"When you walked out that door, a piece of me died." ─Lana
I could feel that he slowly started to let his guard down around me. Maybe it was pity, maybe it was guilt. I honestly didn't care what it was because right now I would take anything.
I came back to him. Acting like I was just a girl that was trying to put her broken life back together. And every time he got this look in his eyes, I would remind him of us. I exploited his soft spot for me.
I sipped my Chardonnay, sitting in this fancy restaurant waiting for him. Not alone, of course. His men hovered in the background. I couldn't go anywhere without them. Sam and Paul. Now I knew why they looked familiar. Those motherfuckers formerly worked for my dad.
Edward walked in after I had my second glass. iPhone glued to his ear. Hush angry authoritative voice to someone in another line. He looked pissed somehow. But when he spotted me, his lips almost automatically formed a grin. The call was forgotten, disconnected.
"Sorry to keep you waiting." He came up to me, giving a surprising kiss on the cheek. My fingers twitched. I still didn't get used to this.
"I thought you were not coming." I couldn't help but sound cynical. One thing I really hated the most was waiting. He knew it.
"I said sorry." He repeated. Case closed. He never liked arguing over small things. It was wasting his time, he said.
The waitress came up to our table with a big ass smile, partially ignoring the heavy atmosphere. Edward ordered a random set of menu for both of us as soon as he realized I wouldn't say a word.
We were silent. But his eyes couldn't help but raking over this silky satin navy dress that I was wearing for a mission. Blue was his favorite color on me. He kept his mouth shut even though I knew it was on the tip of his tongue. He adored it. He fell for it.
Our food came and still silent. Even Sam and Paul were standing uncomfortably as if they couldn't bear it. Edward cut his steak. I didn't touch mine.
He looked like he would kill in his seat.
I turned my eyes away from those piercing emeralds. To the blinks of city lights below me. Glamorous and beautiful, but also dark and deadly.
"Some part of you don't change." My reflection was smiling back at me. Sweet and innocent. I could do this shit all day if I wanted to.
He tilted his head. "And that's a bad thing?"
I shifted my attention back to him, shrugging. "Not entirely. But I just can't, you know, hate you less."
That grin reappeared. He was relaxed like I just flipped the switch. Sam and Paul almost breathed in relief at the same time. "Glad you tried, though."
I rolled my eyes, but started to eat with him.
The food, the view, even us, felt perfect. Still, there was something, a hole in my chest. That kind of feeling, hiding in the corner. A reminder that I could never be whole again. Damn it, my game was just begun and it was already exhausting.
An hour later, we finished the meal. His phone vibrated on table. Again. Hell, I didn't think it stopped at all. He was totally ignoring it. I found hard to not glance at the screen, but his eyes were on me the entire time. Whatever it was, there had to be something going on that required his attention.
He stood up and finally took the call. Jaw hardened, angry whispers. I got up on my seat. He hang up and looked stressed. Like he wanted to breathe for a second. I was only watching. I didn't ask if everything was okay─like I used to─because the answer would be the same.
"How badly do you want to see the ballet tonight?" he questioned. We walked side to side, exiting the restaurant. Putting on our coats as we got in the elevator with Sam and Paul tagging along.
"It's Nutcracker." I replied like it would solve everything.
He was aware it was my favorite. As this thing between us shifted toward, maybe, good direction, I almost could hear─it could be wrong─regret in his voice. "I have to be somewhere else."
I stepped out first as the elevator hit the lobby. He was right behind. The unlit cig was already between my lips as I reached the lighter inside my coat. A long drag and no words.
His black Lambo on the driveway and I made a way to an opened passenger door. He followed after. We sat in silence for two minutes straight before we drove away.
"I can't go, baby." That. He dropped the bomb.
I laughed. As if I was crazy. I couldn't decide either I was too consumed in this game or just losing my shit.
"Does this situation seem familiar to you?" I let out a smoke, grinning. He was recalling something or maybe, trying to. "Nothing ever goes as planned every time we go out." I continued. I almost said 'on a date' but thank fuck. Just thinking about saying it out loud made me really want to puke. "Like I said, some part of you don't change."
He turned to me, but didn't say anything.
"The question is…" I smiled, most to myself. "Can you promise me a different ending?"
It was expected. I would always go for a dramatic one. I, as in my young character. Ten years ago me. I was sinking back into it. A stupid girl who believed she was restarting her life. I just needed his guard down for as long as I could. Because when he finally caught it, that was a game over for me.
His Lambo was parked in the back of the building I knew damn well. New Moon, an exclusive club in Chicago, owned by the Masens. When I said I knew damn well didn't mean I had been here before. Edward never allowed me or Alice in because we were underage. Sounded bullshit, right?
"We can't make it. To the ballet." He stated the obvious. No sorry. Indeed, I misheard the regret. Hell, I probably hallucinated.
"Doesn't explain why we're here." I said flatly.
He killed the engine then opened the door. "The night is still young."
I opened mine too and slid out of the car. "And you think I will be enjoying my time here?"
He smirked. "Why not? Aren't you curious?"
Whatever I was about to say didn't change the fact that we were going in. Typical him. Arguing was a waste of time.
It was not a disadvantage for me, though. I could observe this place while he was doing I didn't know what.
We passed the back entrance and we were in. All eyes on us but no one came near. Edward was already on his phone again while I was here feeling out of place. This mask even almost slipped off as he wasn't looking. No. Get a fucking grip. I had come this far.
