you need to fix things with Lucy."

"We understand Master," Erza stood from her seat, prompting Gray to mimic her, "Tomorrow morning we will visit Lucy ourselves."

"Yeah," Gray coughed awkwardly, the guilt still eating at him, "We'll fix this. Er, I'll fix this."

"And on top of that," Makarov hopped off of his desk and sauntered over to the large entrance to his office, "Start preparing for your jobs properly, hm?"

"Aye! Virgo cut that out! You'll wake her up!" Loke never imagined he could yell and whisper at the same time, but even he could surprise himself every now and then.

Virgo had herself seated on the foot of Lucy bed, gently massaging the blonde's bare foot with delicate fingers as Loke attempted to swat her hands away from their task. The other only dodged his attack leaving an annoyed Loke huffing beside the bed, "Virgo," his voice held an inflection that warned her to heed his words, "If you wake her up, I swear to the Celestial God I will send you back to the spirit realm myself and lock you there for a year."

"Princess deserves to be pampered," Virgo paused her soft kneading of Lucy's skin to stare at Loke. Her eyes held emotion that he rarely saw in the girl, something dark and bitter was ambling in her features and he loathed that any of the people he cared about had to harbor such pain, "Leo agrees that Princess has been depressed, yes?"

Loke eyed Virgo skeptically, "Is that a trick question? Of course she's been depressed!" He waved his hand frantically to gesture towards the blonde fast asleep in her bed, "Did you even see her earlier!"

"Then please," Virgo began her massage once more, her face bearing a small smile, "Allow me to calm her tensed muscles until she awakes."

Loke remained planted in his position, giving Virgo an even more accusatory look than before. He looked down right offended that Virgo would continue abusing Lucy's feet, especially with how irritated her skin was. Given the night he had with the maiden spirit, he's surprised he hasn't gone crazy yet. Even so, he couldn't bring himself to stop her from most of her insane activities to keep productive with such a fresh wound placed in all of their hearts, but he was beginning to lose his patience.

"I can return to look out duty if Leo prefers," Virgo stated as if she hadn't just spoken Loke's personal nightmare.

"No. No, no, no thanks Virgo," Loke straightened his posture and smoothed out his wrinkled suit, giving Virgo a look that begged her to stay still, "We don't need a repeat of that."

Yes, seeing a pink haired girl perched on top of a kitchen counter with no concern for self decency as she declared enemies with passersby's on the street would constitute as one of Loke's worst fears that he never wanted to experience again.

Virgo returned to her self proclaimed mission, satisfied that she finally had Loke's blessing to continue. Loke sat himself at Lucy's desk, doing the same thing he had been doing for the past 8 hours: waiting for Lucy to wake up. No, he wasn't a guard dog. He was a Celestial Spirit, The Lion, The Leader of the Zodiac. But like hell was he going to leave Lucy here alone after her break down earlier in the day. The least he could do was make sure she was safe and secure in her home as she slept.

And if that meant he had to deal with Virgo's ridiculous ideas at "protecting" Lucy while keeping herself occupied, then so be it. Although he had to admit, the girl really did admire their master. As did he and the rest of Lucy's spirits.

It's never been a surprise to him how loyal and trusting the rest of Lucy's spirits were to her. She had a special bond with each of them. She treated them all with kindness and respect, and above all she never endangered any of them if she could help it. She was the best celestial spirit wizard, in both strength and character, that Loke had ever encountered in his existence. So it was natural for all of them to relentlessly worry over her as she lay dead asleep in her bed. After the day she had, everyone one of them were feeling the effects of her emotions.

Loke cast a glimpse towards Virgo who had resorted to humming a soft tune as she pushed and pulled on Lucy's red skin. He found himself smiling at her, pleased that she was finding relief and reassurance by being close to Lucy during her time of need. As much as he couldn't stand Virgo's crazy antics, he could sympathize with the helplessness she no doubt was feeling. All of them felt uneasy with a gnawing anxiety filling their minds, hence why he was here in the first place.

By the time Virgo had felt satisfied enough to place Lucy's feet back into her cocoon of blankets, the sun had already begun to set and the rain from early dissipated, leaving only light drops of water on the window and puddles of muddy water on the cobblestone path below. Both spirits fell into a comfortable silence as they watched Lucy's chest rise and fall in a steady beat.

