Chapter 6: Harsher Truths

By: castawaycal

"It's good to see you again, Orihime."

Aizen looked the same as he had a month ago. Soft smile, kind eyes. His face was too trustworthy, and Orihime truly felt for the shinigami in Soul Society who had been deceived by his facade. Rukia had told her a while back that he was a beloved captain, someone that no one had ever thought twice about trusting. It's what made him so fearful, his complete understanding of others' perception of him.

The door shut behind her and she had to consciously will herself to continue forward. She didn't think she could ever forget the pain he had inflicted on the people she cared about most, even if they had abandoned her.

If it weren't for Ulquiorra's steady presence behind her, she didn't think she would be able to stand another conversation with him. Before, she had been lonely and desperate enough to hear his request. Now, a small flame was burning in her chest, one that she refused to let die out.

She mustered a small bow.

"Please," Aizen said, motioning to the same table they sat at before. "Sit. You too, Ulquiorra."

They both obeyed, taking seats next to each other and across from Aizen.

"How are you liking Las Noches, Orihime?"

"I'm growing used to it," she said.

Aizen leaned back in his seat. "How is your room? The food?"

She wanted to ask him why he was acting like he actually cared, but bit back the retort. "My room is fine, although a little more light would be nice. The food is… edible."

The former captain let out a small laugh. "I'll switch out the cooks. I, too, have found it lacking in flavor. As for your room, I'll have Ulquiorra escort you to one with a skylight."

Orihime blinked, her surprise likely evident on her face.

"No need to look so shocked," he said, noticing the expression. "Of course I want you to feel comfortable in your new home."

Last time, he'd used "home" as a taunt and it had worked. This time, the word still caused her stomach to drop, but strangely she didn't feel sad. She had come to accept that she would be here for a long time, not forever, but perhaps until she could properly face her fate.

"Thank you, Aizen-sama."

It was best for her to comply with whatever he sent her way for now. Utilizing Aizen's resources would be the safest and smartest move. And she really did want more light in her room.

"No need to thank me. Ulquiorra's reported that you've been making progress recently, which I am very glad to hear. How has he been treating you, by the way?"

Orihime turned to look at Ulquiorra, but he didn't seem to notice. "He… has been a good teacher."

She kept her eyes on him, but still he would not turn his head to meet her gaze. For some reason, she felt disappointed by his lack of reciprocation.

"I assigned him to you for that very reason. I'm sure you know the others can be quite volatile," Aizen turned his attention to this fourth Espada. "Ulquiorra has always been reliable."

"Yes, Aizen-sama," Ulquiorra dead-panned, his first words since he had come to her room to escort her to Aizen's chambers.

Aizen smiled at that, like an owner watching his dog obey a command. Orihime's body suddenly felt heavy.

He shifted that same smile towards her. "The reason I called you both here today was to offer some guidance for your training, Orihime. Ulquiorra tells me you've been working on resurrecting creatures of Hueco Mundo - I was pleased to hear that you were successful in that. Tell me, is it taxing?"

Orihime tried to ignore the look on his face. It brought old feelings to rise, made her think about those traitorous thoughts she used to have every minute. She'd been successful in shoving those aside these past few weeks, the promise of getting stronger giving her elsewhere to put her attention. But Aizen made her remember why she was here, why she was powerless against his will. It was unfair that he could control her so completely like this.

She inhaled deeply before responding, willing her voice to be steady. "No, Aizen-sama. Not anymore."

His smile deepened. "Good. I would like you to move on to reconstructing landscapes, not just singular objects."

"Landscapes?" Ulquiorra asked before she could.

"Yes," Aizen said, bracing his elbows on the table and resting his head on his hands. "The Vagabond are not the only thing I want you to recover. I want the entirety of the old Hueco Mundo. To do that, Orihime will need to be able to reconstruct multiple things at once."

"That is impossible, Aizen-sama," Ulquiorra spoke again. "She has not advanced enough for such an immense task."

Even though it may have been true, the words stung. Sure, she wasn't nearly skilled enough to complete Aizen's request of resurrecting The Vagabond, but it hurt to think Ulquiorra didn't think she was ready to at least take the next step. They had been working tirelessly to make sure she was making progress, but had it not been enough to him?

"That's harsh, Ulquiorra," Aizen purred. "Orihime here looks saddened by your lack of trust in her abilities."

Orihime did her best to wipe that look off her face immediately. How foolish she was, always wearing her emotions so clearly -

"She is not ready," Ulquiorra repeated.

