Tony and the Water Demon (part I)
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Tony found himself sitting in his kitchen with only Jaken, the least likely member of the Tower's newest misfit brigade to want his company.
Well, that was if you didn't count the five Chicago Blackhawk Roombas he impulsively ordered. He was pretty sure the Roombas were swarming in formation against him. He didn't know how they could be programed that way, but he swore everything was simply not going his way, Roombas included.
He should have just made some himself, but he had his hands 'busy'.
Jaken eyed him. He eyed him back. Tony could easily do petty.
It's not like he wanted him around either.
Not only was he completely oblivious to anything that wasn't Sailor Moon, but he had what he assumed to be the intelligence of a B-movie zombie.
No wait, gremlin.
Having little in common with Toady was a considerable understatement. Though Tony had to admit it was pretty damn funny he beat Point Break so many times in Mario Kart. Tony forgot he even had the game, maybe Nat or Clint must have brought it over.
Since just when had his Tower had become a catch-all for junk?!
Another Roomba bumped him, Jonathan Quick. He was losing it.
Appetite gone, Tony simply stared at the pancakes Loki made him. Like he and Loki were now suddenly best friends that made breakfast for each other. He couldn't get into how messed up in his head that even sounded. Tony's stomach had tied itself into knots and his chest felt damp and dark even though he had gotten exactly what he wanted.
'"Operation: Hit it and 'Sho'get it" is officially complete.' Tony inwardly groaned, how he wished that dick Loki had let him explain himself the night before.
How he wished that he remembered that Sailor-fucking-Moon told him after that he could smell when people got frisky.
Apparently he smelled exactly like Berkley, no, Christine. Didn't matter. He apparently smelled just like 'Whoever her face' Everhart reporter for Vanity Fair and her play it safe perfume, Viktor Rolfe Flowerbomb perfume.
Where Sesshomaru smelled like a memorable autumn supercell he once weathered in the Rocky Mountains, she smelled like a delicious bouquet of all the right things.
After a morning that more than confirmed that the current obsession was doing the dirty with a master assassin in his own house; he was going to cut loose at the Gala.
Especially since he had received some chatter from some of his old weapons associates that Justin Hammer got some serious cashflow from out of nowhere and was rebuilding his shitty empire. Of all the fucking nerve. The same guy who tried to kill him was now trying to profit off of an intergalactic invasion.
There was just no justice in the world.
Flying first class to Kazakhstan and throwing the rest of your money into the perpetually burning fire crater there was a better way for the average joe to spend their 401k than funding Justin Hammer.
Once Tony figured out the current mess that was SHIELD's spies, and a prissy, pissed off Demon Lord and his squirrelly, roofie-happy best friend, he'd tackle Justin Hammer.
Most definitely even physically tackle Justin Hammer.
So, after some very necessary smoozing, courting, business deals for D.E.M.O.N.S., and of course shameless flirting and Chivas Royal, she emerged.
Tony could tell she had probably spent the better part of an hour and a half meticulously styling her hair, picking out just the right shape-hugging dress, and the precise set of false eyelashes to make him do a double take.
He did.
A really nice Balenciaga number, sapphire blue, clung to every curve and gave him a good, but tasteful peek of her cleavage. He thanked whatever being in the cosmos that she wasn't wearing red or white.
She strode to him in sky high stilettos that he pegged as Jimmy Choos. She raised a pencil-perfect eyebrow and palmed her matching clutch.
"Pittsburgh. Not exactly your style Mr. Stark." She cornered him at the bar and ordered a vodka tonic. If it was a gin tonic he'd have made her order something else.
"Pittsburgh brought itself from the ashes of a dwindling coal dependent economy to become a rising beacon of tech and green energy. Not sure what could be more my style." Tony had practiced that. He looked down his nose at her.
"That practiced speech could work on some of your brown-nosers here, but not me." She didn't look impressed.
Tony smirked.
"Guess not, Berkley." Tony replied slowly, sipping his scotch. Debating in his head what he really wanted.
She was practically everything a certain Demon Lord wasn't, down to the hardware.
"Brown. Not Berkley." She finally unleashed a killer smile. She knew how to use her charms, that was for sure.
This was comfortable. He could fall back into this routine.
He and Sesshomaru had never agreed to not sleep with anyone else, but that didn't stop Tony from getting absolutely irrational with anger over the prospect that Sesshomarucould be having sex with someone else. He had to break free of the complications he had gotten himself mixed up in.
They weren't going to amount to anything; he had to set his own mind straight. He and Sesshomaru never stood a chance of being anything more than fuck buddies. Right? Even if they did…it wasn't the right play for him.
Now, she was someone he could leave in the morning….someone he could use and not feel a lick bad about it. that was right. He knew she was using him too to get a juicy tip for a story about the invasion, Loki, or maybe even Sesshomaru. He wouldn't say a thing: loose lips sink spaceships.
But that didn't mean that he wouldn't let her think so. He's rather chew the glass that Thunder Muscles and Snake Brain regularly broke than give away anything about Sesshomaru.
Even if he was fucking Clint, which he didn't want to care or think about.
So, after a few (ok for him more than just a few) drinks they ended up in front of her hotel room door. She had purposely stayed at the Renaissance hotel the Gala was hosted in.
Room 808.
He pushed her against her own hotel room door, and she didn't resist the force as much as he expected.
She was a vision. And willing, more than willing, she invited him up, not the other way around. He didn't have to think of any sort of elaborate plan like he had to with a certain Dog Demon.
Tony wasted no time in bringing his lips to hers. It was so much easier when he didn't have to go to his tiptoes to kiss someone. She was shorter than him even with the Jimmy Choos.
She tasted sweet mixed with the flat, snap note of tonic. Could be way worse. He instinctively avoided sharp fangs with his eager tongue, but found that she didn't have any. Took some of the danger out of it, but of course none of the fun. Of course.
He waited for the unique buzz of youki to tingle through his mouth and the base of his throat, but nothing ever happened.
That was fine; he didn't need it. He didn't before the Demon Lord fell into his life and Tony Stark didn't 'need' on principle.
He pulled back and semi drunkenly planted kisses up her neck. She tasted like he knew she would. He knew this. This was old hat.
Tony bit down on an earlobe, and was a fraction annoyed about the half karat sapphire earring preventing him from really biting and sucking. In the end, the move elicited a predicable moan, that while a little high and vocal for his tastes, wasn't unattractive.
