She

Rain.

It was raining that day, wasn't it? Of course it was. Why else would you have given me that umbrella?

The rain had poured down so suddenly, catching everyone off guard. Many kids went home drenched. I was certain that was going to be me too. Until...

Until along came you, carrying that elegant black umbrella. You shuffled up to me uncertainly, sheepishly, speaking in a young boyish voice, like a gentle lamb, like a newborn bird learning to sing.

I was angry with you then, wasn't I? I thought you'd put gum on my seat in class.

You came to apologise, for the misunderstanding, for making me feel upset. I'd never seen a boy so vulnerable, so... soft and innocent as you. You stood there, tousling your golden spun hair nervously, anxiously, staring at me with those deep green eyes of yours.

Something funny happened to my heart. A warm, fluttery feeling filled my stomach, catching my breath and stealing it away.

I couldn't look away. My body felt oh so light, lighter than air, my soul was drifting, leaving the ground.

I suddenly realised you were still waiting, waiting for me to respond, to answer your eager eyes. I said... something... I can't remember what, and it must have been good because suddenly you lit up. You smiled then, a beautiful, wonderful smile that was so full of awe and light. That smile was the meaning of joy and happiness.

My mind was blank, but I hope that I smiled back, to show you how much your smile meant to me.

You kept talking, but I didn't hear what you were saying.

Thunder rumbled in the distance, startling the both of us. We turned to look and the rain came down even harder, pelting the ground so forcefully droplets bounced back into the air.

Then you offered your umbrella, a skittish look about you, as if you didn't know what you were supposed to do. I took too long to react, I remember. But still you waited patiently, giving me a hopeful little turn of your lips.

I accepted the umbrella, too dumbstruck to even say thank you. I stood there, unmoving, paralysed by you, your sparkling eyes, your golden hair, your soft voice.

That's when everything went black. That's when the umbrella closed on my head, isn't it? That's when you laughed.

Your laugh...

There aren't enough words to describe your laugh. It was joy, carefree and wild, like a bubbling brook and the sun shining, the birds whistling, a caressing breeze. It was bright, it was full, it was melodious, it was breathtaking. It was everything good, music to my ears, and it ended far too soon.

I laughed too, opening the umbrella to watch you laugh so freely and naturally, head tilted back and eyes closed.

My heart was racing, and it felt so right. Like my heart should always beat a million miles a minute, pumping and thumping, steadily and yet not, sending warmth coursing through my body. Like I've lived my life never walking properly. Who cares for solid ground? Walking on air sends butterflies to your stomach and thrills to your bones, your senses sky rocketing from the electric danger of falling. And I was inches away from the drop.

This felt right, standing here with you. I was meant to meet you, on this I was sure. Rain poured above us, the only witness to our little secret.

Then you left. I walked home. I don't know how I found my way home, but somehow I made it there, even as your eyes were all I could see, your laugh all I could hear.

I forgot to use the umbrella. I must have been a sight, arriving home with an umbrella, but soaked to the bone somehow. I guess I still got wet, just like everyone else huh?

You never asked for that umbrella back. Maybe it's selfish, but I didn't give to you either. It reminded me of that day. It still does.

But it's really the rain that stirs up nostalgia within me.

Because it was raining that day, wasn't it?