If he was being honest, Loke had no idea what would come next. Whether Lucy went straight to the guild or waited to confront them all again wasn't his biggest concern at the moment. What he intended to bring to Lucy's attention first was the irritating red and blotchy rash that had developed across her body. Since it came from magic, it might have residual effects they aren't aware of. Getting that figured out was his first priority.

But in order to do that, she may have to visit the guild and face everyone again, and he wasn't sure if that was on her to-do list for the next week, let alone the next day.

He didn't have much more time to plan before a shrill, scratchy scream reverberated in the small bedroom. A panicked Lucy shot up in her bed, flailing her arms blindly in her constricting blankets. Her unsteady hands grabbing at her clothing that seemed more like they were drowning her the longer she struggled. Loke jumped into action, pulling the blankets off of her in a swift motion. Once all of the bedding was tangled on the floor, he sat still, waiting for her to regain her self awareness and calm down from whatever torment her mind conjured up.

"Lucy, you're okay," He assured her from afar, hoping his voice got through her muddled mind, "You're in your room with me and Virgo."

Her short pants slowly grew into deep breathes that she could count smoothly. She blinked her hazy eyes, letting the vivid memory of the woods disappear and instead take in the sight of her darkened room. Her racing heart settled at the same time both of her spirits gave her an encouraging smile.

"Good evening, Princess," Virgo took a step forward, giving Lucy a courtesy bow, "I hope you slept well."

Lucy rubbed her eyes, looking much smaller than her age, "What time is it?"

"It's about 8 PM," Loke replied as he watched her face morph into one of shock.

"8 PM?!" She shouted, jumping out of bed and running towards her bathroom, "I missed the whole day! I was supposed to go to the guild and see if Natsu wanted-" She cut herself off, halting her foot centimeters from touching the bathroom floor.

As realization dawned on her, both Loke and Virgo couldn't help but pity her. Instantly the stinging pain in her shins and the burn across her skin assaulted her body causing her to wince as her foot finally made contact with the tile. The recollection of yesterday's events flooded her mind, leaving that same crushing feeling she had been fleeing from this morning. She wouldn't be seeing Natsu today, or anyone from the guild for that matter. She couldn't face them, now or possibly ever again.

"Oh right," Lucy mumbled, forcing herself back around and stumbling back to her bed, "I almost killed Natsu."

Loke and Virgo cringed as Lucy painfully fell face first on her bed. Her words seemed louder the more Loke replayed them in his head, like a record stuck on repeat. He hadn't expected Lucy to wake up feeling herself again, nor had he expected her to forget what transpired on her mission with Team Natsu. No matter how hard he prepared himself for her mood to come crashing down again, it didn't stop him from hoping that she might handle things better this time around.

He and Virgo exchanged a silent observation, before both descended to either side of Lucy's bed. Both spirits sat them selves beside Lucy, offering a small amount of comfort to the blonde who was curling further into her mattress. As much as they both would like to soothe her worries and heart ache, smothering her wasn't the best idea. Instead, they made themselves a pillar of support for Lucy in her time of need.

After a few moments of silence, Lucy's muffled voice vibrated across the bed, "I'm sorry you guys had to come and babysit me."

"Babysit?" Virgo asked curiously, "Leo and I were helping you, not babysitting you."

Lucy choked out a distressing laugh that was cut off by her own tears. Her bruised body was pushed up by her elbows until she was on her hands and knees. She hated to admit how agonizing it was to move her aching muscles, and her skin was burning to the touch. The redness hadn't subsided. If anything it got more vividly colorful since she had fallen asleep. The only escape from the blinding crimson color was the white bandages wrapping her legs. But even she wasn't dense enough to believe that underneath the white cloth would be smooth, clear skin.

"Lucy," The blonde forcibly tore her eyes off of the monstrosity that was her destroyed body, giving Loke her distracted attention.

"I know you don't want to go back to the guild," He began with apprehension clear in his voice, "But that magic did something to you. We need to get you healed."

Lucy reflexively flinched inwards, dreading the lashing she would surely receive if she had to face Gray again. What if the guild decided she wasn't fit for Fairy Tail? When Natsu wakes up, will he blame her too? If she returned so soon, she might be there only to say goodbye, "You're right, I don't want to go back."

She didn't deserve their help or their kindness. Asking Wendy to treat her wounds would be selfish of her.. She wouldn't dare take magic energy away from Wendy when she may need it to save someone else in Fairy Tail, especially Natsu.

