Chapter 15: Redefining and Relearning Gentlemanly Ways

A tap distracted Arthur from his writing. He looked around his room, not seeing anything, but something tapped again. He glanced at his window.

"You've got to be kidding me."

He stalked to the window and opened it to see Francis standing in the grass pebble in hand.

"Stop throwing rocks, you wanker!" Arthur whisper yelled.

Francis whispered yelled back, hands cupped around his mouth, "But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Arthur is the sun." He made sure to emphasize Arthur's name.

Arthur began climbing out of the window onto the roof. He rolled his eyes at Francis's antics but still muttered, "Ay, me!" while sliding the window mostly closed.

Now experienced, he made quick work of climbing down from the roof and did it with ease. He landed with a soft thump next to Francis.

Francis whistled appreciatively.

"Shut up, Frog, you'll have to do it one day to visit."

Francis made a show of analyzing the path Arthur took humming. "Maybe I could do it for you."

Arthur huffed, "Was expecting you a little earlier."

"I thought it'd be best to wait as late as possible to not get caught. Besides, everyone just visits for the first thirty minutes anyways. We'll be fashionably late."

"Gentlemen aren't late."

Francis went to hook his arm in Arthur's. "Then you won't be a gentleman tonight."

He winked. Arthur removed his arm and pushed a laughing Francis away.

"Shut up."

They bickered most of the walk there, but Arthur loved every second of it.

Arthur paused on the sidewalk. "Maybe, I should just come next month." From a distance he could see lights on in the bookshop. As much as he wanted to experience this part of Francis's life, meeting so many people was a little out of his depth. Honestly, he could use a drink to loosen him up.

Francis paused a few steps ahead of Arthur and turned around. Arthur was looking beyond him at the shop with his arms crossed shifting on his feet. Francis stepped up to Arthur slowly.

"You've come this far."

Arthur swallowed.

Francis tilted his head. "You read the book."

"I should wait until it's one I really liked, so that I can contribute something."

"No one expects you to be the smartest person in the room."

Arthur met Francis's gaze. "What are they expecting?"

Francis shifted his weight to his heels. "Probably not much. I can't say. Felix will be there."

Arthur scoffed. "Great. I'll be mauled."

"Doubtful."

Arthur rubbed at his face as if that could psych himself up. To himself he whispered, "Yeah, okay, yeah."

Francis didn't wait for Arthur to finish whatever ritual he was going through. Instead, he grabbed Arthur's wrist and pulled him across the street ignoring any protests.

As they neared the door Francis mocked, "If you struggle, when we get in everyone is going to think you don't want to be here."

Arthur stopped his struggling and settled on glaring at Francis as he was pulled into the building. The feel of the bookstore was different than during the group meetings Arthur had been attending. Everyone had collected chairs from around the store and from the back and put them in an open area used for in-store reading. Someone walked out of the backroom carrying two couch cushions to set on the floor.

Less than half the people milling about looked familiar, but at least not all of them were complete strangers. Plus, they seemed nice judging by how they were chatting and joking with each other - a few sitting reading alone, something Arthur could relate to. He wanted to keep observing to try to mentally mark each person, but stopped the moment he made eye contact with a person storming straight towards him.

"Arthur Kirkland," Felix shouted as he walked up. He paused in front of Arthur distracted. Arthur traced his line of sight down to where Francis was gently holding his wrist. In one swift movement, Arthur jerked his hand away from Francis and looked back up at Felix. Great, now Felix was smirking and looking between Francis and Arthur.

"Oh?" Felix's outburst was addressed more to Francis than Arthur, but Arthur took it as his cue to speak, not noticing the look Francis shot Felix.

"How have you been, Felix?"

"Are you really going to ask me that?"

Arthur hesitated, "Yes?"

Felix smacked Arthur on the arm.

Arthur complained to Francis, "I thought you said he wasn't going to hit me!"

"I only said he wouldn't maul you."

Arthur turned back to Felix who was glaring at him, arms crossed. "I'm sorry if that means anything."

"Sorry for what?" Felix prodded.

"Being a jerk."

"And?"

"And, well, ignoring you guys. I had a feeling you wanted to try to help, but just, I guess I was purposely avoiding that."

Felix pursed his lips. "You're forgiven."

