Edward's lips were soft, and Roy felt himself almost melting into it. He didn't push though, he let Edward lead - this was on his terms, and no matter how much Roy was enjoying it, Ed had initiated the kiss after all.
Almost as quickly as it started though, Edward pulled away, he felt like his face was on fire. "Oh my god, oh shit, I am so sorry." Edward cringed, recoiling away from Roy like he'd been slapped, "Fuck, that was not okay, that was so not okay - "
"Ed." Roy said calmly, the man was already on edge and he didn't need Roy to add to it.
Edward began pacing around the dining room, and Roy could see his hands shaking, "I mean, you picked up Annelise for me and watched her, and then you invited me to stay for dinner, and I go and fuck this up, like I always do -" Ed added, bringing his hands up to his head and pulling at his hair, "B-Because every time things start to go right I have to fucking mess them up - "
Roy gently grabbed at Ed's shoulder, placing a firm squeeze on it to try and get Ed to focus. Edward paused, standing in front of the entryway to the kitchen, his face away from Roy, "Hey, stop." Roy stressed, his tone firm to try and get Ed's attention. "Turn around and look at me, please."
They stood still for a minute, and Roy waited patiently, the only sound in the house was the kids in the living room.
Slowly, Ed turned back to face Roy, and he could see there was no anger on Roy's face. They stood about an arms length apart, Roy's hand resting on Edward's shoulder and he could feel his body shaking. Roy wanted to do so many different things, like pull him in for a hug and let him know things were going to be okay.
"Ed, if I didn't want you to kiss me you would've known." Roy said, letting his hand drop from Ed's shoulder, "Trust me, I enjoyed that."
"You…you've wanted to kiss me?" Edward asked, searching Roy's face for any disgust or anger. He found none, and Roy just smiled softly at him. "Me?" Edward asked again, looking for clarification, to which Roy just nodded once more - his smile only growing.
"You know, for someone whose a genius you can be really blind at times." Roy said with a small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips, "I've been laying it on pretty thick since we had coffee together."
Edward started tugging at the ends of his hair, twirling it around his finger - a nervous habit he had since childhood. "I was kind of a walking zombie until a few weeks ago." Edward said, looking anywhere but Roy's direction, "You were talking to a brick wall."
Roy nervously shoved his hands in his pockets, "Well, brick walls can be pretty entertaining." Roy grinned, "Especially when they have gorgeous blond hair, are insanely smart, and have a bit of a smart mouth." He chuckled as he watched Ed's face heat up, before taking a tentative step forward, his hand softly brushing against Edward's cheek, "How could I not fall for someone like you?"
A loud squeal came from the living room, followed by the sound of toys crashing on the floor, and they were both brought back to the reality that was parenthood. Edward swore under his breath after he took a look at his watch, "I can't have this conversation right now," Ed said seriously, his gaze turning up towards Roy, "It's late, I need to go home and get Annelise to bed."
Roy nodded in understanding, haven't not realized it was so late. "I need to get my boys to bed as well." He agreed, "Can we finish this another day?"
Edward took a deep breath before nodding, "But, not…" He paused for a second, stumbling over his words as his gaze falling back to the floor, "not right now, I'm not, i-it's too soon, right?" He asked, looking back up at Roy for some sort of clarification, "Six months is too soon, isn't it?"
Roy gave him a soft smile that didn't quite meet his eyes, "Only you can decide when the time is right, Edward." He replied, his thumb softly stroking Edward's cheek once more, "But when you're ready, I'll be here."
Edward felt his heart swell and break at the same time, and he nodded as he pulled away.
But the soft smile never left Roy's lips, because Edward would be so worth the wait - no matter how long it was.
It was almost nine o'clock by the time Edward got back to Al's house, carrying a fully passed out Annelise on his shoulder. Walking in to the house, he found Al sitting in the living room, watching Criminal Minds as he scrolled aimlessly through his phone. "Well, look who finally came home." Al said in a teasing tone, getting up from the couch and walking towards his brother, "Need some help?"
"Yeah," Edward said softly, handing over Annelise to Al, "Can you put her to bed?" Edward asked, "I, I need to take a shower and think.."
Al took Annelise into his arms, and smiled as she made a soft sound in her sleep, before sending Edward a look of concern, "Are you alright?" He asked, taking in Edward's overall 'off' state. "Did something happen?"