"Ever?" Virgo asked hesitantly, "You don't want to go back to Fairy Tail ever again?"

Lucy sat silently, contemplating that thought for a moment. She felt it was slightly melodramatic for her to think about never returning, and part of her felt guilty for even entertaining the idea given how Natsu had saved her to bring her there in the first place. She couldn't help but sigh that, yes, her journey to Fairy Tail began with Natsu coming to her rescue. Just like Gray had said, she never has been able to take care of herself without his help.

She wouldn't disgrace Natsu's generosity by throwing away the only home she has ever loved. Not after all he's done for her. But she still wasn't ready to face everyone. Especially so soon after she was exposed to the people she cared about most. The suggestion making her body jittery was enough of a reason for her to avoid the guild hall.

She needed time. Time to think and improve on herself and her strength. If she ever wanted to prove to Gray and the rest of Fairy Tail that she could handle herself, she needed to be stronger. She owed it to Natsu after he nearly gave his life to save hers. She dreaded the day Natsu actually faced death, and pleaded it never came from her hands.

"No," Lucy straightened herself out, finally looking more like the Lucy that Virgo and Loke could recognize, "I'll go back some day."

"Some day?" Loke sounded from beside her.

"Yeah," Lucy graced a small frown on her features, "I'm not ready to go back yet, I need to get stronger before I can call myself a Fairy Tail Wizard again."

"What do you mean, Princess?" Virgo leaned forward in anticipation.

With the assistance of her bed and Loke's shoulder, Lucy hoisted herself from her position and shuffled over to her nearby desk. She pulled out a used notebook from her drawer full of her drabbles and prompts she's experiment with in the past. As she turned to an empty page, she began to write a letter that was just the beginning to many.

Both of her guests remained quiet as her pencil flew across the paper fluidly. Neither spoke, instead choosing to patiently wait for Lucy to process her thoughts. She was grateful to have such caring spirits who would sacrifice so much to watch over her. They were like her guardian angels.

"I want to leave Magnolia," She said simply, not surprised at all by the surprised gasps her spirits gave her, "I know it's sudden, and I hope you all won't object," She ceased her writing, staring distantly at the paper before her, "I want to train my magic and body before I return to Fairy Tail. I need to be stronger, for myself and for Natsu."

Lucy tightened her grip on her pencil. Her eyes were foggy with unshed tears and her mind was disorganized with unpleasant thoughts. She never imagined she'd be leaving Fairy Tail, or Natsu for that matter. She'd figured if her time to part were to ever come it would be under pleasant farewells and parting gifts. A part of her always dreamed that if that day ever came, then Natsu would be the one to accompany her.

She rubbed away at her eyes, squashing her thoughts about her possible, not-so-secret crush on her friend. She couldn't afford to think about what if's.

"I trust in you and your decisions," Loke spoke with compassion, something Lucy forced herself to not push away, "and if this is what you want, then all of us will stay by your side."

Virgo gave her familiar smile, "Whatever Princess desires, I will follow."

Lucy felt her lips curl, and a happiness she hadn't felt in the past 24 hours was starting to blossom in her chest. Her gratitude must have shown on her face when both Loke and Virgo mirrored her expression. Lucy should consider herself lucky for having such wonderful, understanding spirits.

But they weren't just Spirits, they were her friends. And they showed just how much they cared by their actions today. Lucy just hoped she could repay them for their good deeds.

"Thank you, guys," Lucy faced her notebook once more, with a half written letter made out to the Fairy Tail guild, "I have to write a few last minute messages to people who may need information, but I want to leave tonight."

"Woah, tonight?" Loke shouted in alarm, startling Lucy out of her slight trance, "What about that rash? Your skin is all red and stuff!"

His worry was endearing to Lucy, which made guilt build in her stomach for that thought to even cross her mind, "I'll visit a doctor tomorrow, just not in Magnolia."

Loke stared at her, looking displeased with her decision, but not knowing whether he should challenge her or not.

"Loke," She chuckled lightly, "I promise."

Hey guys! I've been spending so much time on this chapter and it ended up being about twice as long as the last one lol. I have up to Chapter 7 planned out so far, and I'm playing around with some ideas after that! I really hope you guys enjoy this, idk if it's exactly how I wanted it to turn out but I felt like if I added anything else to this it might be a little too much haha. And I promise you, Natsu wakes up next chapter. Get ready for that lol.

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