He didn't know how to feel about how her ears were rounded like his and not a tantalizing point he had come to appreciate. Obviously his own ears were round too. Nothing wrong with round ears because there was certainly nothing wrong with him.
He pulled back and stared her down in her hazel eyes. Her pupils were blown wide and round from lust. No lethally, carnivorously slit pupils that could pierce him through like a fish hook.
He wasn't hooked; she was. He could roll with that. He knew she was a good lay. OK, better than good, great.
He took her chin, which again was far easier when you're taller than the target of your lust. While feminine, it wasn't pointed or severe enough for him to get the grip he really wanted.
It was fine. He could get past it. The devil was in the details but he had danced with him before and always ended up on top.
"You gonna keep this outside or are you going to finally let me put the key in?" Her voice came out all syrup and sweet. The last time he had heard it, it intrigued and well, turned him on.
He willed the cognac in his system to get him going.
Maybe it was the cognac, and maybe it was something else… but…
His little Iron Man just wasn't feeling it fully.
'You've got to be kidding me. We had a fantastic time the last time she did that spread on us. Get it together.' He thought about what they did before, and the prospects of a repeat performance. It was stimulating.
Hot.
Fun.
Easy breezy.
Slam dunk.
She brought him back for another kiss and her manicured nails dragged down his back.
If she were Sesshomaru he'd be a filet-o-Stark by now. This why this was the smart play. She was everything right. She fit what he was, she and dozens of pretty women to come.
She was everything he had wanted before, and hell even more. He had bagged supermodels and other women who probably were more attractive but at least she somewhat interesting. One of those models he took back to the jet from one Gala couldn't carry a conversation if you gave her a bucket.
He could handle this; he needed this. It made sense. It was the logical, common-sense play. And if Tony knew anything; he was smart, damnit.
"I just love it when someone takes charge and puts it in." That wasn't a lie. He did. He totally did.
But he knew that she didn't have what it took to really put him in his place.
He'd always have the reins. Just like always, a bit disappointing. No, this was safe. This was the shallow end of the pool, where he could see the bottom.
Not starting down at a dizzying, depthless cliff, or into the Andromeda galaxy.
No fangs, no prissiness, no scrying, no sitting up in bed (she slept on her stomach, most others did too), no feeling ass-sore despite youki. no stupid long silver hair getting everywhere. Everywhere! No stripes and weird vague answers to questions that were pretty damn straight forward. No question games! No more of his nice forks getting turned into ninja weapons. No more of that fur thing getting all over him. No going off to sulk on the damn Chrysler building when his own tower had a perfectly fine (taller and thicker too, no euphemism) antenna. No creepy interspecies relations to speak of. No more hair washing or showering together or anything that blurred the lines he had firmly laser-cut into the sand.
Suddenly, his wrist was grabbed. He must have zoned out, damn maybe he was a bit drunk.
Instead of slashes of crimson that matched his Mark XLVI suit, there was a Cartier diamond tennis bracelet dangling from it.
His mind flashed to the time he had grabbed Sesshomaru's wrist at the sink when he brought back the crabs. Still so weird. He was so weird. Then later when he grabbed his own on the roof of his tower when he went off on him for going after the spaceship solo. Clueless, and reckless, classic combo there. Then his mind jumped to everything before then. When Loki had burned his wrists when they fought in the basement near substorage room 3-B.
He swore if Loki ever did anything like that again… He shoved the thought out of his mind. He didn't want to think about Loki. At all.
His mind plunged back into Sesshomaru's fiery gold eyes, glazed in blue youki. When he when he pinned him to the Quinjet floor by his wrists, golden eyes and silver hair all blue in the youki of the floor. His smile.
His little iron man perked up a bit.
His grip always smooth and hard, like porcelain coated vibranium. Only it had some give to it, and of course the talons that he could lengthen and shorten on command. And his wrists, just like the rest of his body, were thin and almost delicate to look at, but one touch and you could feel the power humming in his steel cable wire-taut muscles.
Just like a suspension bridge, stronger than they look. Ok that was a weird analogy; he had officially drank too much.
He doubted all Demons had that caliber of body awareness. Hell, not just his own body awareness, but Tony's own. Sesshomaru could make him writhe, make him crawl, make Tony fuck him into his own lab chair.
He remembered that smile, and that desperate oval his mouth made where you could only see the tips of his fangs.
His mind went to Clint seeing the same thing. No.
Tony looked up to Christine, tempting, glowing, and an automatic win. They were playing same the game that at first wanted to play with Sesshomaru.
But.
Tony Stark never half assed anything. He wanted it all.
This was no game anymore. He was playing for keeps. Extra Innings.
There was no way he was letting Clint 'I once challenged Thor to a rib eating contest and got sick at a TGI Fridays' Barton was going to outdo him in his own tower.
He was jamming the elevator down button so fast he: one, didn't know how he had gotten to the elevator so fast: two, didn't know how he suddenly had this impulse of clarity.
This was stupid. This was really, really backwards.
The cognac swirled in his brain, and fogged his other senses, but never failed to give him clarity on personal matters.
"Whoa Tony, where's the fire? Is there an emergency at Stark Tower? New York? Something from SHIELD? Chitauri?" Her voice buzzed unwelcoming in his ear and he made a face and turned to her.
"No, don't start your tweets to Teen Vogue yet. I'm just not in the mood." Tony wished the elevator would come faster, but his life was no perfect little movie.
"OK I am not buying that for a… oh wait. Has the big time Bachelor Tony Stark finally gotten leashed by Pepper Potts? You two back together?" Her pretty face lit up with 'juicy story' written across her forehead and all Tony could do was bark out a chuckle.
But he had been leashed last night… Sesshomaru had tied up his wrists with a whip he had no hopes of replicating.
He wanted to tie him up, vice versa. and every grey area in between.
"Hah, um no. Pepper Potts is the CEO of Stark Enterprises only, and way too out of my league. Leave her out of anything, I mean anything. Unless of course you want your career to be tits up and blogging on Buzzfeed about 'what junk food is your soulmate?'…and why isn't this elevator faster? I put the Gala in the one hotel with elevators slower than a nursing homes' wifi." Tony's blood pressure began to spike by this point.
"Tony. You can tell me if things are getting bad. Off the record. We got aliens, a downed spaceship, two Norse gods, only one trustworthy, and a Demon from hell all in your tower. Then someone shoots up your Tower and you lose your mind. What's really going on?" Tony's gut soured. He wasn't from hell. But. when she put it that way it sounded like he was an unhinged mess.