Edward kicked off his shoes, before tossing his and Annelise's bags on the bench, "Sort of..
I just need a shower." Edward mumbled, and he seemed almost zoned out as he went through the motions, "I'll explain after, I promise." Edward said, sending Al a smile that didn't quite meet his eyes, before taking off his coat and hanging it on the hook on the wall.
Al just nodded, trying his hardest not to pry, "Okay, I'll get Annelise ready for bed then." Al fretted, as he took off Annelise's Mary Jane shoes and placed them by the door. "I want to hear all about it after your shower." Al added, sending Edward a look that reminded him of their Mother - a look that meant no funny business.
Edward just nodded in understanding, before he walked off towards the bathroom, leaving Al standing in the entryway utterly confused.
Just what the hell had happened at Roy's house?
In the shower, Edward felt his best thoughts always came to him. He was able to work out his own mind, which was a never ending abyss of darkness at times. The sound of the water hitting the floor was almost soothing, and how its scalding drops felt on his skin helped him stay present and not get lost in the corridors of his own mind.
Which bought him back to his present situation - Roy.
He liked Roy, he really did.
That was the scary part, the part that made his stomach do summersaults and
He felt like the time was right, almost.
He knew Winry wouldn't want him to be wallowing in misery, she'd want him to find someone and be happy. Someone that would love Annelise, and him, and would understand him…
Which led him right back to Roy.
Roy was everything he wanted, someone who understood him for him. Roy didn't question his pain, he understood it because he'd been through it before. That was comforting to Ed because Roy didn't require him to explain anything, he just understood. And when it all became too much, and Edward felt he was losing himself, Roy was there with soft words of support and warm hands that pulled him through it.
Would it really be so wrong to let someone else in?
When Ed came out of shower he saw Al back on the couch, having resumed his episode of Criminal Minds, with a cup of tea in his hands. But as soon as he saw Ed entering the living room, he quickly paused the episode and sat his mug of tea down onto the coffee table, "Alright, what's going on?" Al asked, hand patting the spot on the couch next to him as an invitation.
Ed threw himself down onto the couch and let out a big sigh, before letting his head fall into his hands, he drew in a long breath before he spoke, "I kissed Roy." He blurted out.
"Finally!" Al said excitedly, "Only took you like, forever."
Edward shot him a dirty look, and Al felt the smile fall from his face. "So, something went wrong then?" Al asked, throughly confused ,"I'm afraid I'm not following, maybe you should just tell me the whole story."
Edward started from the moment he got there, telling him how Roy was excited that he had gotten the job at university and went on to explain the dinner. "So we're sitting there at the table, and he's got this look on his face and is staring at me." Edward started, now laying down on the couch while Al, now sitting in the corner of the couch, followed with rapt interest. "And I start thinking to myself, is it okay that I'm feeling this about Roy after Win has only been gone for six months." Edward paused for a moment, feeling the dread spread inside him at just the thought of six months and his mind immediately went to the numbers, twenty six-
Hands are in his hair, Al had moved next to him and he could feel the soft warm puffs of Al's breathing. "Hey, I'm right here." Al said, his voice soft as his fingers dragged through Edward's damp hair. "You don't have to explain that part, tell me what happened next."
Edward was so tired of the dread that wouldn't ever leave him. But Al's soft hand in his hair made him forget it, even if it was just for a moment.
Edward let out a long, shaky breath he didn't know he was holding, "O-Ok, so Roy helped me through that, and he was holding my hand and saying all this nice shit, like he'd shoulder some of my pain if I let him." Edward explained, "The kids were playing in the living room, and I told him that was stupid because their's a lot of other shit I haven't even told him about."
Al chuckled, "You're so eloquent when someone is clearly flirting with you." He said, and Edward smiled. "So, is that the part where you kissed him?"
Edward nodded, "He, He wasn't mad about it though." He explained, "He said he liked it, and he'd been wanting to kiss me for awhile."
"You're just now picking up on this?" Al asked, and Edward just nodded. "Sometime's I wonder how you got the whole genius thing, they should do another IQ test on you."
Edward let out an annoyed puff of air, "They said I was an academic genius, I've never been good at other shit." Edward grumbled, grabbing the pillow next to him and burying his face in it.