Aizen watched Ulquiorra carefully, yet unlike her, the Espada betrayed nothing with his expression. "Orihime," Aizen said without taking his attention away from Ulquiorra. "Do you currently believe you can resurrect multiple beings at once?"

She didn't know what the correct answer was. On one hand, she believed Ulquiorra's words. Even if she had improved a bit in the past few weeks, she hadn't even thought about having to focus on multiple things at once. Doing so would require her to have immense focus on two or more beings, their energies, their souls, their dispositions before death.

But she also had the urge to defy that expectation of her. She remembered when Ulquiorra and Yammy had first come to the human world. Trembling and powerless, she'd obeyed silently as Chad told her to heal Tatsuki. Then, when the Espada deigned to attack her, when Ulquiorra deemed her trash, she had to watch again as Ichigo came to her rescue once again.

Orihime couldn't believe she'd forgotten two important things. How much she loved Ichigo and hated herself in that moment, and that Ulquiorra had labelled her useless from the moment she appeared before his eyes.

In hindsight, it wasn't love at all. Admiration, perhaps. Deep respect for a friend who had always protected her, someone she could truly rely on. Ichigo had always been that kind of person. But in the end, maybe she was wrong about him. He too had left her behind, hadn't given her the benefit of the doubt. She was past resenting him for that, but it made her realize that he was just human. His protection had always been one-sided - he had never really needed her. It wasn't unconditional.

After being apart from him for so long, she had begun to realize how sheltered she'd truly been. Unlike Ichigo, Ulquiorra had always been forthcoming in his expectations of her. She had been trash, yes, but she knew that he didn't really believe that anymore. Because if he did, she would have been thrown out a long time ago. From their first interaction, he had been honest about the weight she should carry. She never realized until now how refreshing that was - to be seen not as one who required protection, but one capable of pulling her own weight.

But then why did Ulquiorra doubt her? That was the one thing she couldn't understand.

She decided to trust the fire in heart. "I believe I can."

Once they reached her room, Orihime burst.

"Why?" she asked as Ulquiorra shut the door behind them.

They had been completely silent on the walk back after Aizen had excused them. Now, they were finally alone and she could -

"Because it was the truth," he said with that same distant look in his eyes. He was turned away from her and still facing the door as if he very much wanted to leave.

She wouldn't let him. Not until she understood. "But I've been making progress. Every time we train, I always tell you to push me more. And with Szayelapporo's help -"

"You're not ready," he said sternly, cutting her off.

So unlike him to act without his usual composure. "Tell me, then," she exasperated. "Tell me why I'm not ready."

Finally, he turned and met her fierce gaze. The moment those emerald eyes peered into hers, she somehow forgot how to breathe. In just that short amount of time when he'd been averting his attention, she'd already forgotten the intensity of him.

"Aizen expects you to give your life to fulfill his request," he blurted. "There is no other way to bring an entire civilization back if you do not forfeit every last ounce of reiatsu you have. Even then, it still may not be enough."

Thoughts darted through her mind like bullets. Too many for her to focus on just one. Her life was at stake? It shouldn't have surprised her, she was a prisoner after all, but hearing it come from Ulquiorra's mouth made it seem like a death sentence due the next day.

No, if she was being completely honest with herself, she'd already known Aizen expected her to use the entirety of her lifeforce to materialize his wish. The Hogyoku's assistance he'd offered to her at the start was nothing but an empty promise meant to keep her from ending her own life. She had known that, and yet she willingly complied to his request for her to take the next step.

"I know," she admitted quietly. This time it was she who turned her back to him, suddenly unable to face him. "I know," she repeated a little louder this time. "But I have to take the next step or else…" she stopped herself before she could say more.

She almost revealed her intentions to Ulquiorra. Her impending betrayal of Aizen's orders.

"Or else what?" Ulquiorra pressed.

She couldn't trust him yet. No matter how much she wanted to confide in someone, anyone, about her intentions here in Hueco Mundo. For now, she would stall.

"Why do you care if Aizen expects me to give my life?"

Ulquiorra paused. After a moment, he finally said, "It would be a shame to see your efforts wasted."

Orihime ignored the small part of her that felt disappointment from his words. Still, she wanted to cling to the hope she had when she'd asked Ulquiorra that question. "Is… is that it?"

"My loyalties have always lied with Aizen-sama," Ulquiorra said rigidly. "Do not expect anything more from me, woman."

"I do expect more, Ulquiorra," she said, turning around to face him. "You said yourself that you were becoming curious about humans… you've changed since the first time we met in the human world."