Except everything seemed to click in this moment. It clicked even though it shouldn't.
Even though this really, really wasn't the smart play.
"Off the record," He paused for effect. "I'm done playing games." Tony, again, thanked any being in the cosmos that the elevator dinged just that moment. He strode in, well probably more like swayed in but who cared?
The look on Christine's face was almost appeased.
"All work and no play makes Tony Stark a dull boy. I don't buy it." Christine scrutinized him the same way some of his MIT professors did when they were trying to assess if he was really smarter than them.
He was. Still is.
"The customer isn't always right." Tony responded as the elevator doors closed. He needed more alcohol for the Jet trip back to the tower. A lot more.
Tony Stark just decided to commit to something other than good scotch, stylish wardrobes, and thinking of good nicknames.
But that didn't work out too well.
Yet, Tony wasn't going to lie, he had thought Loki was going to give him a piece of his mind.
But he didn't, to Tony's incredulous shock. Not only did Loki side with him and think Sesshomaru overreacted but he also thought they'd be terrible together. Loki practically thanked him for attempting to hook up with a reporter.
Normally Tony liked people being on his side and thinking he was right, but he had been thirsting for a fight. He wanted Loki to go full 'Sesshoki' on him, saying what a jackass he was. He wanted Loki to go full diva, hating him for pissing off his bestie. He wanted the fight so he could work off the anger still thrashing in him.
'I wanted to Loki to try to lay into me so I could fire back that I was completely justified. Instead my anger just compounded. Who was Loki to say that we are bad for each other? Who was Loki to say that it was better for me to hurt Sesshomaru now rather than later?! Like I'd hurt him if we stayed together, I'd treat him so well. How dare Loki warn Sesshomaru off me?! Reindeer Games is so arrogant he even claimed to see this coming!' Tony simmered in his anger, not knowing what to do with any of it.
What right did Loki have?
Tony wanted to throw it back in Loki's face that all they had was just sex; it didn't mean anything. Loki couldn't prove otherwise.
But Tony knew it meant more even before the Gala. It had gotten to be way more than just sex. Tony saw Sesshomaru's smile. He washed his hair. He told Sesshomaru about his parents. He told him he thought he was the fastest thing he knew.
Tony wouldn't admit it till he saw the pancakes, but maybe one of the reasons he wanted to fool around at the Gala was to 'one-up' Sesshomaru. How dare anyone make Tony Stark feel like he was ever on the bottom to 'one-up' anyone in the first place? Because how dare Sesshomaru let anyone else see him as vulnerable as he saw him when he thought what they had was special.
He was special now by proxy: he was the only one to see during another of his night terrors.
Now that Tony thought about it; Sesshomaru might have been the first person to stay the night in his Stark Tower bedroom since the Battle of New York. Usually he took his 'pounce and bounces' to a hotel, or made them leave soon after sex to prevent them from seeing what Sesshomaru saw.
The PTSD panic attack. He had blamed it on Sesshomaru, which wasn't fair. Hell, once he even got a PTSD panic attack from simply seeing a NASA photograph of the Horsehead Nebula. The sniper shooting, and seeing Sesshomaru hit the stage was too much.
Tony reassured himself it would be too much for most people.
It was what he wanted to clear up with him that very morning. That the weird, awkward, tightlipped uptight Demon Lord had done better than paid therapists' advice at helping him get through one.
He just had to ask to watch the two conversations Sesshomaru had with Loki. He had to be that paranoid to know what Sesshomaru thought of the Operation. And obviously what he thought of him!
He wasn't about to touch the validity of the 'you're obsessed' statement Bruce said.
'Sesshomaru said he still wanted to go back to his time. He hinted at liking Clint, who always seemed to have Sesshomaru's back. Clint had appreciated the crabs when I called him weird for getting them. He had defended Sesshomaru when everyone and I ripped on him in the bar about how stupid his and Steve's Hufflepuff team was. Clint defended him when I made him feel stupid.' Tony's suspicions snowballed in his frazzled state of mind.
Then that next morning he saw him in the kitchen looking like a human wearing Clint's clothes and something inside him just snapped.
Sesshomaru looked like himself but at the same time completely different. Loki had taken everything he savored about him and rounded it. His taunting edges, his sharp points, his gold eyes, his long silver hair, his moon and stripes. Those ears. He saw the way he interacted with Clint and he didn't have time or the energy for it. Did Loki change him into a human to appease some weird desire of Clint's? Did his anomaly want to change everything he found unique about him for Clint?
Everything seemed like some inside joke he stood on the outside of. In his own tower even!
'The man who claims he has never left me and blips youki into my mouth during rough sex so I can actually sit down without easing down afterwards, is wearing another man's clothes. The Demon whose youki shimmers for me, who smiles for me, is changing himself for someone else. I don't want him to change a goddamn thing, not a single hair, not for me, especially not for anyone else. He is my anomaly and I mean that.' Tony recalled thinking exactly that as he took his cufflink from the counter.
That made Tony storm out, and that's when he knew that Sesshomaru had to be sleeping with Clint.
Tony had built this castle of evidence that Sesshomaru and Clint had a thing going all along. Only it fell like a house of Cards.
He had gone looking for anything to prove his hypothesis that Sesshomaru and Clint were friends with benefits that he cherry picked and highlighted weak data and wrangled it to a shoddy conclusion.
The conclusion that he had to act first before Sesshomaru really hurt him. A Preemptive strike, Tony knew weapons after all.
But he was wrong. Talk about confirmation bias.
Because Loki, of all people, was the one sleeping with Clint, not Sesshomaru.
Jeez, he thought he up to risky business, but Clint definitely took the title there.
'Sesshomaru does, did, like me for more than just a fun time. And apparently he wanted me to go meet his mom's spirit, not Clint. And apparently he is only nineteen in Demon years. That explains almost everything about his behavior that puzzles me: his obsession with proving himself, his relationship with Loki, the grunge, his broodiness, his pride.' Tony debated pushing his plate onto the floor like a cat and decided not to, the 'Corey Crawford #50' Roomba would just make a mess of it.
Bambi was the family Sesshomaru never had and Sailor Moon was the little brother Loki could depend on. He hated when Nat was right.
Especially when stakes were high.
Instead of Bruce, Natasha, Loki, and Jaken calling him out for being overly dramatic, everyone was on his side and that was somehow worse. It made him feel angry and stupid for wanting more than a fling in the first place.
The only one who thought they could work it out couldn't work a microwave and had the most unrealistic relationship expectations of all time. Thanks Thunder muscles.