We were up to the second floor. Rounds of table filled with people in formal dress. Burlesque show on the stage.
"Wait here."
I looked at him with disinterest, but didn't object. I took a seat, claiming the empty table. He then turned around and disappeared. Sam or Paul was probably hovering somewhere in the corner like usual. Drinks were quickly served on my table, but I didn't touch it. I burned my lungs again instead.
My peace only lasted for five minutes. No one dared to approach me except for that one person. That bitch. What was she doing here? She looked strikingly beautiful. Golden hair and blue eyes. A body to kill. She was confident, sitting in front of me with no shame. Not even asking permission. On my peripheral I could see Paul moving closer, just in case.
"Look who decides to show up."
We exchanged the fakest smile.
"Been a long time." It was a lame reply.
"Well? The long lost princess is finally found. Are you ready to catch up?" She was enjoying it. But maybe I could use this opportunity to gain the information I needed.
I raised my eyebrow.
"A lot of things happened."
She gulped down my drink. "Yeah, and the fact your man was going insane ever since you know, everyone left." She shrugged off causally and I was all ears for it. She was talking about Alice and Esme. "Poor him, all alone."
"What happened?" I acted nonchalant.
"Well, you are not the only one that has a heck of problems." She leaned in. "This city just becomes…suffocating, you know?" Well, never agreed more.
"So, where are they?" I puffed, trying to be impassive. I didn't know why I wanted to know.
"Huh? Some say back to Italy. Can't be sure." She drank as I registered everything. I sensed the shift in her. She was being careful with me.
She stood all of a sudden. And I couldn't help but wonder how she could walk in those heels after all the drinks she had.
"C'mon, I'll show you around." She grabbed my hand and we strutted to some dimmed corridor on the left.
Is it a good idea?
She threw back a laughter and I realized I just voiced it out loud. "That fire has died down, huh?" she teased. I rolled my eyes at that. If only she knew, right? I couldn't be careless here. I had to stay on his good side until I figured out everything. I looked around taking my surroundings. Damn it, where was Paul?
After another never ending corridor, we finally stopped at some door guarded by two men. They exchanged glances as they saw us approaching.
"Sorry, Miss. We can't let you in." One of them said.
Lottie's eyebrow raised high. She couldn't accept it. "Do you know who we are?" her thumb pointed at herself then me. Now I literally rolled my eyes. She was going to play that card?
They nodded their head. "But, Miss─"
"Whatever, boys, now step away." They were reluctant, but in the end giving in. And here I was, hoping they would put more effort than this shitty blockage.
All heads turned to us. Words hang in the air. We interrupted a business meeting. Which by the look of it was very important. Wait, was that Felix Volturi? And his cousin, uh, Alec? Edward was sitting on the other side. And of course, there was Pete. Lottie's brother.
"Ah, about time." Pete muttered. He seemed bored as fuck.
"Well, look who's coming." Felix grinned. The look he gave us was kinda disgusting.
"Gentlemen." Lottie nodded her head, swaying her hips all the way in. "Everything's good?" She poured herself a drink. I leaned against the wall, taking a long pull of my cig.
"Even better when you're here." He winked at her. I had to cover my cringe.
Lottie and Pete exchanged secretive glances. Eyes talking. It was sibling's thing. Edward drank his whiskey, but watched in silence.
"Oh, I'm glad." She smirked sexily, making her way to the dangerous territory.
Edward put down his glass, getting up from his seat. Right now, nobody gave a single fuck. He grabbed my hand and we were out of the room in seconds. "Let them lazy ass do the negotiation with Volturi." He said. I could hear Pete's annoyed sigh from across the room before the door closed behind us.
He led me to another room. An office. Probably his. I didn't know. I didn't care. I wandered. Away from his proximity. Pretended to adore a painting on the wall. The heavy air was slowly choking me. Suddenly I was nervous to be around him.
His gaze bore to my back. I tried to be calm but even the nicotine failed.
His steps were counted in my head until he stopped right behind. I inhaled deep because I tensed as fuck. Those hands running down my sides. His hot touch against this thin silky material. It took everything in me not to stub my cig on the back of his hand.
His lips made a contact with my bare skin on the shoulder. I changed my mind immediately. Now I was a second away to stub my cig on his neck. Shit, I couldn't fucking ruin everything I had built, could I? But I couldn't just stand here like a statue either.
"You're so fucking gorgeous tonight." He breathed me in, filling the silence. Cloud of smoke out of my lips. I needed to relax a little for fucks sake.
I turned around. Bold move, but also stupid. I looked up, caged in those greens. He was staring deep while I was already drowning. He dragged me back to old times and this kind of feeling terrified me.
"I'm not leaving you again." He said out of the blue. It sounded like a promise and I prayed to God he didn't keep it. I smiled, or tried to.
"Is that so?"
"Yeah. Don't ever fucking leave." He grazed my cheek. A plead behind it. Like he needed something to hold on. We were so fucked up, weren't we?
I held his gaze for the longest time. Until he tilted his head and kissed me soft on the lips. Nothing I expected. It was brief, just lips touching lips. But enough to make my head spin. He was hesitant to take more. But this shit was more intimate somehow. It was a start line. A beginning. I got him where I wanted him.
I placed my head over his chest. The move surprised him. Hell, it even surprised me too.
But I was feeling blue all of a sudden. The loneliness came in waves wrapping me like a death grip. It was just…numb.