Francis spoke up. "Good, because this is book club, and we are supposed to keep things light."

Felix raised a well-groomed eyebrow at Francis and pointed a finger at him dramatically. "We," he poked at Francis's chest, "apparently have a lot to talk about if you know what I mean. Now I am stealing this," Felix grabbed at Arthur's wrist, "strapping young man away to sit next to me, so we can catch up.

"Oh come on," Francis complained while following behind, "I barely get to see him."

In the end, Arthur sat between Felix and Francis for the duration of book club. The group itself was nice. For once, Arthur kind of felt like he was surrounded by like-minded people. The odd thing was the feeling that everyone thought they knew him and that he was being particularly observed. He couldn't keep up with weird comments people were making or the intrigued looks they'd give him. He wasn't sure if Francis or Felix had told stories about him, but someone definitely had. At least there were enough familiar faces that he didn't feel completely out of his depth.

"Arthur, any suggestions about what to read next?" A girl with pigtails whose name Arthur couldn't remember asked.

"What?"

"You're new, so why not have you choose the next one?"

The way Felix rolled his eyes hinted that the proposition wasn't as innocent as it seemed.

Arthur shifted, "Probably not the best idea. I don't know what you guys have done so far."

A guy from Arthur's group, Edward, clarified, "We end up fighting about the same titles all the time anyway and, then, after way too long end up picking something random."

"We can just start the debate with you."

"I don't know," Arthur trailed off.

Edward said, "Just say a book you read recently that you liked."

Arthur looked at Francis for help. Francis met his gaze, amusement in his eyes. His lips quirked, but his nod of support was still comforting. With a brief look around the circle, Arthur accepted his fate. At least he knew Francis would never judge him for his book choices. No matter what everyone else thought he would always have one person on his side.

He said the first title that came to mind.

" Pride and Prejudice?"

The eruption throughout the room was unexpected. Apparently, this was a point of contention. After taking a moment to hear what people were saying, maybe not. The tone was mostly amusement.

"Seriously?"

"Did Francis tell you to say that?"

Arthur looked at Francis where most of the comments were being addressed. He couldn't remember a time where Francis blushed. It was… nice.

A comment from Pigtails distracted Arthur. "Of course Mr. Darcy would pick Pride and Prejudice."

Edward admonished her, "Shut up."

Felix spoke over everyone, "Actually," he paused noting attention was on him, "We actually have done that one before, but we could always do something in the same vein." Someone groaned but Felix continued making a show of ignoring the outburst, " Emma maybe?"

A debate continued, but there was an ebb and flow to it as if these were familiar motions that played out the same way over and over. Using the discussion as a distraction, Francis mouthed sorry to Arthur who shrugged it off. He was new, and was not likely to get all the little eccentricities of the group so easily. Although, he wasn't sure if the Mr. Darcy nickname was supposed to be a jab or not.

In the end, they ended up settling on Emma and the large group slowly broke apart - the meeting being over, but people not yet ready to end the social event.

Arthur decided to make himself useful and help put the bean bag and couch cushions back since he knew where they went. The moment let himself get separated from his two friends. He drifted around making small talk with strangers and better introducing himself all while sneaking glances at where Francis was having a conversation with Felix.

Edward surprised him by patting him on the shoulder. "I didn't realize you were the friend Francis was bringing by."

Arthur flickered through his memory of group trying to think of how often he mentioned Francis's name; then, he tried to imagine conversations here where his name would have come up.

"Francis was the one who told me about the, uh, groups offered here." Arthur inwardly winced. He never was sure how to handle mentioning group outside of it. He must have done alright, because Edward just nodded thoughtfully.

"Small world."

"I guess so." Arthur shifted.

Edward gave him a smile. "Well, it's nice to have you around here. Hope you'll come back next time."

"That's the plan."

"Then, I'll see you then," Edward said before lifting his hand in a casual way and heading towards the door.

Arthur took that moment to look around. The store was emptying fast with more than half the people gone and the rest still filtering out. He shifted. The question was whether to expect Francis to walk back with him or not. Just because Francis walked with him on the way didn't mean he'd want to spend his night going out of his way to walk Arthur back home.

Felix was talking at Francis more so than the two were in conversation. With a deep breath, Arthur walked over planning to say goodbye to his friends as to not appear too clingy. Felix stopped talking as Arthur approached, causing Francis to turn around.