'Good Luck working it out with a Doctor who has a much intellect as Bruce and I do while watching your little brother with Mom and Dad.' Tony grinned at that.
Except, it was the right call to keep it a fling because Sesshomaru lashed out at him at the first whiff of infidelity. Sesshomaru had been pissed.
Sesshomaru was hurt.
Which meant one thing, what Sesshomaru said in the shower: "…It is not in my nature to linger in one place for long…But this Sesshomaru is no slave to his nature." meant he was thinking of staying. He wanted him in return. And yet they just ended up hurting each other. Loki was right: they were terrible for each other.
Except it made his blood boil to think that.
He had heard what Loki said to him when he teleported him into his room. That he was dull and wasteful. Loki must at some point had thought maybe, just maybe, the two of them had a shot. But maybe when Loki thought about it more; he had changed his mind.
Loki now thought that Tony had done the right thing after all.
'So why do I feel like getting wasted all over again, to forget it all happened? Why do I keep remembering the glacial flatness in Sesshomaru's eyes and how flat his ears were against his head? It's almost like the cold, wintery tingle that needled through his bones still stuck with him. When Sesshomaru grappled him, it was almost as if the reassuring youki in his arc reactor spun to a halt as well. Why do I want to just see him again and try to talk things over, not just see him again to get frisky?' Tony pushed his cold pancakes around.
Tony had never been one to identify emotions effectively, or really handle them at all. He squashed them, ignored them, drowned them, etcetera blah blah blah… but he knew this one. He saw the emotion that Sesshomaru put out like he tattooed it over his moon.
Betrayal.
It frightened Tony, and seriously caught him off guard and unprepared. He never thought he would elicit that strong of a feeling in anyone, much less want to.
It was the one thing he wanted to save everyone from, 'hit it and quit its' didn't cause this much frustration and agony and horseshit he never wanted to step in. He knew first-hand what betrayal was like, and spent his life since Obedaiah avoiding it…til now.
Tony couldn't remember the last time he cared so much over how someone felt about him.
Tony, upon seeing Sesshomaru successfully pilot the Quinjet, felt his chest bloom with pride and his gut sour with tremendous envy. He wanted to be the one to be next to him, not Clint. He wanted to go to the Salt Flats, he wanted all of it.
Even after he had been strangled. Again. Was he some sort of abuse victim?
But no, let's think rationally. He really shouldn't be jealous of Clint, but he was. This was important to Sesshomaru and Clint was going with him because he made that stupid rule.
He needed a distraction. And a drink.
Bad company was still better than no company, and he didn't really trust himself to be alone. Drinking alone at...damn it was early. Drinking alone at 8:44 am in most circles meant alcoholism.
Drinking with a buddy over blueberry pancakes in most social circles meant brunch.
"Well, it's just you and me Toady." Tony got up to make himself a screwdriver.
"Hmph, For the last time my name is Jaken, and I am a Water Demon." Jaken stole one of Pepper's uneaten pancakes. Chivalry was indeed dead! He could have saved those for her.
"You're 'Toady', 'Lucky Charms' or 'Frogger' until you've proven yourself not completely useless." Tony decided to be giving and pushed the rest of his pancakes to Jaken. He immediately started to house them.
Maybe if Jaken could beat Thor in Mario Kart, he could beat him in a pancake eating contest.
"Useless?! Ill have you know being Lord Sesshomaru's retainer is far from a useless position. Your human affairs mean little to me, except they will most certainly bring ruin to my Lord and myself." Jaken, aka trash compactor, gobbled down the rest of his leftover pancakes. He slid slyly over to the other Demon.
Time to pump him for information.
"Yeah, yeah, you keep repeating that. You know, you're more 'gloom and doom' than Pepper when it comes to Board meetings. If you're going to be this much of a cynic, and if Sesshomaru is hell bent on staying to blast Thanos into goo, then why not help me kill two chitauri with one stone? Help me help your Lord survive the apocalypse and prove you're worthy of wearing my old AC/DC T-shirts." Tony took a deep sip of his screw driver.
Toady's yellow eyes bugged out of his head. He never stood a chance.
"Aha! So you admit you need my expertise! Not that anything you could come up with could help my Lord that much. You claim to be a genius blacksmith, but all I've seen you do is fly about and mouth off! Even that half Demon brother of my Lord, Inuyasha, and his insufferable friends could fare better than you in real battle. You are all talk!" Toady accused and Tony had to stop himself from saying that was rich.
Oh wait, no he didn't.
"That's rich coming from someone who literally can't shut up about how great 'his Lord' is and how everyone is a tire fire by comparison. You know he doesn't need a cheerleader right? He needs someone who can actually have his back and not hide in the fountain in Central Park." Tony loved egging this little idiot on. He stood up to leave the kitchen knowing Toady was baited.
"And that's what I call the Serpent Demon calling the Snake Demon long!" Toady squawked. Um what?
"You're in the year 2015, use our idioms: pot calling kettle black." Tony interjected, leading Toady to his lab. He didn't know how Sesshomaru did it, having this guy follow him around all the time. He thought Happy was terrible about small talk...yeesh.
"I refuse! And you cannot claim you don't say the same about my Lord! Of all the humans you spout the most of his abilities, and tinker with his youki in your suit! Don't think I cannot sense it. It is clear as a full moon that you are heavily infatuated with my Lord. I can see through your little charade! You still stand by my Lord even after he spurred you physically..." Jaken trailed off as he connected the dots.
Jaken: follows Sailor Moon around even though he gets knocked around. Tony: wants to get into Sailor Moon's pants even though this was the second time he had him by the throat.
Tony paitently waited for reality to set in, sipping his screwdriver.
"I am a loyal servant to my Lord. You are infatuated with him. He hits me, he hurt you…NO! I refuse to believe we have any common ground! This is absurd! I cannot accept this!" Tony smirked as Jaken visibly paled to a sickly pale shade of green that should be reserved for Mylanta bottles.
"Look 'potential high-school dissection experiment', I don't care what you can accept." Tony paused spotting his emergency bottle of Glenfidditch tucked behind some Erlenmeyer flasks. He also spotted a old water glass that Bruce had been drinking out of. He doubted Toady would mind.
"What I do care about is saving this planet and keeping Sailor Moon from getting in over his head. Whether Sesshomaru wants to admit it to anyone or not, he needs our help. People who have his best interests in mind and who can fight in this war. He's powerful, he's fast, and he knows it, but he can't do it alone, and I won't let him." Tony pounded back a hearty gulp of his screwdriver for effect. This invasion was on him, not a man who got kidnapped by his best friend to fix his mess.