His mouth had tightened into a thin line. "I can never be what you hope for."

Although those words were so characteristic of the Espada who had torn through her friends like they were nothing, she couldn't believe he really meant it. "You can," she insisted, taking a step closer to him.

There were so many unspoken feelings behind her words. Possibilities she could never name, harsher truths than she could ever truly admit to herself.

He recoiled. Orihime felt a sharp pain in her heart.

She could feel him closing off. Feel the distance between them spreading like a wildfire.

"Do not come near me," he said quietly.

At that moment, Orihime understood. That she was wrong, so wrong about this place, about the Espada, about her place here. How foolish she'd been, thinking that Las Noches could have become a temporary sanctuary for her. A place of growth. It was a prison, she was tied down to this place against her will.

Ulquiorra wasn't a friend. He was her captor. She would tell herself that over and over again until she was convinced it was true.

But it was that habit of hers, the one where she could never truly let go of someone, that made her take three steps forward and embrace him.

She felt him freeze beneath her touch. Her arms tightened despite her petrified mind, all she could think of was what a mistake this was, what a risk she was taking -

Her body had other ideas, traitorous intentions. The feeling of someone so close to her was the comfort she had been seeking this whole time. And Ulquiorra's presence, one that had grown on her with time, was the perfect solace to her raging thoughts.

"What," he finally got out. "What are you doing?"

He seemed bewildered, yet he didn't push her away. Orihime was relieved and continued to hug him.

"Showing you what it means to have more than just emptiness." Her eyes closed and she let herself feel his warmth against her cold skin.

With that, his shoulders relaxed slightly. He was easing more and more into her embrace and it brought peace to her heart. For the first time since she'd arrived in Hueco Mundo, she felt stable. She realized that was perhaps what she'd been craving this whole time - the reason she missed her home but not her friends as much as she would have liked.

They stood there for what felt like both eternity and no time at all. Finally, Orihime braced her hands on Ulquiorra's slender shoulders and took a step back so she could look him in the eye.

That distant expression had been replaced by one filled with wonder, the same one he gave her when she'd cried in front of him. Her heart ached with a feeling she'd never experienced before.

"Even if you tell me to go away, I'll stay. That's what it means to be human."

A softness grew in his gaze as he took her in. "I… want to stay," he admitted. "With you. That is why I wanted to prevent Aizen from hurrying your progress."

Her earlier thoughts about him being her captor shattered like glass. The way he said it was more to himself than her. Like he was just coming to the realization himself and needed to articulate it in order to fully understand his feelings. Although it sounded like a confession of sorts, Orihime wasn't foolish enough to think of his words in that way. These were new feelings for him, feelings that she had brought out. And that was enough.

She took his hands which were warm to the touch. "Admitting that is not a weakness."

Something like gratitude shown in his eyes. With heartbreaking gentleness, he squeezed her hands back. So insignificant. So intimate. So human.

"I have become strange," he said. "Just like you."

She let out a soft laugh. "Yes, be even stranger."

Again that ghost of a smile appeared on his lips. Orihime rejoiced in it, feeling more like herself now than she ever had before. It was becoming more and more evident that she truly liked who she was when she was around him. That's why it had felt so gratifying when he had affirmed that she had actually affected him, that her actions had moved him in some way.

The fire in her chest persisted, the flame raging through the night.

Ulquiorra was beginning to notice things he had never noticed before.

Like the stillness of all the hallways in Las Noches, the harsh winds of the desert, and the fireiness of Orihime Inoue's bright hair. The latter was especially prominent in his mind as he gazed upon her, his hands in hers, a fierce pulse beating through his body.

He had never felt like this before. So... uncontrollable. Although he'd tried to escape this feeling, the strange temptation of becoming more human-like, he soon realized it was impossible with her around.

She had embraced him after he pushed her away. Something so illogical would have annoyed him in the past, but he found that she had simply done exactly what he truly wanted in that moment. That was one of the things that drew him to her - that stark honesty and understanding for what others truly wanted.

Things were changing in him. If he still had his wits, he would have fought it. But now he felt that something beyond that was growing, something he had cursed, hated, and suppressed.

And he no longer felt afraid.

A/N: Stayed up until 3am for this one :,) Lmk what you think about that sliver of Ulquiorra's POV at the end! Also, things are finally picking up between them - or are they? Please leave a review, they make me really happy and encourage me to write faster. Also shoutout to Viri for always leaving such awesome reviews, this chapter is for you!