Al stood up for a moment, stretching slightly, before picking up his mug of tea and taking a small sip. "So, what did you do after that?" Al inquired, wondering at what point this got bad, because from his understanding nothing really bad happened.
Edward was quiet for a minute, moving the pillow down from his face and instead hugging it close to his chest. "He said 'How could I not fall for you?'", Edward mumbled, "And then the kids started going kind of crazy, and I told him I couldn't have a conversation like that right now." He continued, before pausing and lowering his face into the pillow, "I then asked him if six months was too early, and he said that I was the only one who could choose when the right time would be."
Al stood still, arms crossed over his chest, thinking over everything Edward had just admitted. "Did he say anything else?" Al asked, feeling there was still a piece missing - something else had been said to make Edward overthink everything.
Edward was quiet for a moment, enjoying the silence. "He said he'd wait for me." Ed all but whispered, eyes frozen on the end of the couch. Maybe he could will himself away from everything if he stared long enough, even if it was just for a bit?
"He's got it bad for you, Brother." Al declared after a moment, "You've got Roy hooked."
Edward felt like he was going to explode, "I know that, but what the hell do I do about it?!" Edward snapped, and he could feel tears prickling in the corners of his eyes because everything was piling up on top of each other. Getting a dream job after not working for six months, someone confessing their feelings for you, and just the overall stress of being a single parent and a fucking widow in his twenties - it was a lot for one person.
Al let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair, before taking a seat next to his brother. He wrapped one arm around Ed's shoulders and pulled him close, "Oh Brother, I think you've just had a lot go on today and maybe you should sleep it off." Al said, "Why don't you go to bed, and then maybe tomorrow morning get up early and go for a run, that seems to always help you."
Edward was quiet as he listened to the beat of Al's heart, something that had always soothed him since the car accident when they were young. He nodded slowly, "Been awhile since I went on a run, endorphins are always good." Edward muttered, "They do this thing to your brain that makes pain go away, acts like an analgesics."
Al had to let out a laugh because it was so like Ed to make something have a science twist to it. "Go to bed, you dork." Al chuckled, giving his brother a squeeze before letting him go.
Edward slept very well, despite his circumstances.
It was five thirty when he got up the next day, and the sky was just starting to turn a dark shade of blue as the sun began to wake up. Normally, Ed hated being awake this early, but the thought of a run was enticing - especially when he needed to clear his head. So he dug through his closet and found some black dri-fit running pants, a gray long sleeve, and a thin tank top to wear under the long sleeve. Despite it being mid-October, it still wasn't quite 'cold' yet so Ed only needed a pullover hoodie as a coat. Plus, Ed hated running in a coat.
After getting dressed, Ed quickly brushed his teeth and tied his hair in a high pony tail. He tried to stay quiet, not wanting to wake Annelise or Al.
Grabbing a water bottle from the kitchen, Ed filled it up as quietly as he could in the dark house. Walking into the living room, Edward dug around the pile of shoes by the door, searching for his running shoes. Finally finding them, he pulled on the bright red shoes and as he stood up he put his wireless earbuds in, and began cueing some music up on his phone before placing his keys in his pocket as he walked out the door.
Standing on the porch, he did some quick stretches to make sure his muscles were ready - it had been awhile since he'd gone running. After that, he started his playlist, placed his phone in his pocket, and took off - starting with a light jog before deciding his pace.
Running was nice, all he had to really think about was moving his legs and controlling his breathing - and of course make sure he didn't run into anything. It was always something that had cleared his head, and he enjoyed long distance running.
It was nice, the cold morning air hitting him while he ran as the music played. He wasn't really sure what he was listening to, he had just hit play on his iTunes library so it was probably stuff from his teen years. But, he could tell it was some pop punk stuff, he had been really into that - and still kind of was, when he was younger. But it was nice to listen to while he ran, the beat making him want to run faster.
He wasn't really sure how far he wanted to run, or for how long since it was his first run in several months. He loved running in Resembol, he'd actually had done cross country from middle school all through high school because he'd found running really helped him. In Resembol he had found many empty trails that seemed to go on for forever. He always had the whole trail to himself, and he could find peace. But here in the city, it was a little different, he didn't have the whole place to himself and of course their were cars - maybe Al could tell him about a hidden bike trail or something for next time.