Toady cocked his head to the side and sighed.
"Yes, yes, I know all of this you dull, dense human. I have stood by my Lord for half a century. I have witnessed his triumphs and his struggles. You ignorant blacksmith have only seen a sliver of his fortitude in battle. But, perhaps, too a sliver of his recklessness! He got me wet from that fountain in the park during his battle!" Toady spun around in what used to be Bruce's stool. He went from one big green sidekick to a little green sidekick.
"Ok, seriously, what's with the Blacksmith title?" Tony's curiosity got the better of him.
"You forge weapons, correct?" Jaken fired back and Tony pulled a face and scratched his goatee.
"That's not what I'm about anymore. I've been blown up by my own weapons. My ex-best friend tried to kill me with my own designs. Hell even Iva—" Tony was cut off by Jaken scoffing. Scoffing!
"What blacksmith stops producing weapons because they could destroy themselves?! That only encouraged Totosai! Doesn't that mean they were worthy of your creation if they very nearly ended your life? My Lord asked a blacksmith to create a sword from a Demon that once tried to kill him because it was worthy of him! The title, Blacksmith, is an honorable one. Do you believe, foolish human, that once this threat is disposed of that there won't be more threats? There will always be a need of blacksmiths, as long as the natural order of things continues." Jaken monologued and Tony leaned back in disbelief that Toady could…well actually articulate something.
He had never really thought about it that way.
"Natural Order? You mean entropy, everything eventually dissolves into chaos and disorder. One of the many things I don't need is a biology lecture." Tony was trying to follow Toady here and couldn't figure out if he should feel insulted that he couldn't predict his line of thinking, or reassured he was losing it.
"You humans are too blind and naïve to your own history. To obtain greatness! That Titan that comes here, those two infernal Gods, and Demons understand this. Ugh humans, too many of them, maybe my Lord should let the titan wipe some of them out! This is my Lord's burden to bare, and it is my duty has his retainer to make it easier for him to do so." Tony rolled his eyes, of course he had to get Jaken on his high horse again about some philosophical bullshit.
He pushed off the floor with his wheeled chair to grab a few tools, some leftover youki capsules he mad, some full, some empties, and the scotch. He actively avoided the toxins: Sirius, Cerberus, and Blitzen gathering dust in a locked down section of his lab along with the ammunition. He didn't care about any pep talk from Toady, those weren't seeing the light of day again.
"Ok, you want to make things easier for him? Then put your money where your mouth is and help me with this containment field I'm tinkering with." Tony goaded and tossed him an empty youki capsule. Jaken bobbled it five times before catching the damn thing. Some help.
"A containment field? Why would that help my Lord?" Jaken asked, turning the capsule over in his little clawed hands.
"Well, one way to make sure what you want doesn't escape, is to trap them. Youki and magic act as complete opposites. I'm not getting into the science with you. But if these guys are mostly magic, then a youki containment field should be able to trap them, or at least minimize the magic they can use in it. But I'm have a hard time sustaining it." Tony educated, throwing up a few holos to impress Frogger. He wasn't impressed and instead kept fiddling with the capsule.
"Perhaps you aren't as dim as Inuyasha's friends after all. My Lord and almost every other Demon sustains their youki in waves. You need to make his youki act in waves." Jaken finally put the capsule down and motioned his hand in waves.
"Waves huh. Makes sense, I should have thought of that. Show me the goods then Frogger." Tony saddled up next to his temporary Demon lab sidekick and began to sketch tidal patterns out, scotch forgotten.
"Jarvis, I don't want any interruptions. I don't care if the tower is burning down or Loki gets turned into a purple stag again, got it?" Tony commanded Jarvis, he needed some space, and he needed to distract himself until Sailor Moon got back to the tower and he could figure everything out.
"Yes sir." Tony sighed. Good maybe now he could get some actual work done.
After an hour or so, Tony began to miss having someone who actually could speak to him on an intellectual level. Tony, while keeping his promise to himself of banning the 'Jolly Green Traitor' from had lab, did miss having him by his side. It could have been worse, as much as he and Cap could talk about some things, he'd argue he'd be worse in the lab than Jaken.
So, he would take what he could get for now.
"Well, we made some minimal progress. What do you know, miracles can happen." Tony bit sarcastically and leaned back, rubbing his goatee. Jaken stretched out and hit one of the holos, bringing up D.E.M.O.N.S.
"That, is what I perfected the other day, I know your youki must have reacted to it: Distant Extraterrestrial Military Orbital Neural Signal. Aka D.E.M.O.N.S. Don't thank me now, wait for the main attraction which I had to cobble together at my Gala thanks to SHIELD failing to exterminate the rats in their H.Q." Tony gestured with a flourish, the diagnostic test of D.E.M.O.N.S via his miniature anti-ballistic missile interceptor launch point at the base of his tower.
Jaken cackled. Tony kicked the stool out from under him and watched him fall.
"Lousy human! If only I had my staff!" Toady dusted himself off for show. His lab was basically a clean room. "I felt your proximity barrier, if that is what you call perfection you have come up short!" Tony heard the insult, but was more watching Jaken's body posture. He seemed a lot more interested in it than he led on. Boom Natasha, see reading people like a textbook.
"You cannot be serious about me coming up short. They had mirrors in your time, or a yardstick, or in your case maybe a ruler, right?" Tony picked up the pencil Toady had been writing with and held it high above his head. To his disappointment Jaken didn't flail and jump after it. Poor sportsmanship.
"I'll have you know that I was considered quite tall for my tribe! I even ruled over them before I met Lord Sesshomaru and became his retainer!" Jaken protested.
Now this was interesting. This little guy led a tadpole village and he gave it up? Maybe he got tired of being a big frog in a small tidal pool? Tony reached for the scotch and poured it into the glass that was Bruce's. Now it was fair game.
"Someone like you just giving up power to follow someone around? Sounds more like your little tadpole scout den got tired of your inflated ego. Bad campaign? Coup d'etat? Voter Fraud?" Tony had long ago finished his screwdriver and poured the Glenfidditch into his own glass. The remnents of OJ would just help its flavor. Possibly.
Jaken stilled.
"They were almost entirely wiped out by a stronger Demon. We tried to fight, but it was no use. Then suddenly Lord Sesshomaru appeared and saved us! I owed him a life debt, a very serious matter in Demon culture. I vowed to serve him until my services were no longer necessary." Jaken eyed the glass of scotch suspiciously. Tony pushed it closer to him.