"Hey, guys, I'm going to head out."

"Wait," Francis said quickly. He glanced at Felix, "I'll walk with you."

"And it's about time I head out too," Felix's voice dripped with amusement. "I'll see you guys around." He gripped Francis' shoulder as he left.

Arthur wasted no time. "Do you have everything?"

Francis patted his satchel that held the book of the month. "Yep. Let's go."

They burst into the night, the quiet of outside a vast contrast to the noise and warm light of the bookstore. Together they walked the first block in silence.

Francis fiddled with the strap of his satchel. "So how did you like it?"

"It wasn't bad. I recognized some of the people… but I guess I shouldn't say that, huh?"

Francis shrugged. "It's expected. Small community and all."

They talked a little about the book and everyone's thoughts. Francis said he had Emma if Arthur wanted to borrow it. After a few blocks, Arthur gained the courage to ask something that was bugging him.

"Did they want me to be there?"

Francis slowed. "Why wouldn't they? Did someone say something to you?"

"Not really. Some of them were just acting strange."

Francis huffed in amusement and ran a hand through his hair not meeting Arthur's eyes. "Oh, they were just teasing me."

"I… yeah, I don't get that." They slowed to a stop. Arthur furrowed his brow. If people were weird about him being there, he'd rather know.

Francis stopped next to him and gave him a searching look. "I've talked about you before. Of course they were going to try to tease me when I brought you."

Arthur shook his head obviously missing something but not quite able to connect it in his head. Francis stared at him. His mouth twitched once the only break from his seriousness.

"Come on. You have to know at this point."

Arthur swallowed. "Know what?"

Francis's face changed so slightly Arthur would have missed it if he wasn't looking so intently.

"You -" Francis shook his head in disbelief. "You're being serious?"

"Out with it, Frog."

Francis pinched his face briefly in thought. "Okay, fuck it."

He stepped forward closing the distance between them, cupped a hand around the back of Arthur's neck, and kissed him. Arthur's eyebrows lifted in surprise and then fell as his body reacted to what was happening. Instinctually, he slid his arms around Francis.

The touch of their lips was gentle and slow at first, almost hesitant, but Francis became more assertive the moment he realized Arthur was responding. Arthur was lost in the feeling, his heart beating loudly in his ears, his brain completely shut off. This was nothing like it was before. This was nothing like it had ever been with anyone before.

If being with Francis could make time disappear, kissing Francis proved that every aspect of Arthur's world was a construct, one that Francis could break apart time and time again.

When Francis pulled back first, Arthur tried to follow him before realizing the frozen moment had ended and time began again. They stared at each other standing so close their breaths mingled together. Both pairs of eyes flickered around each other's faces trying to take in every crevice, every aspect of a response.

Arthur spoke first in a whisper.

"Wow."

Francis's lips twitched up slightly, but his eyes sparkled with the light of a full grin. "Yeah."

He slid his hand down to grab Arthur's wrist gently, and they began walking again this time as one. In the calmness of the night, Francis rubbed his thumb back and forth on Arthur's palm, a grounding movement.

Arthur wanted to say something. He felt like he should say something. Francis was the one to initiate the kiss after all, but all he could do was hold himself back from touching his lips. The jumble of his thoughts spun around until he decided to just be honest.

"I wasn't expecting that."

"If you weren't such a shit liar, I'd think you were pulling my leg."

Arthur snorted.

Francis tapped his thumb against Arthur's palm a few times. "I thought I was always very forward about it and that maybe you just weren't…"

"I've had a lot going on."

Francis hummed thoughtfully.

Silence settled over them again. It lingered nicely around Francis, but only served to make Arthur feel agitated. Something felt a little off like he wasn't being understood or was being analyzed when he didn't need to be. He was not about to let that stand.

He paused. "Hey Francis?"

Before Francis could say anything, Arthur fisted the front of his shirt, pulled him down, and kissed him harshly. Francis stumbled and grabbed Arthur's hips to steady himself. Arthur slid one hand from the front of Francis's shirt into his hair gripping. He pressed forward in an attempt to show just how reciprocated all of Francis's feelings were and maybe even more. Francis's hands tightened on his hips.