Even if it wasn't perfect, he felt at peace as his mind was finally quiet. His lungs burned, as did his flesh leg, but it was in a good way.
The sun was beginning to rise, and Edward finally felt he needed to stop and take a break. He slowed to a stop, and took a long drink from his water bottle. Letting his head fall, he took a few minutes to take a breather, before pulling his phone out of his pocket to look at the time.
Which showed he'd been running for over an hour.
Al was going to kill him.
He quickly called Al, and Al didn't even let the phone ring before answering.
'Are you okay?' Al answered, words rushed out quickly and taking no time to say hello or anything. Edward figured Al must've assumed he'd gotten hurt on the run, because it certainly wouldn't have been the first time time that'd happened.
"Yeah." Edward panted out, still not fully having caught his breath, "Just, I dunno, got lost in my zone I guess." He replied with a soft chuckle, leaning against the brick wall next to him, "Didn't really plan to run that fuckin' long, sorry."
'Didn't know you still had that endurance or stamina after six months off.' Al replied, and Ed could imagine him smiling, 'But don't worry about rushing back, I've already got Annelise up and can take her to school.'
"You sure?" Ed asked, looking around, trying to figure out where he was, "I can sprint back."
He heard Al chuckle on the other line, 'Brother you've been running for over an hour, do you realize how far you are from home?' Al questioned, 'You're probably up by the university, and their's no way you'll be back in time to get Annelise to school on time."
"Ehh, true." Edward admitted, looking around his surroundings. He could see a park nearby, and several shops the next block over, "I think I'm going to grab a coffee and something to eat then jog back home."
'Alright, let me know when you get back since I'll be at work.' Al said, and Ed could hear Annelise giggling in the background, 'And please don't become a patient today, let's not have another coffeeshop incident.'
Edward just laughed, "I promise I won't," He paused for a minute, looking up at the cloudless sky above him, "Hey, give Annelise a hug and a kiss for me, and let her know I'll pick her up after school."
They said their goodbyes, and Edward hung up the phone. It was five till seven and Edward didn't really know where he was, and all he had on him were his keys, his phone, and a water bottle. Telling Al he was lost was absolutely not happening, especially since Ed had his phone on him and he could just use the maps app to figure out how to get home. He started walking over to the next block, seeing a coffee shop sign and after waking up so early Ed definitely needed some coffee.
The coffee shop was cute, it had a European theme to it and was called Epic Coffee. Ed only hoped the coffee lived up to its name, because Ed really needed some good caffeine in his system after waking up so early.
It was then that his phone dinged, signaling he'd received a text message, and Edward pulled his phone out of his pocket.
(824): I'm sorry if anything I said, or did, upset you last night. That was the last thing I wanted to do, I put you on the spot and that wasn't fair, especially with the kids being there. I'm sorry, and I do hope you will forgive me.
Edward just stared at the screen, surprised that Roy had apologized when he was the one who had acted out of line. He plopped himself down on the red iron chair that sat outside of the coffee shop, he began to quickly type a reply back.
(903): Why the hell are you apologizing? I'm the one who kissed you and said a bunch of weird shit and had a fucking panic attack which ruined dinner. No reason to apologize, hell I'm the one who should be saying sorry to you.
Ed let out a groan as he stood up from the chair and walked inside the coffee shop, he didn't want to deal with this drama yet. The run had helped, it made him clear his head and think through things - which was probably why he'd run so long without noticing. Once inside the shop, thank god for Apple Pay since he'd forgotten his wallet, Edward ordered an americano and an English muffin before taking a seat. His phone once again dinged, and Edward groaned because all he wanted to do was enjoy his breakfast and not deal with his feelings.
(824): Are you able to meet somewhere, I think this conversation would be better in person.
Edward stared at the screen, reading the little blue text bubble over and over. Was he ready to face Roy so soon? It had only been around twelve hours since everything had happened, and Ed was hoping he could hold off just a little longer.
But, Roy did deserve answers after all.
(903): I'm down at Epic Coffee by the university, wanna come here after you drop the boys off?
Roy wasted no time in replying, saying he'd be there in around fifteen minutes. Edward sunk a little in the booth he was sitting at, wondering if he'd just made a mistake or if it'd be the best choice he'd made in six months.