"Why did he save you?" Tony took a slow sip of his scotch. The OJ definitely didn't help. Clean glass next time. He fiddled with a gravity equation while Toady grasped the glass of medicore scotch lightly.
"I don't know. I never asked him. My Lord can be quite mysterious and secretive with his motives! He helped Inuyasha and his friends multiple times for no real gain and tolerates his horrible mother who never bothered to even remember by name." Jaken swirled the liquid and brought it up to the light as if inspecting it.
"Another reason I'm glad I was an only child….It's scotch! Just drink it Froggy Walker Green. It's not green label though, as if I'd waste the good stuff on you and I've had enough of green." Tony finally pushed the glass over to him and Toady took, what Tony would consider a pretty champ gulp of the stuff.
"I can handle anything you humans can! Especially you, irritating Blacksmith." Jaken took another swing and Tony quirked his eyebrow at the title again, but he would let it slide. Weirdly, he got where Toady was getting from. A bit. Maybe that was the Grey Goose talking.
"Handle things? Toady you literally have to handle that glass with both hands. You know that right? Me: one, Toady zero. Anyway. Back on track. With D.E.M.O.N.S. we can extend Moonie's senses past the stratosphere to orbit Earth. We can get the jump on them before they can show up to crash the party since I bet they have ways to get around NASA's detection. No more uninvited guests, I have enough of those in my tower anyway. Damn squatters." Tony sipped more of his scotch, the bitter OJ taste long gone. Jarvis cycled through the projections of the satellite simulations through six different permutations of coordinated missile launch points to cover most of the globe, save the north pole.
Sorry Santa, you'll have to get Rudolph to guide more than your sleigh.
Tony rubbed his hand down his face as Jaken literally climbed on the worktable. Usually only drunk college kids did this. Who knew where his feet had been. Dum-e would have to decontaminate everything.
It was then he spotted a long silver hair. He let it lay there.
"My Lord and that troublesome Magic God have already spoken about where the next vessels will land, but this isn't a total waste of your efforts. Not that all of this isn't futile anyway, all this spells doom." Jaken nearly flopped off the table from staring straight up and poking the hologram.
"Ever a 'ray of sunshine' aren't you? Weren't you just harping about how Sesshomaru is the strongest Demon you had ever come across?" Tony decided he'd have a word with Loki about discussing battle tactics with Earth's biggest loud mouth. "He went through the trouble of saving you and now you just doubt him and are the biggest Debbie Downer other than Bruce. Ugh, I just said the word Debbie downer, I might be turning into Cap." Tony grimaced, disgusted with himself but also over Toady's 'tude.
"My Lord scyed his own demise, and others. Scrys aren't guesses; they are visions of the future! I suspect it is why he went to go see Inukimi, his underhanded mother." Jaken narrowed his eyes, in what Tony supposed was supposed to be intimidating. On the table, he was about his height while sitting down.
He wondered how he'd react if he told him he had bent his precious Lord over it and fucked him senseless the other night.
He'd like to do that again, have it done to him.
No. No. No. Tony. Bad ideas. He swore he thought this before at some point.
"So that's why he went to go visit Mommy Dearest. You don't seem to like her much, Reindeer Games at one point said not even he had met her, that Sesshomaru said she was barely around, living in the sky or something." Tony hoped that the liquor was beginning to work in Jaken's little limbs since his usually big eyes had gotten pretty squinty.
"Yes, all true, and I shutter to imagine what would occur if that Magic God and Inukimi would meet. Nothing good would happen, that would be certain. Inukimi is a fearsome and self-serving Demoness. I have only met her once when my Lord sought her out to finish completing the Meidou Zangetsu ha." Jaken, officially completely useless at this point, had flopped onto the table, back up looking at the hologram like a teen girl would stargazing on a first date.
Lightweight.
"The Zamboni what?" Tony prodded and he too began to feel the scotch take hold. It was then he looked around his lab to make sure he didn't somehow summon one of the hockey Roombas.
"A powerful technique discovered by Lord Sesshomaru that could send Demons straight to the Demonic Underworld. He no longer has the ability; he selflessly gave it to his unworthy brother. He sought out his mother because she was the only other Demon who could open portals to the Demonic underworld using the Meido stone." Jaken sat up adruptly. "However, I suspect, as does my Lord, that this enemy has the power to do so as well. That or they have the Meido Stone. It is the only way Ryukotsusei could have been in that vessel Lord Sesshomaru shot down." Jaken had begun to sway and Tony patted himself on the back. All it took for Toady to fully open up was a little mid-shelf scotch.
"Yeah. Bambi lost what little control he has when he learned that Ghost Demons were a part of Thanos' party bus. We will find a way to beat them; it's nothing we can't handle. In fact, it's why I first made Blitzen." Tony thumbed the display case and Jaken paled again to that sick shade of a Mylanta bottle.
"Per usual, you humans miss the point. Whoever has the Meido Stone can send my Lord, or any human he wishes to the Demon Underworld. There is no surviving it. Inukimi sent Rin there where she perished just to teach my Lord a lesson." Tony choked on his scotch, it came out in spurts.
"Ack—um what?!" Tony still sputtered.
"She returned Rin's soul back to her only once she proved her point. Humans are fragile creatures and when Lord Sesshomaru placed Rin in my care of all things I had to learn to become even stronger. Lord Sesshomaru helped train me just like your mild-mannered Berserker." Jaken rambled and Tony made a serious, serious note of discussing his psychopathic mother with Sesshomaru when he got back. She had the power to send people to hell. Literal hell. And the goddamn chitauri somehow probably have it, or something like it.
God, he thought his parents had issues.
"Why if Lord Sesshomaru didn't show up when he did, I could have beat that bandit!" Tony ignored Jaken's blubbering.
"You know, you're not so bad Frogger. You basically just admitted to getting stronger, 'achieving greatness' as you call it, to protect Rin. Under that scaly green skin you're just a little softie after all." Tony flashed a grin that was all teeth. Jaken scrambled and promptly fell off the table.
Didn't spill the scotch though. No party foul. Style points.
"It is my duty to do as my Lord wishes to the best of my abilities." Frogger climbed back onto his chair and reached again for the scotch. Tony refreshed his glass for him.
"Just admit it, Lil Miss Sunshine has warmed your cold blooded frogger heart." Tony was definitely going to keep this up.