The need for air was the only thing that made Arthur pull back. Once he opened his eyes, he was greeted with a disheveled and grinning Francis.

Heat invaded Arthur's cheeks. He lightly pushed at Francis's shoulder. "Shut up."

Francis went to grab at Arthur's wrist again before the other could take his first step, and they continued walking together.

Francis laughed, "Now that was unexpected."

"Done it before."

"Under very different circumstances."

Arthur grunted in agreement, still feeling embarrassed by his actions. At that moment, he had forgotten where he was; the possible consequences. Kissing Francis felt natural. At that moment, he had forgotten they were outside.

Francis began rubbing at Arthur's palm again as if he could sense some kind of conflict within his friend. "I really did think you always knew."

"Knew what?" Arthur asked, wondering if Francis was suggesting Arthur hadn't needed any kind of self-discovery.

"That I love you of course."

Arthur stopped walking again. Francis took a step forward not expecting the pause and pulled at Arthur's arm briefly before turning to face his with a curious gaze.

Francis's lips quirked as he admitted, "I haven't tried to hide it ever. Actually, I thought sometimes there was awkwardness between us as friends because you felt weird about it." Francis tilted his head. "But it's okay."

Arthur stuttered, still wide-eyed at the confession. "I… I-"

Francis's face grew more serious as he interrupted, "You don't need to say anything. It's fine. I thought you had pretty much figured it out by now, and just realized you still haven't. That's on me."

Arthur nodded, still processing as they began walking again. He glanced down at their hands, still together. He glanced up at Francis's face. The other was looking forward into some unexisting distance obviously in his own head. What Arthur wouldn't give to be able to read Francis's mind, to understand him enough to know what he was thinking right now.

They were nearing his house. The air between them felt weird, some mix between tenseness and perfection — the breeze felt at a precipice before the risk to fall or fly. Arthur didn't have much longer to figure out what to do about it.

With a deep breath he slid his hand, so instead of Francis holding onto his wrist, their fingers were properly intertwined. He gave Francis a nervous smile. Francis grinned, squeezed his hand, and hip-checked him lightly.

Francis still rubbed his thumb back and forth on Arthur's hand as he eyed Arthur's growing house. The words in his throat never came out. Instead, he escorted Arthur to the tree in his back garden. With reluctance, he slid his hand from Arthur's.

He patted the tree and teased, "I think this is your stop."

Arthur snorted and leaned against the tree. "No shit."

Francis stood by as Arthur stared up at the stars. When Arthur didn't make a move to go inside Francis stated, "I'm not leaving until I see that you climb in safely."

Arthur couldn't fight the smile growing on his face, but he continued tracing the familiar patterns in the sky. At Francis's impatient huff, he turned his head and said, "You should come to my show this week."

"Oh?"

Arthur leaned forward to stand properly. "We have a show in two days. Maybe you'll like it."

"Only maybe?"

Arthur shrugged goodnaturedly. "It's a shit slot on a shit day for a reason, but it's a time."

"Yeah, sure, that sounds fun."

Arthur nodded and gave Francis the details adding that he shouldn't stop by the Kirkland's to get him — soundcheck and all.

"Just keep some low expectations."

Francis mock soluted. "Scout's honor."

Arthur rolled his eyes and started preparing to climb the tree.

"Arthur?"

Arthur paused. Francis stepped until their bodies were almost flush. Arthur swallowed heavily watching Francis's eyes. Raising a hand to the back of Arthur's neck, Francis kissed him on the forehead, letting his lips linger as he whispered, "Goodnight, Arthur."

Breathless, Arthur responded, "Yeah."

Francis took a few steps back as Arthur began to climb. He unsuccessfully hid his chuckling at the thought of Arthur making these maneuvers to the roof even while drunk. Ignoring Francis to the best of his ability, Arthur shuffled across the roof to his window. He opened it, put one leg over the ledge, and paused.

He turned to look back at Francis who was watching from below in the back garden. Butterflies fluttered inside him in response to the look on Francis's face. The dryness in his throat wouldn't go away no matter how hard he swallowed, so he spoke through the grain, "Goodnight, Francis. Have a safe walk home."

With that, he disappeared into the window and closed it behind him. The quiet inside his room was not the same as the quiet of the back garden with Francis.