"Has not!" Toady protested.
"Mmmm has too." Tony persisted, childishly. "It's not a bad thing, embrace the whole Nanny thing." Tony tried his first experiment on the wave design for the Youki, it sloshed to life in the containment cube he had set up for it, but to his dismay looked highly unstable.
"I am no nanny. I—fool! That's not what I meant by a wave! This is what I mean by a wave!" Jaken grabbed his scotch glass and Tony hoped he wouldn't dump it everywhere. Jaken instead put his whole hand over the glass. Was he about to get 'Criss Angel mind freaked' or whatever it was called?
Yet the scotch inside the glass began to wave…inward? How was that possible? That defied everything about the laws of nature and physics. Right where the waves would collide into each other they instead spun like a whirlpool upwards into a dome.
Unreal.
"Jarvis, you're rendering this into an algorithm right? I need you to run the parameters on this and map me a usable model. I think Toady here just broke fluid dynamics." Tony marveled for a minute before tapping the screen and recording the phenomenon.
"I have broken nothing. Behold the power of Water Demons!" Tony could tell that Jaken was maybe concentrating too hard for as drunk as he probably was.
Well, he too was a little drunk. He did just forget to carry that one.
"Don't get ahead of yourself, Aquaman. Sounds like my original hunch was right, you might be a big help after all." Tony smiled, if this didn't knock the pants of Sailor Moon he didn't know what would.
Of course, it was important for the invasion and everything, but impressing him and maybe catching that smile…or ass.
Wait. No. Stop just stop Tony.
"What are these?!" Tony hadn't even noticed that Jaken had stopped the wavy whirlpool thing and had picked up one of Sesshomaru's spare 'hear ain'ts'.
"You've never seen those? I made them for Sesshomaru weeks ago. His eardrums burst when Point Break blew up my microwave trying to make…well something, and I made them for him to dampen noises." Tony slurred a little bit, mouth drying a bit about the memory of him standing shirtless and soaked in the doorway of the bathroom.
Those abs. Those stripes arcing over his hips and the ones that raced up his ribs. He wanted to run his fingers along them at least one more time.
Jaken remained silent. It weirded Tony out. Little Green was almost as chatty as he was.
"…You know, Dog Demon ears, they're more sensitive." Tony rambled.
"… you just gave them to him?" Jaken's head tilted to the side.
"Uh yeah. I mean he wanted to give me something in return but that wasn't my angle." Tony replied honestly, kinda confused where Frogger was taking his cross examination.
Jaken just remained silent for another minute and put down the hear ain'ts.
"Together we will be much better at helping Lord Sesshomaru than that Magic God. I still don't fully trust him." Jaken slurred. Tony brought up wave videos on youtube on a lark and found one of surfers riding what appeared to be a hurricane swell.
"Ever hang-ten frogger?" Tony expanded a surfing video "Also, jealousy isn't a good look on you. Just because you were replaced by Horns as Moonie's number one doesn't mean you can't win him back." Tony grinned, then frowned thoughtfully. The horrifying thought that he actually had something else in common with Toady made an unpleasant shiver run up his spine. Winning him back from Clint. Gross. This whole conversation was gross.
Iron Toad.. Tony grimaced. Christ.
"Hardly! No one can take my place by my Lord's side; we are the last of the Demons. That Mischief God spelled me asleep to speak to Rin in private about something. Something private pertaining to Rin and Lord Sesshomaru. It was something he didn't want Rin to tell our Lord, I just know it. I say it was something that happened on the Distant Realm. I also don't trust he has told us everything about this enemy we face either. If Lord Sesshomaru suspects the same he hasn't told me!" Jaken huffed and wobbled. Tony didn't really think he'd get that blasted.
The surfing video began to play some 90's grunge song which Moonie would totally be into.
Jarvis, for reasons unknown, probably a bug, at least it better have been one, brought up the lyrics. Savage Garden: I want you.
'Come stand a little bit closer
Breathe in and get a bit higher
You'll never know what hit you when
I get to you'
"I'm with you Frogger. I already chewed out Reindeer Games for using Sesshomaru to clean up his mess. I trust he is on our side, but there is something he isn't telling us. He is still trying to pull all the strings. I'd bet my nicest Maserati he is hedging his bets and is tapping his fingers together scheming some failsafe plan like Mr Burns." Tony muttered mostly to himself.
Asgard. Rin. His father almost skewering him. His crazy black magic. Torture PTSD. It'd be naïve to think he didn't have something up his sleeve and in a way, he almost didn't blame him for it.
But he did.
Because when it came down to it, Loki was in deep over his head and refused to admit it. And instead of coming clean, he thought his little games could save him. His games would fuck them all over. Fuck Sesshomaru over, well again.
'Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but
Ooh I'd die to find out.'
Maybe that was why Frogger was such a Debbie Downer. Their most experienced player was going to end up being their biggest liability.
What a fucking train wreck.
"Indeed! My Lord has been prudent in keeping some of his abilities from all of you!" Jaken was so close to spilling all his beans Tony could taste it.
"Secrets?! Between us friends? I'm hurt Toady." Tony, on the edge of his chair began to run through the possibilies.
Telepathy.
Laser vision.
Controls weather.
OK so maybe he just thought of three X-men.
'Getting comfy, getting perfect is what I live for
But a look and then a smell of perfume
It's like I'm down on the floor
And I don't know what I'm in for.'
"Humph, I may speak my mind but I will not reveal my Lord's secrets even if I don't know why he keeps them. Maybe you should ask him yourself." Was Jaken seriously smirking at him? What sort of inside joke was he not a part of?
"Did you stroke out over there? Do you forget he tried to kill me the last time he looked at me? Strangle play is only OK if it's in the bedroom and there is a safety word in play. My safety word is always 'Language'. There is always some cursing involved." Tony knew he was rambling and maybe the innuendo was over his head, but it was more for his own benefit than Jaken's.
Despite the missed humor, Tony tapped his youki swirling arc reactor which ran a bit cold for his tastes.
He had pretty much forgotten what it felt like to not have youki in his arc reactor by this point, but the chilly feeling he could really do without.
"Yeah I don't think we're what you call on 'healthy terms'. I think those nut jobs who write prisoners have a better shot of a solid relationship than we do." Tony murmured lowly, as if that truth muted something deep inside him. Wait, did he just say relationship?
He couldn't let Loki be right. Could he? Nah, maybe he should just give Horns this win. Give up. Throw in the towel. It had been a good run. The next time he ran into Christine Everhart he'd be game. It had just been too soon and he had too much scotch.
Right. Yeah.
Jaken cackling grated Tony's skin like a belt sander. He was laughing at him?! Fuck he KNEW he should have never let him in here.
"My Lord, kill YOU?! If my Lord wished you dead, you would be frail human. My Lord has maimed stronger for lesser offenses than you and what you've done. My Lord, whether he knew what he was doing or not, was bonding to you for an intended mate. Lord Sesshomaru has chosen you to meld his youki with, that is not to be taken lightly and he would have not killed you unless for a stronger slight. Also, Blacksmith, if what you claim is true, that dense Storm God is right, my Lord would most likely hear you out. He is not without reason, and his markings are still red." Jaken took another damn greedy gulp of his scotch and Tony had never been more confused.
'Conversation has a time and place in the interaction
Of a lover and a mate but the time of talking
Using symbols, using words can be likened
To a deep sea diver who is swimming with a raincoat.'
"…Ok. Come at me straight Toady, because in the kitchen it sounded like you wanted your precious Lord nothing near my 'repulsive human ass'. Which, by the way is not repulsive. I was rated top eligible bachelor for like seven years running." Tony wasn't sure why he brought up the last point. But he did anyway. He also didn't know why it mattered to him in the least that Frogger, of all life forms, approved of his relationship with Sesshomaru or not. Wait. Did he just think 'relationship' again? Ugh…..
His gut churned and Jaken picked up the hear aints again.
"You, even though are a mere repugnant, arrogant human, recognize my Lord for who he is. You expelled us from your fortress, but redeemed yourself by retrieving him. You are the only one here perhaps intelligent enough and loyal enough to assist Lord Sesshomaru in his goal of defeating this Titan. Also, I cannot remember anyone ever giving my Lord something and not expecting anything in return aside from Rin and I." Jaken announced, fiddling with the hear aints and Tony swore he almost looked nervous admitting something like that.
"And, ha! If that Mischief God dislikes you and Lord Sesshomaru together then all the more reason for me!" Jaken continued. Tony was at this point 100 percent sure that Jaken was tanked because the last part was slurred more than he probably sounded like coming back from the Gala.
'Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine.'
Tony absolutely refused to acknowledge any vindication in what Jaken said. He and Sesshomaru were dysfunctional. They weren't naturally compatible. They hurt each other, the whole hypothesis that they could work would most likely be proven false.
But.
Maybe.
That was just because the experiments they were running were the wrong ones.
He had been running from this the whole time. Deflecting right? Blaming their natural chemistry on, well, just an initial attraction, curiosity. Then blaming the rest on the youki in his reactor. Then running from, well a very real probability.
They should probably actually experiment in, well, both coming to terms that there was something there. Something worth fleshing out. Tony cringed visibly. This wasn't him. Not by a sniper's shot. He had no clue what he was doing. But, he wanted to actually fight for it.
Tony would never admit to being apprehensive.
'I may move so slightly to the arms
And the lips and the face
Of The Human Cannonball that
I need to I want to.'
Fuck it.
He never went half in on anything before in his life. He had faced worse odds. Much worse.
One last shot.
Let's put it all on red and spin the wheel.
Maybe, maybe, there was an outside chance they could be….blegh…good for each other. They just needed to….actually…shudder…communicate.
Why. Why couldn't he have just settled for faceless supermodels? Wait. That totally wasn't even really settling. There were some that were just as attractive as he was, objectively! Ok, well, fuck.
He thought it. He supposed it had to be true. He had it bad.
"You know Toady, I think I may just know exactly why Sesshomaru saved your scaly green skin." Tony managed to croak out, his throat tightly squeezed out the words and he had no idea why. Scotch. Had to be.
"Sir, Steve Rogers and Miss Romanov request entry." Jarvis interrupted and Tony grumbled. He and Jaken were literally on a roll with their orbital progression waves. He was not about to touch on anything else they were talking about.
"Tell em to leave a message, no better yet…speaking of waves and surfing. Jaken, you can strike a pose right? Tell Steve and Natasha to hang ten…like ten minutes." Tony's mouth broke into a wide grin as he moved on to the next one and Jaken mimicked one of the surfers in the video.
"What would you know of Seshsomaru's motivations for saving me, Blacksmith?!" Jaken bit out, going back to before he was rudely interrupted. His whiny voice didn't have it's usual indignant tone so Tony took that as a queue to continue.
"You're like…his weirdo liaison to the outside world. If it wasn't for you, Lucky Charms, he'd probably be some…recluse, maybe a JD Salinger type. Think how awful it would be if he only had Bambi as a friend." He and Toady both shared a guiltless grimace over that.
"They say it's urgent sir, Loki of Asgard and Thor Odinsson are outside they also request Retainer Jaken's presence." Tony huffed, didn't they all just sit around like a sorority and talk in the kitchen? Couldn't he get some damn privacy?! And 'Loki of Asgard', when did his name go and change?
And they wanted Jaken? Since when? Of course, once he had started getting buddy-buddy with Lucky Charms everyone else wanted to talk to him too.
He wasn't in the mood for another family intervention.
Tony was sober enough to know how incoherent his thoughts were, which meant he couldn't really that drunk.
"Fine. Let's see what Star Jones and the rest of 'The View' wants." Tony stood, beginning to really feel the scotch now. Jaken hopped into his chair, the same one he fucked Sailor Moon into the other night. Tony's scotch swirled mind caused him to grin mischievously.
'He and Sesshomaru just couldn't be over, they just had to do that again. Next time even filthier.' Tony wrangled his liquor-lusted mind as he opened the workshop door to everyone swarming the door like fans at backstage events he used to do.
"Youuuu raaaaaang?" Tony's words slurred just a hint and he saw Steve give him a classic 'I can't believe this' glare as Jaken failed to walk in a straight line. Whatever, like his feet could reach the pedals in a car anyway.
"We lost radar contact with the Quinjet four minutes ago over Iowa." Natasha wasted no time, her face set like drying concrete.
In fact, everyone's was. Why were they all looking at him? Was there something he wasn't getting?
"Um…" Tony struggled. "OK…." Quinjet, radar, the salt flats. Sesshomaru looking hot piloting it.
Oh. Oh shit. Clint and Sesshomaru. Ohm's law he was a fucking mayhem magnet.
Thanks for the long wait on this chapter. I had to split Tony's part into two halves because it was getting to be so lengthy! The next half should be up soon however!
Thank you all for your favorites/follows and reviews!